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Signs that a man is using a woman. Loves or uses: find out the true motives of a man

Hello dear readers! We are meeting with different people and some of us need something. There is nothing wrong. Humanity basically survived thanks to mutual aid. Someone went to war, for the sake of the future of all children, others work in factories so that we receive some benefits, others graduate from medical institutes, pedagogical universities. In general, each little by little brings some benefit.

But sometimes we meet a person who is constantly: either help with repairs, then listen to the problem, then give money, then come and pick it up, then write a report. We cannot refuse and at first it seems that in principle everything is fine, work in a team. When we need help, a person will immediately drop his business and do whatever is necessary. Does this always happen in reality?

Today we will talk about how to understand that friends, a girl, a young man or a work colleague are using you for their own purposes. You will learn how to relate to this and what to do if you have no desire to succumb to provocations and become an eternal assistant.

I will tell you what knowledge in the field of psychology helps to find a way out of this situation, if you don’t like it at all. Perhaps we will start with this.

Manipulation is not magic

It is hard to deny that manipulators exist and can influence the person they are interested in. I already talked about. Many of them work successfully and force a person to do what he does not seem to want.

However, you should not treat the person who manipulates you as a magician, and his methods as magic. It's not in your best interest.

Once in a situation where people have to do what they seem to not want, psychologically they begin to defend themselves and justify their weaknesses. They do not talk about the fact that they simply cannot say “no” to a person, but accuse him of knowing secret techniques KGB, FSB, FBI, NLP and so on.

By the way, if you believe in all this, then the book may be interesting for you. Leonid Kayum " Secret Methods KGB. Psychocodes and sound codes of success, wealth, health". I think that you have already understood how faith is connected with benefit. We will return to this issue.

How to become a victim

The truth is that only those who allow it can be manipulated. Each of us is able, but not everyone has enough determination for this. We become shy, embarrassed, we find various tricks, and then we blame the other for wasting our time and failing to be resilient.

Imagine a girl decides that for six months she will not enter into intimate relationship with a man. This is not typical for her, before she succumbed to persuasion faster, but she wanted everything to be “correct” this time. Several days pass, and the young man begins to persuade her by various methods.

80% of girls who find themselves in a similar situation, at the moment when a man is persistent, forget about the recently invented principle. Something like the following thoughts arise in their head: “Well, for me this is still not the first time”, “Everyone does this modern women, why do I need these grandmother’s rules”, “What if he can’t stand it and goes to the side” and “6 months ... well, I turned down something, he will run away from me like that.”

At this moment, a woman appears in her head. If initially she wanted to create the impression of a “right” girl, then at some point she changed her mind and the figure of a partner and the fear of losing him became more significant for her.

Of course, time will pass, and she will begin to blame herself for giving in to her desires, but her, in Once again will find an excuse: "It's not my fault, but for my own selfish purposes."

Understand that each person decides for himself what and when to do. No matter how the manipulator does, no matter what he says, the first question that always arises in his head is: “Do I want to do this?” and if you are against it, you will refuse, no matter how hard he insists.

How not to become a victim of manipulation

There is another interesting psychological trick that people so often fall for.

The fact is that our brain cannot independently distinguish reality from illusions. If it seems to us that a person is manipulating us, then he will really have unlimited power over us. We ourselves will endow him with magical powers.

Surely, when you opened this article, you subconsciously knew in which particular person you would look for signs of a manipulator. Now imagine that you are sitting in a cafe or at work and you see this person approaching you. What do you think about in the first minute? It is likely that it will look something like this: “Damn, now he will ask me for something, and as always I will agree. Pass by, pass by, pass by."

You initially, succumb to persuasion and do what you are not interested in. We are the circumstances. That is why the search for evidence that a person is manipulating you is initially fatal.

We will respond differently to the request of two people in the event that one is considered a skillful manipulator, and the second does not matter to us.

In order not to become a victim and always remember your own desires and needs, I would advise you to read the book Kelly McGonigal "Willpower". In it you will find many ways to develop this quality in yourself and learn not to succumb to provocations, to say “No” when you are subconsciously ready for the worst.

