Puberty of girls. Teenagers: a difficult age

Your daughter is a wonderful helper at home and diligent student at school . Time flies quickly and the girl is already out of childhood, The only favorite toy left is the teddy bear , with whom it is so pleasant to fall asleep... but problems of adolescence began to appear. A teenage girl has new hobbies and friends, her character changes, she tries to pay more attention to her appearance, and recently things have not been as smooth as before with her studies... In this material we will discuss issues such as: associated with growing up girls and we’ll tell parents how to deal with emerging problems. during adolescence in girls.

The transitional (pubertal) period in a girl is the time of sexual development and maturation of the child. What age is transitional according to child psychologists? Each child is individual and a girl’s puberty may begin earlier or later than her peers. But most girls turn into teenagers between the ages of 10 and 14-15.

The work of hormones in the child’s body is activated, the daughter grows faster, the body changes, takes on more feminine forms, the genitals begin to function differently, and hair grows on the skin. But changes during adolescence in growing girls affect not only the body: the girl matures morally, her values, psychology and perception of the world around her change. Parents, especially mothers, must help their child cross this barrier into adulthood.

Most girls in adolescence height and weight indicators are slightly higher than those of boys. A thirteen-year-old schoolgirl is often dissatisfied with her appearance (irregularly shaped ears, close-set eyes), figure and weight. It is necessary to convince your daughter that she is beautiful and attractive; the opinions of her mother and older sister are very important to her. Acne on the face, which often appear during adolescence in girls, is the most common problem during this period. Make an appointment for the girl to see a cosmetologist, buy her special products to combat teenage acne.

Dream books, horoscopes and various fortune telling are new interests for your daughter. Also, during adolescence, girls will develop their first sympathies for the opposite sex. Unrequited feelings can cause stress. The child seems to be torn into two parts: it seems that he needs to study, but his head is occupied with something completely different, he thinks only about love and relationships. Find the strength in yourself to support your daughter, have a heart-to-heart talk with her, give her advice (not order).

A teenage girl in adolescence is increasingly interested in relationships with boys. Tell her about sexual relations and contraceptive options. It is important that a teenage girl can trust her parents. If your daughter has a boyfriend, carefully monitor the situation, but do not go too far with instructions and moralizing.

During adolescence, girls have a fear of becoming a black sheep in the company of girlfriends. The girl wants to be like everyone else: dress like her peers, have similar accessories. Appearance is very important to her now.

A growing child is ready to take an active part in cleaning the house and learn to cook basic meals. , wash the dishes. All these skills will be useful to your daughter in the future; don’t be afraid to increase the list of her household responsibilities.

Every girl should have a hobby (knitting, embroidery, making crafts with her own hands ). Doing what you love gives you inspiration, and you can brag about its results among your friends. Make sure that your daughter correctly perceives all the pros and cons of her appearance and does not exaggerate the problems.

Next, we will tell you in detail about the main problems appear during adolescence in girls and ways for parents to help during this difficult period for the child. A psychologist's advice will help you find a common language with a teenage girl and help you overcome problems so that the transitional age for your child is less painful.

So, we have smoothly approached one of the difficult and important periods in a girl’s life -. This period begins at approximately 12-13 years of age and lasts until adulthood. At this time, a fully grown girl, when comparing herself with adults, can come to the conclusion that, in principle, there is practically no difference between her and adults. At the same time, the girl begins to feel like an adult, and will resolutely avoid her relationship with children. This is a special period and very difficult.

Despite all the apparent external maturity, the girl herself and those around her do not have the feeling that she is truly and fully grown, but at the same time the girl has a great desire for those around her to recognize her adulthood. Scientists and psychologists describe this transitional age as a certain special interval between children's games and the serious, responsible actions and deeds of adults, and thus call this period “serious games.” Girls in adolescence look with disdain at children's games; they no longer want to deal with toys that were very close and beloved until recently. All her affairs that she undertakes are of a very serious nature, the girl’s intentions are also full of seriousness, but this is so far only to a certain limit.

