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Arousal signals are a brilliant idea, one of the most powerful seducer technologies!
It allows you to excite at a distance, but the question arises how to apply them?

One of my friends asked me: "Why, when you communicate with girls, they just "devour" you with their eyes, what are you doing?

The meaning is simple: when communicating with a person, imagine how you are having sex with him, hard! Feel it for yourself, imagine how good you feel, how cool you are, feel it with your whole body! You feel great!
What you need, and now, add active gestures when talking with a person of the opposite sex.
What happens to him at this moment, you ask?

By imagining him having sex with you and using active gestures (they are described below), you evoke a thought in him that briefly appears in his head after using the exciting signal. What thought? Everything is simple! Consciously - a person perceives your gestures as just hand gestures. But on the other hand, unconsciously, thoughts arise in him: "Why am I excited? Why do I want him?"

One of my acquaintances, when we were lying in bed after the first date, talking about how it went, she said that she wanted me in the middle of our date. And just in the middle of the date, I looked into her eyes, imagined and felt with my whole body how hard we had sex, I felt it with every centimeter of my body!
As one of my psychologist friends said: We are all telepaths by nature, i.e. we transmit thoughts at a distance, what you think about, you, after a while, another person will start thinking about the same!

Now imagine yourself in the place of a girl! He doesn't say anything about sex, but I think about it all the time! WHY??? I guess I want it!
Girls version coming out soon

Everything we say to each other- turns into feelings that lead to further relationships, which in turn turn into knowing each other at a deeper level, which marks the continuation of the family.

It is not very difficult if there is a desire to awaken desire. It is?

Read - words and phrases filled with letter magic that excite men:

A man is ignited by his own name

When a woman begins to whisper it ... - with love. It is better to use a diminutive - affectionate declension of the name.

Such words - adjectives, as:

  • "desired",
  • "the only one",
  • "affectionate",
  • "chic".

Call him your favorite. Do it unusually, melodicly, passionately, not forgetting about tenderness.

Repeat: "more, more ...". If only you knew how exciting such repetition is! The man is pleasantly shocked by such words. Do not forget to leave maximum sincerity in these words.

Any words will sound exciting if you catch the right moment, if you choose the right environment.

Now - more about this.

Places to say words

In addition to the standard places filled with romanticism, those places in which there is a lot of extremeness really ignite a man. In a car, in an elevator, at the entrance, in a toilet, in a hotel, in nature, in a restaurant. And it's not all places! Shower, bathroom, swimming pool - these are no less extreme places.

Choose a moment when a man's eyes will shine and shine, when you feel that he is ready to give his whole life for you. This is where he got in! How did you get it! You can act without missing a moment.

Speak these compliments to wake up a man

This is very "turns on" a man

Words and phrases that are accompanied by "rapid" breathing and sighs. If there are light groans - a man generally goes crazy from his ignition! Try to regulate it somehow, but make sure that everything is as natural as possible. If a woman pretends - a man will feel!

What can ruin everything:

  • Talk in bed

Try not to talk about something abstract, although it may seem important to you. Here, silence is more “on topic”!

You speak, whisper something to him, and then .... Some noise! It is not clear where it comes from, but it is unbearably annoying. Try to anticipate this by eliminating it in advance.

  • Physiological "call"

He was "impatient", not very timely, to the toilet. You would have suffered for him. And the man will not endure. Naturally, you will also lose the desire to say something to him when he returns.

  • Phone ring

Turn off your mobile phones so that they do not become an unpleasant surprise. Let them rest while you enjoy each other.

  • Doorbell

It is better not to turn it off, because anything can happen. But you choose the time when someone's visit is the minimum chance. Force majeure does not count. Suddenly, someone makes a mistake with the door (by drunk, or by mistake).

  • Alarm
  • Clothing with "intricacies"

While he will undress you, he will get tired, confused, crazy. Choose erotic clothes, but “understandable” for your man. Otherwise it will be torn by your loved one. Torn from passion! Has it already turned you on?

  • Remote controller

Clean up the room so that you don't stumble upon anything when he kisses you, and you whisper the most tender words in response. And then you turn on the TV by accident. You don't need him. He is the third!

  • sports broadcasts

Make a man forget about everything! Even about your favorite football, hockey, basketball. Your words are more important. And do not think about the stereotype that sports are more expensive than anything else for a man.

  • Pets

Close the door to the room you are in. And then your beloved cat will come running to you, jump between you and you will frightenedly forget all the words. No need to so ridiculously lose the romance of the moment!

Women's words about men's words:

If he loves, he will turn himself on!

Kira: “If he loves, any word said looking into men's eyes will excite him. Personally, I have already checked this, because I also worried about this issue.

Password - "I want you"

Olga: “One word“ I want ”is enough! Nothing more needs to be said. You can, of course, say more if you want. But the word "want" is the most powerful word."

My favorite "dragging" from touch

Ekaterina: “Words don’t excite my man at all. He reacts more to touch than to "literacy". I'm glad for that too! It is worth touching - he flew away.

Could be sooner

Carolina: “Men are excited by platitudes and vulgarities. I often use this. It is wrong that I treat everything without originality. But, it seems to me, a man does not care what methods women use to arouse him. The main thing is the result!

Svetlana: “All words excite a man if he loves. If not, no matter how hard you try, nothing will work. Everything is simple. Need love. She constantly “rules” everything without words. But not everyone appreciates love, because they put the “contact” itself in the first place. Men especially. For example, I value declarations of love much more than recognition that my beloved wants me. My girlfriends are too. Maybe we, so non-standard, should move to another planet? Although - not the fact that with all this there will be complete order!

How can you affectionately call a guy? -

Centuries of interest in sex has led to the discovery of the exciting effect of a number of products. They excite the taste, smell, chemical composition, appearance of food (or these properties in some particular combination). Each nation has a list of such products has several dozen names. They can excite passion, prolong the period of sexual activity, and so on. One culinary recipe even claims that a man who tastes this dish will have an erection for a whole month. This is, of course, a clear exaggeration. However, many products do deserve a reputation for stimulating. Some of them are listed below. The author has experienced their effect on himself and, speaking frankly, is forced to agree with gastronomic voluptuaries.

Almonds, often referred to as the "king of nuts". Almonds are rich in riboflavin, protein, vitamin E and calcium. It has been used by Hindus, Arabs and Chinese for centuries to maintain sexual potency. Ayurveda, the classic Indian book on health, notes that almonds are good food for the brain, an aphrodisiac; its oil renews the cerebrospinal fluid.

Marzipan, a sweet almond mass, is a gourmet dessert considered particularly energizing. Almonds grow in the East, in Italy, Spain, California and enjoy such a reputation everywhere.

Artichokes are the mysterious artichoke. This is a captivating food. The artichoke, probably larger than all other fruits, except for papaya, resembles a vagina; its numerous leaves are like multi-layered lips covering the core - tender and fresh, protected by a silky skin. Artichokes are highly valued by the French; in their opinion, they "warm up the genitals." When cooked, they give a huge amount of waste. Only the lower raw leaves are eaten, the rest is thrown away. Artichokes stuffed with marinated shrimp are a love food that gives an unforgettable experience.

Asparagus (asparagus) is a time-tested cure for prostate diseases. Asparagus is shaped like a phallus. Asparagine contains asparagine, a well-known diuretic that stimulates the ureters. Tender shoots are cut and eaten in spring. The younger the shoot, the more tender it is. Cook asparagus for a short time without overcooking. Rich in vitamin A, phosphorus, calcium and potassium, asparagus is rightfully considered an energizing food.

