What to do if the husband is rude, nervous? The husband became aggressive and irritable - reasons, advice from a psychologist My husband is a very bad person.
Sun Wu Yu laughed, "I didn't say you were dirty. I only said I was a germophobe, so please stay away from me."
Song Jiu Mei's face turned red again out of anger. From the way she looked at Song Wu Yu, it seemed like she wished to be able to swallow Song Wu Yu once and for all due to her raging state.
"Mostly it was you who called me dirty!"
The corner of Song Wu Yu's lips turned up in a cold smile, "I really can't do anything if you insist on calling yourself dirty."
“You…” Song Jiu Mei became so insane that she raised her hand, intending to give Song Wu Yu a good slap in the face.
In the past, Sun Woo Yu has always been naughty and spoiled. But it was always directed at outsiders.
Song Jiu Mei knew very well that inside Song Wu Yu was a simple straw bag. This woman was easy to bully.
In the past, there were times when she slapped Sun Wu Yu, but Song Wu Yu never fought back. Because she knew that she still needed to rely on the monthly allowance provided by the Song family.
But this time, Song Jiu Mei's raised hand froze in the air. She couldn't move forward or backward.
She stared at Song Wu Yu in amazement. This dazed expression appeared as if she had seen a terrible ghost.
In the face of Song Jiu Mei's raised hand, Song Wu Yu was not afraid. Instead, her chin lifted with pride and a mocking smile as she stared at Song Jiu Mei.
Song Jiu Mei was frightened by the sudden aura that Song Wu Yu emitted.
Usually, or rather always, the moment she raised her hand, Song Wu Yu would disappear in fright.
Today, she didn't even dodge. Instead, Sun Wu Yu practically used invincible coercion to suffocate her.
Song Jiu Mei's eyebrows knitted together. Why was she suddenly so different from the past Sun Woo Yu?
The aura and temperament she now had was completely different from Song Wu Yu with the damaged reputation she knew.
"Do you want to slap me?" Sun Wu Yu asked with a curious expression and a faint sneer.
"A slut like you deserves to be hit!" Song Jiu Mei angrily threw daggers at Song Wu Yu.
At that moment, she was frightened by Song Wu Yu's dominant aura and temperament, but did not want to humiliate her persona as an arrogant and noble daughter of a rich man. She was still arrogant and steadfast, sharply glaring at Song Wu Yu.
Hearing that word, Song Wu Yu's eyes became colder, narrowing dangerously.
Song Jiu Mei's haughty and unyielding demeanor reminded her of the Empress in her past life. That woman from the past also made things difficult for her.
She, Song Wu Yu, was the one who fought alongside the Emperor in conquering the world. However, in the end, it was her cousin who received the title of Empress. Then she was spoiled by Heaven and vice versa by the Emperor.
She herself could only be satisfied with the title of imperial wife, living in a difficult situation. The Empress relied on the Emperor's affection for her and abused the Empress's power to make her life a living hell.
One day, the Empress ran into her and suddenly slapped her. Then Song Wu Yu looked at Her with suppressed anger, "Why did you hit me?"
The Empress's face turned red with rage, a finger pointed directly at her face, and she sternly condemned, "A whore like you deserves to be hit!"
Later, Song Wu Yu found out the reason why the Empress was so furious at the time. Because that day she dined with the Emperor.
"What did you just say?" Sun Wu Yu laughed, her voice sounded light but cold.
"I said you whore deserve to be hit!"
The piercing sound of flesh meeting flesh resonated in the air. It attracted many pairs of eyes.
Song Wu Yu exerted so much force that Song Jiu Mei's head turned to the side. This smooth white skin has a bright red five-finger print mark.
Xu Jing was stunned. Her mouth opened into a perfect "O" shape as she stared at the red handprint on Song Jiu Mei's cheek. Her eyes fluttered nervously back and forth between Song Wu Yu and Song Jiu Mei.
"Miss... Did you hit the Second Miss?"
After she slapped her face, Sun Wu Yu casually shook her hand. Then she rubbed her slightly numb palm.