However, in reality, everything that the girl does is not yet fully realized and carried out by her; she is only trying out new social roles for herself. Examples of such new actions and affairs can be relationships with the opposite sex and “love games” with flirting and coquetry, dreamy and romantic actions. During this period, girls may be no less superficial about choosing a future profession and preparing to enter educational institutions after school, as well as about playing any sports or participating in any events. Such types and patterns of behavior will be especially important for the development of the personality of a teenage girl, since in such situations she will learn many new qualities. She will learn to measure her desires and strengths, set goals and achieve them, establish relationships with various kinds of interests in order to understand what is truly interesting and important.

Features of health at this age

Puberty, or the process of a girl becoming a girl, is usually considered to begin with the appearance of her first menstruation. If earlier girls began menstruating at the age of 13-15 years, then today’s accelerated girls can begin menstruating as early as 11-12 years old. And if the girl is not prepared for this process, it will be stressful for her. If there is blood on the underwear, the girl may experience stress and be afraid to tell her mother about what happened, or she may simply begin to panic that she has some kind of illness. Therefore, mothers should take care of this in advance and tell their daughter that she is growing up and will soon have her period of menstruation, which will be accompanied by just such phenomena. It is important to explain this in detail, calmly and clearly, that this is a normal period of female maturation, and that it is worth rejoicing that the girl is becoming an adult.

Naturally, the girl will need to be taught how to use hygiene products and behave during menstruation so that they are as comfortable as possible for her. Regular menstruation may not be established immediately, and it will take about a year to a year and a half after the first menstruation until the cycle evens out. It is also important to tell the girl that the appearance of her first menstruation when her cycle is not yet established is an opportunity, albeit mostly theoretical, to become pregnant. Therefore, it is necessary to talk about sex life and contraception, as well as the moral and ethical consequences of early sexual intercourse. Modern girls grow up early, and accordingly, many of them begin their sex life also early, no matter how much we would like to believe them and think that they are just babies.

A normal menstrual cycle will be considered to be in length from 21 to 32-35 days, and the cycle is considered to be from the first day of menstruation to the first day of the next menstruation. Mom, at least at first, needs to carefully monitor the frequency of changing pads and the abundance and duration of the girl’s discharge; normal first periods can last up to seven to ten days, but then the cycle shortens to 3-6 days. It is also important to remember that recently established menstruation and the cycle may still be unstable, and they can easily go astray under the influence of unfavorable external and internal factors. A young girl’s period may not start on time due to climate change or stress, heavy loads and overwork, due to serious illnesses and hypothermia. Such delays in menstruation or earlier, untimely onset will not yet indicate the presence of any disorders in the field of reproductive health, but you still need to monitor this.

Special attention, moms!

It is important to pay attention to deviations in your daughter’s puberty and consult a doctor in the following cases. This is necessary if the first menstruation lasted less than three days or lasted more than 10 days; this requires contacting a gynecologist. The presence of bleeding with a decrease in hemoglobin and a disturbance in general well-being is especially dangerous; these are signs of inattention to reproductive health and serious abnormalities. It is also worth consulting a doctor if there are no periods at the age of 14-15 years or a break of more than 2-3 months after the first menstruation. It is completely wrong for women to think that irregular periods are not dangerous, and that after marriage and the birth of children everything will work out on its own. Such irregular cycles can be serious health problems and can lead to infertility.

If a girl has such complaints about pain in the lower abdomen (and in the absence of menstruation), which usually occurs during menstruation, a feeling of tension and discomfort in the living, it is also important to visit a gynecologist. Such complaints can result from abnormalities in the development of the genitals with the opening in the hymen area becoming overgrown, and then when blood accumulates, it may protrude outward due to tension and filling of the vagina with bloody discharge. In this case, it is important not to miss the moment, since stagnation of blood can lead to its outflow into the fallopian tubes and into the ovarian area of ​​the abdominal cavity. And then serious medical intervention will be required.

Also, menstruation in girls who are not sexually active can be somewhat painful due to the presence of the hymen, which can sometimes interfere with the normal flow of blood. Usually, after the start of sexual intercourse, such pain goes away. But if there is severe discomfort and pain, it is worth showing the girl to a gynecologist, and the doctor will be able to more accurately determine the causes of painful menstruation - this could be infantility and immaturity of the genital area, the presence of hormonal problems in the body, the presence of an infectious-inflammatory process, and even the presence of surgical pathologies. In addition, pain is possible due to not only pathologies, but also the presence of strong muscles in the internal organs (smooth muscles), if the girl actively plays a lot of sports or dances.

