Receptions of marriage swindlers: how gullible women are bred for money. Marriage swindlers: how not to fall for the Alphonse's bait

It is known that the most popular way of dating for the purpose of marriage is the websites of international marriage agencies, where you can find thousands of profiles of single foreigners.

Having registered on one of these sites and received in the very first days a bunch of letters from those who want to get to know her, a woman can fall into euphoria from seemingly close happiness. However, not having the experience of such acquaintances, she may not know what pitfalls are hidden under this wave of attention from the male.

Every woman who registers on a dating site, in addition to decent men, is just a magnet for scammers, scammers and so-called sex tourists. All of them can be called one expression - marriage swindlers.

So, how do marriage scammers deceive women?

To begin with, there are a great many ways, as well as the goals that men of this kind achieve. Let's take each one separately:

1.Scammers.

They are different, and their tricks are also different. They all need only money from you, and they may not disdain even the smallest amounts. Read a separate, more detailed article about scammers and the blacklist of grooms at. Now we will only briefly describe each of the most famous methods of deception:

- "Generous benefactors". The most common and widely known option, which few people already come across, is sending an expensive “gift”, the delivery of which you need to pay for personally.

Almost from the first letter, a man will already talk about love, the desire to create a strong family with you, you will turn out to be exactly the one he has been looking for all his life. Then he, without asking your consent, will write that he sent you a laptop, diamond jewelry or an iPhone of the latest model. But you will have to pay the courier service itself to bring it home to you, a foreign man does not have the right to do it himself.

But he will say that he put 100 euros (or so) in the package to cover these costs. Then you will receive an SMS to your mobile number or an email, and you will be offered to pay for the courier services in any way convenient for you, and we can talk about some 300 rubles (or more).

And if you do not regret such a small amount in exchange for a gift and the promised euro banknote, then replenish the wallet of a swindler who may live in your own city. While this trick was fresh, crowds of our gullible women came across it, now - only a few. Do not replenish their number!

- "Military". Another type of scammers: a handsome man from America or any European country, divorced or widower, most often with one child, writes to you on the site (most likely, a poor boy from Nigeria is hiding behind this handsome man). In most cases, he is a military man, traveling around the world. When, after 5-6 letters, he realizes that he has thoroughly “hooked” you, he will inform you that he must leave for one of the third world countries.

Then, from this country, he will write (or call) with the news that he cannot withdraw a large amount of money from the account (as an option, he must receive an inheritance, found a treasure that he will sell later, etc.), is in a terrible predicament and you are the only one who can help him now.

As soon as he sorts out his problems, he will immediately return everything to you (and even with interest). If you believe and send, your general will safely disappear, or maybe not, sometimes he will ask for more money (depending on the appetite of the scammer). In any case, acquaintance with such military men does not promise you marriage, but only wasted time, nerves and, possibly, money. , what stories are sent to our editorial office by deceived girls.

- Accident victims. A man gets acquainted, falls in love with you and is going to fly to you for a personal meeting. On the day of departure, he gets into an accident, breaks his legs, arms, other parts of the body, and in a very difficult situation ends up in the hospital. You need sympathy and material assistance, which he will definitely return to you. Well, how can you not help a loved one who is in trouble? And a lot of women fall for it.

2. Real marriage swindlers and polygamists.

These will be even more dangerous than scammers, since they are real, meet and fall in love with women for the purpose of marriage (genuine), are excellent psychologists and know how to charm and make a loving woman leave everything in her country for him. Before her departure, as a rule, a legend is invented, believing in which, the unfortunate victim sells her property in her native country or cashes out her bank account (if any), and all for the sake of her beloved and distant.

Arriving to him, she gladly sacrifices her money for the sake of great love, in which she will believe until the cold-blooded and indifferent villain needs it. Having “sucked” everything from the victim to the last penny, he will leave it to the mercy of fate and begin to look for a new one.

Such swindlers pull money out of women very skillfully. Knowing female psychology, they may not even ask for anything, they will simply talk about their grandiose projects, which will eventually bring fabulous money, or about financial problems, because of which they face a prison. Well, what kind of woman will leave her beloved in such trouble and will not help in her endeavors if she has free money? After all, she loves, which means she trusts. And for this trust, they often have to pay a heavy price - the loss of all their property and savings.

