I can't forget my lover. A method that will help you forget your mistress, even if you are very attracted to her
It happens that people break up. This can happen even to those who originally planned to be close to each other all their lives. A lot of people go through this. And today we will talk about how to forget your ex-love, and how to end the relationship yourself. So, the topic of our article today is “How to forget your lover and break off all relations with him.”
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Photo gallery: How to forget your lover and break off all relations with him
How to forget your lover and break off all relations with him? No, I can’t, I won’t succeed. This is what many girls think who still have feelings for their once significant other.
You love him, but you have to forget him. The reasons may be different. For example, his feelings for you have faded. Or maybe you realized that he is not the hero of your novel for some reason. Or he is married, and you decided to break this vicious circle, or to be more precise, the triangle. Or perhaps you cannot be together for some force majeure reason. The fact remains that you have to get him out of your life and out of your head and move on with your life.
How to forget a lover
No matter how bitter it is, you must remember that life does not end there, and the light did not converge on it like a wedge. Many people go through a painful breakup. As they say, time heals. In moments of heartache, it seems that you will never forget him, and nothing can ease your suffering. But that's not true.
Of course, there is no recipe that could instantly relieve mental trauma, but there are ways to make this difficult period easier.
First, if your ex initiated your breakup, try to internally forgive him and let him go, no matter how difficult it may seem. It will ease your soul. Try to express your aggression and resentment on paper - write him a letter, but don’t send it. In this letter, scold him, tell him about your pain, write about everything bad that happened in your relationship and in him.
Come to terms with the breakup. If you want to forget your ex, don’t keep the hope in your soul that he will return and everything will be as before. You can give vent to your feelings and cry, but not for long - don’t let melancholy and depression cover you completely.
Cut ties with your ex. If you are still stuck with some unresolved issues, resolve them quickly. After that you can stop communicating with him. At least until your mental wound heals. Don't call or write to him. If you find it hard to resist this temptation, delete his contacts. “Remaining friends” won’t work, at least not yet.
Get rid of everything that might remind you of him: gifts, photographs, letters, etc. If you can’t throw it away, then collect everything in a box and hide it away so that all these little things don’t catch your eye and open your wound.
Don't wear things that he liked and that remind him of him. Try to avoid your favorite places. Try to temporarily not communicate with people who connect you with him or remind you of him.
Under no circumstances should you have sex with your ex, try to avoid meeting him, stop thinking about revenge and don’t do anything stupid. This could have bad consequences for yourself.
Clean the apartment, rearrange it, throw out everything unnecessary. Make room in your apartment and in your life. If you feel really bad, you can start repairs.
Call your friends and have a spiritual get-together. Wash the bones of men. Let your friends tell you frankly what they think about your ex. Just don't get discouraged. You can drink a bottle of wine, but you shouldn’t get drunk, because the main goal of this bachelorette party is to get friendly support and cheer up.
Don't sit at home, go for a walk, chat with friends, go to the cinema, to a cafe, to a skating rink, to a club, etc.. Come up with a hobby. Don’t get bored at home, but do what you love, read good books, watch comedies, play computer games, etc.
Change your image. Get a new haircut or change your hair color. Go shopping, buy yourself something new from clothes and cosmetics. Go in for sports, preferably in the gym, not at home, because... Group classes are more effective in lifting your mood. The type of sport is not important, it is important that the negativity leaves you along with sweat, and that you are tired and happy. Focus on work or study. This will help distract you, and maybe even become an impetus for your career growth.
Meet new people, chat, flirt, make fans. Not all men are the same. But don't compare everyone to your ex. It is a passed stage, but somewhere ahead a real feeling awaits you, the main thing is not to miss it.
You can go somewhere to relax. Choose something in accordance with your interests and financial capabilities. A change of environment will be good therapy.
If you have a child, then devote more time and attention to him. Go to the cinema, zoo, circus, amusement park, etc. to distract yourself and have fun.
