What are the cultural norms and rules of conduct in public places? How to behave in public places: be a real lady

Manners largely reflect a person’s internal culture, his moral and intellectual qualities. The ability to behave correctly in society is very important: it facilitates the establishment of contacts, promotes mutual understanding, and creates good, stable relationships. Therefore, in order to raise true ladies and gentlemen, you should clearly understand why all these boring rules of etiquette are needed in society.

Description

The established moral standards are the result of a long process of developing relationships between people. Without observing these norms, political, economic, and cultural relations are impossible, because one cannot exist without respecting each other and without imposing certain restrictions on oneself.

Important! Etiquette is a word of French origin meaning manner of behavior. It includes the rules of courtesy and politeness accepted in society.

Modern etiquette inherits the customs of almost all nations from hoary antiquity to the present day. Fundamentally, these rules of conduct are universal, since they are observed not only by representatives of a given society, but also by representatives of the most diverse socio-political systems existing in the modern world. The people of each country make their own amendments and additions to etiquette, determined by the social system of the country, national traditions and customs.

As the living conditions of mankind change, the level of education and culture grows, some rules of behavior are replaced by others. What was previously considered indecent becomes generally accepted, and vice versa. But the requirements of etiquette are not absolute: compliance with them depends on the place, time and circumstances.

Interesting to know! Behavior that is unacceptable in one place and under some circumstances may be appropriate in another place and under other circumstances.

Etiquette norms, unlike moral norms, are conditional; they have the nature of an unwritten agreement about what is generally accepted in people's behavior and what is not. Every cultured person must not only know and observe the basic norms of etiquette, but also understand the need for certain rules and relationships.

It should be noted that a tactful and well-mannered person behaves in accordance with the norms of etiquette not only at official ceremonies, but also at home. Genuine politeness, which is based on goodwill, is determined by tact, a sense of proportion, suggesting what can and cannot be done under certain circumstances. Such a person will never violate public order, will not offend another by word or deed, will not insult his dignity.

Unfortunately, there are people with a double standard of behavior: one in public, the other at home. At work, with acquaintances and friends, they are polite and helpful, but at home with loved ones they do not stand on ceremony, are rude and tactless. This indicates a person’s low culture and poor upbringing.

Important! Modern etiquette regulates the behavior of people in everyday life, at work, in public places and on the street, at a party and at various kinds of official events - receptions, ceremonies, negotiations.

So, etiquette is a very large and important part of universal human culture, morality, morality, developed over many centuries of life by all peoples in accordance with their ideas about goodness, justice, humanity - in the field of moral culture and about beauty, order, improvement, everyday expediency .

Why are standards of behavior needed?

Oddly enough, etiquette rules exist to simplify the process of communication and mutual understanding. Compliance with norms of behavior directly determines how we are perceived by people around us. Etiquette is a ready-made set of forms of politeness that allows you to communicate within the human community without thinking and almost automatically.

Etiquette is a tool with which you can achieve a positive result from communicating with your own kind. This property of etiquette today is irreplaceable in everyday life, therefore the rules of etiquette are constantly evolving, and today we can distinguish rules of behavior for a public place, work, for intra-family communication, business conferences, ceremonies and much more.

Etiquette is based on the reasonable requirement of respect and recognition of the dignity of each individual. Since man is a social being, it is quite reasonable to assume that in his daily activities, he must somehow take into account the opinions of other people surrounding him at a given moment in time.

It is not for nothing that many ancient teachers recalled the golden rule: “Treat others the way you would like them to treat you.”

Basic Etiquette

Norms and rules of behavior in society apply to all forms of human interaction with the outside world. Well-mannered behavior implies that a person reacts correctly to any events and does not respond with outbursts of anger to negativity.

Manners

Kindness and consideration for others are the most important rules of social behavior. But the list of good manners is quite extensive. Let's consider the main ones:

  1. Think not about yourself, but about others. People around us prioritize sensitivity over selfishness.
  2. Show hospitality and friendliness. If you invite guests, treat them as your closest people.
  3. Be polite in your interactions. Always say greetings and farewells, thank for gifts and services provided not only in word, but also in deed. A letter of gratitude, although it seems like a relic of the past, will be appropriate and pleasant for the recipient.
  4. Avoid bragging. Let others judge you by your actions.
  5. Listen first, then speak. Do not interrupt your interlocutor - you will have time to express your point of view later.
  6. Don't point your finger at people or stare with piercing eyes. This confuses them, especially disabled people.
  7. Don't violate someone else's personal space - for example, don't get too close to people you don't know and don't wear stuffy perfume. Never smoke in public without asking permission from your interlocutors, especially in the presence of non-smokers - no one likes passive smoking.
  8. Avoid criticism and complaints. A person with good manners tries not to offend people with negative statements and does not complain about fate.
  9. Stay calm in all situations. Anger not only leads to unnecessary conflicts with others, but also brings dissonance into your own inner world.
  10. Control your speech so as not to raise your voice, even if you start to get nervous.
  11. Be punctual. Being late shows that you don't know how to plan your day and don't value other people's time.
  12. Keep your word. An unfulfilled promise can lead to real tragedy in the life of the person you hoped for.
  13. Repay your debts on time. Failure to comply with this rule often causes not only the end of friendship and good relationships, but also serious enmity.

Cloth

Appearance is given great importance in business etiquette. Business people tend to adhere not so much to fashion as to a certain level in their appearance. The basic rule when choosing clothes is its strict correspondence to the time and setting.

Business style

Most companies pay special attention to the clothing style of employees; the way employees are dressed and the way they behave in the office creates a certain impression of the company’s image among potential clients and partners.

In addition, the dress code performs a number of important functions: clothing emphasizes the specifics of a particular situation, and also plays a decisive social role, to one degree or another reflecting gender, social status, profession, financial viability, as well as a person’s attitude to style and fashion and traditions.

Men should pay special attention to shirts:

  1. Many men prefer plain shirts, while stylists do not recommend creating a business wardrobe of plain shirts that differ from each other only in a shade of the same color. Ideally, a business man’s wardrobe should have at least ten shirts of different colors and shades. Universal colors: grey, dark brown, dark blue, tan and white.
  2. Pastel shades are allowed in the color scheme of business shirts, but too light pastels look quite festive, so it is better to avoid such shades in an everyday business wardrobe.
  3. Vertical striped shirts are quite appropriate in the wardrobe of a business man. As for the sleeve length, the only correct solution in this case is a classic long-sleeve shirt. Hairy arms are not the most pleasant sight.
  4. The official office dress code, as well as the standard one, does not favor checkered shirts, wide bright stripes, or items with prints and designs. Clothes should not distract the attention of colleagues and partners; in some countries, a certain combination of checks or stripes is associated with belonging to a particular national or political movement, therefore, in order to avoid misinterpretation of your image, it is better to keep your business wardrobe in a monochromatic manner.

You also can’t help but pay attention to the trousers:

  1. Pants made of light fabrics distract attention from the shirt and the image as a whole. You should not wear light-colored trousers to an interview or business meeting; it is better to give preference to trousers in black, dark brown, dark blue or charcoal gray. The hem of the trousers should lie on the top of the shoe, but not gather into unsightly folds at the bottom.
  2. A shirt that matches the color of the trousers gives the impression of a military uniform; a win-win option is dark trousers and a light shirt, but not vice versa.
  3. Denim clothing is, of course, very practical, but in a business setting it is not appropriate, especially when it comes to distressed and light-colored denim. In some companies, the dress code allows the presence of jeans, but for the most part such clothing is allowed in small companies associated with creativity, advertising or IT technology.

The office dress code for women differs from men's in a wider selection of colors and clothing options in general.

The base of a woman's business wardrobe is discreet, elegant suits with trousers or a skirt, classic-length dresses, pencil skirts and shirt-cut blouses.

  1. In business clothes, glitter, various sequins and rhinestones, abundant embroidery and applique, bright flashy colors and prints are unacceptable. Anything that distracts attention from your professional activities is not particularly welcome in terms of business dress etiquette.
  2. Representatives of the fair sex, at least those who would like to achieve career growth using exclusively their professional qualities, should avoid short skirts and too tight clothes.
  3. The color scheme of a women's business wardrobe is elegant and discreet shades; the presence of rich colors, for example, fuchsia, turquoise, and shades of precious stones, is allowed as a color accent in some ensembles.
  4. A business woman's shoes are classic pumps in beige or black or shoes with heels. Ballet flats and mules are comfortable, but it's best not to be seen by your boss, clients, or business partners in these shoes.

Formal dress code

Those who believe that an evening dress is necessarily a long, chic dress are mistaken. Evening holiday costumes are as varied as our everyday clothes. And the choice of one dress or another completely depends on the event that is expected. There is even a special etiquette for evening dresses.

It is clear that evening is different. There are both official and unofficial events. And if the latter allow a fairly free choice of outfits, then the former are limited to certain limits.

  1. “White Tie” is the dress code for an event that is particularly solemn. This could be an awards ceremony, a presidential reception, or other evenings of a similar level. Women's attire for such events should consist of a long dress in non-garish colors. Hands must be covered, so gloves are required. The look of an elegant lady should be completed with high-heeled shoes and a small handbag. Jewelry and loose hair are not allowed for this style of clothing.
  2. “Black Tie” - long or cocktail dress. Jewelry may well be used as decoration, but gloves are not necessary. In such an outfit it is quite possible to attend theater premieres or wedding banquets. Use a fur coat as a cover-up, although the presence of fur in clothing is not a prerequisite for dressing for such events.
  3. “Black tie is welcome” (Black Tea Invited) - this form of clothing is allowed at events where relatives and friends are present: corporate parties, family celebrations. Here you can easily wear a regular holiday suit as an alternative to a cocktail dress.
  4. “Black Tie Optional” is another type of clothing for loved ones and family celebrations. Here, an outfit assembled from elements of several sets is allowed.
  5. “Black tie, creative approach” (Creative Black Tie) - this form of clothing is in many ways similar to Black Tie, the only difference is that non-standard solutions in composing clothing combinations are welcomed here. Creativity is not prohibited, but on the contrary, it is encouraged.
  6. "Semi Formal" The dress code largely depends on what time the event starts, be it a family dinner party, a corporate event, or a dinner party. Before 18:00 you can come in a day dress or just a festive suit. If the meeting time is scheduled for the evening, then you need to wear a cocktail dress.
  7. “Cocktail Attire” - semi-formal events. Despite the name, you don’t have to limit yourself to just a cocktail dress. Festive outfits are also quite suitable.
  8. “After 5” - a similar name indicates the time of the event - after 17:00. If there are no special instructions, you can wear the same outfits as for Cocktail Attire.
  9. "Dressy Casual" - all these evenings are semi-formal. The only requirement for a woman is that she must wear clothes from famous designers.

But it must be said that etiquette is not limited to just matching the type of meeting and the dress code. The rules also apply to the level of openness of the female body. For example, a dress with a low neckline should not be worn to events that take place before 6 p.m. It is appropriate only after 20:00. And if your outfit has a deep neckline, then you can only wear it from 22:00. You can bare your shoulders only after 19:00. If your outfit includes gloves, then the following rule applies: the shorter the sleeve, the longer the glove.

If the holiday starts after 20:00, then you can wear silk kid, fabric or lace gloves, and complement your holiday clothes with a handbag made of beads, brocade or silk. A hat - if you put it on, then during the evening you will have to constantly be in it. But this is only when you are not the hostess of the evening.