3. Sex tourists.

These are the most harmless scammers on dating sites, which, however, are also capable of leaving a wound in the heart of their victim. They are real, in their questionnaires, for the most part, there is truthful information, except for one thing - the purposes of acquaintance. In order to attract as many women as possible, they write that they are not looking for a girlfriend, but a bride, a woman for a serious relationship and creating a strong family, although, at the same time, many of them have been happily married for a long time.

What do they need? Just adventure and free sex. Many of them are forced to fly several times a year to Russia, Ukraine or any other country for work. In order not to miss their arrival, they get to know the girl in advance, sing about love at first sight, and are eager to come to meet her and her family.

Very often, naive victims offer to stay at their own home, and for such a tourist, this is the best option. You do not need to pay for a hotel, there are bed comforts for free.

There is also such a category of tourists whose work is not related to traveling, but who in a similar way master the post-Soviet space. They choose in advance the country they want to visit, get acquainted with a girl (well, everything is standard there), and ask for a visit. Even if you fail to stay with her, a free guide and sex are almost always provided.

A separate article is devoted to the problem of sex tourism on the site. Read on.

4. Dishonest marriage agencies.

Unfortunately, there are also scammers among agencies. But they profit mostly from foreign men, for whom their service is paid. But our women, as a result, remain deceived.

How do they work? They add data to the profiles of men, “adjust” them to the ideal ones, so that as many women as possible write to them. They send a letter from a man addressed to one woman to several others at once, so that the latter get the impression that they are really interested in them. In a word, they do everything to make it seem to women that this agency has a large number of worthy applicants, and to men - that there are a lot of beauties who are interested in them.

The main goal is to keep single women as long as possible, because they attract clients to them. And if there is a shortage of them, unscrupulous agencies can even go for complete deception - create fake profiles using other people's photos, and then conduct correspondence on behalf of non-existent people.

A marriage swindler is a concept as old as the institution of marriage. Alas, there were, are and will be men pretending to be in love in order to solve their problems at the expense of women. It is easy to imagine the resentment and disappointment of a woman who, in the end, will understand that she was shamelessly deceived. Not to mention material losses. By what signs can such a person be recognized?

Marriage swindler: how to protect yourself?

Marriage swindler from a psychological point of view

A marriage swindler is a subtle psychologist. Such a man knows how to ingratiate himself with women. Moreover, he is able to charm a lady not only with personal contacts, but also with virtual communication on the Internet - for example, on dating sites (even from a photo). Therefore, it is not easy to recognize its true essence. But still it is possible!

One of the most common "portraits" of a swindler is a kind, honest, talented, but very unlucky person who is literally pursued by an evil fate. He looks neat and tastefully dressed.

As a result, a woman, touched, will want to help the unfortunate sufferer herself. And that's all the scammer needs

Therefore, if a man, after some time after you met, starts asking you for money, even under a very plausible pretext, or at least hints that he needs help, beware! There is a good chance he is a scammer.

Or, for example, the image of a real hero. The scammer takes advantage of the fact that so many women admire fearless men, strong and reliable. He depicts a man who has been in dangerous situations and withstood all the tests with honor. The lady is delighted that such a man fell in love with her! As a result, the marriage swindler gets his way.

Only reasonable caution and vigilance, which has nothing to do with suspicion, will help here. Find out about this "hero". Try to objectively assess how plausible his stories are.

It does not hurt to seek advice from an experienced and knowledgeable person

What signs can indicate a marriage scammer

In order to make an accurate psychological portrait of the victim, the swindler needs detailed information. Therefore, if a man almost immediately after meeting you begins to meticulously ask you about your tastes, hobbies, how you like to spend your free time, what books you read, etc., this is a reason to be wary.

If even after you have become lovers, he does not want to let you into his territory, that is, he does not tell you his address, does not give you a phone number, does not want to introduce you to loved ones, friends, this is a bad sign. You are most likely dealing with a scammer.

An alarm signal - if a man begins (even in a veiled form) to persuade you to make a profitable investment in some commercial project or asks you for a loan.

