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Rules of conduct for a modern person. Basic norms and rules of etiquette

How does an ill-mannered person differ from a well-mannered one? Audrey Hepburn, a movie legend and a model of a lady, argued that a well-mannered person would never cause inconvenience to others.

The ability to restrain yourself and not be led by your desires and instincts is the main difference between a Neanderthal and an aristocrat, the actress argued.

rules of etiquette

In aristocratic circles, etiquette was taught from childhood, but the development of the market has made the elite much more diverse than centuries ago, and the rules of etiquette have ceased to be the prerogative of the elite.

Today, many of the ancient rules have been abolished as unnecessary, and their place has been taken by new ones related to our reality.

For example, did you know that putting your cell phone next to you in a restaurant is officially recognized as bad manners? (which, after all, almost all of us have).

“Who officially recognized this?” the persistent reader will ask. London School of Etiquette, the last bastion and guardian of good manners in our chaotic world.

Do you want to know what other rules of etiquette should be followed in polite society? Here's the list from LSE.

Never start eating until everyone at the table has been served.

Well, or until the hostess puts down the last portion and sits down at the table. Loading up on your portion without waiting for others is a sign of bad upbringing.

In exceptional cases, you can start eating if the hostess or the person waiting for your dish asks you to do so (sometimes different dishes require different cooking times, and while your neighbor is waiting for his order, your dish will already have cooled down).

There should be nothing on the table that is not related to food

Sunglasses, phone, keys, purses, etc. should be removed from the table the moment plates of food are placed in front of you.

The rules of table etiquette (how to use different utensils correctly) can be studied

Texting or checking your phone at the table is not acceptable.

If you are waiting for an important call, or need to send a message, then excuse yourself, go to another room, to the veranda or to the toilet, and only there take your phone out of your purse or pocket.

Instead of “I don’t drink,” say “thanks, not today.”

A very nice rule of etiquette - it turns out that people who categorically declare that they are against alcohol can offend or injure those who are very much in favor.

It turns out to be like opposing yourself to those who are not averse to drinking a glass of wine and are already in the mood for it, and you ruin their whole mood with your manifesto.

However, LSE experts say, if you slightly change the wording, your refusal will be taken completely calmly. You never know, for whatever reason exactly today do you refuse a glass of wine? In a decent society, no one will focus on this.

Always warn the person you are talking to that you are using speakerphone

If you are making a call and want to turn on the speakerphone, be sure to warn your interlocutor about this so that he does not find himself in a stupid situation by accidentally saying something intended only for your ears.

The door is opened by the one closest to it

Hurray, women have won the right to open the door for themselves, without waiting for a man to arrive.

If a couple approaches the door together, then it is no longer necessary to wait for the man to open and hold the door; this rule of etiquette is gone along with the era of prim gentlemen and helpless ladies tied in corsets.

It is indecent to heat or eat food that smells strongly in the office.

Especially if you eat at your desk. In public spaces and areas, etiquette prohibits the use of strong scents or the consumption of anything whose smell may disturb others.

If you've ever sat at your desk and irritably tried to figure out who reheated the fish in the office microwave, then you know what we're talking about.

They always leave the elevator and the room first, and only then enter

In other words, there is no need to break into a store, elevator, subway car or other room until those who want to leave have left it.

If only this rule of etiquette could be instilled in a school of compulsory injections...

Don't send empty messages and letters

There is no need to fill your mailbox with letters that contain one word “thank you” or a smiley face - it is better to write “thank you in advance” in the first letter of appeal, and do not waste time from your interlocutor (and do not litter his mailbox) with meaningless messages, this is required by modern rules of etiquette.

Don't send work emails or messages outside of business hours

In 99 cases out of 100, the matter can wait until tomorrow; pulling a colleague, partner or employee out of his personal or family affairs is a sign of your poor upbringing.

remove lipstick from your lips before drinking from a glass

Traces of lipstick on a wine glass or glass were considered bad manners in the days of Audrey Hepburn, and continue to be considered such today.

If you wear lipstick, remove the lipstick with a napkin before drinking from a glass, put the napkin in your purse, and reapply lipstick after dinner.

Don't reach across the table

If a dish of bread or salad is not within arm's reach, ask the person sitting closest to pass it to you.

Before you serve food for yourself, ask the person sitting to your right and left if they would like it too. And if so, then serve them first, and only then put food on your plate.

Shared dishes are always passed on against clockwise

If a side dish or salad is served on a large platter and everyone helps themselves, then you should take this dish from a neighbor on right, and then pass it on to your neighbor left.