In this case, you are not entitled to a hat. There are rules even on fabrics that are used for various events. So, for meetings that take place until 20:00, fashion designers suggest using clothes made of silk and wool. If we are talking about an evening dress, then crepe, brocade, tarfa, silk, and lace are used. Remembering such rules of etiquette is not so difficult, but with their help you will never find yourself in an awkward situation.

The ability to present yourself

We all know that the most important thing is what is inside a person. But at the same time, we unconsciously continue to evaluate others by their appearance and behavior. And the first impression is often so strong that it can be extremely difficult to change it in the future. As a result, a person cannot climb the career ladder, win the favor of others, find his place in the team and more.

Advice! This is why it is so important to learn how to present yourself correctly when communicating with other people.

This is the only way you can form the right impression of yourself and show others how interesting a person you really are.

To attract appropriate attention, it is not enough to wear a fashionable suit and purchase expensive accessories. If you want to present yourself correctly, then you should approach this issue comprehensively.

  1. Identify your strengths. You must understand what exactly sets you apart from others. For example, you can make decisions quickly, easily win over other people, and have an excellent sense of humor. Having understood your unique qualities, do not hide them from others, but actively demonstrate and put them into practice.
  2. Learn to be proud of what you have. No matter how gray and boring our lives may sometimes seem to us, in reality, each of us has something that we could be sincerely proud of. A cozy apartment, a collection of retro records, interesting work, talented children, true friends. Enjoy these moments and don't be afraid to show them off a little to others.
  3. Don't be afraid to talk about your achievements. Even if some time has passed since then. Excessive modesty can decorate few people. And you shouldn’t be afraid that others will consider you overly arrogant. Talking about your youth sports achievements or your attempt to learn Spanish on your own will only help others get to know and understand you better.
  4. Don't be afraid to leave your comfort zone. This rule applies to both work and personal life. Sometimes you need to do what scares you the most - ask your boss for a promotion, be the first to start a conversation with someone you're interested in, volunteer to organize a party, and more. Even if such undertakings do not always end with the desired result, you can undoubtedly use them to attract positive attention to yourself.
  5. Make your life more fulfilling. Most of us know only work and home, we have few hobbies and are almost not interested in anything. It is not surprising that such people are perceived as mediocre. If you have caught yourself that your life is becoming more and more gray and monotonous every day, then it’s time to return bright colors to it. Try to get carried away with something, find new friends, go on a trip. New experiences will make your eyes glow, which will be instantly noticed by the people around you.
  6. Don't be afraid to seem stupid. If you try to keep a low profile and don't want to attract unnecessary attention to yourself for fear of saying something inappropriate, then you are wrong. People will instantly open up to you if you stop avoiding them. In this case, your knowledge or communication skills will play virtually no role.
  7. Be friendly. If you want to form a positive opinion of yourself among others, then try to be as open as possible when communicating with other people. Your friendliness will be immediately noticed and appreciated. Remember that positive and open people achieve much more in life than gloomy and withdrawn people, no matter how talented they actually are.

Rules of etiquette

For men and women, the general rules of etiquette are somewhat different.

For men

The image of a well-mannered young man consists not only of the ability to behave well towards a woman. Opening the door for a lady, letting her pass in front of you, or helping her carry a heavy bag is, of course, good, but the rules of etiquette for men do not end there. Polite speech, culture of behavior, a well-chosen suit and much more are also an integral part.

There are 14 basic rules of conduct for men towards women that every self-respecting modern young man should know:

  1. On the street, a young man must accompany a lady, walking to her left. Only military personnel have the right to walk on the right side to salute if necessary.
  2. If a girl stumbles or slips, the man must hold her by the elbow. Although in real circumstances the choice remains with the lady.
  3. Good manners do not allow you to light a cigarette in front of a lady, only after her consent.
  4. A real man always lets a lady pass first, having first opened the door for her.
  5. When going up or down the steps, the young man is obliged to support his companion if necessary, for this he is a couple of steps away from her.
  6. When entering an elevator, a man must enter first, and when exiting, let a girl pass first.
  7. The first to get out of the car is a young man who, walking around the car, opens the door on the passenger side, giving the lady his hand. If a man is a transport driver, then he is obliged to open the front passenger door and help the lady get in. In case the gentleman is also a passenger, he and his companion need to sit in the back seat. It should be remembered that in this case, the girl first gets into the car, and then the man sits next to her.
  8. When entering a room, a man helps a lady take off her coat, and when leaving it, he must help her put it on.
  9. In the modern world, a young man is not supposed to find a seat for himself if a woman is standing.
  10. According to etiquette, a young man needs to arrive at a meeting before a lady, so as not to put her in an uncomfortable situation if he is late. In emergency cases, you should notify the girl about this and apologize to her.
  11. A man must help each woman carry large bags or any bulky items. These do not include a woman's handbag, as well as small fur coats and coats, unless the lady is unable to carry her things herself due to her health.
  12. The main mistake a young man makes when communicating with someone is crossing his arms, as well as fiddling with something in his hands. This is considered a sign of disrespect for the opponent.
  13. When going to a restaurant, the gentleman comes in first so that the head waiter can make the right conclusions about who invited whom and who will pay the bill. If there are a large number of people, the first one to enter is the one who will pay and is the initiator of the invitation.
  14. While in company, a young man is forbidden to talk about frank topics in front of a girl; it is better to choose light, unobtrusive subjects for discussion.

For women

There is a certain set of rules that will help avoid awkward moments in life situations that every girl finds herself in every day.

  1. When you meet someone you know on the street, be sure to greet him. Consider the closeness of your relationship. You shouldn’t show excessive emotions too loudly and violently or try to call out to a friend across the street, just meet your eyes and nod to each other.
  2. Avoid on-the-go snacking outside. Firstly, there is a high probability of choking, and secondly, you may accidentally stain a random passerby. This also applies to eating in shops or other public places not intended for this purpose.
  3. When talking on the phone, be careful not to make your voice too loud. If this is not possible, move away from the main crowd - your negotiations should not be public.
  4. Do not sort things out in public if you do not want to receive condemnation from others. You shouldn't kiss your boyfriend passionately either.
  5. Don't get into arguments with strangers. If you have been reprimanded, even unfairly, it is better to apologize or remain silent. Remember that you are a real lady.
  6. Try not to be late for meetings and arrive on time if you are invited to visit. Punctuality is an elementary rule of decency that any woman must observe. If, despite everything, you realize that you won’t make it in time, be sure to call in advance and let them know how long you will be delayed.
  7. Watch your posture and gestures during a conversation. Your movements should be restrained, smooth, feminine, and should not attract attention or shock.
  8. The girl's makeup must match the situation. During the day and for work, it is better to choose neutral decorative cosmetics in natural tones, but for an evening social event you can apply bright lipstick and eye shadow with glitter.
  9. A trip to a restaurant begins with studying the menu and placing an order. Don’t be afraid to ask the waiter, for example, about the ingredients, serving method, and cooking time.
  10. If the waiter brings your order earlier than others, do not immediately grab the fork and knife. In this case, you need to wait until everyone has plates on the table.
  11. Defiant behavior always repels others, especially men, at any stage of relationship development. Remember that a woman should always remain a mystery and understatement, so you should not violently express your emotions - do not forget about restraint.
  12. Don't be too intrusive. Even if the relationship is going through a “candy-bouquet” period, you should not often call or write messages to your partner. Only one call from a woman should be every three to four calls from a man.
  13. You shouldn’t be too indifferent and arrogant a girl either. This will be perceived as disrespectful and will put off a potential partner.
  14. Be happy to let a man look after you, but don’t wait or demand that, for example, they open the door or give you flowers.

For children

By teaching children etiquette and giving them a set of guiding principles, we are actually equipping them with the tools to help them be heard, develop their confidence in their own abilities, and set them up for future success.

So, here is a list of etiquette rules that parents should teach their children.

  1. Greet the person by name, and if you don't know their name, ask. Greeting them by name is a sign of respect that tells the person that you value them. Therefore, it is important to teach children to always greet adults by name and patronymic or ask if they do not know their name.
  2. Never be afraid to ask again if you have forgotten the name of the person you are talking to: people understand that sometimes children can forget names. Everyone does it. In this case, the phrase: “Sorry, I can’t remember your name, could you remind me of it?” is quite acceptable.
  3. Try to look your interlocutor in the eyes: looking into a person’s eyes while communicating with him is useful not only for children, but also for adults. Also, teach children not to be distracted; otherwise, the interlocutor will receive a signal that you are not interested in him. Looking into the eyes is a simple but effective way to help children win the heart of every adult they meet along the way. Of course, if such eye contact is typical for a given culture and social norms.
  4. Remembering details and actively listening: This is a simple rule of good manners, but it has a significant impact on how other people perceive you. Remembering names and specific details (such as illness or recent return from vacation) suggests care and respect.
  5. Be aware - stop and look around: children are often blissfully unaware of their surroundings. For them, one impulse replaces another. For example, you came to the zoo with your kids, and while you are looking at the elephants, they suddenly notice something interesting in another place. Without thinking for a second about what is around them, the kids run headlong and almost fall under the wheels of an elderly man's wheelchair, who begins to worry and get angry for obvious reasons.
  6. Red light, yellow light, green light: You may have noticed that teachers, swimming and soccer coaches, and many other adult mentors in your children's lives use this valuable tool. By using the green light as permission to “go,” the yellow light to “slow down,” and the red light to “stop,” you can control children’s movements and movements without raising your voice. Start using this method as early as possible and introduce it to your kids as a game. Soon, with practice, they will become very good at determining when they can “go,” when they should “slow down,” and when they should “stop.”
  7. Keep your hands away from the glass: this rule may seem a little funny. Teach your children not to touch glass surfaces with their hands, especially dirty ones, so that they do not leave stains, and your dance teacher, store owner, librarian, doctor and many other people will be very grateful to you.
  8. Eating off someone else's plate - even mom's plate - is a bad idea: Some families play a game where you can "steal" food from each other's plates. It can be very funny and acceptable at home when the whole family participates and enjoys the game, but it stops being funny when it involves someone who doesn't understand this kind of joke. Eating food from another person's plate is unacceptable. It is much better to politely ask for more, even if mom or dad has to help the child get it from their plate.
  9. Napkin on lap, elbows off table: These days, these etiquette rules are considered old-fashioned and many people take them a little casually. However, since different families have different traditions, children should be taught these table manners so that they remain on top in any situation.
  10. Don't reach for anything. An old but true rule. Etiquette rules do not allow you to reach across the table for anything. Every parent knows how frustrating it is when a child tips over a glass and spills its contents on the dinner table. In order not to spill tea on your neighbor's lap and not make everyone sitting at the table nervous, you need to politely ask them to give you what you want.
  11. When talking to adults, wait to be addressed: this is a rather old-fashioned rule that has lost its appeal in recent decades. However, in today's technological world, where it is difficult to tell when an adult is busy, it is actually very important that children do not interrupt a person when he is speaking.
  12. Watch your words: previously bullying and harassment (bullying) only happened in person. Most parents teach their children that it is important to show kindness in personal interactions with people because bullying is unacceptable. However, mean comments and insults have now moved into cyberspace and are often beyond the control of adults. Make every effort to make children understand that words can hurt another person.