Avocado. This fruit got its name from the Aztecs, who called the testicles that way. Indeed, avocados hanging from a tree look like male testicles. Avocado is a highly nutritious fruit, rich in proteins, vitamin A, potassium and essential fatty acids, and successfully replaces meat in the diet. Avocado is one of the components of salads. It is also finely rubbed or served pureed, like guacamole, a Mexican favorite. Its popularity has gone beyond Mexico. The stimulating effect of avocado has long been known. These fruits were delivered to Louis XIV, who suffered from sexual impotence. There are many varieties of this fruit, the most nutritious of which is haas, which grows in California.

Banana. Due to its phallic shape, the banana has always been the "hero" of many jokes. Bananas are rich in potassium and natural sugars. Ayurveda lists the banana as an aphrodisiac. One of the recipes for an exciting banana dish: layer them with curry with butter and walnuts. Eaten at breakfast, this dish will excite your sexual appetite for the whole day.

Bee pollen. It is a "superfood", it contains almost all known nutrients - rich in amino acids, vitamins, mineral salts, RNA, DNA and anti-aging superoxide dismutase. Bee pollen is used by athletes all over the world to improve strength and endurance. A survey of centenarians in Russia found that they have been eating bee pollen in huge amounts for years, creating a dynamic nutritional foundation for a long healthy life. In terms of arousing sexual interest, bee pollen is one of the most effective products.

Caviar is a delicacy, and its price confirms this. Some people consider caviar to be the main "love" food. A female sturgeon can produce as much as 100 pounds of caviar at a time - an astonishing fecundity. Aristocrats from the time of Casanova to the present day considered caviar the best delicacy in bed. Like all eggs, caviar is high in protein and easy to digest. It is difficult to deny its special stimulating effect on the genitals,

Coconut. Ayurveda claims that coconut increases sperm count and cleanses the bladder. Walnut pulp, viscous, rich in oil, is eaten in the tropics instead of meat. Indian doctors recommend it as a valuable food for fatigue caused by chronic diseases. Coconut milk with honey quenches thirst, improves digestion, increases sexual appetite. A drink of pineapple juice, fresh papaya and grated fresh coconut is a delicious, rejuvenating and refreshing breakfast that replenishes enzymes and arouses sexual interest.

Dates. The sweetest fruit on earth. They grow in Africa, Central Asia, southern California. Dates are the main food in many areas of the tropics and deserts, where tall and slender date palms protect from the scorching sun. According to Ayurveda, dates purify the blood and increase sperm count. Their sugar content, useful for prolonged sex, may be the reason why dates are considered a "love" food. Date rolls are a classic stimulant food. These are finely chopped, pureed dates wrapped in pieces of coconut and filled with blanched almonds. Wow!

Eggs. Eggs are a protein product that has been used for centuries as a sexual stimulant. Before love joys, Kazakova ate them with pleasure. Ayurveda calls eggs "instantly firming". Sheikh Nafzaee, author of The Fragrant Garden, recommended eating as many fried eggs as possible in order to provide yourself with "fuel" for an energetic endless love marathon. Egg liqueur (eggs mixed with milk, cream, honey, vanilla and nutmeg) is a "love" dessert (if it exists at all). Eggs can be used to make many delicious dishes. Just try to buy fresh eggs.

Garlic - fu, what a smell! Yes. But thanks to its famous smell, garlic is a particularly valuable "love" food. It is widely used in oriental and Indian medicine and is also known as "Russian penicillin" due to its amazing natural antibiotic properties. As a love "filter", garlic can generally be called a legendary product. It is used by Italians (they are known to be good lovers) and is indispensable in gourmet cuisine. However, if you want to use garlic to stir up passion, do not forget that the intended partner must also eat it, so that the breath of one does not cause hostility in the other. Garlic fried in oil with eggs is a traditional dish before love all night.

Ghee - clarified butter that has been skimmed off the cream - is the basis of Indian cuisine. It is often used in place of cooking oil in curries, vegetables, and other dishes. It is believed that ghee improves eyesight, appetite, strengthens memory, increases the amount of sperm and seminal fluid, kindles sexual fire. Ghee is easy to digest and adds a subtle flavor to dishes cooked with it. It is the main component of all Indian "love" dishes. To make ghee, heat a pound or more of butter in a saucepan to melt it. Then carefully remove the milk foam with a spoon. Well-clarified ghee has a long shelf life.

Honey. It is sometimes called the food of the gods. Honey is a sweet elixir that bees produce from flower nectar. There are hundreds of honey fragrances - they depend on the flowers from which the bees have collected nectar. All of these scents are unique, from heavy, deep chestnut honey to light, lip-hydrating lavender and wild thyme. Honey is especially revered for the effect it has on sexual life. He is the best restorer of sexual energy and is included in all recipes for exciting dishes, along with nuts, fruits, eggs, meat. Honey can only be eaten natural, unheated and not filtered, retaining its natural taste.

Laminaria (seaweed). Who would have thought that ordinary seaweed would be on a par with the most exotic products that stimulate sexuality? Kelp is highly nutritious and, like pollen, contains all the necessary nutrients. The richness of mineral salts allows it to transform ordinary or weakened glands into small emitters of hormones. Seaweed is cooked with vegetables or fish and is especially tasty in its own juice. Daily use of kelp will help you stay in shape for a long time.

Mango. If the word "divine" can be attributed to a fruit, then this is an accurate description of a mango. Juice will run down your lips as you eat this juicy and sweet tropical wonder. Mango grows in India. In Ayurveda, it is noted as easily digestible, strengthening and exciting. Mango is clearly similar to the testicles, which excites the imagination and desire.

Mushrooms. Mushrooms, whose hat, which looks like an umbrella and the head of a penis at the same time, rises above a slender leg, are shrouded in centuries-old legends, fears and conjectures. Edible, hallucinogenic and even poisonous, in the folklore of many countries, they were considered to stimulate the gift of prophecy and messengers of death. Many believe that soma - the legendary substance of cosmic vision - is actually just the hallucinogenic mushroom Amanita Muscaria. Mushrooms used to be the food of the elite. Now they are grown in large quantities. Soups, salads, gravies, sauces are prepared from them. In general, they are low-nutrient, but contain a lot of zinc. It is believed that mushrooms are a source of sexual energy.

Okra (lady's fingers). Arabs have long eaten it with sauce. The black slaves who brought okra to New Orleans, where it became widespread as the main ingredient in goomba (a leguminous plant) meat dishes, believed that it ignited the sexual fire. Okra is now popular in the southern United States, commonly added to dough. Ayurveda recommends soft, tender okra as a rejuvenating, tonic and energizing food.

Olive oil. The most nutritious of all vegetable oils and the best digested. It can be stored for a long time without heating and does not become rancid. Rich in essential fatty acids, olive oil provides complete nourishment for healthy sex organs. Pure olive oil, pressed from olives, is better than all other oils. The Greeks first of all drink a sip of olive oil in the morning, and then a large spoonful of fresh honey to flush the bile ducts and fill the genitals with strength. Olive oil with tarragon vinegar is great for marinating mushrooms. Natural olive oil is one of the healthiest foods. It is a good cosmetic product. The peoples of the Mediterranean for many centuries used it in religious rituals for anointing.

Onion. Everyday product. Its subspecies are pearl, white, yellow, Spanish and Bermuda. This most common, well-known vegetable stands at the top of the pyramid of products that give a person sexual power. Called the "musk of the poor", onions are praised in Ayurveda as a diuretic - as well as a tonic, stimulant, blood cleanser and aphrodisiac. In the Islamic, Chinese, European and Indian love tradition, no product is used as widely as onions. In gravies, smoked meats, in roasts, minced, cut into rings and even in the form of an oka, onions are considered an excellent way to maintain sexuality. Its use is prohibited in monasteries. But in the home pantry, it is necessary.

