First wedding night what to do to a girl. Muslim wedding night

Now for most newlyweds, the first wedding night is just a tradition or a formality. This is due to the fact that this is not really the first night of love for everyone. Modern couples often do not wait for legal marriage and live for some time in the status of lovers or in a civil marriage.

But this does not mean that the first marital night should be ordinary and no different from all the previous ones. After the conclusion of the union and the blessing of the parents, you can arrange an extraordinary night, which will be the beginning of a new stage in the relationship and your family.

There were interesting statistics about how the newlyweds actually spend their wedding night, the results are amazing:

• 10% - after you finally managed to retire, imagine, they begin to sort things out. Most often this happens due to the obscene behavior of one of the spouses at the wedding.
• 15% - immediately take up the calculations of their family capital. Make plans for the near future.
• 65% are sleeping. Barely touching the pillow, having managed to say a few words to each other, they plunge into a long-awaited dream.
• 2-3% do things that are strange for the wedding night: they are looking for their missing soul mate all over the city, talking in the kitchen with distant relatives, having fun in the club.

But the remaining 7-8% are passionate about what you need to do on your wedding night.

The tradition was accompanied by a variety of rituals, without which the wedding night itself would have no meaning.

Each new relationship begins with a candy-bouquet period, beautiful and reverent. As a rule, acquaintance is followed by flirting, courtship, then you become closer to each other and your sympathy grows. Gradually, one of the most exciting moments of your relationship is approaching - your first intimacy.

Most likely, this is not the first sexual experience and there is something to compare. But at the moment you are in love with a particular person and you want your first night to make him happy. It is this desire to get closer to the ideal that is the most common mistake. After all, we can see the perfect sex in the cinema, but in reality this is more the exception than the rule. However, you should not be upset, because your partner is most likely far from ideal, he is no less an ordinary person than you. And it will take some time to move to a new level of relationship - sexual intimacy. Today we will talk about the most basic mistakes in the behavior of people during the first night.

Mistakes and delusions, on your first night.

First of all, stop being afraid of disappointment. The first night may have nothing to do with your dreams of her. But quite often the dream is transformed into an obsession. Girls prepare for it especially carefully: they exhaust themselves on simulators, visit massage parlors, and do painful depilation. Nobody argues that this is right and good, but this is not the main thing. More important is the ability to relax in bed with your loved one. After all, he already liked you and it is doubtful that he will consider your flaws, if any, under a microscope.

Men also have a lot of doubts and misconceptions about this. For some reason, many of the representatives of the stronger sex believe that the more varied the postures during intercourse, the more inventive the man is, the more joy his partner will receive from sex. But it should be remembered that the more a man cares about the technique of sex, the more lovemaking becomes like training in acrobatics. And at the same time, you don’t need to endure and hush up that the position is uncomfortable for you, it’s better to make it clear right away.

And, of course, the worst thing for manhood on the first night is a complete sexual fiasco. The reasons for this may be different. For example, he can wind his nerves in such a way in advance that there simply will not be an erection, or ejaculation will occur very quickly. Both outcomes can be the result of strong excitement. It would be good for men to know that for a woman this is not a universal catastrophe, as they think. It’s just that not everyone knows how to properly explain this to a partner and find how to console him.

You just have to remember that sex is a mutual pleasure and that it has nothing to do with sports or the pursuit of records.

The first wedding night is a rare occurrence.

In our time, the concept of "wedding night" has lost its relevance and in its original meaning it is quite rare. Most often, by the onset of this very night, the newlyweds already have some kind of sexual experience that they acquired even before the wedding. Moreover, it is already considered unfashionable to marry virgins. However, there are always exceptions to all rules. We will try to consider various situations and hope to help those who are just gaining their first sexual experience. But we will not touch upon one-time relationships, since the “wedding night” has nothing to do with them.

