The bride's godmother at the matchmaking ceremony. Matchmaking by the groom: what to tell the matchmakers, what to take with them? A modern cool scenario for the bride's matchmaking by the groom: words for the groom, the groom's parents, matchmakers, lyrics, ditties, poems, toasts,

In the modern world, the tradition of matchmaking does not play an important role in the marriage of lovers. But before, not a single wedding took place without this ritual. In the old days, matchmaking was the main and most important part of the betrothal of loving hearts. And today, parents of those getting married can meet and get to know each other for the first time only at a wedding. In Rus', for the matchmaking ritual, the groom chose a specific date when he could ask for blessings from the parents of his chosen one. Now no one pays attention to this nuance, and the day of matchmaking is usually scheduled for Saturday or Sunday.

Today, the tradition of matchmaking has an exclusively symbolic meaning, but many couples are trying to revive this ancient custom.

What it is?

Matchmaking is a tradition that dates back to the times of ancient Rus'. According to custom, the groom, together with the matchmakers, must formally propose to the girl, having initially received the consent of her parents for the marriage. This procedure takes place in an intimate setting, among relatives on both sides, without the intervention of strangers.


The matchmakers themselves are relatives from the bride and groom’s side, who are their representatives at this event. In the old days, only the closest relatives were appointed as matchmakers; these could be the boy’s blood parents or godparents. As a last resort, professional matchmakers were invited to play the role of matchmakers. The main task of the matchmakers on the groom's side was to present their ward with the best side. But besides this, they needed to find out more information about the bride’s family, dowry and personal qualities that the girl could keep silent about.


Modern matchmaking involves the groom appearing before the bride's parents with a request to allow the newlyweds to get married. The decision itself, of course, is made by the lovers, but in order to present yourself to the bride’s relatives on the positive side, it is best to use traditions. By the way, these days the groom does not have to come to the relatives of his beloved girl with matchmakers. After some time, the bride's relatives go to the groom's house to make an official acquaintance with the newly-made relatives.


Traditions

In ancient times, special attention was paid to matchmaking. This tradition was a more serious procedure than preparing for a marriage. Basically, the ritual was practiced by the groom, but there were cases when matchmakers went to the guy on behalf of their daughter.


According to the rules of matchmaking, the young man announced that he had found his chosen one and wanted to marry her. In some cases, the groom’s parents themselves selected a suitable bride for their son, explaining that it was time for the guy to start a family. If the groom likes the chosen bride, then the task of the matchmakers is to collect detailed information about the girl herself, her family, what kind of dowry they are entitled to, and much more.


When the choice was approved, representatives of the groom were sent to the girl’s house. If the parents did not approve of their son's choice, they went for advice to experienced matchmakers. To resolve this issue, highly qualified matchmakers offered several unmarried representatives of the fair sex, among whom you can choose.

The matchmaking process itself took place taking into account all the subtleties and nuances. The matchmakers went to the bride's house, waiting for the sun to set. And here you should immediately pay attention that while traveling to the chosen one’s house, the groom’s representatives are not supposed to see anyone, much less talk. Otherwise, the matchmaking procedure may be jinxed. Before crossing the threshold of the future bride's house, the matchmaker must lean against the doorway.


According to Russian traditions, matchmaking had to be carried out on special days of the calendar. For example, during the period of fasting, it is strictly forbidden to ask for blessings from the relatives of your loved one. The number 13, which emanates negative energy, also belongs to the category of forbidden days. After the groom's representatives crossed the threshold of his beloved's house, the fun began. The conversation about the upcoming wedding began from afar. To do this, it was necessary to utter the key phrase: “you have a product, we have a merchant.” Although similar phrases could not be counted in Rus', this formulation was the most popular.


The girl did not take any part in the negotiations between future relatives. She had to be silent, sometimes change her clothes, putting on her best. And my hairstyle changed every time I changed clothes. Sometimes matchmakers wanted to see the bride's skills, for example, how she knits or weaves lace. In this case, the girl presented her own works for public viewing.


