How to break off a relationship with the man you love. How to break an addictive relationship

Love is one of the most beautiful and inexplicable feelings on earth. Thanks to her influence, many famous personalities created their masterpieces. As the popular French prose writer and critic F. Beigbeder said: “Love lives for three years.” You may agree or think that this expression is complete nonsense. But, paying attention to modern statistics, about 40% of couples end their relationship after so many years.

How to break off a relationship and save your nerves

To begin with, I would like to note that leaving your partner using the phone or mobile instant messengers is very low and mean. Have the courage to communicate your difficult decision while looking him in the eye. Put yourself in this person's shoes and think about whether it would hurt you to receive a regular breakup message? After all, the very process of stopping any contact is in itself difficult and painful. The tips given in the article will help you find the answer to the question of how to break up a relationship with a guy without unnecessary hysterics.

1. The first point is to be honest with yourself. Understand yourself, think about the whole situation, consider the pros and cons. It is worth understanding that in most cases a woman is quite emotional, and most often her thoughts are thoughtless and chaotic.
2. Try to sensibly assess future prospects with your young man. Perhaps ending the relationship is too drastic a decision. Suddenly everything can be fixed with a sincere and honest conversation.
3. If the first point did not give the desired results, then you should confidently and without hesitation put an end to it. There are couples who break up every week and then return to each other again. Such actions only torment both partners and do not give them any positive emotions.
4. Be determined and endure the withdrawal caused by the habit. It is then that you will be able to let go of the person and begin to look at life completely differently.
5. During the process of breaking up, keep your emotions in check. Don't cry or scream. Maintain tolerance and a neutral tone of voice. Explain to your partner the detailed reasons why you came to this decision.
6. Don't stand still - move on with your life! Your wonderful life does not end when your relationship ends. You can still do what you love, travel, relax with friends and visit your parents.
7. Start learning something new, sign up for a foreign language or cooking course. Keep yourself busy with interesting things, because you have much more personal time. Don't waste it, expand your horizons!

How to break off a relationship with your husband or wife

A more difficult separation is for married couples who, in addition, have children. After all, in this whole process, they are the ones who are most susceptible to suffering and anxiety. Sometimes confused parents maintain an illusion for the sake of the child. But more often than not, such theater ends with the same break in relations.

Use the tips in this article to break off your relationship with your lover. But it is worth paying attention to additional points that broken families should adhere to.

1. Allow your child to see the other parent. He needs meaningful relationships for healthy maturation and to prevent childhood trauma that may appear during adolescence.
2. Accept financial help from your ex-partner. Put your pride away and think about your growing baby. Give him everything he needs for a fulfilling life, let him help you with this.
3. If the child is of a conscious age, discuss the current situation with him and let him speak out about it. Always be an open and honest parent to your child, and you will not have any future confrontations with a rebellious teenager or an embittered adult with childhood trauma.

Remember that many relationships can be saved. To do this, it is enough to always open up and understand each other, conduct a direct and honest dialogue, give advice and follow it. Listen to your partner, because it’s not for nothing that you chose him among the billions of people.

Of course, ending a relationship is never easy. It can be equally emotionally draining for both parties. Before deciding to end a relationship, you definitely need to think it over carefully and weigh all the pros and cons. And only after this can you finally decide to break up. When you are confident in the outcome of the relationship, you need to remember that your soon-to-be ex-boyfriend (or girlfriend) was once very dear to you. Be honest but don't be cruel, be compassionate but don't give him false hope. By choosing the right words and gathering your strength, you can end the relationship, causing a minimum of emotional pain to your partner. Be careful because the breakup will of course take a toll on your feelings as well.

Steps

Part 1

1. First, think again about whether you really want to end the relationship. You should not threaten your partner with a breakup if you just had a fight. If you have said that you want to end the relationship, be prepared to take responsibility for your words. Talk, discuss the problems and the current situation, and then make the final choice. Many men and women are unhappy in their relationships for years because they do not discuss the problems that arise between them. In the end, this inevitably leads to a break in the relationship.

