If after talking with a person you feel bad. How to protect yourself from an energy vampire? Where do “donors” come from?
I didn't believe in evil eyes before, considering them folk fiction, stupid superstitions. But recently I began to understand that there is something in this... Our people are wise, they have been accumulating knowledge about human psychology and relationships for centuries. Certainly, remove evil eyes on grandmothers I won’t go, but it won’t hurt to adhere to certain rules in communicating with people and cultivate inner strength.
In life we are surrounded by different people - with some it is pleasant to communicate and spend time, with others I want to meet you least of all. Some inspire us and add positive emotions, while others, on the contrary, seem to suck out all the juice. After communicating with such people, you feel physically exhausted, empty, everything falls out of your hands, and your head hurts. Previously they were called people with the evil eye, now - energy vampires. Moreover, among them there are, relatively speaking, active and passive “individuals”. And if the latter suck the strength out of you without wanting it (they can also be among friends), then the active ones attack deliberately, recharging with someone else’s energy.
The worst thing is when, due to circumstances, a person is forced to communicate with the “vampire” constantly. The best victim for them - an emotionally impressionable person who is easy to “bite” and hurt. Then they either continue to finish off the “bitten” person, or let him go for a while and take on another victim. At times it is unbearable to even be around such a person. To protect yourself from "vampires", you must first of all cultivate endurance and indestructibility.
How to protect yourself from an energy vampire
Never show a “vampire” that you have succumbed to his “bites.” In no case you can't show your weakness, become depressed. Otherwise, he will simply “eat” you. When communicating with a “vampire” you should try to stay away from him, mentally put an invisible wall between you and them. And also try... to smile at this person (but not remove the “wall”). Such a benevolent reaction will irritate the energy vampire, “disarming” him.
The main thing is not to become like a “vampire” do not answer him in the same coin. Relations with him need to be narrowed to the narrowest framework. In addition, such people like to provoke frank conversations, get into someone else's soul and pretend that they care about you. They will smile in your face and hold a stone in their bosom. It is advisable not to share personal joy or achievements with them. At such moments, you open up, and the “vampires” suck all the positivity out of you. They themselves will never tell good news about themselves. Most of them, by nature, are people with a difficult character who are always dissatisfied with everything.
"Vampire" will complain, that “I didn’t have any rest this year: there was no weather, the food in the sanatorium was terrible,” “I didn’t buy anything for travel at the market - I just spent money,” “there are only problems at home.” This is a smart tactic. By painting everything in black, he makes you feel “depressed.” He also makes a protective barrier so that he is not accidentally jinxed or envied. He simply judges others by himself. Although he himself often has, as people say, an evil eye. He just looks at an open person, and in a few minutes he will stumble, or suddenly have a stomach ache or headache. In more severe cases, a long black streak occurs in life... After that, you just want to tie a red thread on your wrist. Just in case.
How to protect yourself from an energy vampire?
Why, after communicating with some people, do you feel a sense of unreasonable irritability, a sharp deterioration in your mood, and a feeling that you have been “squeezed like a lemon”? Where does this mysterious feeling of tiredness come from? Most likely, your friend is an energy vampire. But how to distinguish an energy vampire from an ordinary person? How to calmly communicate with him and not feel a breakdown later?
There are several signs by which you can identify an energy vampire.
1. The main distinguishing feature of a vampire is that they always irritate and piss off other people. Any little thing can be a reason for a quarrel. They can also humiliate their interlocutor in the presence of others, laugh at him and make evil jokes to cause irritation. They may borrow money and not pay it back. However, they will constantly promise “as soon as possible.”
2. Energy vampires are suspicious people, bores and selfish people. Often they simply do not hear the interlocutor, because the vampire does not care about his opinion, his thoughts and feelings.
3. The energy vampire is very jealous and vindictive. The vampire protects his personal donor from the outside world, surrounds him with increased attentiveness and care, and is jealous of other people.
4. Energy vampires can talk on the phone for hours. They immediately burden their interlocutor with their problems and failures. The conversation resembles ordinary chatter about nothing, but after it for some reason you begin to feel tired and depressed. It is very difficult to get rid of an energy vampire; resentment immediately begins. Sometimes you just have to turn off your phone.
5. There is an opinion that in the presence of energy vampires, equipment constantly breaks down and flowers wither. Most often they don’t have flowers at home either, they simply don’t like them, or the flowers don’t grow on their own.
6. Vampires love crowds of people: queues, demonstrations, large stores. Vampires like to appear where there is a high probability of scandal. Scandal is an additional source of energy for them.
It is worth saying that there are also mixed types: the same person can manifest himself in different situations both as an energy vampire and as a donor. Among energy vampires there are often charming and kind people who simply do not notice their negative impact on other people.
It often happens when one relative lives off the energy of another. This can be expressed in scandals and showdowns. However, a family can be generally considered ideal, but someone in it is constantly sick and is generally considered a failure. This person gives his energy to the vampire. By the way, when there are two vampires in a family, they either constantly quarrel and separate, or they live “harmoniously” and draw energy from outside connections.
