To be a man or to appear macho. What do real macho guys get caught with?

There is no escape from machismo and testosterone. Guys copy the behavior of advertising characters and cliched movie characters. What is hidden under the guise of a “male for show”? And most importantly, can a macho man become a good husband?

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Where does the term macho come from?

Macho (the Spanish word macho - translated as “male”) is an aggressive, straightforward man.

The Latin American slang word "macho" has a Russian equivalent - a real man. Representatives of the stronger sex pronounce the word macho with respectful intonation, women - with aspiration and some trepidation.

Meanwhile, in literal translation, “macho” means nothing more than… “bull.” The cruel, wild, powerful animal became the personification of the masculine principle, its untamed natural essence. However, in addition to the unbridled temper and aggressiveness, the bull is also characterized by some primitiveness.

In defense of macho

What's wrong with a man wanting to conquer a woman and not hiding it?

He behaves offensively towards women, feminists will now say, and virgins will immediately blush. The first are out of conviction, the second are out of habit.

Many are inclined to explain machismo by the disappearance of sensuality and sincerity in a consumer society. They call it an intolerant value system. If we think like this, then lusting after women will soon become intolerant and illegal.

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Macho accusation

The famous psychologist Dmitry Olshansky characterizes the behavior of a macho as follows: “It is obvious that women are not the goal, they are only a means... Therefore, the macho constantly has to prove that he is a “real man”.”

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Based on the statement of the psychologist, the macho man just plays the role of a real man, deceiving himself and those around him.

How is this expressed?

The macho doesn’t know how to be a man; he wasn’t taught this since childhood. He copies the behavior of movie characters, fictional, not real. Thus, he pretends to be someone he really is not.

Why does a macho leave women after the first night?

That's why he quits, because he's not a real man. He doesn't know what to do with a woman when he has won her favor. The goal was achieved, but the movies didn’t show him what to do next.

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Who is a real man?

He could be a fireman, a school geography teacher, or an oligarch. There is no one true path to masculinity.

The main thing is to be, not to appear. Macho is a role mask. A man is a natural state.

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Code of rules by which you can distinguish a real man from a macho:

Admits his mistakes. A confident man knows when he was wrong and knows how to apologize in time. Sometimes even without words. He will buy the girl a bouquet of flowers, bring her breakfast in bed, take her to the Cote d'Azur, and make a child. The desired child.

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He's an expert in any field. For example, he is well versed in cars. What attracts him to cars is the same thing that attracts him to women - they are beautiful, interesting and complex. No wonder men talk about cars like they talk about women.

Not dating a friend's sister, unless he has intentions of marrying her.

Not dating a friend's ex-girlfriend without his direct consent.

Shares things. He borrows his wife's drill, axe, and saucepan. This, of course, does not apply to cars. A car is not a thing. This is “our swallow”.

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Doesn't use emoticons in correspondence. They can be used when communicating with women, but it is important not to overdo it.

Helps to those who need help.

Trusts to your friends, partner, family.

He keeps his promises and expects this from others.

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Not afraid of gays. Sharp manifestations of homophobia indicate insecurity in the sexual sphere, and not about its strength. Favorite music, clothes, expensive perfume and even the desire to cry while watching a movie, flowers for his wife, sensitivity and goodwill towards others do not make a man gay. What makes a person homosexual is the tendency to engage in romantic and sexual relationships with people of the same sex. That's all.

Psychoanalyst Dmitry Olshansky, known for his work on issues of male sexuality, told the magazine “Our Psychology” about who is hiding under the guise of “cool” macho men, why they abandon seduced girls after the first night of love, and what archetypes influence their consciousness.

OUR PSYCHOLOGY: What is machismo? Why do some men choose this type of behavior? What complexes does this speak of?

