How to tell a man that he is on his period. How to properly tell a guy about your period

This moment may embarrass you, but believe me, every woman has gone through this. This is not at all as terrible as it might seem at first glance.

There is absolutely no shame in discussing the menstrual cycle as part of the amazing structure of the female reproductive system. Despite the liberated nature of our society, very few women can freely discuss the topic of menstruation, usually such conversations make us nervous and lower our voices. After all, women live in a male society that tells us that menstruation is a dirty period, it is shameful, taboo, a curse. But patriarchy only came into our society about 5,000 years ago. Before this, women were revered as the head of the family, as deities. Women noted the connection of the menstrual cycle with the phases of the Moon, and we know that the foundations of astronomy, the development of the calendar and mathematics are associated with these same phases.

1. Approach the situation carefully if your boyfriend is a teenager of 13-14 years old.

At this age, boys are poorly acquainted with physiology and issues of tact. Don't use words that seem too scientific. Say it as casually as possible.

2. If the guy is older, it makes things a little easier.

Surely he already had a girlfriend who talked to him about periods. Talking to him about these things is a step forward in your relationship, as there will be more trust and understanding. Don't be too shy - it's inappropriate and will disrupt the conversation.

3. Speak softly

Don't appear angry or be rude. In this case, he may feel guilty that it is not up to him or that he should have known but had no idea.

4. Use terms that won't make you blush.

But it’s also impossible to say nothing or vague synonyms.

5. If you are afraid to tell your guy about your period, then most likely your relationship is not that close, think about it.

6. If you're going to have sex, tell them you're on your period.

You must set boundaries on what is allowed, your body must be comfortable. Keep in mind that some religions have a negative attitude towards women during this period, and you should be sure that your boyfriend will take the situation in stride.

7. Above all, trust him!


There will be nothing wrong if you discuss everything calmly.

Hints

Do not use incomprehensible expressions or jargon, the guy may not understand them and the conversation will turn out to be crumpled and incomprehensible, which will lead to the fact that you will look strange in his eyes.

Don't be afraid to trust him! Menstruation is not a problem, but simply part of intimate life.

Remember: menstruation is completely natural and nothing to be ashamed of!

If you've been dating for a while and the guy is old enough, you can just say, "Not right now, I'm having those days" or something similar.

Errors

Do not tell in detail your feelings and all the side effects. This will most likely push him away.

If your relationship is just beginning, then you should not talk about menstruation in advance.

For every girl, critical days are a common everyday thing. You quickly get used to it and you don’t feel embarrassed at all when speaking among girls. But it’s a completely different matter when you need to tell your boyfriend about your period. During these days, the girl often experiences mood changes. And the guy needs to know about this so that he doesn’t get offended by actions for which we are currently not responsible.

First, think is it worth talking about this?. How will this affect your relationship? Perhaps he already knows or guesses?! If this is so, then maybe it’s not worth talking about. But if you have sudden mood swings, you can be offended by him for no reason at the present time - it’s worth telling. He must be ready and must know that there is a reason for this. And that you still love him and are telling him to warn him. So that if something like this happens so that it doesn't have any impact influence on your relationship.
Tell your boyfriend about your period maybe softly. For example, explain that at a certain period, girls’ stomachs begin to ache and at this time feelings and emotions become aggravated. You don't have to talk about your blood loss. It would be unnecessary.

If a guy knows about menstruation

If a guy knows what menstruation is, then you don’t have to try to get out of it, but tell him directly about them. Just say: “I have those days, I don’t feel well,” or “I have guests, if you know what I mean". Then he himself will understand everything and will probably either turn the topic into a joke or won’t think about it anymore. If you met a guy not yesterday, and you have become close to each other, then you can tell him how best to behave with you at this time. This will help both him and you. If he knows how to deal with you correctly, then you will have less nerves and philosophical thoughts about why he did what he did.

Children grow up, and every day parents have to solve new problems in relation to education. At a certain point, mom and dad understand that it’s time to explain to their offspring what menstruation is. Parents may even argue over which of them should initiate a conversation about a sensitive topic. How to explain to a child what menstruation is and at what age should the conversation begin?

While raising a child, parents must plan to discuss sensitive topics.

When to start a conversation?