It happens that a vampire is waiting for you at work. What if this is also the boss? Such a vampire does not like it when there is a good mood around him, he will do everything to ruin this mood. And it is useless to convince him.
There is another curious type of vampires - sex vampires. At the moment of orgasm, a person is filled with positive energy. And vampires take this energy and give nothing in return. After sexual contact with an energy vampire, his partner feels disharmony and dissatisfaction.
So, if among these characteristics you recognize your acquaintance, friend, relative or even loved one, the question arises: what to do?
Firstly, it is better not to communicate with an energy vampire at all. And especially if the person is unpleasant and uninteresting to you. Do not attract the attention of energy vampires, do not enter into friendly relations with them and do not do good deeds for them by bending yourself. They still won't appreciate it. They will simply take away the energy as soon as they feel weak.
Secondly, don't get annoyed! The vampire's goal is your irritation, this is your weak spot. Instead of getting annoyed and angry, simply either walk away from the conflict, or, on the contrary, make your reaction unexpected for the vampire. For example, make a joke or smile instead of crying.
Thirdly, protect your energy and biofield. To do this, cross your legs or arms while talking to a vampire. You can keep a fig in your pocket. You can imagine that between you and the vampire there is a thick mirror, the reflection of which is turned towards the vampire.
If it is not possible not to communicate with an energy vampire, then try to perceive your interlocutor with humor. And laugh off the vampire’s rude statements. Rest assured, he will not tolerate this and will not be able to harm you.
And irritation and fatigue from an energy vampire can be relieved with the help of your favorite music, films, poems, books, and aromatic oils. After contact with a vampire or after being in crowded places, you need to take a contrast shower and drink your favorite hot tea. Take a walk among the trees; they absorb negative energy and transform it into positive energy.
If, while communicating with a person, you feel some discomfort and a feeling of depression, it means that your interlocutor is consciously, or without realizing it, putting pressure on your psyche. For a person who does not understand the psychology of behavior, this is simply unpleasant communication that causes certain feelings, irritation, rejection, contempt and some others, in a word, a feeling of discomfort and anxiety. It's all about unconscious communication, the kind of communication that we often communicate with each other. When a person utters certain words, he can put his feelings into them, such as contempt, ridicule, anger, envy and so on, in general, everything that can evoke in his interlocutor certain emotions that are adequate to what was put into the words that he heard. To put it simply, all spoken words have their own meaning. The words themselves show only the meaning that is open to our understanding, that is, it is simply a decoding of the meaning of the word.
But the hidden meaning is not so easy to notice; it lies in such details as tone, emotionality, rhythm and, most importantly, the time and place when a person talks about something. And, of course, the feelings and thoughts that a person puts into his words are very important. You yourself have probably heard the same word more than once, but pronounced in different ways, and in different cases it could evoke different emotions in you. People who are skilled in such communication techniques very often manipulate other people, causing them to have a certain image of themselves. Through dialogue with them. As an example, you can take a beggar, a disabled person or a woman with a child, who will play on your feelings of guilt and, as a result, pity for them, simply causing such an emotion in you, influencing you.
At the same time, there may not be communication itself, but the urge to your feelings is there and that’s enough. However, this is still an open form of influence, and it is obvious to many, but what is more difficult to notice is, for example, communication between two people, in which one of the interlocutors first admires the other, winning him over as much as possible with the help of subtle flattery and great attention , and then casually turns the conversation to his problems, and how hard it is for him to live a life in which there is absolutely no one to count on. Such a hint that you need to meet certain requirements and be above the rest is often perceived automatically. Therefore, it does not matter at all what the interlocutor says, what is more important is why he says it. Here you need to think about what a person might need from you if he communicates with you in such a way as to give you great pleasure.
As you can see, the examples given indicate to us a possible impact on our psyche, through urges to our unconscious thinking. After all, when you enjoy communicating with a person, thanks to his respectful attitude towards you, you may not think about the goals of his communication, and simply enjoy the process. You can be in a company of people where someone talks about his life, just like that, without any specific calls, as if casually mentioning certain details, he talks about himself without any openly expressed emotions, he does not extol himself, does not laugh above himself and does not ridicule others, but at the same time, he is in favor of those around him. The point is to say what people want to hear, what's on people's minds, and what's important, in a language they understand. Then they will listen with pleasure and respond to the person’s words in the right way.
People themselves, without realizing it, develop sympathy for such a person; no one knows why, but they begin to like him, because nothing happens for nothing, and words are not spoken just like that. If we return to uncomfortable communication, which is what we are actually talking about, then everything here works according to the same principle. Your unconscious part of the brain receives negative information, this is either aggression against you, or an incentive to do something, or simply the interlocutor indicates to you that he is superior to you. Moreover, as I already said, the interlocutor may not necessarily understand what he is doing and how he is doing it, just his feelings towards the one with whom he is communicating can prompt him to communicate in a certain way.
