Beautiful words on the birthday of a deceased friend. Funeral words
Page 2 of 2
21. There are no words to express all the pain and sorrow of our soul.
22. Eternal memory of you.
23. You are always in our memory.
24. I miss you so much for complete human happiness.
25. I feel empty on earth without you. 26. Thank you for living (living).
27. Great sorrow cannot be measured, tears of grief cannot be filled with tears. You are not with us, but you will live forever in our hearts.
28. We would give everything, a piece of our heart, If only yours would beat again.
29. The heart went out like lightning, the pain will not be extinguished by the year, Your image will forever be kept in our memory forever.
30. Everything was in him (her) - soul, talent and beauty, everything sparkled for us like a bright dream.
31. How much of ours went with you, how much of yours remains with us.
32. You left (left) life incomprehensibly early, Parents are oppressed by sadness and a wound is bleeding in their hearts, Your little son is growing up without knowing the word “mom” (“dad”).
33. You left (left) so early, without saying goodbye and without saying a word to us, How should we continue to live, making sure that you will never return to us.
34. Your mother’s tears, your father’s sadness, your brother’s loneliness, your grandparents’ grief will be eternal for you.
35. Like drops of dew on roses, there are tears on our cheeks, sleep peacefully, Darling, we all remember, love and mourn you. 36. The earth is empty without you.
37. Forgive us for bringing flowers to your stove under the starry sky. I'm sorry that we were left with air that you didn't breathe.
38. They don’t part with their loved ones, they just stop being close to them.
39. We cannot find words to describe our grief, We cannot find strength in the world to lift you up, Our words cannot even be contained in the sea, How cruel is the fate that took you away.
40. Unable to overcome grief, bear the pain of loss, No one could help you, forgive us (name), forgive us.
41. Having left a mark in the hearts of people with our good deeds, We do not say the word “no”, we say: “You are forever with us.”
42. Time stopped running and pain squeezed my whole soul, A man, of whom there are few in the world, passed away.
43. You left life, but not your heart.
44. How I want to scream in pain that you are no longer in the world!
45. I will never meet you, and I know it will always be like this.
46. The earth became poorer with one flower, the heavens became richer with one star.
47. Angel, dear, forgive me, it’s my fault that I wasn’t with you at the hour of death
48. The heart still doesn’t believe in the bitter loss, As if you didn’t die, but went somewhere.
49. When people forget you, all your friends forget, only your heart will remember you, and that heart will be me.
50. Unexpected grief, immense grief, the most important thing in life is Lost, it’s a pity that life cannot be repeated, To give it to you again.
52. We come here to lay flowers. It’s very difficult, dear, for us to live without you.
53. We wish you good luck in that unknown and new world, so that you don’t feel lonely, so that the angels don’t leave.
54. Bending over, we stand over your grave, watering the flowers with hot tears, I don’t want to believe, our beloved son (father), that you are in this grave.
55. Sleep well, our dear son (father)
56. You passed away too early, words cannot express our pain. Sleep, dear, you are our pain and wound, but the memory of you is always alive.
57. Love for you, dear son, will die only with us, And our pain and our sorrow cannot be expressed in words.
58. To you, the one and only, we bow our heads.
59. And earthly life ended, all your strength faded away, Farewell, our dear beloved, eternal memory to you.
60. Forgive us that we did not dare to give our love to you during our lifetime. You forgave us, left us, we remained eternal debtors.
61. You lived your life with dignity, leaving us with a memory forever. In a silent world, sleep peacefully, the person we love.
62. A serious illness broke you, you passed away without living, Dear, our beloved son, how difficult it is for us to live without you.
63. We are with you forever, son, God, calm his soul
64. I loved you very much, I always lived by you. Forgive me, my dear son, that I did not save you.
65. You were an example to follow for us. We still live by looking up to you. We come to you, father, on a date, to consult in happiness and misfortune.
66. Your whole life is over with you, you have no life, and we don’t. The dearest, beloved son, beloved child has passed away.
67. You are in us, dear, like our blood, And death has no power over you as long as there is love in the world!
68. Thank you, my clear one, for being in the world!
69. You left us, dear, the mournful hour of separation has come. But everything is still alive, you are in our heart among us.
70. Don’t make noise with the leaves, don’t wake up our mother.
71. You left life instantly, the pain remains with us forever, But we will never forget your beloved tender image.
72. We love you and you are always alive in our memory.
73. Don’t find out where I turned my path, to what limit in life I moved, oh, friend, I did everything on earth, I loved and lived on earth.
74. You, mother, gave us your warmth. We believe that your soul is calm and bright.
75. Let the fire not go out until the end and the memory of her remain, Who awakened hearts for life, and now has found eternal peace.
76. I loved you, I won’t forget you, I will love you forever
77. Quiet, trees, don’t make noise with the leaves, mommy is sleeping, don’t wake her.
78. Sometimes angels descend from heaven, To warm you with their warmth and love, You, our beloved girl, were such an angel.
79. Sleep peacefully, my beloved daughter, You have walked your short journey honestly and joyfully.
80. We love you very much, our daughter. Why did the night hide you so early?
81. You were a clear star, how dim the world became, When the star went out.
82. What words can I find so that you can hear the confession of my soul? And what string to play on, So that you can run, as before, on a date?
83. A rose fell, broken by the wind...
84. Lord, we give you our littlest angel.
85. How could we have thought that on this day you would step from childhood into eternity...
86. You passed away too early, words cannot express our pain. Sleep, dear, you are our pain and wound, but the memory of you is always alive.
87. To our little angel who has returned to heaven
88. You were like an angel soaring into the sky, how little time you spent with us..
89. Calm down, mom and dad! Gentle angels guard my sleep.
90. No, I will not come to terms with the terrible burden of existence until my death. That children die before adults, that you died, I remain.
