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How to tell a man that he is on his period. How to carefully tell a guy about his critical days in various situations

How do I tell my boyfriend that I'm on my period? A question that makes not only teenage girls, but also young girls worry and feel embarrassed. Despite the sexual liberation of modern society, menstruation is still a taboo topic for some of its representatives. How to behave, where to start a conversation?

Teenagers learn about the physiology of the female and male body in high school. Together with the girls, the boys receive minimal knowledge about the natural processes in a woman’s body and become familiar with the concept of menstruation. In the girls' conversation, the topic of menstruation comes up from time to time; there is an active discussion of pads, tampons, and problems with well-being. At the same time, the guys become casual listeners and receive information in this way. When the time comes for the first sexual experience, both partners already know what menstruation is. Therefore, there is no need to inflate the topic of critical days too much.

Why do difficulties arise?

For adult women, the situation with menstruation does not cause any inconvenience. They simply tell their partner about it openly. It is more difficult for girls to tell boys about menstruation, since teenagers' reactions may not be entirely adequate. This is what the female gender is afraid of. However, it is much easier to start a conversation about menstruation if there is mutual understanding and trust between the partners. There is nothing to worry about if the guy doesn’t get what he wants, he’ll wait a few days. On the contrary, she herself will certainly appreciate his caring attitude towards her beloved’s body. At the end of the critical days during sex, the girl will reward her beloved in full for the days of waiting.

The first love, which is often accompanied by the first sexual experience, is not always reciprocated. Some guys simply take advantage of women's trust and meet a girl just for sex. In such situations, menstruation always causes irritation, dissatisfaction and other negative reactions in the partner. If menstruation threw a guy out of balance, he began to be offended, angry, you need to reconsider your attitude towards him, open your eyes to what is happening. Accept the truth, no matter how bitter it may be.

How to tell a guy about your period?

Usually the need for such a conversation arises in a situation where a guy hints through words or actions about sex. A confident girl will simply say: “I can’t, I’m on my period!” Sorry! It's a pity!" Or this option: “I’m having my period, I’ll have to wait a little!” Further events will develop according to several scenarios.

The guy will stop the affection and treat the situation with understanding.
He will say that he is not afraid of blood, menstruation does not bother him. He will continue to insist.
Offer alternative sex.

How should the girl behave next? Every woman has periods
proceed differently. Some people don’t even notice them, feel fine, no problems. Others suffer from abdominal pain, weakness, and bleeding. In the first case, the girl may succumb to temptation and agree to have sex. Moreover, if it’s the first or last day, there is minimal blood. In this case, it is worth worrying about maintaining strict hygiene of both partners before and after sexual intercourse. If these conditions cannot be met, sex will have to be abandoned. You cannot make love if there is severe abdominal pain or bleeding. The answer must be categorical - “No!” Well, as for alternative sex - oral, anal, it's a small matter. Consent must be mutual, no violence against oneself.

Hints work too

You can notify the guy about the current situation long before he begins to act actively. Just say on the phone that you’re not feeling well today. This will be followed by the question: “Why, what happened?” Answer: “Critical days”, “Women’s problems”, “Menstruations”. This issue is closed. The guy will already be informed before the date begins.

Another option is to casually show him a pad or tampons in your purse. The guy will either understand everything silently or start the conversation himself. In this case, you will only have to confirm his suspicions.

If it’s too awkward to talk, you can wait for active action. When the guy starts caressing, he will feel the presence of a pad or tampon in his panties, and everything will become clear. However, in this case, a reproach may follow: “Why didn’t you tell me?” All that remains is to smile and shrug.

Menstruation is a natural process in the female body, there is nothing shameful about it. All grown men understand this, and young men should also enter into the situation. Whether to have sex during menstruation or not is a purely individual question. Sexual intercourse should not cause discomfort to either man or woman.

