Sexual intercourse after artificial birth. How long should you abstain? Contraception after childbirth

Intimate life is intimate so as not to let curious strangers into it and not to discuss it at every step, even if only with friends. But there are still situations when you can and even need to talk about sex life, for example, with a gynecologist after a successful birth. It is known that pregnancy and the birth of a new small family member leaves its mark on the relationship between spouses. Including sexual life, which also undergoes changes and requires a careful approach to resumption after childbirth.

Sexual life after childbirth - abstinence for at least 4 weeks

Sexual life after childbirth is definitely necessary, but the question of when and how to have the first sexual contact after the birth process must be approached responsibly. It is no secret that childbirth is a certain stress for the mother’s body, requires significant energy expenditure from her and leads to certain physiological changes. And after childbirth, a woman definitely needs time to recover: sexual activity in this case is usually indicated no earlier than after 4-8 weeks. Of course, everything here depends on the individual anatomical and physiological characteristics of the “newly made” mother, as well as on how the birth took place, how difficult or easy it was.

In any case, doctors do not recommend allowing sexual intercourse earlier than 4 weeks. This is the minimum time required for the restoration of the uterus after childbirth, as well as for its cleansing of blood residues. Returning to intimate life immediately shortly after the birth of a baby is also contraindicated because during this period the uterus is most susceptible to infection. And the risk of infection will not disappear until it returns to its original state and recovers.

If the birth was difficult, with incisions, the time before the start of sexual activity after childbirth should pass even more. Many people mistakenly believe that if the birth took place via cesarean section, then such problems regarding sexual life should not arise with the birth of the baby. And this is a completely false statement: afterward, a woman needs even more time to recover until the stitches from the operation completely heal.

Ideally, it is better for a couple to discuss the “permitted” moment for the first sexual contact after childbirth with a gynecologist. The specialist will examine the woman’s genitals and assess the speed and degree of their recovery, and therefore will be able to determine when to begin resuming sexual activity. In addition, the doctor will be able to advise the most suitable method of contraception to prevent another pregnancy almost immediately after the birth of the baby.

Possible problems

But, even if the first sexual intercourse is carried out according to the recommendations of doctors, it may still not at all live up to the “hopes” placed on it, both by the mother and the father. The most common problems that young parents encounter in the early stages after the birth of a baby are anatomical changes in the vagina and its dryness. The first is explained by the stretching of the vagina as the baby passes through the birth canal. Over time, doctors reassure, the vagina will return to its original shape, and this process can be accelerated by performing special exercises (so-called). A woman can perform them even during pregnancy, which allows her to avoid excessive stretching of the vagina and quickly return it “to tone” almost immediately after childbirth.

Vaginal dryness is also a temporary phenomenon, which is provoked by estrogen deficiency in the period after the birth of a child. The same factor becomes decisive in the occurrence of postpartum depression and depression in the mother, which is aggravated by fatigue. In this case, men are advised to treat the woman they love with understanding, not only helping her physically, but also supporting her morally. Special lubricants and creams will help cope with vaginal dryness.

Often women also complain about the discomfort they feel during sexual intercourse after childbirth, and the pain they experience. This situation may arise if the birth occurred with ruptures requiring suturing. Painful sensations occur if the sutures “catch” the nerve endings, and in this case it is recommended to jointly search for the most optimal position for sex, the maximum attention of the man to the woman’s sensations. Over time, the nerve endings adapt to new configurations, but for now you just have to take care and listen to each other during intimacy.

Maximum attention and tenderness

After the birth of a baby, a woman requires increased attention and tenderness from a man. Now more than ever (about the same as during pregnancy) she needs the psychological support of her beloved man. Regarding sex life: even if sexual contact is undesirable at first, no one forbids tactile caresses. Now is the time to get to know each other’s body again, find new sensitive areas and zones on it, treat each other with maximum affection and tenderness. But you need to be careful with women’s breasts if the new little family member is breastfed. In general, the postpartum period is not only difficult, but also filled with new pleasant worries, joy and trepidation. This is a new opportunity to re-evaluate the relationship between spouses, an opportunity to relive the first minutes of acquaintance on a physical level. The main thing here is love, mutual understanding, patience and the ability to listen to each other.