Let’s say, it’s hard to communicate with a person as a simple interlocutor if you hate him fiercely, or, on the contrary, love him very much, because your words will be filled with the feelings that you experience, they will carry exactly the information that is actually intended for your interlocutor. That’s why this is called unconscious communication, because words themselves are empty, there is nothing behind them except what can be seen with desire and understanding. As I already said, this is material for a whole book, because in order to convey the whole meaning of such unconscious communication and, most importantly, to teach people to see what is actually hidden behind people’s words, it is necessary to give massive examples with the help of which one can penetrate into the very essence of all this . So what to do if you feel discomfort when communicating with a person? There are several ways to resolve this situation so that both you and your interlocutor do not play games with the subconscious.
The easiest way is to refuse to communicate with a person with whom you are not comfortable, because you don’t know what’s going on, but if you don’t like it, then why do you need such communication. If this person is significant to you, maybe it’s your relative or you just see him quite often and are forced to contact him, then pay attention to his manner of communication. Take a closer look at the person, whether the slightest particle of expectation slips into his manner of communication; this can be understood by a questioning glance, or by a sharp interruption of speech, as, in fact, by the desire to communicate with you in general.
If your interlocutor expects something from you, if he often approaches you and tries to communicate, he clearly needs something, and the best way to find out is to ask a direct and clear question about what he needs from you. Try to ask the question precisely at the moment when the interlocutor is desperately expecting something from you, when you feel the maximum discomfort from his words. This usually works, because we are all human, and we have emotions that force us to bring our inner feelings to light.
I have not given all the possible examples that can occur during uncomfortable communication, and not all the ways to solve such a problem with discomfort, but by at least understanding the nature of such discomfort, you can already control its possible occurrence. As for your response to the unconscious part of your interlocutor, or an unconscious message to his consciousness, something like a counterattack against him, then I will write a separate book about this. This will be a book about the unconscious behavior of people, from which you will learn a lot more.
They exist if they talk about it!
Of course not vampires, but just people who are great at hold your attention and call you unpleasant feelings during communication or fatigue after what gives them pleasure, but you don’t.
I’ll just make a reservation right away! There is no uncontrollability and sacrifice in this process. No one will do anything to you until you give in and give up the right to someone else to do this to you. If you suffer from “psychic vampires,” then you need to learn to defend yourself and take care of yourself.
Knowledge about the process gives you an understanding of what to do and how to protect yourself.
1. Take the initiative. Whoever holds attention controls the flow of energy in communication.
2. Ruthlessly, without guilt, interrupt unpleasant conversations. The more inconspicuous, the better. (Urgently to work, children, important calls, milk has run out.)
3. You can change the topic. Take the conversation in a different direction.
3. Drop the pen on the floor. Make an unexpected gesture, appropriate, but a little brighter than expected. This interrupts the sustained attention.
If you know this, but it doesn’t work out, contact a psychologist individually or in a confident communication group.
Do energy vampires exist?
If we are internally ready that we were controlled and we have highly developed magical thinking, then vampires, the end of the world, and the fear of meteorites fall on the fertile soil of our perception.
...after a conversation with a certain person feel tired and exhausted?
This state is possible if your perception is set to suppression. Different people perceive the same person differently. The more charismatic and aggressive a person is, the more people that person can suppress. But not everyone.
What if this happens every time you meet?
You can run away, changing your life paths, or turn to a psychologist to cultivate a strong personality.
There are people with negative thoughts, negative feelings, and accordingly there is negative, negative energy around them. They don't necessarily enjoy it. When meeting “positive” people, they seem to draw positive energy out of the person.
But this happens because it is human nature to empathize, to experience the same feelings that the so-called energy vampire experiences. If these are negative feelings, then your “+” goes into “-” Or, on the contrary, a person does not share the opinions and ideas of the “energy vampire”, does not empathize with him, but communication with him burdens him, after such communication he may even get a headache.
In the first case, do not feel sorry for people. If they come to you to pour out the cup of their problems on you, instead of pity, help: with care, attention, kind words, etc. By feeling sorry all the time, you will teach a person to blame their problems on you, maybe this makes it easier for him, but it’s harder for you.
In the second case, if you are communicating with a person whose opinion or worldview you do not share, and they want to convince you, or this depresses you, do not take it as pressure, do not try to convince you if you fail. Take this simply as someone else’s opinion, you have the right to remain your own.
The litmus test that defines any person is his basic emotional tone. The basic emotion and the resulting behavior of a person is an indicative moment for determining who you are dealing with. Not just the words a person says, but his actions, which are dictated by emotion!
