What to do if you fall in love with a married man? What to do. Features of the behavior of a married partner

Romance, secret meetings, passionate sex. And then a painful expectation, jealousy, tears in the pillow. And there is practically no hope that the beloved man will move to you forever. So a woman fell in love with a married man. What to do in such a situation?

Leave everything as it is, enjoying fleeting meetings? Trying to divorce him from his wife and find personal happiness? Break off a painful relationship and look for a new love? Being the mistress of a married man is not the best and not the easiest fate for a woman. And many made a vow to themselves that they would never repeat such a mistake again. But not everyone succeeds. There is a type of woman who falls in love with married men again and again.

What is it, karma? A crown of celibacy? How easy it is to explain your own actions with such things. And convenient, isn't it? But in fact, women themselves plunge themselves into these painful experiences. Why painful? Yes, because the beloved, although near, does not belong to the woman. In order to understand this situation and understand what to do next, you need to know all the subtleties of this delicate issue - an affair with a married man.

Young girls in danger

Most often, young immature girls fall into the network of married men. Perhaps in their chosen one they see a father, whom they missed so much in life. Or maybe they were turned to the head by an adult man, giving gifts and compliments.

Men are attracted by the youth and inexperience of young girls. With them, they feel younger, full of strength and youthful recklessness. But at the same time, they feel more confident - a kind of brutal man. They set out to mold from a young girlfriend the image that will satisfy all their requirements.

The first few months can be just perfect. But only at first glance. Judge for yourself - a woman falls in love, with all the ensuing consequences. But instead of complete and undivided attention, rare calls, hasty dates are obtained. She is deprived of even the simplest, but such pleasant little things - to write her favorite SMS or just call when she wants. And do not convulsively wonder if your wife will be nearby. Holidays alone, alone in the evenings. Sooner or later, a woman loses her peace of mind and falls into despair, not knowing what to do next.

Often such a "psychological breakdown" is very, very dangerous for women. From a young age, they get used to the idea that their destiny is second place, that the joys of fleeting meetings are sufficient for their happiness. Well, if a young girl, taught by bitter experience, no longer falls for such a bait. Otherwise, she can spend her whole life on those who see in her only an alternate airfield.

Mistress as entertainment for a woman

Some psychologists believe that women have an affair with a married man if they are afraid of the responsibility of family relationships. They like the adrenaline that secret meetings give, excites the very "illegality". “I need it like air,” they say. In order to understand whether this is really so, answer honestly the question: what will you do if he decides to stay with you, divorces his wife and marries you? Will the charm of novelty, the joy of relationships, disappear?

Perhaps your love for a married man is just a game, a remedy for boredom. In this case, you should seriously think about it: are you ready to exchange your youth for unnecessary relationships, or is it time to start building your family? Lack of responsibility is addictive. And in the event of a break with one "married man", you can fall into the same networks again and again to fall in love with a married man.

Fear of being alone

Many women over the age of 30 find it difficult to find the right man. By that time, most worthy candidates have already created their own families, while others are most often not satisfied. The chance to become attached to the soul of someone else's husband is quite large.

Lonely mature women find solace in relationships that somehow fill their spiritual emptiness. With their minds, they understand what pain they cause to the family of their chosen one, but the feeling of self-preservation takes over. At least a little, at least a couple of years - but to feel needed and desired.

Imagine that you are very hungry. But, for some reason, you consider normal food impossible for yourself. So you drink water in an attempt to quench your hunger. For a while, hunger subsides, but after a while you want to eat again. So it is with the man who is bound by obligations to another family. No matter how often you take it at home, the feeling of spiritual hunger does not disappear, it flares up with renewed vigor, as soon as it goes beyond the threshold. After all, water will never replace normal food.

In order to prolong the relationship and keep this man near you, you find many ways to tie him to you. This is great sex, and attention to his problems, affection and tenderness. Perhaps if he were your husband, you would not give him even half, but in war, as in war. Your spiritual hunger is so strong that the need to satiate wins over all moral principles and pity for his family.

What awaits these unfortunate women? An eternal lover is a sad sight. Alone all my life, no kids. Lonely holidays, sad weekends - these are the days married men prefer to spend with their families. Remember the movie "Winter Cherry"? His heroine suffered from loneliness and pain for years. So is it worth repeating other people's mistakes? Ask yourself the question - what awaits me in the future?