Oysters. These small mollusks enjoy well-deserved fame. Casanova, Napoleon, Louis XIV, King Henry IV, Rabelais, Voltaire and many other celebrities spoke about them with enthusiasm. The high content of phosphorus and zinc strengthens their reputation, making them sexually beneficial for both men and women. Many doctors support and even approve of the use of oysters as an aphrodisiac food. Oysters are eaten in large quantities. There have always been plenty of men (we fall prey to stupid ideas much faster than women) who tried to portray themselves as the biggest oyster eaters and therefore the best lovers. Such a gastronomic competition is meaningless. A wiser plan is to dine moderately on oysters with your loved one and move on to dessert.

Pistachios. In Central Asia and India, it is believed that pistachios excite sexuality. Currently, they are actively cultivated in California. They are also said to purify the blood. Pistachios with honey revive love attraction.

"Oysters from the Rocky Mountains". This name was given to the testicles of a calf. You can find a roasted one on the menu of many roadside cafes in Colorado. The idea of ​​eating them takes some getting used to, but in fact they are no different from other parts of the bull. The only difference is that you will feel more of a sexual high from Rocky Mountain Oysters than from a steak.

Sesame seed. Sesame is highly valued. Some peoples endow it with mystical properties. Sesame seeds are very nutritious. It is widely used in India and other Eastern countries. Sesame seed contains high amounts of vitamin E and perhaps for this reason it is widely known as a food for manly men. In India, sesame is believed to lengthen life. Tahini, ground seed oil, is an excellent meat substitute. It is advised to use it with honey to increase sexual activity. Halva is made from ground sesame and honey, famous in the East for its stimulating properties.

Snails. Land, freshwater and sea snails are considered a delicacy in many countries. In France, they prepare escargot - a dish of snails, the effect of which on sexual activity puts it on a par with garlic, mushrooms and oysters. Luckily, snails are available and don't have the same price tag as caviar or truffles. Until now, the legend of Julius Caesar's love for snails has not been forgotten. Cooked in butter with mushrooms or served in coriander sauce, snails can excite even the most tired glands, awakening the strongest sexual desire.

Truffles. How rare and precious they are! You are unlikely to find them at your favorite restaurant nearby. No, it's actually food for the rich. But, mind you, they are the best stimulating food, leaving behind even caviar and oysters. Truffles are small, soft underground mushrooms. They grow in the forests of Western Europe and the Pacific Northwest. They have never been cultivated, which thickens a mystical halo around them and increases their price. In ancient Greek and Roman manuscripts, there are recipes for making truffles that extol their aphrodisiac properties. Famous voluptuaries, including Casanova and Louis XIV, noted that truffles have a special taste that cannot be described in words. However, truffles are becoming less and less due to environmental pollution, to which these small mushrooms are so sensitive. It is possible that most people will never try them.

Wheat sprouts. The most nutritious part of its grains. Sprouts are a well known "health food". They are rich in vitamin E, the famous "sex" vitamin, as well as ostacosanol, a well-known spermatogenic factor. Wheatgrass increases sexual activity and changes the sex life in such a way that it is hard not to notice. Whatever you eat them with, wheat sprouts work great. Buy them vacuum-packed, otherwise they will spoil and taste bitter. Germ oil is also available. One daily sip of oil is enough for a long high-speed love flight.

Wild rice. It's actually not rice at all. It is a wild bulrush-like aquatic plant found in the swampy regions of the central United States. It is extremely expensive and is served in small quantities as a delicacy. It is often used as a pie filling or cooked with brown rice. Wild rice has an amazing, incomparable taste. And he has a fairly strong reputation as "love food." Try it with gravy and stuffed mushrooms and enjoy its rejuvenating and energizing effects.

Herbs and spices

Herbs and spices have a magical effect on the taste of food. Trading them to this day is associated with travel, adventure, risk and danger. In ancient times, people traveled great distances to get these magical plants. You may ask why all this fuss? Spices are treasures. They excite the taste in the same way that precious stones caress the eye. Herbs and spices add spice to food, remind of other worlds, the existence of miracles and beauty. Many spices are famous for their stimulating effect. Whether it is purely chemical in nature, based on aroma or some other elusive property, but their effect is sometimes difficult to describe. For many centuries, certain herbs and spices have been widely used precisely because of their ability to stimulate love appetite. Below are ten spices that have long been used to get into a romantic and aroused state.

Carnation. Dry, unopened buds of a small evergreen tree have been added to food hundreds of years ago by the ancient Romans and Chinese. Cloves are the most fragrant of all spices. It grows mainly in Western India and the islands near Africa and is used to flavor fruit dishes, cider, desserts and stews.

Coriander. Similar to cumin, coriander is often used in Indian cuisine. It has a sweet taste and is therefore added to cakes, gingerbread, brisket, sauces and curries.

Curry powder. This is not a herb or spice, but a combination of many seasonings (the proportions depend on the taste of the compiler). The main ingredients of curry are turmeric, cumin, coriander, red pepper, shambhala, cloves, etc. Curry powder is like a gun that hits without a miss: you can't help but like it. Curry is used in sauces, bean, egg and meat dishes.

Fennel. This herb has a long and turbulent history. Sweet fennel stalks are eaten like parsley and seasoned with Italian, Spanish dishes, fish and soups. According to Indian folk medicine, a drink made from fennel boiled in milk rewards the drinker with special sexual virtues.

Ginger. Tropical perennial plant. Widely distributed in Fuji, Jamaica, Hawaii, India and Malaysia. Its root, candied or ground, is used as food. It is believed that ginger improves appetite, facilitates digestion. Fresh ginger has a pungent taste, in large quantities it seems sweet. Boiled ginger root tea with honey is a legendary refreshing drink. Ginger is widely used in Indian, Chinese and Japanese cuisine. It is added to apple sauces, pastries, cakes and bread.

Nutmeg. Tropical evergreen seeds. Nutmeg is used in dracheny, egg liqueur, puddings, pumpkin puree, fruit dishes and milk sauces. In large quantities, it is a strong hallucinogen and weakens the body. We do not recommend adding it in large quantities - just sprinkle a little nutmeg on your omelet.

Rosemary. The fragrant leaves of this tall Mediterranean evergreen tree are associated with passionate love. Ophelia says in "Hamlet": "Here is rosemary, this is for memory." It is added to fish, soups and salads.

Rose petals. What could be more romantic than rose petals? The rose is a universally recognized symbol of love. Petals are eaten with fruits, drachens and cakes. Rose water is used in drinks, baths and after-bath douches.

Saffron. This is perhaps the most expensive of the spices and one of the most wonderful. The brilliant orange stamens of this Asian flowering plant of the lily family are eaten; just a few sprigs of saffron can give an extraordinary flavor to a whole pot of rice. Saffron is used in cooking, as a medicine and as a natural dye. It is commonly added to rice, curries, pies, liver and chicken.

Garden savory. Commonly cultivated in vegetable gardens and orchards, savory is a savory green herb added to soups, eggs, fish, stuffings, and cabbages.

Caraway. Cumin is highly valued for its delicate aroma. It was used in the treatment of diseases of the lungs and digestive tract in ancient Greece, rubbed into whiskey. Cumin is added to brisket, soups, sauces and toppings.

Vanilla. plant of the orchid family. The fruits of some of its species were used by the Aztecs. Vanilla is commonly added to baked goods, desserts, and liqueurs; Indians boiled it in milk and drank it as a sexual tonic.