Find something positive in your breakup, there will probably be one.
Pamper yourself in different ways. Take a relaxing bath with foam and essential oil, go for a massage, go to a beauty salon, etc. Do everything that makes you happy, distract yourself from sad thoughts.
By following these tips, you will get over the breakup easier and forget your ex-love faster.
But what to do if this relationship is a burden for you? How to break them? You most likely want everything to go smoothly, calmly and civilized, but it’s not a fact that it will be exactly like that. It depends on your partner's reaction.
There are several main ways to break up.
First of the ways- take a break in the relationship. Choose a neutral moment and say something like: “Strong feelings came over us, I’m even scared. Everything is too strong, bright and complex. I need time to figure it out. Let's take a break." After the break is given the go-ahead, you can drag it out as long as necessary, for example, forever.
Another way– do everything possible so that your partner leaves you. You need to terrorize him, pester him, do petty nasty things, pretend to be a jealous fury, it all depends on your imagination. Get on a man's nerves, gracefully mock him, insult him, mock his sexual capabilities, irritate him with your behavior, make scandals with or without reason, do stupid things, embarrass him in front of his friends, bother him, come up with various reasons for a quarrel, stop having sex with him sex, etc., until the man’s patience runs out. A funny way that requires time and imagination.
Next method– parting “in English.” A dishonest method, but an effective one. Avoid him in every possible way, do not answer his calls, letters, messages, etc. If he does get through, tell him something like: “I’m very busy, I have a lot of work. I'll call you back." And don't call. Soon the man will understand everything. And even if he finds you and demands an explanation, it will not be so difficult, because he has already understood everything and is ready for the worst.
And one more way, the most difficult, but also noble - to say everything directly. Here you may have to gather courage and think through your speech. Most likely, there will be a difficult conversation, and not everything will go smoothly. But over time, when a person calms down, he will understand that he was treated fairly and treated with respect.
Relationships with a married man rarely give positive results: you remain in the role of a mistress, but even if he leaves the family, there is an eternal fear that one day this will happen to you. It is better to nip such love in the bud: even when you allow a small affair, try not to count on something serious, because life goes on, and you need to move on.
Not knowing how to stop loving a married man, seek the help of psychologists. Their advice will help you out in a difficult situation, help you understand yourself and find the strength to move on with your life. Source: Flickr (Halina_Reshetova)
Disadvantages of a relationship with a married man, why it is better to break it off
In search of a solution to the problem of how to forget a married man and survive the pain of separation, you should understand how bad such relationships are:
- Building your happiness by breaking up families is immoral, because another woman also deserves love.
- A flighty man will never become a reliable family man.
- There are practically no prospects for relationships, since you are destined for the role of only a mistress.
- Once you make a mistake or stop taking care of yourself, you will most likely be abandoned by your gentleman.
- We have to hide our feelings and spend holidays separately.
- You adapt to your partner, forgetting about yourself, and are forced to be content with little.
This is interesting! Statistics are an inexorable thing, and according to them, about 5% of men go to their mistresses, while the rest are quite happy with a double life.
Advice from a psychologist: how to forget and stop loving a married man
Not knowing how to stop loving a married man, seek the help of psychologists. Their advice will help you out in a difficult situation, help you understand yourself and find the strength to move on with your life.
If you love him, how to survive the pain of parting
- Analyze the situation. If your partner has not left his wife during your relationship, it means he loves her. It is unlikely that you will be able to destroy such a relationship, no matter how sad it may be for you.
- Make sure the man is happy. This method is quite cruel, but effective. Just go to his house incognito, see that he feels great with his wife - you won’t be able to break this happiness.
- Find a new hobby for yourself - let it be fitness, work, a fan, or relaxing with friends. Immerse yourself in something you enjoy and you will find that it gets easier over time.
- Think about the shortcomings of your boyfriend, about how you had to hide from your wife, how sad it is to sit alone on March 8th, watching him leave for her. Do you need such feelings? Maybe you should find a more worthy company for yourself?