91. You, baby, were cherished, raised, carried in their arms, taken to kindergarten. They sing to you now, bending over, and eating Farewell at the eternal cradle.
92. Wonderful child, unfair fate did not give you to me, but only showed you and immediately took you away.
93. Words cannot express all the grief and sadness, In our hearts and memories you (you) are with us
94. We are endlessly grateful to you, we do not forget about you, and we remember your souls and hearts alive.
95. No... They didn’t go away, but they repeated themselves in the children.
96. What a pity that we realized late how much we miss you
97. Life separated them, but death united them. Two pure souls are now in one grave.
98. Sleep well, my dear ones, I (we) will dedicate my life (we will) to your memory.
99. You will never be on earth again, But you gave us life, raised us, and left us here as your continuation.
100. Lord, thy will be done!
101. Rest in the Kingdom of Heaven.
102. Sleep in peace and pray to God for us
103. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.
104. Lord, with the saints rest the soul of your servant(s) (Name)
105. Give us strength to understand the Divine covenant - With God everyone is alive, but there are no dead.
106. How we (I) miss you, our (my) dear... And only prayer helps us (me) in sorrow.
107. Here rests in peace (Name), so that one day he will be resurrected in Christ
108. The Lord himself sent you to earth. He was your Shepherd and now He has called...
109. You have lived your life in merging with God - Now your path to Him is easy.
110. Don’t pass by, passer-by, stop, bow to my damp grave, pray for me, a sinner.
111. Life on earth is fleeting, but ahead is a heavenly paradise. We will remember you forever, so rise quickly
112. Help and save, protect and cover, Cover me with soft snow, look at me, Here I am all (all) before you, O Lord, give me peace.
113. Nature is wise and the eye of the Almighty sees our every step on the thorny road. There comes a moment when each of us, at the last line, remembers God.
114. The dust will return to the earth, which it was, and the spirit will return to God, who gave it.
115. God created the stars, the blue distance, but surpassed himself by creating sadness for loved ones.
116. Passer-by, pray over this grave, He found refuge in it from all earthly anxieties, Here he left everything that was sinful in him, With the hope that his Savior - God - lives.
117. Lord, he had sorrows and sorrows on earth, Give him joy in heaven.
118. Grant him, O God, remission of sins, Grant him eternal peace.
119. The kingdom of heaven and eternal peace to you.
120. God, forgive his (her) sinful soul and accept him as he (s) was
121. There is no need to cry for me, the soul is subject only to God. She set off on a journey through an unknown country. There is a kingdom of light, a kingdom of stars, There is a kingdom of world harmonies, so take your palms away from your eyes and smile, no tears needed.
122. How the heart cries, the pain cannot be conveyed. We mourn and remember every minute. Time cannot take away this pain. Oh God, help us get through the separation.
123. When the escape of life is torn out without pity, When the body turns to dust forever. Let them make a jug from this dust and fill it with wine: the man will come to life.
124. Life without You is empty. Where the dream lived, flowers die in tears. It's bitter to live without You. Not believing that You will never return to us.
125. Don’t part with your loved ones. Grow into them with all your heart. And every time you say goodbye forever when you leave for a moment.
126. And let the evening light candles for me. And your image is enveloped in smoke. But I don’t want to know that time heals. That everything goes with him.
127. Why and who needs it. Who sent you death with an unshaking hand. Only so mercilessly, so evil and unnecessary. Who let you into Eternal Peace.
128. Don't cry for me when I'm gone. After all, you will find a star in the sky. And my sorrow will leave you. After all, my star is so far away.
129. The pain of separation is incurable. The separation that is forever.
130. Eternal sleep for you, and eternal melancholy for us.
131. The farewell candle will burn out. And your eyes will fill with tears. It's hard to live in the world without you. And believe that you are not with us.
132. To those who are dear in life. Like those who remember and manage.
133. The heart is squeezing, the soul is crying bitterly, There is no important grief, no waste of your life.
134. Your dream will no longer pass, and your month will no longer meet, For the Lord will be your eternal light.
135. Without you, the earth is empty for us. How cruel fate is that it took you away.
136. How much of ours went with you. How much of yours remains with us.
137. We can’t bring you back with tears. Sadness cannot be measured by sadness.
138. It’s so easy to imagine you alive. That it is impossible to believe in your death.
139. Our last debt, a sorrowful stone, The cup of sorrow is full. There is no more joy in the world, Only pain and sorrow remain.
140. That day when your gaze went out and your heart stopped beating, For us it was the most terrible day, And we will not be able to come to terms with it.
141. There are no words in the world to describe our grief. There is no strength in the world to lift you up. Even the sea cannot contain our tears. How cruel fate is that it took you away.
142. You left kindness and love alive, No matter how many years have passed: We love, we remember, we mourn...
143. And he stands before my eyes. Alive, with a smile on his lips. No! No! He is always with us and will live in our hearts.
144. A person leaves the world. Like a guest from a friend's feast. He was tired of the chaos. I finished my glass and finished dinner. Tired. Enough. Rest is needed. It's time to go home.
145. You left life instantly, but the pain remained forever.
146. For the rest of our lives, we will have enough grief and sadness, About the one we loved and so suddenly lost.
147. We could not lose more, our grief has no boundaries. Grief cannot be expressed, cannot be described, there is very little granite page.
148. You believed your friends. I was deceived by love. But there is God above us. Punishment is coming. God's punishment is not a myth. What has passed will return. Those who took you away will be punished.