That's all for me. See you soon and don't forget to subscribe to the newsletter.

When a man uses a girl unhealthy relationships. If you feel that your favorite guy is showing increased attention to you only at certain moments, this may be evidence that he is not selfish towards you. We bring to your attention an article from which you will find out if your man is using you.

1. You pay for two all the time

Either his salary didn’t arrive on the card on time, or he forgot his wallet, or he bought medicine for his mother, or he spent everything he has on a friend for a gift, right? And even if your expenses are small - well, two hamburgers instead of one, and you ride a taxi together, and you live in your apartment, it’s logical for you to pay utility bills yourself. But, dear, even if your income is higher, this is not a reason to open your wallet always and everywhere! If you pay for a man all the time, he definitely uses you!

2. You temporarily support him with finances.

Based on the previous point, if you have such a relationship, it is logical that you give him pocket money as well. Ah, he has temporary difficulties, he was fired, he is writing a dissertation, he is in search of himself and he is not up to work? Of course, it is more convenient to take the money that is carefully offered to him. Remember - you should never, under any circumstances, give a man your money! First, it just kills him male essence, and secondly, the world is full of men who will gladly take care of you, not to mention themselves.

3. He communicates with you when he needs something.

Do you often not get through to your man? He is constantly busy, he does not want to go to the theater, he also does not want to go out of town on a day off, but as soon as he needs something, does he immediately appear? This is a clear sign that he is manipulating you.

4. He gets passionate and tender at certain times.

Sad to admit, men often fall in love when their libido needs an outlet. That's when he remembers that you are his woman, and, of course, on this "occasion" must obey his passion. Manipulation through sex is disgusting - and when a man does it, doubly unpleasant. It is up to you to decide whether to succumb to his spell and allow him to use you, or still find the strength in yourself to break off such unworthy relationships.

5. You are always to blame

Does your man accuse you of ruining his mood? Says it's your fault he can't find a job? Are you always to blame for your quarrels? Is it your fault that he doesn't want to have sex with you? So this is an ordinary manipulator, in his garden!

6. He never buys you anything.

Do you often buy gifts for him, but he doesn't give you anything? Or once a year on March 8 brings a rose and delivers a long speech on the topic that big bouquets- this is vulgarity and window dressing, but one flower will tell about his feelings more than 25 roses? He definitely needs something from you, but he is not going to give all the best in response.

7. He doesn't care for you

Does he never pick you up at work, does not go shopping with you, does not help in cleaning the apartment, but at the same time assures that he cannot live without you? He definitely can’t - after all, he probably needs you for something. But definitely not in order to take care of you, as a man is supposed to take care of a woman.

8. He doesn't pay attention to your feelings.

Your man is not interested in how you feel, what worries you, what problems do you have? Does he not notice and does not want to notice how he offends you with his behavior? This is another clear sign that he is using you.

otnosheniya.temaretik.com

How to understand that a man is using you

Many women are interested in the question of how to understand that a man is using you. In fact, there is nothing complicated here. Common use begins when there is no mutual exchange of energies, when a man only wants to take, and gives nothing in return. In this case, he is interested in satisfying his own interests, desires, needs. There can be no talk of any sincerity and harmonious relations.

How to know if a man is using you

To understand whether a man is using you, it is worth analyzing the relationship with him. How harmonious are they? In harmonious relationships, there should be an interchange, when not only a woman puts her strength, energy into relationships, but a man does the same.

If relationship building is unilaterally or already in an established family there is no help from a man, he does not want to decide anything, help, there is no return from him, then it is quite likely that there is a fact of use.

How to understand that a man is using a woman

In psychology, there interesting point when one of the partners, for example a woman, invests more in a relationship, for example, takes on a lot of responsibilities, problems, troubles, and this happens unilaterally. Then the man begins to take it for granted and ceases to appreciate it. Hence the situation arises that a man begins to use a woman. He gets used to comfortable conditions when he does not need to decide, do anything, everything is already done for him.