Especially for- Tatyana Argamakova

Most women are interested in the question of how long after childbirth they can have sex. The resumption of sexual activity is influenced by physical and psychological state.

The determining factor is the physical condition and the more successful the process of childbirth was, without complications, the sooner a full sexual life begins. Let's consider the types of physical condition and how to have sex in each individual case.

Sex after childbirth with a successful delivery

A safe birth – without tears, cracks and hemorrhoids, this is a woman’s dream. According to doctors’ recommendations, you can begin sexual activity within a month. Why is that?

• Over the course of a month, the uterine mucosa contracts and cleanses, as well as the healing of the “baby place”, the wound at the site of the placenta.
• Increased risk of additional infection.
• Two weeks after childbirth, the sensitivity of the muscles of the vagina and cervix returns, which is accompanied by aching pain for up to 2 months.
• The internal mucous membrane has not fully formed. Having sex injures fragile tissues.
• After six weeks, the woman comes to the gynecologist for an examination. Based on the results of the conclusion, the doctor will tell you how long it will take to return to sexual activity.

During sex, unpleasant sensations and discomfort may occur due to the physiological aspect - vaginal dryness. Appears due to hormonal changes, low levels of vitamin A and low libido. There is a decrease in sensitivity during sex due to slightly stretched vaginal muscles - Kegel exercises will help, strengthen the muscles of the perineum.

As soon as the muscles return to normal, increased sensitivity will arise, and many women will feel a full range of first sexual pleasures. As a result of pregnancy and childbirth, the number of receptors - sensitive nerve endings - increases tenfold, and new erogenous zones appear.

Doctors’ opinion on the question of whether it is possible to have sex after childbirth: “You need to start sexual activity after childbirth. By day 40, a woman is completely ready for sexual relations. She is completing the process of healing and tissue restoration. After this period, you can enter a new stage of your sexual life,” says obstetrician-gynecologist Natalya Volkova.

Sex after childbirth with perineal tears

Perineal rupture is a common occurrence. Statistics show that every 10 woman faces an unpleasant problem. The main discomfort comes from the ban on leading a sedentary lifestyle; you can only stand or lie down. The rupture is sutured with absorbable sutures and therefore precautions are observed for at least one month.

During this period, you cannot have sex. When the seam on the perineum begins to heal, pulling, cutting pain and constant itching occur. Unpleasant aspects include the growth of tissue in the form of nodules, which can be damaged; during intimacy, this causes pain.

For quick healing it is necessary to use special ointments and suppositories. The sutures dissolve on average within 10 months. The speed of healing is influenced by the depth of the rupture and the characteristics of the body: for some, the recovery period is faster, for others, it is slower, which is used to judge when you can make love after childbirth with ruptures.

You should follow the rules of personal hygiene to avoid infection - this is the main danger.

Therefore, sex after childbirth with perineal ruptures, if there are stitches, begins under the following factors:

• healing of the gap by 60%. The area of ​​thread resorption and the degree of tissue restoration are visually assessed;
• absence of aching pain and unpleasant odors.

Intimacy begins no earlier than 3 months later, but the following activities should be performed before sexual intercourse to avoid unpleasant sensations:

1. Apply emollient ointments to the perineal seam; baby cream with D-panten, Vasiline, dexpanthen, etc. are suitable. They can improve the elasticity of tissues, especially with impaired internal secretion, and also promote rapid healing.
2. They practice sex positions, especially for the first time, as gentle as possible - missionary or cowgirl position, in order to feel and control the whole process. This will reduce pain.
3. Avoid sudden movements, as this can injure a scar that is not yet fully formed.

Sometimes a situation arises when a woman is physiologically ready, but psychologically not.

Main reasons:

1. Fear. Fear that it will hurt and everything inside has changed. But you shouldn’t be afraid, the main thing is a positive attitude and relaxation.
2. Decreased sex drive. It is observed only in the first month after birth. After all, the body has experienced enormous stress and needs to recover, so a defense mechanism is triggered. From the second month there is an increase in sexual desire.
3. Lack of confidence in yourself and your own body, due to lost elasticity and extra pounds. Only a sexual partner can help increase self-esteem by showing care and patience.