149. Grief, suffering, despair, the stormy waves of the sea of life are full. Their splashes are tears and blood. But to a man in the vale of languor, wonderful sisters are given as consolation. Faith Hope Love. And encouraging the weary in soul, Faith brings us firmness with it. She casts doubts. We look forward with bolder hope. The dark distance is both clearer and lighter. Full of wondrous joy. The third sister is God's breath, with her no suffering is scary. Her temple is our hearts. It contains compassion, pity, participation. It contains beauty, forgiveness, happiness. The kingdom of love without end...
150. Your hands did not know fatigue. Your lips never fainted. You walked through life loving your work. May you rest in peace.
151. I loved you, I loved life, but it’s not my fault that I didn’t live long. Now for you I will become the wind, a birch tree, a blade of grass, flowers. Pet them mom, it’s me, your pain is with you forever.
152. We only had a little more time to live in the Duma, and we might as well have lived. But the sun has set.
153. We stand bending over your grave. We water the flowers with hot tears, I don’t want to believe, dear and beloved, that you are in this grave.
154. It’s too early to see us. No one could save you. The wound on my heart is too deep. Sorry son, sorry, sorry...
155. You walked through life smiling. He left us all without saying goodbye. It’s impossible to describe how my heart cries. We mourn and remember
156. Pishov’s life is much too early. Nobody was able to lie. The wound is so deep in my heart. As long as you live with us.
157. With one flower the earth has become poorer. Heaven has become richer with one soul. You were with us so little in this life. But your memory is always in our hearts. 158. No! Don’t write in the dark, even if your heart skips a beat in agony. Having deprived you of a place to live for your squad, the children and children. 159. Do not bear grief. Don't cry a tear. You've taken your joy from home forever.
160. You loved everyone and sang songs. There is hope and support in the family. The world turned black. The light has dimmed and our grief is inconsolable.
161. Death chose you without asking us. How to live on and will you have enough strength? Our fell and husband, you were loved by us. We remember you and mourn you in grief.
162. We will remember You forever, for being cordial to everyone. For Your wisdom and kindness. For efficiency at the post. For sincere, smart advice. For the warmth that I was able to give. May God open heaven for you.
163. You passed away too early. Words cannot express our pain. Sleep dear, you are our pain and wound. The memory of you is always alive.
164. Oh, if only mommy were alive. We would give anything he asked for. Words... Words... Words... Words... We all pronounce them after death.
165. You lived and loved life. You should live and bloom. But the insidious death struck. Nobody could save you.
166. How the heart hurts, how the soul cries. The day has finally arrived.
167. I choke with tears... You are in my memory through me. It's so hard to bear the price of grief. I'm sorry baby, I'm sorry. What could they not save you?
168. The pain of loss cannot be washed away with tears, and sorrow has no end. Our dear, you will always be with us. In our thoughts, our hearts.
169. Sleep well, our dear one, in a dark house, in the distance. Let our sorrow and our tears not disturb your dreams.
170. Having deprived everything, happy days and death. Life has given you so few years. And instead of youth, love and hope, I gave this granite as a gift.
Those who love you...
They don’t part with their loved ones,
They just stop being around.
You sleep, and we live,
You wait and we will come...
You left us early, our beloved.
He took away our happiness and joy.
The Great Tribulation cannot be measured,
Tears won't help my grief.
You are not with us, but forever
You gave us life in this world,
In another you have found peace.
Gone, leaving a trace of sadness,
gusts of grief and melancholy.
Remember me, Lord,
Visit me with your salvation.
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
Remember me, God
And do not leave those who love you.
Like drops of dew on roses,
There are tears on my cheeks.
You are no longer here, but we don’t believe you.
You are in our hearts forever.
And my pain from that loss
We will never heal.
Love for you, dear son,
He will die only with us.
And our pain and our sorrow
Can't express it in words.
Our pain cannot be measured
And you can’t shed it in tears.
We treat you as if alive
We will love forever.
We love you, we are proud of you.
In our memory
You are always alive.
The Great Tribulation cannot be measured,
Tears won't help my grief.
You are not with us, but forever
You will not die in our hearts.
What a pity that your life
Was so short
But your memory will be eternal.
Sleep, my beloved daughter, peacefully.
You've gone your short way
Honest and joyful.
To your untimely grave
Our path will not be overgrown.
Your dear image, dear image
Will always lead us here
Nobody could save you
Died very early
But the bright image is your dear
We will always remember.
Words can't express it
Tears cannot cry out our grief.
You are always in our hearts. It’s so easy to imagine you alive
What's in your death
It's impossible to believe.
Quiet leaves, don't make noise,
Don't wake up my friend
The question of life is over.
There will be no more sorrow, no more tears.
Dear angel
Sorry, my fault
What was not at the hour of death
Next to you.
My heart went out like lightning,
Years will not dull the pain.
Your image will be treasured forever
Always in our memory. You lived your life with dignity,
Leaving a memory for us forever.
In a silent world, sleep peacefully,
The person we love.
You won't come back, you won't look back,
You will not become wise and gray-haired.
You will remain in our memory
Always alive and young.
Passing, stop
Pray for me, a sinner.
I was like you
You will be like me.
The ashes will return to the ground
Which is what he was.
And the spirit will return to God,
who gave it.
K.N. Batyushkov:
Epitaph
No inscriptions are needed for my stone,
Just say it here: he was and he is not!
A.S. Pushkin:
My epitaph
Pushkin is buried here; he is with a young muse,
With love and laziness spent a cheerful century,
He did not do good, but he was a soul,
By God, good man.
Epitaph for a baby. Book N.S. Volkonsky
In radiance and in joyful peace,
At the throne of the eternal creator,
With a smile he looks into earthly exile,
He blesses his mother and prays for his father.
M.Yu. Lermontov
Epitaph
Simple-hearted son of freedom,
He did not spare his life for his feelings;
And true features of nature
He often liked to copy.
He believed dark predictions
And talismans, and love,
And unnatural desires
He sacrificed his days.