How to behave in society?

The rules of etiquette, also known as the basic rules of respect and politeness, work both ways. You show them towards another person, he shows them towards you.

This way everyone wins. But there are several nuances that are worth recalling and clarifying for every self-respecting person:

  1. Never come to visit without calling. If you are visited without warning, you can afford to wear a robe and curlers.
  2. Whoever you are - a director, an academician, an elderly woman or a schoolboy - when entering the room, say hello first.
  3. Handshake: It is not customary to shake hands with women, but if she extends her hand to a man first, she should shake it, but not as firmly as men.
  4. Rules for paying for an order in a restaurant: if you say the phrase “I invite you,” this means you pay. If a woman invites a business partner to a restaurant, she pays. Another formulation: “Let’s go to a restaurant,” - in this case, everyone pays for themselves, and only if the man himself offers to pay for the woman, can she agree.
  5. The umbrella is never dried open - neither in the office nor at a party. It needs to be folded and placed in a special stand or hung.
  6. The bag should not be placed on your lap or on your chair. A small elegant clutch bag can be placed on the table, a large bag can be hung on the back of a chair or placed on the floor if there is no special chair (these are often served in restaurants). The briefcase is placed on the floor.
  7. The golden rule when using perfume is moderation. If in the evening you smell your own perfume, know that everyone else has already suffocated.
  8. If you are walking with someone and your companion says hello to a stranger, you should say hello too.
  9. Cellophane bags are only acceptable when returning from the supermarket, as are paper branded bags from boutiques. Carrying them with you later as a bag is redneck.
  10. A man never carries a woman's bag. And he takes a woman’s coat only to carry it to the locker room.
  11. Home clothes are trousers and a sweater, comfortable but decent looking. The robe and pajamas are designed to go to the bathroom in the morning, and from the bathroom to the bedroom in the evening.
  12. From the moment your child settles in a separate room, learn to knock when entering his room. Then he will do the same before entering your bedroom.
  13. The man always enters the elevator first, but the one closest to the door exits first.
  14. In a car, the most prestigious place is considered to be behind the driver, a woman occupies it, a man sits next to her, and when he gets out of the car, he holds the door and gives the lady his hand. If a man is driving, it is also preferable for a woman to take a seat behind him. However, no matter where the woman sits, the man must open the door for her and help her out.
  15. Talking publicly about the fact that you are on a diet is bad form. Moreover, under this pretext one cannot refuse dishes offered by a hospitable hostess. Be sure to praise her culinary talents, while you don't have to eat anything. The same should be done with alcohol. Don't tell everyone why you can't drink. Ask for dry white wine and sip lightly.
  16. Taboo topics for small talk: politics, religion, health, money.
  17. Every person over 12 years of age must be addressed as “you.” It’s disgusting to hear people say “you” to waiters or drivers. Even to those people with whom you know well, it is better to address them as “you” in the office, but only as “you” in private. The exception is if you are peers or close friends.

Business Etiquette

Below are the main characteristics of business communication etiquette. By following them, a person will be able to inspire confidence in himself and climb up the career ladder in a relatively short period of time.

These norms cannot be discarded or pretended that they do not exist at all. Business etiquette involves certain rules that cannot be ignored. Let's take a closer look at them.

  1. Politeness
    The etiquette of business interaction implies that the interlocutor must be addressed with emphatic politeness. Even if you are talking with someone who is obviously unpleasant to you, you should not show your true attitude. Politeness is an integral part of business communication etiquette. It is difficult to imagine the head of a serious enterprise who would be highly emotional and impressionable. Etiquette teaches you to restrain your emotions and suppress them at the right moment. Otherwise, a person simply will not be able to fully manage a team and monitor the work of other people.
  2. Control of emotions
    The etiquette of business interaction suggests that demonstrating your emotions in front of people is unacceptable. In the presence of business partners or colleagues, you should not show fears, doubts, or uncertainty. All this has no place in the world of business or even just in the workplace. Otherwise, a person will never be able to feel protected, but will become vulnerable to any jokes, gossip and gossip from those around him. It is unlikely that anyone would want to become the subject of negative discussions or acquire a reputation as an unrestrained, ill-mannered person. Controlling emotions allows you to avoid unnecessary questions, maintain your own reputation and gain the respect of colleagues, subordinates and superiors for yourself.
  3. Punctuality
    You should arrive on time to any meeting. Whatever the subject of discussion concerns, whatever aspects it touches on, the time of arrival at the place of negotiations must be strictly observed. It is better to arrive ten to fifteen minutes earlier than to be late and make everyone wait for you alone. Being late means showing disrespect for business partners who have gathered in a specific place to discuss important issues.
  4. Confidentiality of information
    Business interaction etiquette implies that all available information that is of undeniable importance should not be disclosed to third parties. Outsiders should not have anything to do with what is happening at all and should not know any details of the business transactions taking place. Data confidentiality helps make the process of business cooperation as convenient and mutually beneficial as possible. If you do not pay enough attention to the issue of business etiquette, you can find yourself in a very awkward and difficult situation.
  5. Speech control
    Business etiquette means that you need to think carefully about your speech. Before saying anything out loud, it is better to make sure that the chosen phrases and their meaning are correct. Speech control allows you to achieve a positive effect in negotiations and avoid awkward situations that may accidentally arise under the influence of emotions.

Etiquette in public transport

According to statistics, we spend on average an hour a day in transport. Someone is pushing, someone is smelling perfume, and someone is leaning on your leg with an umbrella-cane half the time. And there is nothing pleasant about such trips.

To make life easier for each other and make daily “travels” more enjoyable, you should follow simple rules of etiquette:

  1. Has the carriage arrived? No need to break down doors, let people leave and then just come in. Don't push small children forward so they can run in and sit down. On the one hand, this is ugly, on the other hand, they can simply be demolished by people leaving, especially during rush hour.
  2. If you want to help an elderly person (child, pregnant woman, visually impaired) board a vehicle, you must first ask whether they need it.
  3. When entering transport, you must remove backpacks and large bags from your shoulders so as not to cause inconvenience to other citizens. Even large handbags should be taken off the shoulder and kept at knee level.
  4. All seats in the metro, trolleybuses, and trams are intended for older people, people with disabilities, expectant mothers and passengers with small children. If these people are sitting and there are still empty seats, then women are allowed to take them.
  5. If a man is on public transport with a companion, then he must thank the one who gave up his seat to her.
  6. It is better to give up your seat after making visual contact. This will help you understand whether a person needs such courtesy. You shouldn’t stand up silently and show a person to your place. You should say the phrase: “Please sit down.”
  7. It's not nice to look at your neighbor's book or phone number. Look closely at the passengers too.
  8. Many people do not tolerate strong odors well, so if possible, you should not pour a bottle of perfume on yourself and get on public transport after you have dined on a spicy burrito with garlic - use chewing gum.
  9. Sitting with your legs spread wide or stretched across the entire aisle is not beautiful - you are taking away space from people.

Culture of behavior

in public places

Teacher of MAOU Secondary School No. 33 with UIOP Yudkina L.I.

Goals : Development of students’ skills to behave in accordance with moral standards, rules of conduct, and rules of etiquette.

The problem of culture of behavior in public places remains relevant today. We often do not think that this or that situation requires a certain action, movement, phrase or gesture. The problem is that many people do not know these rules. This is understandable - it is difficult to remember all the rules of etiquette. Therefore, we want to voice at least some of them. The priority goal of etiquette is to make our lives as pleasant and safe as possible when communicating with each other, to smooth out all possible rough edges and unexpected offenses, and to warn us against accidental claims and troubles.

Story

The term “etiquette” (from the French etiquette) means the form, manner of behavior, rules of courtesy and politeness accepted in a particular society. Etiquette is a combination of formal rules of behavior in predetermined situations with common sense, the rationality of the content embedded in them.

The word "etiquette" became commonly used in the 17th century. Once, at a court reception during the reign of the French king Louis XIV, the guests were given cards that listed some acceptable rules of behavior. The word “etiquette” came from their French name, and later it entered the languages ​​of many countries. Rules of conduct arose a long time ago. As soon as people began to live together, the need for peaceful coexistence arose. Thus, in Homer’s “Odyssey”, in Egyptian and Roman manuscripts, the rules of good manners are already mentioned.

Relations between the sexes, superiors and subordinates, means of communication, and the reception of strangers were strictly regulated. Violation of these rules entailed exclusion from the social group. The ancient Greeks attached great importance to interstate relations; they actively developed diplomatic etiquette, creating a complex chain of necessary rituals. Then court etiquette arose. Each ruling dynasty created an elaborate ceremony around itself with a certain degree of solemnity. On the basis of court etiquette, only in a simpler form, general civil etiquette is formed.

So, etiquette began to take shape in ancient times, but it was during the Middle Ages that it acquired the features that we know today. In the 11th century, a social system of chivalry emerged, which subsequently spread throughout Europe. Chivalry had a huge impact on European etiquette and created countless new rituals and ceremonies around the feudal aristocracy. Etiquette in Western European countries developed under the great influence of local national customs and traditions. Thus, etiquette is a very large and important part of universal human culture, morality, morality. It has been developed over many centuries. There are practically no people who have not made their contribution to the world treasury of etiquette.

Many modern rules of behavior initially had a completely different meaning when they arose (as a rule, they originate from all sorts of rituals that permeated the life of ancient man). Some etiquette norms of the past have changed in such a way that it is difficult to trace their historical roots. Others simply disappeared, just as the phenomena that gave birth to them disappeared, but, one way or another, all the accepted rituals of behavior left their mark on the development of etiquette. It is believed that modern etiquette inherits the best customs of the past, the behavioral traditions of all peoples. But! One should remember the well-known relativity of etiquette requirements; they are not absolute: the conditions for their observance depend on the place, time, and circumstances. It often happens that behavior that is not acceptable in one place and under some circumstances may be quite appropriate in other conditions.

Let's remember why a man should walk down the street to the left of a woman. Just two or three hundred years ago, men had the rule of carrying a weapon on their left side - a saber, sword or dagger. To prevent this weapon from touching the woman, if she was nearby, they stood to her left. Now such an obstacle when walking with a lady is possible only among the military. But the custom, nevertheless, was preserved for everyone.

There are customs whose origin is almost impossible to find out. They, as they say, pass from generation to generation. But if they have been preserved unchanged, then it is hardly worth challenging the folk wisdom, thanks to which they were preserved. The most honored guests are given seats in the middle of the table, next to the hosts or opposite them. The owners always enter the house or apartment first, and then the guests, if they come together.

So, etiquette is a very large and important part of universal human culture, morality, morality. It has been developed over many centuries. There are practically no people who would not make their contribution to the world treasury of etiquette, albeit in accordance with their ideas about goodness, justice, and humanity.

But even the strictest adherence to faceless patterns of behavior is not the root of truly correct behavior; the main thing always remains a sincere, hospitable and kind attitude towards people. After all, if all the little details of etiquette are not supported by internal education and high morality, then it is unlikely that etiquette will be of much benefit to the people around us.

Rules of behavior in public places

Public places.Today you can rarely see a picture where, standing near an open door, two people persuade each other: “Please come in” - “No, please, you come in.” Usually, when we are allowed to go ahead, we go through without unnecessary ceremony. And, in principle, this is correct. Traditionally, the man lets the woman pass first; the younger one gives way to the older one; subordinate to the boss. Of two people of equal age occupying the same position, the one closest to the door passes first.