Why do men need it?

Men who seek meetings on the side rarely feel remorse. They justify their behavior by saying that they are simply tired of everyday problems, they are bored with home sex, they deserve a break from their usual life. Moreover, the main reassurance is that they are not going to leave their wife and children.

Sexual relations with a single woman are rare among men. The conquest of new representatives of the fair sex is a kind of self-affirmation, proof of their leadership and obvious masculinity.

Coming to you, they again feel like sexy macho, romantic heroes. And your desire to keep him and avoid quarrels makes the relationship with you very comfortable. Subconsciously, men are well aware that it is worth creating a real family with you, the same problems will appear as with your wife.

At home, he has a cozy familiar apartment, an established life. It is not known where to move and start all over again - few people like such a prospect. So what's the point of ruining an old relationship for you? Men will always find a thousand and one reasons why they can not leave the family and in the end never marry you.

Often men explain to their mistress that they do not want to leave the family by the fact that they have children. At first, they are worried that the child is still small, and they cannot leave him without a father. Then the child goes to school and he needs the care and control of both parents. Later, adolescence will begin, which can break the unstable psyche of the child. Then his son or daughter learns to build their own relationships and they do not need a bad example.

Maybe when your grandchildren grow up... But by that time you will not only have your own grandchildren, but also a normal family. Guarding someone else's happiness for years, you can remain a lonely and unhappy woman for life. While your girlfriends are babysitting their own babies, you will run around the children's stores buying toys for his child. Is any, even the strongest love, worth such sacrifices?

By the way, if a man leaves his family with a child, he will have to pay alimony. You will be surprised how many men do not get divorced for this reason alone.

Imaginary fidelity

Sometimes a woman sincerely believes the words of her lover that he does not sleep with his wife, but only with her. This spurs her desire to continue a relationship with him. If the spouse is not sick with a serious illness that prevents her from having sex (and this is unlikely), then your man is lying.

Any woman should be sure that she is the only one for her partner. A man knows the rules of this game very well: at home he swears allegiance to his wife, and tells you that he sleeps only with you. Surely he combines sex with two women and gets great pleasure from it.

Well, if you fell in love with a married man, then the fate of picking up crumbs from someone else's table is inevitable. No matter how much you assure yourself that he loves only you, perhaps his body has not yet cooled down from the caresses of another woman. And you won't be able to change anything.

The image of a caring husband

If your lover has already built a successful career before meeting you, then this is another argument in favor of not leaving your family. It is known that in the eyes of the public, a man who left his wife and child for the sake of his mistress does not inspire confidence. That's the way people are.

We are not talking about people from show business, just such relationships are the norm there. But if a man is a politician or a successful businessman, he will do his best to maintain the position of a loving and caring spouse. And for this, no rash steps can be taken.

He will try to hide your existence in any way, and there can be no question of creating a new family hearth. A woman who fell in love with a married careerist should be ready for loneliness. No matter how touching the lover treats her, he will never jeopardize his hard-earned career.

And what to do?

What to do if you fall in love with a married man? First of all, think about yourself. If you are ready to be a rescue buoy, a temporary shelter, an alternate airfield, then you do not value yourself. Don't you want a normal family, so that your husband comes to you every day from work, takes care of you during pregnancy, raises children with you?

Every woman, from a very young age, dreams of a white wedding dress, a beautiful wedding, a long and happy married life. If you do not dare to break off a vicious relationship, then your dream may not come true. After all, it is hardly possible to achieve something if you do nothing.

Even if you manage to insist on your own and a man leaves his family for you, you will make three people unhappy at once. A wife who will suffer greatly. A man tormented by remorse. You - all the experiences of a lover will be written on the face. Moreover, in eighty cases out of a hundred, husbands still return to their ex-wives after a few years - too much connects them with them.

Are you ready for such experiences? Isn't it easier to let go of a man and start living your own, full life? Of course, it is difficult to step over your feelings, but after an illness, healing will surely come.