And in it the soul kept a reserve
Bliss, torment and passion.
He died. Here is his grave.
It was not created for people.
Epitaph of Napoleon
Yes, no one blames your shadow,
Man of rock! You are with people who have doom over you;
He who knew how to lead you, only he could overthrow you:
Nothing changes great things.
V.S. Soloviev
Vladimir Soloviev
Lies in this place.
First there was a philosopher
And now he has become a skeleton.
Having been kind to others,
He was also an enemy to many;
But, loving madly,
He plunged into the ravine himself.
He lost his soul
Not to mention the body:
The devil took her
The dogs ate him.
Passerby! Learn from this example,
How destructive is love and how useful is faith.
I.A. Bunin
Inscription on the gravestone
There are no, Lord, sins and atrocities
Above Thy mercy!
Slave of the earth and vain desires
Forgive his sins for his sorrows.
I kept the covenant of love sacredly in my life:
In days of melancholy, in defiance of reason,
I did not harbor any enmity against my brother,
I have forgiven everything according to Your word.
I, who have known deathly silence
I, who have accepted the sorrows of darkness,
From the depths of the earth I preach the gospel to the earth
Verbs of Unsunset Beauty!
M.I. Tsvetaeva
Epitaph
To the one who lies here under the spring grass,
Forgive, Lord, evil thoughts and sin!
He was sick, exhausted, not from here,
He loved angels and children's laughter.
Didn’t crush the snow-white lilac stars,
Even though he wanted to overcome the Lord...
In all his sins he was a gentle child,
And therefore - God forgive him
loss of a loved one
Condolences on the occasion of death will show true empathy for the loss of a person who is experiencing great shock and needs moral support. Death is always around us, but we notice it only when it knocks on our house or the house of a truly loved one. Such a death takes you by surprise and no one is ever prepared for the fact that on that day they lost someone dear to them. As Bulgakov once noted in his immortal masterpiece, the problem is not that man is mortal. The main problem is that he is suddenly mortal.
Texts of condolences
- I mourn your loss. I know this is a hard blow for you
- We offer our sincere condolences to all family and friends
- I was told that your brother died. I'm very sorry, I mourn with you
- A wonderful man has passed away. I send my condolences to you and your entire family at this sad and difficult moment.
- This tragedy has hurt all of us. But of course, it affected you the most. My condolences
- I understand how difficult it is to lose a loved one. I'm really sorry. Perhaps I can help you with something now?
- Sincere condolences to family and friends. Big loss for us. Her memory will be in our hearts. We mourn together with our families.
- Please accept our sincere condolences. May God reward her in heaven for all the good she did. She is and will remain in our hearts...
- We offer you and your entire family our deepest condolences on your tragic death... We share your grief and offer you words of support and consolation. We pray for the deceased... With condolences,...
- Sincere condolences to the family and friends of the untimely departed... from our entire family. It is very bitter to lose your loved ones, family and friends, and doubly bitter if the young, beautiful and talented leave us. May God rest his soul.
- Everyone who knew him is grieving now, because such a tragedy cannot leave anyone indifferent. I understand how difficult it is for you right now. I will never be able to forget him and I assure you that I will support you in every possible way, should you contact me.
- We mourn with you the untimely passing of... Over the years of our friendship, we knew him as.... This is a great loss for everyone, we express our sincere condolences to the parents, all relatives and friends. May God bless his soul.
- They say they love their grandchildren even more than their children. And we felt this love of our grandmother (grandfather) to the fullest. Their love will warm us all our lives, and we, in turn, will pass on a piece of this warmth to our grandchildren and great-grandchildren - may the sun of love never fade...
- There is nothing worse and more painful than losing a child. It is impossible to find such words of support to ease your pain even a little. One can only imagine how difficult it is for you right now. Please accept our sincere condolences on the death of your dear daughter.
- Dear... I may not have known your father very well personally, but I know how much he meant in your life, because you so often spoke about his love of life, sense of humor, wisdom, care for you... I think that many people will miss him grab I pray to God for you and your family.
- There are no words to express how deeply we mourn the death... . She was a wonderful, kind woman. We cannot even imagine how much of a blow her passing was for you. We miss her endlessly and remember how she once... She was a model of tact and mercy. We are happy that she was in our lives. You can count on our help at any moment.
- I am truly sorry for the loss of your dad. I express my sincere sympathy to all of you and know this is a very sad and sad time for you. I know from my own life how deep the loss is when you realize that he will no longer be in your life. I can tell you, the only thing that can help you get over your loss is your memories. Your father lived a long and full life and achieved a lot in his life. He will always be remembered as a hardworking, intelligent and loving man. My thoughts and prayers will be with you all. May you find solace in your family and friends who share your loss. My deepest condolences.
Condolences in verse
When parents leave
The light in the window fades forever.
Father's house is empty and maybe
I dream much more often.
* * *
Sleep, my angel, peacefully and sweetly.
Eternity will take you into its arms.
You held yourself with dignity and steadfastness
Survived these hellish torments.
* * *
On this day full of heartache,
We sympathize with your misfortune,
Our life, unfortunately, is not eternal,
Every day we are getting closer to the line...
Our condolences... Strength of spirit
We wish you at this moment,
May the earth rest in peace to those close to you,
May the Almighty protect you from troubles.
When you left, the light went dark,
And time suddenly stopped.
And they wanted to live together forever...
Well, why did this all happen?!
* * *
Thank you, dear, for being in the world!
Thank you for loving me.
For all the years that we lived together.
I ask you not to forget me.
We remember, dear, and mourn,
The wind blows coldly on my heart.
We love you forever,
No one will replace you for us.
* * *
How we loved - only the Gods know.
Only we knew how we suffered.
After all, we went through all the hardships with you,
But we could not step over death...
What does true empathy look like?