   • If you really want to end the relationship, make a list of reasons why you think you are unhappy in the relationship. These must be problems that cannot be corrected.

2. Make your decision with a clear mind. Do not try to break off a relationship in a fit of anger, during a quarrel, or after a difficult week when you blame the relationship for all the troubles. Before you make this important decision, seek the opinion of a trusted friend or parent - people who may have helpful thoughts about your relationship.

   Choose the right time and place to tell your partner about your decision. This should be a place where you can be alone. Don't end your relationship with your partner before some important event in his life! For example, before a serious exam or interview. Friday is best for this, because over the weekend your almost ex-boyfriend (or girlfriend) will be able to come to his senses at least a little.

   • A not very suitable place to break up a relationship is your favorite cafe, restaurant or park where you usually walk. Choose a neutral and calm place that won't mean anything to either of you.
   • Choose a time when you are in a relatively calm emotional state. You shouldn't announce a breakup if you know you have an important meeting at work the next day.

3. It is very important to tell your partner about your decision in person (in most cases). Tell him that you want to break off the relationship in person, no matter how scary the prospect may be. This way you will show him your respect.

   • It is acceptable to end a relationship over the phone if you are on a long trip and will not be able to meet for a very long time. Another circumstance where this is acceptable is in a relationship in which you are being manipulated. Of course, it will be much safer to end the relationship over the phone if your partner is prone to angry outbursts and violence.

   Part 2

   Let us know your decision

   1. Firmly state that you want to end the relationship. Speak confidently - if you mumble in the vain hope of gently breaking up with the person, this will ultimately only hurt him more. Breaking up a relationship doesn't have to be an overly dramatic event. Just calmly and directly say that you want to end the relationship, that you no longer see yourself in it. If you do it differently, you risk leaving the door open for a quarrel to start.

      • Be direct and don't give your partner any reason to think that this is a temporary breakup after which you might come back.
      • It may be hard for you and you don't want to hurt your partner, but you shouldn't give hope that this is just another quarrel. If you really have decided everything, you will only hurt your ex-boyfriend (girlfriend) with false hopes.

   2. Be honest, but not cruel. Your ex-boyfriend (girlfriend) must understand exactly why you want to end the relationship, but do not make him consider himself a complete insignificance after the breakup and become depressed. Be honest, tell us what you are not happy with. Speak directly, don't beat around the bush.

      • The hardest thing is to end a relationship because you simply no longer love the person. After all, this is not his fault. Even then, be completely honest, but try to soften the blow.
      • Once you have talked about the main reason for the breakup, you should not go through all the details again and confuse your partner. You shouldn’t bring up all the past problems and quarrels, much less stoop to insults.
      • You should not insult a person and humiliate him. Don't say: "I want to be with a normal man." Instead, say, “I think you just need to work on yourself.”
      • Whatever the reason, your decision should not come as a surprise to your ex-partner. If you regularly communicate, most likely your boyfriend (girlfriend) has already suspected that something is wrong.
      • Don't read out to him a huge list of reasons why you want to end the relationship. Boil it down to a couple of core issues. For example: “we have absolutely nothing in common,” “I’m tired of being torn between relationships and career, I don’t feel your support,” or “I want a family and children, but you don’t consider such prospects.” The reason must be specific and main.

   3. Be prepared for negative reactions. The person may become angry or panicked. If you notice a hint of aggression in his response, remain calm and try to reassure your partner. Even if your ex-boyfriend (girlfriend) starts screaming, try to speak calmly. If the situation gets out of control, tell him that you will end the conversation later when he comes to his senses.