There is an ancient legend about King Solomon. The wise King Solomon lived in the world and he wore a ring on his hand with an engraving “everything passes”. Whatever trouble happened, he looked at the wise inscription, and anxiety left him, making him stronger and firmer. Once his son died and King Solomon in a rage threw the ring on the ground. Then he noticed another inscription on the inside of the ring: "this too passes."

Be strong and wise. The fact that a woman fell in love with a "busy" man does not make her worse. But the fact that she did not find the strength in herself not to destroy someone else's and her own happiness will give many bitter tears and experiences in the future. Let him go, look around: perhaps your true happiness is somewhere nearby!

Fell in love with a married man... Bite your elbows and sob into your pillow?

Develop a strategy to extract the desired man from the family?

Or enjoy the benefits?

This piquant and very common situation in modern realities has more than one logical resolution.

Everyone knows that cupids pierce the heart without thinking about all the complex ups and downs of the object's life. A heart wounded by love does not always hurt.

But in the case of passion for a person betrothed to another, not only the heart of the lover suffers. All life is ready to fall into the abyss.

Why do we love unavailable men?

• When the one who “fell in love with him married” is under 30, the reason for a rash act may be psychological immaturity and unpreparedness for a full-fledged relationship.

Predilection for feeling with pepper, the desire to play with fate, a pronounced instinct of the Amazon and the predator. When you are under 30, you can quite afford to “make a mistake” and “break wood”.

• Another thing is the age after 30. The same Balzac. It would seem that experience, worldly wisdom, and a sense of dignity have developed enough. An no. The alien soul is darkness, and the female one is the hopeless darkness of transcendental secrets.

After 30, a woman finally realizes her destiny. As well as recognizes all missed opportunities.

Lonely old age looms on the horizon, all worthy candidates have been dismantled. We have to win our place in space and time. You have to give in to your conscience.

The most comfortable situation has the following plot: a married woman fell in love with a married man. On an equal footing. with the same share of responsibility. With a covered back.

The main thing here is to skillfully balance on two fronts and not cause inconvenience to third objects. Such an idealistic combination is not often found. But the equation with a married and lonely young lady in love is one of the most dramatic and, unfortunately, the most popular situations.

What to do?

Decide on a goal. Do you want to “take away” someone else’s husband or do you want to get rid of traumatic relationships and not destroy the usual way of an established family.

It is not worth discussing the morality of the first option for a long time. Everyone has the right to a place under the hot sun of life. And if you are sure that the object of your love is the very ideal man, without whom your life will fade, go for it. Morality and ethics are irrelevant here.

How to "take away"

1. Do not demand a divorce, just create the most comfortable conditions for him next to you.
2. Be a great listener, an unobtrusive adviser, a moderately ardent lover, be interested in and get carried away by his hobby, harmoniously fit into his psychophysical space.
3. Do not criticize - neither his wife, nor himself, generally forget about criticism for the entire period of "withdrawal".
4. In no case do not create an emphasis on the sexual aspect.
5. and manipulate its strengths and weaknesses.

And periodically ask yourself - does the goal correspond to the sacrifices spent?

Is the marriage of this married man really some kind of misunderstanding for both partners? Can you trust a man who abandoned his family? Are you ready to be in the place of an abandoned wife?

Often blinded by love, hormones, dreams, women in love forget about such a difficult reflection. Remember the folk wisdom about someone else's misfortune.

“I fell in love with a married man, what should I do? How to forget him? If a woman is internally aware of the pathological feelings, recognizes the impossibility of changing the situation, agrees with the “sinfulness” of such relationships, the object of love must be excluded from the emotional space.

• Admit it, you hardly really like being an alternate airfield, Vasya in his iPhone and celebrating the New Year alone.
• Is a man who sleeps with two women at the same time worthy of your sacrificial love? Or do you think that a healthy and sexually mature husband just "sleeps" with his wife? Imagine your ideal macho in a real bigamy situation. You are in the harem, and, unfortunately, you are in second place.
• Don't make an idol out of him. God-man - from ancient Greek myths and legends. Your handsome prince in everyday life, and even in the role of your husband, is a completely different substance. Even Mayakovsky recognized the destructive power of everyday life.
• Love yourself. Do not look for compensation in the form of a second half. You are a whole and harmonious person. And a worthy chosen one with this approach will definitely be attracted.