1. First sexual experience for both. (Romeo and Juliet).

Even though it's hard to imagine now, let's assume that both partners are virgins. And this is really great, since all the brightest impressions and discoveries of the world of sensuality are yet to come for both. A man needs to show special sensitivity and guess the mood of his beloved woman. If she had a desire now, then, then, it is necessary. Even if you hear her "no need", this does not mean that you need to immediately get dressed and leave the bed. Her “no” is most likely due to fear, however, you are afraid too. There is only one way out here: you need to stop pretending and allow yourself to surrender to feelings completely. When the process itself begins, then thoughts will disappear, and a wave of passion will capture you completely. You need to relax and enjoy. Just don't rush things, you'll be fine. Remember that fear and surprise do not suit a man. At such moments, the girl prefers to have a strong and confident man next to her, who can be trusted.

2. Love and arithmetic.

Very often, when acquiring the first experience, a woman relies on male prudence, and a man on female prudence, and that's when an unwanted pregnancy occurs. As a result, unplanned children are born, whom no one expected, and they, having just been born, are negatively disposed towards the world. Therefore, take the advice: always have a condom with you, and, preferably, read the instructions for it. After the first intimacy, it also happens that a woman remains a virgin, since her hymen is elastic enough or too strong, and an inexperienced man cannot break through it. You shouldn't be upset about this. Five or six days will pass and you will be able to continue making love. Men should hold back their fantasies a little. There is an elementary way for this: during frictions, repeat (of course, not out loud) the multiplication table.

3. First sexual experience: an experienced man and a virgin (Petrarch and Laura).

It happens that a man with some fear refers to the opportunity to become a pioneer, because they think that their efforts will be in vain, and the girl is unlikely to experience the joy of orgasm. And the girls, in turn, go for it because it is already “indecent” to be a virgin. If a man does not want to be the first with a girl at all, then all this should be discussed even before the moment of intimacy, and not start clarifying when you are in bed with her. Yes, and girls should voice this dignity in advance, but at the same time, there is no need to express unnecessary emotions in the form of grief or irrepressible joy. Otherwise, the man may simply disappear from her life.

4. Pitfalls of the first sexual experience.

The first sexual experience cannot be considered only as a sexual desire. At this time, female sensuality is born and a man needs to be extremely delicate and careful. The smallest faux pas can cause a negative reflex to sex or even the development of frigidity. According to statistics, in fifty percent of cases, frigidity occurs due to the fact that the partner is rude on the wedding night, in twenty - because of disrespect for her husband, in thirty - because of the fear of pregnancy. It is best for an experienced man to bring a woman to orgasm for the first time without penetration, so that she knows what to expect in the future and strives for it. And then she herself will be glad when you deprive her of innocence.

5. Simple rules for the first night. (Both partners have sexual experience).

Do not think that the tremor of the moment disappears due to previously acquired experience, because this is happening between you for the first time. It is important not to forget about some rules that should be observed in this case. First of all, there must be a mutual desire, the presence of contraceptives and a bed. The latter is necessary in order for the first night to pass comfortably, and leave various extreme sex for later. And further. Try not to be selfish, there should be no race, otherwise you will not achieve sexual harmony.

Men, prepare for the first night carefully.

1. Stock up on red semi-sweet wine or decent champagne. Don't forget a light, delicious dinner. Just don't ask your mom for help, otherwise you'll get meatballs and pea soup. You can offer such a menu to your woman not soon. Let it be fruits and sweets. It would not be superfluous to put mint tablets or bunches of herbs (parsley, dill) on the bedside table. This is necessary so that bad breath (if any) does not cause your sexual incompatibility.

2. Lay out fresh bedding. The sheet is better than the one that has an elastic band, otherwise, it will stray all the time and interfere with you. The fabric of the bed linen should be soft and durable, blue and red shades that excite eroticism are very good. If you are an adherent of white linen, then it should be snow-white, and not creamy, and even more so, not with a complex pattern, otherwise your bedroom will be associated with a hospital ward. By the way, one more clarification: on the first night, you can completely do without pillows and a warm blanket. It is better to use terry sheets and a soft blanket.

3. The presence of fresh flowers near the bed of love is welcome. But they should not have a pronounced aroma to avoid migraine attacks. A bouquet of snowdrops or violets will be appropriate and touching. It should be remembered that aromas especially affect mood. Eliminate perfume, it is better to light an aromatic candle or an aromatic incense burner. Patchouli, juniper are able to excite sensuality. Just do not use lemon oil, otherwise you will quickly be drawn to sleep.