Tips for identifying high- and low-tone people:
Pay attention to the emotional color of the first request that you received from a person. If he somehow made you feel uncomfortable, if they tried to tease you somehow or put you in some kind of confusion, then know for sure that you are dealing with a low-toned person. Be alert!;
If you are asked completely unreasonable and too lengthy questions, the answer to which can only be given by a whole stack of textbooks, then you have a low-toned person in front of you. Why is that? Yes, because a person in high tones always thinks clearly, quickly and accurately. His questions will be specific and easy to answer;
If it is not immediately clear what tone you are dealing with, then ask the person an unexpected, but fairly simple question. If he simply and easily answers it for you. then this is a high-toned person. If he starts looking for some tricks in this or even answers your question with his own question, or pretends that he did not notice your question - know this is the reaction of a low-toned person;
Notice what the person places more emphasis on: the past, the future or the present. If a person likes to suck on something that can no longer be changed, if he is more focused on the past, then this is also a clear sign of a low emotional tone.
Pay attention to whether the person is optimistic in his statements or whether he is more negative and pessimistic. Of course, a high-tone person will be an optimist and this will be read in everything, while a low-tone person will definitely look for shortcomings, assure you that everything is bad, and also lead communication to a dead end;
The most important indicator of tone is a person’s responsibility for his actions, as well as the ability to be reasonable even in difficult situations. But this should not be feigning rationality, causticity or an attempt to make puns on every occasion and for no reason. Real intelligence is felt immediately - you feel at ease and have fun with the person;
- What is worth paying attention to is how often a person likes to use generalizations. That is, how often a person compares himself with the majority and their actions. If this happens, it means the person is low-toned. For example, such a person can constantly say: “But everyone thinks so-and-so,” “Today it is fashionable to do so-and-so,” “People usually do so-and-so,” etc.
- The illusion of a good Samoretian who shows everyone his white smile. Being kind to everyone is the most dangerous and insidious delusion. In fact, this is a direct path to emotional breakdowns.
Rules of communication that will make your life happy and effective:
RULE #1: If you have accurately identified a person’s low tone, then NEVER tell him about it! This is a useless action because a person in a low tone is not able to perceive reality adequately and intelligently. As soon as he perceives it, it means that he has risen in his emotional tone. Draw conclusions about the person yourself and take action;
RULE No. 2: When you realize who you are dealing with, and it turns out to be a low-toned person, then my advice to you is to immediately lose him. Just interrupt communication with him, or make communication with him minimal.
RULE #3: Do not give in to provocations and do not enter into discussions with low-toned people! We can say for sure that all communication with low-tone people consists in the fact that they provoke you and then throw you down, at least to themselves in tone, and at most a couple of emotional tones lower.
Often an energy vampire likes to talk a lot and doesn’t even allow him to get a word in. He is not interested in the person he is talking to, is not interested in his problems or opinion, only his energy is important to him, which he, often unconsciously, receives in such communication. It is important to immediately track how a person communicates with you and, most importantly, why. Often this is just chatter, a venting of negative emotions, which is why such people are so negative and love to complain about their life, about the government, about the weather, about everything. This is the only way they can get rid of their negativity, making the interlocutor worry, regret, or even worse, feel guilty. Try to tell him about your problems and ask for his sympathy (money, time, care) - he will immediately lose interest in you. Unknowingly, such people sometimes provoke a scandal, because unlike other people, a scandal “charges” them and they come out of it full of strength, which cannot be said about their opponent. Therefore, before you start a dialogue with someone, or if you know in advance that this person is a vampire and you need to communicate with him on duty, immediately determine the purpose of your conversation and do not deviate from it, so as not to get stuck in the “teeth” of the energy vampire
Have you ever felt tired and exhausted after a conversation with a certain person? What if this happens every time you meet? Does energy vampirism really exist? or... Yes, it exists, but “energy vampire” is a mathematical name. No one literally sucks anything from anyone. In addition to consciousness, every person has a huge part of the psyche, which is called the unconscious. And when at least two people communicate, communications are built not only at the level of consciousness, but also at the level of the unconscious. Some of the contents of the unconscious are our psychological traumas, which we seem to have forgotten, our repressed negative (for example, resentment, shame, anger, etc.) or positive feelings (for example, unrequited love) .
And when we meet a person with similar unconscious content or the opposite pole, then our “communication” begins regardless of our desire. And the person whose psychological defenses are stronger, as it were, “breaks through” the one who is “weaker.” No one can “vampire” a person with adequate self-esteem, a strong nervous system and psyche.. Therefore, if you feel like you are being “vampired,” you are welcome to seek psychotherapy, this is an indication that your psychological defenses are weak.
I think that the theme of "Vampire" is rather a theme of protecting personal boundaries. I agree with my colleagues, if you are penetrated, manipulated, your desires and actions are used for their own purposes, learn to protect your personal boundaries. This can be solved. My clients get the opportunity to understand where this hole is that others are hitting. And the breach of your personal boundaries is in the place where you have psychological trauma, in the topic where you experienced a traumatic situation in the past. It’s not for nothing that they say, thank your enemies, they are the ones who will show you the way to becoming an individual in you. I would clarify, not only to the core of your personality, but also to strong personal boundaries.