Falling in love with a married man is always a test. It must be overcome with dignity.

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Thank fate for the experience. Turn on self-esteem. And tear through the "pain" this painful connection.

To decide what to do in a situation where a beloved man is married, you need to listen to your feelings and inner voice, weigh the pros and cons. You must be prepared for the fact that you will either have to come to terms with the role of a constant mistress, or fight for your relationship to the end and try to take him away from the family. The most prudent option would be when a woman tries to forget someone else's man and start looking for a more worthy life partner.

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Prospects for such relations

Love can inspire a person, become his inspiration, give vitality and energy, but only if the beloved is single. If the beloved has a lawful wife, then this circumstance cannot but upset and upset the woman. If, having learned the truth about the status of a man, a woman decides to continue a relationship with him, then she should be prepared for the fact that quite often she will have to endure many unpleasant moments:

1. 1. You will have to constantly overcome the feeling of jealousy. Even if a man assures his mistress that his family relationships have long been devoid of spiritual and physical intimacy, it becomes quite difficult to believe in this over time. Especially in those moments when a loved one spends time with children and an official wife.
2. 2. You should tune in to the fact that all holidays, such as New Year, March 8, Valentine's Day, your birthday, the man will spend with his family, and the woman will be left alone. If you are very lucky, then your lover may drop in for an hour, but all this time he will nervously look at his watch and worry about not arousing any suspicion in his wife.
3. 3. It will be necessary to endure constant calls and his conversations with his wife or, possibly, with a child. These people are part of his family, and he will not be able to ignore communication with them. Answering calls, he will have to constantly come up with different reasons for his being late. This may be a protracted meeting with business partners, a big traffic jam on the way home, and other weighty arguments. While all the attempts of the mistress to get through to the man when he is at home will be in vain.
4. 4. Relationships will come with endless restrictions. Meetings can only take place at the woman’s house, it will be possible to call her lover only before the end of working hours, it will be possible to go to a restaurant only in a place where no one knows the couple.

Another thing is if a girl appears in a man's life at the moment when his marriage is bursting at the seams. In this case, all these troubles will be temporary or, if a man is deeply in love, he will immediately leave his wife.

There are three ways out of this situation:

• forget about him and erase him from your life forever;
• go to all possible and impossible to defend their relationship and achieve a divorce from his beloved wife;
• stay as a secret mistress.

In order to make the right choice, you need to soberly think everything over and think not only about yourself, but also about his family, relationships with the child.

What to do if you fell in love

How to forget an unfree man

If a woman has come to terms with the fact that he will never leave her family, or love for someone else's husband turned out to be an unbearable burden, everything possible should be done to forget about his existence. To this end, you need to do some things:

• Break up with a man. He must know about the decision of the woman he loves. If the decision is final, then you should not go on about and agree to the last cup of coffee, give one more chance. A man in this situation must clearly understand that the parting scene is not played out in order to tickle his nerves, but this is the real ending of the relationship.
• Burn all bridges and paths of return. To do this, you need to ignore his phone calls or add him to the "black list" of subscribers, delete the number from the phone's memory, get rid of shared photos and things that remind you of him, do not ask anything about him from mutual friends.
• Give vent to emotions and tears. Immediately after a breakup, you should not pretend to be an iron lady who can easily cope with her feelings. No need to accumulate negative energy within yourself, it must be splashed out. You have to cry as much as you want. You can tell your best friend about the injustice of life several dozen times. It would be useful to go to a qualified specialist whose main area of ​​work is the psychology of family relationships.
• Start life from scratch. It is necessary to clearly realize the fact that after parting, life does not end. This is an occasion for a possible meeting with a worthy young man. You should visit public places in the company of your best friends, buy yourself a thing that you really like. You need to pamper yourself and not refuse anything.