In the process of communication, relatives of both sides tried to tell and describe only the most positive qualities of their charges. This list included not only spiritual qualities, but also a material part. By the way, financial responsibility for the well-being of the future family rested entirely on the shoulders of men. The girl was responsible for the calm, beauty, warmth, cleanliness and comfort of the family nest.


Giving a positive answer at the first visit of the matchmakers was considered a rash act. Although there are some exceptions, for example, if the girl was not from a wealthy family or her age crossed the boundaries of acceptable marriage. In these cases, waiting for a second visit from the matchmakers was a stupid decision. But for girls from rich families, choosing a suitable candidate is extremely difficult. The daughter’s opinion may not agree with the opinion of her parents, and constant visits to matchmakers from different men often led to such disagreements.


After making a positive decision, the bride's relatives pay the groom a return visit. They carefully examine the mansions of their future son-in-law in order to understand what conditions their daughter will move into after the marriage. And only after that do conversations about the wedding itself begin. This custom in Russian was called “go to look around”, where the real estate of the future son-in-law was mainly considered.


The positive decision of the bride's parents was expressed in different forms. For example, if they accepted a loaf brought by matchmakers. In fact, in Rus' there were many ways to express consent or refusal without uttering words. The groom's relatives came to woo the bride, expecting a positive answer, but did not always get what they wanted. In case of refusal, the bride's parents gave the matchmakers a watermelon or pumpkin. Sometimes they simply turned us out the door in a rude manner. After these actions, the bride and her relatives became notorious.


After the entire matchmaking ceremony, the matchmaker acquires the official status of a bride. No one could, under any circumstances, approach her, much less try to woo her. Although history is rich in many cases when an engaged girl ran away with her real lover from the hated groom chosen by her parents.

How is matchmaking going these days?

Modern matchmaking is interpreted somewhat more simply, especially for residents of large cities. The groom's matchmakers, or more precisely, his close relatives, very rarely can take advantage of the traditional speeches of custom, and certainly do not organize mass events with theatrical scenes. Only one phrase has survived to this day: “You have a product, we have a merchant.” And yet, modern matchmaking is somewhat reminiscent of an ancient ritual.


Before going to the house of his future wife, a man buys several bouquets of beautiful flowers, which he gives to his mother, sister and grandmother upon arrival. The groom can order a special flower arrangement for the bride herself. Matchmakers who are relatives of the groom should have special gifts with them, for example, sweets in beautiful packaging or a basket of fruit and an elite alcoholic drink. In addition, the groom or his mother must present the bride with a special gift. This could be a necklace or a family heirloom from the future husband's family.


Both of the girl’s parents need to be given something special that will leave a pleasant impression and be preserved for a long time. This nuance is best agreed upon with the bride in advance. A photo album, home amulet, handmade candles and other similar items may be suitable as a gift. The rules of matchmaking state that after the matchmakers meet, they should be taken to a laid table and, while eating, discuss the main reason for the meeting - the wedding.


What to take with you?

Analyzing the nuances of modern matchmaking, the first thing that comes to mind is the festive loaf. Matchmakers on the groom's side must carry baked goods placed on an embroidered towel in their hands. This sign invites the bride to move into the groom's house. It should be noted that the loaf, like a special guest of the holiday, is always present at the event and is eaten at the very end. According to another tradition, future relatives, namely the groom's matchmakers and the bride's parents, are tied with towels. But not everyone uses this ritual.


In modern times, the groom has not stopped going to matchmaking empty-handed. Flowers for the ladies, souvenirs for the bride's relatives and pleasant little things for any occasion must be present in the guy's pocket. For the holiday to be a success, the event scenario should be prepared in advance and worked out in detail. An experienced matchmaker will help you draw up a detailed action plan. In this case, modern matchmaking will be held at the highest level.


What should I say?

Before going to matchmaking, the groom's relatives must prepare special words for the bride's parents. They must introduce themselves, the groom and clarify the essence of their visit. After the welcome stage, guests go into the house, where conversations about the upcoming celebration begin. Understanding the seriousness of the event, matchmakers should conduct any conversations about the wedding smoothly, but at the same time not include specifics. Veiled phrases will lead to greater understanding of future relatives.