- Change yourself and change your environment. Take time off on vacation or on a business trip, get a new hairstyle, renovate your apartment, get rid of photos taken together. Make sure that nothing reminds you of your past relationship.
If you are married yourself
It is easier for a married lady to survive the bitterness of separation: there is someone nearby who will console you in difficult times and show love. Think about why you got married, what advantages your spouse has, how unfair you are treating him. Try to find something new in a relationship, to rekindle the extinguished spark. Relax together, spend time, try to look beautiful just for your husband.
This is interesting! If you and your husband have sincere feelings, think about the child: the appearance of a new family member will relieve difficult thoughts.
It’s better to turn your attention to other hobbies, spend time usefully, and if all else fails, visit a psychologist. Source: Flickr (Matt_Haddaway)
If he left you and doesn't love you
Wasting your precious time on a busy gentleman is already a mistake, and if he doesn’t love you yet, it’s a doubly mistake. Most likely, you were just a temporary option for him. If a guy is cheating on his wife left and right, think about why you need such a flighty and irresponsible person. The main thing is not to get discouraged, or at least pretend that you feel comfortable. Over time, everything will return to normal, and not a trace will remain of the old feelings.
Recommendations on how to leave a married man and start a new life
Often something separates you from taking a decisive step. You don’t know how to leave a married man, you’re worried that you’ll be left alone. In this case, psychologists also stocked up with advice:
- Talk to a friend who didn't like your man, let her tell you about his negative qualities if you haven't noticed them before.
- See for yourself that the chosen one is far from ideal - his cowardice and duplicity alone are worth breaking up with.
- Take up your hobby or pay attention to other men, arrange a fun vacation for yourself, visit stores without answering your boyfriend’s phone calls.
- Just break all ties with him - change your contacts, address of residence and work, under no circumstances allow yourself to show weakness and meet him again.
- Create a scandal by demanding that you make a choice: if a man doesn’t love you, he will disappear on his own.
- Pretend to be sick - at first your companion will care, but soon he will simply dissolve and stop answering calls. This means that there was no love for you at all.
Now you know how to get rid of love for a married man - a relationship that in most cases is doomed to failure from the very beginning. This is not so difficult to do, because your boyfriend is far from ideal, and only disappointment and pain await you with him. It’s better to turn your attention to other hobbies, spend time usefully, and if all else fails, visit a psychologist.
Video on the topic
Question for a psychologist:
Hello. I was very confused in my family relationships because of a problem that I myself created literally out of the blue. My husband and I have been together for 7 years, dated for 3 and married for 4. From the moment we met until the story that happened to us, there was never any doubt that I was wrong in my choice. Everything was always good in our lives, relationships were built on complete trust and mutual understanding, we had many goals that we strived for, many common interests. My husband is both a friend and a good lover to me, and our family is a real strong union. 2 years ago our daughter was born, my husband started working in a well-paid job, everything was going well for us. Under random circumstances this summer, I met a man. He is a married man, he has been married for 8 years, he has a son. It so happened that intimacy happened between us. It didn’t happen by accident, but deliberately. When I first saw this man, I felt a wild attraction to him. Later she admitted to herself that even at the initial stage of her relationship with her husband she had not experienced anything like this, perhaps due to her inexperience at that time. The man with whom I cheated on my husband was simply my type, initially in appearance. After intimacy, I thought that we would never meet this person again, but circumstances developed such that we began to meet regularly. It’s just that circumstances began to bring us together so often that each meeting led to my intimate intimacy with him. We agreed to have sex without obligations, since we had no other options. We started meeting once every week, or whenever possible, since I’m on maternity leave and he’s working. We called each other just to see each other, either he called me or I called. Each of our meetings was an outburst of incredible emotions, I simply reveled in this man who was madly attracted to me. Our meetings were short-lived, but fruitful: we discussed neutral topics, joked, laughed, gave each other advice, and didn’t just talk about our other halves. I never interfered with his family, and he never interfered with mine. My relationship with my husband simply stopped at