Interesting video:

Today, many women find it difficult to talk about menstruation, despite the fact that society has long been free to discuss any problems. When it comes to menstruation, girls feel awkward, they are nervous and try to speak quietly, because all over the world there is an opinion that menstruation is always dirty and smells bad. Menstruation is a normal week for every woman and is not something to be ashamed of. It is difficult to talk to the opposite sex about menstruation, but if a relationship with a man is expensive, then it is worth talking about menstruation. And so most girls ask the question: “How to tell a guy that I’m on my period?”

Guys of different ages require a special approach, and sometimes girls behave too relaxed with inexperienced partners, which confuses the latter. This conversation is necessary so that the guy is not offended that the girl avoids sexual contact or behaves aggressively towards him. The guy needs to be prepared for the period when his beloved will have her period.

Conversation with a young guy

Before you talk to a guy about periods, you need to consider the length of the relationship. It is easier to share personal problems with people whom a girl has known for a long time. It’s worth taking into account the guy’s possible reaction. If he has embarrassed a girl in the past or shared similar questions with his friends, then he should refrain from talking about periods.

There must be a reason why a girl wants to tell a guy about her period. She should ask herself whether this somehow affects their relationship, whether she can restrain her emotions and not get angry with the guy. If the answer to these questions is positive, it is definitely worth having a conversation so that the young man knows that he is not to blame for what is happening.

An inexperienced partner should speak carefully and gently about menstruation. When talking, you need to explain that once a month girls experience stomach pain and sudden mood swings. Teenagers especially should not talk in detail about female physiology, much less use scientific terms or euphemisms (“guests have arrived from Krasnodar”, “red days of the calendar”, “the Red Army has arrived”) - the guy will not understand this, you need to speak to him extremely simply and at ease. Some experts advise not to report blood loss, but this depends on the level of trust in the young person.

During the conversation, it is important to remain calm and friendly. Rudeness and aggression will make a guy feel guilty for something that is not his fault. Many girls are also angry because their lover does not know about menstruation, and this often offends guys.

Negative emotions will not help bring the young man up to speed, so you need to relax and not allow emotions to get out of control for a while.

There is nothing strange if a guy becomes embarrassed and avoids continuing the conversation, you should not be offended by this. For young and inexperienced guys, this topic is very sensitive, as it is for many girls. But if a partner begins to behave rudely and says offensive words to the girl, it is necessary to put him in his place and explain that menstruation is not a vice, and it indicates good health.

If during a conversation a guy wants to learn more about menstruation, but the girl is embarrassed to tell, you should invite him to read the information on the Internet.

How to deal with an experienced partner

It’s easier for an adult guy to talk about menstruation, especially if he previously had a relationship with a girl who probably told him about her period. It is advisable to know in advance what to say to the guy and prepare for the conversation. It is not uncommon for girls to begin to worry and stammer, having difficulty finding the right words. During the conversation you need to feel confident and not shy. Psychologists say that by discussing such topics, couples become closer and their trust in each other grows.

There are several ways to report your period:

To speak directly, without describing the details of menstruation, one phrase is enough for an experienced guy to understand everything.
It is permissible to use euphemisms, even a phrase such as: “I have these days” will give the guy enough information and he will not need clarification.
If a girl and a guy have a long-term relationship, they should come up with code words that will indicate the onset of menstruation.

It is especially important to tell your partner about menstruation if the girl and the guy are already having sex. Sexual intercourse is not prohibited during menstruation, although it is considered dirty and sloppy, so the guy may be against it. No less important is the attitude of the girl herself towards having sex during this period. If touching causes her irritation, then it is better to wait until the end of her critical days and refrain from sexual intercourse.

Having sex can be replaced with kissing, hugging or other sexual pleasures. The main thing is not to do what you don’t want. It is easier to explain to an adult partner that during this period some restrictions in sex arise. Many couples prefer not to wait until the end of menstruation and continue to have sex quietly, since during intimacy the girl feels less pain that she experiences during menstruation.

You need to continue to use protection during sex. Menstruation is not a guarantee that a girl will not become pregnant. Sperm remains in a woman's body for 3-7 days, so there is a possibility of fertilization of the egg (especially with a short menstrual cycle or hormonal imbalance). Using condoms will also prevent infection: during menstruation, the risk of viral transmission increases, as the volume of fluid that comes into contact with pathogenic microorganisms increases.

