How should a man behave on a date. How to behave on a first date: advice from psychologists on how to make a positive impression on a partner

Be ready to make decisions. If the person you're going on a date asks you about where you want to spend time, don't be afraid to speak up. Most likely, in this way he shows attention to you, offering to make his choice. Show that you can make decisions.

Choose an activity during which you can interact with the person. For example, watching a movie together is not a good idea because you won't get to know the person better. Have a cup of coffee together or visit a museum. Set aside time for communication.

Be punctual. Being late says that you do not value the time and the person who was made to wait. Therefore, come to a date on time or a little earlier than the appointed time.

Don't be indifferent. If you show indifference or indifference, you are unlikely to develop a close relationship with a person. Just be yourself. Don't be afraid to show emotion.

• For example, if a person invites you to a movie, you should not limit yourself to the following phrase: "I liked this movie." Don't be afraid to show your enthusiasm. You can say: "I really liked this movie! The main character of the movie was amazing!"

Turn off your phone. If you are not a doctor who needs to be always in touch, you can do without a phone during a date. Show the person that you value their time and the attention they give you. You can do this if you are not distracted by phone calls or messages.

Take a deep breath. If you are too tense, the person you went on a date with will definitely feel it. Take a moment to relax. Enjoy being with this person.

Have a good time. The meeting should take place in a pleasant and cheerful atmosphere. If you enjoy communication, then your companion will certainly be pleased with the time spent with you.

Listen, at least as much as you speak. The art of listening is tantamount to the art of speaking well. So listen to your interlocutor. Try to hear what your companion wants to convey to you. Do not think about what you will say next at this time. When you answer the interlocutor, show that you are listening carefully.

• If your companion says that he likes gardening, do not respond by saying that you are far from it. Ask questions related to what interests this person. For example, you might ask, "Really? What do you like to grow? Do you have a big garden?"

So, it's done! The time for subtle hints, light flirting is over. He invited you on a date. How to behave on the first date so that the second one follows? Many girls before the first date spend half a day in a beauty salon, paint their nails, do hairstyles, massages, masks. Behind this fuss, the main thing, your personality, is lost.

How do you make sure your first date goes well?

First, take a deep breath and relax. A man is worried just like you. Get ready for a date, but without fanaticism.

Clothing should be appropriate for the occasion, hair styled, make-up natural. You should not run headlong to buy a new dress and do a super-manicure, a man, most likely, will not notice anything. And your bad mood and fussiness are a must.

Remember that you are you. You have many virtues, a wonderful character, you cook deliciously and can make any worthy man happy. You should not seek men, let them seek you!

The most important thing is, of course, communication. What should you tell a man on a first date? Tell us about yourself, what you like, what you like to do in your free time, try to find common ground. Listen to the man. Let it unfold next to you.

What topics should you avoid on a first date?

• Don't talk about problems. The first date is not the time when you can dump a bunch of your family problems on a young man. No need to talk about the illness of a cat, deuces of a son and intrigues of colleagues at work. Men do not like to work with a vest. Leave these conversations for your girlfriends.
• Do not immediately make plans for a life together. Before you really get to know each other, you already tell him what will happen when you get married. These conversations will be relevant later, when you already know each other and understand that your partner is just as committed to family and marriage as you are. But on the first date, a man will perceive your dreams of a wedding, a house and two kids as an attempt to encroach on his freedom. It is unlikely that you will then have a second date, so take your time.
• Don't talk about your ex. You should not talk in detail about how many men you had, how many met, why they broke up. A man will think that you have not forgotten your exes and constantly compare him with them.

What to talk about with a man on a first date?

• Talk about him. People love to talk about themselves. Ask what he does, how he likes to spend his free time. Be prepared to listen to his stories about hunting, diving or conquering peaks. Ask a question about his achievements, any man will be happy to talk about his successes, especially when he sees your admiring face.
• Avoid templates. Often dates turn into interviews because people cannot relax, they talk about the weather, their studies, work, positions. Try to find out what the man likes, how he spends his free time, whether he often sees family and friends. So you can understand how you will spend your free time if you become a couple, where to go and who to meet.
• Ask interesting questions. So that the conversation does not go to a standstill, come up with interesting questions for your counterpart.
  For example, such a question: “What would you do if you had a million dollars?”
  You will immediately recognize a man’s favorite pastime, even if it has so far remained a mystery to him.
  “Where would you live if you could move anywhere?”
  Perhaps a young man would like to live in a large metropolis or in the suburbs, in any case, this topic can be developed further, talk about your preferences and come to something that will unite you. These questions will help you better understand the interlocutor and find common ground.