4. You can take care of some soft objects in advance. Fur stimulates erogenous zones very well. A woman will be pleased if you move the fur along her back, buttocks, and legs. You can use wide brushes for these purposes, which are used by artists. You can also purchase aromatic oils for massage.

5. Put new soft washcloths, shower gels, shampoos, bath foam in the bathroom (if you want to soak up the two of you there). As well as two fluffy towels and two soft terry bathrobes. Remember that the dressing gown that is intended for your woman must be new and fit her so that she does not have a thought about her predecessor.

Your efforts will definitely be appreciated and your night will be remembered for many years.

The first wedding night in Russia was arranged in a special way and had a lot of differences from the similar tradition of other nations. Among the peoples of Africa, Europe and India, the right of the first night meant the intimate contact of the bride with an outside man. Often it was the elder of the tribe, a noble gentleman, or even just the first person he met.

In Russia, the right to deprive a girl of her virginity traditionally belonged to her future husband. According to church canons, a married marriage is sacred and any attempt on someone else's marriage bed is a great sin. Later, the feudal lords often neglected this law and enjoyed the right of the wedding night, but the church did not welcome this.

Time spending

The wedding ceremony in Russia was a very complex sacrament that combined Christian and pagan traditions. The timing of the wedding has always been very carefully chosen. For many peoples of the world, the first intercourse of newlyweds could occur on the third or fourth day, or even later (some Muslim countries, India, etc.).

For Russians, the first wedding night took place during the wedding celebration, so it was very important to schedule the wedding on the date allowed by the church. According to Orthodox laws, one cannot have sexual relations during fasting and on church holidays, therefore weddings were not scheduled for this time. The date of the celebration was carefully chosen, in accordance with the church calendar.

wedding night ritual

For the Russian people, the wedding night was called the basement for a long time. This is due to the fact that the bed of the young was always arranged in a cool place: in the basement of the hut, closet, barn or bathhouse. This always happened on the territory of the groom, since the girl after the wedding went to live with him.

For the newlyweds, a high bed was prepared on a strong wooden base. He was covered with bedding, which was taken from the girl's dowry. The preparation of the bed for the bride and groom was done by female bed-makers from among the matchmakers. Also, the mother or sister of the groom could prepare the bed.

Many ritual objects were laid on the bed, which were supposed to protect the newlyweds from damage and provide them with a comfortable existence in the future. Such amulets included small rye sheaves, bags of flour, mattresses, and feather beds. From above the bed was covered with a snow-white embroidered bedspread.

Several logs, a frying pan, a poker, and a juniper branch were placed under the bed of the bed. These items were supposed to protect the couple from all evil spirits. Logs symbolized future offspring, so they had to be put more.

Seeing off the newlyweds

A whole crowd of guests accompanied the newlyweds to the “bedchamber” prepared in this way: friends, matchmakers, relatives, and in general anyone who wanted to take part in a noisy and cheerful action. The farewell was accompanied by songs, obscene jokes and advice. Druzhka beat with a whip on the box, driving out evil spirits. He then had to pay a ransom to the bed-maids.

Alone

After all these rituals, the newlyweds were finally left alone. The door was locked, and a cage guard was left near it. He also had to protect the newlyweds from evil spells and various evil spirits. But the guests often remained at the door and simply spying on the young.

Left alone, the bride and groom first treated themselves to bread and chicken. This food was supposed to give the couple fertility. After eating, the girl was obliged to remove the boots from the guy's feet. Thus, she demonstrated humility in front of her future husband and showed her readiness to obey him in everything. Also, the girl had to ask her husband for permission to lie with him.

Then there must be a sexual intercourse. A friend came to inquire about this several times. As soon as the girl lost her virginity, the marriage was considered physically confirmed, which was loudly announced to all guests. The young could again be taken to the feast and delighted with songs of the most obscene content, or the guests themselves came to the cellar to the newlyweds and remained there with them until dawn.