How to fight for your relationship

If a woman has made a choice in the direction of maintaining a relationship at any cost, then in this case the time has come for active action. She needs to push the man to make the final decision. If there is a desire to become the only one for a loved one, then the following steps must be taken:

1. 1. Honestly answer to yourself the question of whether the desire to be with a man is an attempt to assert himself or is it really sincere warm feelings.
2. 2. Adequately assess your chances. Do not openly ask a man when he will leave the family. This wording of the question will drive him into a dead end. He will simply begin to evade an honest answer. In this case, it is necessary to independently set the time frame for waiting for its final decision.
3. 3. Do not make the mistakes of his wife. If he says that he is delighted with the care, affection and tenderness of his beloved, then this is exactly how you should behave in the future. In no case do not swear with him, presenting your claims and discontent.
4. 4. You must carefully monitor your appearance on every date. While a man is not around, you need to take time for your appearance. He should not see any washed-out robes, hair curlers and masks on his face.
5. 5. Make him a little jealous. A man must understand that the light has not converged on him like a wedge and his beloved woman attracts the attention of others. The main thing is not to overdo it in this matter.
6. 6. It is worth thinking and giving yourself an answer to the question of what to do if the time before a divorce can take not only months, but also years, does a woman have a desire to wait so long. It should be borne in mind that if a man has children in marriage, then he will not stop communicating with his ex-wife even after parting.



If a man does not want to change anything

There are times when a loved one cannot, for some reason, leave his family. These can be small children whom he does not want to inflict psychological trauma, financial obligations, joint loans and much more. The situation is aggravated if the beloved is from another city.

It would be logical for a girl to leave her lover alone, but feelings are stronger. In this case, psychologists advise you to follow simple rules that will help you to endure this unpleasant situation more easily, and eventually completely forget about unpromising relationships:

1. 1. The interests of a woman should come first. Although she is not his legal wife, the girl will be able to meet only when she has time and it is convenient for her.
2. 2. No need to become his housekeeper, who diligently prepares dinner for him. A man should take care of the prepared food. Moreover, now there are no problems with the delivery of prepared food to the house.
3. 3. Don't talk to him about his wife. Do not spoil your mood by listening to his stories or complaints about your spouse. For at least a few hours, he should belong only to his mistress.
4. 4. Do not attempt to tell his wife about the relationship with him. You can make sure that the wife finds out about everything. But after such a grand scandal and a break in relations, there are no guarantees that a man will immediately begin to propose. Moreover, he will accuse his mistress of constant scandals with his wife, and no one needs this.
5. 5. Constantly be in search of a more worthy, and most importantly, free candidate for the hand and heart. It should not be forgotten that in almost all cases a married lover is temporary. Don't spend all your time on him. You need to communicate, meet other young people, be the center of attention of other men.

The prospect of relationships, taking into account the sign of the Zodiac

The sign of his zodiac has a great influence on a man's penchant for intrigues and romances on the side:

Zodiac sign	The propensity of a married man to cheat
	If a woman fell in love with a married Aries, then all her attempts to attract his attention or win his heart will be in vain, since the representatives of this sign are exemplary family men and faithful husbands. They can go for treason only when their marriage is really collapsing.
	Taurus does not have a tendency to cheat on his wife. They do not succumb to any temptations if they have a single beloved wife
Twins	Representatives of this zodiac sign are quite loving and will not miss a single beauty. If a lover was born under the sign of Gemini, then a woman should be prepared for the fact that she is not the only one with him. If a man of this sign prefers variety in his sexual life, then he starts an affair with all the girls he likes.
	You can only love a Cancer man with platonic love, since he will not be able to reciprocate the signs of attention of any other woman, except for his wife. Men of this sign in most cases are good family men and do not tolerate betrayal or breakup.
	The most unfaithful husbands are men born under the sign of Leo. They are very fond of beautiful women, so you should not count on the fact that the mistress will be his only muse.
	Virgos are considered the most decent spouses. Not worth the Virgo man. This relationship will end before it even starts.
	Libras are always open to new acquaintances. They are quite soft, but they do not like the gray everyday routine. They are constantly looking for new experiences. The lover should be affectionate and feminine. This will help you fall in love with a Libra man.
Scorpion	Scorpios don't like side flings, as they like stability. They rarely initiate divorces. Relations with a Scorpio lover are doomed to parting
	Don't even try - Sagittarius. Representatives of this sign are faithful and devoted to their spouses. You should try to find a free man of the same zodiac sign
	Capricorns are among those men who tend to lead a double life. It must be borne in mind that representatives of this sign may have several extramarital affairs.
	For married Aquarius, windiness is characteristic. They can quickly fall in love, get married, and after that, already being married, lose their heads again and fall in love. They can easily divorce, but there is no guarantee that he will not do the same with his next wife.
	Pisces men are very responsible for creating a family and choosing their soulmate. They appreciate not only external beauty, but also spiritual support and understanding. A relationship with a Pisces lover is likely to end in nothing.