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    Guest 13:25 19.04.18

    I have not been successful with men. Maybe due to the fact that she lived in a non-prestigious area and dressed in a way that would not be good. But my mother wanted to marry me, and so my friend and I went to the beach and met the guys. One of them said that he served in Afghanistan and came to the city to help his mother. Well, etc. I met him once, but didn’t go on the next date, so he showed up himself, asking his neighbors where such and such a person lives with that name. My mother, when she saw the guy, oh and oh, because soon after 20 she treated the guy to me, than she could. He began to appear frequently. And what? They feed, water, because with serious intentions, and not just like that. He met his mother. In short, I didn’t want to get married, but my mother convinced me that the guy was what I needed and that there were no stacks in front of me, etc. She left with a heavy heart. But even before the wedding, it turned out that the Afghan did not serve. Why did you lie? Do you need me or an internationalist warrior? Got married. Resigned from work. Mom said that the person was in a difficult situation, you need help. He began to raise his hands to me. Complained to my mother. Answer: "Do not invent! I asked him and he said that this was not." Bottom line: my mother's gold watch was gone, two pairs of my watches, bonds. But this became clear much later. I couldn’t stand it even for a month, I left home, then it seems that my mother agreed to let him go. She gave birth to a child, filed for divorce. The child grew up, and during this time he served several times in prison and once for the murder of his cohabitant. I aged well. Relationship with mother on legs. It's good that we don't live together. I hate my mother! The child did not trust her. Raised by myself. I always considered myself stupid and they told me that my mother was the best, but after marriage I realized that my mother had to let people in the eye - my daughter didn’t stay in girls, and then I began to show character and that mother is the stupidest creature. I was not lucky. Wisdom comes with age, but it happens that age comes alone. We got into fights. She tried to hit me, I hit, she hit me by the hair, and I hit her. The scene is still the same. By the way, my mother was not a mother and we were a burden for her, especially after the divorce from my father. Dad is an indifferent person, he was worried, like mom, about his own well-being ... In general, no one needed me since childhood.

    Reply Complain

Marriage swindlers are a special kind of scammers who use good looks and charm to withdraw funds from overly gullible women. In recent years, the victims of marriage scams are bought not only by these signs, but also by the eloquence shown when communicating online. Are there ways to determine whether a man has sincere feelings or sees only a “money bag” in a lady?

Why does the black list of marriage scammers continue to grow?

Unfortunately, Russian legislation does not provide for the possibility of bringing to criminal liability due to a marriage scam. However, it is possible to punish the offender under articles on taking possession of other people's property or fraud. However, the likelihood of going to jail does not frighten young insolent people, and there is a very simple explanation for this.

No one who likes to replenish his pockets at the expense of a lady's savings almost never resorts to violence or theft.

Their captivating sincerity, gentle look, ability to care and flatter are so comprehensive that numerous victims, without any coercion, draw up powers of attorney for apartments or hand over large sums to their “fans”. Therefore, it is not possible to prove the fact of fraud.

In addition, many ladies prefer to remain silent about such experiences.

More terrible than the loss of property is sometimes the realization of the fact that her trust was taken advantage of without experiencing ardent feelings. By advertising such information, a lady can become a laughingstock in her circle for a long time and give her rival friends a clear advantage in the hidden struggle for the title of the most desirable.

In order not to fall into cunningly set traps, women should carefully look at gentlemen, especially those who are not well known.

Several ways to recognize a marriage scammer

Do not think that a scammer needs special conditions to get to know a potential victim. A fateful meeting can happen anywhere, from a supermarket to a social party.


But most often, an enterprising man is looking for a gullible lady where he is fully able to appreciate her financial capabilities, for example, in popular resorts.

With the growth of opportunities "world wide web" on the Internet, marriage scammers are literally flourishing, using social networks to build trust.

What are the signs of marriage scams that catch your eye?

It is necessary to carefully consider the questions of a new acquaintance and try to get as much information out of him as possible:


  • First of all, you should be wary if an unfamiliar man is carefully interested in the state of financial affairs of a woman who is stranger to him. That is why you should not tell the first person you meet about the presence of movable and immovable property. If the fraudster is already familiar with the size of the desired capital, it is necessary in a conversation, quite by chance, to complain about ruin, large debts, mortgages on an elite apartment, etc. Most often, this acquaintance ends;
  • You can recognize a scammer by how persistently he will ask for a visit. It is advisable not to bring an unverified person into a house where you can profit;
  • Another fact that can bring a liar to clean water is the refusal to provide a phone number or frequent change of numbers, unwillingness to visit public places and constant employment when a woman offers to spend the evening with her friends;
  • Becoming a gigolo is quite difficult if a man is not endowed with an attractive appearance. However, despite the natural beauty and charm, the gentleman diligently hides from the cameras and shows indignation when he learns that the lady managed to secretly capture his beautiful face. By the way, in most cases, the scammer lost his documents or he handed them over, say, to apply for a new passport;
  • Very often, foreigners act as swindlers. Often, having met a Russian woman on a social network, they are so disposed to themselves that the lady is ready for anything, just to keep a real man near her. However, no less often such scams take place in resort countries, where vacationers quickly lose their vigilance under the hot rays of the southern sun.