The peaceful smile at the corner of her lips was imperceptible, but the atmosphere around her was so tense that it made people take a sharp cold breath.
"Mrs. Gu was said to be arrogant and tyrannical, also disobedient. It seems to be true."
http://tl.rulate.ru/book/8105/153078
Translators: Chaotica
Help unwind. Need advice, perspective.My husband has changed in the last six months. It became unbearable to live. The thought of divorce never leaves my head.
Our history is like this. He is 4 years younger than me, we met when I was 25, and he was 21 on the Internet, corresponded for a year, met, fell in love. He went to the army, for a year I went to another city every two weeks, spending all my salary on him, on food, on the road. We even managed to go on vacation to the sea. Everything was at my expense. But I never thought about money. His mother, despite the fact that she lived 10 minutes from the unit, never came and fed her son. Sometimes, it seems to me that my mother-in-law is my daughter. So she behaves ... then he came to me .. To the capital. Little did I think at that moment, I just loved madly and believed in our happiness. And we began to live in an apartment with my mother. There were no options. Began to look for work. It didn't work, my sister helped. I took him to my company, taught me how to work. So we lived for a year. He was always a radiant, insanely sociable person. I got along well with my mother and lived generally well. A year later, he changed jobs and began to earn extra money, made me an offer and we got married. A son was born. With children's money, he decided to open his own business. I was very resistant, with a newborn in my arms without a stable job. I was scared. I then patted his nerves, but deep down I believed in him. It was difficult, we survived thanks to my mother. She never regretted anything for us. And fed and watered. He took a risk in defiance and in spite of everyone, and we can say he succeeded. Two years later we were able to buy a nice apartment in a new building. With the help of my mother and sister. They lent us the missing money. And from that moment it all started. Since the new year. He didn’t go home several times, after drinking with friends, and he didn’t goof around somewhere, but walked around the city all night .. And I begged, the time was not calm, she talked about her son, mom doesn’t sleep all night .. In general, such There were three walks. Further .. As soon as he drinks a little, he becomes aggressive, angry, runs into a quarrel, can offend. I became nervous when he plans to drink, I ask him to know the measure, this results in a scandal. And the last time there was such a scandal (before a party), he told me all sorts of things. I still can't come to my senses. He said that he hates me, that he lives only for the sake of his son, that I got him along with my family. The next day he went for his walk and did not come to spend the night. Showed up in the morning, as if nothing had happened. In general, my heart is torn from resentment. It turned away from him so much that I can not look at him. My mother says that she is tired of him, that something happened to him, like the roof went. She is tired of us, says that I will die, he will outlive you. I want to emphasize that he began to behave this way for the last six months. Inadequate, irritable, and drunk form is unbearable. Is he really like that, just hiding his face for so long. We lived only 5 years. What to do? It's a shame, because we never lived for our family in our house, which we dreamed about so much. And when it is here, this moment is near, so take it and destroy everything. It's a shame. Give advice. How to lead what to do? Is it worth going to reconciliation or will it not change already, but in your apartment it will be worse. I'm scared.
Valeria Protasova
Reading time: 9 minutes
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Any man has certain “pain points”, by accidentally or specifically influencing which a woman risks provoking not just an attack of aggression, but a vendetta with all the ensuing consequences. Read: A man confident in cynical betrayal can retaliate cruelly and subtly. Women's and men's views on this issue diverge. If a woman takes revenge impulsively, in a state of passion, then a man approaches the matter with a cold head or does not take revenge at all, because he is lazy. How do men take revenge? And why?
Reasons for male revenge
There are many external factors for turning on the “red button”. The root of vindictiveness grows even from a young age. If the boy grew up in a happy family, if he does not have complexes, if his parents taught him to express his claims adequately, then, having matured, he will never take the path of retribution. Main factors that provoke men to revenge are:
- Reacting to feelings that went unanswered.
- Ignoring signs of attention by a woman.
- Doubts of a woman in male solvency spoken aloud.
- Separation initiated by a woman.
