What to do and how to behave if your husband stops loving you: advice from an experienced family psychologist. Psychologist's advice: What to do if your husband stops loving you

If you have come to this page, read it to the end; there are always many pitfalls in personal relationships.

Have you realized that next to your loved one you feel lonely, alien and unwanted? This is a reason to think that something has gone wrong in your relationship. If he has lost interest in you, lives his own life, is interested in what happens to you extremely rarely and only “for show,” then most likely he is now the one who was there before.

How to behave in such a situation, how to survive a difficult time with the least emotional loss, we figured out by Alexandra Dudkina And psychologist, Gestalt therapist Tatyana Gavrilyak.

Symptoms of “dislike” It is important to understand that we are not talking about some kind of cyclical decline in relationships. All couples go through periods of crisis when passions subside and you are not so attracted to each other. If you notice something wrong, don’t immediately think that this is the end. Give both yourself and him time to see what happens next. However, if you are already thinking about what to do if your husband has fallen out of love and the cold has dragged on, if you see that on his part there is not the slightest attempt to save your couple, then this is a reason to think about whether this couple exists at all?

“The concept of “falling out of love”- very relative. It may seem like there is no love anymore. But in fact, there is simply a large number of accumulated negative feelings, under which love is no longer felt,” the psychologist comments.

There are a number of signals that will tell you about problems in your relationship. By paying attention to them in time, you get a chance to fix everything. So:

1. A man does not treat you with the same reverence that he used to have. Almost never hugs or kisses. When you yourself reach out to him, he turns away;

2. Does not attach importance to sharing meals. It would seem that this is such a small thing. However, eating together brings people very close. And ignoring such an important element of a strong relationship speaks of his subconscious reluctance to be near you;

3. Refuses to discuss his problems at work, troubles that have arisen in relationships with friends. He doesn't let you into his personal space;

4. He finds fault with you with or without reason, believes that you do everything with a C grade. At the same time, your efforts and successes go unnoticed;

5. Never calls you first and never calls you back when he sees a missed call. It is possible, of course, that he has a very stressful job without a single free minute, but the one who truly loves you will definitely find time to call back and ask if everything is okay;

6. Does not show initiative in intimacy, and reacts to your attempts to have sex as if doomed;

7. Increasingly uses the pronouns “I, my” instead of “we, ours.” It feels like he lives separately from you. This behavior looks like nothing more than neglect of your relationship;

8. He is of little interest in how your working day went, how you feel (even if just yesterday you were sneezing and coughing). And this is in contrast to how caring he was just a couple of months ago.

In each specific case, there may be different reasons why the husband fell out of love. Explaining the general reasons why men move away from the women they love, the psychologist says that it is primarily a matter of insufficient emotional intimacy: “More often, misunderstanding in the family arises due to the inability of people to sincerely talk about problems, express experiences, receive feedback, etc. In this case, the man and woman cannot correct what they do not like in the relationship. Problems grow like a snowball, although everything could have been solved long before the idea of ​​past love appears.”

How to react to cooling

If you realize that he has really cooled off, it’s worth figuring out what to do, how to return his feelings and whether to return them at all.

It seems obvious to many to call the man for a frank conversation and find out what went wrong. However, conversation differs from conversation, Tatyana Gavrilyak says:“The result directly depends on how this conversation is conducted. If we speak from the position of claims and dissatisfaction, of course, the man will not make contact, but if you try to honestly and calmly voice your feelings about what is happening, then perhaps it will lead to a solution to the problem.”

Most often, it is quite difficult for men to talk about their feelings; they do not like to sort things out, and therefore are ready to remain silent until the last moment, until the situation becomes stalemate. And if a man does not know how to take responsibility for what is happening to him and his family, then you should not wait for the first step from him. Before it’s too late, start a conversation yourself, find out what doesn’t suit him, what he would like, how he sees the future of your couple. By his intonation, willingness to discuss the problem, and even by whether he looks you in the eyes when answering, you can understand whether there is a chance to save the relationship.

If you see your man’s willingness to engage in dialogue, jointly solve the problem that has arisen and do everything so as not to destroy the family, then all is not lost. You can try to get out of a difficult situation on your own by listening to your loved one, taking into account what does not suit him, and also sharing your experiences. If nothing changes due to independent actions, Tatyana Gavrilyak advises contacting a specialist.