Features of girls of this age

Girls at this age are susceptible to stress, and, according to specialist research, acute or chronic stress can become a trigger for many disorders in the health of teenage girls. This may include painful menstruation, bleeding from the uterus, delayed menstruation until it stops completely (amenorrhea). Also, after a growth spurt has occurred during prepuberty, the girl’s body weight begins to increase due to the formation of fat deposits in the abdomen and thighs. This is a completely normal process of forming a feminine figure, which leads many girls to complexes - they consider themselves fat. Due to this, food restrictions are formed, and sudden weight loss at a given age can lead to metabolic and endocrine changes that are difficult to correct, developmental delays, and many diseases. It is important to remember that this type of fat deposits is medically called “puppy fat” and as you grow and mature, they gradually disappear, replaced by muscle and connective tissue.

A particular disorder in girls is caused by skin problems, which manifest themselves in excessive activity of the sebaceous or sweat glands, which gives an unpleasant odor of body sweat. Hair can quickly get dirty, and pimples and pustules can appear on the skin of the back, chest and face. During this period, you need to pay special attention to hygiene, as well as maintain the correct daily routine and diet. Due to such actions, you can significantly reduce the appearance of discomfort and hormonal imbalance. Usually, with the establishment of regular menstruation, all skin problems go away. Puberty itself ends at about 18 years of age.

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Many parents, unfortunately, do not quite understand what adolescence is like for girls. Signs that tell them that a new period is beginning in their daughter's life are often simply ignored. Adults forget about their own childhood and adolescence, and therefore, when their beloved daughter reaches adolescence, they are completely unprepared for the changes that are taking place. Moms and dads have no idea when girls’ adolescence begins and at what age it ends, what changes in their physiological and psychological state are normal and what are not, what problems accompany this period and how to deal with them.

What is adolescence?

Adolescence is a rather difficult period that every child goes through in the process, a fact confirmed by both psychologists and doctors. During this period of time, children's perception of the world and consciousness changes, and their body is subject to significant physiological changes.

Sooner or later, every parent raising their beloved daughter wonders at what age girls begin adolescence. Unfortunately, there is no clear answer to this question, since this period does not have strict time limits. The transitional age in girls, the signs and symptoms that characterize it, differ and depend on the individuality of each individual. However, among psychologists it is customary to conditionally divide the transitional age into three main phases:

What physiological changes accompany adolescence?

How to determine that a girl has begun adolescence? The signs are usually obvious, so attentive parents are unlikely to miss this moment. From a physiological point of view, the following age-related changes take place:

Anomalies of puberty

Parents need to be very careful during the period when girls begin adolescence. Signs of any deviations must be identified in a timely manner, since any delay is fraught with serious consequences. Moms and dads should sound the alarm if:

1. The mammary glands begin to grow too early. We are talking about premature breast growth if this occurs when the girl is not yet 8 years old.
2. characterized by the onset of puberty in girls under 8-10 years of age.
3. Premature hair growth in the pubic area and armpits.
4. Premature or late onset of menstruation.
5. Late puberty, characterized by the absence of signs of puberty in girls aged 13-14 years.

Despite the fact that there is no specific date when adolescence begins in girls, the symptoms described above should alert parents. If any of them are detected, it is recommended to consult a doctor for advice.

Diseases of adolescence

Puberty is accompanied by serious changes throughout the body. Health status is also affected. Problems that arise psychologically place additional stress on the body, as a result of which it sometimes fails.

What diseases occur when girls begin adolescence? Do the symptoms of these diseases manifest themselves in any way or not?

As a rule, illnesses characteristic of adolescence are temporary. Among the most common, the following should be noted:

and adolescence

In girls, signs of puberty usually appear at the age of 12-13 years. They grow quickly, and in just one year their height can increase by 5-10 cm. Puberty of girls begins with a sharp development of the mammary glands and, of course, the genitals. The body takes on a more rounded shape, subcutaneous fats are deposited on the buttocks and thighs, and intensive hair growth begins on the pubis and armpits. At the same time, changes occur in character. Girls become more shy, they flirt more and more often with boys, and fall in love for the first time.