However, LSE experts note, if one of the guests does not know this rule and initially sets the wrong direction (clockwise, not counterclockwise), then one should not draw attention to this, so as not to put him in an awkward position.

When you introduce someone, the older one always introduces himself first.

If you introduce a friend to your dad, then the correct thing to do is: “Meet Ivan Ivanovich, my father, and this is Sergei, my friend.” In the case of business acquaintance, the one who is higher in status first introduces himself; this is required by the rules of etiquette.

In the office, hospital, or institutions, always put your phone on vibration

And if you need to talk, then go outside the common room so as not to disturb others.

In a theater or cinema, the phone should be set to airplane mode, so as not only not to disturb other spectators with vibration and ringing, but also not to distract the performers with the light of the active screen.

If you are sick, stay home

Coming to work with an active cold and infecting other colleagues is very bad manners. About how to quickly get yourself back on your feet.

Don't let your guests drink and drive

Unofficial rules of etiquette state that you, as the hostess, are responsible for the state in which guests leave your home.

If you see that one of the guests is not quite adequate, call a taxi and make sure that he does not get behind the wheel.

If you invite guests to your place, always check if they can take someone else with them

To avoid later an ugly situation when one of the invitees comes with a couple that you were not expecting, or with children that you are not ready to accept, and all the emotions about this will be reflected on your face.

When you talk to someone, take off your sunglasses and headphones

You can stay in sunglasses if your interlocutor does not take them off, although this is not very nice (but acceptable in some situations).

If your interlocutor is not wearing glasses, then it would be correct to take off yours during a conversation in order to look into each other’s eyes.

Don't forget to say thank you to the hosts the day after the party

Be sure to send a message or letter thanking you for the evening you spent visiting friends or acquaintances.

In exceptional cases (for example, if the party was something outstanding), sending flowers with a thank you card or chocolate is acceptable, LSE clarifies.

Never come to visit empty-handed

Even if the hosts answered “nothing” to the question “what to bring,” bring flowers or a bottle of wine.

If the owners have children, then bring them something (it is better to check with the owners in advance whether you can bring sweets to the children, and if not, then get by with beautiful balls or trinkets).

Always check whether your interlocutor can talk to you at the moment

It doesn’t matter whether you are calling for work or for a personal reason, before starting a conversation, be sure to ask whether your interlocutor has time for it.

follow the dress code

Make a difference between how you dress for a party with friends and the way you dress for your workspace.

Even if you work in the creative industry and you don’t have a strict dress code, a bare midriff, too much cleavage or translucent fabrics are strictly inappropriate in the workspace.

Neatness and attention to one's appearance is a sign of good upbringing

You don't have to spend a lot of money on clothes, but paying attention to your appearance is a form of politeness towards others.

Breastfeeding and changing diapers - intimate procedures

LSE puts an end to the debate about what is natural and what is not, and whether a breastfeeding mother has the right to feed her baby anywhere.

LSE experts argue that breastfeeding in a public place is possible if the mother covers the baby and does not publicly expose her breasts, covering them with a diaper and not embarrassing others with the physiological nature of the process, which not everyone is ready for.

Etiquette rules require changing diapers in break rooms, and not in front of your interlocutors or in the middle of a restaurant. If you are visiting, you need to ask the hosts where this can be done so as not to disturb others.

The one who initiated the conversation always calls back

If the connection is interrupted during a call, then the person who called should call back, not you - your task is to wait and try not to occupy the line.

If you hear the accent of your interlocutor, then do not ask the question “where are you from?”

If you are talking to a foreigner, and this question is acceptable in the context (for example, you are at an international party and everyone is asking each other where someone came from), then this question can be asked.

If you are talking to a person in your own language and hear that he is a newcomer, then do not focus on this, this is bad form.

Don’t litter your friends’ social media feeds with meaningless posts and messages.

These etiquette rules are very clear. LSE specifically recommends creating two accounts - professional and personal, and making a difference between the content you post in them.

If you use the same profile, and among your friends and subscribers there are colleagues and close friends, then do not publish too personal photos (for example, from the beach) or overtly personal information that your colleagues do not want to know about you. .

do not be more late than is acceptable

Being late for dates, business meetings or meetings in a restaurant is bad manners.

But if you go to visit someone’s house, then vice versa, you should be 15 minutes late(no more) to give the owners time to complete all preparations. If you are 15 minutes late for a business meeting, be sure to give a warning. If you are more than 15 minutes late for your visit, be sure to notify the hosts of the exact time of your arrival.

Modern rules of etiquette are practically no different from the rules of etiquette of past centuries. The pace and way of modern life have made some adjustments.

Of the general rules, we can highlight the ten most relevant and necessary for a decent person to follow.