Periods are normal

If, nevertheless, at the thought of telling a guy about menstruation, a feeling of fear and shame arises, then this indicates that the couple does not have a sufficiently trusting and close relationship. The girl should think about this and why she is still afraid to talk about her period.

02.12.2016

I thought I'd hold off on Friday posts discussing various non-cosmetic hot topics until I got my arm back to working properly; but there are things that - as someone smarter than me said - you write about not because you can write about them, but because you can't help but write. This is exactly the case now; and my temporary inability to type quickly will save you from unnecessary water in reasoning, I will try to express my thoughts clearly and concisely.

And yes, I will talk about menstruation. What a terrible and indecent topic, and even on a blog about beauty, Yes? But we have mostly women here, and in a women’s circle there’s no shame in discussing menstruation, right? Of course, sometimes men wander in here too, but I think that they have a good enough reading skill and, having read the title, will wisely leave if the topic offends their better feelings.

Actually, I wanted to start with men. It was a real discovery for me that there are still a lot of men who consider it shameful to buy feminine pads. Seriously?! It's a shame to buy something that is, in fact, dressing material and is required for a person with bleeding? Do they necessarily visualize the process of using pads? Something I have never heard of someone refusing to buy, for example, sea water in cans, which is used to rinse the nose, because this someone immediately imagines running snot. And just imagine, they flow like a stream from this water.

For me, refusing to buy pads for your woman sounds as crazy as, for example, refusing to buy antipyretic suppositories would sound (oh, it’s a shame to even say where they are inserted). And there is no need to ask what it is necessity send a man for pads. Of course, no woman will deliberately bypass the shelf with pads if she knows that she needs to replenish their supply. But if she makes a list of necessary purchases for a man (in many families - including mine - it is the man who most often does the shopping, at least because it is physically difficult to carry bags), then why on earth should we include the paper towels that have run out? is it possible, but running out of gaskets is not? And she may also feel bad (due to the same periods, by the way) and she will need help with going to the store.

Some women, by the way, justified their men’s reluctance to buy pads to me by saying, “Oh, well, he just can’t figure out which ones to buy.” My God, what a bunch of helpless babes. Women are born with knowledge about sanitary pads. And men without a second higher education cannot figure out this complex issue, yes. Guys, a hint: in the era of the Internet and mobile technologies, it’s easy to simply drop a link to the desired product from the manufacturer’s website. And in general - “you can teach a hare to smoke, nothing is impossible for a person with intelligence.”

In reality, the problem is much broader, of course. It's not about shopping alone. The taboo nature of the “menstrual topic” makes one think that we still have one foot stuck in the Middle Ages. Let us recall, for example, the sensational case of Instagram management deleting a photo of a girl during her period - Wonderzine provides a very detailed chronology of events, I will not repeat it.

Leaving aside the questions of whether you personally would publish such a photo (I wouldn’t), and why this Instagram is needed at all, I would like to understand how such a photo is fundamentally different from a photo, for example, of a cut finger posted with the caption: “ Oh, I shouldn’t have imagined myself as a cook”? Both here and there - blood, behind the scenes - pain, the natural reaction of the public - moderate sympathy (moderate, because most of these people do not even know the author of the photo personally). But the mentioned photo caused rejection among many with a delightful justification: “It’s ugly!” Perhaps, so what? Until now, it seems that there has been no provision in the policy of any social network that you cannot publish a photo that not nice or doesn't bring joy!

People share (not necessarily on social networks) both pleasant and not so pleasant things. If you caught a cold and couldn’t speak for two days, losing your voice, you can talk about it publicly. If your period causes such pain that you lose consciousness (a real example) - this is only for a narrow circle of women. By God, sometimes it seems to me that women themselves consider menstruation to be something “unclean” - do we live according to the Old Testament, or what?