One of the most important signs of puberty is the onset of the first menstruation. At this time, changes take place in the cardiovascular and respiratory systems. Mood swings, increased fatigue and headaches are observed. Therefore, when menstruation begins, doctors recommend that girls spend more time in the fresh air, do not expose the body to excessive physical activity, and get more rest.

What psychological problems do girls experience during adolescence?

For teenage girls, how others perceive them is of great importance. It is very important for them how they look and what impression they make on members of the opposite sex, that is, boys. They spend a lot of time in front of the mirror and closely study the changes that their body has undergone. Often girls are very critical of themselves and remain dissatisfied with their appearance. In addition, adolescents experience frequent mood swings, which is explained by the increased release of sex hormones into the blood. Hormones are also the cause of excess sexual energy. However, the girl cannot yet realize this energy due to her age. As a result, she becomes aggressive, brash and disobedient. Parents should be patient and not forget that during this period in adolescents the adrenal cortex functions much more intensely, and that is why their child is constantly in a state of stress.

What complexes do girls develop during puberty?

New problems arise in the family when girls reach adolescence. Photos of an intimate nature in a desk drawer, a mountain of cosmetics and new clothes are far from uncommon. The desire to wear a short skirt and apply a thick layer of makeup to her face does not at all mean that the girl wants to attract attention to herself. Sometimes this is a sign that she has developed certain complexes and has lost self-confidence. The situation is aggravated if a teenage girl lags behind her peers in development. A friend’s second breast size compared to her zero is perceived as a real tragedy. Life seems gray and worthless.

If you don’t help the girl, if you let her continue to remain alone with her problems, eventually her complexes will multiply. This, in turn, can lead to the development of protracted depression, from which it is not possible to get out of it without the intervention of a psychologist.

How to help a girl overcome the difficulties of adolescence?

It’s difficult not only for teenagers, but also for their parents. Loving mothers and fathers often turn to specialists with the question of how long puberty lasts for girls. Unfortunately, neither psychologists nor doctors will be able to give them a specific date, since everything depends on the individual characteristics of the child. However, they can give parents some important recommendations that will help them cope with the difficulties of adolescence. For example, parents should:

Allow the girl to make independent decisions;

Forget about the directive style of communication;

Give the girl more freedom;

Do not do work for your daughter that she can do on her own;

Don't criticize the guy she's dating;

Do not violate her personal space;

Do not discuss your daughter with strangers.

If you have a daughter growing up in your family, remember that she will soon enter adolescence. It starts at ten or eleven years old. During this period, female hormones begin to be produced, the girl’s body is rebuilt and prepares for motherhood.

Changes in the girl's body

At eleven to twelve years of age, the thyroid gland begins to actively produce hormones, which cause rapid body growth, which is often disproportionate. A mature girl spends a lot of time in front of the mirror, studying the changes that are taking place, which do not always please her. There are mood swings and irritability. A surge of hormones leads to an excess of sexual energy, but the girl cannot realize it. As a result, it spills out in the form of aggression, insolence, and self-will. During adolescence, the function of the adrenal cortex is activated, and, consequently, the child is in a constant state of stress. This is important to know.

After eleven years, serious changes occur in the girl’s body - menstruation begins. Explain to your daughter in advance what it is, answer all her questions. Take care of good pads; some girls do not sleep well during this period because they are afraid of getting dirty.

During adolescence, girls often suffer from having an ugly nose, excess weight and acne. Parents need to take these features into account so as not to traumatize the child’s psyche. Constant comments can lead to depression. If this condition starts, you may need the help of a psychologist. During adolescence, hair on the body begins to actively grow - all this is the influence of hormones. In addition, there is increased sweating and oily skin. It is important to maintain hygiene and use appropriate cosmetics.

During adolescence, girls fall in love for the first time. A classmate, a singer, or an actor can become the object of feelings. This feeling is very important for a girl; she can abandon household chores, study, and become irritable, aggressive or withdrawn. You can’t make fun of the object of love or make fun of your daughter’s feelings. Be sensitive. The first trembling feelings can seriously hurt, resulting in an inferiority complex that will affect relationships in the future.