In another case, there is manipulation, in order to obtain the desired, the threat. But the relationship turns into a cold war, when a woman tries her best to please, please, and improve relations. And the answer is dissatisfaction.

In the third case, such relationships can alternate between cold and warm attitude men. When he does not get what he wants, coldness and neglect appear. When he gets what he needs, for a while it can start to get warmer, it’s better to treat him.

In the fourth case, it can be used if the relationship with a woman is built on selfish motives, desires. In this case, you can understand that a man is using you by his attitude, how much he really loves.

Most often, a man begins to use when there is no love, no respect, he loves more than himself, but then he will betray himself.

How to understand if a man loves or uses you

It is quite natural that when a man loves, he will not use it.

In the presence of wonderful feelings the man will

Attentive
caring
Laskov
gentle
Kind
Loving
Sympathizers

If there is no love or it was not there, then the attitude towards the woman will be, as they say, consumer. You can't wait for a man like that.

attention
Help
Compassion
Sympathy
Help
Support

He does not delve into the life of a woman; he needs her to satisfy his needs.

How to understand that a man uses you signs

He often has no time, a lot of work, busy, even to talk. But there is a lot of free time when something is needed. His mood then changes dramatically. He becomes kind, gentle, affectionate. Having received what he wanted, urgent matters appear again and there is no time.

He can beg, beg, sometimes demand that a woman do as he wants. But at the same time, his smile sweet words sound fake and fake.

You can’t wait for help, support from him, he seems to fence himself off from a woman with his life. And her problems, desires, needs do not interest him.

Sometimes he can consider a woman as his property, which must fulfill his whims, desires, while her freedom is limited, controlled.

You may also be treated like a servant. It is convenient for some men to have a woman nearby who knows how to cook deliciously and do household chores. More is not required of her. But her interests are not taken into account. The main thing is to clean and obey her husband.

If the use concerns sexual relations, then a man is characterized by contrasts in behavior. When he wants a woman, he will be affectionate, gentle, sensitive. Having received satisfaction, she is no longer interested in him. And so on until next time.

How to understand what a man wants to use

Understanding what a man wants to use is really difficult. Usually, if a man asks you a lot about his personal life, occupation, work, character, then we can conclude that he is looking for something that you will be useful to him and that he can use for himself.

But on the other hand, such behavior of a man does not always make it clear that a man wants to use you. This may be a completely innocent interest caused by a sincere desire to get to know each other better. Moreover, if he is really interested in a woman, then he will be more interested in her life.

And only with time you can understand what could be behind this interest. To protect yourself from being used by a man, you need to gradually open up. As the relationship develops.

In another case, when family life man puts certain conditions, does something for a man, then in the future the man begins to perceive that she should always do this. But here we must immediately pay attention to everything being built on reciprocity.

How to understand that a married man uses a woman

He is not going to get divorced, leave the family. Not looking for a serious relationship
He needs her only for bed comforts, then he has no time.
He is not going to marry her. Serious questions cause dissatisfaction.
Imposes his will on her, tries to subdue her
He is indifferent to her emotions, desires.
From him there is no support, care, attention
There is no sincerity, love, reciprocity in relationships
How to understand that a man is just using you
He is more focused on himself.
Affectionate and gentle when he needs something
hides a lot
His words don't match his actions.

In general, you can find many signs that make it clear that a man is using you. And in all of them there is exactly the most important thing, no return on the part of the man, the relationship is, as it were, one-sided. Often in the move is on manipulation to persuade, force, coerce, persuade a woman to the desired behavior. But there is no love and care, support from him.

vritmevremeni.ru

How to understand that a man is using you?

Mutual love is beautiful, but there are so many lies and deceit in the world that a woman sooner or later thinks: are feelings mutual? And if not, how to understand that a man is using you?

Not all men communicate with women out of pure motives. It also happens that a man sees in a woman just a sex toy or a cash cow. In this case, it is extremely important to see this fine line between serious intentions and vulgar consumer attitude. If you manage to figure everything out in time, then you can easily release the unfortunate gentleman without becoming his victim. Consider the sure signs that you are being used.