I didn't think there were so many!

But if you judge like that, then you can take any object, add the word "philia" to it, and you get another disorder.

Karoch, look for your sexual disorders ....

1. Abasiophilia - love or sexual attraction to paralyzed or lame people who wear metal leg prostheses or other orthopedic products
2. Agalmatophilia - sexual attraction to statues, mannequins or other immovable objects
3. Adolesentilism - sexual pleasure in imitating the actions and image of a teenager
4. Ailurophilia - sexual attraction and affection for cats
5. Acarophilia - sexual pleasure derived from tickling or scratching
6. Aquaphilia - excitement from water and / or water space, including baths and pools


7. Acomophilia - sexual attraction to nudity (including shaved genitals)
8. Acrotomophilia - passion for amputation and / or sexual attraction to people with amputated limbs
9. Acousticophilia - sexual arousal from specific sounds
10. Algolagnia - sexual satisfaction experienced when inflicting pain on a sexual partner
11. Amaurophilia - sexual arousal experienced by a person when having sex in complete darkness or with a blindfold
12. Andromimetophilia - attraction to women who dress like men and imitate them, as well as to transsexuals
13. Apodisophilia - a rarely used term for exhibitionism, the desire to undress in a public place
14. Apothemnophilia - desire or sexual arousal from amputation of a healthy part of the body (limbs, fingers or genitals) or partial (complete) cutting of the genitals along
15. Arethifism - attraction to people who do not wear shoes. Antonym: retifism - shoe fetish
16. Asphyxiophilia - sexual attraction to suffocation; also a form of breath control play; includes autoerotic suffocation
17. Autoabasiophilia - the desire to be lame or crippled
18. Autoagonistophilia - sexual arousal from being the subject of public attention or from creating conditions under which such public observation is possible
19. Autoassassinophilia - sexual pleasure from fantasizing or imitation of one's own murder
20. Autogynephilia - sexual perception of oneself as a woman
21. Autonefiophilia, aka diaper fetishism - sexual arousal from diapers, diapers and diapers
22. Biastophilia - sexual satisfaction from rape, no matter in what role; see also Raptophilia
23. Vincilagnia - sexual arousal from bondage
24. Vomerophilia, aka Emetophilia - sexual arousal associated with vomit
25. Vorarephilia - sexual desire to be eaten and / or to eat another person or creature
26. Voyeurism - sexual attraction to spying on people having sex, naked or undressing
27. Galactophilia, aka Lactophilia - sexual attraction to the milk of a woman or a breastfeeding lady
28. Harpaxophilia - sexual desire to be robbed
29. Hematophilia - an erotic attraction to blood (either to the fluid itself, or to the presence of blood on a partner); not to be confused with hemophilia, poor blood clotting.
30. Gerontophilia - sexual attraction to the elderly
31. Hybristophilia - sexual satisfaction from intimacy with criminals, especially those who have committed serious crimes
32. Gynemimetophilia - attraction to men in women's clothes and transsexuals
33. Gynophagia - sexual arousal from fantasies related to cooking and eating women
34. Hypephilia - a passion for tissues
35. Homeovestism - sexual satisfaction from dressing someone else's clothes of a person of the same sex
36. Dakrayphilia - sexual pleasure achieved through tears or sobs of a partner
37. Dendrophilia - sexual attraction to trees and other large plants
38. Veiled incestophilia - arousal from non-contact sexual behavior with a child
39. Zelophilia - sexual arousal from jealousy
40. Zoosadism - sexual pleasure from causing pain and suffering to animals
41. Bestiality - emotional or sexual attraction to animals
42. Infantilism - sexual pleasure achieved by dressing, behaving or referring to oneself as a child
43. Incestophilia - sexual attraction to members of one's family
44. Catoptronophilia - sexual desire to have sex in front of a mirror
45. Kleptophilia - sexual satisfaction achieved by stealing
46. ​​Enemaphilia - sexual pleasure from enemas
47. Coprophilia - sexual arousal from feces
48. Componophilia - sexual pleasure from buttons
49. Crash fetish - sexual arousal from contemplation of crushing small objects by a person of the opposite sex
50. Xenophilia - sexual attraction to foreigners
51. Xylophilia - sexual attraction to a tree, wood
52. Lipophilia - sexual attraction to overweight and obese people.
53. Masochism - sexual satisfaction from the humiliation and suffering caused by a sexual partner
54. Mayesiophilia - sexual attraction to pregnant women and childbirth
55. Macrophilia - sexual attraction to large people and large objects, including huge female organs: large breasts and genitals
56. Mechaphilia - passion for mechanisms, machines, especially robots or androids
57. Misophilia - sexual attraction to dirty, dirty and unclean objects or people
58. Microphilia - sexual attraction to small people and small objects
59. Minifellaphilia - sexual attraction to very small people
60. Nasophilia - sexual pleasure from contemplating and touching the human nose
61. Narratophilia - sexual pleasure from telling erotic and exciting stories
62. Necrosophilia
63. Necropedophilia - sexual attraction to the corpses of children
64. Necrophilia - sexual attraction to corpses
65. Nepiophilia, aka Infantophilia - sexual attraction to young children, from three years old and younger
66. Olafactophilia - sexual pleasure derived from smells and aromas
67. Parthenophilia - sexual attraction to virgins
68. Pediophilia - sexual attraction to dolls
69. Pedophilia - sexual attraction to minors
70. Pecattyfilia - sexual arousal from a committed misconduct and / or guilt
71. Pictophilia - a passion for illustrated pornography and erotic art in general
72. Pyrophilia - sexual pleasure from contemplation, talking and thinking about fire
73. Plushophilia - sexual attraction to plush toys or people in plush suits
74. Raptophilia - sexual pleasure from the idea of ​​being raped
75. Retifism - sexual attraction to shoes
76. Savantophilia - sexual attraction to mentally retarded people
77. Sadism - sexual satisfaction from the humiliation and torment of others
78. Saliromania
79. Celebrity - a pathological desire for sex with a celebrity
80. Symphorophilia - sexual pleasure from staging some kind of misfortune, for example, an accident
81. Sitophilia - sexual attraction to food
82. Scatology on the phone - sexual desire to call strangers and say obscene things
83. Skediafilia, aka Tunophilia - passion for cartoons and their characters
84. Scoptophilia - sexual pleasure from the contemplation of people having sex
85. Somnophilia - sexual attraction to sleeping people and people in a faint
86. Spectrophilia - sexual attraction to ghosts
87. Stygiophilia - sexual satisfaction from the mere thought of going to hell
88. Stigmatophilia - sexual attraction to people with tattoos or scars on the body
89. Telephonicophilia - sexual satisfaction from frank conversations on the phone
90. Teratophilia - sexual attraction to ugly and ugly people
91. Transvestism - sexual pleasure from dressing the clothes of the opposite sex
92. Trichophilia - sexual arousal from hair
93. Troilism - sexual satisfaction from watching one's sexual partner having sex with another
94. Tunophilia, aka Skediaphilia - a passion for cartoons and their characters
95. Urolagnia - sexual arousal from urine
96. Falloorchoalgolania - sexual satisfaction obtained from painful stimulation of male organs
97. Faunophilia - sexual arousal from the contemplation of mating animals
98. Phecophilia
99. Anorexia fetish - passion for very thin women suffering from anorexia
100. Wind fetish - sexual desire to feel the breath of the wind
101. Gigantopithecus fetish - sexual attraction to extremely tall people
102. Wing fetish - sexual attraction to wings; often to the wings of angels or demons
103. Formicophilia - sexual arousal from small insects crawling on the body (usually on the genitals)
104. Forniphilia - sexual objectification, in which the human body takes the form of furniture (chair, table, wardrobe, and so on)
105. Frotterism - obtaining sexual satisfaction by rubbing or touching the body of another person without his knowledge
106. Chrematistophilia - sexual arousal from paying for intimate services or deprivation of money when robbed by a mistress; see also Harpaxophilia
107. Exhibitionism, aka Peodeictophilia - the achievement of sexual satisfaction by demonstrating a naked body, buttocks and genitals
108. Emetophilia, aka Vomerophilia - sexual arousal associated with vomit
109. Emoaningfilia - sexual arousal from textual imitations of moaning, when communicating using an instant text messaging service
110. Enditophilia - the desire to have sex in clothes
111. Eproctophilia - sexual arousal caused by the emission of intestinal gases (farting)
112. Erotophonophilia, aka Homicidophilia or Lust murderism - sexual arousal from committing or attempting to commit murder
113. Ephebophilia, aka Hebephilia - sexual attraction to teenagers