Real support should not resemble standard ritual phrases that are said just for the sake of saying. These phrases will not play a decisive role for anyone who has just lost the most dear person on the entire planet. How to express condolences on a death? What rules should you follow so that your words of condolences regarding death are not perceived as words without meaning and content?
The first rule is: Don’t keep your feelings in your heart.
Did you come to the funeral? Come and describe what you feel now. Don't hold back your emotions and feelings. There is no need to be ashamed of what you feel. After all, it was not in vain that you came to this funeral and knew the person. Sometimes it is better to say a few kind words through tears and hug the relatives or loved ones of the deceased than to speak hundreds of words, playing the role of a great speaker. Warm words are what everyone is waiting for, from whom heaven has taken away a piece of their soul.
Second rule: Condolences about death are not just words.
Can't find the right words for this situation? Don't say too much. Sometimes it's better to just hug or touch the grieving person. Shake hands, cry next to you. Show that the person was not left alone in this grief. Show your grief as best you can. You shouldn’t do everything in a formulaic way and pretend that you’re very sorry if you’re not. A person will immediately understand where there will be falsehood and where there are true feelings and words. A simple handshake is a good chance to express condolences over a death for those who are not very close to the family of the deceased, but came to pay tribute by seeing the person off on his last journey.
Rule Three: Offer whatever help you can.
You shouldn’t limit yourself to just words of grief. Not only in word, but also in deed! This rule has always been relevant. You can offer your help to the family of the deceased. For example, a mother with children could lose their sole breadwinner, which means that all these people become victims of deteriorating financial conditions. It is not necessary to help with money. If you can help in another way, offer to help. Such a move will only confirm that you are helping not only with words, but also with deeds. Don't turn your condolences into dead sentences with your words. Back them up with action. Even banal help in organizing a funeral can become very valuable in the eyes of a grieving person who received a blow below the belt so unexpectedly. Do good deeds and they will be appreciated more than just words.
Fourth rule— Pray for the deceased along with people who have lost a loved one.
Sincere prayer can be seen from afar - that’s what all the priests and monks say. This is exactly what should be done in the case of condolences. After a few words, the grieving person should pray for the deceased along with the one who is now experiencing the loss. Prayer calms all believers and will bring at least a little harmony into the wounded heart of the grieving person. Prayer distracts even from the greatest grief. Ask God for consolation for those who are suffering severe torment and do not understand why fate took a loved one from them. The prayer will not take much time, but will leave a wonderful impression on those who are now standing in front of you in black clothes and calling on heaven for help and asking for a logical explanation.
Fifth rule - Remember everything positive that you know about the deceased.
In order to say real words of consolation, you need to remember all the best things that connect you with him. Did you play football together as a child? Come and tell me that you couldn't find a better teammate. Did he save your dog? Did you let me cheat in class or in university classes? Remember this too. Mentioning original moments from the life of the deceased will only make loved ones smile. If a smile does not appear on your face, it will be in your soul. The deceased could teach you a lot and bring you joy. Share your memories and in a few minutes you will do the impossible - give a spark of joy to those who are now grieving. Did you have a bad relationship with a person who left this world? Then you should understand that people close to him are not to blame for the small disagreements between you. Forget about all the problems that have happened so far, because when trouble knocks on the door, you should forget about everything.
Rule six: Don’t talk about how things will be easier in the future.
There is no point in telling parents who have lost their child that they still have a lot of time to create another small miracle. They should not give hope that time will subsequently heal all wounds, because it is at this moment that it seems to them that life will no longer be the same as always. This is precisely the greatest truth of life - everyone understands that life without a loved one will no longer be the same as before his death. Everyone who is now crying at a funeral has just lost their little piece of their soul. A woman who has lost her husband should not be told that she is a real goddess and will definitely not be on her own in this life. Condolences for the death of mom or dad should also not contain calls for future peace and consolation. Let the person grieve the loss and don't talk about future prospects. Any words about the future will be superfluous, since no one believes in it now and will not see the picture you paint.
Seventh rule: Don’t say that everything will pass. Don't say that you shouldn't cry and grieve.
Most people who say these things have never lost a loved one. Just yesterday a person kissed in bed and drank morning dark tea with his beloved, and in the evening she may no longer be in this world. Just yesterday children quarreled with their parents, but tomorrow they may not be there. Just yesterday there was a party with friends, and tomorrow one of them may be taken away by the sky. And the understanding that you can’t bring your loved one back is the worst thing that can happen in this life. Therefore, there is no need to say that crying will not help here. There is no need to say that you shouldn’t grieve and “destroy” yourself morally so much. There is no need to play the role of a psychologist and delve into the psychological state of a person in grief. The first person who says that there is no point in crying only proves that he does not understand the mourner. There is no way to bypass serious stress - just let a person cry who cannot understand why he has now lost the meaning of his life.
Eighth rule - Forget about empty words, among which the most popular phrase is “Everything will be fine”!
Don't make promises you can't keep. Do not talk about optimistic plans for a person, because he will not perceive it the way you want to present it. A person does not want to hear platitudes and excuses that are so formal that they have become traditional. It is better to help with deeds, rather than saying traditional phrases from films where the main characters are often buried.
Ninth rule - Don't be shy about your feelings!
You came to a funeral, not a holiday. Therefore, be prepared that you will want to hug the relatives of the deceased even when you do not know them at all. In grief, everyone is the same. Don’t be shy about feelings that can cover you in a big wave. Do you want a hug? Hug! Would you like a handshake or a touch on the shoulder? Do it! Did a tear roll down your cheek? Don't turn away. Swipe it away. May you be one of those who came to this funeral for a reason. You have come to a loved one who deserves this.