DMITRY OLSHANSKY: Such a question already presupposes a diagnosis. They say that machismo is a male disease in which a man does not know how to love women and, due to the number of sexual relationships, tries to compensate for the lack of quality of love relationships. All this has already become common place in psychological exercises. Many experts tend to explain machismo by the disappearance of sensuality and sincerity in the consumer society, by the pragmatism and alienation that govern modern man, and some of them, under the leadership of feminists, immediately rush to treat this “emotional poverty” and seek to add machismo to the list of psychiatric diseases. Indeed, from their point of view, machismo is a deeply intolerant value system, offensive and unacceptable for women. However, all these sermons about tolerance, the consumer attitude of people towards each other and the lack of warmth between them explain little. The psy-industry has not moved beyond condemnation and attempts to treat machismo. Clinical cases where psychologists try to cure a man of increased attraction to women are absolutely ridiculous. Indeed, living with such a huge, swollen problem is extremely difficult. And in general, wanting women is intolerant and chauvinistic; everyone needs to immediately fight such desires. With the help of pills and electric shock, of course...

But seriously, few people take upon themselves the responsibility to understand the causes of machismo, to hear what exactly the macho wants to tell us, what the goals of his defiant provocations are aimed at, which, admittedly, often hit the target and seriously anger toothy feminists.

NP: So this is a form of provocation and nothing more?

D.O.: I think not. A macho, like any neurotic, demands something. But he doesn’t demand women or sex at all: as we see, they just can’t satisfy him; he demands something else, which he doesn’t find in women. It is obvious that women are not his goal, they are only a means, the macho uses them to say something about his identity. About how unsure he is of her. Therefore, he constantly has to prove that he is a “real man,” as if he himself doubts it. Following the example of Hemingway, whose mother braided his hair with bows as a child, and therefore the famous writer spent his entire adult life squeezing out femininity and nurturing his masculinity. Indeed, by analyzing the life of a macho, you can discover a lot of interesting things: often their parents wanted a daughter, but a son appeared. Was there a boy? The macho man answers this question all his life and proves that there was a boy after all.

The second factor that many analysts talk about is homosexuality. The prerequisite for defiantly masculine behavior is repressed or latent homosexual thoughts, which the macho cannot accept, so he desperately tries to get rid of them and, with the help of countless women, prove to himself that he is, after all, a normal man. But what does it mean? Being a man does not mean possessing some attribute or exhibiting certain behavioral traits, especially since each social group has its own. For example, in gay culture there is a common image of a lout-stud who dresses in leather, swears and rides a motorcycle. Why not a “real man”? This question torments every real macho. What does it mean to be a man? This is exactly what he doesn’t know.

NP: It turns out that the macho man is internally unsure of his masculine strength?

D.O.: Any acting out always indicates a lack of symbolization: an insecure boss will put on the mask of a despot, a weak father will portray the world’s dad, a woman’s low self-esteem will force her to become a regular client of plastic surgeons. These almost rhetorical conclusions are well known to everyone. In the same way, the macho declares his masculine weakness: he does not know how to be a man, he was not taught, he was not shown an example, so he pretends to be a real man, while ordinary men who know the answer to the question do not pretend to be anything. no need to. In other words, in such an exaggerated form, the macho makes a claim to his father: “You didn’t teach me to be a man,” he seems to be saying, accusing his parent of powerlessness.

NP: Is everything really explained by psychological reasons, and the social factor does not play any role?

D.O.: Of course, we shouldn’t forget about the consumer society either. But who is the macho here? Not a consumer at all. It is a great illusion to think that he is a successful client of the entertainment industry, a greedy cynic with a consumerist attitude towards women. The macho is an object of use, a victim of consumption - this is precisely the thought from which he runs and which he is afraid to meet. When a man begins to implement the typical macho scenario, he very soon realizes that he is far from being the author of his life, but only one of many millions who are hooked on the consumer worldview, which prescribes all his desires. And as soon as he understands this, he becomes very anxious. Facing the fact that everything in your life has already been written down by someone else risks turning into a real disaster. In any case, the number of those who have lost the meaning of life is growing every day.