If you brought a guest to your house.The hostess enters first, followed by the guest. If the owner is a man, the guest enters first. Well, what if he doesn’t know the way or it’s dark outside the door? In this case, the owner enters first, saying: “Let me show you around” or: “Please follow me.” The same should be done if the guest is a woman.

Ladder. Previously, it was customary for a man, when going up the stairs with a woman, to walk in front of her. At present, a slightly different order has been determined: it is advisable and therefore justified for a man to strive to get ahead of a lady only in cases where the stairs are dark, steep or shaky. If circumstances are different, the woman leads the way. When descending, the man goes first, followed by the woman. If someone politely gives way to you as they pass by, either bow slightly or say, “Thank you.” If you are on a narrow staircase and an elderly person, a boss or a lady is walking towards you, you need to pause and take a small step to the side, allowing the person coming to pass.

When a man and a woman walking in different directions collide on the stairs, the woman is not obliged to move away from the railing, even if this is contrary to the rule of “right-hand traffic”; the sides of the stairs with the railing are the privilege of the weaker sex, the elderly and children.

Elevators, escalators.An elevator is the same “public area” as a street or stairs; here you don’t have to take off your hat. In the elevator, as in any other place, we greet those whom we always greet. In a crowded public elevator, a man does not take off his hat, even if he is accompanying a woman. In the elevator of a residential building or residential hotel, he would probably take off his hat when a woman entered, if his hands were not occupied with packages.

In automatic elevators, a woman, if she is traveling without an escort, presses the desired button herself. A man in an elevator, if he is standing close to the panel, asks the others (primarily women) which floor they need and presses the buttons. In full elevators, well-mannered people step aside or step out for a while to allow those standing behind to exit.

Shop. At the doors of a store or institution, first let those leaving, and only then enter yourself, this way you will not cause a “traffic jam” to form inside the room. In large stores or other mass service establishments, a man may not take off his headdress. However, where the client is being served individually, it is useful not to forget to take off your hat and say hello to the person who will be dealing with you. When making a purchase in a store, it is worth remembering not to tire the seller with petty whims or prolonged indecision.

When approaching the checkout, you need to have an approximate amount of money ready for the purchase, and not look for it in your wallet or pockets at the last moment.

Cafes and restaurants.The man enters the restaurant first. There are several reasons for this. Firstly, this is how he protects his companion from unexpected collisions and warns her about steps or a threshold, while not forgetting to hold the door and give the lady his hand. Secondly, based on this criterion, the head waiter has the right to draw a conclusion about who is the initiator of coming to the restaurant, i.e., who will place the order and pay the bill.

In the wardrobe, the man undresses and then helps the lady undress. Having chosen a table, the man, slightly pulling out the chair, helps the lady sit down. If a lady arrives without a companion, this gallant duty is assigned to the attendants. Never get into an argument with a waiter. The proposal to leave the restaurant must come from the initiator of the meeting. Etiquette rules do not allow the waiter to bring you the bill until you ask him to do so. But under no circumstances ask for the bill while your guests or your lady is still eating - this is rude to them. Money, credit or bonus cards should be placed in a folder or on a tray along with the bill and left on the edge of the table. Tipping is a tradition in restaurants almost all over the world. The minimum tip is 10% of the bill.

Transport. Before entering the vehicle, give the opportunity to exit it. Stand so as not to disturb exiting passengers. When traveling on public transport with a lady, the man enters after her, but gets out first and offers his hand to his companion. Usually everyone pays for the fare themselves, but a man, on his own initiative, can pay for the fare of his good friend. Decency obliges him to give way to a tired mother with a small or infant child, a pregnant woman, an old man or a disabled person, a woman with a heavy bag or an acquaintance. In relation to young, healthy strangers, such a gesture is voluntary politeness. The woman who was given her seat should immediately thank her for this. A young girl can give way to an elderly relative. You should not talk loudly in public transport, laugh, or play music. It is absolutely unacceptable to be in transport with ice cream or an open bottle. You cannot stand in the doorway, interfering with the entry and exit of other passengers. If you cannot hand over money for travel or validate a ticket yourself, ask others to do it. It is indecent to look over your shoulder at a book, newspaper or magazine that another passenger is reading. It is indecent to stare at your fellow travelers. In transport, you should try not to step on people’s feet, not to lean on the person standing next to you, and not to push him in the back. If one of the passengers accidentally touched another, you must apologize. When exiting a vehicle, a man must get out first and then help his companion.

Conversation. Boys or girls over 18 years of age should be addressed as “you.” It is also important to control your voice, because it may well reveal your well-being, mood, thoughts that you would like to hide. Speech should not be too loud, otherwise you may embarrass yourself.

Good manners require that we avoid conversations that are unpleasant to the interlocutor or that make him despondent. To become a conversational ace, first of all, you need to learn several rules: in a conversation you need to avoid loud “I”; consider the interests of others and hide one's own identity. It is very indecent to speak to someone in a language unfamiliar to the rest of society. You should show courtesy and delicacy if a third opponent intervenes in your conversation, and the topic of the conversation is purely intimate.

It is also important to control your voice (you can resort to the help of a specialist), because it may well reveal your well-being, mood, thoughts that you would like to hide. In a state of stress, it is even harder to speak, rapid intermittent breathing and trembling in the voice interfere, so it is also important to control your breathing.

Think about it, do you speak quickly? If so, how clearly? Clear? Okay, but do you know how to correctly place pauses in a conversation? Why are pauses needed? It's very simple - pauses are a sign of good manners. Pauses should be long enough for your interlocutors to think about what was said. If you speak slowly and don't pause, you risk boring the other person. Every word in a conversation should be distinct and understandable to the interlocutor.

In society they talk about everything, but do not delve into the issues, do not analyze any subject comprehensively, but discuss briefly, but not superficially. You should not show that the conversation is boring or tires you, or that you would like to talk with others, you should not look in the other direction during a conversation or look at your watch, your hands should be in a calm state, and it is not permissible to twirl objects.

Remember that in any society your behavior should be natural. Pretense is the enemy of any engaging conversation. In order to feel easy and at ease when communicating with strangers, in order to start a conversation without effort and freely conduct it (and not just assent), certain preparation is necessary.

What to talk about with a person you don’t know well when mutual silence becomes uncomfortable? That's right - about the weather! This is a topic that interests everyone to one degree or another, it is safe and conflict-free. Uninteresting? It's right. But it’s not at all necessary to start talking about something serious right away. This may seem pretentious.

In a conversation, it is better not to touch upon personal problems, not to persuade your partner to do so, and not to talk confidentially about yourself. When the weather topic is exhausted, you can talk, for example, about television, newspaper news, sports. In the end, there will definitely be a question that can captivate both interlocutors. You should be careful when using different variations of words from youth slang.

Know how to listen! Do you know how? But as? Be silent, looking at your interlocutor with “empty eyes” that reflect your own concerns. This is not the same at all! You should look at the interlocutor with interest and from time to time insert some comments that will indicate that you understand what is being said. While someone is talking to you, it is ugly to rummage in your bag, rummage through your own pockets, glance at the TV, catch your heavenly beauty in the mirror opposite. If you have already heard the story once, it is better to immediately say: “I know, I heard it,” than to interrupt in mid-sentence in impatience. A polite person rarely interrupts someone else's story, even if he has heard it a good hundred times.

In a friendly discussion there is no place, for example, for such expressions: “It’s not true!”, “What?!”, “I won’t understand you!” After all, you can say the same thing in a different way: “But it seems to me that...”, “Sorry, I didn’t hear...”,

Don't interrupt when someone is speaking, especially if they are elderly. Don't correct someone's mispronounced foreign word. You should not suggest words to the narrator, finish his sentence for him, and, especially, correct stylistic errors out loud.

In general, try not to make any comments to adults. Young people can sometimes afford this among themselves, but only in a friendly manner.

Address and greetingAccording to etiquette, you need to greet a person with the words: “Hello!” "Good morning!" "Good afternoon!" "Good evening!" When greeting, you should not lower your eyes; you need to meet the gaze of the person you are greeting. But the persistent gaze of someone else is felt by a person even if he is sitting with his side or back to you. Therefore, you should not “hypnotize” anyone. It is considered indecent to stare at a person while he is eating, to gaze at unfamiliar women for a long time, or to look at the person being introduced to you. Intonation is very important. A greeting expressed in a rude or dry tone may offend the person you are greeting. You need to greet people warmly and friendly. And adding a smile to your greeting will improve your overall mood. And don’t forget about a bow, a nod of the head, a handshake, a hug, a kiss on the hand - choose any one based on the circumstances. Only the closest friends are addressed as "you".

Everyone else (older people, unfamiliar peers) is addressed as “you.” It is not customary to say hello across a threshold, across a table, or through any partition. A handshake is a traditional, symbolic greeting gesture. Give your hand with a free, confident gesture. The squeeze should be short.

But you also shouldn’t shake your partner’s hand with all your might, shaking it in the air several times. If you notice an acquaintance in the distance and if you are also noticed, then you need to greet the acquaintance with a nod of the head, a wave of the hand, a bow, a smile. You shouldn't shout at the top of your voice! If you see a friend approaching you, there is no need to shout “hello!” from afar.

Wait until the distance between you is reduced to a few steps. You definitely need to greet those people you often meet, even if you don’t know them, for example, the salesperson at the nearest store, the postman, or neighbors from the front door.

Telephone The advantages of a mobile phone cannot be overestimated. And yet, in certain situations it can create inconvenience and even cause annoyance. With a phone in your pocket you can be in a public place, in a restaurant, in a hairdresser; but in a cinema, a theatre, or during a concert, it will be an undoubted nuisance - in such places you need to turn it off completely or turn on vibration instead of a sound signal.

School behavior culture

Goals : Development of students’ abilities to behave in accordance with moral standards, rules of behavior, rules of etiquette, prevention of controversial situations among students, prevention of conflict situations between teachers and students.

Task : Development of students' communication abilities.

Teacher's introduction

A person lives among people from his very birth. Among them, he takes his first steps and speaks his first words, develops and reveals his abilities. Only human society can become the basis for the development of personality, for the development of the “I” of each person. And such a society can become not only a large association of people, but also a small group - a school class. What is a class? A class is an association of people, where everyone’s “I” turns into a common “we”. And it is necessary for each individual “I” to feel comfortable in this big “we”. And so that the “I” of each does not suppress the “I” of his neighbor. To do this, it is necessary to have certain rules of behavior that would give each “I” the opportunity to fully develop.

Let's count how many people we meet every day. At home we communicate with our relatives: mom, dad, brothers and sisters, neighbors; at school - with teachers, schoolmates, librarian; in the store - with the seller, cashiers, strangers; on the street - with passers-by; old and young people, adults and peers. It's hard to count how many people you see in one day; You’ll just say hello to some, you’ll talk to others, you’ll play with others, you’ll answer a question with others, you’ll turn to someone yourself with a request. Every person is in constant communication with familiar and unfamiliar people at home, at school, on the street, in a store, at the cinema, in the library, etc. We all know that another person’s behavior, a friendly or rude word often leaves a mark on the soul for the whole day. Often, a person’s good mood depends on whether they paid attention to him, whether they were friendly and kind when communicating with him, and how offensive it can be from inattention, rudeness, or an evil word. You and I spend a lot of time at school, so today we will talk about the rules of behavior at school, as well as about moments of disrespectful attitude, that is, one after which grievances arise. As a rule, the grievances are mutual.