START MALE EXCITATION

One of the striking differences between male sexuality and female sexuality is its active, predatory nature, seeking a point of application. Due to the greater scarcity of female eggs compared to male sperm, evolution has given males the responsibility of finding, chasing and competing for the favor of females, while the latter play a relatively passive, albeit very sensitive role in choosing a partner. This means that males need (evolutionists prefer the term preferentially) to have a more responsive, more sensitive arousal system - at least one that is always ready for action.

Among the most obvious manifestations of an easily aroused male “starter” is the greater frequency of masturbation among boys (compared to girls) and their greater interest in viewing nudity, pornography, etc. Erotic magazines for men sell millions of copies annually, while women's reflection This stereotype has never been particularly popular with women. (Even "Playgirl" would not survive commercially without male buyers, while romantic romance novels are always on the bestseller lists.) Male fantasies also have a "pornographic" tinge, focusing more on group sex scenarios and such anonymous visual details as the size of the mammary glands, pubic hair and the color of underwear than on the personality and feelings of the participants.

Table 2.1. Key elements of anonymously reported sexual fantasies (%). (The bars are over 100% in aggregate, as the categories are not mutually exclusive.) [From Wilson, 1987]

Sexual deviations (paraphilias)- an almost exclusively male phenomenon, and they manifest themselves as persistent hypertrophies of typical male sexuality. The aim of paraphilia is usually impersonal, more often of a visual-fetishistic and sadomasochistic nature and requires frequent changes of images in order to avoid addiction. We will return to this in this chapter. (See Symons, 1979; Wilson, 1981a, 1989 for a fuller picture of differences in male and female sexual excitability.)

FUNDAMENTALS OF MALE SEXUALITY

Particularly striking in the "programs" of sexual arousal of a man is the early period of their probable occurrence. Together with their persistence, this suggests that they represent a variant of imprinting.

A growing body of evidence suggests that the rough outline of a biologically appropriate sexual target (a woman of reproductive age) is stored innately somewhere between the limbic region and the temporal cortex of the male brain. In Jung's terminology, this would correspond to an "archetype" or "racial memory", but since aspects of the phenomenon under consideration in evolutionary terms may originate from the era of reptilian dominance on Earth, they are perhaps best understood within the framework of an ethological concept. innate trigger mechanism (ITM). It seems that all animals, from stickleback to humans, have nerve cells (or circuits) programmed for survival stimuli. Examples are the color red, the cry of a baby, or the outline of a human face. The primary VZM for male sexual arousal is the visual outline of paired, pink, bodily hemispheres separated by a mysterious dark cleft (although certain tactile and olfactory (pheromone-related) stimuli can also act as innate triggers).

While these VZMs define the main landmarks of erotic stimuli, they can be further refined or modified. imprinting in early childhood. Just as ducklings are programmed to follow the first moving object they see that resembles their mother in a number of visual aspects, and adult drakes mate according to the same imprinting, so men tie their sexual responses to certain stimuli found in the environment that most closely resemble innate clichés. Usually this is a woman (especially her breasts and genitals), but a failure of the process is also possible, which can be one of the sources of fetishism, sadomasochism, pedophilia and various other “paraphilias”.

The emergence of sexual targets in early childhood is supported by many diverse observations:

A. The choice of partners who, in certain aspects, resemble the parent of the opposite sex.

B. Deviant sex targets are associated with temporal lobe damage in the first three years of life.

b. Most fetishists remember that the future fetish worried them from early childhood.

G. Many deviations contain infantile components (diapers, dolls, comforters, passing urine, punishments, etc.), suggesting their origin in critical experiences or periods of childhood.

The sexual target imprinting theory explains why objects of fetishism usually closely resemble women and their genitals. Pink, red and black colors and flesh-like fabrics are preferred - leather, rubber, silk. Women's intimate items are also common objects of fetishism due to their close association with women (and possibly adsorbing their pheromones). Since parents usually apply punishment at the same time that boys are imprinted with sexual targets, it is not surprising that such elements of sadomasochism as belts, whips, punishment and humiliation are often included in sexual arousal programs. The much more frequent fetishism of high-heeled shoes compared to women's hats may be based on the leather material of the shoes, but the fact that the shoes are more conspicuous to the crawling child is also likely.

Among the clinically observed fetishes, Chalkey and Powell (1983) noted one very idiosyncratic one, centered on plucked chickens. At first glance, this seems funny, but if we recall the definition of the VZM as paired, pink, fleshy hemispheres, then even the size is roughly reproduced!

This sensory connection between the objects of fetishism and the alleged IDM for sexual arousal is one of the reasons why the imprinting model is preferred to the “conditioned reflex” interpretation, suggesting that we are sexually aroused by stimuli that simply happen to be associated with innate active reflexes (like Pavlov’s dogs salivating at the signal of a bell ). And, although some researchers have demonstrated experimentally induced cases of conditioned reflex sexual arousal, the theory of conditioned reflexes does not explain why the objects of fetishism that form in the natural environment almost always have a close relationship with women. The clinic knows no fetishism in relation to lawn mowers, but many men are turned on by rubber and leather. The conditioned reflex theory does not explain why fetishists are represented almost exclusively by men, and also why “unconditioned stimuli” (real women) cease to act excitatory after the development of a conditioned reflex, or why a conditioned reflex (fetishism) is so resistant to extinction. Usually conditioned reflexes, if they are not reinforced by unconditioned stimuli, die out after a while.

In these and some other aspects, the conditioned reflex theory cannot explain the origin of male sexual arousal. On the other hand, a model that recognizes innate triggers altered in early infancy by imprinting explains the known facts quite satisfactorily. Male targets (both normal and fetishistic) are established early in life, are exceptionally rigid, are closely associated with IBD, and occur more often in the absence of the latter than in its presence.

This definition of fetishism may seem like a departure from its stated goal of describing “normal” male arousal, but the emphasis is on the fact that the ideal fantasies/desires/targets of normal males have a visual-fetishistic quality and there is an ongoing relationship between clinical fetishism and normal male sexuality. Men are "turned on" by partners who meet certain sensory criteria (eg, long dark hair, large pink breasts, shaved pubis, etc.). Their sexual arousal is determined by similar types of women (although in cases of idiosyncrasy - different for each individual man) rather than solely by the personality of the particular woman with whom they are in love. Thus, men are able to respond to the feelings of (and may indeed desire) many different partners during their lifetime, not going beyond the ideal cliché or “prototype”.