      • You may have to console your ex after a breakup, but don't go too far. If the consolation develops into something else, express your opinion about it. You don't want to talk about the breakup again. Show mercy, but be honest and act with confidence and firmness.
      • If you are worried about your ex and are afraid to leave him/her alone, call his/her friend and explain what happened and that you don't want to leave him/her alone. Apologize for disturbing you and thank your friend for his help.
      • If your ex-boyfriend suddenly starts screaming and trying to hold you back, calmly say: “There is no point in shouting at each other. I have already made a decision, we will continue the conversation when you come to your senses. Let's talk in a while." Try not to turn the conversation into melodrama. Speak briefly and clearly, do not hurt the person.

   4. Discuss your interactions in the future. Once you've communicated your decision, set boundaries for future communication. Be polite, you should first discuss the current situation. Try to look at your past relationships as a lesson. Think about what you need to work on and what type of people you need.

      • If you have mutual friends but want to avoid each other for a while, come up with a plan where you can each see your friends but avoid each other.
      • If you all go to a cafe, gym or park together, make a schedule to avoid each other's company. Don't take it too seriously, but having a schedule will really help you.
      • If you live together, quickly figure out how to collect and move things without meeting each other.

   5. Think in advance where to go. One of the biggest mistakes in ending a relationship is pulling the cat by the tail. You just can’t take the last decisive step, and this series of incomprehensible meetings goes on and on. Immediately think about how to pick up things, where to move, how to divide joint property (if you have one). Don't pull the cat's tail.

      • When the topic of conversation has dried up and you have already discussed everything, it’s time to say goodbye. Agree when you will pick up your things and so on.
      • If your ex-boyfriend (girlfriend) still does not understand the reason for the breakup, try writing him a message or letter. In it, express again and in order everything you feel. It is much easier to understand yourself when no one is pulling you around.

   Part 3

   How to live after a breakup

   1. Don't try to remain friends. Trying to make friends immediately after you've decided to end the relationship will most likely fail. It’s best not to see each other for a while after a breakup. After some time (perhaps a few months or six months), when neither you nor your partner is in as much pain, perhaps you can try to start communicating again. Be respectful of your ex-boyfriend's (girlfriend's) feelings. He or she may need more time to recover than you. Do not impose your communication on him (her).

      • If your ex-boyfriend (girlfriend) asks if you can remain friends, answer in the negative. Say: “I think it’s best for us not to communicate at all for a while.” If he puts pressure on you, explain why staying friends is not a solution. Remember, you must move forward. You need to take a break before starting a new relationship. End the relationship and give yourself some time to get over the person. Perhaps someday in a year or more you will be able to start communicating again and even become friends. But now you need a break and complete indifference in each other’s lives.
      • If you have mutual friends, tell them about the breakup. Be sure to draw their attention to the fact that you will communicate as before, even if your ex-boyfriend (girlfriend) is in the company. They don't have to pick a "side."

   2. Give yourself some time to get over your past relationship. Of course, the breakup was your initiative, but this does not mean that you will not be at least a little hurt. The initiator of the breakup very often experiences the breakup as hard as his partner. In some cases, it is even more difficult for the initiator of the breakup because it was he who caused pain to his partner; he is tormented by a feeling of guilt, even if he knows that this was the only way out of the situation.

      • After a breakup, you will need some time to recover. Think about what you are going to do next in life, how you are going to behave, what you are going to do.
      • It's completely normal to spend a couple of weeks depressed, writing in your diary, listening to sad music, looking at photos of you together. But time passes, try to calm down and start over from scratch.
      • Talk to a friend or boyfriend about this. Do not rush to go all out with alcohol and casual acquaintances - this can lead to consequences that you will later regret.

   3. Learn to enjoy life again. After a few weeks or months, the pain will begin to subside. It is best to try to avoid meeting with your ex-boyfriend (girlfriend) during this period. Over time, you will begin to feel better, start connecting with friends and family, and find new hobbies.