“- if a woman has an issue of blood flowing from her body, then she must sit for seven days during her cleansing, and whoever touches her will be unclean until the evening;

- and everything on which she lies to continue her purification is unclean; and whatever it sits on is unclean;

- and whoever touches her bed must wash his clothes and bathe himself in water and will be unclean until the evening;

- and whoever touches any thing on which she sat must wash his clothes and bathe himself in water, and he will be unclean until the evening;

- and if anyone touches anything on the bed or on the thing on which she was sitting, he will be unclean until the evening;

- if her husband sleeps with her, then her uncleanness will be on him; he will be unclean for seven days, and every bed on which he lies will be unclean.”

Old Testament, Leviticus, chapter 15. When I read this at the age of fifteen, I simply seethed with indignation. But if you think about how taboo the topic of menstruation is now, it seems to me that part of our consciousness has slept through all these centuries.

Please do not think that free condemnation of menstruation is a fad. Why are girls at school (and even university) so ashamed to tell their teacher, if he is a man, that they have a stomach ache due to their period and need to leave? You can, of course, go to the first aid station and explain everything to the nurse, get a piece of paper with a signature from her (if she wants to attend to this) and present it to the teacher (again blushing) - but most simply do not want to deal with this. But if blood comes from the nose, then the process of release from school occurs in a matter of minutes!

Let's raise the bar higher: can you take time off at work just like that because of your period? Don't raise your eyebrows, this is a completely normal question. Pain during menstruation is, in fact, contractions. Yes, for some it’s not particularly painful, for others it’s very painful. But no one asks why a woman can’t work during labor, even if in the first hours she is not in much pain?

Let's go further. In advertising of sanitary pads, a situation is often used where a woman with “bad” sanitary pads gets a stain on her trousers, but with “good” sanitary pads she can even walk like a cartwheel. No, I don’t argue, blood stains on clothes are not joyful, but why does a stain on a sleeve cause fear and sympathetic questions, and a stain between the legs causes giggling or embarrassment? What could possibly be funny or awkward about this? This is a problem with physical well-being, with health, in fact.

For me, a real shock was that some couples refuse sex during menstruation - and not for reasons of hygiene, this is still understandable (although in general I can recommend the ideal pair of a condom + an absorbent diaper: in any pharmacy, inexpensive), and therefore that “this is disgusting.” Oh Gods, discharge men are not disgusting, but a woman’s discharge is disgusting?! Of course, it would be more pleasant if everyone only singled out rainbows and fairy dust, but life doesn’t offer that.

Why is it that a bloody sock is quietly placed in the laundry basket, but in many families (not mine!) bloody panties still need to be rolled up and hidden in some kind of bag? Why “Mom, I have a headache, don’t have a pill?” - you can say out loud, but “Mom, I’m on my period, don’t have a pill?” Is it spoken in a whisper or behind the door? Just the other day, my daughter, explaining why she wouldn’t go to physical education class, said indignantly: “Hey, I’m on my period!” with the whole family. And to be honest, I’m proud that she’s not embarrassed.

I have a runny nose.
I have an open fracture.
I have conjunctivitis.
I have dermatosis.

All this, to be honest, is unpleasant to visualize. But in modern society, it seems to me, it should be indecent and inhumane to stigmatize physical ailments: pain, suffering, discomfort. I don’t encourage you to shout about your periods (or about your runny nose), but let’s somehow take this condition out of the “indecent” zone.

It's completely normal to refer to your period when explaining how you feel unwell. It’s completely normal to show a photo with a blood stain on leggings (people show damaged things). It's completely normal to send a man to get pads.

My God, how long will it take to explain that being a woman is normal?!

For every girl, critical days are a common everyday thing. You quickly get used to it and you don’t feel embarrassed at all when speaking among girls. But it’s a completely different matter when you need to tell your boyfriend about your period. During these days, the girl often experiences mood changes. And the guy needs to know about this so that he doesn’t get offended by actions for which we are currently not responsible.