This may sound chauvinistic and be a source of regret for wives, moralists, and feminists, but it is nonetheless an unshakable fact regarding the process of sexual arousal in the average male (not only of “our society”, but of any society in the history of mankind). Also, unfortunately, but again inevitably, the preference of most men for young partners, which also seems to be biologically programmed due to the greater fertility of young women; the opposite is much less justified, for men remain fertile longer than women, and their most important dignity (the ability to provide and protect) often increases with age.

REACTION TO EROTIC

Consistent with what has been said above, men's reactions to pornography differ from women in predictable ways.

1. Men are more interested than women in seeking out and looking at unambiguous images of sex. Women generally turn down opportunities to view pornography unless they feel extremely safe (especially in the company of the man they love).

2. Men, more than women, are drawn to the depiction of anonymous, mechanical, anatomical, lustful, and group sex, especially scenes where women are young and abused, humiliated, or otherwise used as a purely sexual object. For women, scenes focused on romance, love experiences and personal relationships are more interesting.

3. Visual pornography is clearly more interesting to men; women tend to be more attracted to audio or written information (especially detailed descriptions of the participants and their relationships). This probably reflects the usually greater visuo-spatial orientation of men compared to the predominantly verbal-semantic perception of women.

Laboratory studies have found little difference between men and women in both self-reported arousal and physiological responses to different types of erotic stimuli (for a review, see Rosen and Beck, 1988). There is no doubt that women can be aroused by images of explicit sexual activity if coaxed into viewing such material, and romantic love stories are not a prerequisite for arousal. The main difference between the sexes is the degree of interest in pornography, willingness to watch it and attitudes towards it. (Actually, volunteer lab data is difficult to interpret; female volunteers typically seek out this opportunity themselves and are therefore less representative of the female population in general than male males in general.) However, it is clear that most women would prefer reading romance to watching pornography, and they express disgust towards certain types of pornography (for example, depictions of forced sex leading to orgasm), even if they tend to arouse them when viewed.

Again, feminists and social learning theorists are disposed to attribute these gender differences to education and the media. They assume that these differences will disappear with greater social equality between men and women or through targeted campaigns. However, it is precisely these differences that flow directly from the foundations of ethology and are therefore deeply rooted in our biology... Thus, the changes brought about by social influences and ideas, however desirable they may be to modern human society, turn out to be fragile and at times superficial.

It should be noted that within statistical samples, men have significant individual differences in the degree of arousal from erotic images. While most men are aroused to some degree (adjusted for self-report, penile plethysmography, and increased frequency of masturbation after viewing), the effect is less pronounced in conservative or intolerant people (adjusted for church affiliation, political beliefs, and attitudes towards premarital sex) . This is usually interpreted to mean that negative attitudes towards hedonistic sex include cognitive factors that provoke interference or suppress the process of sexual arousal. However, Eysenck's (1976) work on the genetic relationship between tolerance and libido suggests a different interpretation. Tolerance and libido are so correlated that they cannot be separated; they clearly reflect the same genetic and hormonal factors, as if permissive relationships evolved as a rationalization of behaviors dictated by a strong libido. In other words, while the individual differences linking tolerance and excitability are indisputable, their origin may be more biochemical than acquired in a family, religious, or other context.

In studying the relationship between male sex hormones and libido, Wilson (1984) found that among opera singers, basses and baritones had higher libidos and more backstage affairs than tenors. This is most likely due to the fact that the hormonal factors that determine the depth of the voice (both prenatally and during puberty) are also responsible for the level of libido/tolerance. However, any discussion of the differences between typical men and women must be aware of the significant individual differences within the same sex that can exist due to biological factors.

Incidentally, it is worth noting that the oft-used diagnostic cliché “suppressed sex drive” (PSV), which appears even in the DSM-III, carries the unwarranted theoretical assumption that some hypothetical inhibitory power is blocking the expression of a “normal” libido. Another possibility to be considered is that the libido is naturally (that is, physiological rather than pathological) low or absent altogether. To date, there is no satisfactory evidence that the majority of men (or women) diagnosed with PSV are victims of excessive "inhibitory forces" - psychodynamic, conditioned reflex, or any other. They may simply belong to the category of people with a libido located at the minimum end of the bell curve. These two different types of sexual indifference are shown in. It would be possible to define homosexuals by a parallel diagnostic assumption as inhibited (or perverted) heterosexuals; such a definition, common in the past, is clearly offensive to homosexuals, and most researchers now dispute its validity.

EDUCATIONAL AND COGNITIVE (COGNITIVE) FACTORS

Although the importance of instinctive and early imprinting processes in male sexual arousal has been emphasized above, there is no doubt that later educational and cognitive factors, such as the beliefs and role expectations of men and women, have a significant influence.

For example, previously experienced sexual behaviors often form the basis of current sexual fantasies. Sue (1979) found that 43% of college students and 41% of female college students fantasized about their previous partner during intercourse with a new partner. Also Griffitt (1975) presented data that the experience of a previous sexual intercourse is associated with increased arousal during the mental reproduction of this act. Of course, in the latter case, the location of cause and effect is in question, but it is nonetheless reasonable to assume that sexual experience may modify our future responsiveness to evocative situations and partners.

Clinicians often suggest that traumatic or unsatisfactory relationships with parents or caregivers during childhood, and unsuccessful contact with partners during the formative years (especially during puberty) may be responsible for inadequate functioning and even distortion of sexual goals in later life.

Thus, psychoanalysts attribute homosexuality to a "castration complex" that can arise in early childhood with an overdominant mother and then grow through "castrating" intercourse with menacing women in adulthood. And, although the scientific evidence supporting this view is evasive, there is laboratory evidence that suggests that "self-hypnosis formulas" (suggested by the experimenter) can change sexual reactivity to erotic stimuli. And if the aspects on which the experimenter focuses our attention can change our sexual arousal, then it is likely that the things we say to ourselves (based on past experience) will have at least the same effect.

An interesting experiment demonstrating the manifold effects of ego deflation is by La Torre (1980). The students were asked to choose from a set of photographs those girls they would like to date. After that, feedback was repeatedly established with them: the date proposal was either rejected (failure), or potential partners showed interest in meeting (success). This implied that the girls' decisions were based on a reciprocal acquaintance with photographs and biographies of students. Subsequent testing using a wide range of visual stimuli - from images of women in general to impersonal approximations such as body parts, shoes and underwear - revealed the initial manifestations of tendencies to fetishism in the "losers" who considered themselves unattractive from a female point of view. Rejected men responded more to "partial" photographs than to images of women as a whole.

These facts are consistent with Gosselin and Wilson's (1980) data showing that most types of deviant men are shy and introverted, just as the clinical picture of most fetishists indicates their lack of sexual experience and the presence of socially detrimental conditions such as psoriasis, dermatitis or epilepsy.

It has previously been noted that training can influence reactivity to erotic stimuli. This applies not only to the classical (Pavlovian) conditioned reflexes described above, but also to incentive conditioning, which is concerned not with the comparison of stimuli, but with the relationship between some kind of behavior and its consequences (that is, reward or punishment). This is particularly persuasive when studying biofeedback variants of sexual arousal using penile plethysmography or similar techniques (see Dekker and Everaerd, 1989 for a review of such studies). There are several works demonstrating the ability to stimulate or suppress an erection by volitional effort, probably through the creation of internal images - thus, biofeedback (allowing you to control sexual arousal) can help in gaining volitional control.

Of all the conditioned reflex paradigms, Kantorowitz's (1978) study is probably the most interesting. Eight men masturbated to the onset of orgasm, and at different times in a series of 8 masturbatory acts in the stage of plateau, resolution or refractoriness of the copulative cycle according to Masters and Johnson (1966) () they were shown various erotic slides. Presented in the pre-orgasmic (plateau) stages, transparencies caused an increase in excitability (that is, with each subsequent demonstration, the slides acted more and more exciting), while after orgasm (in the refractory stage) a drop in erotic stimulating power was revealed.