      • If you want to quickly get out of the habit of your past relationship, try not to visit places where you and your ex-boyfriend (girlfriend) often walked, try for some time not to do anything that you would associate with the past.
      • Make a few changes in your life. Buy new furniture, rearrange, find a new hobby, sign up for volleyball or art classes.
      • Do not try to immediately find yourself a new young man (girlfriend). First you need to wean yourself from old relationships and prepare yourself for something new.
   • If you have decided everything, be honest and speak clearly and firmly so that your ex-boyfriend (girlfriend) does not think that you will return soon.
   • Don't try to start an argument or showdown after a breakup. Wait for your partner to come to his senses.
   • Don't ignore someone before ending a relationship. If you want to end the relationship, say so right away.
   • As mentioned above, try not to communicate for a while. Give the person time; you should not immediately appear in front of his eyes with a new lover (beloved). Wait at least a week (though it depends more on how long you've been dating). If you have been together for about a year or more, the breakup will be quite painful, in which case you should not try to “wipe your partner’s nose.” If you're about to jump into a new relationship right away, try to avoid going to places you went to with your ex. Try to leave in the past as many places and objects as possible that you somehow associate with past relationships. This behavior will show your respect for your ex-boyfriend.
   • Don't end the relationship immediately after a date or sex - this is very selfish and will greatly hurt your partner.

One day a feeling comes that the relationship has outlived its usefulness, and we begin to look for ways to break off the relationship with a man. Someone chooses not to answer the phone and ignore the flow of SMS messages. Someone finds strength in himself and explains for a long time and painfully to his once loved one why there will no longer be long evenings together, beautiful declarations of love and general happiness. It is difficult to say who has a more difficult time in this case - the one with whom the relationship is broken or the one who takes this difficult step.

How to break off a relationship with a man you don't love

If you have firmly decided that the relationship can no longer be continued, that you and your life partner are completely unsuitable for each other, you should not continue to be together out of feelings of pity and compassion. Being next to a person you don’t love will not only torment you. That is why you need to make a decision to end the relationship as quickly as possible.

Way. For the honest

You arrange a farewell dinner (breakfast, lunch) and talk about your decision. Dry, reasoned and without unnecessary emotions. The phrase “we’d ​​better break up” should be rehearsed in front of the mirror in advance so that at the moment of parting, under the influence of surging emotions, you don’t do anything stupid and change your decision. You can give a parting gift, or if you received an expensive gift from your significant other, ask if it’s time to return it.

What you should not do: you should not stoop to mutual reproaches and insult the dignity of the person with whom you are breaking up. Don't list his entire list of shortcomings. Don’t try to talk about how good he is and how much you will miss such a wonderful person in your life. Don’t become a parody of the joke “you’re so wonderful, I don’t know how I’ll manage without you, but starting tomorrow I’ll try.”

Way. For the cowardly

We write a letter (regular, email or SMS). Under no circumstances do we send messages via ICQ or other forms of chat in which it is possible to start a dialogue. Your goal is simply to convey to the recipient the information that you are no longer together. The letter may contain general phrases about what your relationship gave you, what you learned from this person. You can simply thank him for being in your life.

Way. For the deceived

Sometimes we don’t want to part with a person, but life circumstances and the information we receive from a loved one become an argument for separation. Betrayal, an insult that we can never forgive, or just a blatant lie. Few people can simply accept that their loved one could do this to them. The time has come to decide what to do in such a situation and how to break off the relationship in order to free yourself from the emotions that have washed over you.

You need to formulate as clearly as possible what doesn’t suit you in the relationship and what you will never be able to forgive, even to a person very close to you. You shouldn’t stoop to threats like “I’ll never forgive”, “I’ll remember”, “you’ll regret it”. It is worth being softer and showing tolerance and honesty in such a situation instead of threats and blackmail. “I can’t understand why it was possible to do this,” “I can’t live anymore with a person who is deceiving me,” and “I didn’t expect such an act from you” sound much more humane even in relation to the person who committed an ugly act.

After you have expressed to your partner everything that has accumulated in you, do not stay in the same room, leave. This is necessary for both you and the person you are breaking up with. There is no need to torment a once loved one, there is no need to give hope that everything can still be returned.