Sex after childbirth with cervical ruptures

Cervical rupture during childbirth is an unpleasant and dangerous injury. It occurs as a result of a violation of the period of opening, with a large fetus or its breech presentation, or insufficient tissue elasticity.

The healing time is 3 - 4 months, that’s how long after giving birth you can have sex. According to research, 80% of couples return to intimate life using contraception.

Care is taken to ensure that the tissue is not re-injured and that the seam does not unravel. Sexual intercourse takes place without sudden movements, preferably in one position. After all, complete healing occurs within a year.

Sex after childbirth with caesarean section

A caesarean section is an abdominal surgery in which a 10 cm incision is made in the uterus and external tissues, and the baby is removed. The incision consists of two types: horizontal, located above the pubis, or vertical, passing from the navel to the pubis.

A caesarean section is performed only for medical reasons: contraindications due to the health of the mother in labor, a large fetus and its abnormal location, placenta previa. Despite the fact that the external genitalia are not deformed, this does not mean that you can immediately begin a sexual life.

When to start sexual activity after a caesarean section affects the success of the body’s recovery:

• Complete cleansing of the uterine mucosa from lochia. It contracts, accompanied by bloody bleeding. They gradually lighten and disappear, indicating that the uterus has returned to its original size.
• Healing of sutures. Removal occurs on day 7, and after a month thin scar tissue will form. During the recovery period, you need to carefully watch how the stitches heal.
• No bleeding, clots or pain in the lower abdomen.
• Not feeling sick. No dizziness, weakness or lethargy. Good psycho-emotional mood.

When can you start sexual activity individually for each woman? The average period is 2 – 3 months. The doctor will tell you the exact time based on test results, preliminary examination and pelvic ultrasound results.

Sex after cesarean section consists of a number of features:

• Refusal of difficult poses, you need to reduce the load on the abs. Using an appropriate and safe position is the classic missionary position.
• During sex, do not show sudden movements and muscle tension, so as not to provoke a rupture of the uterine cavity. The muscles do not have the required tone, due to the still retaining effect of the hormone relaxin.
• Only one position is allowed, without deep penetration and maintain maximum caution.
• Using contraception - condoms, at least for the first six months, this will protect not only from a dangerous infection that can cause an inflammatory disease, but also from an unplanned pregnancy. If a woman is breastfeeding, then the use of oral contraception is undesirable, since hormones pass into breast milk.

And most importantly, if during or after intimacy you feel discomfort, pain in the lower abdomen, or discharge, then you should stop and consult a doctor. Taking the necessary tests and additional examination will allow you to identify and eliminate the cause of the discomfort.

Anal sex after childbirth

Due to unwanted contraindications to the beginning of classical intimacy, many couples consider anal sex after childbirth to be a safe option.

This option is highly undesirable for the following reasons:

1. As a result of pushing, hemorrhoids and swelling appear - this causes pain and discomfort, accompanied by minor bleeding.
2. Constant constipation and the appearance of anal fissures. Open wounds appear that become infected.
3. Muscle function is impaired.
4. With sutures on the perineum, due to ruptures during childbirth, repeated divergence or rupture is possible.

The question arises: is it possible to have anal sex? Due to painful sensations, start 5 months after birth. All this time is spent on the recovery period and treatment.

Conclusion

Let's summarize the article with the opinion of obstetrician-gynecologist Natalya Moroz about how long after childbirth they have sex : « You can begin sexual activity no earlier than two months later. During this period, the recovery process takes place.

After examination by a gynecologist, who ascertains the facts about the normal vaginal mucosa. No damage, no granulation after sutures, no deformation. The mucous membrane is thinned after childbirth and during feeding, there is no hydration, and this disrupts normal sex life.

Therefore, you need to come to the gynecologist and talk about your future intimate life,” she says. There is no need to rush, the body must recover properly. The postpartum period, which passes without complications, will allow you to quickly return to sexual activity.

This is probably one of the most vile misconceptions. When they remember him, they talk about the “bucket” in which the penis should dangle.