Simply put, this helps to explain the greater excitability of men towards women with whom they have not yet entered into intimate relationships. It can also be assumed that a man who turns away from his partner immediately after coitus is very likely even doing her (and at the same time himself) a good deed, avoiding a conditioned reflex loss of interest in her physical stimuli. Of course, this same effect may also apply to women with respect to male attractiveness, but cross-sex studies do not seem to have been done.

In passing, we note that Kantorowitz also observed personality differences in the ease of forming positive and inhibitory conditioned reflexes. In extraverts, the development of conditioned reflexes in the preorgasmic stage (positive) prevailed, while introverts were more prone to the development of extinction inhibition after orgasm. This is consistent with the fact that introverts in general are much more likely to experience sexual difficulties of an inhibitory nature (eg, impotence and decreased libido - see Wilson, 1981).

ADDICTIVE AND NOVELTY

One of the striking effects observed in the laboratory study of erotic arousal is the tendency for a progressive decrease in the level of arousal with repeated presentations of the same stimulus. This is denoted by the term addictive, and it is understood that the main requirement of sexual arousal is novelty. In this sense, sexual arousal in response to erotic stimuli is a phenomenon incomparable with the knee jerk: the image, which at first acts as the strongest stimulus, soon loses this ability.

The noted need for novelty extends to sexual partners. Laboratory animals get tired of the same partner, but the frequency of copulation quickly recovers when a fresh partner appears. This is called the “Coolidge effect” according to the well-known story of a visit to a state farm by the President and Mrs. Coolidge, who was impressed by the ability of a rooster, about which she was told that his intercourse “dozens of times a day” was carried out with a new hen each time. . Livestock such as bulls and rams have a marked preference for new females (), and "Don Juan Syndrome" is widespread among males.

Although women also find the idea of ​​new partners exciting (see, for example, Fisher and Byrne, 1978), men tend to place more emphasis on the novelty of a partner. This is also quite predictable, based on the theory of evolution. Males, due to the ability to fertilize several females in parallel at once, can win genetically. Females, on the other hand, are more interested in retaining the help of the male they have chosen for fertilization. Again, although the difference between men and women is not absolute, men are about twice as likely as women to express a desire for more partners to optimize their sex life.

Table 2.2. The difference in the ideas of men and women about the ideal sex life [From Wilson, 1989.]

Perhaps it is habituation that explains incest avoidance in higher mammals, since studies of the behavior of captive primates, as well as those of humans on Israeli kibbutzim, suggest that individuals avoid sexual contact with those raised in close proximity to them, regardless of genetic relationship. In other words, incest avoidance is not due to genetic recognition or fear of punishment (although the latter may occur), but primarily because "early familiarity breeds neglect." Close relatives who grew up far from each other often experience strong sexual attraction, while those who have lived most of the time together are sexually indifferent. In the light of these facts, the sexual indifference that often occurs among married couples can be seen as a special case of incest avoidance. In other words, both cases can be explained by a decrease in the novelty of sexual stimuli due to prolonged exposure.

Marriage counselors who see many couples whose sexual life has practically ceased often try to interpret this phenomenon in terms of psychological conflicts, where interpersonal bitterness actively suppresses sexual relationships. Probably, such an interpretation contains part of the truth and in fact may be the only effective direction of therapy, however, the true problem often lies simply in the extinction of sexual desire due to long-term intimacy. Similarly, sex therapists observe in many men, whether they realize it or not, "selective impotence" in relation to wives or regular partners. Although deliberate testing of this hypothesis by encouraging flings is unethical and unacceptable, circumstances may demonstrate the absolute safety of sexual activity with new young partners. Again, it may be more convenient for the clinician to proceed assuming that the disorder is due to "unconscious hostility" in the relationship, or relying on a similar concept of positive inhibition, while simple habituation plays a much more significant role.

The significance of novelty in sexual arousal, while well established scientifically and generally accepted fairly favorably by non-professionals (not always by clinicians), continues to retain elements of a theoretical problem. Impact of novelty on orienting reflex in the terminology of psychologists (as a set of physiological indicators of readiness for action and causative agents of anxiety, reflecting the animal’s attempt to assess the threat to its survival from new stimuli) is quite explicable by the concept of a “matcher” in the hippocampus, gradually classifying each stimulus recognized as familiar to the category of non-threatening. It is much more difficult, however, to imagine the processes in the central nervous system that are necessary to mediate sexual addiction (although they must exist).

The problem is that, on the one hand, we have a positive plan or “prototype” of excitation, established by innate triggering mechanisms and mechanisms that have developed in early childhood according to the type of imprinting, and on the other hand, a program that ensures the gradual loss of any representative of this prototype of the ability to cause excitation. For example, the masochist cannot be satisfied with one particular image of a woman in boots and a whip—he needs a constant supply of minor variations on the theme. A fetishist will not be satisfied with one pair of shoes - constantly changing details are needed within certain limits. And for most "normal" men, no single image of the nude (or a particular partner) can provide optimal lifelong stimulation - some degree of "going to the side" seems inevitable. Changing clothes, positions, places of intercourse, darkening the bedroom, etc. - all this not only contributes to the acquisition of novelty and in a certain sense replaces the "real thing", but, in evolutionary terms, implies no less than a change of partner. The biological significance of such a model is clear (the “reproductive imperative” frankly encourages the relative promiscuity of males for maximum gene dispersion), but its physiological mechanisms remain a mystery.

An interesting theoretical question arises: what happens if a particular partner and the forms of sexual activity that she enjoys turn out to be exactly consistent with the optimal plan for a man? Will it lead to true love? Will the mechanism of novelty stop working? Such an event is statistically unlikely, but close approximations to it can be quite frequent. Indeed, monogamous, just like in swans, relationships are sometimes found in human couples, and they can be quite explained in this way. This implies that a constant need for novelty arises only as a result of deviations from the standard in specific individuals, which creates instability.

However, it is more likely that novelty itself has exciting properties, in some aspects inherent in the orienting reflex or even the emergency system of the choice “fight or flight”. There is evidence that the threat can contribute to sexual arousal (hence masochism, wartime romances, and the special piquancy attached to the connection by illegality). And in fact, the novelty is psychophysiologically very close to the threat; new stimuli are considered by the brain's "behavioral suppression system" as dangerous until proven otherwise. So new partners are able to “turn” a man towards themselves in part by the fact that they cause a certain amount of fear in him.

SYMPATIC STIMULATION AND SEXUAL EXCITATION

Zillmann (1986) notes that sexual arousal, since it, along with the highest manifestations of fear and anger, introduces an element of sympathetic predominance into the nervous system, is thus closely related to the survival (or emergency) system. He argues that this opinion is justified, despite the presence of a number of parasympathetic components in the provision of sexual functions (especially in the blood supply to the genitals). Therefore, Zillmann refers to the triad "running - fighting - intercourse" as a group of comparable hypersympathetic states.

The connection between these three emotions is confirmed on several levels. Brain research reveals relationships in the limbic system where amygdala excitation (apparently controlling states of running and fighting) often spills over to septal structures (thought to be responsible for sexual behavior) and vice versa. There is also an endocrine connection: androgens secreted by the adrenal cortex potentiate, along with sexual behavior, aggressiveness, both in men and women. At the behavioral level, erotica elicits sympathetic stimulation, physiologically almost indistinguishable from manifestations of fear or anger. A more detailed discussion of the central and peripheral psychophysiological links between sexual arousal and autonomic arousal nervous system see chap. 3.