In fact, conversations as hints date back to the times of Rus'. So, if the bride’s parents refused, the groom would not be so offended. And this decision will not harm the girl’s reputation in any way. Since matchmaking has been an obligatory element of the wedding ceremony, Only a few phrases have survived to this day, for example:

  • “a matchmaker doesn’t go with the truth”;
  • “the matchmaker has the first cup and the first stick”;
  • “You’ll start wondering how to give away the girl.”


Moreover, every phrase has a hidden meaning. According to traditions, in case of doubts, the bride’s parents said the words “thank you for love, matchmaker, but now we don’t want to give the girl away.”

How to behave correctly?

Each matchmaking participant has a specific role. The main part of the work lies on the shoulders of the matchmakers on the groom's side. They should be cheerful and positive-minded. Under no circumstances should matchmakers tell compromising facts about the bride or her relatives.


Having entered the girl’s house, the bride’s parents invite the matchmakers to a laid table. In addition to masterpieces of culinary art, there are strong drinks on the table. Since ancient times, the tradition of matchmaking has been accompanied by the belief that matchmakers should not give up alcohol, thereby confirming the fact of respect and trust in the bride. The main thing is without fanaticism, so as not to spoil the holiday for lovers.


The groom himself should behave with restraint, he should not argue, much less demand anything. The only thing he needs is to win the favor of the bride's parents, thereby receiving their blessing. The bride, in turn, must sit silently and just watch the entire procession. Previously, the custom required the girl to constantly dress up in the most beautiful outfits, but today you can refuse this.

Just a couple of decades ago, the ritual of matchmaking in all its glory - with jokes and jokes, outfits and rituals could only be found in the provincial outback. City residents limited themselves to a short acquaintance of families before the wedding and resolving financial issues regarding the main celebration. Nowadays, there is a tendency to revive ancient traditions, and more and more young people are asking what is needed for matchmaking in order to begin their wedding marathon with this beautiful ceremony.

From ancient traditions to modern scenario

Among our ancestors, matchmaking performed the pragmatic function of finding a suitable match for both a young man and a girl. Often, young people met for the first time precisely at the moment when matchmakers appeared on the threshold of a girl of marriageable age.

Behind the ritual action was hidden a banal deal between parents - it was not for nothing that the first words of the matchmakers in the house of the prospective bride were the sacramental phrase “You have a product, we have a merchant.” Often the girl’s parents refused uninvited guests - it was believed that the first matchmakers only paved the way for the most profitable gentleman.

Modern matchmaking is very different from the ancient ritual, although it retains some traditional attributes: matchmakers, bargaining for the bride, parental blessing. The colorfulness of this almost theatrical performance today is designed to create a warm and friendly atmosphere when two families meet - after all, the very fact of a future marriage in most cases has already been decided by young lovers, and matchmaking is carried out to resolve organizational issues.

Of course, in some ethnic or religious groups the original meaning of the ceremony remains the same, but that is a completely different topic.

Today, both parties prepare for matchmaking by setting a meeting date in advance. Young people and their parents clarify what to prepare for matchmaking, invite matchmakers from among their relatives (or turn to professional matchmakers), and think through the holiday scenario.

Much attention is paid to the signs and symbolic meaning of some customs and details of the ritual. But along with traditional matchmaking, a young couple often organizes creative parties, where a marriage proposal takes place in the form of a costume performance related to the hobbies or subculture of the bride and groom.

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Preparation rules on both sides

Both the groom and the bride should prepare for matchmaking with equal seriousness. Each side has its own characteristics and rules.

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What should the groom prepare?

Even with all the conventions of modern matchmaking, many couples, paying tribute to traditions, try to adhere to a certain ritual, which takes into account folk signs, superstitions, and folklore features. The first step in preparing the meeting is to agree on a convenient date with all participants - an unexpected visit to the bride's parents can put everyone in an awkward position. At the same time, they pay attention to the fact that the matchmaking takes place on a good day - they do not match on Wednesday and Friday and avoid the 13th.