Unfortunately, not all school groups adhere to the rules of politeness, friendliness, and delicacy. We need to think about our mistakes in behavior. An even, friendly tone, attention to each other, and mutual support strengthen relationships. And vice versa, unceremoniousness or rude treatment, tactlessness, offensive nicknames, nicknames hurt painfully and sharply worsen your well-being. Some people think that all these are trifles, trifles. However, harsh words are not harmless. It is not for nothing that people have composed wise sayings about the role of words in human relationships: “One word can lead to a quarrel forever,” “A razor scrapes, but a word hurts,” “A kind word is a spring day.”

What do you think the word “polite” (observing the rules of decency) means?

Exercise

Name the signs of a well-mannered person.

The personality traits of a well-mannered person are discussed. Rules of behavior are developed.

Rules:

  • Politeness, goodwill, friendliness in relationships are mutual. Develop such qualities in yourself.
  • Do not allow quarrels, fights, swearing, shouting, threats. This humiliates a person.
  • Treasure your honor, the honor of your family, school, keep your comrades from doing bad things.
  • Help the younger, the vulnerable, be fair.
  • Treat others the way you would like them to treat you

The interactive whiteboard contains a table with two columns. The beginnings of popular sayings are written on the left side. On the right side is the end of the proverb. It is necessary to match the beginnings and endings by dragging the phrases on the right side into the corresponding lines.

Compose two parts of a proverb about the culture of behavior:

The meaning of each statement is discussed.

Talk about the rules of conduct on the topic.

Themes :

School etiquette (appearance, speech within school walls, politeness)

Rules of behavior at school

Duties of the Duty Class

Hints

Form

Changeable hairstyle or second shoes

Greeting students and adults

Addressing each other

Garbage

Thrift

Politeness

Lateness

Truancy

Players and cell phones

Everyday speech at school

Communication style

Other people's things

Behavior in the dining room

Behavior during lines and events

Arrival at school

Skipping classes

School property

Compliance with safety rules

Caring for the younger and weaker

Resolving controversial issues

Smoking at school

Behavior in class

Behavior during recess

Using obscene language

Responsibilities of the senior school officer

Duties of the Duty Class

Behavior at school parties and discos

Summarizing. Final word.

How to learn “knowledge”? Until the 16th century, the word “vezha” was widely used in the Russian language, i.e. a person who knows how to behave in a given situation. To learn “knowledge” there are several techniques.

Introspection The reception is complicated. It's like you need to split into two. You live and do everything as usual, and at the same time you observe yourself through the eyes of another person. Every time you set a goal for yourself. For example, today – “manners”. Another time the goals will be different: how do I talk to people? How do I say hello? How do I behave when visiting? Note not only your shortcomings, but also your good traits, qualities, and habits.

Self-esteem You must not only take care of yourself, but also give an honest assessment, without any discounts. In the evening, when you go to bed, you can remember how the day went, what you noticed about yourself and tell yourself directly. A diary would be very helpful with this, reflecting thoughts about yourself, about the people around you, and assessments of yourself.

Studying other people's opinionsNo matter how honestly you try to evaluate yourself, there is always a danger of making a mistake; much is much better seen from the outside. Therefore, it is very important to know what others think of you.

Self-knowledge and observation of the behavior of others also helps. One ancient eastern sage was asked: “Who did you learn good manners from?” “The ill-mannered ones,” he answered, “I avoided doing what they do.”

So, the first condition for good manners is knowledge of generally accepted norms and rules of behavior; second, practice practicing correct behavior; third - strong and stable habits of behavior.

“Treasury of Folk Wisdom”

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INTRODUCTION

The culture of human behavior is the external expression of his spiritual wealth and ability to communicate with people. The rules governing human behavior in society have been created over many centuries. They arose in connection with the need to streamline the communication of people, to make it more organized, pleasant and beautiful.

Often a person's upbringing is judged only by his manners. But it is not just the external attributes of good manners that distinguish a cultured person.

RULES OF CONDUCT IN PUBLIC PLACES

1.On the street.

On the street you must follow generally accepted rules of behavior. Every time you leave the house, take a look at yourself to see if you need to clean your coat, suit, or shoes. No matter how we rush, we don’t fly, pushing aside the crowd, but we also don’t barely trudge, forcing passers-by to go around us.

A well-mannered person behaves on the street in such a way as to attract less attention from passers-by: he does not talk loudly or laugh, avoids misunderstandings, and does not get into a random altercation. The disgusting habit of spitting, throwing cigarette butts, seed husks and other garbage on the sidewalk.

A young man helps his companion carry a heavy package, a shopping bag with groceries. If you need to pass through a bridge, a narrow gate, along the side of the road, we let a woman, as well as people older than us, go ahead. If going first turns out to be somewhat unsafe (among puddles, in the dark, etc.), a man takes on this role, finding and paving the way.

Avoid eating anything outside. And of course, you cannot spray tobacco smoke on passers-by while walking along the sidewalk.

Walking arm-in-arm is considered a bit old-fashioned these days: it makes it difficult to move on crowded streets. In a slippery place, a young man can offer his hand to an older man or companion.

It is a common custom among young people to walk around hugging each other. The young man puts his hand on the girl’s shoulder, and she hugs him around the waist. It looks immodest.

Accidents are not uncommon in the city. We try not to increase the crowd of onlookers. We will help the old man carry his bag, we will carry the blind man across the street. One must be extremely sensitive to look closely at a person with any physical handicap.

Where possible, pedestrians should avoid walking against the flow of traffic. Give way to the oncoming passerby and go around him on the right side. If you notice that someone is in a hurry, step aside. Even in a very crowded place they do not push each other, but ask permission to pass. If the road is narrow and bad, then, if necessary, the man steps off the sidewalk onto the pavement. In narrow, cramped passages, as well as at stairs and doors, you should wait until those who are rightfully supposed to go first have passed.

An open umbrella is carried over the head so that water does not flow onto passers-by. When meeting other pedestrians, the umbrella is raised or tilted to the side.

An oncoming passerby on a narrow sidewalk is allowed to pass by stepping back (a younger person or a man). They don’t walk in a line on the street.

When you meet an acquaintance and start talking to him, do not stand in the middle of the sidewalk, move aside so as not to disturb other passers-by. When meeting someone older than you, do not stop them, but ask permission to accompany them. It is impolite to stop strangers or a friend if he is not walking alone. This can only be done as a last resort, of course, by apologizing and making sure that he is not in a hurry. If you are not walking alone and meet an acquaintance with whom you want to exchange a few phrases, do not forget to apologize to your companion. He, in turn, having greeted everyone, waits for you or walks away. However, it is not appropriate for a man to leave a woman alone. If you want to talk to someone you know, introduce him to your companion.

2.In public transport.

If a group of people has gathered waiting for transport, then those arriving should take their turn, and not stop in an uncertain position somewhere, and then, when boarding, rush to the doors of the car, pushing aside those who stood first.

When entering public transport, let disabled people, children, elderly people and women pass first. If necessary, provide them with assistance. If one door is used for entry and exit, then people are given the opportunity to exit first. The man gets out of the carriage first and helps his companion, the elderly or children. In the carriage, do not stop at the doors, but go forward, making room for other passengers. You cannot lounge on the seat and occupy it completely if it is designed for two. Bags can be placed on the seat only if there is no space and there are free seats. If there are no free seats, then they give up their seats to the elderly, sick, pregnant women, and people with small children. Both men and women, and especially young people, are required to do this. When giving way, you can say a few words, but you can also do it silently. If you are given a seat, then do not take it for granted, you need to thank for your attention. Both the man and the woman thank him if the place was given up to his companion. You can refuse the offered place. Then thank them for the service and briefly explain why you didn’t take advantage of the favor. We advise young people: give way to everyone who is older than you and your peers.

Young people staring out the window and trying not to notice an elderly man standing next to them is an unsightly picture. But when teaching etiquette to teenagers and children, adults themselves need to follow the rules of good manners. Parents should ensure that children do not soil the seats or clothes of other passengers with their feet. By the way, it is not necessary to sit down a child who is able to play all day long without getting tired. By yielding to his whim, we thereby confirm the child’s opinion of his exclusivity. Permissiveness is a sign of an egoist.

They do not eat or smoke on public transport. People do not enter the carriage with ice cream in their hands. It does not shake off snow or raindrops from clothes. Travel tickets and trash are not thrown on the floor. When sneezing and coughing, use a handkerchief. In the carriage they don’t tidy up their appearance, don’t clean their nails, don’t pick their teeth.

We try to stand steadily, without putting too much weight on other passengers when pushing or turning. Holding onto the handrails, we make sure that our elbows do not touch our neighbor, and that our hand does not loom in front of his face. If we see that our progress towards the exit will embarrass someone, we ask permission to pass, we inquire if the person is getting off at such and such a stop. If we receive an answer that it’s working out, we stop and calmly wait.

Transport is not a place for public debate. If we nevertheless have to enter into a conversation, and it is of a cocky nature, we remember that only a sense of humor can help in this case.

If we accidentally push someone, we ask for forgiveness. If we were pushed, in response to an apology we will say: “Nothing!” - or just smile in a friendly way.

It has become common to read on the go. But in transport, the newspaper is not completely unfolded, but read folded. It’s not very nice to look into your neighbor’s book and stare at the passengers. You should not talk about family or work matters, or eavesdrop on other people's conversations.

In a taxi, the driver is not reprimanded or asked to increase speed. If you are in a hurry, you can tell the driver about it, and he will take care of the rest. But you can ask him to slow down. When getting into a car, a man opens the door and lets a woman or an older man pass ahead. Women usually sit in the back and the man sits next to the driver.

3.In the store.

We go to stores every day to do shopping. Observance of mutual politeness here is the key to order and good relations between sellers and buyers.

Who must give way at the store door? Incoming. He gives the opportunity to leave the room, and then only enters himself, of course holding the doors so as not to hurt the people following him. Contact the seller politely, do not interrupt his conversation with the previous buyer.

Professional ethics requires the seller, in turn, to be extremely fair with customers. Sometimes sellers, talking among themselves, do not pay attention to the buyer and do not even answer their questions. This is the height of tactlessness and a direct violation of official duties. In such cases, politely but firmly demand attention to yourself. When the buyer approaches, the seller is obliged to interrupt other activities or, apologizing, ask to wait a little, say, if he is packing the goods. In turn, the buyer observes a number of immutable rules.

If you came to the store to see if the necessary goods were on sale, and you had the necessary money with you, you should not try on things that you do not intend to buy. It is better to ask the seller about everything that interests you, and not to force him to do meaningless work, and not to waste his time.

If you wanted to buy something, but couldn’t find anything suitable, don’t hesitate to tell the seller about it and thank him for his attention.

It’s not nice to try to buy something without waiting in line. Such attempts will inevitably meet with the just indignation of others. There are, however, circumstances when you can ask for food to be released without waiting in line (you are in a hurry to catch a train, a child or a sick person is left unattended at home). In this case, contact those in front, explaining the reason for your request. This is easier than asking those standing in line to buy something for you at the same time. Yes, this is not fair to those who stand behind. In addition, we put in an awkward position those to whom we made such a request: either they must refuse us, or do an ugly act towards other people and hear unflattering remarks from them about themselves.