However, when the conversation feels like a one-sided game and you feel like you’re straining your vocal cords in vain, then most likely your man is not ready to help you maintain the relationship. Their further continuation will also look like a meaningless conversation. Maybe we should let him go.

Don’t want to let go, even knowing that he cheated on you? You will have to find the strength within yourself and forgive. “But you need to truly forgive so as not to remember the betrayal. And this is difficult and long work - such forgiveness,” adds Tatiana Gavrilyak.

What to do if he said he doesn't love you

It’s easy to get confused and not know what to do if your husband has fallen out of love, when it’s just guesswork. But in a situation where a man himself says that he doesn’t love you anymore, everything is much more complicated. As we said, representatives of the stronger sex show weakness in matters of ending relationships that have already become obsolete. Part of the point is that a sense of duty means a lot to men, and most of them will prefer to stay with you, even if they have an affair. But if you heard: “Let’s break up, I don’t love you anymore,” you should let him go.

It is important to understand that you will never become happy if your hands are not busy creating your own happiness, but trying to keep the man who is leaving. Clutching tightly to his back, you will feel unnecessary. Therefore, it is worth finding the strength within yourself and freeing your thoughts from the person for whom you have ceased to mean something.

For what reasons do women not let go of those who do not love them and continue to live with them under the same roof? Most often it is a matter of common children, fear of loneliness and excessive merging with a partner. “There is nothing good in such relationships either. If one cannot imagine himself without the other and is dependent on him, then this is an unhealthy relationship. And it’s one thing to destroy a relationship based on love, but quite another to destroy a relationship based on addiction. But saving a family for the sake of children is absolute absurdity. In this way, women only justify their fear of loneliness. There can be no benefit for children from maintaining the appearance of a family. Happy parents are much more valuable to children, regardless of whether they are together or not,”—

My husband and I have been married for 12 years. We got married when we were 20 years old, and soon had a son. During the first years, my husband was in the midst of his youth, he drank, spent time with friends, did not value his family, I was worried, then I got used to it, dissolved in my son, and the thought of divorce came to me more than once. My feelings for him cooled down and it became easier, I fell in love with myself, time passed and he looked at me with different eyes. He began to be jealous of me, began to feel his attention, and began to show love. He changed after 6-7 years of marriage, I took a closer look at him, and realized that it was not in vain that I saved my family in due time, that this is the person I want to live with, whom I love. As for sex, in this regard I was always desirable to him, throughout all these years he was the initiator in sex, I was cold towards him in this regard, although I felt that I loved him, I thought that there was something wrong with me physically. But she made no attempts to correct the situation. Very often my coldness became the cause of our scandals, misunderstandings, and insults. Over time, he got used to me like this, and this question was no longer as pressing as before, but sometimes it still arose. At the moment, in the 12th year of married life (my husband is 33 years old), we are expecting our second child - a girl, as we both wanted. This child is welcome. I felt that my husband began to distance himself from me somewhere in the 4-5th month of pregnancy. He began to focus on himself, on his health, nutrition, on how he looked, began to play sports intensively, and began to rapidly climb the career ladder. Started to look great. In general, he lived his own life. I began to suspect him and be jealous. In addition, he changed his password on social media. network, I password-protected my mobile phone, although we had never hidden anything from each other before. I see that he is hiding something from me, he has become a stranger. She called me for a frank conversation many times. I made contact, the conversations were very difficult emotionally. He says that he himself doesn’t know what’s happening to him, when I ask him whether he loves me or not, he says “I don’t know,” “I don’t know anything,” “don’t worry, I’ll never leave you.” In response to my questions about the fact that someone might have appeared with him, he either remains silent or brushes it off. This has been going on for 4 months now, and I am due to give birth in about three weeks. I think that if it weren’t for my pregnancy, he would have left. He says: “You are now in a vulnerable position, and I am selfish and think only about myself.” He also does not have a good relationship with his son, but he says that he is really looking forward to our daughter. Returning to the question about our sex life, I must add that after the first frank conversation, I made every possible attempt to change, took the initiative in sex, became more attentive to him, in general, I began to almost look into his mouth. Our first frank conversation seemed to turn the world upside down for me. I realized that I didn’t want to lose him, that I wanted to save my family at all costs, to return his love. And these metamorphoses happened to me almost on the same day. I have changed dramatically. At first he didn’t believe in my changes, he thought that it wouldn’t last long. Four months have passed, I’m still fixated on him, I don’t notice anything around me, constant mood changes. And now he says that it would be better if I didn’t change, everything turned upside down in his head, he admitted that he does not feel sexual attraction to me, attributing everything to my drastic changes. But I can't understand it..why? He always expected initiative and passion from me, but here, on you please, passion flared up in me with its former strength, but he no longer needs it. He says “return everything as it was and don’t pay attention to me.” Easy to say, but difficult to do. He also asked to let him go, he wants to live alone, to sort himself out. I said I wouldn't keep him. But he cannot decide to do this, most likely due to the fact that his loved ones may find out and condemn him. In general, I am inclined to think that the point is that he finally found love. I don’t know what to do, it’s very difficult mentally, I can’t think about my baby, all my thoughts are only about this dead-end situation. Is it possible to bring passion and love back into a relationship? Or is it all over? The problem is that I don’t want it the way it was before. Are we really going to love each other one by one, or is the whole circle closed?