that time. My husband got tired after work and immediately went to bed. Deep down, this irritated me enormously, and I didn’t care that he was working hard for the sake of our family, so that we could live without denying ourselves anything. The lover simply came to my husband and I’s house, where another sin happened on our marital bed. He didn’t give me gifts, and I didn’t need them from him, there was just a strong attraction, a pleasure from waiting to meet him. I stopped seeing the world around me, reveled in the fact that my lover was absolutely my type of man, I began to recognize him from every meeting, I saw the positive sides in him, with the only exception of his unfaithfulness to his wife. My relationship with him began to develop into more than just no commitment. Then I began to realize that I was starting to fall in love with him, although I didn’t show it. Our relationship had lasted for six months, and deep down I began to understand that it gave me nothing except the destruction of my 7 years, which I lived happily with my husband. Yes, the lover is my type, but he is already busy and not with me. This hurt me, I began to bite my elbows, why didn’t I get him earlier, why wasn’t I his wife. On the intimate side, I gave myself to him without reserve. But before the New Year, I had a certain epiphany: I was frightened by the thought that this relationship could last for years, everything was too good and convenient for him. I decided to break this connection. I decided to honestly admit this to my husband, I simply did not have the strength to deceive him, I was tired of walking around with thoughts about my lover and hopes for meetings, which by the end of our relationship became simply weekly. During this time, my lover honestly admitted to me that he was drawn to me, and above all, my availability. Nothing more. The husband was simply unrecognizable; he was completely black with grief. In general, he is a very hidden person, it’s hard to get him emotional. He keeps everything to himself. At first, he decided to file for divorce, since I trampled him like a man, bringing my lover to our house. I honestly admitted that the other one was just my type, which for some unknown reason I did not want to let go of. Then we found the strength to talk and decided to start all over again, but for more than a month now our relationship remains very strained. After confessing to my husband, I called my lover and told everything as it was. He said why did I tell him, it was so good after all, he was very scared for his family, what would happen if his wife found out everything, he said that in principle he was happy with everything in life, he just had been missing something in his relationships lately, he admitted that he had a strong sympathy for me, but he didn’t want to radically change his life. We agreed to delete each other’s numbers and not call again, and also thanked each other for what happened, and that was the end of it. My husband, by the way, then called him and said a few words to him, I think you know what. He listened to everything calmly and couldn’t even say anything. This is how our story with him ended. But I still can't forget it. My husband has already explained to me, from a man’s point of view, how beneficial it is to have a married mistress, that I was simply taken advantage of, nothing more, and I kind of understand this, but my heart can’t let go of it, how is it that he came to see me for six months, called , said that he was bored, and so he immediately and quickly disappeared. I still can't accept it. On the one hand, I want to fix everything with my husband. We go over this topic every day, we get offended, we make peace, sex has become passionate, but our relationship is still very difficult, like scales, sometimes everything seems to be getting better, sometimes it just doesn’t work out. On the one hand, I don’t want to lose my family, deprive my daughter of her father, because after all, my husband and I were fine right up until the moment I met someone else. Yes, even if my husband is not my type, but I chose him for life and never regretted it until I met someone else. On the other hand, I can’t let go of the thought of that other man, how he left me so quickly, it was still so good, why did he leave my life like that right away? I always thought that if it were possible to unite these two men, this would be my ideal person with whom I would like to connect my life. How can I let go of the thought of a lover whose phone number I still remember by heart? How to resist the temptation to call? My husband said that he forgave me only because we have a daughter and because I found the strength to confess. If I repeat this, there will be a divorce. But I don’t want to get a divorce, because I always lived happily in harmony with my husband, and I still remember my lover, How to restore harmony in the soul, return calm to a once-happy family, into which another man simply intervened one day. And most importantly, how can I forget this other person who simply turned my life upside down without even wanting it? Help please. My husband and I are simply emotionally devastated.