Relationship between two unfree people

There are times when a woman, being herself married, falls in love with someone else's husband. This can happen for several reasons:

1. 1. A strained, cool relationship with your spouse. If a tense atmosphere constantly dominates in the family, then it is not surprising that a woman tries to find solace in the arms of another man. She will not hesitate to become the mistress of the one who will give her tenderness, care and affection.
2. 2. Lack of attention from the spouse. This may result from the fact that the husband spends too much time with his friends, girlfriends, car. A woman wants to raise her self-esteem and find another man.
3. 3. Revenge for the adultery of her husband. After the faithful cheated, the woman of the subconscious begins to search for another life partner. To forgive betrayal is very difficult and painful, so not every spouse will be able to continue family relationships after betrayal.
4. 4. Dissatisfaction with the intimate life of a married couple. A woman is repelled by her husband's quick sex, the lack of foreplay, surprises and pleasant surprises. She begins to look for someone who can appreciate her sexual temperament.
5. 5. Desire for vivid emotions. Some time after the official marriage, men stop showing their emotions towards their beloved wife. The woman begins to doubt his feelings. Therefore, she begins to look for another man, a relationship with which will be filled with romance.
6. 6. Excessive jealousy of the husband, which is groundless. The husband's endless reproaches and psychological pressure lead to the fact that the woman really starts looking for a lover.

The romance of two not free people usually lasts no more than three years. During this time, there are ups and downs and ups and downs of emotions.

After about a few years, such relationships end in nothing. People begin to understand and realize the importance and value of their legitimate second half, they try to introduce novelty and improve their relationship with each other.

If a married woman has an affair with someone else's husband, then you should try to enjoy these relationships until they bring joy. It is better not to think that someday it will turn out to tie the knot with this man. This will help prevent feelings of bitter disappointment.

If the lover is much older

Many girls fall in love with an adult man much older than themselves. This is embedded in European culture, which claims that a man should be older, wiser.

If a girl fell in love with a man older than herself, then against the background of his wife she will look more advantageous. But it is possible that after a few years of a stormy romance, this man will find himself another younger and prettier lover.

If, nevertheless, a girl fell in love with a married man, then you should think about the following:

• You need to put yourself in the place of his wife. After all, she gave him the best years of his life, gave birth and raised children who miss their dad and are waiting for him. This picture should be presented quite often. Over time, the desire will pass.
• We must try to get to know a person well before it comes to sex. After all, if a crisis really arose in his family relations, then there are good reasons for that.
• You should live your life and think about it as little as possible. You need to walk with friends, expand your horizons, make new acquaintances with the opposite sex.
• No need to impose on your beloved man and try to be away from him. If this does not work out due to objective reasons (for example, he works in the same company), then communication should be minimized. If this does not help, you can ask the authorities to change the schedule so that it is not possible to meet with him every day.
• If you yourself can’t cope with your feelings and emotions, you can turn to a friend, sister, mother, psychologist for help. There is nothing to be ashamed of. It will be better than suffering and eating yourself from the inside.

Being the mistress of a married man is not at all easy, because you have to be in constant tension, accumulate negativity inside yourself. In addition, if a woman loves herself and has an idea of ​​​​family values, she will not allow herself such weakness. You need to learn to respect yourself and other people.

And some secrets...

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He is smart, interesting and caring. It's just a ring on your finger. You didn’t even have time to understand how a small affair turned into a passionate romance, and you fell in love .. RF.

On this topic

Let's leave the moral: "Is this good or bad?" - or something from the series "Put yourself in the place of his wife, what would it be like for you?". First of all, let's look at possible options for the development of such relations: leave everything as it is; try to divorce him from his wife; break off relationships and look for a new love. Think about which of these is the most realistic and whether such a situation suits you. The next step is to figure out what the real reason for such a relationship is. Is it really love or something else?