4.In the theater, at a concert, in a museum and at an exhibition.

You can often see girls and boys in casual clothes at the theater and at concerts. This is explained by the fact that they came here from work. When going to the theater or concert, you should strive to dress beautifully in order to create a festive mood for yourself and the people around you.

Having let his companion through the door, the man goes into the hall first to find his place. If 2 pairs of acquaintances come to the theater or concert, women sit in the middle, and men on the edges. As you walk to your seats, try not to disturb the already seated spectators too much, and turn to face them. The man walks first along the narrow aisle between the rows and helps his companion sit down, lowering the seat of the chair. Try not to make noise, do not occupy both armrests of the chairs, and do not lean your hands or feet on the chairs in front. It is best not to be late for a performance or concert, but if this happens, go to the balcony or sit in the nearest free seat. You will find your place during the break. Programs and binoculars are held on the lap. It is indecent to look at others through binoculars during intermission. Talking (even in a whisper) during a show, movie or theatrical performance is not allowed, especially not to loudly comment on what is happening on stage. If you don’t like the play or movie, sit silently, and at the right moment (during a break between scenes, artists’ appearances) leave the hall. In the cinema hall, men and women remove their high hats so as not to interfere with the view of the screen to the spectators sitting behind them. Try not to sit in your chair, cough or sneeze. If you are sick, for example, with the flu, visiting public places is strictly prohibited.

Artists are thanked with applause, but musical works (symphonies, quartets, etc.) are not interrupted by applause. They usually applaud at the end of the movement (before intermission). At the end of the performance or concert, do not run to the cloakroom or to the exit: this will not save much time, but will only create confusion and spoil the impression of the spectacle and music.

Observe certain rules of conduct in museums and exhibitions. When moving around the hall, try not to interfere with those around you to concentrate their attention and enjoy the works of art. To do this, do not come too close to other visitors, do not block the paintings with your back, and do not talk loudly. And of course, you cannot touch the exhibits with your hands. In order not to dissipate the impression, it is useful to examine only those exhibits that are interesting to you. It makes no sense to quickly run through all the halls without highlighting individual paintings by some artist.

If you are exploring the halls accompanied by a guide, then listen to his explanations in silence, without moving too close to him so as not to disturb others. If you have questions, ask them after the story is over or during a pause. It is indecent to talk to your neighbors during an excursion.

Of course, it can be difficult to contain your emotions when viewing colorful works of art or fashion models. Some paintings touch you to the depths of your soul, while some objects in the exhibition simply outrage you. But still, try to be restrained, do not judge the work by the first impression. Often upon re-examination a different impression arises. In any case, refrain from making disparaging remarks about the paintings and the author. An intelligent person is modest and self-possessed. And a true connoisseur of art never shows his enthusiasm too noisily and does not flaunt his erudition in front of people.

5. INmovie.

You can go to the cinema during the day without preparing in advance - hence great freedom of action. If you did not take off your outerwear in the wardrobe, carefully, without touching your neighbor, place the coat on your lap.

If you have a furry hat, you need to take it off.

At festival premieres and various film festivals, rules of behavior apply, just like in a theatre, including applause during the screening and at the end of it.

At a regular movie show, you should follow the same rules as in the theater: do not make noise, arrive before the start of the show, take only your seats, walk if necessary facing those sitting, do not chew, do not litter, do not leave before the end of the show. You can leave the hall only if the film does not at all live up to your expectations, while trying not to disturb others.

6.INcafe.

Often, visiting a cafe or restaurant becomes a place for people where they can not only eat delicious food or meet friends, but also show off their knowledge of etiquette. Visiting and staying in a cafe or restaurant implies strict and strict adherence to all the rules of good manners: greetings, introductions, the ability to dress and behave in society, conduct a conversation, use cutlery, etc.

It is worth noting that today there are many types of establishments of this kind. These include eateries, well-appointed cafes, and high-class restaurants. The behavior of visitors is determined by the level of the catering establishment they visit. So, for example, a lady in an evening dress, a mink coat and earrings with diamonds in her ears looks inappropriate and ridiculous when she appears in an ice cream parlor. A person dressed in a tracksuit will look just as funny in the dining room of a VIP-class restaurant. Thus, before heading to this or that establishment, you should choose the right suit that would correspond to the level of the cafe or restaurant. However, it should be noted that there are general rules of conduct that a visitor to a cafe, restaurant, etc. must follow.

culture manners behavior social

If you intend to visit a restaurant with a large group, then there must be a man among you who will take on “organizational” functions: choose seats, order dishes, “pay the bill, etc. But this does not mean that women cannot go to a restaurant alone. Unfortunately, our reality is such that at the tables of cafes and restaurants today you can often see women sitting alone or coming without men. Moreover, these days, most often it is ladies who invite men to visit a restaurant or cafe, and this is not considered bad form.

A man should always remain helpful and gallant. If a man comes to a cafe or restaurant, accompanying a lady, then the rules of etiquette instruct him to open the door for the woman, who, having walked a little forward, must again let her gentleman go ahead of her. The man should walk in front of the woman, thus showing her the way to the dinner table.

All upscale cafes and restaurants have a lobby. The man must take off his outerwear first. This must be done in strict order: hat, gloves, coat. After this, the man must help his companion undress. Etiquette rules do not allow people to enter the dining room of a restaurant or cafe with large bags or wearing outerwear.

When leaving the hall, the man must also walk in front of the lady. He opens the doors for her, lets her go ahead, then goes out himself, closes the doors and again walks in front of his companion, as if showing the way to the lobby. According to the rules of etiquette, the man puts on his outerwear first, after which he helps his lady get dressed. Restaurant visitors go outside, and only after that the man can put on a hat and gloves.

If you plan to visit a restaurant or cafe that is very popular, it is best to book a table in advance. It is especially important to do this on the eve of a date or business dinner. If the table has not been booked, then the man will have to find a free table at all costs for himself and those he accompanies. When choosing a place, a woman should not turn around and turn her head in different directions. Choosing a table is the privilege of men. In such cases, it is best to seek help from the manager, who will prevent the occurrence of unpleasant situations and disputes between visitors vying for a free table.

A man who comes to a cafe or restaurant and accompanies a lady must give the latter a more comfortable place at a table, for example, overlooking the stage. The one who turns out to be helpful and attentive to his companion will be recognized as a true gentleman. Etiquette does not provide for strict regulations regarding how a man and woman who come together to a cafe or restaurant should sit - opposite each other or next to each other. However, it is believed that it is more convenient to sit diagonally: then the room can be clearly seen by your interlocutors.

The man must help his lady sit down at the table. He pulls out a chair from the table and then helps his companion move it. It should be noted that almost no one follows this old rule of etiquette today. Women usually take the initiative into their own hands: they independently choose a place at the table and sit on a chair. Another old rule of etiquette has also been forgotten. Nowadays, it is rare to see a man in a restaurant, much less a cafe, rising from his seat at the moment when a lady gets up. The rules of good manners say: a man should stand up a little if a lady has risen from the table. If several men are sitting at a table, they may not get up when a woman gets up.

According to the rules of etiquette, the man is responsible for choosing the menu. At the same time, he must offer his companion a choice of one or another dish indicated on the menu. In upscale restaurants, menus are provided for each visitor, and therefore both men and women can independently choose the food that they like, without risking limiting the freedom of choice of their companion. When choosing dishes, a woman should not choose too expensive or too cheap ones. It would also be considered inappropriate and impolite to say: “The same dish as yourself” or “Order what you want.”

If someone invites a friend to a restaurant for the first time, then the inviter should order dishes, focusing on his own taste preferences. If he ordered a hot dish, then the invitee should not order a cold appetizer for himself. If lunch or dinner in a restaurant is paid for by the inviter, then he can refuse to choose the dish that he does not like, but order it for everyone else. The invitee, of course, can politely ask the inviter to order his favorite dish. The main thing is that it is not overly expensive.

In the old days, only men were given the right to choose alcoholic drinks in a restaurant. It was to them that the waiters brought the wine list. Today the situation has changed. Both men and women can order alcoholic drinks. The waiter must present the wine to the person who ordered it. The visitor carefully examines the label, then the waiter pours a small amount of wine into the glass, the customer takes a sip to taste the wine. Only after receiving the seal of approval for the quality of wine or other alcoholic beverage does the restaurant hall employee fill the glasses. It is worth noting that tasting wine is of a conditional, ritual nature. Therefore, it is considered not quite decent to refuse the ordered alcohol, except in cases where the catering network provides poor-quality goods. A poorly chilled drink can also be a reason for refusing the ordered wine.

According to etiquette, lunch or dinner participants order the appetizer and main course together. The choice of dessert should be made only after the main course has been eaten. If the trip to the restaurant was planned in advance, and its participants previously discussed the dishes that they would order, then anyone can place the order. In such a situation, the orderer first lists the dishes that his companions would like to receive, and only then names those that he himself would like to try.

In those restaurants and cafes where food is served on a common large platter, each visitor puts in as much as he can eat. Alcoholic drinks, which in such establishments are served in jugs or decanters, are also poured into one’s own glass. In upscale restaurants, diners are served by a waiter. He transfers food from a common dish to the plate of everyone sitting at the table and pours wine. In the event that it is necessary to bring an additional portion, the visitor must place the fork and knife crosswise. Empty plates should be placed on the right side of the table. It is customary to serve food on the left side. Alcoholic drinks are also poured from the right side. When using the service of a waiter, you need to thank him every time. Nowadays, not only a man, as was customary in the past, but also a woman can say words of gratitude to the service staff of a cafe or restaurant. The end of the meal is signaled by cutlery placed parallel to each other on the plate. The waiter may ask the diners if they would like an additional portion. Guests can either politely decline or accept his offer to reorder. Waiters often ask visitors how much they liked the dishes they tried. Such a question may be official and does not require an answer. However, in some cases, they quite sincerely want to know whether their customers like the cuisine of the restaurant where they serve. Then the visitor needs to frankly address the question asked. However, even if you didn’t really like what you ate at this restaurant, try to restrain your emotions and politely indicate the reason for your indignation and dissatisfaction with this or that dish.

There are several more general rules of behavior in restaurants and cafes. When serving visitors, the waiter always starts with women. In high-end restaurants, the waiter also controls the timely change of ordered dishes. If a given restaurant does not provide such a service, then the responsibility for serving the lady falls on the shoulders of the gentleman. If bottles of alcohol are served in a bucket of ice, then the waiter must open them and pour the contents. Once the bottles are emptied, they should be placed next to the bucket.

While in a restaurant or cafe, you can meet acquaintances and friends. The general rules for greeting acquaintances in a restaurant are almost no different from the rules for greeting people on the street. However, there are some differences. If two friends meet in a restaurant or cafe, then, according to the rules of good manners, they should sit at the same table. If for some reason this cannot be done, then the person sitting at the table should get up, go up to a friend, greet him and apologize for the inability to talk and spend time together. In addition, in such a situation, the eldest acquaintance must decide whether to sit at the same table. Also, the eldest decides whether he himself should come up and greet a friend sitting in the hall, or wait until he is invited to greet him. It is unacceptable to approach and sit next to a person who occupies a high social or official position and is already sitting at a table. It's best to wait for an invitation. You can say hello to people sitting at tables in a cafe or restaurant and eating food, but you should not continue the conversation.