A psychologist answers the question.
Hello Alena!
You have written a lot about how good your life is with your husband and how relationships in your family are developing harmoniously. But strong relationships do not mean stability and complete harmony. When everything goes well for too long, you stop appreciating it. In addition, the basis of relationships is respect for the personality of the other. Ask yourself why did you succumb to passions and commit treason? You are an intelligent woman who can control her sexual instincts. It was not passion that blinded you, you deliberately chose it, but for this reason it is worth understanding yourself.
You clearly understood that you were committing, as you write, a “sin.” Those. for you this was not the norm, and in your moral values it is considered a sin and can lead to adverse consequences. But nevertheless, you went for it. It is worth saying that this did not happen on the day when you gave yourself to another man, but rather an accumulative state that was maturing and waiting for the right situation. Surely, being in a relationship with your husband, you had the opportunity to see and communicate with other men who showed sympathy for you, but you carried a different message, because at that time your relationship with your husband was significant and valuable to you. But at some point you allowed yourself more. This is normal, a woman develops and reveals herself throughout her life. Some sides of you were hidden from you; you either did not allow yourself “forbidden” thoughts and fantasies, or the dynamics of the development of your relationship with your husband suited you. Gradually, you began to miss what you had, but most likely you did not attach any importance to it. I assume that you, in principle, were not previously inclined to analyze your family, feel the peaks and valleys and track changes in feelings. Everything developed and went as usual and you were happy with it; it’s unlikely that you made a huge effort for this. But a person is designed in such a way that when something comes easy to him, it is rarely appreciated... so you yourself didn’t notice how you began to perceive your husband and family as something that will not go anywhere, as a matter of course.
In addition, your relationship with your husband was initially built on partnership and friendship, and not on passion and uncontrollable attraction. You write that your lover is your type, but it turns out that your husband is not your type? Then what was valuable and important about your husband when you chose him? You also mention that even at the beginning of the relationship with your husband, you did not experience what you experienced with your lover. This is what you were missing, but you didn’t attach any importance to it, because outwardly everything was good, stable and correct! And this was your omission, because it is the woman who is responsible for the atmosphere in the family. Apparently, before your relationship with your husband, you either did not have such serious and long-term hobbies, or you had them, but they were insignificant, so you did not have time to fully know yourself and experience those very passions in order to understand what is really more important: passion and desire or strong union based on equality and respect for each other. Passion and constant sexual attraction sooner or later leaves the relationship, but in this place deep affection appears, the value of a loved one increases, and the path traveled together is something more important and meaningful than vivid sex.
Your husband correctly told you that for a married man, a married mistress is the ideal option for sex on the side. Moreover, you didn’t ask for anything else! You devalued yourself so much in his eyes that he didn’t even try to please you with gifts, flowers, surprises, etc. This is what a man truly in love does without prompting. This is his instinct, he conquers like that, you don’t even need to ask him about it. Your lover told you honestly that he was attracted by your availability; moreover, he didn’t even have to strain to rent an apartment nearby or rent a hotel room so that it would be at least on neutral territory. He really just took advantage of you, and you continue to entertain yourself with the illusion that he misses you and is drawn to you. There will be hundreds of others in your place, and you, too, most likely will not be the first, although you may not know about it. The most valuable thing a Woman has is her sense of self-worth. If you have lost it, then you have also deprived your husband of this core. You really hurt him a lot, especially on your family bed! Try to put yourself in his shoes. If your husband cheated on you with another woman on your bed, in your house, where your things are, your child plays, how would you feel? You can close your eyes to an isolated incident, spontaneous, thoughtless, under the influence of feelings/emotions/attraction, but you have built a system of such relationships, this is no longer a situational betrayal, it can also be regarded as a betrayal, and a conscious one at that.