Why do you need it?

Let's approach this issue with a cool head. Only in this way can the true cause be revealed. Therefore, turn off the “romantic dreams” mode and look at these relationships from the side of psychology. Many girls fall in love with married men, not only because you can’t command your heart. There may be completely different things behind this that do not immediately seem obvious.

self-affirmation

Some women choose married men as partners because they are not confident in themselves. The principle is this: in order to believe in one's own attractiveness, competition with another woman is required. This is such a way of self-affirmation: "He has a woman, and he chose me", "Such an experienced man drew attention to me." Try to imagine another man with a stamp in your passport in the place of your beloved. If it worked out, then this is an occasion to think about whether feelings are so strong and whether they exist at all.

Adrenalin

Sometimes romance with a married man is initiated by those who enjoy adrenaline: secret meetings and the constant feeling that you can be caught together. Answer yourself the question: what will happen if he decides to leave the family for you? Will the exciting feeling caused by the adrenaline rush disappear, and with it everything else?

Fear of a serious relationship

Perhaps, for some reason, a serious relationship scares you, and an affair with a married man is a kind of guarantee of “security”. After all, subconsciously you may feel that these relationships will never become serious. And your fear of strong feelings may simply not be realized. Listen to yourself: if he divorced his wife, would you feel truly happy?

Similarity to father

In such novels, girls may be attracted by the resemblance of the chosen one to the father. Especially when there is a significant age difference. This happens if in childhood a girl felt insecure or lacking a father. An affair with an accomplished man is a way to feel weak and protected.

Why is it for him?

It is important to understand not only your feelings, but also to understand why he needs this relationship.

Sexual fantasy for the captive

It could be his sexual fantasy. Putting it into practice, he feels that he is violating a certain prohibition, and this excites and excites him.

Looking for an emotional connection

Quite often, the cause of this behavior is the weakening of the emotional connection or its absence between him and his wife. He may look for in your relationship, for example, tenderness and care. But this does not mean that his family will fade into the background.

Raises self-esteem

He shows himself from a more favorable side. And, of course, this causes your admiration. A man is always looking for ways to increase his self-esteem, especially if he does not get it at home.

The illusion of choice

Your relationship for him is a way to escape reality. Run away from the comprehension that he is in a certain cage of family ties. This gives him a sense of freedom and that he is still free to make other choices.

« There are so many single guys, but I love a married man", - the words of a famous song involuntarily pop up in my memory.

The situation with falling in love with a married man a man is always ambiguous. How to be?

Some will be reverent accept everything as it is, languish in anticipation of a meeting, tremble in the arms of a loved one, and then shed tears in the pillow, realizing that his departure from the family is a utopian story.

Others, not wanting to share a lover with his wife, will try by all means take him away from the family.

In a word, the fate of a woman, become a lover, not enviable. After all, it’s almost like a disease - it’s impossible to find a worthy among singles, and meetings with married people turn into a vicious circle.

As the saying goes, forbidden fruit is sweet. The paradox of the situation is that absolutely any female person dreams of a beautiful, happy and strong family life.

However, the subject of his adoration chooses inaccessible men.

They cannot make the lady happy and enter into a serious relationship with her due to some life circumstances.

Most often this circumstance is the presence of a wife.

Such cauldrons are not difficult to recognize: they live in another city and in a rare moment they can bestow a meeting, he either appears or disappears again without explanation.

Unpredictable behavior- a sure sign that this man will definitely not open his arms for you.

Then why are some ladies so drawn to inaccessible men?

• Irresistible desire to love and be loved. A woman is ready to adapt to a married lover, if only he was there even for short moments. Sort of "stolen meetings".
• Complexity and the feeling of "victim". Such women believe that it is simply impossible to fall in love with them. They deserve these feelings through suffering and torment. In fact, among such ladies, clever and beautiful women with very low self-esteem are most often found. Therefore, when a married man appears on their horizon, they surround him with excessive guardianship. But due to the inequality of feelings, such relationships do not last long.
• Wish by all means have an object of adoration. At the same time, the most diverse methods and methods for obtaining the desired are used.
• « Not available" a man meets all the requirements of a woman. He is rich, handsome, gallant and courteous. Among those who are surrounded and even now invites down the aisle, such individuals did not come across. Therefore, the fact of the lack of freedom of the inaccessible does not bother a woman at all.
• The prototype of the first love. Love has long passed, but the image has stuck in my head. And especially romantic natures are looking for their first love in every member of the stronger sex.

