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Test whether you are a good or bad person. How to find out what kind of person I am

Incredible facts

Can you imagine a world in which there is no deception? It is unlikely that anyone will have enough imagination to realize how much we will lose or how much we will gain if we stop lying to each other. The man is lying every day, so the skills of bringing an interlocutor to clean water will be useful to everyone.

Moreover, each of us has once made mistakes about people. At such moments, we think about how it was possible not to immediately notice that the person is unreliable and cannot be relied on. And it also happens that we simply cannot find a common language with someone because we did not bother to observe the person in order to create his portrait.

But how do you really get to know a person? Colleague, potential partner, friend? There are a lot of articles on the Internet like “ask these questions to really get to know a person.” But how do you imagine this? Do you sit a person in front of you and start interrogating them? Not many people will agree to this.

The other extreme is to believe that a person can only be known over a long period of time. However, coach John Alex Clark is confident that the key in this matter is not time, but observation and the ability to connect the information received into one chain.

There are several very simple and at the same time powerful techniques that will help you identify patterns in a person’s behavior and learn about his character. Let's talk about them.

How to recognize a person

1. Notice the details

Every day a person performs a huge number of routine actions: buying food, traveling in public transport, talking on the phone, etc. A person's actions can shed light on his personality and also help predict how he will behave in a given situation.

Example A. If a person chooses the same dish in a cafe every day, then he probably avoids change and does not like the state of uncertainty. Such people can be faithful and devoted spouses. But on the other hand, it will be extremely difficult to convince him to make risky investments or move to another country.

Example B. People who enjoy gambling and other risky activities are more likely to take risks in other areas of their lives. For example, such a person may quit his job without finding another one and without thinking about financial security during unemployment.

Example B. A person who always looks both ways when crossing the road is likely to be prudent and cautious. He will carefully consider every detail before making any decision, and will only take well-calculated risks.

That is, if you analyze a person’s actions in one area, you will be able to understand how he will behave in other areas.

2. Pay attention to how the person communicates

How does your interlocutor behave in communication? Does he try to build relationships with each person, or does he single out those who are close to him in spirit, and holds the rest at arm’s length? Does he talk without a clear plan, on a whim, focusing on impressions, or does he constantly analyze, try to be objective and do not trust his intuition?

Is a person more of a thinker, relying on concepts, images, diagrams and ideas, or is he more of a practitioner, living in a world of measurable quantities, tasks and facts? If you observe everyday words and behavior, you will be able to trace a general line.

3. Talk to the person about relationships with mutual friends and contacts at work.

Many people believe that gossip is an empty activity, devoid of any meaning. However, the main thing in this matter is what qualities the interlocutor gives to other people, how he explains their behavior. Often, when we talk about other people, we unconsciously notice what is present in ourselves.

These conversations will help us understand what we value in the people around us, who we want to be like, and also what we want to change in ourselves. The more we say that others are emotionally stable, happy, kind-hearted, or polite, the more likely we are to have these characteristics ourselves.

If a person says about another that he is pretending to dig a hole for someone, then this may mean that such a person is calculating and builds only relationships built on momentary gain.

4. Probe existing boundaries

When a person wants to build a relationship, he sees the good and ignores the bad. However, sooner or later, the illusions will still dissipate, and the person will appear before you in all his glory. A person who knows how to communicate correctly will, first of all, look not for the good in his interlocutor, but for his boundaries.

If the opponent is nice, where does the niceness end? He wants to help, but where does this desire stop? If he is sincere, then when will it start to get dark? Until what point is he tolerant of his subordinates’ mistakes? Are you honest with your clients? What if we are talking about a sum with a lot of zeros?

Adequate, sober-minded, understanding, reasonable? Where is his limit, beyond which he turns into a madman?

5. Pay attention to the person’s behavior in a critical situation

When force majeure happens, a person shows himself in all his glory, he simply cannot play or be disingenuous. He doesn’t have time to put on a mask, so he begins to behave as his instincts want.

How to really know a person

6. Pay attention to his attitude towards the service staff

People whose life has been unfair, in their own opinion, have a habit of taking it out on the service staff. Sellers, waiters, cleaners - everyone gets it. If your interlocutor calls the waiter by snapping his fingers or whistling, then this is the first sign that the person is, at a minimum, poorly brought up with all that that implies.

7. Observe intonation and body language

There is a lot of information on the Internet about body language. Liars are recognized by certain signs: they pause in the conversation, change the topic of the conversation, begin to make excuses even if there is no reproach, look away when answering a question, and often touch their face.

" It talks about a world in which no one could lie. One day, something broke in the brain of one inhabitant of this world, and he uttered his first lie. In order not to spoil the impression of the film, I will not say further and I advise you to watch it to learn about how our world could look without lies.