The first rule of etiquette: polite attitude

As the first rule, we can highlight a polite attitude towards people around us. Acquaintances, nearest and dearest, or complete strangers. And it doesn’t matter where exactly the person is: in a store, public transport, on the street, at work, at home. Always and everywhere you must be able to politely address others.

Second rule of etiquette: greeting

The second rule states that those entering the room must greet first. Whoever it is: a boss, an academician, a president, a simple passer-by, a child. The words of greeting should come from the person entering.

It should be noted that if a companion greets a stranger, the couple should also say words of greeting.

The third rule of etiquette: gratitude

People often forget to say words of gratitude to their closest relatives, loved ones and friends. Taking everything that happens for granted. After all, their care and love is not forced, but from the heart. The third rule of modern etiquette is the word thank you.

The fourth rule of etiquette: decent behavior in public places

When in public places, you should not laugh very loudly. Screaming and judging other people, while pointing fingers.

Fifth rule of etiquette: for drivers

Very often, drivers forget about the rules of decent behavior on the road. You cannot rush through puddles and mud, splashing pedestrians. Slow down, please.

The sixth rule of etiquette: cleanliness and fashion

While in public places, and even at home, a person must take care of personal hygiene. Dress in clean, neat clothes. Wear clean shoes. And you shouldn’t blindly follow fashion. It is better to dress not only fashionably, but beautifully and neatly.

The seventh rule of etiquette: unexpected guests

You cannot visit without an invitation. Be sure to notify us in advance of your visit.

Eighth rule of etiquette: smartphone and other people's SMS

When visiting, at a meeting, in a cafe or restaurant, you should never keep your smartphone on the table. This is a manifestation of complete disrespect for the interlocutor. And this means that virtual communication is more important than live communication.

Rummaging through someone else's phone or pockets in order to read SMS or simple correspondence is extremely impolite and ugly towards a person. This rule applies to both parents in relation to children and spouses.

The ninth rule of etiquette: responding to an insult

Now everyone has a lot of problems and worries. People try to throw all their anger and hatred at others. When faced with rudeness and insult, you just need to smile and move away, leaving the offender with all his anger. Don’t stoop to raising your voice and insulting them in response.

Tenth rule of etiquette: the habit of knocking on a closed door

Parents, as soon as the baby begins to live in a separate room, need to develop the habit of knocking before entering the nursery. Then the children will knock on their parents' bedroom door.

This is not the entire list of rules of modern etiquette, but by adhering to at least these ten, a person can win everyone’s respect. And be called with dignity a cultured and educated member of society.

Etiquette is a set of rules of good manners. There are a lot of them. But those who make a career, want to succeed and who have to communicate with representatives of the elite need to study them especially carefully.

Etiquette helps people behave correctly in any situation and society without causing any inconvenience to other people. Refined manners, correct speech, stylish image - all this plays an important role.

There are several types of etiquette:

the ability to present yourself: a properly selected wardrobe, well-groomed appearance, elegant gestures, pose, posture;
speech form: manners and culture of speech and communication;
table etiquette: table manners, knowledge of serving rules, ability to eat;
behavior in any public place;
business etiquette: negotiations and relationships with bosses and colleagues.

Rules of good manners for women

First of all, a girl or woman should look good. She must have a neat and well-groomed appearance, clean clothes and shoes, a properly selected bag and accessories.

Among the basic rules, the following should be highlighted:

You need to use perfume wisely. The strong smell of deodorant or even luxury perfume is considered bad manners.
It is better to exercise moderation in choosing jewelry and accessories. A large amount of jewelry or decorations looks too flashy.
You can only preen at home or in a specially designated room, but under no circumstances in public places. In society, you can only quickly look at your reflection in a small mirror and touch up your lips.
A bag on your lap is not the best choice. This is how they sit at the station. It is better to place a purse or a small handbag on the table. https://youtu.be/I7FirFX5UNw

A woman should always behave like a real lady, avoiding offensive remarks, inappropriate flirting and other liberties.

List of etiquette rules for men

A man should also look elegant, be neatly combed and adhere to the following rules:

Let your companion go first when entering the room.
Do not put your elbows on the table.
When sitting down at a table, first move the chair away for the lady, and then for yourself.
Don't leave your companion alone.
Do not smoke in front of a girl without her permission.
Indoors, in the presence of a girl, remove your headdress.
When getting off the bus or car, give the lady your hand.

A gentleman should not carry a woman's bag, and he can only carry women's outerwear to the locker room. On the street, a man should walk to the left of his companion.

Without the girl's consent, the gentleman has no right to take her hand or arm.