First, think about whether it’s worth talking about. How will this affect your relationship? Perhaps he already knows or guesses?! If this is so, then maybe it’s not worth talking about. But if you have sudden changes in mood, you can be offended by him for no reason at the present time - it’s worth telling. He must be ready and must know that there is a reason for this. And that you still love him and are telling him to warn him. So that if something like this happens so that it does not have an impact on your relationship. You can tell your guy about your period gently. For example, explain that at a certain period, girls’ stomachs begin to ache and at this time feelings and emotions become more intense. You don't have to talk about your blood loss. It would be unnecessary.

If a guy knows about menstruation

If a guy knows what menstruation is, then you don’t have to try and tell him about it directly. Just say: “I’m having these days, I’m not feeling well,” or “I have guests, if you know what I mean.” Then he himself will understand everything and will probably either turn the topic into a joke or won’t remember it anymore. If you met a guy not yesterday, and you have become close to each other, then you can tell him how best to behave with you at this time. This will help both him and you. If he knows how to deal with you correctly, then you will have less nerves and philosophical thoughts about why he did what he did.

If you live an intimate life with a guy, you can directly tell him about your period. He knows what it is and how to behave with you at this time. You can ask him how he feels about this and discuss this topic to avoid inconvenience in the future.

passioninyou.ru

Menstruation - how to tell a guy about it

This moment may embarrass you, but believe me, every woman has gone through this. This is not at all as terrible as it might seem at first glance.

There is absolutely no shame in discussing the menstrual cycle as part of the amazing structure of the female reproductive system. Despite the liberated nature of our society, very few women can freely discuss the topic of menstruation, usually such conversations make us nervous and lower our voices. After all, women live in a male society that tells us that menstruation is a dirty period, it is shameful, taboo, a curse. But patriarchy only came into our society about 5,000 years ago. Before this, women were revered as the head of the family, as deities. Women noted the connection of the menstrual cycle with the phases of the Moon, and we know that the foundations of astronomy, the development of the calendar and mathematics are associated with these same phases.

1. Approach the situation carefully if your boyfriend is a teenager of 13-14 years old.

At this age, boys are poorly acquainted with physiology and issues of tact. Don't use words that seem too scientific. Say it as casually as possible.

2. If the guy is older, it makes things a little easier.

Surely he already had a girlfriend who talked to him about periods. Talking to him about these things is a step forward in your relationship, as there will be more trust and understanding. Don't be too shy - it's inappropriate and will disrupt the conversation.

3. Speak softly

Don't appear angry or be rude. In this case, he may feel guilty that it is not up to him or that he should have known but had no idea.

4. Use terms that won't make you blush.

But it’s also impossible to say nothing or vague synonyms.

5. If you are afraid to tell your guy about your period, then most likely your relationship is not that close, think about it.

6. If you're going to have sex, tell them you're on your period.

You must set boundaries on what is allowed, your body must be comfortable. Keep in mind that some religions have a negative attitude towards women during this period, and you should be sure that your boyfriend will take the situation in stride.

7. Above all, trust him!

There will be nothing wrong if you discuss everything calmly.

Hints

Do not use incomprehensible expressions or jargon, the guy may not understand them and the conversation will turn out to be crumpled and incomprehensible, which will lead to the fact that you will look strange in his eyes.

Don't be afraid to trust him! Menstruation is not a problem, but simply part of intimate life.

Remember: menstruation is completely natural and nothing to be ashamed of!

If you've been dating for a while and the guy is old enough, you can just say, "Not right now, I'm having those days" or something similar.

Do not tell in detail your feelings and all the side effects. This will most likely push him away.

If your relationship is just beginning, then you should not talk about menstruation in advance.

lovler.net

How to tell a guy I'm on my period

Today, many women find it difficult to talk about menstruation, despite the fact that society has long been free to discuss any problems. When it comes to menstruation, girls feel awkward, they are nervous and try to speak quietly, because all over the world there is an opinion that menstruation is always dirty and smells bad. Menstruation is a normal week for every woman; it is not something to be ashamed of. It is difficult to talk to the opposite sex about menstruation, but if a relationship with a man is expensive, then it is worth talking about menstruation. And so most girls ask the question: “How to tell a guy that I’m on my period?”