Energy vampirism - myth or reality? What lies behind the concept of vampirism and how can it affect human health?
From the point of view of different directions, this concept can be interpreted in different ways.
For example, in esoteric schools this phenomenon is considered as pumping out positive energy from a person’s field and connecting to negative trends. And it can manifest itself in the form of transmission of certain painful conditions, accumulated negativity and manifests itself in the form of holes or energy holes. When communicating with such people, one feels heaviness, as if the person is unconsciously ready to attack or does so during contact.
Access becomes possible and positive vital energy is released. That is why a person who has been attacked may feel a loss of strength and a state of apathy, as if his energy had been “sucked out”, his life had been “drunk out”. And periodic meetings with such people lead to temporary powerlessness, and recovery takes time.
From the point of view of psychotherapy, there is no such concept in this particular case, however, there is a state of personality when it is not possible to cope with it alone and help is not requested.
Then a person, being in such a state, unconsciously looks for a victim, where the aggression is “drained” onto the opponent.
The aggressor finds a way to displace the negative state at the expense of other people and receives relief for his condition. Separation and fixation on whether it is “mine” or not “mine” allows you not to join this kind of manifestation and helps to draw boundaries at the level of awareness.
All this makes it possible to set priorities and ask questions about what exactly a person who commits unconscious actions needs: “What hidden benefit is present and what needs to be brought to the level of awareness in this case?”
The essence of the manifestation of this kind of thing lies in the lack of help or support from the outside. In any case, boundaries and distancing in a meta position allows you not to resonate with the influencing manipulator and maintain your state at a certain level.
Internal awareness of what is happening now allows you to protect yourself from exposure. Aggression directed outward remains unexposed and either the person finds what to do about it, or turns the aggression inward, without causing harm to others.
Be healthy and take care of each other.
Energy exchange between people is a complex and little-studied topic. Therefore, I will not risk writing about energy vampires here, but will simply talk about those sources of incomprehensible fatigue after communication that I know.
Fatigue is possible if you are “infected” with depression the person you were communicating with. Emotional “contagion” is a real phenomenon. It is possible if we are poorly aware of what is happening to us and tend to dissolve in the interlocutor. For example, the interlocutor complains about life, in which this is bad, and this, and in general everything around is a nightmare. You listen, empathize, become emotionally involved in the story, forgetting about the possibility of critical perception. As a result, you may well come out of the conversation tired, as if the troubles listed by your interlocutor had fallen on your own head.
We can get very tired if suppress our feelings. It takes a lot of energy not to feel or show anger, for example. And as a result of a conversation in which we were angry with the interlocutor, but for various reasons could not admit it to ourselves and him, we may feel exhausted. The reasons for the suppression of feelings are most often unconscious internal prohibitions - on certain feelings in general (for example, “You can’t be angry”, “Fear is a sign of weakness, and it’s dangerous to be weak”), on emotional manifestations in specific situations (“Elders must be respected”, “ Good women love children."
A source of fatigue that is particularly interesting to me is passive-aggressive behavior interlocutor. It is interesting because such behavior is sometimes difficult to determine. But we get enormously tired of interaction in this case. For example, during a conversation, the interlocutor hears and reacts to some of your phrases, but does not notice others. Or suddenly he begins to smile absentmindedly, as if immersed within himself. Or, in answering your question, he does it not directly and definitely, but as if answering some other question. There are many options for passive aggression, but they have the same essence - the interlocutor ignores and devalues some of your manifestations in the dialogue. And it seems like there’s nothing to be angry about - everything is fine, you’re talking pleasantly. As a result, there is no room for anger - a natural reaction to devaluation. You find yourself forced to suppress it and get tired of the conversation.
And another source of fatigue - ambivalent behavior another man. Duality, like passive aggression, we also often do not realize. For example, you meet an acquaintance, and with a tense face he says how glad he is to see you - words convey one message, and facial expressions convey another. Your psyche, faced with contradictory flows of information, turns off the processing of one of them. You perceive your acquaintance as happy to meet you, blocking the perception of his incomprehensible facial expression. This takes a lot of energy and leaves you feeling tired.
There is only one way to protect yourself from fatigue in the situations described. If you feel discomfort in communication, take a break and think about what is happening. If fatigue occurs with a loved one, then you can invite him to discuss what is happening. But in any case, you have to choose whether you are willing to pay the price in the form of fatigue for what you get in this interaction.
Does energy vampirism really exist? or..
This will depend primarily on which “world map” we will look at this problem from... If you look at this from the world of esotericism, then they probably exist... But,!!!then, accordingly, it manifests itself the need to fight (or protect) from these “creatures”.
If we begin to analyze this phenomenon from the point of view of psychological science, the picture will immediately change.