NP: Why is this image so attractive to both men and women?

D.O.: In the sexual fantasies of neurotics, there is always an image of an impersonal partner, reduced to the level of a thing, a woman-doll or a man-wallet, which you can use, buy, break, throw away, do whatever you want with him. To become such an object of use is both attractive and frightening at the same time, which is why neurotics often play at being cynical and corrupt. Some women take pleasure in portraying a whore who will be humiliated, betrayed and trampled, others diligently put on the “dumb blonde” mask over their two higher educations, believing that this is the requirement of modern culture. In addition, classic female masochism forces them to look for a master in a man and to be used by him, to become a “keeper of the hearth,” “an eternal muse,” or a “military field wife.” Another thing is that a woman, if she is a real hysteric, is not satisfied with the role of the victim, but only plays it for a man (and understands this very well), believing that he must give the woman what he himself does not have.

Therefore, a macho man always turns out to be a loser in the eyes of a woman: he has nothing to offer her except sex. He turns into a completely helpless creature, an unmasked character from an Italian comedy whose mask has been removed. It is this spiritual nakedness, defenselessness and, perhaps, sincerity that a woman seeks from a macho, and therefore she is ready to surrender to him, even if she perfectly understands his tactics. The saying “a man uses love to get sex, and a woman uses sex to get love” works quite well here. Many ladies, however, at this moment realize all their sadistic fantasies and shower yesterday’s gentleman with ridicule, who the next morning turns out to be an ordinary bald man.

NP: Why does a man play the role of a macho?

D.O.: Good question. The male party in this love game is completely different: the macho does not know that he is playing. This is the main difference between a macho man and a victim woman: he does not even know what stage he is on and in front of whom he is. If a woman’s strategy is to lose her mask in the end, to disincarnate, presenting to the male gaze her unsightly and traumatic perversity, passion, melancholy, as, for example, the heroines of Lars von Trier do, then the macho man, on the contrary, persists and insists on yours to the end. He simply cannot refuse this role because he is her equal.

“To be a man means to want women,” says the macho man. This is his credo, and this is his delusion and tragedy. And if you don’t want anyone, are you still a man? That is the question. Therefore, most men worry not about their attractiveness, virility or potency, but about whether they will continue to want after they have all been able. This anxiety partly explains the fact that the macho abandons all the girls he seduces after the first night of love: he is not sure that he still has desire, he does not know what can connect him with a woman after he is with her got laid.

While female sexuality does not operate in the categories of “fuck - lose”, “hit - miss”, in the strict sense, it does not want anything from a man at all. That is why a woman changes masks so easily and fits into any desires of her partner, although she herself does not experience them and does not need them. A man must constantly warm up these desires in himself (even at the cost of pain and suffering), create the illusion of satisfaction and cultivate more and more sophisticated desires. In this sense, men are better actors than women: they take everything at face value and play machismo completely sincerely, they live it and are ready to give everything for it. For them, this is not a game, but life itself.

Therefore, condemning a macho or preventing him means playing by his rules, forcing him to defend his right to exist. For this reason, feminist demarches and psychological interpretations beneficially feed the macho symptom. Aggressive female attacks are the best declaration of love...

NP: What about a macho man in a skirt?

D.O.: Do you mean lesbians who copy macho behavior? Or women who change men?

NP: Women who have many lovers. Although with lesbians is also an interesting option.

D.O.: Women have a completely different story: if they make up a collection of lovers, then this is again a parody, a farce. A woman plays at machismo, creating an exquisite trap for male desire. One of my friends, for example, kept such a Don Juan list, which consisted of only two columns: in one of them the man’s name was written, in the other - the size of his penis. Everything is to the point, nothing superfluous. The comical nature of this document was so obvious that as soon as the man found out about its existence, all desire in him was “lowered.” Of course, being measured and included in an inventory, like warehouse rubbish, is not so pleasant. In any case, you need to have a certain amount of self-irony in order to have an affair with such a girl. Such a list does not look like hussar bragging, but like a test of stress resistance for potential suitors; it’s as if a woman is testing a man, playing the role of a “macho man in a skirt” in front of him.