By and large, Alena, you could get these emotions from your husband, but for this you had to be interested in a relationship with him and personally build a family, consciously, and not go with the flow and languish in anticipation of a miracle. You write that sex with your husband has become brighter, have you ever wondered why, what has changed? Your husband remains the same type, with the same hands and body, but you feel different with him, why? Think about it. Think about when and why you stopped appreciating and respecting him? And of course, you need to decide whether you want to continue to be close to him, will you, having once betrayed him, be able to raise him again in your eyes and be true to him and to yourself?
Are you asking how to restore harmony to a once happy family? No way. These are the very consequences for which you are responsible. And only time and your joint efforts in this direction will help ease your experiences, but they will remain with you forever. The wound that you inflicted on your husband will heal, but the scar will remain, this means that there will be no trust and idyll as before, there will be something else, something that you will build in this place. Of course, if you decide to stay married to your husband and work on your relationship, sooner or later you will begin to notice changes and notice thaws and closeness with each other, but there will also be experiences of fear and apprehension that if it suddenly happens again, moreover, both on your part and on the part of your husband...
Regarding your lover, you can thank him for revealing new emotions and experiences to you, somehow revealing your femininity in a new way, and perhaps liberating you in some way. Thank him mentally for this and let him go. You are right that he is not yours and never was yours. But for some reason you and your family needed him. This is an experience that will help you grow and reach a different level of life, while learning from the mistakes you made. Understand that some stories in life are corrected to a greater extent by time, so get ready for long-term work and do not try to force events for the sake of an external picture. If you want to talk in more detail, you can write to me by email, I will definitely answer.
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I'll start from afar.
I have been married for 14 years and during all these years I have never cheated on my husband (except for one time, which I will write about later). I can’t say that I’m happy in my marriage, many were on the verge of divorce, but a very long time ago they became somehow distant from each other. he is an unrestrained, rude person. however, I never had the thought of cuckolding him in my head, just as I never had the thought of looking around while my husband was alive. there was a certain melancholy that I wanted simple female happiness, love, the affection of mutual understanding, i.e. what I don’t get in marriage. I began to wonder more and more often whether I should get a divorce, but I didn’t think that my search for female happiness could somehow justify me and deprive my child of a father (we have a 7-year-old daughter).
This is where it all happened... there was a business trip abroad with colleagues from work. It so happened that all the time free from work was spent in noisy company. One of my colleagues and I spent half the night wandering around the city, drinking beer (it was hot there even at night). in a word - spring, a warm southern night, a pleasant person - the evening, or rather late night, continued in his room - they just sat and talked without any continuation. We spent the next day and evening together again, tramping all over the local sights, the only difference was that we ended up in the same bed. in general, everything is banal. the next day was the last day of the business trip, they were together again, deep in thought from what had happened the day before, however, the couple decided that from then on everything would be as if nothing had happened. he has a family and two children, I also have a family. When we parted, I asked him if it was because it all happened because we both weren’t very sober? said no...
In general, we returned home, because we work together, sometimes we met at work, we tried to pretend that everything was the same. but it was difficult for me. As it turned out, it’s so difficult to take what happened and get it out of my head, but I thought I could handle it...
Meanwhile, my relationship with my husband was only getting worse, and we went on vacation for almost a month. and on the day of my departure, my same colleague called me and began to say that he could not get that very night out of his head, and that the only thing he regretted was that he was not sober. I almost burst into tears, but said that there would be no continuation, and went on vacation.
On vacation, my husband and I argued every day and decided to get a divorce upon arrival.
when I returned, I met my colleague at work, that’s when everything started spinning... both couldn’t stop, it all happened right at work... he was affectionate, gentle, unhurried and so confident in what he was doing that I even I had no idea that something like this could happen to me. and I suddenly realized that this is exactly what I had been missing all my life, that I was a WOMAN, and not a free application for making money, keeping the house in order and satisfying my husband.
stupid and banal, right? but such changes began to occur in me that my friends began to ask if I had fallen in love. Yes, I myself saw that I was blossoming before my eyes, that my eyes were glowing so much that men began to turn around after me. My husband and I began to live separately and began to get divorced.