Sex at the forefront

“How to understand that a man is using you?” - This question is very relevant at the very beginning of a relationship. Sometimes a woman can let a man into her bed too quickly. No matter how bitter it is to admit, but at the same time, he may not experience romantic feelings at all. However, he likes to sleep with you. And you believe in the sincerity of his feelings. So why not take advantage of the opportunity?

True signs that you are interested in him only as a sexual addiction are the following:

he regularly disappears important matters after a date;

he is not interested in the details of your life;

he exhibits a cold demeanor that only becomes hot at the moment of intimacy;

he will not agree to a date, as a result he will not get sex;

he wants to be alone with you, shifting conversations and walks in the park "for later."

The main feature sexual use is that he does not show his feelings in front of strangers. A man is unlikely to hug you, hold your hand or kiss you in crowded place. He prefers secluded and secluded places. Such a novel has a predetermined end date in the guy's head. Having enjoyed you, he will go in search of a new "victim".

monetary gain

Unfortunately, this species consumer relations is increasingly common. Banal gigolos, although they do not consider themselves as such. Many men strive for a carefree life in the company of a beautiful (or not so beautiful) companion. This option is especially likely if you make good money or are sponsored by your parents.

Warning signs:

your boyfriend constantly gets sick relatives, there are problems at work and other force majeure, due to which he has no money;

he is not embarrassed when you pay for dinner at a restaurant or shopping home;

he regularly promises to make up for your expenses, which he later safely forgets about;

he does not give you gifts and generally tries to minimize waste;

he is trying to borrow a large sum from you.

And pay attention, this kind of relationship is accompanied by some coldness on the part of the man. He is not burdened with care, is not interested in your life, is unlikely to introduce you to friends. But the financial aspect is of great interest to him. Of course, in order to understand this, one must be able to understand the relationship between a man and a woman. This is discussed in detail in the 3 keys to harmonious relations».

Attention and care

To understand that a man is not sincere, but wants to use you, is as easy as shelling pears! Pay attention to his attitude towards you. Is there awe and attention in these relationships? For example, he knows that you prefer Japanese cuisine, but your joint usual route lies to a budget pizzeria near the house.

You're all ears buzzing about the upcoming premiere romantic comedy, however, he buys tickets for an action film instead. You dream of hiking in Italy, and he orders trips to a Karelian village, not wanting to beat his legs in vain. All this suggests that he values only his own comfort and is not going to reckon with your interests.

A significant sign of a frivolous attitude towards a girl is complete absence care. He will not meet you at the airport, he will refuse to go to his parents' dacha to help in the garden, he will be busy at the moment when you need help. A man does not want to burden himself and waste time on solving your issues. He enjoys an easy and unobtrusive relationship format, demonstrating a lack of seriousness.

The devil hid well in the details

Pay attention to the details of your meetings, and then true attitude men will become obvious:

he does not remember the date of his birthday, the anniversary of his acquaintance, or the presence of an allergy to violets;

he abruptly disappears from your life, also rapidly returning there. For example, a guy disappeared for a week, after which he stands on the threshold, as if nothing had happened;

his words rarely coincide with the deed - he says that he is very bored, while calling very rarely. He assures that he wants to see you, but does not make an appointment. He admits to being in love, but spends most of his time with friends;

frequent shifts moods in your presence - this behavior signals that the man has already achieved his goal and now he is no longer interested in communicating with you. Therefore, any joke or desire for a serious conversation brings out his state of equilibrium;

ignoring candy period- bouquet, sweets, small gifts talk not only about good manners, but also about serious intention men. Someone who just wants to use you won't have to worry about all those nice romantic little things;

acquaintance with the company - if a man stubbornly hides you from friends, then you should think about it. In most cases, this indicates that he does not plan to continue your communication for a long time;

spontaneous meetings - he does not call you to the cinema in advance, invites you to a restaurant for late tea, etc. It is quite possible that a man holds a woman as a "fallback";

absence joint plans- he does not say that he will buy tickets for the performance of interest, which will take place in a couple of weeks. you don't plan joint vacation. The lack of plans together hints at the temporary nature of your romance;