Conversation with a young guy

During the conversation, it is important to remain calm and friendly. Rudeness and aggression will make a guy feel guilty for something that is not his fault. Many girls are also angry because their lover does not know about menstruation, and this often offends guys.

Negative emotions will not help bring the young man up to speed, so you need to relax and not allow emotions to get out of control for a while.

If during a conversation a guy wants to learn more about menstruation, but the girl is embarrassed to tell, you should invite him to read the information on the Internet.

How to deal with an experienced partner

There are several ways to report your period:

To speak directly, without describing the details of menstruation, one phrase is enough for an experienced guy to understand everything.
The use of euphemisms is allowed, even a phrase such as: “I have these days” will give the guy enough information and he will not need clarification.
If a girl and a guy have a long-term relationship, they should come up with code words that will indicate the onset of menstruation.

Periods are normal

drlady.ru

How to properly tell a guy about your period

Menstruation is the result of a natural process in the body of every girl who has already passed puberty. Thus, the uterus gets rid of the exfoliated endometrium and unfertilized egg. The topic of menstruation can be calmly discussed with your mother, friends and your gynecologist, but many representatives of the fair sex are ashamed to tell their boyfriend about the arrival of menstruation.

How do guys really feel about women's periods? Is it worth devoting them to such a sensitive topic? How to tell your boyfriend about your period to avoid feelings of shame and embarrassment? You will find the answer to these and many other questions in this article.

How men feel about periods

Since menstruation is an integral process in the life of every sexually mature woman, you should learn to correctly report its arrival to your sexual partner. Not every man is sexually liberated and can adequately perceive the information that his beloved has begun monthly bleeding. How guys feel about menstruation in adulthood largely depends on their upbringing in the family. If this topic was never touched upon by the boy’s parents during sex education, then as an adult he may have exaggerated fantasies and fears about menstruation. A man’s sexual partner will suffer from his lack of education, from whom he will begin to isolate himself and avoid him during his menstrual periods.

Read Nutrition Basics During Menstruation

The extremely negative attitude towards menstruation on the part of guys can be explained by widespread stories that at this time the girl is very aggressive, suspicious and emotionally unstable. Due to the truly unpleasant symptoms of premenstrual syndrome, negative opinion has also affected the topic of menstruation.

Depending on their age, men have different attitudes towards the arrival of their significant other’s periods. Until the age of 30, most guys are upset by the impossibility of intimate intimacy, while a quarter of respondents, on the contrary, are happy about the opportunity to experiment with sex during this period. 20% of guys under 30 use their girlfriend’s period as a reason for cheating and as an excuse to relax with friends, and 15% take a break from a hectic sex life.

Men after 30 years of age, in 30% of cases, are glad that during their period they have the opportunity to have a reasonable break from fulfilling marital duties, and only in 20% of cases are they upset because of collapsed plans for an intimate relationship. 10% of men avoid and fear a woman who has started her period, this is a fairly large percentage, but if you and your partner have a trusting relationship, then after a frank conversation the situation can improve. It is important to correctly convey information about the naturalness of the menstrual process and its importance in the life of every woman, while it is necessary to use the right psychological approach to a man so as not to alienate him.

Is the topic of menstruation taboo?

In different eras and in different cultures, the attitude towards menstruation was twofold: on the one hand, women during this period were credited with supernatural abilities, and on the other hand, they were considered “dirty” and were not allowed to visit public places. In some nationalities, a woman became an outcast during her period; she ate from a separate bowl, did not talk to anyone and did not touch anyone. This attitude towards critical days still exists in some backward tribes, although even a quarter of a century ago in developed countries, the majority of people during a survey said that under no circumstances should the topic of menstruation be mentioned in the presence of a man.