Etiquette standards for children

Raising children must be based on etiquette, because they will have to live in society. It is difficult for children to learn all the rules, but although they should know the most important ones:

Table manners:

sit at the table only by invitation;
eat with your mouth closed without talking;
get up from the table only with the permission of an adult.

Speech etiquette:

always say hello and goodbye;
express your gratitude and respect;
do not interfere in the conversation of older people, do not interrupt them.

Guest etiquette:

invite guests in advance;
do not go to people without an invitation;
visit only in a good mood;
be a guest for no more than 2–3 hours, so as not to bother people.

Having learned these simple rules from childhood, the child will continue to adhere to them in the future.

Conversational etiquette

Many young people consider communication culture to be an outdated concept, and this is completely in vain. After all, it is speech etiquette that helps to achieve authority and win the trust of others. The list of these rules is quite long:

When entering a room, you should always say hello first. This rule applies to everyone, regardless of age and status - schoolchildren, pensioners, directors or ordinary employees.
When meeting, the man greets the woman first, the junior greets the elder, the late greeter greets the person waiting, and the junior employee greets the boss.
When greeting people of senior status or age, you must stand or sit up. Giving your hand while sitting is a sign of bad manners.
A man should always introduce himself to a woman first. You cannot leave people to their own devices and oblige them to give their names.
After meeting, it is advisable to shake hands. It is impolite to serve only your fingertips.
It is very bad to interrupt your interlocutor. But you can and should express your interest in the subject of conversation.
The rules of small talk allow you to talk about anything you want, but without going into details and avoiding controversy.
It is necessary to monitor the tempo and timbre of your voice: it should be natural, but not tense. https://youtu.be/UtlwEY-CITE

Polite verbal forms and a friendly attitude towards your interlocutor help create a favorable impression of yourself.

Rules for communicating by phone

You also need to be able to talk on the phone. Without seeing your interlocutor, you can say a lot of offensive and unnecessary things to him. But private telephone conversations are one thing, and calls related to the type of activity are completely different.

Main rules:

You should not pick up the phone after the first call, only after the second or third. In the seconds saved, you need to mentally prepare for the telephone conversation by putting aside your business. In addition, if a company representative picks up the phone immediately after the first call, the client gets the impression that the employees have nothing to do and are simply bored at their place of work. But the main thing here is not to overdo it. If you pick up the phone later, the client may become nervous and lose patience.
First, be sure to introduce yourself, name your company, ask the name of the interlocutor and whether he has time for a short conversation. After this, it is advisable to immediately move on to the main issue.
It is necessary to monitor intonation and speed of speech. The voice should be clear, low, even and confident. It would be a good idea to match the pace of speech of the person on the other end of the line.
Don’t forget about polite phrases: “thank you”, “be kind”, “if it doesn’t bother you”.
Unnecessary use of speakerphone is prohibited. The person on the other end of the line immediately notices the difference in sound and begins to worry that someone is eavesdropping on him. This may also be evidence that the company representative is engaged in unrelated (more significant matters) and part-time answering calls.
When communicating on the phone, you must not smoke, drink or eat (chew gum). Although this is not visible, all this is reflected in the speech and looks terrifying.
After using the “hold” function, you should definitely thank the person for waiting. It’s not worth keeping your interlocutor on hold for more than a minute; it’s better to say that after clarifying the necessary information, they will call him back.
At the end, be sure to say goodbye and thank the interlocutor for taking the time to talk. There is no need to apologize for taking up time.

You need to talk to aggressive and demanding clients calmly, but decisively and confidently.

Good manners and business etiquette

If all employees adhere to business etiquette, a favorable atmosphere is created in the enterprise or company in which there is no room for conflicts.

You should never be late for meetings and business negotiations.
Company secrets and confidentiality of data must always be kept.
During a business conversation, you should not peer closely into the interlocutor’s face or lean over him. Also, when communicating, tilting your head to the side is not allowed.
The business card should only be presented with the right hand (even to left-handed people). The person who receives the business card should not hide it in the back pocket of his trousers or crumple it with his fingers.
Do not violate the boundaries of personal space and get too close to a person. The latter feels considerable discomfort. The minimum distance between interlocutors corresponds to the size of an outstretched arm. A person can only let relatives get closer to him.
A guest arriving on business must be seated at the right hand of the owner.
You need to watch your speech. A particularly unfavorable impression is produced by slang words, errors in stress and the use of words with the wrong meaning.
For a compliment you should always thank briefly and simply, without showing false modesty.
You always need to monitor your body position and gestures. It is unacceptable to talk with your legs wide apart, with your hands in your pockets, slouching and gesticulating strongly.