You have decided to leave a man with whom your relationship has no future. Now it is important to bring the matter to the end, without letting it go to chance. This is an emergency situation, and in it you need to stick to a plan, just like in a fire you focus on an evacuation plan. Think through your care plan down to the smallest detail.

If you carefully develop a behavior strategy, you can easily bypass the traps that your man has set to keep you. Then he will not be able to manipulate you and will not force you to change your mind at the last minute if you hesitate to break off relations with him.

How to tell a man about a breakup

In order for everything to happen with the least emotional cost, you must follow a number of rules:

First of all, you need to decide whether a break is really necessary. It is quite possible that the differences are temporary and surmountable. If the problem arises not for the first time and it cannot be solved, then it is better to end the relationship. If there are still doubts about the correctness of the decision, you can visit a psychologist or consult with a good friend.

Often a decisive conversation, in which one of the parties planned to put an end to the relationship, drags on and goes in a completely different direction. Therefore, it is worth limiting its duration in advance by scheduling a meeting at a scheduled time. However, you should understand that if the relationship lasted more than a year, then it will not be possible to explain in less than an hour.

No matter how difficult it is, you only need to talk about your decision in person, and face to face. Under no circumstances should you use ICQ, email or telephone - this is a manifestation of cowardice. In addition, the information obtained in this way will be much more difficult for the abandoned person to “digest.” If the couple does not live together, it is ideal if the breakup occurs on the territory of the “half” that they decided to leave. A familiar environment will help you recover from shock faster and behave more confidently.

Before you break off a relationship, you should prepare. Firstly, as mentioned above, you need to understand for yourself that this is the only possible way out. Secondly, it is necessary to prepare weighty arguments that fully explain why the decision was made to part with the partner.

Having communicated your decision, you need to be prepared for non-standard reactions:

• Tears. This is how women usually react. Crying and hysterics are the most common way to influence a man in an unusual situation;
• Arguments. This is already the prerogative of men. However, having made a firm decision, you should under no circumstances succumb to other people’s arguments.
• Threats. This is a manifestation of bad manners and lack of restraint. You shouldn’t react to such attacks; the best way is to stop the conversation and leave.

Psychology of breaking up relationships

It is worth thinking through the conversation scenario: what exactly and how you are going to say. No matter how much of a loser you think he is, he has his own reasons for continuing the relationship and therefore making you change your mind.

His reaction could be as follows:

He will criticize all your arguments and will try to prove them untenable.

He will convince you of an incorrect assessment of the situation, and will put all the blame on you for the discord in your relationship. He will swear that everything will work out if you give him another chance. By clearly understanding what exactly you will be talking about, you will not get involved in endless explanations, self-justifications and other “charms” that can lead you astray. The Do's and Don'ts list on pages 80-81 will help you plan your conversation.

Try to realistically assess the outcome of the meeting, especially if this is not the first time you are trying to break off a relationship with a man. Of course, a face-to-face conversation is more honest, but if you are not sure that you can cope with your emotions, withstand his response, or are simply afraid of falling under his influence, send him a letter or text message.

If you understand that you can only break up with a guy in absentia, without making an appointment, do just that - it’s better than complete inaction.

You NEED to focus on yourself. If you talk about how you feel rather than how he acts, he will be less likely to hang on to his words. For example, say: “I’m very upset when you don’t come on a date” - instead of: “You’re always somewhere, just not with me!”

If a breakup occurs on the initiative of a woman, you NEED to be firm. Naturally, you want to embellish some moments, round off sharp corners, so that both feel comfortable. But if you don't speak directly, he will smash your arguments to smithereens.

You NEED to write a script and rehearse it several times. This will allow you to maintain control of the situation during the conversation.

If your partner interrupts, you can insist that he listen to the end.