Indeed, the birth canal is stretched to allow the baby to pass through, and hormones are actively helping them. After childbirth, the process goes in the opposite direction, the muscles are restored.

You can’t have sex right after giving birth, but by the time you can, everything returns to normal.

And in general, if the myth about the bucket were true, women after the first birth would not be able to use tampons and bear children: everything would fly out, wouldn’t it?

Sometimes muscles do not tone up for a long time after childbirth. But the problem in this case is not sex at all, but other symptoms: incontinence Vagina changes after childbirth, For example. Exercises for the pelvic floor muscles, or, in severe cases, surgical interventions help to cope with this. But this is a complication, not a common case.

Myth 2. There won't be sex for a very long time.

Everyone has their own idea of ​​what is long, but the standard recovery period is from four to six weeks. Usually, at this time, doctors advise taking a time out so that the body comes to its senses, the bleeding stops and all the muscles and organs fall into place.

For some people this process goes faster. But in general, a month or a month and a half after giving birth, a woman needs to visit a gynecologist, who will tell whether everything is in order and whether it is possible to return to sexual life.

And don’t forget that not all sex is taboo.

Myth 3. Your partner will become unattractive

It's not just about the female form. Beliefs say that a man will stop wanting sex because:

1. A woman will not get back into shape after giving birth.
2. The woman will become the mother of his children, not his mistress.
3. A man will see a woman in labor and will forever lose sexual interest in her.

A woman stops wanting sex because she completely switches to caring for the child.

In principle, everything described above happens, but the loss of desire in the end is only a consequence of completely different problems in the relationship. When you solve them, sex will return.

Myth 4. It will hurt

Unfortunately, this is not entirely a myth. Many women are afraid of pain, especially if the birth was difficult and there are stitches in the birth canal and perineum.

In most cases, the sutures heal well within the same 4-6 weeks, but discomfort may appear during sex. From fear, insufficient arousal, lack of lubrication and everything that appears from fatigue and decreased libido because of it.

If the recovery period has passed without complications, then all problems can be solved with good foreplay, absence and lubricants.

Myth 5. Sex will become rare

Another not-quite-myth. Sex may actually become less frequent, because a small child and lack of sleep do not increase sexuality. The point, in general, is not about sex, but about fatigue or postpartum depression, due to which libido drops to unknown depths.

A banal truth: parents should not forget about themselves and each other when a child is born.

Buy what will help you care for your child and what gets in the way, distribute responsibilities and don’t try to do everything in the world.

Nobody said it would be easy, but it won't always be difficult. You will learn to manage time wisely and find the strength to have sex if you want.

Myth 6. You can’t use protection

In some cases, while a woman is breastfeeding, she does not ovulate (and at the same time menstruation), which means she cannot become pregnant: there are no eggs ready for fertilization. But this does not mean that you can not protect yourself.

Firstly, feeding does not always equal the absence of ovulation. Secondly, no one knows when the body decides it’s time to start and starts the cycle. You can easily get to that very first ovulation after childbirth, and the woman will become pregnant. Once the baby is six months old, the risks increase Sex and contraception after birth.

So you need to protect yourself, unless you are urgently trying to have another child. Well, with a new partner, by default you need to use a condom.

Naturally, after childbirth, physiological changes occur in a woman’s body, which leave an imprint on the sexual side of the relationship between spouses. In the first 6–8 weeks after the baby is born, gynecologists do not recommend having sex after childbirth. This is due to the fact that during this time there is a reverse development (involution) of all organs and systems that have undergone changes in connection with pregnancy and childbirth. The exception is the mammary glands, the function of which reaches its peak in the postpartum period.

The most pronounced involutional changes occur in the genital organs, especially in the uterus. After the birth of the placenta, a large wound surface remains, which takes approximately 4–6 weeks to heal. During this period, lochia is secreted - in the first days they are bloody, gradually their color changes from red to brownish, by the 4th week the discharge almost stops and soon disappears completely. Sexual activity after childbirth can facilitate the penetration of infection through the slightly open cervix into the uterus, and the released blood and open wound surface will only contribute to the rapid development of inflammation.