Then you should prepare a script according to which the ceremony will take place. Of course, you can turn to a professional matchmaker, but more often they organize everything on their own. Senior relatives can suggest what the groom needs for matchmaking in order to organize a holiday in a traditional style. But no matter what style the script is written, the groom should prepare gifts for his beloved and her parents in advance.

Bouquets will be a wonderful gift for the future wife and her mother. For a girl, delicate and sophisticated flowers in light colors are suitable; for a mother-in-law, as a sign of respect, you should choose a more luxurious and rich bouquet of her favorite flowers.

The future father-in-law will be pleased to receive a present related to his hobby (you can check with your girlfriend in advance about her parents’ preferences). If there are also close relatives of the bride in the house, then we must not forget about them either - symbolic signs of attention will be very helpful.

The groom cannot do without the traditional loaf and engagement ring, which he puts on his beloved after receiving her parents’ consent to the marriage. The loaf is cut by the bride at the end of the feast, and everyone present eats a piece as a sign of the inviolability of the contract. In some areas, there is a custom of tying matchmakers and parents with towels or scarves, so a young man should take care of these attributes as well.

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What to prepare a modern girl for the arrival of matchmakers

A modern girl, when matchmaking, will not, like her great-grandmother, hide in the corner or shovel ash from the stove. But she will prepare in advance everything that is needed for matchmaking on the part of the bride, so that the visit of the groom with the matchmakers will be fun and relaxed.

In accordance with the general scenario, the girl prepares comic competitions for the groom, mother-in-law and father-in-law. You can also prepare a comic speech in which the merits of your future wife are colorfully described. A story accompanied by a colorful selection of photographs (in the form of a poster, presentation or slide show) will look especially impressive.

The feast after the matchmaking is another element of the pre-wedding rituals, called in the old days “the bride’s drinking party”; it is carried out if the girl’s parents agree to the marriage. But in our time, consent is usually obtained in advance, so the two rituals are combined into one - after the official part of the matchmaking, the newlyweds and their parents prefer to resolve all organizational issues related to the wedding at the festive table. So signature dishes will be a good advertisement for your culinary skills.

Return gifts to the groom's relatives are also one of the elements of traditional matchmaking. This could be a beautiful shawl or a fashionable scarf for the mother-in-law, an original souvenir or a bottle of elite alcohol for the father-in-law, sweets or toys for younger sisters and brothers.

If a girl knows how to do needlework, then it would be nice to make gifts with her own hands - a high-quality handmade item will always be a worthy sign of attention, be it an embroidered tablecloth, a warm knitted blanket or an original photo frame. For traditional matchmaking, scarves for tying matchmakers and an icon for blessing are also prepared in the bride's house.

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If young people decide to hold an event in a traditional style, then they should make a list in advance of what is needed for matchmaking:

  1. Matchmakers. Usually, the groom invites a matchmaker from among his acquaintances or a matchmaker from his relatives. In some regions, both the bride and groom invite married couples whose marriage can be called happy. The duties of the matchmakers include conducting mock auctions for the bride and “concluding” the marriage agreement.
  2. Matchmaking script. A professional script from an agency or written by yourself is a matter of taste. The most important thing is that all participants in the action do not feel awkward and actively participate in the ceremony.
  3. Necessary attributes and ritual items. Embroidered towels, scarves, loaves, icons, ransom and dowry - each locality has its own religious customs, so they are chosen taking into account the religion and nationality of the bride and groom.

But the most important thing that the bride and groom need for matchmaking is mutual love and a sincere desire to create a happy and strong family.



If matchmaking occurs on the part of the bride, we will consider what to say and how to behave in this material. In the old days, matchmaking was associated with a large number of signs and traditions that were strictly observed. The first and most important sign is that the better the matchmaking went, the better and happier the couple’s family life will be.

Of course, the importance of observing traditions during matchmaking has not been disputed. It was a day of respect for the ancestors, who, of course, watched everything and could bring happiness and prosperity to the young family, ward off misfortune and simply help in difficult times. Excellent cheerful and beautiful.