The main conclusion that can be drawn, taking these rules into account, is that you should avoid cliched words of condolences to the relatives of the deceased and actions that will not bring any benefit. Tactless phrases will not do any good. There are words that will only once again cause misunderstandings on the other side, not to mention possible aggression, insult or even disappointment. Perhaps you were a close person to the deceased, and now you are not behaving as his family expects. You must enter the state of shock in which the person is now. Put yourself in the place of the grieving person and then you will understand how to behave correctly. Do not forget that everything you say may not be perceived as it sounds in your mouth. The psychological burden on those who lose a loved one is incredibly large and this is the decisive moment.
What can you offer a grieving person at a funeral?
Ask how you can help. Perhaps the matter will not be in the material dimension at all, although money in this case is never superfluous. The family of the deceased may entrust you to go to the priest or simply agree on the purchase and transportation of the coffin. A small favor to the family, which is now in a difficult state, will not be superfluous. Indeed, at this moment, none of the deceased’s relatives can adequately assess the situation and their thoughts are not at all about the problematic aspects of organizing a funeral. Have you heard that even after a murder, friends of the deceased say that they must first bury him with honors, and only then look for the killer? The point is that the etiquette of expressing condolences is very interconnected with funerals. Do your best to make sure this funeral goes well, because every person deserves to pass away with the respect of others.
Offer your help in any way. Help will be received well in any case, and even if you are refused, they will still be pleased. Even ordering memorial cards for invitations to funerals or helping to accommodate guests from distant cities in your home would be a wonderful service. Just don’t talk about everything in such a tone as if you are offering just for the sake of simply offering. Offer specific help and receive real gratitude.
Be concise, like King Leonidas when he addresses the Spartans!
Words of condolences should be kept short. No one should speak for long because funerals are not the place for great speakers. Leave thousands of words to the priest who will perform the funeral service for the deceased. Keep it short and say exactly what you think. You should also not speak for a long time at a wake, since too heavy phrases cause distraction and lose their meaning. Don't be afraid to experiment in front of the mirror with a few phrases that you have prepared for yourself. Warm and sincere words are usually very short, like a declaration of love. Love needs no words, and the deceased is worth only a few sincere sentences. Do not forget that it is easy to feel false condolences, since at such times the relatives and friends of the deceased can boast of an increased sense of sincerity and falseness. Kind words can heal the soul and heart of those who are hurt or heartbroken.
What should those who had a conflict with the deceased do? How to behave and do the relatives and friends of the deceased need condolences from such a person?
Find the strength within yourself to forgive the one who was carried away by the sky. After all, death is the end point of all grievances. If you have done something wrong to the deceased, come and pay tribute. Ask for forgiveness in prayer, even if you are not sure you will receive it. Speak sincerely and the relatives of the deceased will accept it with honor. Leave negativity and unnecessary emotions at home. Do not forget that all grievances die with the person. Do you really regret your fault or just respect your competitor in some way? Come and show his loved ones that he was such a respected person that even his enemies came to honor his memory. Do you have a grudge against the deceased? Forgive and let go. Show this to his loved ones and they will be glad once again that you have forgiven.
Be original!
It's always better to come up with a few good phrases that are your own to say to the loved ones of the deceased. By coming up with these words, you can remember something from a person’s past. Perhaps you know something about him that others will not say. Perhaps you know something that your loved ones don’t know. Or perhaps your friend rarely told his parents that he loved them, but in fact always noted to his friends that he had the best parents in the world? Why don't you sympathize and remember this? Remember something interesting. Say something truly valuable to everyone.
What should you talk about during condolences?
Say that the person was not just good. Say that it is difficult to find words. Let everyone know that the deceased deserves more words than can be said now. Tell him he was talented. Good. Give examples that will confirm your words. Set him as an example to many present. Say you loved the deceased person. Let everyone know he will be missed. Say that this is a tragedy for you. Tell us about what you are grateful for to the deceased and what exactly he did for you. Tell those present that the role of the deceased in your life was great or, on the contrary, not so great, but despite this the world has lost one of the best representatives of humanity. Take breaks. Allow yourself to choose your words. Let everyone see that it is really difficult for you to pick them up. Tell the truth!
Will so-called religious condolences always be appropriate?
Religious rhetoric will not always be helpful, since the deceased could be an atheist or profess a different faith. You should not use phrases taken from the Bible in all cases, because this may not please many who come. Make sure you can afford it. Only in this case can you turn your words about the deceased into quotes from the Bible and supplement them with sincere sympathy. Moreover, the deceased could be an agnostic, like the people grieving behind him. In this case, you should also not speak in religious phrases.
Is someone who has lost a loved one really a believer? Then you can correctly select phrases from the church sphere, having first studied all religious epitaphs more deeply. They can push you onto the right path and thoughts. Just don’t forget that there shouldn’t be too much religiosity. In this case, measures are needed more than ever.
Despite this, religious themes in condolences will not always be a good option and it is not without reason that most people ignore them. It is better not to use biblical phrases, but to say in your own words what is in your soul right now.
Is it worth expressing condolences in the form of poetry?
Not at a funeral. Even if the mourner loves poetry, a funeral is far from the time to pay tribute to rhyme. Why so categorical? Funeral home experts know thousands of cases where such verses were too inappropriate, and there is one small reason for this. Poems of condolences regarding death are always perceived differently by people. 2 people can explain one line of verse in different ways. One phrase can have different meanings depending on the poetry of the person listening. This is exactly the case when poems of grief and condolences are extremely common and popular, and an obituary in poetic form poses a real risk of remaining misunderstood.
Is it worth writing an SMS with condolences?