Smokers may have a question: is it possible to smoke in restaurants and cafes? In some of these establishments smoking is prohibited, as evidenced by the absence of ashtrays on the tables. But there are cafes and restaurants that allow their visitors to smoke. However, when lighting a cigarette, you should remember those around you. It is quite possible that among them there are people who cannot stand the smell of tobacco smoke. Therefore, before you smoke, ask permission from those sitting next to you. The rules of etiquette prohibit smoking between serving the next dish and in the event that one of the neighbors at the table is eating.

Paying the bill in a cafe or restaurant, contrary to the prevailing stereotype in Russia, can be paid by both a man and a woman. In addition, according to the rules of etiquette, the inviter must pay the bill in a restaurant or cafe. If a woman pays, she must do it herself, without entrusting the payment or handing over the wallet to the man. To pay the bill, the waiter is called with some kind of signal: a slight movement of the hand or a nod. There is no need to call the employee loudly.

In some restaurants, the bill for the ordered dishes is often brought on a small tray or plate. In this case, the visitor takes the bill, quickly and carefully examines it, then puts money into it and puts it back on the plate. You should not scrupulously calculate the cost of each meal eaten and then compare the results obtained with what is written on the bill. This is considered bad manners. In some restaurants and cafes, service is not included in the bill. Then the waiter’s work is assessed by adding 10% to the amount indicated on the bill. Sometimes the service is included in the bill. But even in this case, the change is left to the waiter. If a man has any complaints or questions regarding the amount of the bill to the service staff of a cafe or restaurant, then it is still not worth expressing them in front of a lady.

Tipping has become a good old tradition in restaurants all over the world. Giving a waiter or doorman an elegant tip is considered perhaps the pinnacle of restaurant etiquette. There is no need to talk about the existence of any tipping tariffs. The size of the tip may vary in different countries. It varies in each individual country. This may depend both on the degree of wealth of visitors, and on the level of comfort of the restaurant and the work of the service staff. Modern sages say that the lower tip limit is determined by the rules of etiquette, and the upper limit is determined by the intuition of the person from whom the tip is expected. Be that as it may, tips are one of the income items for restaurant or cafe workers. Not giving a tip means not paying for the work that was done for the visitor by waiters, cooks or cloakroom attendants.

It is worth noting that in Russia such a phenomenon as tipping has only recently acquired the status of semi-permitted. Once upon a time, not so long ago, taking tips to employees of catering establishments was strictly prohibited and was equated to bribery. Today everything has changed, and tips are perceived as gratitude from a visitor to a restaurant or cafe for the good or not so good work of the service staff. Today, a person who does not tip the waiter or doorman is perceived by others as ill-mannered, with bad manners, or as a greedy and miser. In short, if you decide to go to a restaurant, you will have to fork out some cash. In Europe, as always, all phenomena develop according to a strictly constructed logical chain. Tipping was never prohibited there. This is probably why catering establishments differ from Russian ones in their higher quality of service. In addition, in Europe, there are conditionally two categories of people working in the field of catering and public services: a) those who must tip (head waiters, hotel servants, taxi drivers, waiters, hairdressers: it is customary to give them 10-12% tips from the bill amount; bellhops, doormen, long-distance bus drivers, tour guides, cloakroom attendants: it is customary to tip them, guided by their own intuition, i.e. the size of the tip is determined by the client; b) those to whom it is not necessary to tip, but can be done with the help hard cash to express your gratitude for performing a special assignment or service for a client (maids, receptionists, elevator operators, cooks, servants of the house where you were invited to visit, program sellers in the theater, circus, etc., gas station attendants).

Below is a list of several general rules of behavior when visiting a restaurant or cafe.

A man who invites a woman to a restaurant or cafe must arrive before the appointed time. In case of delay. I need to apologize to the lady.

The most comfortable place in a restaurant is considered to be a place near the wall, and the most honorable for ladies is facing the entrance.

The cups should be held by the ear, without inserting the index finger into it and without putting the little finger aside.

After stirring the sugar in the cup, remove the spoon and place it on the saucer. If the saucer is deep, a teaspoon can be placed on its edge. Sipping hot tea or coffee from a spoon is considered a sign of bad taste.

There is no need to blow into a cup of hot tea or coffee. You should wait until the drinks cool down. You can only stir them lightly with a spoon so as not to knock it against the walls of the cup.

You can only take a cup of hot drinks in your hands. The saucer should be left on the table.

There is no need to drink the grounds left after drinking coffee.

If the tea is served with lemon, you need to lightly press the fruit slice with a spoon, squeezing out the juice, after which the spoon can be placed on the saucer. The tea is drunk and the remaining lemon slice is left in the cup.

The tea bag squeezed out with a spoon should be removed from the cup with the same spoon and placed on the saucer. There is no need to put the used tea bag in the ashtray.

If the drink is served in tall glasses and with a straw, then there is no need to drink it completely. The gurgling sound produced at the same time can only interfere with a pleasant conversation with a beautiful companion or friends

If cakes with butter cream are served with tea or coffee, they should be eaten so as not to stain the edges of the cup or glass. To do this, before washing down a piece of cake with tea or coffee, wipe your lips with a napkin.

According to the rules of restaurant etiquette, sponge cakes should be eaten with a teaspoon, and dry shortbread should be eaten in your hands.

After use, the napkin should be placed in a plate (but not in the ashtray).

A smoked cigarette should be extinguished in an ashtray, but not in a plate.

If there is a linen napkin on the table near the laid out cutlery, it should be unfolded and placed on your lap. If a woman carelessly drops such a napkin, the man should not pick it up and concentrate on the incident that happened, but, on the contrary, try not to notice his companion’s mistake. The lady will have to choose the time and quietly pick up the dropped napkin. After use, the linen napkin should be left on the table without folding it in half or in four.

A salad made from cucumbers and tomatoes should be eaten along with meat served on the same dish.

Food served in pots is not placed on plates.

CONCLUSION

Intelligence is not only in knowledge, but also in the ability to understand another. It manifests itself in a thousand and a thousand little things: the ability to argue respectfully, behave modestly at the table, the ability to quietly help another, take care of nature, not litter around you - do not litter with cigarette butts or swearing, bad ideas.

At the heart of all good manners is the concern that one does not interfere with another, so that everyone feels good together. We must be able to not interfere with each other. You need to cultivate in yourself not so much manners as what is expressed in manners, a caring attitude towards the world, towards society, towards nature, towards one’s past.

There is no need to memorize hundreds of rules, but remember one thing - the need to respect others.

Posted on Allbest.ru

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Etiquette in public places

Cinema, vernissage

In the cinema hall, in addition to such “troubles” as a lady in a hat, lovers with their heads bowed to each other, harsh perfume, a loud critic, there is a typical cinema scourge: the viewer who loudly tells his companion (companion) “what will happen now” . Such an uninvited commentator should be corrected by his companion. An outsider also has the right to reprimand him. In the cinema, unlike the theater, it is customary to eat candy, but, of course, you should not chew loudly, rustle papers or throw them under chairs.

At the stadium, neither the rustle of papers nor the crunch of caramels disturbs anyone. However, you should not litter either.

At a concert, any coughing, out loud remarks, in a word, anything that could interfere with listening to the music is especially undesirable. Under no circumstances should you hum the melody that sounds from the stage or beat out the beat with your hand.

After a concert, performance or film show, a man escorts the woman he invited home. Having taken her by taxi or his own car, the man waits for her to enter the entrance; It is even more polite to get out of the car and escort your companion to the door of her apartment. A woman whom a man invited to a performance, saying goodbye, should thank him for a pleasant evening.

Vernissage

Vernissage, that is, the opening of an exhibition of paintings or sculptures, is also a kind of performance. Loud remarks are only permissible if they express approval. If you know the artist personally, it is customary to approach him and congratulate him. In such cases, special delicacy is required to avoid awkward comparisons with his contemporaries-artists. It may happen that the author of the exhibition does not consider the work of this particular artist to be a model for himself.

If you don’t know the artist personally, you can also approach him, introduce yourself and express your approval - he will be pleased.

Many women find it inconvenient to attend concerts and cinema alone. Of course, it’s more pleasant to go together. But the principle of “no one to go with” should not deprive a woman of aesthetic pleasure. The rules of good manners do not prohibit this at all; on the contrary, they encourage it.

Theater

It is better to come to the theater in advance, 15–20 minutes before the start of the performance, so that you have time to calmly undress, clean up, buy a program, and go to your seat. By arriving at a performance at the last minute, a latecomer disturbs those who have already taken their seats. Of course, someone has to be the last, but you need to try not to be them.

Upon entering the foyer, the man takes off his headdress, and when leaving, he puts it on at the door. In the wardrobe, he helps his companion take off her coat or raincoat, and only then undresses himself.

It is more natural, from an anatomical point of view, to walk to your seat with your back to the people sitting, because it is easier to get around their knees, but it is more polite to walk facing the people sitting. Politeness does not always completely coincide with convenience. It would be nice to apologize for the trouble.

The woman passes first, but if in this way she ends up to the left of the man, then, having reached her place, she does not sit on it, but takes the one that will be to the right of her partner. It is highly advisable for the man to hold the folding chair on which his companion should sit.

A woman, if her dress is complemented by a hat, should ask those sitting behind her whether her headdress is disturbing them. If the answer is: “Yes, a little,” the headdress should be removed. If she forgot to ask about this, it is quite acceptable for the spectator sitting behind her to politely ask to remove his hat. Such a request must be fulfilled unconditionally. When the woman takes off her headdress, the person sitting behind thanks her. Sometimes women's hairstyles cause even more inconvenience, especially since this structure cannot be removed. Therefore, when going to the theater, a woman needs to take this moment into account.

If two couples are seated in the auditorium, the women sit in the center, the men on both sides. Women sit in the box in front, men behind them. But since the view from the box is generally not very good, especially in the back rows, women should sit in such a way as to allow the men to see the stage.

If you meet a friend or acquaintance at the theater and want to sit together, you can invite your closest neighbor to change seats, but only to a seat of equal or better value.

Lovers should not sit in the theater with their heads bowed to each other - this causes inconvenience to those sitting behind. You should not abuse tenderness: do not force those around you to become scattered and witness two actions taking place on stage and in the auditorium at once.

The responsibility of a man who comes to the theater with a woman is to buy the program and give it to his companion. If you did not have time to do this before the performance, you can briefly ask the neighbor sitting next to you for the program (it is advisable to do this after you clarify that the owner of the program has already viewed it).

Previously, there was a custom to buy sweets for a lady, now, as a rule, this is done only if the seats are located separately, in a box. In general, it is better not to bring bags or boxes of candy into the auditorium at all: there is always the opportunity to treat your companion at the buffet during intermission. A woman, going to the theater, should not overuse perfume. There may be people nearby who are sensitive to odors.

If a person with a cold is going to the theater, he should take a cough tablet at home and take an extra one with him to take during the performance. Loud coughing disturbs not only the audience, but also the actors.

No loud comments or remarks in a low voice should be made during the performance. You can talk during intermission, but even then not too loudly.

Do not shout “encore” after the end of the action - “encore” is shouted at a concert, where an aria or dance can be repeated. An "encore" is a request for the artists to repeat what they have shown.