Conclusion: the most important thing is to behave naturally on a date! Do not get lost, try to get to know the interlocutor, show yourself from the best side, and the second date will not be long in coming.

How should a girl behave on a first date?

Often the first date is a kind of litmus test. After all, it’s not in vain that they say that the initial impression is always very important, so how your date number 1 goes depends on how your relationship will develop in the future.

If you like your companion and you want the first meeting not to be the last, the most important thing is to produce the right effect and create an attractive image that will not scare the guy away, but rather arouse interest and desire to continue communicating with you.

Many girls are worried before the first date, they don’t know what to wear and, most importantly, how to behave on it. Here are some tips to make your meeting a success.

How to impress on a first date

First, your appearance. Of course, you need to try to look as attractive as possible. But at the same time, if you are used to walking in sneakers, you should not wear huge heels, because you should feel comfortable and confident at the first meeting. Pay attention to your hairstyle, manicure and all sorts of little things. Men notice every detail, so dirty hair, leaking mascara or worn heels can greatly spoil the first impression of you. Conclusion - your appearance should be attractive and neat, but at the same time you should be comfortable and convenient.

The next thing you should think about is how to behave on a first date and what to talk about. Most importantly, be confident and natural. The affectation and feigned behavior can scare off any man, and besides, you can look funny and comical. Be friendly and open, talk about something neutral and pleasant. Do not limit yourself to short phrases and brief comments, support the topics that the man brings up. It is best when conversations are lively, when there are topics and hobbies that are interesting to both, both man and woman.

If you want to please your companion, do not be afraid to give him a sincere compliment and laugh at his jokes, and also look into his eyes when talking, smiling slightly at the same time.

There are also several "not" for the first date. For example, you should not start talking about your ex-men, you should not talk a lot about yourself, you should not start topics about diseases and any conversations that may offend or be unpleasant for your partner.

If you do not want to impress a girl of easy virtue, you should not go to a man's house on the first date. If your date is in a cafe or restaurant, you should not refuse the offered dishes, but at the same time, you should not order too much food and alcohol.

Olga Kuznetsova

A psychologist and linguist by training, she currently teaches languages. And he is looking for his soul mate.

Once I was in a relationship with a wonderful man and was happy. And then everything collapsed. Not immediately, of course, but more on that some other time. Of course, I was worried. And for quite a long time. And then I decided it was time to create a new relationship. And about a month ago I registered on a dating site.

There was a time when I listened distantly about my friends' endless failed attempts to "find something decent there." They often complained that their first dates with "amazing men" ended up being their last. Therefore, starting this stage, I tried to foresee, if not everything, then a lot. And to my surprise, every time everything went well!

1. Be real

Remember ads? A girl comes on a date and accidentally hears a young man waiting for her say to someone on the phone: “No, I haven’t found it yet. After all, I'm looking for the real one! The girl quickly changes her appearance, becomes "real" and makes an excellent impression on the young man. Who would have thought that everything in life is exactly like that?

From personal experience

Every time I was going to a meeting, I tried, let's say, not to gather. Already on the first date, I realized how right I was! I was met by a slightly immersed in work problems man in a sweater and jeans. It would be nice if I came in an evening dress or in a sexy blouse with a luxurious neckline!

It's amazing, but what I chose from my entire wardrobe absolutely corresponded to the place, time, my interlocutor, and most importantly -. Which significantly influenced the course of the entire meeting, because it allowed us to immediately be on the same wavelength. After all, we both came in what we feel comfortable walking, sitting, communicating. And it was so natural! In general, I recommend.

Although, perhaps your favorite and most comfortable outfit is just a sexy blouse? Well then, go ahead!

But remember: the “take me now” war paint and erotic outfit are more suitable for searching for dubious adventures, and not for your soulmate.

You may ask: what about the advice that a woman should first of all be attractive? Yes that's right. The question is: who do you want to attract?

For your potential husband, your femininity and inner beauty, which modern men perfectly notice at first sight, will most likely be attractive. And attraction at the level of the basic instinct will leave your relationship at this level and, most likely, forever.

2. Smile Sincerely

The smile of the Mona Lisa will not suit us. Sometimes men fall into a strange stupor from such "female tricks" with a claim to the notorious mystery. A Hollywood smile with all 32 teeth will not suit us either. Psychologists have long explained why.

The only requirement for your smile: it must be sincere. You ask, how can you smile at a stranger, and even sincerely? Just think about how sincere you are now! You are sincerely glad that you came to the meeting, and here he is, already waiting for you, and you are really happy to see him, aren't you?

And I’ll tell you one more secret: there is nothing worse than a polite smile on a first date. Think for yourself, what can she say to your chosen one? Personally, I see something like this interpretation: “Well, it’s very nice, of course, that you came, but I’m so polite, and that’s why I smile at you so politely. I'm sure you already liked me, because I'm so polite.