Innocence as the main attribute

The most important moment in this whole ritual was the demonstration of the bride's shirt with blood stains. If the bride kept her virginity before marriage, she was considered honest. Otherwise, she brought shame not only on herself, but also on her parents. A collar was hung around the neck of the matchmaker and the parents of the dishonest newlywed. Father was brought a glass of wine with a hole in the bottom. The girl could even be returned to her father's house.

The loss of virginity on the wedding night was symbolically celebrated by hanging towels embroidered with red thread and breaking pots. After that, the girl became "young", and the guy - "young". After the wedding night, the young woman was dressed in the clothes of a married woman and put on her appropriate headdress. The whole ritual had to be strictly observed, otherwise the new family was threatened with infertility and poverty.

Preparing for a wedding requires a lot of effort on the part of the bride and groom, as it is necessary to think through a large number of little things. It is necessary to organize everything competently so that both the guests and the newlyweds themselves are satisfied with the celebration. However, after the wedding celebration, another wonderful event awaits the newlyweds - the first wedding night of the newlyweds. It is necessary to organize a honeymoon and the first romantic night in advance so as not to spoil your mood. Finally, you will be left alone after a busy and full of different emotions of the day. You need to relax and enjoy the attention of your loved one.

If you have not yet begun preparations for the first wedding night, the modern wedding portal site will tell you what to do to ensure that this night goes flawlessly. Tune in for an amazing evening full of surprises and romance.

What is the first romantic wedding night?

Many newlyweds do not fully imagine how exactly the wedding night should go and what it symbolizes. The first night of the bride and groom together is a truly romantic time. This night symbolizes the creation of a new family, the transition to new statuses of husband and wife. After exhausting celebrations with dancing and congratulations, the young people finally find themselves alone with each other. This time is devoted only to you two. In the morning, a completely different "adult" life will begin, and this night will be the starting point of your family relationships.

How is the first wedding night: preparation

When the time of the upcoming wedding night approaches, the newlyweds do not know what to do and how to behave. However, this night is practically no different from all those nights that you will spend together after the wedding. The only difference is that on the newlyweds' night, the newlyweds try to please each other with romantic surprises to make it unforgettable. In order for the first love night after the wedding to really leave only joyful memories for the young, you need to carefully prepare for it.

• Groom's preparation. How the first wedding night of the young will pass depends largely on the groom, since it is on his shoulders that the organization of the main issues falls. The most important issue in organizing a romantic night will be finding a suitable place. If you do not have your own accommodation, then you can spend the first wedding night after the wedding in a hotel or in a house on the lake. After the wedding, you need to be alone, in peace and quiet, so a cozy room or a whole house will be the perfect place for you to spend a night together. However, not all young people have this opportunity. Many newlyweds have no idea how to spend their wedding night at home. But parents wish their children only happiness and a speedy replenishment in the family, so they will gladly leave you an apartment for one night, or allocate a room, promising not to disturb. If you don't know where to spend your wedding night, ask your beloved parents for help.



















• Whichever place you choose, it must be carefully prepared in order to surprise your beloved bride. Bedding should be clean and neatly made. You can sprinkle rose petals on the bed and on the floor. Also on the floor you can beautifully light candles in the form of a heart or words of love. You can arrange a romantic dinner in a warm bath, drink champagne and eat some light dessert. A beautiful first wedding night will remain in the memory of your beloved for life, so you should make every effort for this.
















• Bride's preparation. The bride must also carefully prepare for the first night of love. It is necessary to think over a beautiful outfit in which you will appear in front of your loved one. It can be beautiful sexy bridal lingerie for the wedding night, stockings and high heels. Your fiancé must once again make sure that he has chosen a real queen as his wife. The first wedding night should be organized romantically and sensually, so don't be shy about bold outfits. You can also arrange a surprise for your husband and dance a beautiful dance for him to your favorite music. It is worth preparing the movements in advance so that they look natural and organic. It was then that your first wedding night of the bride and groom will become bright and memorable.