Any girl at this age feels like an individual. She identifies the main priorities in life, she develops taste. It is very important to maintain contact with her, not to allow her to withdraw into herself, to commit actions that she may later regret. It is during this period that girls are highly susceptible to the influence of the street and bad company. They may try smoking or drinking alcohol. All this is the influence of hormones. We need to help our daughter make the right and informed choice in life - in favor of health, education, family. Remember that adolescence passes, but its consequences largely depend on you. Puberty greatly influences the personality, its views, tastes.

How to help a teenager

Every teenager strives to be like their peers. Therefore, make sure that the girl dresses as is customary in her environment and has all the necessary accessories. This is important because poorly dressed children are subject to ridicule and humiliation. If your teeth, skin, or hair are far from ideal, do not ignore the problem. Stimulate your daughter's interest in dancing, music, and sports. It’s good if she attends clubs, sections, participates in school competitions and competitions.

If you have always had a trusting relationship with your daughter, there should not be any special problems. Otherwise, in adolescence, she is unlikely to begin to be frank with you. There should be moderation in everything: do not praise your child. Such girls are childish, touchy, and find it difficult in real life. Others will view this behavior negatively. But you shouldn’t shame a girl or humiliate her on every occasion. In this case, she will feel guilty and will not be able to stand up for herself. You need to choose a tactic so as not to traumatize the child’s psyche and at the same time maintain the authority of the parents. At this age, certain models and stereotypes of behavior should be instilled in your daughter, but this should be done carefully and unobtrusively.

Communication in transition

The girl copies the communication style of her parents. If you are rude, your daughter will do the same. If you avoid conflicts and try to stay on the sidelines, the girl will develop a corresponding stereotype.

The main topic among older girls is relationships with boys. It is very important to show understanding, to show your sincere desire to help, so that she does not hesitate to tell you the details. If she has a boy, monitor the situation, but don't go too far. Allow him to come to your home, find out more about his family. Gently and unobtrusively, you need to tell your daughter what she should do in a specific situation, tell examples from your life. The mother must warn the girl about existing threats - sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy, violence.

The problem of teenage sex is of no small importance. It is a mistake to think that children have sex only for love. More often this happens out of curiosity or a desire to defy prohibitions. Try to tell the girl all the subtleties and nuances, explain the need to protect herself. Invite her to read relevant literature or watch videos.

Personal care

The best decoration for a girl's face is clean, elastic and delicate skin. Follow a few simple rules: do not touch your face with dirty hands, avoid radical remedies, take care of your health, and wash off makeup at night. To nourish the skin, choose regular domestic ones; imported ones are best suited for newborn care products.

The problem of many girls is acne. You should not pay special attention to them, since the reason for their appearance is hormones. However, girls try to squeeze out blackheads every now and then. Therefore, your task is to teach her to do this in such a way that the harm is minimal.

Hygiene should be in everything. This also applies to hair. Long ones can be washed several times a week, short ones every other day. There is a large selection of shampoos for care. Help your daughter choose a hairstyle that suits her face. It is better to wait with coloring; explain to the girl how harmful the effects of various external factors are on the hair. Sometimes during adolescence, girls begin to lose a lot of hair. Be sure to visit a doctor and use folk remedies - they are very effective.

It is equally important to monitor the condition of the girl’s hands. The main rule is cleanliness and perfect nails. Buy your daughter a good manicure set and show her how to do a simple manicure. Convince her that at her age it is best to use clear nail polish in pastel shades.

Housework

This needs to be done starting from an early age. If you did everything yourself until the age of fourteen, do not expect much zeal from your daughter. In any case, the girl must understand the basic principles of putting the house in order: each thing must be in a certain place, and you must clean up after yourself.

A girl who doesn't know how to cook causes a negative attitude. This is, first of all, a reproach to the mother. Sooner or later she will have to do kitchen work. Therefore, from childhood, teach your daughter to cook simple food and wash dishes. Let her have her own dish.