Sometimes parents delay the conversation, believing that the child has not yet reached sufficient maturity. When to start a conversation? Is there a universal age at which you should definitely talk to your offspring? It turns out that each child can be ready to perceive this or that information in its own time. There are several factors to consider:

  • A girl can start her period at 11 or even 10 years old, so you need to talk to her in advance.
  • It is worth taking a closer look at the child and assessing how much interest he or she shows in “forbidden topics.”
  • Sometimes the offspring himself begins to ask questions about the physiological characteristics of women and men. If he is over 8 years old, then it is quite possible to start answering his questions in detail.
  • If your son’s classmates do not hide their interest in issues of gender and relationships between girls and boys. Such conversations sometimes arise in a group of children; adults can witness jokes on this topic.

Parents themselves can feel the time when they need to delicately tell their daughter about the stages of a girl’s growing up. The boy will also need this information; he should certainly know that girls sometimes feel unwell, and this is one of the reasons why they should not be treated rudely.



A girl's period can start quite early, so she should be prepared for it

Preparing for the conversation

Dear reader!

This article talks about typical ways to solve your issues, but each case is unique! If you want to know how to solve your particular problem, ask your question. It's fast and free!

Some parents just need to start a conversation and the words come to mind. Others have difficulty choosing phrases, especially when the question concerns sensitive topics. If you consider yourself to be the second type, it makes sense to prepare for the conversation using the materials at hand:

  • Look for special literature that explains in accessible language how menstruation (regula) occurs in women. This could be a children's encyclopedia, a magazine for parents. You can read the material and present it to the girl with your own comments. In addition, she will be able to subsequently read this information herself, look at pictures and photographs if questions arise.
  • It would be great if you could find video materials on this topic. You can watch a movie or even a cartoon with your daughter, answering her questions along the way.


If the upcoming conversation seems very difficult to mom, she can find information in a book for parents

Basic Concepts

How to structure a conversation correctly? How to tell a girl about her period without her feeling disgusted or scared? What should you talk about right away, and what should you leave for later? First of all, you need to think about the structure of the conversation in advance, and then the order in which it is best to present the information. We propose to arrange the stages of the conversation in the following sequence:

  1. Girls are little women. First, we need to remind you that any girl will grow into a woman who can become a mother in the future. Women have reproductive organs that allow them to bear a fetus - the uterus and ovaries. The girl also has these same organs, but they are still small and grow with her.
  2. Preparing for future motherhood. At a certain age (11-14 years), the girl’s body signals that it is entering a new stage - preparation for future motherhood. The girl begins to menstruate. It should be mentioned that almost all women experience bleeding; there is nothing terrible or shameful in this process.
  3. Hygiene. Separately, we need to talk about the fact that during critical days you need to maintain hygiene especially carefully. During this period, pathogenic microflora can reach internal organs more easily than usual, which leads to diseases of the genitourinary system. Gaskets should be changed regularly and water procedures should not be neglected.
  4. What is PMS? This terrible abbreviation, which almost everyone knows about, stands for “premenstrual syndrome.” It is imperative to warn your daughter that during this period she may have mood swings, she may cry for no apparent reason or feel offended and lonely. The main thing a girl should know is that this condition is temporary, it will certainly pass.

We strive for dialogue

It is not enough to talk in general terms about menstruation; it is important to wait for questions. If a daughter or son does not ask anything after the story, most likely the child is not ready to discuss this issue with his parents. There may be several reasons: the daughter already knows a lot from communicating with her classmates, or she does not trust her parents and is embarrassed to talk about intimate topics.

Both options require careful consideration. What to do if the offspring does not make contact? It is worth waiting a couple of days after the conversation - the teenager may need time to comprehend the information, and a little later he will come to his parents with his questions. If the child continues to remain silent and does not return to this topic, then action is needed. Try to talk again, ask what worries him and what he knows about “critical days.”

Maybe someone has already provided the teenager with distorted information and he thinks it’s shameful to talk about it. We need to try to find out what the offspring is afraid of, what exactly he already knows. It is very important to explain to him what is true and what is fiction.

It happens that the conversation doesn’t work out - you shouldn’t give up. Any conversation is better than silence and ignoring the problem.



If the child is not ready to make contact, there is no need to insist; we will be able to talk later

Questions to answer

Since telling your daughter about her period with all the details is quite difficult, it is worth preparing for the conversation in advance and thinking about how to answer questions that may arise during the conversation. Often a teenager is curious about how painful critical days are, how many days they last, and what to do if they start unexpectedly? If a boy is growing up in the family, you also need to talk to him about this topic, but the conversation can be shorter and more general. We will try to answer the most popular questions from children about menstruation.