How to behave during matchmaking

If you watch a modern video on the topic of matchmaking on the part of the bride, what can I say, then it will, of course, be different from what happened before. A hundred years ago in Rus', matchmaking lasted for a week. On one day they matched the bride, on the second the parents got to know each other better, then there was a bridesmaid ceremony and an engagement party.

Plus, to these important stages, which are described above, you can add a ritual when the bride’s relatives came to look at the groom’s house and household, when the bride’s singing took place at a noisy feast, and then the matchmaking was considered completely accomplished and to refuse marriage after this was considered a great sin and shame.

How to get married

It all started with the fact that an agreement was concluded before the wedding. It was discussed with the matchmakers who came to the bride’s house what the groom was like and why he wanted the chosen bride as his wife. The first stage of negotiations was conducted by a local matchmaker.




When consent was received from the bride's relatives to accept matchmakers from the groom, a festive treat was presented and the matchmakers were seated at the table. A long conversation took place, during which the families got to know each other, had fun, competed in wit and discussed issues important for the future family. How beautiful in prose and poetry.

Interesting! An ancient custom says that during matchmaking, the bride should sit on the stove and carefully remove the ashes so as not to stain her best outfit, which she puts on for this purpose.

Again, there were many different folk signs when, judging by the behavior of the bride, the matchmakers could understand whether the groom was nice to her. For example, if a girl started moving from the threshold to the stove, it meant that she liked the groom. If she swept the floor from the stove to the threshold, then with such a gesture she drove away the matchmakers.

So, the exact matchmaking scenario on the part of the bride is no longer necessary to say. But certain rituals, still, as a tribute to antiquity and traditions, must be observed. The bride's relatives must treat the matchmakers, and during the meal tell them how their girl is a jack of all trades. Also tell or at least hint about what kind of dowry awaits. A good omen is the arrival of matchmakers on odd dates on the calendar.

Shows are being held

Matchmaking on the part of the bride, what to tell the bride's parents? Most likely, you will have to talk a lot during the screening. They pass after the first treat and the girl must show the groom’s relatives what she can do and look at her dowry.

It is customary for a girl to change her outfit three times during the show. After this, the young man once again discussed the girl’s merits with his relatives and drank a full mug of intoxicating mead if he liked the girl and definitely intended to marry her. If the groom only had a drink, this indicated that he was rejecting the bride. If after the viewing both parties are ready for marriage, then an engagement was concluded.

Interesting folk traditions for matchmaking:

*Mourning of the bride’s braid was carried out just before the engagement. The braid was a symbol of unmarried freedom, and the bride and her bridesmaids mourned this freedom. This custom has been preserved since pagan times, when after marriage the husband cut his wife’s braid and thus gave it to the bride’s family as a sign of kinship.
*After the engagement has been concluded, the bride's family must pay a return visit to the groom's house to evaluate the household.
*Singing is another interesting folk tradition, which is rarely observed today, but is colorful and interesting in itself. After agreeing on the wedding date, the guy and the girl were put together for the first time and on a bearskin. This ceremony was carried out so that the young would have many children.




Do you need gifts for matchmaking?

In the old days, it was believed that the future mother-in-law should be given a scarf, and the reconciliation and other relatives should be given a piece of flax. Nowadays, you can choose gifts yourself depending on the financial situation of the family.




So what can we say?

Nowadays, of course, the young people themselves get to know each other first, and when they decide to get married, they already introduce their parents. This is called matchmaking. On this day, the bride's parents can ask the groom about plans for the future, what kind of future family he sees, about his habits and preferences in life. When they get married.

When meeting the groom's parents, the bride is advised to remain silent. The conversation should be controlled by the elders at the table, that is, the parents. You should eat and drink less, of course, don’t worry. Talk to parents respectfully and not interfere in conversations with elders. Today you are turning into children again and it is your parents who are in charge. That's what matchmaking is for.

Matchmaking on the part of the bride, you already know what to say and do. You can try to do everything not cutesy, but with a folk Russian scope. Each matchmaking tradition is bright and interesting; it will definitely help you remember this important day of meeting your relatives for many years.