In any family, even the happiest and strongest, there are difficult moments, temporary separations, and sometimes complete breakdowns in relationships. When this happens to someone you know, it seems that a similar situation cannot happen again in your case. In fact, no one is immune from this.

Do you suddenly begin to realize that you have become unloved, unnecessary and lonely next to a once passionately loving person? The question begins to worry you: what to do if your husband stops loving you? Alas, there is no universal recipe for getting out of a situation where a husband has stopped loving his wife.

We can only suggest how to survive this difficult stage of life with dignity and with minimal consequences for yourself. Today in our article - how to understand that your husband’s feelings for you have really changed and how to act correctly in this difficult everyday situation.

Is it a real problem or a fictitious one – how can you tell?

Often, many women begin to perceive banal fatigue at work or simply a bad mood on the part of their other half as a loss of interest in her. First of all, you should not make hasty conclusions. An alarming signal can only be systematic manifestations of your husband’s coldness towards you.

How can you tell if something is really going on with your husband or if he’s just not in the mood? You can determine that your fears and suspicions are justified using the following signs that your husband has fallen out of love:

  • He stopped hugging, kissing you and giving you flowers, although just yesterday he did not miss any suitable moment to show his feelings. When you try to kiss him yourself, he turns away and avoids in every possible way.
  • You rarely have the opportunity to have dinner together when you can talk calmly in a favorable home environment.
  • He stopped discussing problems or troubles at work with you and does not let you into his personal space, preferring to spend all his free time with friends.
  • He tries to reprimand you for any reason, sometimes finds fault with you even for no particular reason, and ignores all your successes and any efforts.
  • He stopped calling you back during the day and asking about your affairs, health and the situation at home.
  • In response to all your attempts to get closer, he shows a certain doom, and he himself has completely stopped taking the initiative regarding intimacy.
  • Rarely uses the pronouns “our”, “we”, and more often you can hear “I” or “mine” from him.

In each specific family, all these signals may differ and manifest themselves in different ways. How to understand that your husband has fallen out of love can sometimes be very difficult. I am glad that in many cases, if symptoms of cooling of relations between spouses are identified in a timely manner, one can still try to save the family, and sometimes successfully.

Let's keep calm and pull ourselves together

If you are convinced that your husband has stopped loving you, and you do not have a single drop of doubt about it, depression and scandals will in no way benefit your relationship.

Moreover, if your husband starts, and you begin to show aggression towards him, then quarrels and tears can only aggravate the situation and lead to complete collapse.

Given this development of events, the most correct thing to do would be to stop living in illusions, feeling sorry for yourself and being angry with your other half. We must try to understand why this happened and what caused the problems.

We find out why the husband fell out of love

You should not give up prematurely. Perhaps your husband still loves you and has just begun to lose interest in you, or there are some other reasons for his cold behavior in the family. At this stage, it is very important to analyze the situation: understand what the essence and reason are and try to correct or eradicate it.

The situation when a husband stops loving his wife is far from new and has already been thoroughly studied by family psychologists. It is possible that a visit to such a specialist will help you deal with all the problems that have arisen.