Do periods hurt?

The girl may worry that the bleeding is accompanied by pain. It is necessary to explain that usually the adjustments are painless, only at the beginning of the cycle discomfort may occur in the lower abdomen. However, each girl experiences her own sensations and some complain of abdominal pain, upset bowel movements, and dizziness. It is also worth talking about the fact that before menstruation, the breasts swell and become painful.



Some women experience painful periods, but this should not initially frighten your daughter.

How much blood flows out?

Often girls feel as if blood is flowing from the vagina; this picture is especially frightening to those who are afraid of the sight of it. The mother must answer this question in order to talk about the regulations based on personal impressions. Bloody discharge is usually heterogeneous, often quite thick. For some women, the discharge may be scanty, while for others it may be copious. In this case, the blood that leaves is already “used” and is not required for the functioning of the body. Everything in the human body is thought out and arranged in the best possible way. New blood is generated to replace lost blood, which is a natural and even beneficial process.

Sometimes a girl is worried about the question of whether it is possible to lose a lot of blood during her critical days. Of course, situations may be different. During this period, you should not subject your body to active physical activity, so as not to cause bleeding, but you should not spend the whole day in bed. You need to lead a normal lifestyle with some restrictions.

Pads or tampons?

If the daughter’s age is approaching the cherished 11 years, she is increasingly looking forward to her first menstruation. It's time to prepare a supply of sanitary pads or tampons with your mother. What is better to use? This issue is controversial today. Some gynecologists are inclined towards sanitary pads, others are not so critical and fully accept the idea that a young girl can use special tampons. We want to emphasize the aspect that tampons are quite difficult to insert, while pads are more comfortable and easy to use.



If we consider different types of hygiene products, pads are the most convenient to use.

You should also be prepared for the fact that questions may concern conception, contraception, and intimate relationships between a man and a woman. You should consider in advance how much information you can give to your daughter or son, depending on their maturity.

Warned means everything is in order!

It is not enough to tell your daughter that almost all women have periods; you also need to explain to your daughter how they go in teenagers. It is necessary to warn her that at first the cycle may be disrupted and menstruation will be uneven. On Dr. Komarovsky’s website there is information that in the first year after menarche, the cycle can range from 20 to 90 days. Setting up a cycle may take six months, even a year or two; you should not worry about this. In order to estimate the number of days between regulations, you need to keep a calendar. It is enough to buy the girl a small copy and ask her to mark the dates in it when her period begins.

Sometimes a mother believes that her daughter is just a child and is not interested in the opposite sex - even in this case, it is worth being the first to raise the topic of a possible pregnancy. Explain that menstruation means the opportunity to become pregnant, but does not at all indicate the body’s readiness to bear a child. A girl who has already started her period must take responsibility for her body and her life.



Early pregnancy is rarely desired, so it is better to talk to the girl about this topic in advance

What is not worth talking about?

You can talk about regulations in your own words, and you can also build a conversation according to your own ideas. However, you should not scare the child and tell the young girl about any complications that are quite possible:

  • You cannot limit the time of the first menstruation (menarche) to strict limits. A girl who hasn't had her period at 13 will think she has some kind of abnormality. It is better to wait a little and consult a pediatric gynecologist.
  • You should not prepare your daughter in advance for the fact that periods are painful, otherwise she will increase her fear in anticipation. Also, one should not give them too little importance, saying that menstruation goes unnoticed. This process is physiological, you should prepare for it in advance, but do not give up your habits.
  • You can’t talk about periods as if their onset is something shameful that should be kept silent about. On the contrary, monthly menstruation is a normal process that happens to every woman. At the same time, you can only talk about them with close people, without making intimate details public.

Talk openly with your child to prepare him for new circumstances. You shouldn’t put off the conversation, because it’s better if a girl learns about menstruation from her mother than from someone else. Such conversations strengthen relationships and help parents better understand their child. It is very important not to lose contact with him, especially on the threshold of a difficult and interesting teenage period.

The result of a natural process in the body of every girl who has already gone through puberty. Thus, the uterus gets rid of the exfoliated endometrium and unfertilized egg. The topic of menstruation can be calmly discussed with your mother, friends and your gynecologist, but many representatives of the fair sex are ashamed to tell their boyfriend about the arrival of menstruation.