In turn, a woman dreams of meeting a macho man who would give her something that is not associated with obligations and demands, devoid of feelings and sentimentality, so as soon as the macho man falls in love, the woman immediately leaves him. Some women get the pleasure of dating married men who, on top of that, truly love their wife, precisely so that the desire will be addressed to another woman. And as soon as the unlucky gentleman mentions a divorce or even that he no longer sleeps with his wife, his mistress immediately breaks up with him.

So, if for a man “calculation” is destructive (he loses desire if it turns out that someone else already wanted the same thing), then for a woman, on the contrary, to have such a lover who sleeps with a good dozen others like him you may turn out to be especially sweet.

NP: Can Don Juan and Casanova be called macho male archetypes?

D.O.: Male sexuality is fueled by many images. Please note that I am not talking about a psychotype or character, but rather about a written script, so there is no escape from literary examples. Don Juan, Lovelace, Casanova, macho - these are completely different codes, different men's stories, ways of relating to women and collecting their identity. Lovelace, for example, is simply a criminal character, a pervert obsessed with erotomania, ready to create a complex criminal network for the sake of possessing a woman; You don't see this often. Casanova is a completely different image, Fellini portrays him as a misunderstood romantic, a naturalist of human souls, Don Juan is a completely different story, which has a lot of nuances depending on the author. Therefore, I am far from describing the macho archetype and, therefore, giving any one arch-recipe or arch-advice on how to deal with them. Each man has to create his own story, write his own relationship novel, taking into account women's perception of the cynical macho man.

IN THE MOVIE AS IN LIFE

Women in love with macho men are ready to do anything. For example, the heroine of the film “Dangerous Liaisons,” played by Catherine Deneuve, knows perfectly well who Valmont is, what fame he enjoys and what an affair with such a womanizer could turn out for her, but this does not stop her at all, and she quite consciously embarks on the path victim and plays this role to the end. Moreover, it is her sacrifice that becomes what Valmont cannot pass by. Only after becoming scolded and crushed does she become the object of his passion, and he falls in love with her at the end of the novel. The hook is thrown absolutely correctly: the macho cannot pass by the fallen virtue, past the woman who is ready to become a thing for him. As a rule, women are not at all afraid of being used by a macho man simply because they are looking for something completely different from him. They test his boundaries: to what extent a macho can be a cold cynic and to what extent he can be an object in this love game. Men, as a rule, cannot stand it for long, melt and give up, just like the main character of the film, Viscount de Valmont. The role of a sadist is too much for many men to handle.

We are accustomed to perceiving men as supermen who are not afraid of anything in the world and can handle anything. However, it turns out that a man’s head is full of fears that are not always clear to the opposite sex. What makes a real man nervous? Why, looking at a beautiful, self-sufficient woman, does he often experience fear rather than admiration? Boys are taught from childhood that they must be strong and courageous and have no right to be weak. However, it turns out that they are ordinary people who are also scared. What are real men afraid of?

What fears overcome men?

Even though men tend to take risks often, participating in extreme sports or working in dangerous jobs, there are a lot of fears hidden in their strong souls. Women do not always realize that a man can be afraid of something; they are used to the fact that a man is an unbending support.

However, despite such prevailing opinions, our stronger sex is also not always confident in its actions and men, just like us, need understanding and support.

So let's figure out what a real macho is afraid of.

Men are afraid to take the first step when meeting people

The fear of being rejected or not being liked by the lady of your dreams is deeply embedded in the skull of the modern man. Often the first meeting is more stressful for a man than losing his favorite team or getting fired from his job. Fear of not being enough:

• handsome,
• smart
• sexy,
• secured, etc.

often does not allow him to relax and just get to know a woman. So if a woman sometimes takes the lead in this matter, it only helps them move forward in the relationship.