Never write SMS in any form if we are talking about a service that gives you the opportunity to send a short message. Can't meet in person? It’s better to call yourself and don’t express sympathy in this way. After all, you don’t know at what exact moment this message may arrive, and its too short format makes the words too laconic. It will convey facts, not feelings. The person will not feel your voice. His timbre. Its emotional coloring. Moreover, messages in such cases are perceived poorly. Was it really difficult to call if you still found a minute to write a message? Perhaps you didn’t want to talk at all, but wrote a message just to forget about it once and for all and not feel guilty?
Let your condolences be sincere! These words are so necessary for those who have lost a loved one. They will be grateful to you!
It is impossible to prepare for death. Every person has experienced the loss of loved ones, family members, so many people are familiar with the pain of loss.
But often we do not know how to reassure and support the grieving person, how to express words of condolences in connection with the death of his loved ones.
note! It is imperative to offer condolences to a grieving person. This is a tribute.
But it is worth remembering that after the death of loved ones, people are in a stressful, shock state. Words of condolences regarding death are chosen carefully and carefully.
Examples of condolences on the occasion of death in your own words to the relatives of the deceased:
- “I was shocked by the event. It is difficult to accept and come to terms with.
- “Let me share with you the pain of loss.”
- “The news of his death was a terrible blow.”
- “I sympathize with your pain.”
- “We are sorry for your loss.”
- “My condolences.”
- “I was shocked by his death. I will pray for his soul."
- “The deceased meant a lot to us, it’s a pity that he left us.”
- “Grief cannot be expressed in words, but you can always count on our support in difficult times.”
- "We mourn with you."
Sometimes it is better to briefly express grief.
Short and sincere words of sympathy:
- "Hold on."
- “Be strong.”
- "I'm sorry".
- "My condolences".
- "Sorry".
- "It's a tough loss."
If the person grieving deeply believes in God, then the following words of sorrow are spoken:
- "The Kingdom of heaven".
- "Rest in peace".
- “Lord, rest with the Saints!”
- "May peace be upon his ashes."
- "Rest in the Kingdom of Heaven."
Table: rules for presenting words of condolences
What not to say
Everyone wants to support the bereaved. But there are a number of words and expressions that are not appropriate at a funeral. Expressions can cause anger, aggression, resentment.
What not to do:
- Comfort with the future. When your baby dies, don’t say “you’re still young, give birth again.” It's tactless.
It is difficult for parents to accept the loss of their own child, because they rejoiced at him and dreamed of the future.
The words “don’t worry, you’re young, you’re still getting married” sound “like saying goodbye to your beloved.” It's cruel. For people who have lost children, spouses, parents at the time of their funeral, there is no future.
They are not ready to think about it. Their pain at the time of loss is intense and painful.
- Look for the extreme. If there is a culprit in the death, do not remind about it. It is forbidden to say what would have happened if they had acted differently. It is not recommended to blame the deceased.
Examples: “it was his own fault, he drank a lot of alcohol,” “this is his punishment for his sins.” Do not defame the memory of the deceased, because it is not for nothing that they say that one should only speak well of the dead.
- Ask you to stop crying. The mourner must mourn the deceased and calm the soul.
Prohibited phrases:
- « Death has taken its toll, don't shed your tears" A person in a phase of acute shock does not completely understand what happened, that his loved one has passed away forever. Such words sound cruel.
- « Don't worry, everything will work out" - sounds like a fairy tale or a cruel mockery. The person is not ready to accept such a statement; he does not believe that the pain will go away and life will get better.
- « Time cures" Even time cannot heal mental wounds. The pain of loss will always be there. Any person who has experienced death will confirm this.
- « So he suffered, he feels good there" If the deceased was very ill, then words are unlikely to calm the mourner.
He has one desire - to see his loved one nearby, and not to think that he is happy in heaven.
- « Think about it, it’s even worse for others, at least you still have family" Don't use comparisons. Respect the person's pain.
- « I understand how much it hurts" is a common and tactless phrase. Understanding a mourner is difficult.
Never devalue a loss with the words “it’s good that you weren’t hurt”, “think about your children, parents”, etc.
For those who mourn, death is a shock to life. He is not ready to look for positive aspects in the loss of loved ones.
Important! It is worth remembering that condolences are offered from the heart. But this does not mean that you are allowed to say whatever comes to mind.
Grieving people do not perceive reality well, their subconscious is clouded with grief and resentment, so you should not provoke the person.
During the shock phase, one should not be interested in the details of the death of the deceased.
Condolences in writing
Don't condole:
- In verse.
- By SMS.
This is neglect. A funeral is not a place for poetry, and it is better to replace an SMS with a phone call. If you can’t call, you can express your condolences in writing.
Sample text:
- « We deeply mourn the death of the deceased. He was an amazing, kind and well-mannered person, surprising with his joy and spontaneity.
It’s difficult to write, my hand can’t hold a pen due to grief, but I still have to. We are sorry that this happened, but we are happy that fate brought us together with such an amazing person. Peace be upon him on earth and in heaven.”
- « The news of the loss struck my mind. I convey my condolences and express my deep respect to the deceased.”
- « It’s difficult to find words when a storm and the bitterness of loss are raging in your soul.. I can't believe this happened. Our condolences. We are praying for him."
Choose sensitive phrases that do not go beyond morality. The text should briefly acknowledge the loss and support the relatives of the deceased.
When writing a letter to relatives, describe the memories associated with it. When writing a text to a colleague, remember his business and personal qualities.
Useful video
- Related Posts
***
You will have to live with the pain of loss. There is no escape from this pain. You can't hide from it, you can't run away. Sooner or later it hits again and you want only one thing - deliverance.
***
THE DEATH of a loved one is the most terrible grief that can befall a person. The pain of loss sometimes seems unbearable.
***
Life and death are just two moments, only our pain is endless.
***
Ah, I... I regret... I'm Calling... I'm Crying!!!
***
Everyone died, what's the point of denying it now? But how can you understand this with your heart?