From the point of view of the scientific paradigm, energy vampires simply do not exist. And there are people with certain problems in building and implementing communications with other people. Who are these people? In my opinion, first of all, this is:
Manipulators who actively use all kinds of psychological games in communication;
People with obvious and hidden behavioral deviations caused by mental health disorders;
as well as so-called “toxic” people who “poison” the space around themselves with destructive negative attitudes.
The reasons for choosing such ineffective behavioral strategies are manifold and related to:
Violation of trust and, accordingly, the boundaries of personal space (both your own and, accordingly, other people),
Psychological immaturity,
Lack of flexibility, as an important factor in adapting to changing living conditions,
And also with the presence of subconscious destructive destructive tendencies.
There is, of course. Just don’t complicate or mystify anything, I think. Let's figure out what we're dealing with when this happens:
"... after a conversation with a certain person you feel tired and exhausted... this repeats every time you meet..."
A person has 3 types of energy. The first, basic one is physical. It comes to us through food, through passive rest/sleep, through breathing, and water. This is obvious and understandable: if you haven't eaten, haven't slept enough, there's little oxygen in the air, you're not drinking enough fluids - you'll feel tired and exhausted. Therefore, before talking about vampires, try checking this level. Perhaps the “vampire” you are looking for meets you just at the end of the working day. And a slight irritation (which can happen anywhere and to anyone) is enough for the interlocutor in your state to begin to seem almost like Dracula.
The second type of energy is emotions. This is the most basic and even more powerful than the basic type of energy. Sometimes, within certain limits, emotions can even replace the basic source. Remember, being emotionally involved in something, you might forget about food. Or they went without sleep at night when there was some kind of strong emotional intensity. Another thing is that it will not be possible to completely replace one with the other, but a person within the “basic set” of life, as a rule, is not happy. Moreover, if a person has only basic level energy, then he often begins to slide into severe dissatisfaction, depression, and sometimes somatic illnesses. And from these observations we can draw a conclusion that is already obvious to many - a person needs emotions. This is his main energy - this is what drives him (the basis of motivation), this is what gives the colors of life, what gives him his own need, belonging, what a person needs to feel alive.
The third type of energy involves a level of development of the senses that is not accessible to everyone. I will only say that everyone has this type of energy, but if a person has not developed his senses to a state beyond the usual, then most likely this level will not be noticeable to him and will not particularly influence his life. And this has nothing directly to do with psychology. It is enough that emotions influence all of us, and it is precisely they that most often serve as a reason for the mystification of certain behavioral patterns.
Now imagine a portrait of a “vampire”. Most often, he is an ordinary person who feels as usual and does not know any complex energy techniques. And most often he does not want to “vampire” anyone, at least consciously. But the fact is that most of his needs are not realized. Or he has internal limitations that prevent him from getting what he wants in the world, whatever it is - approval, support, warmth, love. Most of those who fall under the label of “vampire”, as a rule, are not particularly gifted with love or support, and most often do not know how to build relationships with people in such a way that it is given voluntarily. It turns out that most often in the role of the so-called. “Vampires” are people who are dissatisfied with life, who themselves are poorly able to receive positive emotions (or who forbid themselves from receiving them due to restrictions instilled in childhood), and most often these are people who find it difficult to build voluntary, open and free relationships with people around them .
And then everything is simple. If no one voluntarily gives positive feedback to a person, he needs at least something. At least some emotions, at least some reaction to yourself. There is no positive one - a negative one will do. Provoking a person to irritation, scandal, regret, or any other not very positive feelings is sometimes a matter of a few words. Moreover, the so-called “vampires” do this quite quickly. Why? - well, since they haven’t learned to build open relationships with people, haven’t learned to ask nicely, exchange emotions openly, then it turns out that they lived and got used to living in an environment where they achieved everything through manipulation, intimidation, mutual insults, provocations and feelings of guilt. It is these practices that such a “vampire” adopts. And if you think about it, due to his upbringing and his own limitations, he simply had no other choice. And since it works, the “vampire” sees no point in abandoning his tactics of extracting emotions. And the principle of the “comfort zone” works here - maybe the word “comfort” is not fully applicable to this, but such a person knows: manipulation, attempts to hurt someone’s feelings, anti-compliments, an attempt to impose one’s own limitations in others - all this works. Yes, it doesn’t bring love, but it brings at least some emotions.
And change is already scary. Because, as you know, the old method works, is more or less predictable and therefore seems safe. And the new one - it may be more effective, but the “vampire” initially lives in an unsafe world, in which they played with him according to very strict rules, according to the rules of intimidation and manipulation, and therefore it is very difficult for him to change, because it is very unsafe according to his concepts .....
All this explanation is most often not realized by the “vampire” himself. He often thinks, “They're luckier than I am,” or uses defenses like, “He's probably worse off than I am,” in order to escape from admitting his dissatisfaction. By arousing negative emotions in others and leading them to exhaustion, he realizes his desire for power, but rather calls all this in terms of “I brought them to light,” although in reality the person only found confirmation of his own pessimistic worldview.