Read Causes of odor during, before and after menstruation

Psychologists say that an inadequate reaction on the part of a man to the fact that a girl’s period came may be associated with a fear of blood, as well as with a hostile attitude towards everything incomprehensible and unusual. If your young man did not receive normal sex education in childhood, and his parents did not explain to him that menstruation is a physiological process, you should tell him about the characteristics of the female body. A loving and understanding partner will not isolate himself or avoid a woman, knowing that menstruation is natural.

How to tell a guy about red days

It is unlikely that anyone would want to deliberately bring up the topic of menstruation in a conversation with their partner, but there are situations when it is better to tell your boyfriend that you are on your period:

if a young man sees your secrecy and isolation and suspects that you are deceiving him;
if you are planning to spend time together on the beach, in the pool or some kind of sporting event related to weight lifting;
the guy hints at intimacy;
if you have emotional swings, you are overly irritated, and this is very noticeable to your boyfriend.

If you are not in a close, trusting relationship with a young man, you can not initiate him into the intricacies of your situation, but refer to illness and reschedule plans for another day. But if you trust each other, then it is better to inform the guy about the arrival of menstruation, perhaps his sympathy and care will help cope with the emotional discomfort of this period. In this regard, very often a girl wonders, how exactly to inform a young man about the arrival of her critical days?

Read How not to leak these days

Teenager

In adolescence, guys hardly need to explain all the intricacies of how the female body works, especially since such a topic can greatly confuse and scare them away. Just mention the arrival of your period casually, without focusing attention on it. Do not use allegorical or complex medical terms during the conversation and ask him not to tell his friends about this conversation.

Guy 15-20 years old

At this age, it is easier to explain to a guy the essence of the processes occurring in a woman’s body during menstruation, because he has already received basic knowledge in biology lessons or from parents and friends. You can think about the conversation in advance, choose simple terms, avoiding rudeness and harshness.

Over 20

You can talk to older men about menstruation directly and without allegory. An understanding partner will support and help alleviate the condition, and in some cases will simply give you the opportunity to relax and be alone. At a more mature age, you don’t need to think long about how to tell a guy about your period; usually he already knows and understands everything himself; a subtle hint is enough.

To help your conversation with your guy about periods go smoothly and with a positive reaction, use a few tips:

communicate with a teenager 13-14 years old as delicately as possible;
with an older guy, don’t be shy and communicate confidentially;
speak softly without vague terms and synonyms;
if you are afraid to tell your guy about your period, it means your relationship is not too close;
Be sure to warn your partner about your period before sex so that it does not become an unpleasant surprise for him.

Read Causes of itching and burning in vagina during menstruation

First of all, you need to trust your partner, then the question of whether you need to tell him about your critical days will not even arise.

“I dream of a future in which menstruation is not a curse, not a disease, but a natural change in a girl’s life.”

0:11
Period. Blood. Menstruation. Indecent. Secret. Hide. Why?

0:23
A natural biological process that every girl and woman experiences every month for about half of her life. A phenomenon so significant that the survival and reproduction of our species depends on it. But this topic is considered taboo. We are uncomfortable and ashamed to talk about it.

0:46
When I had my first period, I was told to keep it a secret from everyone else, even my father and brother. Then, when we got to this chapter in the biology textbooks, our biology teacher skipped it.

1:03
Do you know what I realized then? I realized that it was very embarrassing to talk about this. I was taught to be ashamed of my body. I remained ignorant about periods for the sake of keeping up appearances.

1:17
Studies in various parts of India have shown that three out of ten girls do not know what menstruation is when they get their first period. And in some parts of Rajasthan the rates are incredibly high - 9 out of 10 girls don't know about it. You'd be surprised that most of the girls I've talked to who didn't know about periods when they first got them thought they had blood cancer and were going to die.

1:47
Personal hygiene during menstruation is a very important risk factor for the development of genital tract infections. But in India, only 12% of girls and women have access to sanitary products during their periods. If you count, 88% of girls and women use unhygienic methods during their periods.