The customs and rites of matchmaking date back to ancient Rus'. This was a very important moment before the wedding. It looked like a rather fun event, which was accompanied by songs, music and ditties. It could last either 3 days or several years.

Back to the past

In Rus', the main purpose of matchmaking was to obtain blessings for marriage from the bride's parents. From the groom's side, matchmakers (this could be brothers, godfather or uncles) came to the house where the girl lived, accompanied by girls and boys with accordions, songs and ditties about the groom.

Their main task is to praise their fiancé, talk about his merits and strengths. All this took place on the street, and if the girl’s parents wanted to continue the conversation, they invited her to go into the house. The groom also needed to purchase bouquets for the bride and her mother.

How did the matchmaking ceremony take place?

People who came to ask for consent to the wedding, the bride's parents and matchmakers sat down at a beautifully decorated table, rich in a variety of dishes. It is very good if the betrothed prepares the treats, so she will show that a skillful housewife and guests can try the food prepared by the future wife of her groom.

During the feast, abstract topics were discussed first, and then they moved on to the main issue. Do parents agree to give their daughter to their fiance? The girl does not participate in the negotiations. She stays in a separate room until she is called. After receiving a positive answer, further preparations for the wedding begin, and if negative, you can repeat the matchmaking later.

Dowry

Particular attention was paid to the bride's dowry. The girls' parents began collecting it from childhood. There should be towels, dishes, and bed linen. The bride's handiwork was highly valued.

On the bride's side, the matchmakers should thank the guests for their visit and say that it is necessary to check how the guy is living. During the reception to the groom's family, the bride's parents come and inspect the building, the household, and ask what useful tasks the guy does around the house. After this, they only make the final decision about the wedding. If the parents thought that the groom would not be able to feed the new family, then they refused the wedding, despite the love of the young people.

If the wedding takes place, the newlyweds arrange a family meeting. How is this event going? At this holiday, relatives of both the groom and the bride gather. First, each family member is introduced, and then the issues begin to be discussed. How will the wedding be celebrated? Where can the young family live then? Who will be responsible for the refreshments? Who pays the costs? Previously, all material and organizational issues were taken care of by the groom's family, the other side only helped if desired.

Back to basics fashion

In the modern world, matchmaking looks completely different. Now the groom comes to the bride’s parents after a long conversation with her. And the issue of marriage is decided mainly by the girl, and not by the parents, who previously could prohibit or allow a wedding without the daughter’s consent.

Nowadays, many young people like to refer to the previous conditions for matchmaking. How to conduct this event and the scenario can be seen in this video

If matchmaking is carried out in the Russian style, then you must remember that this cannot be done on Wednesdays and Fridays. It is better to choose the date of the 3rd, 7th, 9th of each month and do not start the event on the 13th.

We follow traditions

In order not to break tradition, it is necessary for the bride to go to another room while the entire matchmaking process takes place. To begin with, if a guy comes with matchmakers, then they are given the first word. They should praise their groom, tell him how he helps everyone and what he can do. It will look more profitable and interesting if the speech is delivered in verse. The girl’s parents will understand how the groom and his family prepared for this day, tried hard, and they will be very pleased. When the groom and his entourage are invited to the house, you should give a bouquet to the girl (when she comes out) and her mother.

How should a feast take place?

During the feast they continue to tell how good and hardworking the groom is. The bride's parents praise their daughter and say what she can do. Parents should think about what they will talk about in advance. Discuss with your daughter the moments of her life that can be told and what is better to omit. It will be good if you put dishes prepared by the bride on the table.

Girl's outfit

According to customs, when making a match, a girl should think very carefully about her outfit. He must be one of the best, but also quite modest. Do not wear revealing or short outfits. You should also limit yourself when it comes to jewelry. Manicure should be neat and not bright.

To make it fun

To make matchmaking fun and avoid awkward silences, you can invite a professional matchmaker. She will eloquently talk about the bride or groom, and the feast will not turn into incoherent communication.