- Treason. Read
- Making fun of male power , noble impulses, deeds, etc.
- The woman is too busy with the child .
Also, it is impossible not to note such reasons as:
How do men take revenge? Ways of revenge
There are less “destructive” ways of male revenge:
Features of male vindictiveness
Of course, there are exceptions, but, as a rule, the man who threatens you is not capable of revenge. Having let off steam at the stage of threats, he will simply be too lazy to carry out what has been said. A man really capable of revenge will not talk - he will do. Small dirty tricks and actions "out of spite" are normal for any man who is not indifferent to a woman and offended by something. Quite often you can see how men deliberately spoil the mood, scare women, underestimate self-esteem, take away cherished credit cards, etc.
To protect yourself from living together with a future avenger and from the consequences of revenge itself, pay attention to "alarm bells":
Revenge, as such, is the need to gather strength and deliver a blow that will bring you closer to the desired goal - to satisfy your resentment. But nine out of ten men will not do such stupid things for one simple reason - they will be too lazy. Therefore, traditionally male revenge is an impulsive, insignificant and almost childish act, which in a woman causes only a smile.
Katerina Zl
Hello!
I am 39, my husband is 41. We have a daughter of 13 years and a son of 2.6.
There is a problem in marriage, I don’t know how to get out of the situation, everything is slowly getting worse.
I'll start from the beginning. We met, I fell in love very much, for some reason I did not dream that everything would work out for us. But everything worked out, and I was very happy from his presence. We had to be separated for 9 months, but this only strengthened the feelings. We began to live together, rented an apartment. Nevertheless, I was very afraid of making a mistake in my choice and put off marriage for more than a year from the beginning of a joint life.
For about 5 years it was a perfect marriage. We rented an apartment, he didn't want children. (although he played with strangers so much that you just admire it). But I was already old (25) and I said that either he would be the father of the children or I did not see the point in living together. He agreed, and we were preparing for the conception of the 3 month. A daughter was born, the relationship was good. From birth, my daughter cried a lot and physically exhausted me, my husband did not help much with her, my relatives lived in another region, his family was also in a neighboring village, I alone took care of my daughter and there was not even an hour when I parted with her. There was improvement and I seemed to be coping - I came in good physical shape, despite the fatigue, I looked good. But there was an insult to my husband, which does not help ... At that time, my love for him was shaken, but on the contrary, it intensified. Again, what kind of love, if not caring for your spouse? His love is strange, in which he loves only me alone. I began to notice that he did not love his daughter or something. She irritates him. But nevertheless, I thought that I live well, that we live in perfect harmony.
Then we moved to the region to my parents. There was a prospect with housing, but in the old place - only rent apartments. We lived with my parents for a year, during this year we built our own house. My family was the main support. My father built a house, my husband and I are on the hook - I with light help, my husband with physical help. The husband's family sent us money for the roof, the amount was very helpful to us. At that time, I got a good paid job and we had all the money for the construction site, no one helped with money. My husband worked for my brother, the income was small, but at least that's it. In general, we work during the day, at the construction site in the evening.
They settled in the house. They did landscaping right away - a washing machine, a shower, tap water ... My husband grew up in a well-appointed apartment and got used to comfort, therefore, what can you do to do nothing. This is where the first stumbling blocks began. Your house requires a man's hand - and the husband came home from work, flooded the stove and lay down in front of the TV. Well, my daughter and I prevent him from hearing what they show and say there.
I made little, I made a lot. The husband was not particularly worried about money, and about the maintenance of the family. He got a job, some friends turned up there, where he began to drink with them, come late and even in the middle of the night.
Here, at the moment of beginning drunkenness, I condoned a little - I did not believe that a non-drinking husband could become a drinker. I thought she would understand what she was doing. But, I didn't understand. Everything has become systematic. And now, for ten years, he has been drinking on weekends. The first years through the weekend, or something like that. Now - every. At first I drank with friends. Then, somehow he began to drink alone, by himself. He drinks, sleeps, watches TV and again, drinks and sleeps.