Those who use binoculars should remember that their purpose is to help the viewer see the stage better, and not to look at their neighbors in the hall.

You should never rush from the auditorium to the wardrobe until the action has ended and the actors have come out to bow. It is not necessary to applaud enthusiastically after an unimportant performance; but every time we visit, we say goodbye to the hostess?

In a restaurant, cafe

A man enters the restaurant lobby first. Upon entering the lobby, he must remove his headdress.

A man lets his lady go first into the restaurant hall. When choosing a place, he must consult with his companion.

You should not sit at a table in close proximity to the orchestra. If the evening program includes a performance by a singer, musician, or variety show artists, it is better to take seats from which the stage is clearly visible.

Occupying a table a man should not forget to move a lady's chair.

What should you do if all the tables are occupied?

If there are empty seats at the table, you can ask those sitting at the table for permission to take them. You should sit down only if consent has been obtained.

It is better to entrust the search for free seats to the head waiter than to do it yourself. If those sitting at the table refuse, you will feel some embarrassment in front of the lady. And it’s already very bad if you are refused at the next table. Having received consent, you should greet those sitting and thank them for their courtesy.

Who gets to know the menu first? First the lady, then the man. In a male company, this is done by the eldest in age or position.

Who chooses the wine varieties? The man chooses, but he certainly coordinates his choice with the lady.

Who gives the order to the waiter? The man, having previously consulted with the lady.

If the name of a particular dish is unfamiliar to you, You should definitely consult with the waiter about what it is. Without doing this, you should not order an unfamiliar dish.

Is it convenient to re-order something when the order has already been accepted? To do this, you just need to call the waiter with a slight gesture or tilt of your head. Calling the waiter loudly or talking to him familiarly is simply indecent. If the waiter does not have a name badge on his chest, you need to ask him and address the waiter only by his name.

Do you need to thank the waiter if you like a dish?

No. In this case, you should thank the cook who prepared the dish. You can convey your words of gratitude through the waiter or head waiter.

You can thank the waiter at the end of the evening for excellent service. Although during lunch itself you can express your gratitude to him with a nod of your head, a smile for the dish brought on time.

Who signals the end of lunch or dinner and how?

There may be several options here. If a gentleman and a lady are sitting at a table, then she signals the end of dinner by placing a fork and knife on her plate.

A man can invite her to stay longer, but should not be persistent.

If your neighbors are still staying at the time of leaving, you should say goodbye to them with a slight nod of your head.

Can a woman ask permission to sit down with a man who is alone at the table?

The rules of good manners do not even suggest this. It is believed that a woman understands well who she will be mistaken for if she offers herself as a neighbor to a man sitting alone at the table.

Is it permissible for a man to make such a request? No. This is not appropriate.

How do a man and a woman sit at the table? After the man has helped the woman sit down, he sits to her left.

When inviting a woman to take a seat at the table, a man should remember that it is more convenient to sit facing the audience.

How should you greet your acquaintances in the hall? A slight bow of the head.

If a woman passing by greets a man sitting at the table, he nods in response to her without getting up from the table.

If someone sitting at the table needs to say something to an acquaintance, he must get up from the table and come up for a conversation, having first asked forgiveness from his lady.

If you need to leave the table for other reasons, the man (woman) apologizes to the lady (man) and leaves the table. It is not necessary to explain the reason. It is enough to apologize and say a phrase like: “Sorry, I need to go out for a few minutes.”

How should you pay at a restaurant if you come there with a group? Everyone contributes their share, including women. If two men come to a restaurant, the person who invited pays the bill.

If a man comes with a woman, he pays the bill, regardless of who initiated the visit. If the woman who invited the man wants to pay herself, she must agree on this in advance.

How much should you tip? Tips to the waiter are usually 10 percent of the bill. Tips are given only in paper bills. Tipping is not accepted in taxis - they do not take change from the taxi driver unless the bill is too large.

After finishing lunch or dinner the man helps the woman get up from the table and lets her go forward.

In the wardrobe, he puts on his coat first, then helps the woman do it. A man puts on his headdress only when leaving the premises.

If it is late, the man accompanies the lady to the door of the apartment.

In the museum

How should you dress when visiting a museum?

The main requirement is neatness. Your suit should not be wrinkled, your shoes should not be uncleaned. If possible, try to show the originality of the event with your appearance. Still, you must admit, we don’t go to museums very often. And the exhibitions there don’t change very often.

How to behave in a museum? You should maintain silence and not disturb others from viewing certain exhibits.

Is it better to walk through the halls of the museum alone or with a group?

Naturally, the second option is preferable. You can see an exhibit ten times, but never learn anything about it. The guide will tell you so many interesting things that there will be enough memories and impressions for more than one day.

Can I ask the tour guide questions? Of course you can. He will tell you about it himself. Another thing is how to ask. When asking, try not to disturb the silence in the museum hall. Questions should not go beyond the scope of the excursion. You should not give categorical assessments of the presented exposition. It is unlikely that your opinion will be so objective as to be correct. Even experts express their opinions with many reservations. Peremptory statements are a sign of bad upbringing.

If you are nevertheless asked to express your assessment, you can only express it using words like: “It seems to me that ...” or “I think that ...”, etc.

Should I thank the guide for an interesting story? The rules of good manners require you to express your gratitude. Besides, shouldn't you say a few words of gratitude for a job well done?

In a sanatorium, rest home

What is considered the most important during a stay in a sanatorium or holiday home?

There is a routine with clear regulation of breakfasts, lunches, dinners and entertainment and other events.

You may not go to breakfast or lunch at all, but if you decide to go, then you should not be late for the table. Thus, you will distract your neighbors from eating, which will not promote appetite.

There is one more important point that must be taken into account. Well-mannered people get up from the table at the same time after dinner. Being late will make them wait for you to eat. You will involuntarily begin to rush and from the outside you will not look your best.

Communication on vacation is freer, but this does not mean that you can take liberties. However, your ease should not go beyond the bounds of decency.

Do not overdo it with telling jokes and funny stories, do not start all kinds of discussions. Not everyone is interested in this.

You should not discuss the behavior and manner of dressing of other vacationers.

Don't criticize the service and staff.

Remember: etiquette is fully observed here too.

The first acquaintance in a holiday home usually occurs at the dinner table. What's the best way to introduce yourself?

When you arrive at the table for the first time, greet those sitting and identify yourself.

It might look something like this: “Hello. I'm your new neighbor. Let me introduce myself. My name is…".

Options are possible, but the tone should be the most polite; You should introduce yourself to your tablemates with a slight, friendly smile.

What can you talk about at dinner with your neighbors?

The topics of conversation can be very different. But they should not touch on sensitive issues; try not to touch on the painful moments of our lives. Don't forget that you are on vacation. At the table you cannot criticize the quality of the dishes offered. This, on the one hand, is tactless, on the other hand, it spoils the appetite of the neighbors.

What kind of clothing is preferable at the resort?

Anything except the overly luxurious and pretentious one. In this outfit you can remain the “black sheep”. During the day, business casual clothing is appropriate. In the evening, during entertainment events, you can dress more elegantly. It is preferable to take clothes on vacation made from low-wrinkle and easily washable fabrics.

It is completely unacceptable to wear swimming trunks or a swimsuit outside the beach. There will always be people who come out in swimming trunks and a swimsuit straight from the room. This only indicates that not everything is in order with their upbringing.

What clothes are appropriate in the dining room?

You should come to the table neatly dressed, combed and carefully shaved. These are the basic requirements. It is not advisable to wear tights with your knees stretched out. An overly revealing outfit is also inappropriate. It's good to walk around the city in the summer, go to shops and museums. For dinner you have to go out modestly dressed.

If you are on vacation with a child.

You need to watch him carefully. Make sure that the child does not interfere with the rest of those around him, does not scream too loudly, does not run around throwing sand around, does not stay in the water for too long, and does not get sunburned.

In the church

What clothes is considered decent to wear to church?

Even if you are a non-believer and decided to come here out of simple curiosity, remember that it is inappropriate to attend church in a brightly colored toilet. Believers came here to pray, and nothing should distract them from this action. Women wear dark-colored dresses and only wear white ones for Holy Communion.

You are not allowed to enter the church in shorts; women are not allowed to wear trousers. This may end with the minion taking you outside.

How to behave in church and, in particular, during services?

They enter the church at a slow pace, making the sign of the cross. They stand modestly and silently. If there is a need to say something, do it quietly and briefly.

It is advisable to arrive at the beginning of the service. Latecomers enter unnoticed. It is not advisable to enter the church during the main prayers: reading the Gospel, singing “Our Father,” etc.

Is it possible to leave during the service?

Just very quiet. It is not advisable to leave during the main moments of the liturgy. It is considered the height of indecency to leave the church during a sermon.

When do they kiss the cross?

Accepting the blessing. First they kiss the cross, then the clergyman’s hand.

Is a hat necessary in church?

It is considered decent when a woman enters church with her head covered, and a man without a headdress.

How to behave in a church of another faith?

Before going there to watch a service or explore the temple, it would be nice to find out about the main features of the confession in order to avoid tactlessness and not break certain rules.

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Each of us has become an accidental witness of how parents feel embarrassed for their children on the street, in the subway, supermarket or even at the stadium. To avoid getting into such an unpleasant situation yourself You should learn the rules of behavior for children in public places. This may seem like a simple task only at first glance, since the line between a well-mannered child and a child intimidated by his parents is quite blurred. At the same time, etiquette requirements for children of different ages also vary.

If we see a four-year-old child screaming at the top of his lungs in the park, in principle, there is nothing wrong with this and, with the right approach, he can be weaned from it. If a boy is bawling, this is, at a minimum, alarming. What can we say about foul language, smoking and fighting. As a result, such behavior can lead to loneliness and problems with the law, because hooliganism is just a stone's throw away from crime.

Education should begin from the first years of a child’s life, since this aspect of education is no less important than physical and intellectual development. The baby absorbs everything unusually quickly, so let it be good manners rather than bad habits.

As it was said, preschoolers can be given certain concessions. The main thing is to teach them the following basics:

  • Do not play at the table during lunch;
  • Do not offend children, girls and do not bully friends (it is important not to overdo it here, after all, the child must be able to stand up for himself);
  • Do not beg strangers for sweets or toys;
  • Do not go far from your parents;
  • Listen to elders;
  • Don't torture animals.

All these norms must be absorbed, as well as the duty of washing hands before eating and brushing teeth. Remember, it is easier to teach than to re-teach.

Rules of behavior in public places for schoolchildren

There are generally accepted rules of behavior in public places that are simply obligatory. Their list can be found in any educational institutions, as well as places of recreation and leisure:

  • In public places and on the streets you should speak without raising your voice, try not to make noise or disturb strangers.
  • Maintain cleanliness - do not harm plants, do not spit or litter;
  • Don't be rude to older people and patronize younger ones. Try to help people with disabilities.
  • Do not damage private or public property.
  • Avoid unworthy actions, including insulting passers-by, cruelty to animals, petty hooliganism, theft, etc.
  • During the school year, schoolchildren cannot be outside after nine o'clock in the evening without being accompanied by their parents. During the holidays, the time spent outside is extended until 22:00 (not younger than 12 years of age).
  • It is allowed to attend public events (concerts, sports games, festivals) no later than 21:30.
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