2:08
I was one of them. I grew up in a small town called Garhwa in Jharkhand, where it was considered shameful to even buy sanitary napkins. And when I started getting my period, I started using rags. After each use I washed them and used them again. But in order to store them, I had to hide them in a dark, damp place so that no one would know that I was on my period. Constant washing caused the rags to become rough and caused me to get frequent rashes and infections.

2:39
I used them for 5 years until I moved from that town. Other problems I had with my periods were the societal restrictions that were placed on girls and women during their periods. I think you all know them, but I'll list them for those who don't know.

3:01
I was forbidden to touch or eat the pickles. I was not allowed to sit on the sofa or the beds of any family members. I had to wash my sheets after every period, even if there were no stains on them. I was considered “unclean” and was forbidden to worship or touch religious objects. You may see signs outside temples that prohibit girls or menstruating women from entering.

3:28
It's funny that most often the oldest woman imposes these restrictions on the younger girls in the family. After all, they grew up accepting these restrictions as the norm. And in the absence of intervention, this myth, this false concept is passed on from generation to generation.

3:50
Over the years of my work in this field, I have even come across cases where girls had to eat and wash their dishes separately. They were not allowed to take a bath during their periods, and in some homes they were even isolated from the rest of the family. Approximately 85% of girls and women in India follow at least one restriction every time they menstruate. Can you imagine what happens to a young girl's self-esteem and self-confidence? The psychological trauma inflicted negatively affects her personality, academic performance, and every aspect of growing up during her formative years.

4:32
I followed all these taboos and traditions religiously for 13 years, until a conversation with my partner, Tuhin, changed the way I thought about menstruation forever. In 2009, Tukhin and I were finishing our design studies at the university. We fell in love and I easily discussed periods with him. Tukhin knew little about them.

5:02
He was amazed to learn that girls have painful cramps and that we bleed every month.

5:10
Yes. He was shocked to learn the restrictions placed on women and girls during their periods by their families and society. To help me cope with the cramps, he decided to learn more about menstruation on the Internet. When he shared his discoveries with me, I realized how little I knew about menstruation. And many of my beliefs turned out to be false.

5:37
And then he thought: if we, such educated people, knew so little about menstruation, then whole millions of girls are also ignorant. To study and understand this issue better, I spent a year researching the lack of awareness about periods and the reasons behind it.

5:58
It is generally believed that ignorance or misconceptions about menstruation are a purely rural phenomenon, but during my research, I found that the same thing happens in cities. This also happens among educated urban residents. In talking with many parents and teachers, I found that many of them wanted to talk to girls about periods before their periods even started. But... they themselves didn’t know how to do it. Since the topic is taboo, they felt embarrassed and ashamed to talk about it.

6:37
Today, girls start menstruating in sixth and seventh grade, but our educational program doesn't teach them about it until they're in eighth or ninth grade. And because it is taboo, teachers still skip the topic.

6:55
The school does not give girls this knowledge, and parents do not do this either. Where should they go? Two decades ago and now, nothing has changed. I shared this with Tuhin, and we thought: what if we could create something that would help girls learn about menstruation on their own, something that would help parents and teachers feel comfortable talking about it with girls?

7:28
During my research, I collected many stories. Stories about girls' experiences during menstruation. These stories would arouse curiosity and interest in girls, and they would talk about menstruation among close friends. That's what we wanted. We wanted to get them interested so they would want to know more. We wanted to use these stories to educate girls about periods.

7:56
And we decided to create a comic book where the characters would play out these stories and tell girls about menstruation in a fun and exciting way. To show girls at different stages of maturation, we have three characters. Pinky, who has not yet had her period, Jia, who begins her period during the course of the story, and Meera, who has already had her first period. There is also a fourth character, Priya Didi. With its help, girls learn about different aspects of growing up and personal hygiene during menstruation.

8:31
When making the book, we made sure that these illustrations did not raise questions or any objections, and also took into account cultural characteristics. When testing the sample, the girls really liked the book. They were passionate about learning more and more about periods on their own. Parents and teachers felt comfortable talking about periods with girls who had read the book, and sometimes even boys showed interest in the book.

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