Not gentlemanly behavior- he can afford to speak rudely in your presence and with you, yawns without covering his face with his hand, eats carelessly. He does not try to impress or seem better than he really is. In other words, he doesn't care.

household trifles

It turns out that you can be used not only at the beginning of a relationship, but also at the stage when everything, it would seem, has become very serious. You begin to live together, but thoughts of personal exploitation do not leave your pretty head. Perhaps he is just comfortable that his apartment is in order, there is always fresh food, and in the evening legal sex awaits him.

A sign of this kind of use is the complete lack of help around the house. He will never throw out the garbage, will not help carry heavy packages from the store, will not wash the dishes after receiving guests.

How to understand that a man is using you? Yes, just pay attention to the tone of communication between you. If you meet him affectionately and gently, saying cute nonsense, and in response you hear only “what do we have for dinner?”, then there is no question of sincerity of feelings. He is interested in the comfort around him. You are the way comfortable life, but not more.

It's very easy to cheat in a relationship. But if you stop entertaining yourself with meaningless hope and really look at the relationship, you can either be happy for your man or send off the deceiver.

www.dowlatow.ru

How to understand that a man is using you

Why do we pay for love? It is this actual question experts and participants latest issue discussed in the project studio. Reality heroes, Zhenya and Sasha, as well as post-show guests, the Miloserdova spouses, have become an example of what consumer attitude one of the spouses to the other. How to find out what underlies your partner's behavior - mercantile goals or real ones warm feelings- says Irina Kirichenko, the lead psychologist of the project "Vryatyte our family".

Unfortunately, not all men that we meet on the path of life behave with dignity. The fact that you live in the same territory, wake up in the same bed in the morning, does not mean that your expectations from the relationship are the same, and you are pursuing the same goals. It is painful and insulting for all of us, regardless of gender, to realize that instead of fiery feelings, there was only cold calculation, profit and skillful manipulation.

When a man uses a girl, this is an unhealthy relationship. If you feel that your beloved guy only shows increased attention to you at certain moments, this may be evidence that he is not selfish towards you. We bring to your attention an article from which you will find out if your man is using you.

shutr.bz

1. You pay for two all the time

2. You temporarily support him with finances.

Based on the previous point, if you have such a relationship, it is logical that you give him pocket money as well. Ah, he has temporary difficulties, he was fired, he is writing a dissertation, he is in search of himself and he is not up to work? Of course, it is more convenient to take the money that is carefully offered to him. Remember - you should never, under any circumstances, give a man your money! Firstly, it simply kills his masculine essence, and secondly, the world is full of men who will gladly take care of you, not to mention themselves.

shutr.bz

3. He communicates with you when he needs something.

4. He gets passionate and tender at certain times.

5. You are always to blame

shutr.bz

6. He never buys you anything.

Do you often buy gifts for him, but he does nothing for you? Or once a year, on March 8, he brings a rose and makes a long speech on the topic that large bouquets are vulgarity and window dressing, but one flower will tell about his feelings more than 25 roses? He definitely needs something from you, but he is not going to give all the best in response.

7. He doesn't care for you

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8. He doesn't pay attention to your feelings.

It's a pity, but in modern world not all men behave like knights, respecting and protecting the lady of their hearts. you spend together fun evenings and even wake up in the same bed? This does not mean that the relationship is serious, and the chosen one is really in love with you. Perhaps a man is indifferent to you or simply uses you to satisfy any personal needs. How to understand that a man does not love you? How to avoid manipulation by a partner? Read the article!

Constant lack of time to communicate with your woman

Does he value work too much, disappear for a week? Know that he has no feelings for you. If a man loves a woman, he will always find a couple of minutes to call, or at least short message. And if his calls are rare, then you can not flatter yourself about yours. further relations. What to do if a man does not love, but uses (in this case- your patience and meekness)? Decide for yourself once and for all whether you need such a relationship, and act!