If you decide to break off the relationship, then you CANNOT blame the man. Both of you are responsible for the relationship. You had your reasons for dating him, and so did he. Mutual accusations will lead to a dead end.

DO NOT lump all claims together. Talk only about the main thing.

You CANNOT enter into a dialogue that leads nowhere. Pointless discussion can undermine your resolve.

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT, SO DON'T deviate from your intended path and don't make excuses.

Very often, relationships with a person turn into attachment. This is not the best scenario for the development of love, which can be compared to a self-made prison, because such a person makes himself dependent.

Unhealthy relationships and attachments cause you to stay close to those who hurt us. Very often such relationships are accompanied by a strange feeling that you are giving everything to the person, but are not receiving anything in return.

It can be very difficult to break such relationships, because addiction in any sense of the word is a type of illness. No one is immune from such problems, but there are no people who could not overcome all this.

How to become a free person

Step one: relationship analysis. Love means not being overly affectionate, controlling or harsh. Think about whether there are hints of any of the above in your love? Pay attention to yourself and your partner. Try to be impartial when determining the source of problems. If this is you, then work on yourself, but if this is your soulmate, then you will have to try to refuse such love.

Step two: The second step is what psychologists call a trial break. Your task will be to reject exaggerations and accept the truth. Look at everything with the sober eyes of an outsider. If there is even a hint of flaws and problems, then this is a serious reason to think about it.

A trial break, because it is not always possible to get away from your attachments the first time. First, give up everything that makes you look at the world drunkenly: drugs, other bad habits. Next, surround yourself with positivity. This can be expressed both in the people you communicate with and in the hobbies that interest you. Set an important goal for yourself and go towards it.

Step three: acceptance of independence. To make your life easier, be prepared for the following:

• you may meet this person in the future - don’t ever dismiss it;
• depression can come into your life. It is quite possible to cope with it - for this, do not forget about the second step and its specific moments;
• you will need to take care of yourself. Choose an interesting sport, change your image, read a motivating book;
• you will definitely find yourself a new love. Learn from the mistakes of the past and do not repeat the scenario of the past.

The man is not always the first to leave... Nowadays, all relationships in couples have somehow changed, now the man is not always the head of the family, and he has become much less right to be right. Women received all opportunities equal to men. And the opportunity to leave first is no exception.

So what should a woman do if she decides that she would be better off alone? Yes, exactly one. I don’t consider options when a woman leaves for another man, for me it’s impossible. After all, in fact, they are not leaving for someone, but from someone... How can you explain to a man that nothing binds you anymore, that all these relationships are a burden to you, that you have forgotten what happiness is? How not to offend him, because the departure of a woman is very difficult for a man to perceive. And there is no point in delaying the relationship anymore... How to choose the words? How to convey this to a society that will definitely wonder where the other half went?

Breaking up a relationship is never easy. And it doesn’t matter at all whether you left on your own or were abandoned - you will still feel emotional exhaustion. Before ending a relationship, you should carefully weigh the pros and cons. You must have a good reason to leave. However, you should always remember that your ex is the person you once loved. Be honest with him, but not cruel, and also don't leave hope behind. Below you will find tips on how to end a relationship in the least traumatic way.

Method 1 of 3: Preparing for a Breakup

1. Make sure you really want to end the relationship. Don't use the threat of a breakup as a means to achieve your desires. If you say that you have decided to break up, do it, otherwise, immediately take your words back. Before you make a decision, have an honest and open conversation with your partner. Many men and women suffer for years without discussing problems with their partner, and in the end it all leads to separation.

If you decide to break up, make a list of the reasons that you are not happy with in the relationship. And these should be those things that can no longer be corrected.

2. Make a clear-headed decision. Do not make decisions in the heat of rage during a quarrel, and do not blame the relationship for your problems at work (school, family). Before you take this step, consult with friends or parents, people who have their own view of what is going on in your relationship.

If you decide to break up, don't tell everyone around you about it right away. It's okay if you consult with close friends or parents, but once you've made your decision, you should talk to your partner first.