Yes, it is not customary for us to visit such doctors. They are not available everywhere, and their sessions are quite expensive. What to do if it is not possible to visit a specialist? You can independently assume some reasons:

  • Revenge for your mistakes. Perhaps you allowed yourself to joke about your husband’s mistakes or failures in the family circle or in front of his friends or colleagues, and now the time has come for you to pay for it. In this way, he is trying to settle scores with you and hurt you, considering that family relationships are the most painful place for you.
  • Another woman. The situation when a husband cheats is perhaps the most common. It is the appearance of a rival that may cause a cooling of feelings towards you. It should be taken into account that the likelihood of a man becoming infatuated with another woman is practically reduced to zero if he has a loving and well-groomed soulmate waiting for him at home, who always understands him, supports him and surrounds him with care.
  • Lack of interest. Your spouse could simply have lost interest in you, you have ceased to be a secret and a riddle for him, you have become too predictable, boring and monotonous. You no longer arrange any surprises, do not perform actions that would help him see you in a new light.
  • Infatuation instead of love. This situation, when, in fact, there was no love, is considered the most difficult. It often happens that temporary love and outbursts of passion are mistaken for true feelings, and emotions, as we know, cannot last long. This is the hardest reason for a woman to find out, since she doesn’t want to believe that the marriage took place without true love.

These are the most common versions of why the husband fell out of love, but there are many more of them. If a woman is determined to preserve her husband’s love, she should try and analyze both her behavior and the life of her beloved man recently and compare them with the best months of married life.

Return to your previous relationship or stop loving your husband yourself

Many women are faced with the question: how to get their husband back if he has fallen out of love? In some cases, you can try to mend old relationships. To do this, you need to show a little patience and make efforts and, perhaps, they will not be in vain.

Do you want to return your loved one, or rather his love? The algorithm of your actions in this situation will look like this:

  1. Give all your free time to your husband. You may even have to sacrifice the time that you usually spend communicating with your children. Let's hope it's justified.
  2. Take an interest in his affairs at work, but it really should be a keen interest. A smart man will immediately guess that his wife has some thoughts on her mind.
  3. Engage him with interesting stories or fresh jokes and talk as much as possible. This advice only works if your spouse is sociable and does not get annoyed by long conversations.
  4. Organize a trip: it doesn’t matter where, the main thing is to get away from everyday life. Even a short vacation or a change of scenery can revive old feelings.
  5. Try to love everything that your husband likes to do in his free time. A shared hobby always brings people together.
  6. Try changing your look: hairstyle, makeup, or buy a new outfit. Make your husband jealous - it also works well!
  7. Try to always be in a good mood and radiate positive emotions. Find interesting recipes and please your spouse with delicious food. All men, like little children, love to eat tasty and sweet food.

The advice is good and should be followed not only when difficult times come in the family. It’s hard to even imagine a man who wouldn’t like his wife – a beauty, a smart woman, a housewife and just a friend.

What to do if the husband stopped loving his wife and left?

There are also situations when the spouse does not leave his other half any chance and simply leaves home. Here everything is much more complicated and perhaps you should give your spouse the opportunity to be alone, to sort out their feelings and desires. This is the most reasonable course of action and, perhaps, he will soon return on his own, and your relationship will reach a whole new level.

If this does not happen, all your attempts to talk and understand the situation were unsuccessful, perhaps the person needs to be released. But what should you do, an abandoned and still loving wife? You should be able to survive this condition, take advantage of the help and support of loved ones and children.

Try to stop loving the person who betrayed you, and perhaps fall in love again. New love will be the best cure for the family troubles you have experienced! Be happy!

Life is unpredictable. When everything is fine in family and professional life, like a bolt from the blue, problems can strike, including divorce or dismissal. In family life, everything cannot always be smooth; spouses cannot always be at the peak of romantic relationships and passion for each other. There is often a decrease in desire, loss of romance and feelings. If your husband has fallen out of love, we will look at the signs of what to do in this case below.

How to understand feelings - has he really fallen out of love?

After a certain period of family life, most spouses experience a cooling of feelings. These feelings do not necessarily remain withered for life now; often this is a temporary phenomenon. However, it also happens that you have to come to terms with the end of a relationship. When such a situation arises, a woman most often asks herself the question: “If my husband stops loving me, what should I do?” In the case where such circumstances arise, you should first decide: is this a fictitious problem or a reality?

Reasons for temporary cooling of men

As a rule, cooling in men occurs as a result of the behavior of their wife. If your husband stops loving you, what should you do? We need to understand the reasons for what happened. For example, after giving birth, a wife stops taking care of herself, walks around in a worn-out dressing gown, and after the birth of a child, she begins to pay more attention to the baby than to her husband. The spouses have different interests, and they communicate little. The desire to have a close relationship also decreases when the husband and wife are disturbed and, as a result, quarrels arise.