How do guys really feel about women's periods? Is it worth devoting them to such a sensitive topic? How to tell your boyfriend about your period to avoid feelings of shame and embarrassment? You will find the answer to these and many other questions in this article.

How men feel about periods

Since menstruation is an integral process in the life of every sexually mature woman, you should learn to correctly report its arrival to your sexual partner. Not every man is sexually liberated and can adequately perceive the information that his beloved has begun monthly bleeding. How guys feel about menstruation in adulthood largely depends on their upbringing in the family. If this topic was never touched upon by the boy’s parents during sex education, then as an adult he may have exaggerated fantasies and fears about menstruation. A man’s sexual partner will suffer from his lack of education, from whom he will begin to isolate himself and avoid him during his menstrual periods.

The extremely negative attitude towards menstruation on the part of guys can be explained by widespread stories that at this time the girl is very aggressive, suspicious and emotionally unstable. Due to the truly unpleasant symptoms of premenstrual syndrome, negative opinion has also affected the topic of menstruation.

Depending on their age, men have different attitudes towards the arrival of their significant other’s periods. Until the age of 30, most guys are upset by the impossibility of intimate intimacy, while a quarter of respondents, on the contrary, are happy about the opportunity to experiment with sex during this period. 20% of guys under 30 use their girlfriend’s period as a reason for cheating and as an excuse to relax with friends, and 15% take a break from a hectic sex life.

Men after 30 years of age, in 30% of cases, are glad that during their period they have the opportunity to have a reasonable break from fulfilling marital duties, and only in 20% of cases are they upset because of collapsed plans for an intimate relationship. 10% of men avoid and fear a woman who has started her period, this is a fairly large percentage, but if you and your partner have a trusting relationship, then after a frank conversation the situation can improve. It is important to correctly convey information about the naturalness of the menstrual process and its importance in the life of every woman, while it is necessary to use the right psychological approach to a man so as not to alienate him.

Is the topic of menstruation taboo?

In different eras and in different cultures, the attitude towards menstruation was twofold: on the one hand, women during this period were credited with supernatural abilities, and on the other hand, they were considered “dirty” and were not allowed to visit public places. In some nationalities, a woman became an outcast during her period; she ate from a separate bowl, did not talk to anyone, and did not touch anyone. This attitude towards critical days still exists in some backward tribes, although even a quarter of a century ago in developed countries, the majority of people during a survey said that under no circumstances should the topic of menstruation be mentioned in the presence of a man.

Psychologists say that an inadequate reaction on the part of a man to the fact that a girl’s period came may be associated with a fear of blood, as well as with a hostile attitude towards everything incomprehensible and unusual. If your young man did not receive normal sex education in childhood, and his parents did not explain to him that menstruation is a physiological process, you should tell him about the characteristics of the female body. A loving and understanding partner will not isolate himself or avoid a woman, knowing that menstruation is natural.

How to tell a guy about red days

It is unlikely that anyone would want to deliberately bring up the topic of menstruation in a conversation with their partner, but there are situations when it is better to tell your boyfriend that you are on your period:

  • if a young man sees your secrecy and isolation and suspects that you are deceiving him;
  • if you are planning to spend time together on the beach, in the pool or some kind of sporting event related to weight lifting;
  • the guy hints at intimacy;
  • if you have emotional swings, you are overly irritated, and this is very noticeable to your boyfriend.

If you are not in a close, trusting relationship with a young man, you can not initiate him into the intricacies of your situation, but refer to illness and reschedule plans for another day. But if you trust each other, then it is better to inform the guy about the arrival of menstruation, perhaps his sympathy and care will help cope with the emotional discomfort of this period. In this regard, very often a girl wonders, how exactly to inform a young man about the arrival of her critical days?

Teenager

In adolescence, guys hardly need to explain all the intricacies of how the female body works, especially since such a topic can greatly confuse and scare them away. Just mention the arrival of your period casually, without focusing attention on it. Do not use allegorical or complex medical terms during the conversation and ask him not to tell his friends about this conversation.

Guy 15-20 years old

At this age, it is easier to explain to a guy the essence of the processes occurring in a woman’s body during menstruation, because he has already received basic knowledge in biology lessons or from parents and friends. You can think about the conversation in advance, choose simple terms, avoiding rudeness and harshness.

Over 20

You can talk to older men about menstruation directly and without allegory. An understanding partner will support and help alleviate the condition, and in some cases will simply give you the opportunity to relax and be alone. At a more mature age, you don’t need to think long about how to tell a guy about your period; usually he already knows and understands everything himself; a subtle hint is enough.