And since in the real world there are more than enough lies and deceit, here are a few ways to deal with them and bring a person you don’t trust to light.

Observe a person in a critical situation

When a person has to act in a critical situation, he cannot dissemble or play. He does not have the ability to use masks, and he will most likely act as his instincts dictate.

People who have been offended by life most often take it out on the service staff. Waiters, cleaners, salespeople - they all get it. If a person whistles or snaps his fingers at the waiter, this is the first sign that your interlocutor is an idiot.

Watch your body language and intonation

It's not difficult to find. Liars can be recognized by several signs:

Pauses in conversation.
Averting your eyes when answering a question.
Changing the topic of conversation.
They make excuses even when you don’t reproach them.
Faces are often touched.

Of course, you shouldn’t overdo it and follow every gesture of your interlocutor. But sometimes this little cheat sheet helps clear things up.

Gossip about mutual friends

We love gossip to a greater or lesser extent. And, unfortunately, we often do not know the extent of them. By gossiping about mutual friends, you will see with your own eyes how much crap can come out of a seemingly good person.

Lend or borrow money

And although we have already said that this is the last thing you should think about, but by borrowing or lending money to a person, you can learn a lot of new things about him.

Go on a trip together

Extreme way. If you are already thinking about how to bring a person to clean water, then going on a trip with him is not the best idea. But after spending some time alone, you will see all his cockroaches.

Tell me a secret

Telling a secret will test a person's ability to keep secrets. If you don't trust him, you can tell him a trivial secret or a made-up secret, just to see if he will rush to retell it further.

Have there been situations in your life when you needed to understand what a person really is like? What did you do?

The peel is the first impression of you. This is what everyone knows about you, from the barista who sold you coffee this morning to an unfamiliar colleague at work. How do you know what it tastes like to you? It is not difficult. Remember whether you are polite to waiters, salespeople, and taxi drivers. Do people like you when they first meet you? Would your unfamiliar colleagues call you friendly? If you confidently answer “yes” to all these questions, then rest assured, your skin tastes quite good.

Now let's dig deeper. Pulp. Friends, family, those who know you well, everyone deals with it. Do you gossip often? Do you judge people? Don't stand up for your loved ones? Are you cowardly? Do you rejoice at your friends' failures? Do you like to talk only about yourself? Can't keep secrets? Don't pay back your debts? Don't mind telling a lie from time to time? If yes, then your pulp, alas, is no good.

Now we have reached the core. You reveal it only to those closest to you, but some people don’t show it to anyone at all. Test yourself: imagine that there is a button next to you that you can press, and then your cherished dream will come true. True, about 1000 random people in the world will die at the same time. But no one will ever know that you pressed it. Will you press? If your answer is yes, your core is hopelessly damaged.

If you divide a person into skin, pulp and core, and each of these three parts is called “bad” or “good,” you get eight types of people. Let's figure out what these types are (going from peel to core).

Good-good-good

Saints to the core, who do not lose faith even in notorious villains. Most often they make friends among the “bad-good-good”.

Advantages: Without such people we would definitely be lost, and if we need to trust someone, then only them, they will not let us down.

Flaws: With their arrival, the fun goes away, because what is fun is not always right.

Bad-good-good

When you first meet them, they make a terrible impression, but dig a little deeper and their beautiful inner world will open up to you. People in the “good-good-good” series like to hang out with these people.

Advantages: They hate hypocrisy and cowardice, they are extremely principled. People respect them and often choose them as their leaders.

Flaws: Some of them are no strangers to star fever, because inside they are so wonderful, despite the outer shell.

Good-bad-good

At the first meeting they seem charming, but their friends, most of them the same “good-bad-good”, know that this is far from the case. “Good-bad-good” people often suffer from low self-esteem.

Advantages: It’s always fun to be with them, and in general their communication skills are at the highest level.

Flaws: They can be hypocritical and cowardly, but, in general, they are harmless.

Bad-bad-good

The list of those they have wronged is long, but their friends will always defend them fiercely. And they are mostly friends with people like them, either with “good-bad-good”, or with completely “bad” people.

Advantages: Of course, they can be very unpleasant, but they have a good heart.

Flaws: They can be very unpleasant.

Good-good-bad

Such people are very dangerous, first you like them, gain your trust and even love, and then mercilessly break your hearts. They often agree with “good-good-good”, and then very painfully diverge from them.

Advantages: Of course, their main goal is only their own success, but while they are moving towards this goal, they manage to do something good, such people often go into politics.

Flaws: They are manipulators and hurt those closest to them the most.

Bad-good-bad

This type of people is very rare. They are often deluded into thinking that their core is actually good.

Advantages: They often become successful in the criminal business. A bad skin produces the necessary intimidating effect, good flesh helps to establish contacts, and a bad core allows you to go over your head to your own goal.

Flaws: They are really very bad.