3. Choose the right place and time. Don't break up before an important exam or before going to work. Both of you should have time to digest the information and be alone. It's best to break up on Friday so that your partner can recover at least a little over the weekend.

Don't break up at your favorite restaurant, bar, or favorite spot in the park. Choose a neutral place that means nothing to you.

Choose a time when you will be emotionally relaxed. It's not a good time to break up with your partner if you've just come out of a stressful meeting.

4. Break off the relationship personally (whatever the circumstances). Show respect to your ex-lover(s). You can only end a relationship over the phone if you are in a long-distance relationship and won't see each other for a long time, or if your partner is manipulating and controlling you. If your partner is violent or abusive, it's best to stay away from them.

Method 2 of 3: Breaking up the relationship

1. Be firm in your intention to end the relationship. Communicate this firmly and unwaveringly. If you are indecisive and soft, in the vain hope of softening the gap, you will only hurt the person more. Don't be dramatic. Just calmly and confidently tell the person that you no longer want to build a relationship with him. Be careful not to let the person think that you are talking about a temporary breakup and that you might change your mind after the breakup. That's all, that's all.

You may think that phrases like “I’m just not ready yet” or “Maybe things will work out in the future” will help ease your partner’s pain. However, if you don't really mean it, you'll only make things worse.

2. Be honest, but not cruel. Of course, you don't want your partner to be completely in the dark about the reason for the breakup, but you also don't want to tell him the top 20 things you don't like about him. Simply explain why you want to end the relationship (maybe you feel oppressed or disrespected, or feel manipulated) rather than beating around the bush.
The hardest thing is to explain to someone that you are no longer in love with them, because it is not their fault. But you still have to be honest. Say this as gently and carefully as possible.

After you have named the main reason, you do not have to go into detail and recall old grievances. (Only if the person is not still confused). There is no point in discussing past problems and hurting the person even more.
Don't leave the person feeling worthless and lacking self-confidence. Don’t say “I just need a real man”, rather say “I think you still need to work on your self-confidence.”

Whatever the reason, it should not take a person by surprise. If you try to talk through problems with your partner, you may not be faced with such a difficult decision.

Try to avoid a long list of reasons why you want to leave someone. Stop at the main reason: “We are too different,” “I don’t feel support from you on my life path, but I don’t want to change this path,” “I want children, but you don’t,” or something like that.

3. Be prepared for negative reactions. The reaction can be different: anger, shock, surprise, panic. If a person is angry, try to remain calm and reassure your partner. Speak quietly, even if the person is screaming. If things start to get out of hand, simply walk away and let the person cool down, but reassure them that you will return when they have calmed down. Don't say, “Okay, forget it. I went/went.”

Reassure the person if necessary, but don't go too far. You don't want to go down a path that will lead you to the same result again. Be sympathetic but firm and try to cut off all contact after a breakup.

If you are afraid of leaving a person alone, call his/her relative or friend, tell him everything, tell him where your ex-partner is, express your concern and ask if the friend/sister/etc. be with her/him. Apologize for the inconvenience and thank you for your help. After this, also disconnect all contacts.

If your ex-partner is angry and there is no point in explaining anything to him/her, simply say: “Yelling at each other will not change anything. I made my decisions and I won't change them, but I can talk to you if you calm down. Cool down, and then call me and we’ll discuss everything again.” If he/she calls back, keep your promise and answer the call. Answer all questions honestly and calmly and end the conversation to avoid prolonging the pain.

4. Set clear boundaries for your future communication. Make it clear that you will not change your mind. It is best to cut off all contact so as not to give him/her a chance to discuss what went wrong. Consider failed relationships as valuable experience for the future. Think about what you were able to learn and what type of people you should avoid.

If you have mutual friends and don't want to interfere with each other, try to see them separately.

If you both have a favorite coffee shop or fitness club, try to create a schedule so as not to overlap. This is not necessary, but it will help you avoid unnecessary pain from constant meetings.