It is very good if the spouse consults with a psychologist who can competently explain how to behave correctly when the husband has fallen out of love, what to do, and give advice on how to get out of a family crisis.

The main “symptoms” of a husband’s loss of love for his wife

Determining the “symptoms” of cooling is not so difficult, here are typical ones:

  • The husband avoids kisses and hides his gaze, although not long ago he gave flowers and attention.
  • The spouse skips family dinners, although this was previously unacceptable.
  • He no longer shares his problems with his wife, as if access to his personal space is closed, and prefers time spent with friends to marital communication.
  • He nitpicks over little things.
  • Doesn't call during the day, doesn't ask about health, what's going on at home, and the like.
  • The relationship looks doomed in his eyes; he ignores his wife’s attempts to get closer.
  • “Our”, “we” no longer sounds from his lips, but the pronouns “I”, “mine” - on the contrary, have become the norm.

Answering the question of what to do if your husband has fallen out of love, the psychologist’s advice is ambiguous, but there is one main line of behavior - calmness, only calmness!

Ways to develop the situation in the family

Having a warm heart and a cold mind, a wise woman will be able to go through all the difficult moments of married life without great losses. Having learned what to do if her husband has fallen out of love, and having comprehended the advice of a psychologist, a wise wife will come to the conclusion that depression and scandals with clarification of relationships will not bring any benefit! The husband will only become even more irritated and, most likely, will try to quickly hide. You shouldn’t count on pity either - this is not a feeling that affects the strength of a marriage.

Active actions of the wife

After the woman calms down, it is necessary to analyze the situation and establish a cause-and-effect relationship. This will help eliminate the cause and, most likely, restore the relationship. In order to understand what to do if a husband stops loving his wife, you need to listen to the advice of a specialist. And it’s not enough to just listen to them, you need to want to change your life and do something for it.

Visits to such specialists are not very widespread in our country, but you should not neglect visiting a knowledgeable professional. To improve relationships, you should also not forget about your appearance. Almost the first active action of the wife, of course, should be a trip to the beauty salon: pedicure, manicure, hairstyle, advice on self-care. After this, you definitely need to buy something new - it significantly improves your mood.

A woman should try as much as possible to understand the reason for her husband’s distance. It can be:

  • falling in love with another;
  • revenge for insults or barbs;
  • the spouse has become a studied book;
  • Infatuation has passed, not love.

Return of the relationship

When the husband said that he had fallen out of love, what should the wife do if reality is against her? Whatever happens, thoughts should only be positive! There's enough negativity as it is. After self-calming, the second main element is patience.

  1. Try to devote free time to your husband.
  2. Cultivate within yourself a keen interest in your spouse’s hobbies and work.
  3. Try to remain cheerful, tell funny stories, share your thoughts and events.
  4. Remember the golden mean! Everything should be in moderation; there is no need to attack your husband with your anecdotes and questions.
  5. Organize a joint trip, an excursion, the main thing is impressions!
  6. Try to find a joint hobby.
  7. You can give your husband a little reason for jealousy, just don’t overdo it!
  8. Please your spouse with new delicious dishes unobtrusively and unexpectedly.
  9. But remember: no imposition of yourself or anything else! Everything should be calm, with careful actions.
  10. Be a fox - in the good sense of the word.
  11. Thank your husband, praise him, say kind words and that you really need him (just without blackmail!).
  12. Love yourself! Your husband will love you again, the main thing for him is to understand that you are dear, smart and beautiful, a warm and affectionate wife who loves her family and him, her husband, first of all.

Proper separation

Of course, it happens that no actions on the part of the wife help, and the husband made the final decision - to leave. Then you need to make sure that everything has been done to save the family, and, placing responsibility on him, let him go. If your husband stops loving you, what should you do? You can’t hold him against his will, but you can give him the opportunity to figure it out, to be alone with himself, even to try a new family life. In most cases, men repent.

If repentance never overtook him, then why love someone to whom you mean nothing? Happiness is the work of man, and life is very short. Live and breathe deeply, it means yours is yet to come!

If it is impossible to save the family, especially if there are children in it, you should not have a negative attitude towards the children and thus take revenge on your husband. On the contrary, remain friendly, wish your husband happiness, and explain to your child that this is life and, unfortunately, not everything in it happens according to our ideas. If your husband stops loving you, what should you do? In this case, remember this truth: what is good for one case is not suitable for another! Therefore, in no case should you “show off the heat” - everything needs to be weighed and, with a cautious approach, try to restore the relationship.