After vaginal birth, complications often occur in the form of incisions or ruptures of the perineum, vaginal walls or cervix. It also takes time for stitches to heal after childbirth. Even if there were no ruptures during childbirth, the tone of the muscles of the vagina and perineum after natural childbirth is significantly reduced. The recovery process after childbirth depends on the condition of these muscles before pregnancy, on whether the woman trained them while expecting a baby, on age and genetic characteristics.

In women after a cesarean section, the vaginal walls do not change, but the recovery of the uterus after childbirth is slower. In addition, it takes time to heal and form a full-fledged scar on the abdomen.

So, 6-8 weeks after giving birth, it is advisable to visit a gynecologist who will determine the condition of the uterus, cervix, sutures on the perineum or vaginal walls, scar after cesarean section, and take a smear on the flora to identify signs of inflammation. After this, the doctor will give recommendations on when you can resume intimate relationships.

Sex after childbirth. Possible problems

When resuming sexual activity after childbirth, a couple may encounter the following problems:

Vaginal dryness. After childbirth, most women experience a sharp decrease in the level of female sex hormones - estrogens. As a result, the amount of natural vaginal lubrication produced decreases. For this reason, sexual intercourse can be uncomfortable and even painful for a woman. In this case, it is worth stocking up on a special lubricant (lubricant), which can be bought at the pharmacy. You just need to carefully monitor the composition of these products and not use those that contain hormones if a woman is breastfeeding.

Painful sex after childbirth may also be associated with the presence of stitches and scars in the perineum and vagina. Sometimes the configuration of the vagina may change due to the sutures. Pain is also often observed in the area of ​​the abdominal scar after cesarean section. Of course, over time, as the tissue in the area of ​​the tears and incisions heals completely, these sensations will pass. But until this happens, in order to avoid discomfort or eliminate it, you need to choose a position during sexual intercourse in which minimal pressure is applied to the scar. You can consult with the gynecologist who is observing you, who will recommend local medications to speed up the recovery of tissue in the suture area after childbirth, approved for use by nursing mothers.

Weakening of the tone of the vaginal muscles and its expansion can leave their mark on the sensations during the first sexual intercourse. However, this phenomenon is temporary and the problem will go away within a few months, especially if the woman can find very little time to do Kegel exercises, which consist of contracting the pelvic muscles that support the vagina. These muscles can be felt when you voluntarily stop urinating or tense the vagina.

To quickly restore their tone after childbirth, it is advisable to perform exercises every hour for 3 weeks. The technique is very simple: for 5 seconds you need to tense the muscles of the perineum and anus (as if you really want to go to the toilet), then you should hold them in a state of maximum tension for 5 seconds, then gradually relax them over another 5 seconds. Then, after a 5-second rest, the exercise is repeated. At one time you need to do at least 30 contractions - it will only take a few minutes.

It must also be said that many women do not experience any problems with sex after childbirth - on the contrary, they say that the attraction to their husband has become stronger and the orgasm is brighter.

Let's do without surprises

A very important aspect of sexual relations after the birth of a baby is the issue of pregnancy protection. Doctors believe that the minimum interval between births should be at least 2 years. During this time, the woman’s body is completely restored.

The choice of contraceptive method depends on the regularity of sexual intercourse, breastfeeding and the preferences of the spouses. It is also necessary to take care of pregnancy protection in cases where the menstrual cycle has not yet resumed, since even in the absence of menstruation, ovulation, that is, the release of an egg from the ovary, can occur. Let's look at the main methods of contraception after childbirth.

Interrupted sexual intercourse. The use of interrupted coitus is a very ineffective method of contraception. Firstly, not every man is able to clearly feel the onset of ejaculation and control himself at this moment. Secondly, a certain amount of sperm is released during sexual intercourse. According to some data, they are the most mobile and viable, which, accordingly, makes the likelihood of conception very high. In addition, during repeated sexual intercourse, sperm that remains on the walls of the man’s urethra after the first ejaculation may enter the vagina. The effectiveness of this method of contraception is only 70–75%.