From this commonality between fear, anger, and sexual affect, Zillmann suggests that the occurrence of an initial emotion will evoke a neighboring emotion from that group by spreading arousal. Indeed, there is both experimental and anecdotal evidence of the ability of fear and anger to stimulate sexual arousal and activity. For example, male rats that were shocked in the presence of a female in heat were more likely to mate than males that were not shocked. Similarly, human experiments have shown that fear or anger pre-arousal can increase sexual reactivity (eg, Hoon, Wincze, Hoon, 1977; Wolchik et al., 1980; Barlow et al., 1983] and romantic attraction. In this regard, , however, there are gender differences.In general, women are more often aroused by fear of a partner, while men are predominantly suppressed by fear ().

Table 2.3. The effect of fear and aggression on the sexual behavior of males and females in many animal species and in humans

Such studies suggest that attempts to treat sexual dysfunctions with relaxation techniques such as psychic desensitisation or the use of tranquilizers (in both men and women) may be mistaken in their basic postulate that relaxation promotes sexual arousal. This may explain the repeated clinical failures of this approach, especially in women. This is consistent with the data on the inhibitory effect of alcohol on potency, although it liberates socially.

However, it seems that there are certain types of anxiety associated with dysfunction, at least for certain types of men. Beck et al. (1984) found that while heightened anxiety increased the sexual reactivity of sexually functional men, the opposite was true for dysfunctional men. In the group of men with sexual difficulties, anxiety appears to have an overwhelming effect on penile response. It is also possible that anxiety can reach a critical level. Very high levels, anxiety can be totally overwhelming in relation to sexual arousal.

It is probably justified to be somewhat wary of the emergence of scientific evidence suggesting the possible beneficial effects of such antisocial behaviors as adultery, sadomasochism, and even violence, presenting them as potentially facilitating sexual arousal in normal men. In this regard, the value of sexual satisfaction should be compared with other values ​​that can be called moral or civilized. Of course, extreme forms of forced sex, such as rape or such dangerous acts as semi-suffocation, should be considered reprehensible, although their motivation can be better understood in the light of the theory outlined above.

REQUIREMENTS FOR PRACTICAL IMPLEMENTATION

An often cited cause of male sexual problems by clinicians is the anxious expectation of performance evaluation, a particular form of anxiety stemming from the pernicious self-belief that it is necessary to have the ability of a stud stallion and the belief that the inability to live up to the desired level is highly humiliating. A vicious spiral ensues, where the fear of failure increases the likelihood of actual failure, which in turn reinforces the anxious anticipation of future attempts.

This is justified not only intuitively, but also by a number of laboratory studies. Farkas et al. (1979) attempted to create a differentiated erection expectancy in 32 men with normal sexual functioning by telling each of them whether the video they were about to watch would cause sexual arousal. The instruction did not affect either the tumescence of the penis or the subjects' impression of the degree of sexual arousal. Lange et al. (1981) used a more direct approach: 24 normal men, while watching erotic videos, tuned in either to sexual arousal (the state of readiness for sexual intercourse) or to internal pleasant sensations (sensual focus) while watching an erotic movie. Here, too, no effect was observed, except for a slight tendency to increase arousal in the ready mode. Heiman and Rowland (1983) repeated this experiment, supplementing it with a group of men with disturbed functions, who showed a decrease in the response of the penis.

But perhaps the most interesting study in this area was by Barlow et al. (1983), which necessitated readiness for practical actions under the threat of using electric shock in case of insufficient erection while watching erotic films. This resulted in greater tumescence in normal males than in the control group, where there was no threat of shock; However, the same effect was observed in other men (compare with the discussion about the transfer of excitation).

These data suggest that readiness requirements are not in themselves an inhibitory factor, although they may be after failure, according to Masters, Johnson, and other sex therapists. In other words, performance requirements hinder execution itself only when they are accompanied by an expectation of failure. Individual differences also play an important role, as was suggested earlier: neurotic introverts are likely to be more susceptible to inhibitory influences.

A similar conclusion regarding the selective impact of performance requirements is presented by Beck et al. (1983), who studied the effect of different levels of arousal in a film partner on the degree of sexual arousal in a man after watching an erotic film. When an arousing partner was perceived as very aroused, men prone to lesser tumescence, while the reactivity of normal males increased. Post-experimental interviews confirmed that in real life, healthy men were more "turned on" by an aroused partner, while dysfunctional men in this case experienced an increase in performance requirements. Thus, it seems that performance requirements are detrimental to the sexual behavior of only already sexually troubled men, while normally functioning men are either unaffected or motivated to higher performance.

DOMINATION AND SELF-CONFIDENCE

This discussion naturally leads to an important premise in the concept of the effectiveness of male sexuality as a sense of power, competence and self-confidence, regardless of the orientation to a partner or to everyone around in general. The natural order in most mammals seems to consist of intense competition between males, where the dominant get all the advantages in procreation, and the compliant (unsuccessful) males are content with a casual sex life. In most primates, including the human race, 20% of the dominant males account for 80% of copulations. This is largely due to women's choice (Henry Kissinger is among those who believe that “power is the most powerful aphrodisiac”), but men who triumph in the ups and downs of life, sports or fights are prepared to extract sexual benefits from their victories at the expense of brain biochemistry. associated with changes in the levels of sexual hormones.

The antipode of triumph is depression, which can result from a series of failures and manifestations of helplessness. It has been observed that rapid loss of social status (analogous to loss of position in the hierarchy of the animal kingdom) often precedes depressive illness, and loss of libido is a well-established symptom of depression. Under these conditions, the refusal to compete can protect the defeated male from complete destruction, so that in the future he can take part in another fight.

Thus, for effective sexual functioning, a man must experience a sense of social significance; you need to feel “on top” and “normal”. Conversely, in women, submissiveness tends to increase their sexual reactivity; women rarely accept the advances of men over whom they feel superior. Therefore, incorporating elements of self-confidence training into therapeutic programs with a focus on restoring feelings of worth, competence, and effectiveness, much like the behavioral treatment of depression, can be of great benefit to the treatment of male impotence.

SUMMARY

A man's sexual arousal usually has the following characteristics:

1. Ideas about ideal “goals” are developed as a result of innate attitudes and imprinting processes of early childhood. Normal or deviant, they are difficult to change and can be seen as fantasies that help to arouse sexual intercourse in adults. While visual elements predominate (especially including aspects such as pink and black, roundness and hair), pheromones and other sensory qualities also play a part.

2. Preparedness and ability to anticipate success or failure and a sense of self-esteem also from early childhood to adulthood have a depressing or stimulating effect on sexual performance. One of the most important factors is a sense of social worth, competence and self-confidence. The perception of one's own "fit" and perhaps even superiority over a partner is very important for male arousal.

3. The novelty and youth of the partner are the main factors that determine the ease with which sexual arousal occurs. Romantic love is rarely a prerequisite for male arousal, and a very long and close acquaintance usually leads to addiction (progressive fading of sexual excitability). This almost inevitably leads to tension within a long marriage.

4. Threats and anxiety do not necessarily interfere with a man's sexual arousal and may even increase arousal in normal men by radiating arousal. This may explain the special attraction of forbidden sex and the popularity of sadomasochistic ideas and behaviors such as pain, enslavement and humiliation. However, the anxious expectation of evaluation, combined with the anticipation of possible failure, forms a special kind of neurosis that overwhelmingly affects men with a history of erectile dysfunction, and there are significant individual differences in its effect on arousal.


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