Don’t think that I intended to ruin this man’s family or suddenly hoped that our relationship could continue. no, I was fully aware that I needed to stop this before we both got bogged down head over heels. my man described what was happening for himself as “gray hair in the beard - a devil in the rib” (he was 41, I was 34). We decided that we needed to tie the knot, but we didn’t succeed right away - we met periodically almost all of last summer. then they broke up, maintaining friendly relations without any sex.
I again tried to make peace with my husband, we’ve been living together since winter and I’m expecting a second child from him.
but why am I writing - when I meet that man at work, I can’t put myself in order for a forgery. Now I’m sitting with my eyes wet - last week I had to communicate with him a lot - and he found out that I was pregnant, he was very happy for me that everything with my husband had returned to normal.
And here I sit, roar, fool...
what do you ask? After all, I’m already living my own life, but I understand that I’m offended by the fact that it all happened so easily for him, and I still can’t forget him. Why does it happen to some women that for their sake a man is ready to go through fire and water, and to give up everything in the world just to be with her, but for someone, having weighed everything, he quickly forgot?
Sorry it’s so long and confusing... I just realized one more thing for myself: I won’t be able to do anything useful with my husband, despite having children...
Did you believe that someday he would get divorced and you would be together, but time passed and nothing changed: do you still remain only an alternate airfield for him? In this case, your decision to break off the relationship and forget the married man is absolutely correct: the years go by, female beauty is fleeting, it is better to spend this time looking for the man who will be free and can start a family with you. But what if you still love a married man?
How to forget a married man once and for all
Surely now you regret that you once decided to have a relationship with a married man. Of course, this is immoral and wrong, but sometimes you can’t order your heart - a relationship begins, you are together for some time, but at some point you realize that this cannot continue. He does not leave the family, and you are tired of waiting and decided to end this relationship. What to do?
First, understand that if a man has not left the family and remains married to her, then most likely everything is serious with them and he values his wife and family, no matter how painful it may be for you.
There is a fairly effective, but stressful and cruel method - to see the happiness of your beloved married man. It is not necessary to communicate with him. You can simply go to where your loved one often goes with his wife and children.
Look at how he behaves with his family, what kind of relationship he has. This will help you finally understand that there is no place for you in his life - he decided so. You will understand that there are very real people around your beloved married man, and not some abstract personalities that the man does not talk to you about.
Imagine what will happen if you destroy this family. Will all these people be happy? Often after this, making the decision to break up is much easier. It will hurt at first. However, this method sobers the mind, and as a result, after just a couple of days of unbearable suffering, you will feel relief.
To forget a married person, consult a psychologist. Don't hesitate to do this before you get depressed. In this case, it will not be funny at all, and you will have to be treated for quite a long time by other specialists. Start dealing with the problem now.
Switch your attention. Fitness saves some, while volunteer work saves others. If you think a short novel will help you, don't give up on the idea. The main thing now is to achieve harmony in the soul. And remember, in such cases you should always believe that the greatest love is ahead!
If you met at your home, redecorate. Ruthlessly get rid of gifts and things that remind you of your married loved one. Immerse yourself in the hassle of renovations and completely renovate your home so that it is unrecognizable. When you finish, you will realize that your new life has already begun.
How to end a relationship with a married man and forget him
How to end a relationship with a married man and start living your own life? If you have decided to do just that and now need advice, we will help you!
It is very important to understand that communicating with a person who has a family is fraught with many pitfalls. So few women dare to admit that their lovers will never leave their wives. Meanwhile, statistics are inexorable, and in 90% of cases this is what happens. First, the men say that they need to put their children on their feet, and divorce is impossible now, then they talk about how their wives are very sick, and if they leave them now, then things will end badly.