Lactational amenorrhea method. This method of contraception is based on the absence of ovulation during breastfeeding. While feeding the baby, the hormone prolactin is released, which increases milk production and has a contraceptive effect by suppressing the function of a woman's ovaries.

For the contraceptive method to work successfully, the following conditions must be met:

• the child is exclusively breastfed, without the use of supplementary feeding or additional water;
• the baby suckles at the breast at least every 3 hours during the day;
• the interval between night feedings should not exceed 6 hours (the more often the feedings occur, the more effective the contraceptive method);
• absence of menstruation;
• no more than 6 months have passed since birth.

However, with increasing intervals between feedings and the introduction of supplementary feeding, the method of contraception becomes ineffective. In addition, the more time has passed since childbirth, the higher the likelihood of an unplanned pregnancy. In some women, even despite breastfeeding, ovarian function may resume as early as 1.5–2 months after birth, resulting in ovulation and pregnancy. If a woman has returned to menstruation, even if less than 6 months have passed since giving birth, she must choose another method of contraception after childbirth. The effectiveness of the method depends on the interval after childbirth: in the first 6 months, if all conditions are met, pregnancy occurs in approximately 1–2% of cases, from 6 to 12 months – in 4.5–7%.

Barrier methods of contraception– condom, diaphragms, cervical caps. Barrier methods of contraception do not affect the process of breastfeeding and the condition of the child. Therefore, they can be used without restriction in any period after childbirth. Efficacy ranges from 90–98% with a condom, 70–80% with a cervical cap, and 77–98% with a diaphragm.

Spermicides exist in various forms - foam, sponges, gels, soluble films, tablets, ointments or suppositories. Spermicides contain a chemical that destroys sperm and a carrier that spreads the product into the vagina. They do not contain hormones and act only locally, so they can be used during breastfeeding. In addition, spermicides have a moisturizing effect, which is a positive thing for women who do not produce enough lubrication during the postpartum period.

Among the disadvantages of spermicides, the following can be noted: some forms of spermicide release require you to wait a certain time before sexual intercourse; Some women, especially in the postpartum period, may experience skin irritation and allergic reactions to spermicide. The effectiveness of spermicides is just over 60%.

Intrauterine device (IUD)- an intrauterine contraceptive device, which is a small device made of plastic with copper, silver or gold. The IUD is inserted into the uterus by a gynecologist. The mechanism of action of the intrauterine device is that it inhibits the movement of sperm into the uterine cavity, reduces the lifespan of the egg and prevents the attachment of the fertilized egg to the uterine wall. Insertion of an intrauterine device is possible 6 weeks after birth. Before this, you need to undergo examination by a gynecologist. The IUD does not affect milk production, so its use is safe during breastfeeding. In addition to conventional intrauterine devices, there is a hormonal intrauterine system. It secretes a small amount of a hormone, an analogue of progesterone, which further blocks the growth of the endometrium and prevents the attachment of the fertilized egg in the uterus. During lactation, a hormonal IUD can also be used 6 weeks after birth.

The negative aspects of this method of contraception after childbirth are: increased risk of developing an inflammatory process in the uterus; increased likelihood of developing an ectopic pregnancy (with the use of a hormonal IUD, this risk is extremely small); There are quite a large number of contraindications, the main of which are chronic inflammatory diseases of the pelvic organs.

For non-hormonal IUDs, the Pearl index1 is about 1–1.5, for hormonal IUDs it is about 0.5.

Hormonal contraceptives. During breastfeeding, a young mother can take not all hormonal contraceptives, but only those that do not contain estrogens - hormones that pass into breast milk and can pass on to the baby. Nursing mothers can use hormonal contraceptives containing only gestagens - analogues of the hormone progesterone. These substances enter the woman’s body in very small quantities, and even less of them penetrate into milk. These hormones are safe for the baby. Such contraceptives can be in the form of tablets (mini-pills), injections (shots, most often long-acting) or implants implanted under the skin for several months. These products can be used 6 weeks after birth.

The advantages of these funds include their high efficiency. The Pearl index for modern contraceptives is 0.1–0.5. The disadvantages are the need for daily intake at a precisely defined time and the presence of contraindications - therefore, before starting to take these drugs, be sure to consult with a gynecologist.