He only needs one

Cases when men need sex from women, and nothing else, are not uncommon in the modern world. It is a pity that many representatives do not understand this. If a man does not love, but uses you, it can be seen immediately. When he is gentle, loving and sensitive only up to intimacy, and after it turns to the wall and does not want to talk about anything - this is not love. It's simple sexual attraction and passion. loving person says pleasant things to his lady often, and the sexual manipulator - only at the moment of excitement, after satisfaction the object is no longer interesting to him.

How to understand that you are being used? Manipulative men usually do not think about the pleasure of the second half in bed. They only think about themselves, their discharge. These men want to be on top, but they use standard set memorized techniques, without thinking whether they will please a particular woman.

Signs that a man does not love you: inattention to business

A man in love with a woman always strives to learn more about her, he is interested in what she lives with. He wants to know how the lady spent the day, how she is doing at work or school, what kind of music she likes, what movie she wants to watch. Such questions simply will not come to mind for a man-manipulator, he is not interested in either the past or the present, nor, unfortunately, future life partners. If a man does not love, but uses you, he will not be sensitive to your mood swings and be interested in affairs and plans.

He doesn't use the word "we"

Does your partner not use the pronoun "we" when talking about your couple? You can immediately draw disappointing conclusions: he has no serious plans for a relationship. Such a person does not recognize you as a single entity. If the two of you went to the cinema together, he may say to a friend: “I went to the cinema yesterday.” He does not like talking about a joint future, even if not far off. Such a partner will not take pictures together with you and, most likely, will ask you not to upload joint pictures in social media. Such signs only speak of a lack of love and affection from a partner.

He won't let you into his life

A man loves or uses a woman, it is easy to understand. All the signs mentioned above speak of dislike. However, there are other important "symptoms" that your partner is not interested in you. A man who does not let a woman into his life is simply using her. A person who avoids talking about himself does not like to invite a lady to visit him, does not introduce her to his parents and friends, and is unlikely to take her seriously. The main signs that a man does not love you are indicated in this article. Remember them forever, if you do not want to be a toy in someone's hands! There is also such a variety of men who take a girl in their company, but stay very distant. They do not kiss or hug their partner in front of friends and generally spend more time away from her.

Always pay attention to male look. If a partner is interested in you, his eyes will give it away. A man in love looks straight in the face, not going down on a blouse, neckline or knees. Eyes fixed on the neckline will only tell about sexual interest. Eyes running around the room indicate a lack of interest in the interlocutor. If a man doesn't love you but takes advantage of you, he may even show signs of impatience (like tapping his fingers or rocking in a chair).

Psychology of the victim

Why do some women seem to attract manipulative men to them? The fact is that a person is responsible for everything that happens to him (although he may not even be aware of it). The state of the victim is psychological internal state, it literally attracts all sorts of lovers of easy money of a material, sexual and other nature. If someone is using you, it means that you yourself allow similar situations. What could be the reasons for such an internal state?

Disrespect for self.
various complexes.
The desire to hurt yourself, to punish with the help of strangers.

It is very likely that this explanation did not please you, but it answers the question of why you were chosen to be the "victim". How can a woman be used?

Love manipulation. Very often, an insecure lady agrees to "supporting roles", that is, she simply becomes a mistress married man. While it seems like you're not worthy the best option, a man will use you to satisfy physiological needs
Professional use. For a woman who does not believe in her strength and talent, in a working environment, colleagues will try to throw off a large part of their work. Also, cunning colleagues can appropriate your ideas, curry favor with superiors, while at the same time convincing you of absolute professional unsuitability.
"Friendly communication. Very often, an insecure woman acquires a manipulative friend who knows which buttons to press and will quickly win over the “victim”. A woman, listening to false compliments, and pleased with admiration in her direction, is ready to do for " best friend" anything. Than the latter and enjoys with great pleasure.

Adverse signs

If you feel like you're being taken advantage of, but you can't be 100% sure, listen for these alarm bells.