From personal experience

To successfully use this technique, it is enough to create a special high spirits within yourself, which I like to call "quiet delight." Why is it quiet? And why the excitement? On the one hand, you do not gush with uncontrollable emotions, on the other hand, you do not exhaust your interlocutor with disturbing thoughts about your inner trouble. That is, we are looking for a golden mean.

If your delight is quiet, then it can be contained, but it is still present. He inevitably declares himself from time to time and first of all breaks through in yours, in a smile. And your smile is really joyful and sincere. Because at this moment you let your inner sun out.

A sincere smile disarms and disposes to itself in a special way. It forms a space of trust in which your interlocutor falls.

Using only this one technique, you will go most of the way towards each other in one date.

3. Keep it simple

Take things lightly. Experience shows that a person who is too fixated on the result, the chances of achieving it are sharply reduced. It's inexplicable, but it's a fact. Although, perhaps, the whole thing is in excessive tension. She doesn't decorate. And our task is to present ourselves in such a way that a person wants to see you again. Or even more than once!

It is also important not to try to show only your best sides. This will allow you to see the different reactions of your potential partner and see if he will be able to cope with your small shortcomings in the future.
Surprisingly, men also react positively to such openness. They also have something that they want to hide, there is a fear of spoiling. Realizing that you allow yourself not to be perfect, they themselves relax a little. And we remember that the main thing is to create an atmosphere of trust and comfort.

From personal experience

Basically, I tried to be the same as in life, to behave as usual, including allowing me to be imperfect. And this gave us the opportunity to immediately get to a different level of communication than the standard scraping with mutual bows.

For example, when I was 15 minutes late, I simply apologized and explained the reason without wringing my hands. And then she sincerely rejoiced at the calmness and loyalty of her interlocutor. And she was so happy that he noticed this joy. And she mentally gave herself a plus, seeing how he inwardly drew himself up from the feeling of his generosity. And then he told me that this happens to him, and finally relaxed. By the end of our communication, we already knew that both were imperfect. And if you look closely, it is this knowledge that creates a feeling of greater closeness.

Men love girls with whom it is easy to breathe, with whom you don’t have to build anything out of yourself, follow your every word, gesture, in other words - strain. Don't stress men out on the first date. After all, if they were in search, it means that someone before you already strained them very much!

4. Don't be afraid to ask

But ask about what is really important or interesting to you. Psychologists say that people love to talk about themselves. And it's a sin not to use it! Seeing your genuine interest, a man cheers up and becomes more calm.

Plus, while he's talking, you can look into his eyes for a long time, putting any feeling you want into him. Your look can be alluring, thoughtful, mysterious or perky, intriguing, with a twinkle! But most importantly, he must be open and friendly. For me personally, the last option was enough.

It is also on the first date that it stands, which will pave the way for your future relationship. Do not be afraid to discuss with the interlocutor the purpose of acquaintance, ask him what he expects from communication.

Tell us about yourself too. And here you are not talking about what you expect from the person himself or from the relationship in general: “You should be (hereinafter the list of 48 items) and then I'll marry you!" Talk about what attracts you to the prospect of continuing to communicate with him. If it's hard to tell a potential partner about it, tell it to yourself. Let a clear picture form in your head. By the way, this will help you keep the dialogue in the right direction.

From personal experience

Openness and mutual interest allowed us to talk enthusiastically throughout the meeting. No forced pauses, no awkward silences, no need to think hard about what else to ask.

And for difficult cases, there is one little secret, which I call the “hook loop”. Suppose you asked a question and received a detailed answer. And you notice that your interlocutor is frantically looking in the back streets of his own brain for what to ask you now. Help him out! Start talking about yourself by answering the same question that was asked of him. He will have time to silently admire you (I personally always say smiling). And there will be time to figure out what to talk about later.

We really love it when others are interested in us, our life, our thoughts. Deliver this joy to your potential partner!

Especially if you see that your questions do not confuse him and do not make him want to hide somewhere. And at the same time, you can find out for yourself everything that seems important to you.

5. Believe in yourself

This rule should become an axiom for you. Self-love, adequate self-esteem and self-confidence are the main components of your future success. And not just on the first date. These qualities form your inner core of a person who is stable in life. And they are the basis of your charisma and attractiveness. If you are the happy owner of this magnificent combination, feel free to set a date. The date will be successful!

And in conclusion, I would like to say: read articles, study trends, ask for advice, look for information. But first, listen to yourself! Your heart, your intuition will never let you down.

Be simple, real, sincere, ask, smile, believe in yourself!