Unfortunately, not all families in Russia and neighboring countries can boast of long-term happy family relationships. Many women, having been married for ten to fifteen, and sometimes only a few years, one day notice that their husband has stopped loving them. He stopped giving compliments, giving gifts, communicating with his wife, discussing his affairs with her and listening to her stories...

It was as if he had closed himself off, building a thick and high wall between himself and his chosen one. Sound familiar? But you shouldn’t be upset, because this problem is completely solvable! Today we will talk about what you can do if your husband stops loving you.

How to save a marriage?

In our last article about why a man can fall out of love, and why this happens most often, we talked in some detail about the reasons for the cooling of relations between spouses. Now it seems important to tell our beautiful readers what they can do to save a marriage, which is quite real, and even desirable, because divorce, and especially an unhappy life, is the last thing.

In addition, the first reason for a man’s inattention to his own wife is often her own inattention to herself, namely, to her appearance. After all, how often, having got the man of their dreams, girls relax and increasingly allow themselves to wear not beautiful, but “comfortable” things, and forget what cosmetics and personal care are. And “more and more often,” as we know, quickly turns into “always.”

Feminine beauty is your true strength

And if you are sure that your husband has stopped loving you, and your relationship has ceased to be as hot as at the beginning, then in order to return the man’s love, and in order to “shake up” the relationship with your spouse and become attractive to him again, I suggest you first change your image.

You shouldn’t go to extremes and, for example, dye your hair green, but you can easily give yourself a beautiful haircut, dye your hair a brighter color, learn several ways to style your hair, and also update your wardrobe. At the same time, it is not necessary to spend a huge amount of money on this matter!

Today there are a lot of private stylists, makeup artists and hairdressers working from home, and finding them on the Internet is not difficult. For an affordable price, they will not only put your image in order, but will also give practical advice, drawing attention to what we ourselves are sometimes unable to see. Give yourself the pleasure of going to such a stylist and choosing a new look for yourself, and positive changes in your relationship with your spouse will not take long to arrive!

How to get your husband's love back?

Another reason that a husband stops loving his wife is often her behavior as a “typical mommy” towards him. If you are hyper-responsible, are used to taking on all the worries, and do not allow a man to make even the simplest decision on his own, then you are at risk.

To save the relationship in such a case, so that your husband loves you again, you must learn to let go of the grip of control. It is clear that you will not be able to change your way of thinking and behavior immediately, but you can start with small things.

For example, before you decide something, as always, on your own, just ask him about his opinion on this matter. Try to ask him for advice on business or other matters as often as possible. Your requests for advice in those areas in which your man understands like a duck to water will be especially valuable.

Words of gratitude are music for your man

Don’t be shy to ask him for help, and don’t forget to sincerely thank him for it, even if the man didn’t complete his task perfectly. We all make mistakes, and constant criticism can discourage anyone from deciding anything. But it is precisely criticism and constant “piles” that are the most common reasons for the cooling of relations between spouses, and sometimes lead to divorce! Therefore, in order to return the love of your husband, you need to “repent” and start doing exactly the opposite.

Men's hobbies and family relationships: how are they connected?

Often men isolate themselves from their women and stop loving them because the latter do not accept, condemn and do not understand their hobbies, be it fishing, sports, cars or collecting some things.

Misunderstanding between men and women is quite normal, because we are built completely differently! Therefore, ladies often cannot understand what interesting the husband finds in sitting on the shore for several hours waiting for the movement of the float.

However, if you want to avoid your man’s indifference towards you, try to treat his hobby, if not positively, then at least tolerantly. Stop judging him for it. After all, it is quite possible that for him this is the only outlet that allows him to distract himself from the negative, so as not to “drain” it on you!

By depriving a man of a hobby, you deprive him of this outlet, and then anything can happen. For example, instead of a collectible model of a car, he will bring home a bottle of beer, then wine or vodka, and then he’s not far from alcohol addiction!

Try approaching your man and asking him to talk about his hobby. Ask him when he began to get involved in his business, what pushed him to do it. Let him tell you about the most valuable cars in his collection or the biggest fish he has ever caught.

Even if you are not very interested in hearing about it, remember that by behaving in this way, you are strengthening family relationships. By the way, it may well be that after listening to his hobby several times, you will appreciate it and join your spouse in his favorite activity.