Assumptions of relatives and close people that they do not love you at all, but simply use them. At first, such conversations in the “victim” cause only rejection and anger.
Relationship analysis shows that you give much more than you receive.

Think for a few days in a calm atmosphere over the question posed, and then, on the contrary, try to distract yourself and forget about it. The right conclusion will come by itself.

How not to be used?

Often a woman is not able to quickly deal with such a question: “Does a man love or use?”. How to understand what a partner really feels, we described in detail in the article above. How can such situations be prevented? Know your worth! And we are talking not only about love, but also about professional, material plans. Have clearly set hard work on self-confidence, and then no manipulator will simply be able to break into your life and ruin it.

Don't settle for a relationship you don't want just because this moment Such stories lead to manipulation and sad outcomes.

Do you understand that a man does not love you, but simply uses you? Rather part with him, because the pain of separation will last much less than the bitterness of humiliation, unfulfilled hopes and annoyance!

Unfortunately, the days of knights protecting the lady of their hearts are long gone. And now every woman, starting a new relationship, needs to take a closer look at her chosen one, because in the modern world it is not uncommon to meet a man who just likes to use girls to achieve any goals. Psychologists identify a number of signs that will help determine whether to continue such a relationship.

You don't know the basics about him.

One, two, three dates have passed, but he really didn’t tell anything about himself, constantly avoids personal questions and turns the arrows on you or affects common topics. And then, after another date or a stormy night, the man suddenly stops answering calls and disappears from the horizon, and after a week or two he reappears as if he had not disappeared at all. He manages to make you guilty that you reproach him and will find a hundred reasons for his act. If he does this regularly, you should seriously think about the fact that a man just uses you when it suits him.

He doesn't look at you for no reason.

Without exception, all men first pay attention to appearance, that is, they love with their eyes. If you notice that he looks with delight and often looks for you with his eyes, no doubt he has a romantic interest in you. And when catching his eye is a rarity for you, you should not cherish dreams of great love.

He lives for you

An undoubted sign of the use of a woman is that he is not at all embarrassed that she often or constantly pays for two. He cries that he was fired, in connection with which temporary financial difficulties arose, which for a long time do not end. You live in your house, and he is in search of himself and he has absolutely no time to look for a job to pay his bills. You should not tolerate such an attitude, even if you are head over heels in love. If you have difficulties, he will quickly stop showing interest.

You don't feel his care

A man who is not indifferent to you will show attention and care, even if it concerns ordinary trifles. He will not insist on continuing the walk if you are tired of walking in heels, he will offer help with housework or, without hints, he will take on some of the duties. When he finds out that you are sick, he will not disappear from sight without even asking how you feel. If you are coldly dressed, and he is basking in his jacket on a cold evening, most likely he does not care about you at all.

You do not feel spiritual closeness

You come home from work tired and upset, and he looks at you and asks when dinner will be ready. I quarreled with a friend on the phone, but he still watches TV, not paying attention to your tears. She got a promotion at work and decided to arrange a surprise, and he didn’t even ask what the holiday was about. If the chosen one asks not to burden him with his problems and worries, then it’s just convenient for him that a woman does housework and is always at hand. Caring man will be able to take his mind off things and find time to listen to you and help if necessary.

Just a word without deed

He terribly yearned for you, but he calls once a week, burns with a desire to see you, but something constantly interferes with arranging a meeting, declares his love, but friends often become more important than you, promises to fix something, bring, do, but in last moment he has answers. All this warning signs the fact that the guy hangs “noodles” on his ears to lull your vigilance. It is normal for men to embellish their abilities, but a gross lie in simple little things indicates the intention to use and quit.

If there is nothing behind his words, such a man does not consider your relationship as something worthwhile.

His mood worsens with you

Problems at work or with health result in irritability and criticism of your person, it is no secret that such periods are present in most long term relationship. But such behavior may also indicate that you are simply being used, so you should be very careful here. If the state of “not in the spirit” manifests itself regularly, it is worth thinking about ending such a relationship.