***
Take me, Lord, instead of him, and leave him on earth!
***
When you first face the loss of a loved one, then you understand the price of life and the inevitability of death.
***
Denial of death. Family members may act as if their loved one is not dead; waiting for him, talking to him.
***
No matter how sad it sounds, our lives are short and sooner or later we will all fade into oblivion.
***
The feeling of loss gives rise to torment similar to the torment of a person thrown overboard a ship...
***
Take care of those you love!!! Appreciate the minutes spent together! Know how to forgive! So that later there will be no excruciating pain for unspoken words, for unperformed actions!
***
Probably, if you truly love a loved one, you will never come to terms with their loss.
***
There was a poem carved on the stone wall of the temple called “Loss”, it only has three words and it has only three words. But the poet scraped them off. Loss cannot be read… it can only be felt.
***
People do not regret what was or is. People regret lost opportunities.
***
The loss of a loved one shatters our familiar world.
***
Time may heal, but they don’t live long enough to forget someone who was dear to them.
***
Death passes through the Earth, separating loved ones so that later they can unite in eternity.
***
Friends always live in each other's hearts, even after one dies, he will remain in the heart of the other forever.
***
You left so suddenly... It’s unthinkable that your life was interrupted like that, all we were left with were tears and the truth: Remember and pray all the time.
***
There is no life on earth where there is no child. Why do I live on earth if children are dying?
***
It is impossible to return, it is impossible to forget... Time is inexorable!!! Half a year has already passed. Life flows by... Realization has not come!!!
***
Giving up your love is the most terrible betrayal, an eternal loss that cannot be compensated either in time or in eternity.
***
We mourn for Lokomotiv, we feel sorry for the guys, but we were waiting for them in Minsk... Life is very unpredictable...
***
The most important man in my life is you, daddy, and no matter how old I get, I will always remain daddy’s little daughter for you, and you are my main man, no one can replace you. May you rest in peace.
***
As soon as we lose faith in our strength, we lose ourselves. Statuses about the bitterness and pain of losing a loved one
***
It is very painful and scary to lose loved ones, relatives, loved ones, but with each loss the feelings become dull and the heart becomes colder...
***
We must pray for those who have gone into the dream world of silent silence. So that tears do not flow from heaven, for us... for sinners... they.
***
They say that time heals... It seems to me that it simply tears out pieces of our memory, with blood...
***
It hurts to look into your eyes and realize that you can’t help... It hurts to be close and know that this is the last night... When the doctor declares death... The pain from the loss of those closest to you is unbearable! ... There is no replacement for them!!!
***
Damn... it’s so scary... you see a person, say hello to him... and a couple of days later they call you and say that he’s no longer there... Scary...
***
When a loved one dies, you feel like you have lost a part of yourself.
***
Don't try to avoid painful experiences. Don't hold back your tears. What happened is a real tragedy. It must be felt, experienced.
***
The memory of the deceased can become an incentive for further life.
***
Only when we lose do we begin to appreciate... only when we are late do we learn to hurry... Only by not loving can we let go... Only by seeing death do we learn to live...
***
Somehow I came to terms with fate... there were two of us... and you were alone there. We stocked up on a pound of salt with you... now my son and I eat it...
***
Life is too short to have time to understand its meaning, death comes too quickly without having time to understand that there is only one life given.
***
This status is for all those who once foolishly lost their soulmate and, because of pride, missed the moment when they could get them back.
***
How to relieve the pain when a loved one leaves where there is no way back???
***
Do you know why people look at the sky when it hurts them? So they try to hold back their tears...
***
It's sad when people die!!! It’s even worse when the scum that killed them is still alive!!!
***
Talk about the past in the past tense.
***
I have a lot to do today: I need to completely kill my memory, I need my soul to petrify, I need to learn to live again.
Anna Akhmatova.
***
And I burned everything that I worshiped, I worshiped everything that I burned.
***
How often, for the sake of fidelity, you are tormented by loneliness, your love is not needed by the dead, your love is needed by the living.
***
Loss of illusions - is it a profit or a loss?
***
The worst thing is to lose what you believed in, hoped for, and then bam! and a black hole formed inside.
***
The person cannot accept the loss. He experiences shock, which manifests itself in a complete lack of feelings.
***
It’s just... periodically... it happens... your messages and voice are not enough... I ask... don’t forget me... gradually turning into the past...
***
What heart can bear it??? All the pain and sorrow cannot be expressed in words. No one can love like a mother. How painful it is to lose your mommy.
***
Departed feelings can still return, but a departed loved one never does.
***
When one person dies, it is a sad loss, but the death of millions of souls is a statistic.
***
A person can come to terms with the thought of his own death, but not with the absence of those he loves.
***
The highest wisdom is in accepting death. It is important to understand that life does not end. We are all immortal. Our death is a tragedy only for our loved ones. - Mikhail Mikhailovich Prishvin
***
You left the pain in my heart forever! Gone from this life forever! Dear, sweet and gentle, my beloved mother!
***
I can’t live without you... My heart cries and my soul groans... I, too, my dear, have “GONE” from life.
***
I recognize you... in the touch of a birch branch, I recognize you... in the river with seething water, I recognize you... in the dew that looks like tears, I know darling!!! you're near me.
***
You may be 14, 20, 30, 42, 50... You will still cry when dear people leave.
***
Getting attached to a person is a huge risk; when they leave, they take your soul with them.
***
Those who have known the sadness of loss appreciate the joy of what is found.
***
I love and remember. We remember those who left us, We remember those who closed their beloved eyes forever.
***
Getting out of depression gradually becomes possible, mental pain becomes less. A person begins to look for ways to solve psychological problems that are not related to loss.
***
Nobody dies too early, everyone dies on time.
Statuses about the bitterness and pain of losing a loved one