As a result, a married man is in the most advantageous position: he lives in familiar conditions and at the same time gets the opportunity to satisfy all his needs on the side. The question is, why change anything at all? This is how the relationship continues until the representative of the stronger sex “ripes” to the necessary decision, or until the woman herself decides to stop all this.
It is quite possible that you choose the second option and you will be right. Years pass, and you are still essentially alone. But very soon you will want, if not children and grandchildren, then at least simply the presence of a dear person in your life - it is so pleasant to share joys and sorrows with him. But you have no one! It's time to break this vicious circle. Just tell yourself that this relationship is a passed stage. They need to be completed, you need to forget your married man in order to find your happiness.
Of course, after you decide to end your relationship with the married man you love, you run the risk of becoming depressed, or at least feeling empty. Don't be alarmed, this is a completely normal condition. The main thing is to endure it for a while. Notice that every day it will become easier and easier. And soon the feelings will be completely forgotten or disappear completely.
If you do not have the strength to take and end the relationship, you cannot forget the married man, do the following - give him an ultimatum: either you - or the wife. You either leave or become a wife. They say that this is how Marina Zudina got Oleg Tabakov as her husband. So don't underestimate this method. If your beloved married man starts fussing and trying to sit on two chairs, tell yourself the truth: do you really need this cowardly, slippery man?
How to end a relationship with a married man
To get in the right frame of mind, imagine yourself in the role of your man’s wife. Do you think it would be pleasant for you to realize that you are being deliberately and systematically cheated on? Surely not. So, always remember this. Building your own happiness while destroying the lives of other people is not only immoral, but also short-sighted, because the ancients said that evil acts like a boomerang - by launching it into the world, we doom ourselves to meet it.
If you think it will help you, find yourself another admirer and spend time with him so that you can forget the married man and feel loved at the same time. If a man who has a family does not want to end his relationship with you, appear in front of him in the company of another person - in this case, even the most dull representatives of the stronger sex are able to draw conclusions.
Do you feel like you need to discuss this issue? Don't hesitate to consult a psychologist. We cannot always trust our friends or parents. But a specialist can listen and give useful advice, keeping your conversation secret.
We hope that these tips will definitely help you.
Have a sincere conversation with the man. Be frank and tell him everything as it is: you are tired of constant deception and the need to hide, you just want to live your life and go out without fear, not be afraid that your wife will see you two now. An adequate man should understand you. If you separate by mutual consent, it will be easier for you to forget your lover who is married.
By the way, perhaps it is at this moment that he will feel that he is ready to leave his family and be with you. Very often men delay making this decision, which is not surprising. The fact is that the average married man who has a mistress is happy with everything: the first one cooks, cleans and ensures a comfortable life in every possible way, while the second one is good in intimate and emotional terms. At the same time, no one is indignant - is it worth changing something?
Yes, in most cases this is what happens. The only difference is that everyone involved in the story suffers. It’s still hard for the husband to be torn in all directions, the wife feels betrayed, and you are tormented by remorse and secretly hope that someday your lover will be only with you.
According to statistics, about 5-7% of men who cheat on their wives go to their mistresses. As soon as you ask them about this, they begin to come up with all sorts of excuses: the children need to be put on their feet, the wife is threatening to commit suicide, etc. So don’t expect that your lover will definitely return to you. If you know for sure that this will not happen, it’s time to think about how to forget your married lover.
If a man has clearly not made a choice in your favor, take a closer look at him. Is he really that good and why do you love him? Would a real man behave like this, deliberately keeping you in the role of a “straw widow” - neither married nor free. Maybe you are exaggerating its merits? Talk about this with your friend, who has always disliked him. Surely she has observations that she did not share with you, not wanting to upset you. But now is the time.
Cheat on your lover or lie about doing it. Watch his reaction. Let him feel himself in your shoes, because he cheats on you with his wife every day.
Finally, to forget your married lover, you can simply leave for a while (or forever), change your phone numbers, email address, and delete your contacts from all social networks. Forget a man, and most likely he will forget you too.
Rest assured, your true love is yet to come!