A beautiful woman is the most terrible “beast” for a man

From the first fear, the second immediately follows: the more beautiful the girl, the more the man will avoid her. In addition, if a woman is also, in addition, smart and self-confident, she has almost no chance of meeting a man. Looking at such a person, even the most notorious macho feels like a first-grader on the principal's carpet.

In addition, for centuries the concept has been ingrained in the minds of men that a beautiful woman:

• not serious
• she has many better and richer fans,
• she only wants money from him,
• she's been busy for a long time
• will refuse him immediately, etc.

Cheating is the greatest fear of any man

The man's world is quite cruel. A man often has to compete with his business partners or football friends. Therefore, a man looks for devotion and fidelity in his woman. From which it follows that the stronger sex is afraid of the betrayal of the woman they love like fire.

A man who has experienced his girlfriend’s betrayal becomes very vulnerable and may become depressed or even lose his virility. Against this background, men tend to worry that their friends might like their girlfriend or talk to her ex-boyfriend.

The irresponsibility of men is not a whim

It is a rare man who enters into a serious relationship (gets married) without a certain feeling of fear. The fear of losing their independence and autonomy and falling under their wife’s thumb makes them often refuse marriage and the opportunity to have children. Only the desire to make the lady of his heart happy can force him to compromise.

Also losing his freedom, a man is most often forced to change his lifestyle and habits. He ends up losing his personal space, and not everyone is capable of this.

Fear of not succeeding in your career

For a man, self-realization and success in the professional sphere are the key to his stability and success. Fear of not achieving financial heights and set goals dates back to the depths of centuries, when men hunted mammoths.

The fear of losing a reputation that has been built up over many days and months, and into which so much work has been invested, is very serious for a man.

To be considered a loser among friends and family is a big blow to his pride.

Fear of being unsuccessful in bed

The main indicator of male strength has always been considered its healthy potency. If a man faces problems in this sensitive issue, his self-esteem drops sharply, and a feeling of insecurity and inability in his abilities appears. It is very important for every man to feel like a real male.

There are myths that a man should be in combat readiness under any circumstances. This is referenced in rude male jokes and films for adults based on generally accepted stereotypes of thinking. But they forget that the main strength of a man is to give his woman peace of mind and protection from any adversity.

And how do you help men get rid of fears, share it on the site.

When women hear the word “macho,” they immediately imagine the man of their dreams: strong, brave, brutal. Representatives of the stronger sex usually have before their eyes a picture of an alpha male, with a huge number of beauties falling at his feet. So what kind of men are called macho?

Origin of the word

The term came to us from Spain. Initially in Spanish macho is a bull. Today this word has acquired many meanings in Spanish, it all depends on the context of its use.

• The literal translation is "male". However, it is rarely used as a swear word.
• Also, sometimes any man is called macho, regardless of the degree of his masculinity and brutality.
• Macho de cabrio is an asshole. However, such a translation is familiar only to those who know all the intricacies of Spanish, or to manufacturers and suppliers of woolen clothing.

In relation to gender, the word "macho" was first used to describe a striking man of Latin American or Mediterranean appearance: attractive, sexy, tall, brown-haired or brunette. The term quickly spread across the Mediterranean, and then across the globe, ending up in Russia.

In each language this word is interpreted differently:

• In modern English it means nothing more than “one hundred percent male.”
• And in America, for example, macho is a dirty word. There is nothing worse than hearing from an American woman after a date: “You are macho.” This is the same if a Russian woman says to her boyfriend: “You are a pig.”
• Here, as in England, many consider the word “macho” to be synonymous with “real man.”

Macho in Russian

Any Russian woman wants to see a macho man in her man. But to become one, the poor young man must literally become a “superman”, who combines the incongruous:

• masculinity;
• intelligence;
• beauty;
• sexuality;
• intelligence;
• romanticism;
• charisma and charm;
• gallantry.