"Recapturing" a husband from a legal wife is the goal of every self-respecting mistress.

Someone does this to amuse their pride, someone's feelings are so strong that they cannot imagine life without it.

A whirlwind of thoughts according to the “interception plan” sweeps through the head of the homeowner.

As a rule, they all boil down to a few principles:

1. The way to a man's heart is through his stomach.. Definitely, a married man does not come to his mistress in order to eat to satiety. But why not try this method if the semi-finished products of the wife or the always empty refrigerator are already dazzling in the eyes.
2. Atmosphere of calm harmony. Reminiscent of a game of good and bad cop, where the first is the wife, and the role of the good man is up to you. At home there are scandals, eternal claims and discontent. Having provided a man with complete calm, an atmosphere of understanding, you will embark on the right path of conquest.
3. Don't demand anything. Well, at least the first time. The person you love should feel that he is needed not to go to the store for a fur coat and diamonds, but just like that.
4. Unfeigned joy from every meeting. At home, where everything is boring, it is unlikely that he is met with undisguised joy, sometimes the children no longer go out to meet their father. Your sincere feelings will help a man understand that you simply need him.
5. Intimate life with fantasy. No spouse ever allows herself what a mistress can. Take advantage of this moment and remember that 50% of divorces happen because of the sameness in bed.
6. Take an interest in everything that concerns your loved one. After all, it is not uncommon when people in families do not talk at all, and the question of the state of affairs becomes purely formal. Being interested in any little thing will put you in a better position.

Mistress as entertainment for a woman

Sometimes it happens. Sometimes it seems that only a man gets a mistress in order to escape from pressing problems and unload the routine.

But no! Women who do not yet want family relationships or are afraid of responsibility choose the path of a mistress. They are so much more comfortable.

Bright meetings, gifts, passionate nights. The main thing is that it does not bother and does not bother.

No need to wash other people's socks, cook soups with pots, take care of children. At the same time, all the charms of communication with a worthy man are present.

Underwater rocks

But there are always pitfalls. Such a lady is not ready for further decisions if her lover leaves the family or warns that the hour is not even when he will become free.

The psychology of lovers out of boredom is such that they do not want to create a strong union with the subject of entertainment.

At least for now. Sometimes it comes to understanding that it's time to start a family, but with a completely different person.

Imaginary fidelity

sly man to sit right away on two chairs, will try to inspire and wife and mistress that they are the only ones in his life. For example, often to a capricious passion, he says that he has not slept with his wife for a long time. Bluff of pure water. If the wife is healthy, then do not believe such words. .

However, here everything will have to be accepted as is. Unfortunately, you have no right to resent the fact that your lover has sex with another woman.

The fate of a mistress is such that she has to pick up crumbs from someone else's table, while the tidbit goes to his wife and family.

Of course, this is not a question of a man who himself, like a boy, fell in love with his illegal thief.

Husband in the family head. He is her support, financial component. And when a person is successful in addition to everything, then the image of a caring husband is maintained in the best possible way.

Having weight in certain circles, he will never leave the family if he has a thousand women on the side.

So accepted. The family in this case is an indicator of reliability. After all, a divorce can compromise your lover and then your career will fly into hell.

Due to such circumstances, a woman who fell in love with a careerist will have to come to terms with the role of an eternal lover.

What to do: forget or not change anything?

Only the woman herself, who has fallen into the love nets of a married man, can solve this dilemma.

First of all, you need to think about yourself: am I ready to constantly wait, sacrifice myself and is there any point in this.

Every girl from an early age dreams of a beautiful fairy tale and a wedding dress. So is it worth giving up a dream for the sake of someone's hobbies?

There is a wonderful proverb: On someone else's misfortune happiness can not be built". Even if he leaves the family, the euphoria from this will be short-lived.

And remember, you can always be in the place of an abandoned wife.