There were moments of completing the construction of the house - they did the interior decoration with their own hands - I did all the calculations and drawings, what to where, at what distance, he is physical strength. The house is spacious and big.
All this time there were ups and downs in marriage. I either rushed to get a divorce, but he blackmails me with the house (he will burn it, not for him or anyone, go wherever you want), then again I built a life with him, because he is an interesting person - sometimes I listen to him, I don’t come off and I don’t believe that it’s him speaks.
The topic of a second child was constantly on my mind. I wanted a son. The husband did not want anyone, mainly because of fear, what to teach, what to grow? It seems like he would like to, but he does not take responsibility. I still decided that I would give birth, because I didn’t want to look for another husband - and it was a very balanced decision on my part. Preparing for conception, he did not drink for 4 months.
Shortly before that, my husband bought a TV on credit, a big one, he paid for a year. Hung it in our bedroom. It tired me. I wanted silence in my sleep. Somehow I persuaded him to move the TV from the bedroom to the kitchen - there are 36 squares of space, let him watch there. I didn’t enter the hall, because initially it hung in the hall, but for some reason my daughter and I constantly blocked him, then prevented him from watching. I was indignant that, in our house, are we going to walk on the same floorboard?
It looks ridiculous, but we disturb our husband with our presence in the house.
There is a large sofa in the kitchen, and with the birth of a son, the husband went to sleep in the kitchen. There is a TV, a sofa and a snack if it's a weekend.
Well, we can’t eat in the kitchen in the evening without a quarrel - why do we go, but when will we settle down, but when will you get drunk? (children always want to eat in the evening, we go to bed late, because we teach lessons, and the younger one won’t fit in anyway) (the kids are thin, I’m not fat, so that somehow he could reproach us for gluttony).
I propose a divorce - he does not want to share the house, he believes that the house is his. I can’t leave the house, because I gave all my salary for 10 years to the construction site, paid off the loan for the car myself, dressed the children, paid all the bills. I'm half ready - either I tell him, or he tells us - but he doesn't want to - everything suits him.
He constantly reproaches his daughter, like a stepfather. Son, no matter how I send him to my dad to play, he doesn’t go to him, it’s just a whole problem. Although I would like so much that my son would play with her husband at least a little in the evening, and not hang on me. And so in front of people, he is proud of his children, beautiful, smart.
Over the years I have tried to close my eyes to many things. And succeeded. But I don’t understand how this happens, what to do, how to feed the children in the evening, do things in the kitchen? There was a period a month ago when the husband slept in the bedroom, it was so convenient for everyone. But, the son fell ill, cried at night, and the husband again settled in the kitchen.
And somehow, everything is bad between us, as between spouses. All these strife, from the outside, are ridiculous, but how to live like this? And I would have left, clung to this property. I understand that it is possible to start everything from scratch, but it's such a waste of time, and will I have time to achieve the level of my previous life? My work is stressful, every day I'm literally on the line. And I can’t leave, who will feed me.
Katerina Zl Hello! If the only thing that worries you in a relationship is that you can’t get along with your husband, interfere with each other, then you can give your husband not a kitchen for relaxing and watching TV, where everyone goes, but, for example, give him a separate room - let him sleep there and watches TV and no one will interfere with anyone.
But, as far as I understood from your story, you don’t want to live with your husband and want to get a divorce, because he drinks and you seem to interfere with him all the time with children, he doesn’t help you with money or business and he has no relationship with children add up. The only thing that stops you is that the husband does not want to share the house, because it is convenient for him to live there. Did I understand you correctly?
Specifically, you can deal with this issue in court. Consult with a lawyer - in a divorce in court, you can raise the issue of the division of jointly acquired property and alimony. Considering that four of you live in the house - you and your husband and children, the husband will get even less than half of the house according to the law. You can sell the house or exchange it for two apartments, for example.
If you do not want to live with your husband, then it is not necessary to leave, leave everything to your husband and start all over again in the material plane. The property issue is resolved - consult a lawyer and you will receive several solutions regarding the division of property.