Do you already understand why there are so few Russian machos?

Alpha Male Wardrobe

A real macho - not only inside, but also outside. Sometimes he seems to look a little careless. In fact, such a man’s wardrobe should be thought out to the smallest detail. How do charming brutals dress?

• Shirt. There are never too many shirts, so a macho man’s wardrobe should include a large number of them. There is no need for a tie or jacket; just unbutton the top button of your shirt and roll up your sleeves. Ready!
• Jeans. A man in jeans looks more attractive, so trousers have no place in the wardrobe of an alpha male. However, there is an exception. Light-colored trousers, tapered at the bottom, are acceptable. An important accessory is a leather belt, preferably black.
• Shoes. Sneakers should be put in the far corner, or better yet, given to a teenage boy. Boots, shoes or boots with low heels are what a macho man needs. White shoes are the best choice.
• Accessories. Expensive watches, black glasses, massive chains are the best things that “give off” a real macho in an ordinary man.

Appearance

The fashion for blond, blue-eyed princes is a thing of the past. A real macho is necessarily a brunette with dark skin. But this is not enough. What else does a conqueror of ladies' hearts need to have?

• Bristle. It’s not worth growing a twenty-centimeter beard and a curled mustache like yours (although no one doubts the attractiveness of Agatha Christie’s character). Two to three days of stubble is enough.
• Hairiness. Here all the questions are for Mother Nature. It is believed that they are doubly sexy. There is no need to hide the hair on your chest and arms (do you understand why you should unbutton the top buttons of your shirt and roll up your sleeves?)
• Relief body. There is no need to build up huge muscle mass, but maintaining yourself in good physical shape is a must. The “beer belly” has never had a positive effect on any woman.

The character of a real macho

A man must be raised from childhood, Russian mothers decided. They literally tell their sons from the cradle: “Don’t do that, you’re a boy.”

How should a real man behave, according to beautiful ladies? They believe that a macho is beautiful not only on the outside, but also on the inside, so he must:

• Don't "make a fuss". Lamentations, and even more so tears, are a taboo for a real man.
• Make decisions quickly. A man is able to solve problems himself and take responsibility for the decisions made.
• It’s not for nothing that they say: “A man said it, a man did it.”
• Conquer at first sight. Another macho motto: “I came. I saw. I won.” Even the most fastidious lady should not resist the handsome man.

Myths about macho

A macho is more of a fictitious image than a real person. Behind external masculinity there can be hidden both a truly man with a core of steel and a completely opposite nature.

In order not to mislead either girls or boys, we will try to dispel some myths regarding the life and behavior of any macho man, including the Russian one.

Myth 1: a macho man can drink alcohol unlimitedly

It is believed that a real man is capable of drinking a very large amount of alcohol. In fact, alcohol intoxication does not make a man sexier, more masculine, or more attractive. The maximum program is one or two glasses of beer. If you drink more, let alone go on weekly binges, there will be no trace left of your health and sexuality.

Myth 2: Macho men like to drive fast

Driving fast has never done anyone any good, neither fragile women nor large men. The outcome of accidents involving unreasonable drivers and street racers is always the same. It's even sadder that innocent people suffer from them. There is no point in surprising everyone around you with your ability to maneuver at high speed; this will not make you a magnet for women.

Myth 3: machos have iron health

This myth comes from the “one hundred percent men” themselves. They believe that going to the doctor is for the weak. However, neglecting preventive examinations and ignoring minor illnesses can lead to the situation getting out of control, and your lifestyle will have to be changed forever.

Myth 4: Macho men have nerves of steel

You should not think that a vulnerable soul cannot be hidden behind the external calm of a man. The macho always tries to be calm, overcomes pain and psychological trauma by gritting his teeth. But if you always keep your emotions and experiences to yourself, not only your nerves, but also your health can fail.