There are many examples of foreign marriage swindlers, for example, Turks, fooling tourists without feeling the slightest remorse for deceiving women of a foreign nationality and religion.

Marriage swindlers - real stories of famous scammers


Divorce of women for money has been practiced for a long time.

A remarkable example is a story that happened in 1890. Its main protagonist was Alexander Zubkov from the city of Ivanovo, who arrived in Bonn in torn pants.

Thanks to the patronage of a distant relative, Alexander soon met the Dowager Princess Frederica Amalia Wilhelmina Victoria, who by that time was 61 years old.

The 27-year-old rake so turned the head of a lady of refined blood that, despite the scandal in a noble family, she hurried to marry a native of the Russian outback.

The insight came at a cost.

During several months of marriage, the rake lost about 12,000,000 gold marks and ran into debts of 660,000. The impoverished, elderly princess was forced to sell the remaining property and soon died in a suburban hospital. Alphonse himself was declared an unwanted foreigner and expelled from Bonn under the pretext of assault on the messenger.


Someone will decide that the repetition of such a long history in our time is impossible, since women have become much smarter and are unlikely to allow the gentleman to spend his fortune uncontrollably.

A pragmatic accomplished woman is unlikely to fall into the net of a seducer. Yes, the swindler himself will not mess with such a woman. But it is the feelings that are the main tool of the marriage swindler, or rather, the skillful operation of them.

As a rule, a marriage swindler is a talented psychologist and can not only recognize the victim in the crowd, but also find strings that can be influenced in a short time. Speed ​​and pressure in this case play a decisive role. This does not mean that the scammer immediately starts pulling money. Speed ​​is needed in "taming" the victim. Pumping out money is possible only if the person fully trusts the “chosen one”. The main efforts of the swindler are aimed at creating an atmosphere of trust.

Who gets online?

How to "crush" into trust is decided after analyzing the social status of a woman, studying her environment. Yes, and the intellectual level of a potential victim is important in developing a strategy. This does not mean that only naive women become victims of marriage scams, it is simply easier to deceive them. Another question is that it is difficult to find one with a lot of money, but there are other technologies for deceiving them.

How does the swindler dispose of his victim? First of all - words of love, beautiful courtship, gifts. Do not think that a marriage swindler is a priori greedy. The cost of gifts from the swindler is included in the expense item. Moreover, another victim can become a source of gifts, since a professional marriage swindler can simultaneously work in several directions.

How to recognize a marriage scammer: scenarios and losses

The most primitive and fairly harmless option is sex tourism. A petty swindler, enters into trust and begs for a close acquaintance. As a rule, the goal is free accommodation and a table during a business trip or excursion. The only material damage that a scam of this kind can cause to a woman is the cost of maintenance, and it is also possible that the swindler will take a golden strainer as a keepsake.

More serious damage is done by professional scammers who can bring the relationship to the conclusion of an official marriage. Being in an official relationship implies complete trust on the part of a woman. She will no longer refuse to sell her property in order to move in with her husband, to take a loan in her name for a decent amount for the global projects of her newly baked spouse.

A swindler may ask to take a loan, referring to various circumstances - the illness of the mother, debts, the construction of a new "nest". Having received the requested amount, the scammer disappears, leaving the victim with debts and mental trauma. This category of swindlers is called "polygamists" and more often they work on fake passports.

What to look for when meeting?

1. The new acquaintance avoids public places where he can be identified by previous or parallel victims.

2. He avoids being photographed, posting joint photos on social networks.

3. (and the wallet) under any pretext refuses to meet the woman's friends and does not introduce her surroundings and generally hides her past.

4. The absence of identity documents should be alarming, but their presence should not relax either, as false or duplicate ones may be presented.


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