“The ideal wife” is the reason for the cooling of relationships

As they say, any coin always has two sides. Sometimes a woman loses the attention of her beloved husband precisely because she has become too ideal, good, available at any time and obedient for him. That is, he loses himself as a person, completely dissolving in the life of a man.

Men often lose interest in their wives precisely because they understand perfectly well: all they have to do is “whistle”, and the chosen one will immediately appear in front of them, ready to serve, understand, listen and please. The hunter's instinct pushes representatives of the stronger sex to look for a new “challenge” in their lives, and this can lead to betrayal.

Men love to achieve

To improve the situation, try to stop being available to your spouse, at least in small things. For example, stop calling him every chance you get. Believe me, nothing bad will happen if he doesn’t hear from you the routine “how are you?” and “have you eaten?” Give your husband a little more space, and then he might be willing to call you.

Have you ever tried not to answer his call? Or do you always rush to the phone at the first sound of a ringtone? Try it! Just don’t answer, and then, when he calls back, babble into the phone: “Sorry, dear, for some reason I didn’t hear the call!” It would seem like such a trifle, but it can still help warm up the relationship.

If you are always available to a man, he will be calm. He knows that as soon as he needs you, he will immediately “reach out” to you. And then suddenly it doesn’t work out! And then his thoughts will abruptly switch from work, leisure or friends to you.

Where are you? Why don't you pick up the phone? And even if a man is annoyed by the fact that he cannot reach you by phone, he will still think about you, and not about business, or “the legs of that pretty employee.” Accordingly, it will be very, very difficult for your husband to stop loving you, because the one they think about more often is the one they love more.

Men are hunters by nature

But you also need to know when to stop. Perhaps you rush to the door at the first sound of his steps in the corridor? This is simply wonderful! But only when your company does not become too intrusive. If the relationship has become stable and “settled into a rut,” then something unusual and sometimes inconvenient will help shake it up.

Try going to the store five minutes before your spouse arrives! And in most cases, not finding his wife at home, the husband will call and look for her. And at this time he will again think only about her.

Do you try to spend every second with him after he comes home from work and he plays computer or watches football? Try to silently get up and leave. Not even from home, but just to another room! Remember forgotten hobbies, whatever they may be: floriculture, embroidery, drawing, knitting, or even sculpting clay cats!

Go to another room and get distracted by your favorite activity. Try to distract yourself even mentally during this time. Then, it is likely that your man will discover the absence of the usual “background noise” behind him in the form of your “darling, how are you at work?”, “let’s talk” and “why are you silent?”, and he will go to look for the source of this “noise” . After all, something went wrong as he was used to, and he, of course, will want to sort it out.

Men need emotions

Some psychologists seriously advise giving your husband a much more serious “shake-up”, for example, getting lost at the airport just before the flight to the resort where you bought tickets, and “being found” after the plane has safely departed.

Such an outburst, of course, will shake your husband the most, and may even provoke a huge scandal. However, sometimes men, especially those with a family, are extremely lacking in strong emotions in life, and you will give him these emotions. However, be extremely careful, and if you are not confident in yourself or your situation is completely catastrophic, you should not take such radical measures.

Instead, you can, for example, “get lost” in a store when your husband is sitting behind the wheel of a car at the entrance and waiting for you. At first he will wait with a bored look, then he will get worried, start calling you, and if you don’t answer, he will lock the car and rush off in search of you.

Of course, when he finds you, he will scream and swear, but you shouldn’t get upset about this - after all, anger is a defensive reaction for men when they are worried.

But I want to warn you: you shouldn’t play the “unavailable lady” and abuse the above tips. After all, this can only aggravate the situation: your spouse may think that you have found another man, or will simply be offended, deciding that you have become indifferent to him.

Also, you should not ostentatiously bring home flowers bought at the nearest stall and solemnly announce that a work colleague is paying special attention to you. After all, every man, deep down in his soul, is very afraid that a woman will cheat on him! And the reaction to betrayal or even suspicion of it can be very ambiguous! And even most likely it will further aggravate your situation and reduce your mutual love with your spouse.

So, show feminine wisdom, and our self-development portal wishes you a harmonious and happy relationship with your spouse. A relationship in which there will be enough stability, confidence in each other and calmness, and bright emotions, experiences and new falls in love with each other!

Stay with us! And also read the first part of this article, and of course, about that and.


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