To protect yourself from this you need only 2 things:
1. Realize that a person (that very “vampire”), due to the shortcomings of his upbringing and the impossibility of active personal development, uses very archaic methods of defense and poorly understood, manipulative methods of interaction. And mysticism has nothing to do with it.
2. Decide what to do about it. I would not like to write a separate story about protecting borders and fighting manipulation. But in any case, no matter who your “vampire” is, his actions are quite understandable. And you have the right to choose - to continue interacting with him or not, and if for some of your own reasons you choose to communicate for now, then the choice still remains - to give energy, emotions (i.e. whether to react to manipulation, whether to flare up on provocation, to prove something) or not. And, believe me, there is no force in the universe that could oblige you to give your emotions to someone to whom you no longer want to give them. You can do this only by your own choice. Which it makes sense in such cases to do extremely consciously and with self-love in the first place.
Exists. "Energy vampirism" is a definition given to one of the manifestations of human relationships. Such relationships can be clearly observed on the global network. "Trolling" on the social web is one of the forms of such manifestations.
In fact, each of us is an “energy vampire” (in a figurative sense), since each person needs to feel his own importance in society, just as each of us is an “energy giver” (showing care, expressing support for other people and etc.).
How to avoid becoming a victim? Constant development spiritually, intellectually, physically.
It depends on what we mean by the concept of energy vampire - if we follow the direct interpretation, we mean that a certain person is capable of taking our energy, after which we feel overwhelmed, irritated, tired and devastated. If we accept this, then we agree to the interference of others in our lives and our inability to resist outside influences.
But why does it happen that after communicating with some people we feel a surge of strength and joy, and when we see or communicate with others, we rush to end the conversation as quickly as possible?
There is really no need to deny the existence of a certain quality of energy in humans. But the energies of different people have different strengths and poles of direction - positive or negative. Positive energy is inherent in people who are harmonious, optimistic and who have a balance of will and feelings. Negative energy is inherent in people who are internally disharmonious, dissatisfied with life, pessimistic, prone to destruction and aggression - obvious or hidden. Such people are incapable of knowing themselves, their feelings are mostly blocked and thereby prevent them from receiving pleasure from life, natural joy, and the energy of life. Such people are unable to perceive these positive, healing energies. since they are at a different “frequency” of energy radiation. But since any creature needs to replenish energy, energy “vampires” tend to feed on the negative emotions of other people, for which they provoke an outburst of these same emotions in the potential “victim”. This can be unconscious manipulation, imposing feelings of guilt, provoking tears, a quarrel, a scandal - after achieving what they want, they calm down, as they satiate their energy needs. There are also passive “vampires” who tend to shift part of the burden of their failures, disharmonious attitude towards life onto other people, torment others with constant complaints about life, and so on. However, if a person does not support their groaning and maintain internal balance, then everything will be fine. Thus, the best defense against “vampirism” and provocations is to strengthen your nervous system, achieve internal balance, and a stable worldview. Regular physical exercise, meditation, yoga, qigong or other areas of spiritual and physical improvement can also help with this. Since it is no coincidence that we meet certain people in our lives, and if you have attracted a “vampire” into the orbit of your communication, then you should think about why this is happening to you and why do you need it? It is possible that precisely in order to become more stable and positively minded. And learn to control and, most importantly, be aware of your emotions.
Kristina Kondratieva is a certified art critic and successful gallery owner. She is engaged in the popularization of new types of contemporary art: icons of Kuznetsov’s writing and paintings in the vision style, as well as supporting Russian designers.
The meeting with the icons of Yuri Kuznetsov in 2004 finally determined the path of Kristina Kondratieva. She spent the time that elapsed from that moment studying the work of the icon painter, which resulted in the creation of the workshop “Icon of the 21st Century. Kuznetsov’s letter”, as well as the publication of a book of the same name.
In one of the reports about Christina’s collection, the correspondent summed up his impressions with the words: “Christina is sure that before the author’s miraculous letter ( it's about Kuznetsov's icons- approx. ed.) even an unbeliever will think seriously about God.” That's what happens! In his icons people find reconciliation with themselves.
- Was your family believers?
No. Dad was a member of the CPSU, mother was not a member of the party, but adhered to atheistic views. But my grandmother was a believer. She was born in 1912 and always went to church. Her life ran parallel to the life led by the other part of my family.
Everyone treated my grandmother like some kind of museum exhibit. If he goes to church, well, let him go. From childhood, she had the same ideas about the world, about faith, about Orthodoxy, as she had absorbed them in her family even before the revolution, and she carried this throughout her life. My grandmother asked me to write notes for peace and health, because she was illiterate. And I, being a girl, didn’t really understand why, but I wrote out of respect for my grandmother - although we were taught that there is no God, and all these are relics of the past.