Surgical sterilization– tubal ligation. This is an irreversible method of contraception after childbirth. It is most often performed during a cesarean section or after childbirth at the request of the woman. May be recommended for women over 35 years of age and with two or more children.

In order for everything to return to normal when you resume intimate relationships after such an important stage of your life as pregnancy and the birth of a child, there is no universal recipe - everything is very individual. But by showing patience and mutual understanding, you can ensure that sex after childbirth brings even more pleasure than before.

The most difficult period is behind us - the birth of a child. Gradually, mom and dad get used to the new way of life, enjoying the baby “sniffling” in the crib. The woman regains her physical and psychological strength. Gradually the question of intimate relationships arises. After all, a man has been abstaining for quite some time and a woman has her own physiological needs. Sex after childbirth, when it is possible, how it will change, how partners will feel and many more questions that concern young parents will be discussed in this article.

Why can't you have sex for at least 40 days after giving birth?

Sexual intercourse is not only a means of obtaining pleasure, but also a physiological process during which, in 99.9% of cases, microflora from the outside is introduced into the genital tract. This is why experts oppose early resumption of intimate life. The fact is that the woman’s mucous membrane, which protects the pelvic organs, has not yet been restored, and the organs at the reconstruction stage look like an open wound. “Foreign” microflora introduced during sex can have a detrimental effect on a woman’s health and cause bleeding, inflammation of the uterus after childbirth, and endometritis.

The figure of 40 days appeared in ancient times, when midwives forbade men to touch their wives. It worked; psychologically, men perceived this figure as mystical (40 saints, on the 40th day the dead are remembered). Today it remains relevant from a medical point of view. Gynecologists strongly recommend maintaining a period of abstinence from sex after childbirth for at least 6 weeks, since after the normal passage of the birth process, which passed without complications, the uterus is restored and reaches its previous size by the end of 6 weeks, and they exactly coincide with the period of 40 days .

If, nevertheless, this happened and you could not stand this time (the husband could not restrain himself) and you began to experience the following symptoms, then immediately consult a gynecologist.

Symptoms:

• unusual discharge (not similar to suckers);
• unnatural smell;
• temperature increase;
• pain in the lower abdomen;
• the general condition will worsen.

By arriving at the hospital on time, you will avoid possible complications, since this condition in the past was called “childbirth fever” and often women died from it.

Sex after childbirth, when can you try?

When discharging from the maternity hospital after childbirth, the gynecologist, when giving advice, always focuses on the resumption of intimate life. If the birth process went well without complications, then a figure of 6–8 weeks will be given. But why should you give up sex after childbirth? There are quite objective reasons for this. Firstly, a woman needs time to fully recreate the uterus, heal the birth canal along which the child walked, and cleanse the uterus from the remnants of bloody discharge (suckers).

Secondly, during difficult labor with ruptures or a cesarean section, the recovery time increases and can be 8 weeks or more. And as has already been written before, sex after childbirth is undesirable because various infections can get into the woman’s genitourinary system.

Each organism is unique, it should be noted that many mothers stop having problems after a month. This is facilitated by the correct organization of breastfeeding, since with active sucking movements of the baby, the uterus contracts, pushing the suckers out. Recently, in medical practice, it is not uncommon for a woman to begin menstruation 6 weeks after childbirth (it is often confused with bleeding). This indicates that all organs involved in the birth process have been restored and sex can definitely be given the green light.

If you see suckers even after 8 weeks, then you urgently need to consult a gynecologist to exclude the possibility of inflammation of the uterus after childbirth. This delay in “cleansing” is often due to the fact that the woman does not breastfeed the baby, and the muscles of the uterus are so weakened that they cannot cope with pushing out the remains after childbirth. At your appointment you can find out whether you can start an intimate relationship.

Why do women try to postpone sexual intercourse?

In addition to the doctors’ ban, the woman herself comes up with ways and reasons to postpone sex until later. What pushes her to do this and how will she cope with the problem?