Myth 5: a real man only eats meat

The life expectancy of men is already significantly shorter than that of women, and poor nutrition only makes the situation worse. If you eat only fatty meat and lard, snacking on it with a large piece of bread, then you will have neither a sculpted figure nor healthy organs. Any self-respecting young man should eat a balanced diet. Fruits and vegetables are necessary components of any person’s menu.

Myth 6: Such a sexy man has a lot of women

Sexual relationships are a necessary part of the life of not only a macho man, but also of any normal man. However, frequent changes of partners are not a guarantee of success. Rather, on the contrary, there is an additional risk. Sexually transmitted diseases are a serious danger that awaits those who change partners like gloves. Moreover, contraception will not protect against the threat of disease 100 percent.

Myth 7: a real macho man must train hard in the gym every day

In pursuit of a beautiful body, some men forget that quick results are fraught not only with excessive physical exertion, but also with nervous strain. It is better to choose slow, stable growth than to “rape” your body.

Myth 8: a macho man enjoys smoking a pipe during a break between love affairs

A real man is not lazy. In the modern world it is simply impossible to survive without doing anything. Hard work makes any member of the stronger sex courageous; in addition, career success allows you to assert yourself and feel important.

Myth 9: a macho man is always lucky in love

But no. American researchers have found that among handsome macho men there are almost 1.5 times more divorced and single men.

And finally, some useful tips. Recommendations for girls: don’t chase external attractiveness and don’t try to make a macho out of your boyfriend, look deeper and get more. Advice to men: do not try to be wildly popular with women, making every effort to do so. A huge number of fans is not a guarantee of happiness and life satisfaction in the future.

The Latin American slang word "macho" has a Russian equivalent - a real man. Representatives of the stronger sex pronounce the word macho phrase with a respectful intonation, women - with aspiration and some awe of the strength and assertive sexuality of the owner of such a characteristic.

What does macho mean?

Meanwhile Literally translated, "macho" means nothing more than... "bull". The cruel, wild, powerful animal became, as it were, the personification of the masculine principle, its untamed natural essence. However, it is impossible not to mention that in addition to the unbridled temper and aggressiveness, the bull is characterized by some primitiveness and rudeness.

The same traits can be found in his human counterpart. From childhood future macho knows that it is not proper for him to whine, complain and spread “calf tenderness” like girls. A real man is alien to reflection, all sorts of poems about tender love and separation, empty sentiments and reflections on the meaning of existence. All this “pink drool” is for weaklings. Macho motto uncomplicated and simple: “I came, I saw, I conquered!” Guided by this principle, macho knows, how to seduce a girl and easily defeat enemies, take impregnable fortresses by storm and, as if jokingly, conquer women’s hearts.

What is the secret of macho

What is the secret of these uncouth louts, rude, unrestrained and self-confident types? The whole point is that macho represents a woman’s dream of a strong man, a real male, extracted from the recesses of the subconscious and materialized. The hypertrophied masculinity of the partner favorably sets off and emphasizes her weakness and feminine grace. It would seem that, macho is an example of an ideal man. Where, then, do the pessimistic rumors that predict the end of the “era of machismo” come from?

The twenty-first century is a time of a final change of priorities. Mind and intellect win a convincing victory over brute physical strength. A man who is accustomed to getting his way through forceful arguments risks becoming an anachronism. What does such a forecast allow us to make? Let's take a closer look, starting with the area in which it would seem macho man there are no equals.

Macho is a real man

Macho represents a complete set of stereotypical ideas about a “real man”. Starting from his appearance (pronounced muscularity) to his behavior (hypnotizing power and self-confidence), he is the standard of a super male. His muscular, strong body with narrow buttocks and broad shoulders, respectable genitals, as if specially created to arouse lust in women and the desire to experience the power of his embrace..