Nowadays, few people pay due attention to matchmaking. Mostly, young people themselves make decisions about organizing a wedding. Meeting the parents of the bride or groom takes place in a family setting.

Video on the topic of the article:

At all times, marriage was considered a sacred union of two young hearts. And if earlier marriage was a kind of necessity, now it is an exclusively voluntary and desirable matter on each side.

Not a single wedding in Rus' was complete without a number of traditions and customs. Currently, many of them have sunk into oblivion, but, for example, matchmaking of a bride, has a place in the modern world. The Svadebka.ws portal will lift the curtain on the secrets of how the matchmaking ceremony takes place and tell you how to match a bride these days.



The main rule of modern matchmaking is a pre-agreed and planned date. It is unlikely that the bride's parents will be happy with unexpected guests.

The ancestors believed that the date of matchmaking should be chosen especially carefully, because it would help the newlyweds in their future married life. So, for example, it was strictly forbidden to get married on the thirteenth; the best numbers for the ceremony were considered 3, 5, 7, 9. In turn, ancestors advise choosing Tuesday or Thursday, as well as weekends, for matchmaking.

During the ceremony, it is the groom who is the center of attention. In order not to lose face, the future spouse should prepare in advance and find out how modern matchmaking works. You can always check with the bride or the older generation about the specifics of traditions.


What is required from the groom:




Since ancient times, there has been such a tradition as dowry for the bride. Modern parents also try to prepare their daughter for a future married life, especially if the young couple will live in the house of the groom’s parents or completely separately.

Modern bride's trousseau:

  • Appliances;
  • Bed dress;
  • Dishes;
  • Kitchenware;
  • Tablecloth and napkins;
  • Furniture.

The dowry depends solely on the financial capabilities of the parents, as well as their desire to help the future family.

It is customary for the dowry to be displayed to matchmakers and guests. This is how the bride’s side demonstrates that the daughter is not entering the new family empty-handed.



In addition to the dowry, the bride should take care of other aspects. For example, carefully consider the appearance and holiday menu.

Before getting married, not only the groom, but also the bride must prepare presents for the parents of the chosen one. In the old days, the mother-in-law was presented with a red scarf or shawl, and the father-in-law was presented with a piece of linen for a shirt. Currently, such gifts may not come in handy, so it is worth finding out in advance about the tastes and interests of future relatives.

Moreover, on the day of matchmaking, the bride is not obliged to give gifts to the groom. On this day, all attention and sensitivity should be focused on the loved ones close to you.


The image of the bride at the time of matchmaking

Prepare a modest but beautiful outfit. Avoid large and flashy jewelry, rich colors and provocative prints in clothes, bright makeup and manicure. Appearance is especially important if the bride and groom's parents are meeting for the first time. Remember you can't make a first impression twice.

Treats

Every mother-in-law wants her son to “fall into good hands.” The bride should take an active part in preparing dishes for the festive table, thereby demonstrating her thriftiness and homeliness.

Future fathers-in-law will definitely appreciate it if their favorite dishes are on the table (find out about them in advance from your chosen one).


Behavior

The groom's parents will definitely pay attention to the bride's attitude towards her parents and close relatives. Therefore, try to suppress your impulsiveness and be prepared to show your exclusively positive sides.


  1. Communicate respectfully not only with the groom’s relatives, but also with your loved ones;
  2. Do not interrupt the older generation, especially when it comes to the distribution of responsibilities at the wedding. The newlyweds will definitely be asked for their opinion, but before that, the parents should clarify some points among themselves;
  3. Leave any manifestations of tenderness, kisses and diminutive names for later. Parents may simply be embarrassed by this behavior of future spouses;
  4. The girl should show maximum housekeeping: monitor the cleanliness of cutlery and dishes, promptly remove dirty plates and renew dishes that are running low;
  5. The bride should under no circumstances praise herself. This is what relatives and friends are for.

There are two ways to conduct matchmaking: like a regular feast or think through a scenario and organize a real show! It depends only on you how the matchmaking will go and with what impressions the groom’s relatives will leave your house! After all, with jokes and competitions, a serious ceremony will be easy and positive!

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