If you lived together or you still have each other's things, try to take them immediately so as not to see each other in the future.

5. Leaving means leaving. The biggest mistake at the end of a relationship is giving it its last breath. And one more. And further. And further. This is already a waste of time.

When you notice that the discussion revolves around one point and does not lead to any solution, stop and leave.
If the person doesn't understand why you're leaving them, write them a letter or email explaining it. Say everything you wanted to say, let the other person explain, and leave it at that. Sometimes it’s easier to solve everything while being at a distance from each other.

Method 3 of 3: Life after a breakup

1. Don't try to become friends right away. Trying to remain friends will only prolong the pain. Most often, it is better to break all contacts and not intersect. Over time, after 3 months or a year, when you see each other, the pain will subside and you can try to become friends from scratch. But even then, treat your ex with respect; he or she may need more time to come to their senses.

If your ex asks, “Can we stay friends?” answer, “No, I don't think we should talk for a while.” After the final decision is announced, break all contacts.

If you have mutual friends, tell them about the breakup and warn them that you don't want to be in a place where your ex will be present. And if it gets to the point where they have to pick sides, so be it.

2. You will need time to cope with the loss. Even if you initiated the breakup, you probably won't want to spend the evening hanging out on the town celebrating your new freedom. People do not always understand that the initiator of the separation suffers no less than the one who was abandoned. And sometimes even more, because the feeling of pain is mixed with a feeling of guilt, even if the person knows that he did the right thing.

After breaking up, reconsider your views on life and think. What in the future can make you happy?

It's okay if you spend the first two weeks crying in bed or pouring your heart out in your journal. Over time, everything will return to normal and the world will sparkle with bright colors again.

Call your best friend to feel better. However, going to a club with guys to forget about it right after a breakup is not a good idea.

3. Enjoy your life after the relationship. In a few weeks, or even months, you will be able to enjoy life again. Now that you have separated things and learned to avoid each other, the recovery process will go faster. Once you find yourself again, start enjoying being with your friends or family. Return to your previous interests. And also get new ones.

If you want to bounce back faster, don't do the things you used to do with your ex, whether that's rock climbing or drinking at happy hour.

Make some changes. Try something new, switch things up, do something you haven't done before.
Slowly start going on dates again. However, don't enter into a new relationship if you're not ready yet. A breakup does not mean that you are ready to immediately rush headlong into a new pool.

Don't play games or ignore someone before you've broken up with them. If you want to end everything, sooner or later you have to do it.

Try not to blame the person or be aggressive. If necessary, wait until everyone has calmed down and start talking about the breakup.

It's better to break up than to be in a painful relationship.

Don't break up with a person after sex. It's selfish and cruel.

Be decisive and honest from the beginning so that the person does not think that you can return to him over time.

Don't go on dates in the first week, or even month, after a breakup. Unless you want the person to hate you or ruin your reputation.

Spend some time apart. Give the person time to deal with this before you start seeing other people. Usually a week is enough, but it all depends on how serious your relationship was and how long it lasted. If you're dating again, take your new partner to places you haven't been with your ex.

How to end a relationship: warnings

Don't back down, even if your partner cries. Remember what he/she is going through right now.

Don't give hope that everything can be returned. If you decide to move on, you must make this clear. If everything can still be fixed, don’t break up. Instead, focus on how you can change things for the better. Don't use the breakup as a ploy to intimidate or get your way.

In general, never send a letter - do it in person. Don't be a jerk unless there is some danger from your partner.

Don’t say: “It’s not about you, it’s about me.” Many people interpret this as: “I won’t tell you the real reason, but it’s all about you and I don’t have the courage to admit it.”

Never place all responsibility for a breakup on another person.

We hope that these tips on how to break up a relationship and how to break up correctly will help you get away from unnecessary relationships without traumatizing the psyche of either yours or your ex-partner. Good luck to you on the love front.
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