The first opinion about a person plays a huge role in a man's decision to continue communication. To make a good impression on him, you need to work a little. We will tell you what to do so that the date does not cause discomfort and goes smoothly, who should pay in the restaurant, what not to do. In addition, you will find out whether a girl should call a guy after a meeting and what you can write to him. You will learn how to behave like a real woman and win the heart of a man in one go.

The first date is accompanied by excitement. Despite this, it is necessary to behave as naturally as possible. Attempts to appear as someone else, pretense and tension from the outside look unattractive.

Psychologists advise to relax and enjoy communication - flirt (without obsceneness), flirt (in moderation), show sincere interest, smile and joke. Just do it in such a way that it does not offend the man. Excessive tightness or licentiousness can scare away most of the stronger sex.

It's good if you have common topics for discussion. If you don’t know where to start, you need to ask a man about him, about his hobbies, work, etc. Attention and sincere interest attract. You can compliment the guy (you need to make sure that it does not sound like obvious flattery and observe the measure).

Care must be taken not to overdo it with alcohol on a nervous basis (one glass of wine or champagne will be enough).

You can unobtrusively touch the gentleman: hug during the dance, touch his hand with your own and watch his reaction.

Who pays

At a certain point on the first date, the question arises - who will pay the bill. Traditionally, this is the privilege of the man who invited the woman.

Do you want to know all the secrets of seducing men? We advise you to look free video course Alexey Chernozem "12 laws of seduction for women". You will receive a 12-step step-by-step plan on how to drive any man crazy and keep his affection for years to come.

The video course is free. To watch, go to this page, leave your e-mail and you will receive an email with a link to the video.

If you are not a feminist and the man does not offer to split the bill in half, let the gentleman pay. For many, this is an opportunity to feel wealthy, caring and attentive. And in principle this is the right position.

If a guy offers to pay in half or a woman wants to show herself progressive and independent, you can pay half the bill. In the second case, this must be done in such a way as not to offend the man. Try to gently explain your position and emphasize how pleased you are with his attention.

What to talk about that would be interesting to both

It is advisable not to load a man on a first date with his problems. He should be left with the impression that he spent time with a beautiful cheerful fairy.

Forbidden topics- former and, especially, current gentlemen, health, financial condition and any problems.

If you work together, it is advisable to avoid discussing business matters and focus on learning more about each other. You can find specific ones here. You can adequately start a conversation, lead it all evening and end it.

Afraid of failing your first date with a man? Fears are not unfounded, but we have for: how to overcome fear, where to go, what to wear, etc.

Very complex, this article will help to implement it. You will be able to prepare for the meeting according to all the rules, learn how to surprise a man, understand that he was pleased with everything.

How Not to Do

Psychologists unanimously argue that intimacy on a first date is unacceptable. Most men will be happy if the lady takes the initiative herself or responds to their offer to extend the evening until breakfast, but they are unlikely to decide to start a serious relationship after that.

When choosing an outfit, it is advisable to give preference to the one in which the girl feels comfortable enough. Clothing should be feminine, emphasize the dignity of the figure, but not hinder movements and cause discomfort.

On the first date, it is better not to talk about the seriousness of the relationship and about the wedding. Most often, the representatives of the stronger sex are terrified of women who want to get married as soon as possible and openly demonstrate this.

Remember good manners. A girl who uses obscene language, behaves hysterically, is rude to the attendants or is not familiar with the elementary rules of etiquette, is unlikely to make a man want to continue communication.

How to be after

Most often, the dilemma of calling or not calling a guy after the first date arises if the man does not show initiative in this.

If a man really likes a girl, then no amount of employment and circumstances will keep him from making a second date.

If several days have passed after the first date, and the man has not called or written, this most likely means that he is not interested in continuing communication. Do not suffer and do not blame yourself, find out. Here we discussed how long it is rational to wait, what can prevent the call from being made, what mistakes you could have made.

It is advisable in this case not to call or write first, but if the girl is not sure about the reasons for the silence of the gentleman, this can be done. Post a video or a link to a news item on social media and see how they react. If the dialogue does not start or there is no proposal to meet, it is better not to impose. Once you can write: “Thank you for a pleasant evening and for your attention, I hope you enjoyed it ...” or. We'll show you how to do it unobtrusively. Here you will find great ways and phrases.

If you watch this video, it will become clear that you must be an accommodating woman.

At the end of a date, if people like each other, a kiss follows. In the case of a meeting with an old acquaintance, he can be passionate and relaxed. If this was the first meeting with a gentleman, then it is advisable to limit yourself to a gentle kiss on the cheek, and leave a more frank kiss for a second or third date.