Representatives of this category often purposefully improve their body and strive to give it expressive, relief forms. It thus becomes for them another, additional argument and evidence of belonging to the stronger sex.

Psychologists call such men androphiles. A symbol expressing his essence could be an erect penis, since it most fully embodies the idea of ​​his sexual power. Does this mean that an androphilic man is an excellent lover? Yes - if we are talking about the “technical” side of the issue.

A macho man is temperamental, strong, tireless, insatiable.

His sexuality is assertive, very active, and this appeals to women. However, emotionally, he clearly loses to a man of a different, intellectual type. Accustomed from childhood to hiding his tender feelings and perceiving love poems for girls and affection as a kind of weakness, the macho cannot turn sex into a refined game, exquisite pleasure, or fill it with various shades of emotions and sensations. But his “highbrow” opponent, by the way, if desired and depending on the situation, can be anything - passionately impatient and gentle, submissive and domineering, rudely demanding and affectionate.

Macho sexual behavior

The sexual behavior of a macho is a continuation of his life philosophy and view of a woman: he perceives her as something opposite and even hostile in this dissimilarity. Therefore, during sexual intercourse, he does not “love” her or even “have sex”, but “takes”, “conquers”, “possesses” - terms more suitable for describing military action than for an erotic scene. That's why sex with a macho often leaves his partner, who is waiting to hear declarations of passionate love, a feeling of emotional disconnection, and his fixation on his masculinity gives rise to a completely logical question: “If he so obsessively demonstrates to everyone his “coolness,” maybe he is not at all sure of it and is he trying to prove something to himself in this way?

Macho and family

The macho traditionally plays a dominant role in the family hierarchy. He is a breadwinner, breadwinner, protector, and part-time also a household king, accustomed to single-handedly making decisions and deciding the destinies of the household members who depend on him. Such an archaic way of family life, on the one hand, is very convenient for a woman, as it allows her to “not worry” about social upheavals and cataclysms, on the other hand, it requires some humility, self-denial and passivity. If such a model suits a woman, no problems arise, peace and quiet reigns in the family.

However, it is enough to look around to notice that not all contemporaries are ready to be content with the role of the keeper of the hearth, waiting at night for SMS wishes for the night. They have outgrown this outdated model. While remaining loving wives and caring mothers, many of us want to try ourselves in a new role - an active, business and successful woman.

It is not surprising that following this metamorphosis, the balance of power in the family arena changes. Today's women no longer want to look up to men. They strive for a relationship of equal partners and have every right to do so. It's hard to imagine that a successful and self-sufficient woman for a long time She tolerated a man next to her who treated her career and achievements with contemptuous skepticism. Such a union is impossible not because two strong personalities repel like charges of the same name. A strong woman does not need a weak, “feminine” partner. He must be strong, but at the same time tolerant, emotionally flexible, broad-minded and flexible in his psyche - that is, more intellectually developed than a macho man.

However, macho people themselves try to avoid communicating with strong and confident people, because they see them as competitors. Accustomed to feeling like winners by belittling the female personality, such men give in to a worthy opponent with whom such tricks do not work.

Macho and work

Scientists have long established that a man’s intelligence is quite significantly influenced by the level of testosterone in the blood. The higher the level of this masculinity hormone, the lower, alas, the intellectual abilities.

Overflowing with testosterone machos can achieve significant success in those areas where toughness, courage and remarkable physical strength are required. Until recently, when our economy developed according to the wild laws of the jungle, and business resembled fights without rules, such types won their place in the sun.

However, the age of gladiators is coming to an end. It is being replaced by civilized business, in which intelligence plays a key role. If we take into account that a man’s high social position, his status and success are perceived by women as a reflection of masculinity and wealth, then we can say that it is an intelligent, capable of uttering wise quotes and aphorisms without much hesitation, an educated intellectual in the near future will receive increased attention from the fair sex . The concept of a “sex symbol” will thus gradually move further away from the image of Tarzan and acquire more and more intelligent noble features.