To make the conversation with your guy go smoothly and with a positive reaction, use a few tips:

  • communicate with a teenager 13-14 years old as delicately as possible;
  • with an older guy, don’t be shy and communicate confidentially;
  • speak softly without vague terms and synonyms;
  • if you are afraid to tell your guy about your period, it means your relationship is not too close;
  • Be sure to warn your partner about your period before sex so that it does not become an unpleasant surprise for him.

First of all, you need to trust your partner, then the question of whether you need to tell him about your critical days will not even arise.

How do I tell my boyfriend that I'm on my period? A question that makes not only teenage girls, but also young girls worry and feel embarrassed. Despite the sexual liberation of modern society, menstruation is still a taboo topic for some of its representatives. How to behave, where to start a conversation?

Teenagers learn about the physiology of the female and male body in high school. Together with the girls, the boys receive minimal knowledge about the natural processes in a woman’s body and become familiar with the concept of menstruation. In the girls' conversation, the topic of menstruation comes up from time to time; there is an active discussion of pads, tampons, and problems with well-being. At the same time, the guys become casual listeners and receive information in this way. When the time comes for the first sexual experience, both partners already know what menstruation is. Therefore, there is no need to inflate the topic of critical days too much.

Why do difficulties arise?

For adult women, the situation with menstruation does not cause any inconvenience. They simply tell their partner about it openly. It is more difficult for girls to tell boys about menstruation, since teenagers' reactions may not be entirely adequate. This is what the female gender is afraid of. However, it is much easier to start a conversation about menstruation if there is mutual understanding and trust between the partners. There is nothing to worry about if the guy doesn’t get what he wants, he’ll wait a few days. On the contrary, she herself will certainly appreciate his caring attitude towards her beloved’s body. At the end of the critical days during sex, the girl will reward her beloved in full for the days of waiting.

The first love, which is often accompanied by the first sexual experience, is not always reciprocated. Some guys simply take advantage of women's trust and meet a girl just for sex. In such situations, menstruation always causes irritation, dissatisfaction and other negative reactions in the partner. If menstruation threw a guy out of balance, he began to be offended, angry, you need to reconsider your attitude towards him, open your eyes to what is happening. Accept the truth, no matter how bitter it may be.

How to tell a guy about your period?

Usually the need for such a conversation arises in a situation where a guy hints through words or actions about sex. A confident girl will simply say: “I can’t, I’m on my period!” Sorry! It's a pity!" Or this option: “I’m having my period, I’ll have to wait a little!” Further events will develop according to several scenarios.

  1. The guy will stop the affection and treat the situation with understanding.
  2. He will say that he is not afraid of blood, menstruation does not bother him. He will continue to insist.
  3. Offer alternative sex.

How should the girl behave next? Every woman has periods
proceed differently. Some people don’t even notice them, feel fine, no problems. Others suffer from abdominal pain, weakness, and bleeding. In the first case, the girl may succumb to temptation and agree to have sex. Moreover, if it’s the first or last day, there is minimal blood. In this case, it is worth worrying about maintaining strict hygiene of both partners before and after sexual intercourse. If these conditions cannot be met, sex will have to be abandoned. You cannot make love if there is severe abdominal pain or bleeding. The answer must be categorical - “No!” Well, as for alternative sex - oral, anal, it's a small matter. Consent must be mutual, no violence against oneself.

Hints work too

You can notify the guy about the current situation long before he begins to act actively. Just say on the phone that you’re not feeling well today. This will be followed by the question: “Why, what happened?” Answer: “Critical days”, “Women’s problems”, “Menstruations”. This issue is closed. The guy will already be informed before the date begins.

Another option is to casually show him a pad or tampons in your purse. The guy will either understand everything silently or start the conversation himself. In this case, you will only have to confirm his suspicions.

If it’s too awkward to talk, you can wait for active action. When the guy starts caressing, he will feel the presence of a pad or tampon in his panties, and everything will become clear. However, in this case, a reproach may follow: “Why didn’t you tell me?” All that remains is to smile and shrug.

Menstruation is a natural process in the female body, there is nothing shameful about it. All grown men understand this, and young men should also enter into the situation. Whether to have sex during menstruation or not is a purely individual question. Sexual intercourse should not cause discomfort to either man or woman.

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