The finale of any wedding celebration is the wedding night. Nowadays, the first night of the newlyweds has become a convention that has no value. Now it is considered the norm when newlyweds have sex far before the wedding.

But once the wedding night was accompanied by a whole ritual, different for every nation. We offer a look at the pages of history and remember the customs of the wedding night.

HOW WAS THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IN EUROPE

In the Middle Ages, there was a tradition in European countries according to which the bride had to spend the night not with her husband, but with the feudal lord. Historians give different arguments about the emergence of such a custom. Some argued that the deprivation of virginity is a dangerous procedure, subject only to deities, and the feudal lord took full responsibility for what was happening and protected the spouses from the wrath of the gods.

Others complained about the satisfaction of their sexual needs and the desire to be above everyone else, because the feudal lord could easily refuse ugly brides, and this rule was always followed with beautiful girls. True, at the end of the 16th century, such a custom was abandoned in Switzerland, and in Germany it was replaced with a ransom.

SEX ON THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IN AFRICA

In some tribes of Africa, on the wedding night, it was customary to knock out the girl's two front teeth. It symbolized marriage - something like a wedding ring. Married women were not ashamed of their toothless smile and showed it to everyone, while unmarried women covered their mouths.

In Samoa, the first wedding night had to pass in the circle of sleeping relatives of the bride. Only newlyweds should make love silently so that no one wakes up. Otherwise, a serious scolding from relatives awaited the man. That is why many Samoan men lubricate their bodies with oil before their wedding night: it is easier to break free and the beatings are not so painful.

Sex on the wedding night in North Africa involved intercourse between the bride and guests at the wedding. Each guest had to give the bride a special gift.

There were tribes in which it was customary to deprive girls of virginity at a very young age - before the onset of menstruation. It had to be done by a complete stranger. Most often it turned out to be a traveler passing through the village. If at the time of the onset of menstruation a girl remained a virgin, this was considered a real shame, she could never get married.

In the Bakhtu tribe, which is located in Central Africa, instead of having sex on their wedding night, the newlyweds had to fight until dawn, and then disperse to their parents' houses and sleep off. A strange custom, of course, but every nation has its own cockroaches in the head. The next night, the newlyweds fought again. And so it continued until they pour out all the hatred on each other for years to come. Sometimes these fights ended in death.

Some African peoples had a tradition to carry out the act of defloration with the help of special tools. Such a mini-operation was carried out by the oldest women.

Sometimes this procedure was replaced with a natural one, but it was not the husband who had to deflower the girl, but the father or elder brother of the groom, as well as the priest or elder.

In the Arunto tribe, the friends of the future husband had to deprive the girl of her virginity. The man chose two or three friends, they kidnapped the bride and each of them had sex with her. When a girl loses her innocence, anyone could come to her house in the flesh until the wedding itself and have sex with her in order to take a sample from a newly-made woman.

HOW THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT HAPPENS TO THE MUSLIM

The first wedding night for Muslims has not changed much since ancient times. Most Muslims still have the custom to show the groom's relatives the sheet on which the newlyweds had sex. Blood stains testified to the innocence of the bride, if they were not there, the girl was considered vicious, it was a shame for the whole family. Currently, this rule is observed only in some regions.

Before the wedding night, Muslims must observe a number of customs:

• The first wedding night for Muslims takes place only after the bride transports all the necessary things to her husband's house. Dowry for a girl begins to be collected from an early age, she must have at least 40 blankets and pillows. Bedding must be decorated and hand-sewn (some items may not be purchased)
• Before proceeding with intimacy, a man should put his hand on his wife’s head, praise her, say a few kind words and end the speech with the phrase “In the Name of Allah.” Then, the newlyweds read two ritual prayers, after which the man reads another prayer, in which he asks to bless Allah for a life together and, in case of divorce, help them maintain friendly relations.
• A man must give his wife a lot of sweets and delicious drinks. Honey and milk were considered obligatory products on the table. The husband should be soft and gentle when communicating with his wife, win her over, talk. Indecent sexual relations are prohibited by the Quran. A woman should not push a man away, because this could lead to sad consequences. Also, the newly-made wife should not be indifferent and cold.
• In the morning, after the wedding night, the spouses perform a ritual of washing and start eating. Often they set the table and invite relatives.