Business etiquette is the rules without which you cannot achieve success in business. They always try to adhere to them, even if there is instability all around both in politics and in the economy.

How to behave at the table

You also need to behave civilly at the table. This applies to both family holidays and dinner parties in a restaurant, cafe or at a party.

Rules of good manners at the table:

Never, under any circumstances, chew food with your mouth open. It looks terrible. Also, do not talk or laugh with food leftovers in your mouth. This is not only unsightly, but it can also cause choking.
Before you put a side dish, salad or appetizer from a common dish on your own plate, you must first offer it to those sitting next to you. They serve themselves food last.
Under no circumstances should you place your phone or smartphone on the table near you. This shows the person in a negative light: he is not interested in what is happening, he is constantly distracted by incoming messages and calls.

The table must be properly set, and all cutlery must be placed in its place.

House rules of good manners

Many people believe that at home they can behave freely and cheekily. But this is wrong, because parents and children, grandparents, sisters and brothers should show special politeness and goodwill in their relationships with each other. In order for family relationships to be strong and sincere, you need to rejoice in the successes of loved ones, thank them, support them in all endeavors, speak kind words more often and find compromises.

Bright and colorful things are very striking. They are not appropriate for business style; they can only be worn in informal settings.
Clothes should under no circumstances be vulgar, especially for women. A short miniskirt combined with a deep neckline is the height of disgrace. Only one of the designated elements can be present in the image.
The entire outfit should be elegant. This means that all materials, styles and colors must be chosen with taste.
You need to dress in such a way as to highlight the advantages of your figure and hide flaws.

There are a lot of subtleties and nuances. If possible, you should consult with an experienced stylist or tailor, who will tell you which things fit well, which ones don’t fit well, and which clothes are appropriate in a given situation.

A truly well-mannered person behaves impeccably everywhere: both in society and at home. Since we live in a society, everyone should learn this.

Content

In modern society, it is important to have good manners and be able to behave correctly in different life situations. Etiquette has many features and is a complex science. The main subtlety is that there are no clearly defined norms of behavior; everything depends on the circumstances, time and place. The rules of etiquette between a man and a girl will make communication more pleasant, and good manners will help to have a psychological impact on the partner.

What are the rules of etiquette

The concept comes from the French word “etiquette”, which means a set of generally accepted rules of behavior, knowledge of the basics of politeness. There are several main types of etiquette:

the ability to present oneself: the formation of a wardrobe, grooming, physical fitness, gestures, postures, posture;
speech form: ability to give compliments, greetings, gratitude, manner of speech;
table etiquette: ability to eat, knowledge of serving standards, table manners;
behavior in society: how to behave in an office, store, exhibition, museum, restaurant, theater, court;
business etiquette: relationships with superiors, colleagues, business negotiations.

Rules of good manners for men

If a representative of the stronger sex values his reputation in society, he will always observe moderation in clothing. Shorts and T-shirts are appropriate for a family dinner or during a country vacation. For an informal setting, sports or classic clothes are suitable, and for business meetings a tie and jacket are required. As for good manners, it will not be difficult for a well-mannered man to politely nod in response to a greeting even from a stranger. How to communicate with a woman, superiors, and relatives will be discussed below.

Modern etiquette for women

The first rule for a woman is tact in all situations. Etiquette lessons involve behaving respectfully with everyone, be it your neighbor, your business partner, or your front door cleaner. If a woman likes to joke, then she should clearly determine in what situation you can allow a joke, and with whom you need to be serious. It is necessary to observe a culture of communication with the opposite sex. You should not flirt, make advances or make eyes at men you don’t know or know – this is a violation of etiquette. Politeness presupposes simple communication without intrigue, gossip and rumors.

Etiquette standards for children

Rules of behavior in society also exist for children. Future success, career, and environment will depend on the knowledge that a child receives in childhood. The simplest methods for mastering the rules of etiquette are reading fairy tales, watching cartoons, using board games on a given topic, and humming songs. The basic rule of politeness for a child is respect for all adults, children, and animals without exception. Everything else flows smoothly from this.

How to behave in society

Basic set of etiquette rules for men and women:

Don't come to visit without calling. Only if you are visited without warning can you afford to meet a person in home clothes.
Do not place your bag on a chair or on your lap. A bulky backpack can be hung on the back of a chair. A purse or small handbag is placed on the table, and if a man carries a briefcase, then it should be left on the floor.
When meeting someone, say your name first if you are going to communicate with a group of people. Only the right hand should be served.
The passenger must sit in the back seat of the car. The most prestigious seat is the one located behind the driver.