Every teenage girl is interested in arts and crafts. Encourage such desires. It is the mother's responsibility to instill basic handicraft skills in her daughter. Knitting and sewing will allow you to get not only unique designer items, but will also teach you patience and attention. Small, repetitive movements have an anti-stress effect on the nervous system. As in any business, remember that it is best to demonstrate by example. If you sit down to watch a movie, start knitting and let your daughter embroider. Buy your young needlewoman a work basket where she will store her sewing supplies, knitting needles and hooks. All this will force the girl to return to the work she started. If she knows how to insert an elastic band, knit socks, hem a skirt, this is already the basis for independence. Let your daughter take part in product exhibitions. This arouses interest among peers and adults. They admire the girl’s talents and begin to treat her with respect. As a result, the child's self-esteem increases.

Every mother wants her daughter to live in harmony with herself. It is in our power to ensure that girls acquire skills and abilities that will help them move through life with ease.

In girls and boys it comes suddenly, and always earlier than you think. Today's children become teenagers at the age of 9 - 10 years. Along with all the peculiarities of adolescence, parents are faced with three global tasks:

• how not to lose control
• How not to ruin a relationship with a teenager.
• How can we survive in the next few years?

If you are the mother of a girl and your daughter is approaching this magical age, save this selection for yourself. Here is everything you need to know about the person your baby will soon turn into.

1. She wants you to hug her and hold her close like the little girl she was just a short time ago. Except for those moments when she doesn't want to. Don't even think about touching her if she doesn't want to!

2. For her, you are the most popular and cool person in the whole world. Seriously.

She can admire you, and five minutes later say that you need to see a plastic surgeon. But by lunchtime you're best friends again.

4 . She is smart and sarcastic. Even too much so that she doesn’t get punished for it from time to time.

5. She's really funny. And you are not funny. Never.

6 . She can rush through, slamming the doors, with the force of a tornado. But she again did not close the refrigerator door properly.

7. She will hate everything you bought for her in clothes. Yes, she liked that blue skirt. But she would never wear exactly the same one, but in green. If you forbid her to wear winter boots with thick soles and a sweater in July, you will hear that you do not understand anything.

8 . She uses all your lotion. And all the shampoo. And a scrub. And your precious bottle of oat proteins and shiitake mushroom extract.

9. She secretly (or not so secretly) tries to go to school with makeup on her eyes. Don't let her do this.

10. She can eat fruit fitness bars seven days a week for breakfast, lunch and dinner. It is useless to offer an alternative.

11. She believes that you can do anything. This is true.

12 . She believes that she can do anything. This is also true. But tomorrow she will seriously doubt that she is able to do anything. Your job is to remind her of the truth.

13. Pink is for little girls. She wants the walls in her room to be turquoise and the curtains to be lime green.

14. This week she wants to go to painting. The next she is passionate about karate. Don't worry, it's normal, she's trying to define who she is.

15. She needs personal space. If you don't know it, she will write "do not enter" on her door in pencil.

16 . The worst thing for her is if she has something different from other girls.

She recently discovered sarcasm. But, listening to her witticisms and barbs, be gentle with her and do not respond in kind. She might blurt out something like that, but she can’t defend herself yet.

18. She still needs her mom. But she will never admit it.

19 . She looks back at you for a hint on how to behave in this world as a woman. Please behave accordingly.

20 . She really needs your approval. She really wants to hear from you that she did great. Praise her.

21. Be prepared for her to roll her eyes if you start praising her. Don't let this fool you. Keep praising her.

22. She will ask you to take home every kitten, puppy, turtle, squirrel and bird that happens to be in your yard. But she would gladly give her little brother at auction to the highest bidder.

23 . She loves to spend the money you give her.

She is not you. She may look like you. She can do things exactly like you. She may have a voice like yours. But she is herself, her own person. Don't try to make yourself out of her.

25. She now reads really cool books - like Harry Potter or The Chronicles of Narnia. She now watches a movie in which there are no Smeshariki and minions. Take advantage of the moment and talk to her about cinema and literature. She has something to tell you.

26. There will still be landslides, breakdowns and atomic bomb explosions. Especially when she didn't get enough sleep.

27 . She is a charming mixture of awkwardness and elegance, poise and uncertainty.

28. But she is already beginning to compare herself with others. She will certainly find that she is missing something.

29. Tell her she's just a miracle.

30 . Every. God's. Day.

Based on materials from thenextfamily.com