HOW THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IS GOING ON FOR THE CHECHEN

For Chechens, the first wedding night takes place on the third day of the wedding. To perform the ritual, the man put on a special suit, which was previously presented to him by the bride's relatives. At this time, the woman should be ready in the bedroom, where her married friends bring her.

Before intimacy, a man should open the Koran and pray to Allah, then close the book with a thick cloth and proceed to deprive his wife of innocence. If the spouses did not know each other before the wedding, sexual intercourse is not a prerequisite on the wedding night, they must first get to know each other.

There should be no one in the room where the newlyweds sleep, not even animals.

THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT OF THE MUSLIMS IN DAGESTAN

For Dagestanis, the first wedding night is held in a special way: it is turned into a rite of martial arts. A man will be worthy of a woman only if he wins. The bride is being prepared for a duel since childhood, and on the wedding night they shaved their heads, lubricated exposed skin with grease, put on clothes with many knots, pulled overalls with a cord that should preserve virginity.

Nobody was allowed to enter the room where the battle took place, it was only possible to eavesdrop and peep. According to ancient customs, the guy was obliged to defeat the girl, and the fight continued until the victory.

If the fight went on for too long, the bride was persuaded to surrender, they specifically did not let her drink and eat, but they did everything for the groom.

The faster a man unties all the knots in his overalls, the faster he can take possession of his wife. The battle took place without weapons, and it was not forbidden to inflict bodily harm.

HOW THE FIRST WEDDING NIGHT GOES WITH GYPSIES

Gypsies, of course, are not the purest nation, but they have been observing their traditions from time immemorial. The first wedding night among the gypsies is called the "Takeaway of honor" and is considered the most important ceremony at the wedding. The bride must keep her virginity before marriage, otherwise, she will dishonor her family. The newlyweds, along with three respected ladies from both families, go to a separate room where they check the bride's innocence.

The sex of the newlyweds takes place without witnesses, but the groom is obliged to take out the veil with traces of virgin blood.

According to another version, three ladies deprive the girl of innocence, with the help of a sheet wound around her finger, so that the newlyweds could not falsify the virginity of the bride. There is another version of the first wedding night among the gypsies - the bride and groom must have the first sexual intercourse on the banquet table in the presence of guests. When the girl's innocence is proved, the ladies put a sheet with traces on a tray, shower it with red ribbons and take it out to the guests. Red ribbons are distributed to the groom's relatives for a fee. After the ceremony, the bride is dressed in a red dress, her braids are braided and the veil is removed.

FIRST WEDDING NIGHT IN RUSSIA

In the times of Ancient Russia, premarital relations were not forbidden - it was a widespread phenomenon. Some young people managed to live with each other and get married, and sometimes they had children. In some settlements, a "trial marriage" was common, in our civil. Young people lived together, shared life, gave birth to their first child, and only then they could get married, if they didn’t change their minds.

Some traditions of Russia were similar to barbarian ones. At the wedding, every man could touch and grope the bride the way it should have happened during the wedding night. The bride could even be stripped down to her undershirt at the wedding to show off all the juice. When the wedding was coming to an end, the young people retired to a separate room, and the guests eavesdropped and peeped under the door so that the newlyweds were busy with each other, and not with sleep.

Sex was supposed to last until the morning, which was facilitated by the guests - they yelled ditties with sexual overtones and spurred the young in every possible way. In the morning, the bride and groom provided evidence of the deprivation of innocence. If the groom did not succeed, he could repeat the attempt two more times, if even then he did not cope with his duty, the groom was replaced by a more experienced man. In some villages, it was customary to spend the wedding night with the groom's older brothers, who came to the aid of the inexperienced groom in case of emergency.

As we can see, the wedding night in many countries involved the deprivation of a girl's virginity, if the girl was vicious before the wedding, her family was disgraced, and the negligent bride could be returned to her parents. True, now any gynecologist will say that during the first sexual intercourse there may not be blood, just like pain, since the hymen is different for everyone.