In communication with people

A typical day for a modern person includes many situations in which culture of behavior and demeanor are tested: communication in stores, on public transport, meeting colleagues, rules of speech etiquette at official receptions, etc. As for the first meeting with a person, the impression is created on how well the interlocutor knows how to introduce himself. In everyday etiquette, younger people or men make acquaintances first. To make a good impression, you should always start your conversation with a smile.

How a girl should behave with a guy

Modern etiquette for girls requires knowledge of the basic rules of behavior with the opposite sex. When meeting a man for the first time, you should not throw yourself on his neck; it would be appropriate to simply extend your hand. On a date, you need to behave lightly and naturally, joke and smile, but not be offended. You can’t help but tell a man about your shortcomings or unsuccessful relationship experiences at the first meeting. There is no need to shout about the advantages either; you can mention them, but in passing.

Basic Etiquette

The rules of cultural behavior are simple: culture of speech, which has a stylistic and grammatical orientation, well-groomed appearance, attentiveness towards the interlocutor, the ability to provide a service to those in need, and listen to the speaker. The norm of acquaintance and subsequent communication is conditional, therefore it has the nature of an unwritten agreement about what is generally accepted and what is not. Every cultured person should know and follow the rules of etiquette, understanding their necessity for society.

Good manners

A well-mannered person is immediately distinguished from the crowd. He is distinguished by knowledge of etiquette and a certain manner of behavior: voice intonation, expressions used in speech, gait, facial expressions, gestures. This is restraint, modesty, the ability to control emotions, actions, words. To correspond to the concept of a secular, educated person, you need to know and follow certain rules that are considered mandatory in a decent society:

when greeting, the woman is the first to offer her hand to the man;
men greet everyone without exception while standing;
when introducing a guest to other people (during acquaintance), they call his name, surname, patronymic (during business communication - profession);
visiting does not bring a bad mood, and if negative emotions are present, then the visit should be abandoned;
Children should not be allowed to interfere in the conversation of adults, interrupt elders, or whisper in the ear;
No comments are made to other people's children in the presence of their parents;
When giving gifts to people, you should be tactful, taking into account gender, age, and profession.

Dressing skills

The rules of etiquette oblige you not only to know the correct manner of greeting acquaintances and strangers, to be able to maintain small talk and adhere to decorum in behavior, but also to wear clothes appropriate for the occasion. Nothing catches the eye like colorful things. Things that are inappropriate for a man include embroidered shirts, vulgar suits, and too bright ties. Business clothes should be moderately fashionable. In the morning you are allowed to wear a jacket, frock coat or suit jacket. The color should correspond to the season: light in summer, dark in winter.

The ability to dress tastefully is the first sign of a woman’s upbringing. The Encyclopedia of Etiquette contains a range of rules related to clothing, the observance of which distinguishes a real lady. Women's clothing should be appropriate to the nature of the work. An image that is acceptable in a model house will not be acceptable in a brokerage office. For a business lady, a too short skirt or a low-necked blouse will not suit a business lunch or conference. If the meeting is at a resort hotel or club, you need to take several outfits that will be suitable for different situations.

How to present yourself correctly

A few more generally accepted norms of etiquette:

you need to walk with a straight posture, a tucked stomach and straight shoulders;
communication norms regarding greetings include polite words, but they are not always correct, for example, “good afternoon” should not be said to a person with an upset face;
even unfamiliar men should help ladies enter the premises by holding the front door;
the word “please” should be used with any request;
Before saying goodbye to your interlocutor, you should first prepare for this: “Unfortunately, it’s too late,” and then say words of gratitude or a compliment (if it’s a woman).

Rules of etiquette when communicating

The rules of etiquette must be observed when communicating between women and men. The male representative should follow to the left of the companion and be the first to enter the restaurant. If a lady greets acquaintances, the gentleman should also greet them, even if the people are strangers to him. Without a woman's approval, a man has no right to touch her. Allowed only in moments of assistance (getting into a car, crossing the road). Smoking in the presence of another person, regardless of gender, is possible only with the permission of the interlocutor.

There are certain rules of speech behavior. So, if you are insulted in the presence of other people, you should not succumb to provocations. Get up and leave the scene. You cannot ask your interlocutor for information about his material well-being, love affairs and other personal things. If you invite a business partner to a meeting, do not forget about punctuality. Particular respect should be shown to people who showed generosity or came to your aid in difficult times - they were not obliged to do so.

Conversational etiquette

Rules of politeness exist in any conversation. Speech behavior is divided into written and oral forms, with the former having more stringent rules. There are several types of conversations: business, official, informal. The oral form has simpler rules, for example, instead of a verbal greeting, you can get by with a nod of the head. The ability to speak politely is to tell your interlocutor only those things that you yourself would like to hear. The basic principles of conversation are correctness, brevity, accuracy, appropriateness.