"It would hurt me"

Naturally, a woman feels aching pain in her genitals after childbirth for a long time. And she's scared of having sex because she thinks there's a big open wound inside her. The husband must help his wife. It is he who, with his caresses of her body, must bring her to a state where she herself wants intimacy. Of course, this may take more than one evening, but it's worth it.

"I am big"

A very common excuse. Yes, indeed, the vaginal muscles are still stretched and the penis may well “drown.” But if you choose a position so that the woman’s legs are brought together and not the entire penis enters the vagina, but only its edge, then the stretchiness will not even be felt. The only unpleasant moment may be the popping sounds due to the fact that the vaginal walls are not in good shape; the main thing is not to show surprise or any other reaction to them.

"I `m ugly"

A sagging belly that has not yet retracted, full breasts from which milk is dripping, red eyes from lack of sleep, at best a ponytail on the head (which I managed to do). Who would want one? This is exactly what many people think. But through the eyes of a man who hasn’t had sex for at least 2-3 months, you are the most beautiful and desirable. Yes, in the future you will have to resort to tricks and wear underwear to warm up your husband, but in the first weeks when you say it’s okay, the “hungry” man will not care about your belly and dripping milk.

"I'm tired and I don't have time for it"

Of course, with the birth of a child, life changed dramatically and many new worries fell on my mother’s shoulders. But this is not a reason to push your partner away. Just ask him to help you with the baby (change a diaper, put him to bed) or around the house (cook dinner, wash the floor). Such insignificant help will ease the mother’s lot, but the time saved can be spent together when the baby falls asleep.

Problems that arise during the first intimate relationship after childbirth

Of course, the first sex after childbirth cannot be called ideal, but you can try to make it that way. Let's talk about the most common problems that young parents may encounter during their first intimate relationship.

Pain during the process in a woman

In this case, it is better to postpone sex or consult a doctor to find out the cause. You can also choose a position in which there will be no pressure on the painful area.

Unnatural popping sounds

This happens because the walls of the vagina are stretched and folded. When the penis moves, the air in the folds comes out, making a sound. The main thing is not to attach any importance to it and try not to pay attention.

Dryness

Due to the lack of the hormone estrogen (its decrease is observed after the birth process), a young mother experiences vaginal dryness. This brings some inconvenience when having sex. This state of affairs can be corrected with the help of lubricants. You need to purchase them at a pharmacy and be sure to pay attention to their composition.

Infection

To prevent this from happening, ask your husband to wash the penis before intercourse (everywhere, pushing back the edges of the flesh). Also pay attention to hand and nail hygiene.

Lack of pleasure

This mainly happens because the vagina is stretched after childbirth. For this reason, a man needs to think about how he can please his partner. These may be activities that will lead to clitoral orgasm. Over time, the vaginal muscles will become toned and vaginal orgasm will return.

Postpartum depression

This is a common reason why a young mother avoids sex or takes the “log” position in bed. To eliminate depression, it is necessary to find out the cause of its occurrence and try to eliminate it. Resuming sexual relations after childbirth should begin very slowly. Initially, engage in intimate caresses, excluding intimacy with penetration. The partner needs to relax as much as possible and try to carefully penetrate inside using “gentle” poses that will be most comfortable for her. It is preferable to use the “woman on top” position or sex lying on your side.

Each young mother decides for herself when to have sex after childbirth. The body gives her signals that it is ready to restore sexual relations and she will definitely feel them. But do not forget that the first sexual intercourse requires increased attention of partners to each other (especially from the male side), in addition to intercourse itself, foreplay and intimate caresses are necessary, do not forget about kind words. Poses with shallow penetration and non-traumatic movements will help make the first sex after childbirth enjoyable for both partners. After it, the woman will be 100% sure that she is ready to return to normal sex life or should she wait a little longer. Many women, having given birth to a child, discover sex in a new way; it will acquire more colors and shades of sensations.

The most important thing is, no matter how difficult it may be at first to “fit into” a new life in which the main task is caring for the baby. Take time for yourself, your husband, and do not deprive yourself of such pleasant worldly pleasures as sex after childbirth. Only mutual understanding and the ability to make concessions can make your family stronger.

Author of the publication: Valeria Samoilova