His territory is taboo for you

You have a good time at your place, but he is in no hurry to invite him to his place? You have not seen his friends live, although you have been dating for quite some time? Your man has many interests, hobbies, but he does not share all this with you. This clear signs the fact that a man is in no hurry to acquaint you with his surroundings, which means he does not consider it necessary, because he does not intend to move on to a serious relationship.

Inattention on first dates

If a man is interested in you, then receiving this or that information about you, he does not let it go past his ears and will surely be able to remember that you love tulips, not thorny roses. If he forgets about the simplest signs of attention, but at the same time clearly hints at intimacy, then he is only interested in you as a girl for sex.

long courtship

When a man is set to serious relationship and the willingness to create a family nest, he will not delay the moment when you become the mistress of “your” home. If you are referring to Cohabitation, and he constantly changes the subject or says that it is not yet time, without explaining the reasons, most likely, he does not plan a joint future, but only takes advantage of the moment.

There is no "we" in the conversation

You can go to disappointing conclusions if, speaking of your couple, he does not use the pronoun “we”. You can visit the cinema together, and he will say to a friend: “Yesterday I watched interesting film". Such a man avoids talking about a joint even in the near future, photos where the two of you ask not to post on a page on a social network or does not want to be photographed with you at all, hiding behind his non-photogenicity. There is no doubt that a man has no interest in starting a serious and long-term relationship with you.

If your couple has existed for a long time or you are already married and “we” disappears from the lexicon, this is alarm signal about problems that could lead to separation.

He raises his self-esteem

It's not uncommon to meet a man who uses a woman to make himself feel uplifted. Often, girls who for one reason or another are not confident in themselves and their attractiveness come across this hook. Their vigilance is lulled by the fact that he turned his attention to her, and not to others, and she, considering him a benefactor, is ready to recognize the primacy of her partner. Usually such men are biased towards everything that a woman does for them and often criticize her. It is always not enough for them: attention, adoration, deification, from themselves they do not give anything.

Only intimacy

He calls and offers to meet, he is attentive, loving and gentle, but as soon as there was a moment of intimacy without extra words turns to the wall, and in the morning he was gone. And now, a week later romantic feelings wake up again, burn with passion and fall asleep again immediately after satisfaction sexual desire. This behavior indicates one thing - he does not love, and a woman is interesting only as an object to satisfy male needs.

Use for jealousy

If, during a meeting or on a date, your chosen one behaves rather passively, and then, as if an electric shock, and he becomes cute and abruptly begins to show attention, you should look around. It may be nearby ex girlfriend, after the departure of which his charm fades again. From such behavior, only one conclusion can be drawn, he uses you in order to arouse a feeling of jealousy in a girl whose feelings have not yet cooled.

For career or prospects

You should be careful with romantic relationships at work, because it is often possible to start a relationship with a person who intends to use you to achieve certain goals. After a few meetings, he may ask to put in a good word for him in front of his superiors. If he is obsessively interested in your work at some point, he may pass off your idea as his own.

By manipulating feelings, a man is able to convince a female boss to give him a promotion, although there are candidates who are more deserving of this place or offer a vacancy to an unemployed chosen one. After he achieves what he wants, most likely, parting will follow.

How not to become "Used"

If a woman has become a victim of a manipulator, first of all, you need to understand why they chose her. Sometimes a woman herself, without realizing it, attracts men who strive to use her. Often this happens due to such conditions:

the woman is full of complexes;
does not respect himself as a person;
has low self-esteem.

So if you don't want to be a victim, don't let men take advantage of you.

A woman, first of all, must love herself with all the flaws and shortcomings, she needs to know her worth, not only in relations with a man, but also at work. You should decide on life goals and work on your confidence. Even if you are single now, you should not agree to a relationship that does not suit you, because nothing good will come of it.

If you feel some of the above signs that you are being used, check your chosen one, make him jealous, give an ultimatum. The person who really needs you will make concessions, otherwise there is no point in continuing the relationship with the manipulator. The bitterness of separation will subside faster than the pain of humiliation and annoyance.

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