How to communicate with someone on the phone

Compliance with the rules of netiquette should also be observed when communicating on the phone. During the conversation, you need to carefully monitor your intonation, since the interlocutor does not see your face and may misunderstand the meaning of the message. You should not keep the person calling; the maximum time to pick up the phone is six rings. There is no need to rush to the phone either - it is better to answer after the third ring. It is customary to call the interlocutor by name if he is familiar. If not, then it is advisable to introduce yourself first.

Good manners and business etiquette

The basic norms of behavior include the rules of business communication. But not only the speech component is important when contacting partners, body language also plays an important role. For example, when talking, you should not spread your legs wide, keep your hands in your pockets, or hunch over. Excessive gestures are also not encouraged - in order not to embarrass the interlocutor, gestures should be restrained. Pay attention to the person’s personal space – the distance should be no less than arm’s length.

Household etiquette rules

Family members should be especially polite to each other. To maintain a warm relationship, you need to constantly monitor the psychological climate, sincerely rejoice in the successes of loved ones, not resort to insults during quarrels, use the words “sorry”, “thank you”, “good morning” and others to communicate. It is necessary to respect the older generation and not read the personal notes of your children without permission.

How to behave at the table

The main rule of table manners is to not chew with your mouth open. Talking is also undesirable, especially when chewing food. Before you put some of the common dish on your plate, you must first offer it to the rest of those present. You should not serve your own plate first, but give the opportunity to guests or older family members to do so. When setting the table, common cutlery is placed next to each dish. The soup must be served in special bowls from the person sitting to the right.

Etiquette at a party

Receiving friends and visiting them is a good practice in the etiquette form of dating. Dinner is considered the best time for a reception, but people should be invited in advance so that they can adjust their plans. The dress code may be informal. According to etiquette, an unfamiliar guest is called everyone present by name only after his own introduction. In a friendly company, you can skip serving the main course, but during a business dinner this is unacceptable. It is important to be able to use different types of cutlery, even if the owners have other national traditions.

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Norms and rules of decency for men and women - the basics of small talk and behavior in society

Etiquette is a historical phenomenon. All rules of etiquette, which are expressed in certain forms of behavior, unite the moral, ethical and aesthetic aspects of life. The first side expresses a moral norm: thoughtful care, respect, protection. The second side speaks of the beauty and grace of forms of human behavior.

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Etiquette as a set of laws of communication

Already in ancient primitive society, during joint work, certain requirements and norms of behavior were developed for all members of society. The oldest codes of conduct that have survived to this day were created five thousand years ago. The ancient Chinese “Book of Historical Legends” lists five basic human positive qualities: philanthropy, loyalty, wisdom, respect for elders, and courage.

Over time, new mores, customs, and morals appeared. Standards of behavior have been honed over centuries and merged into the concept of “etiquette” - a certain code of conduct, norms, and responsibilities that people must adhere to in different life situations.

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Etiquette rules for kids

The youngest children already know how to wave goodbye or smile when they meet. Dads teach boys to offer their hands for a firm shake, and mothers introduce babies on the playground, even if the baby himself peeks out from behind the parents.

When raising a child, adults, without noticing it, teach him lessons in etiquette, rules of communication with peers (“Say hello to a friend,” “You can’t take away toys, you need to ask permission,” “A girl needs to be let ahead and protected”) and with elders (“Give flowers for mom”, “Go and meet dad from work”, “Help grandma carry the package”).

Later, children will learn to use cutlery, thank their mother for preparing lunch, and behave correctly when visiting and in public.

You need to teach your child the rules of etiquette from a very early age. It is a shame for schoolchildren who do not give up their seats on public transport to older people. And, as you know, the easiest way to teach a child is by example. After all, his parents are both an authority and a role model for him. Follow the rules of etiquette yourself, and your child will know and apply them.

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Communication with friends and loved ones

If friends constantly send various nonsense (pictures, unnecessary links) to your work inbox, distracting you from work, then the best way out is to ignore it. Install a spam filter and when asked if the pictures were received, answer that no, since they are filtered out as an attack.

If women try to extort personal details, you can either refuse to answer, or be frank, keeping silent about intimate details and not saying anything about a person behind his back that could not be said to his face.

If a girl has received an invitation to a party or to visit, but she is going to go there with a young man, you need to first ask the organizers of the holiday if it is possible to come not alone.

If, after gatherings in a cafe, friends decide to split the bill equally, you can make an excuse by saying that you did not intend to spend a large amount today and pay only for yourself.