When I was 14-15 years old, an image of the Mother of God, in my opinion, of Kazan, hung near my bed. It was a big poster, and I find it difficult to say how it appeared and why. At the age of 15, I consciously decided that I wanted to be baptized. No one encouraged me to do this; I remember that it was my own desire that arose from within. I told my mom about this, she didn't mind. We chose a temple, I chose my godmother from among my friends, the most worthy, as I thought. And at the age of 15 I was baptized. I expected a miracle to happen in my life now. But since it did not happen instantly, and, probably, it should not have happened, for some time I even lost interest in the Church.
Then I lived in Israel from the age of 19 to 21 - my friends and I went to the Promised Land in search of a better life. One of my friends asked me to bless a cross or bring something from Jerusalem - so I went to all the holy places. And gradually, thanks to my stay there, inner inspiration was born. Later, in Moscow, when I decided that I would be an art critic and entered Moscow State University, then, seeing holy images in front of me, I finally realized that this world is very dear and close to me, and I want to become a part of it.
How did you meet Yuri Kuznetsov?
Penetration into the world of Christianity in my life occurred through internal sensations, first of all, through the feeling of love. When they first showed me the icon of Yuri Kuznetsov - and it was the image of the Mother of God “Tenderness”, beloved by Seraphim of Sarov - then, looking at it, I felt this all-encompassing maternal love, and the words from the Holy Scriptures and the texts of the holy fathers that the Mother of God is mother of all Christians, became tangible to me. In front of me was not just a picture, but the Most Pure Mother of God herself. I couldn’t take my eyes off the icon; I wanted it to never end. And, of course, I wanted to meet the person who created such a work.
Have there been any challenges along the way?
Everything that happens in my life is based on the belief that the Lord hears everything, knows everything and will offer the best solution to the issue. When they ask me about the gallery, how I was able to open it, I answer the same way as about everything else: according to your faith, be it unto you. Whatever needs to happen will happen. And the right people will appear, and problems will be solved. Any event requires a blessing, and this is a good habit for me.
What thoughts and feelings do you wake up with in the morning?
I must say that morning for me is not the most cheerful time of day. I can’t boast that I get up full of strength. But thanks to the fact that I have Christian values and my favorite thing in my life, for me every new day is an encounter with a miracle. When I wake up, I wait for this miracle with childish curiosity: what interesting things will the day have in store for me today? And I always expect only good things. If something not very pleasant happens, I understand that this is necessary for that same miracle to happen. And you need to take this calmly, pray and wait for the situation to be resolved.
How do you feel about changes in life? There is an expression of the Chinese sages: “God forbid you live in an era of change.”
Our life is not static in principle, it is constantly changing. The icons of Kuznetsov’s writing that I present create such a picturesque space that is constantly changing, depending on the angle from which you look at it, in order to create a feeling of the living presence of the saint. Therefore, I treat any changes as a natural course of life. If there are no changes, this is where you need to think about it. It means something has stopped. But everything in life is rhythmic, and movement is the pulse of life. When we feel it, we live. As soon as there is no movement, life stops. Therefore, any change is for the better.
What do you think is the most positive change that has happened to you in your life?
This is that I found my way and connected my life with Orthodoxy. After that, exactly those people came into my life whom I could not have met otherwise. We have a wonderful friendship, and now we can do a lot together, develop together.
Before I started on this path, I was a fairly lonely person. Some may think that Christian values require loneliness or withdrawal from real life. For me, everything turned out the other way around: thanks to the fact that Christianity came into my life, everything else came with it - people dear and close to me, an interesting life. Everything that exists in my life is thanks to this.
You are surrounded by beauty, and you yourself are a very beautiful woman. How can you explain what a woman's beauty is?
A beautiful woman is one whose eyes glow with love, kindness, compassion, warmth towards the one they look at. If there is love in the heart, it, like an inner fire, makes the outer side of life beautiful. The most important thing is the beauty of the soul.
Is it good to be around this person? So he is handsome. If after communicating with a person you want to do something good, you are in a good mood, then you have received a portion of beauty.
For me, an example of ideal beauty in life is a flower. In the Bible, flowers are given a lot of space, because a flower is the personification of complete acceptance of God's will and maximum return. In favorable conditions, a flower grows, opens and gives us its beauty. We admire it, enjoy the aroma, and it inspires us to positive changes, good deeds and actions. If we are like flowers, we will probably do what we need to do and become closer to God as much as possible.
What, in your opinion, is the purpose of a woman in the modern world?
A woman can give a lot. She is capable of love, her love is compassionate, and if she finds the strength to give this love, first of all, to her loved ones, then she will fulfill her destiny.
If we look at what a woman’s lifestyle was like, say, a hundred years ago and what it is like now, we will see two different images. But, nevertheless, both then and now, female love and compassion are very important, the ability to understand, forgive, accept, take on someone else’s pain - not a physical burden, but what lies on the soul of another person, to lighten his burden in the spiritual and spiritually.
Why is a woman wife the best support for her husband? She sees him in both strength and weakness. If she supports him in his weakness, without letting him know that she sensed his weakness, then he will feel strong and will be able to be a protector and support for the whole family.