On a date you want to eat, then you need to boldly tell your gentleman about it, perhaps he will invite the lady to a cafe. But you should not order the most expensive dishes, because the visit to the restaurant was not planned, and the bill can put the man in an awkward position.

When breaking up, it is better to express everything in person, not limiting yourself to an email message; moreover, this will confirm your firm intentions not to meet again.

Should a woman accept an expensive gift from a fan to whom she is indifferent? The rules of etiquette leave this to the discretion of the woman herself, but this does not oblige her to anything. If the gift is unpleasant, you can return it with an explanation that it is not possible to give something of equal value.

If a man brags about his former successes on the personal front, you can safely explain to him that it is unpleasant for a woman to listen to this. As an argument, you can ask a man if he would like a story about a woman’s victories.

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Etiquette rules when meeting parents

When meeting the parents of your other half, you want to make the best impression, remaining yourself and observing the norms of social etiquette.

There is no need to demonstrate your excitement, you should not try to hide it under the guise of feigned bravado and relaxedness, it is better to behave naturally.

It is not customary, when visiting potential relatives for the first time, to start a conversation about the furnishings and interior of the house. When sitting down at a set table, you need to take the place indicated by the owners of the house. Be sure to maintain an upright posture and not relax at the table.

There is no need to be overly active from the very beginning of acquaintance or take the initiative to talk. It is better to behave correctly and modestly and answer questions from the groom’s parents. On the very first day of meeting you should tell about yourself only when the owners themselves ask you to do so.

It would be impolite to refuse the offered treat, otherwise you could seriously offend your potential mother-in-law. It is advisable to try all the treats offered by the hostess and be sure to express admiration for their taste.

You need to try to stretch out one glass of alcohol for the whole evening, without succumbing to the tricks of a cunning father-in-law or father-in-law, making toasts and adding alcohol.

Girls should not smoke when they first meet; young men can only smoke after an invitation from the owner.

If the reason for getting acquainted was any holiday, then you should take care of gifts for parents in advance. You cannot give pets as gifts, except in cases where it is known for certain that a specific animal is required. Perfumes, individual cosmetics and lingerie are also taboo, because only a fairly close person can study the tastes of the housewife. Shirts and ties are given only to relatives, so you should not present them to your future father-in-law or father-in-law on the first day of meeting them. It is better to choose beautiful flowers in neutral packaging and choose a good book.

There is no need to prolong your visit; you cannot stay too long visiting. When leaving home, you need to invite the parents of the bride or groom to visit in return.

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Table manners

Eating etiquette is determined by traditions and national characteristics. But the general rules are the same; every cultured person must know a minimum of them.

Women are invited to the table first, and then men. Being late for lunch and dinner parties is considered unacceptable. They sit at the table, maintaining a certain comfort distance - not close, but not very far either.

When sitting at the dinner table, elbows should not be placed on the table; an exception is sometimes made for women, but only for a short period of time.

Buns and bread are taken by hand, broken, and not cut with a knife. You cannot bite whole pieces of bread; small pieces are broken off. Even children are not allowed to roll bread crumbs into balls or play with cutlery or napkins. When eating, do not tilt your head low over the plate; carefully bring the spoon or fork to your mouth. You need to drink and eat silently, without slurping or sipping loudly. It is indecent to eat quickly, even if a person is very hungry.

The knife should be held with the right hand, and the fork with the left. However, they do not use a knife, according to the rules of etiquette, when eating spaghetti (you need to use a fork and a large spoon), seafood (you need to pick up crayfish with your hands, and prick shrimp with a fork; there are special tweezers for crabs, lobsters, lobsters), fish, jellies and puddings ( You can use a fork or spoon).

When Yuri Gagarin was invited after the flight to a reception with the Queen of England at the palace and was offered a treat, laying out a huge number of different forks and knives on the table, the great cosmonaut was embarrassed. Queen Elizabeth came to his aid, saying that although she grew up in the palace and knew the rules of etiquette by heart, she still did not remember the purpose of all these devices. If at a reception a person does not know how to behave, you can simply observe others or ask for advice.

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Etiquette in a business atmosphere

By observing the rules of etiquette at work, a person forms his own positive, reliable image of a competent, knowledgeable, well-mannered partner. Experienced employers pay special attention to maintaining etiquette.

You need to be punctual and calculate the time correctly. You cannot say too much to others, discuss your employer and colleagues. You should think not only about yourself, but also about the interests of your partners.

You should dress according to the established norms of a particular society. It is imperative to monitor the correctness and purity of speech. Diction, intonation, pronunciation must be clear. It is unacceptable to use obscene words. The ability to listen to your interlocutor is a valuable quality.

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