The whole truth about men: He just doesn't like you. And you don't have to make excuses for him.

20 years ago, American writers Ellen Fein and Sherry Schneider collected advice on how a woman can get the man of her dreams in her best-selling book. Since then, the feminist movement has revived and strengthened, and such literature has received the label "sexist". However, the "New Rules" are still being reprinted and find many fans and followers. What is the secret?

Over the years, gurus Ellen Fein and Sherry Schneider have analyzed the behavior of women who are happy in their personal lives - those who have many suitors, who are successfully married and have a happy marriage. Oprah Winfrey called their bestseller Rules for Winning the Heart of the Man of Your Dreams a phenomenon and twice invited the authors to her talk show. People magazine classified the book as a must-read, and glossy magazines named it the best publication on relationships. The authors assure: over the 20 years of the existence of the “Rules”, millions of women have been able to feel their absolute effectiveness. They got a relationship full of love and respect, which spilled over into a happy and strong marriage. In The New Rules, female writers help modern women and girls communicate through Facebook, Skype, SMS, etc. and at the same time remain mysterious, maintain a hunter's instinct in a man when there are so many “easy prey” around him, get married in an era when everyone lives in civil marriages and is in no hurry to take responsibility.

"Men love difficulties and lose interest when the object of this interest - and especially a woman - gets them too easily."

“Secret way to get a guy: be a challenge for him. Treat him like you don't care about him,” urge Ellen Fein and Sherry Schneider. In their opinion, it is necessary to create an atmosphere of mystery and make a man crave meeting you, which is a rarity these days. “Rules” is a way of communicating with any man (provided that he first started a conversation with you, in person or on the Internet), thanks to which he becomes obsessed with you and is ready for a serious relationship.

How to Marry the Man of Your Dreams According to Ellen Fein and Sherry Schneider

Be a girl different from the rest and look like a girl different from the rest.

Do not approach a man first and do not start a conversation, do not call or write to a man first.

Do not invite men on a date via SMS, social networks, or in any other way.

Wait at least 4 hours before replying to the man's first message, and at least half an hour before replying to each subsequent message.

"Let's talk/write later": always finish everything first - and disappear from sight!

Do not reply to SMS or any other messages after midnight.

Do not accept an invitation to a Saturday date later than Wednesday. "Right girls" lead a busy life. Of course, you've already made plans for the weekend before it's Thursday! If he invites you too late, don't reprimand him. Just say you're sorry, but you're busy.

Make yourself "invisible" for instant messaging. Even if nothing is happening in your life, you should not notify the guy about it by instantly responding to his messages. As with any other form of communication, he should wait for an opportunity to talk to you. To be interesting to you, he will have to work hard. Do not deprive a man of this opportunity by immediately answering messages and sitting online for hours! Remember, you have your own life (study, work, friends, hobbies, workouts, and hopefully dates) and you only have 10 minutes to chat and no more. If a guy has a lot to say and a lot to ask you, he can do it during a date!

Don't spend 24 hours a day, seven days a week with him.

Long-distance relationships: let him offer to Skype more often and visit you.

Don't text men first, ignore emoticons and winks on online dating sites.

Do not pay for dinner and do not buy his love in any way.

Don't do self-destructive acts when dating married men. If he wants to see you, tell him to call you when he is single. And after that, no communication, forget it, say "next!" - and focus on finding men who are truly free.

Don't date a man who cancels your appointments more than once.

Do not send a man anything that would be unpleasant to leave him in the event of your separation.

Don't settle for one-night stands and pointless relationships.

Do not rush to sleep with a man. The “right girl” makes a guy wait to help him fall in love with her, with her soul, with her essence – and not just with her body. The longer you delay intimacy, the longer he will be able to care for you, plan romantic meetings and dream about you. Men love challenges and don't appreciate anything that comes too easy for them, especially sex!

Don't date a man without commitment! If your relationship lasts more than a year and at the same time they are “correct” (you allowed the man to “chase you”, met him no more than 2-3 times a week, refused to spend vacations with him, did not move to live with him), then most helped him fall in love with you and want to marry. A man wants to see you more and more. But if, after a year of relationship, the man did not offer to marry him, you should tell him that you are an old-fashioned girl and are not going to meet anyone forever. If he starts making excuses, offer to take a break from the relationship. Ask him to think it over alone and call when he's ready to commit.

A man might say, “I have a terrible blockage at work; I recently went through the breakup of a serious relationship, which was a big blow for me; the divorce of my parents left an indelible mark on my soul and brought a lot of new troubles; now I need to focus on my career; I can't get into a relationship until things get better in my life; as soon as my situation improves, I will leave my wife, girlfriend, lousy job; I'm terribly busy."

It's easier for us to jump out of a window than to say, "You're not good for me." We are one hundred percent sure that in this case you will kill us or yourself, or both of us, or, even worse, start crying and screaming. Even if we do not talk about it, we clearly show you our attitude. Stop making excuses for us, our actions speak for themselves: you just don't like us.

1. He doesn't like you that much if he doesn't ask you out on a date.

Because if he likes you, trust me, he will definitely make an appointment with you.

1. Variant of excuse: He may not want to destroy our friendship

I hate to tell you about it, but this excuse does not stand up to scrutiny. Unfortunately, throughout the history of mankind, this excuse has never been used by those who really meant it. If we really care about a woman, we can't bring ourselves to stop - we want more. And please don't tell me he's just 'afraid'. The only thing he is afraid of - and I say this, feeling sincere sympathy for you - is to admit that you do not attract him at all.

2. Variant of excuse: He probably does not dare to take the first step

You can hint to a man that you have sympathy for him, but you should not help him ask you out on a date. I repeat again, dear ladies: the fact that you smile and playfully wink at him will be quite enough.

3. Variation of excuse: Maybe he doesn't want to rush things.

If a man really likes you, but there are deeply personal reasons why he does not want to rush things, he will immediately tell you about it. He will not leave you in the dark, as he needs confidence that you will not be disappointed and will not disappear from his life.

4. Excuse like "But he gave me his phone number"

Don't let him use cheap tricks to get you to ask him out on a date. If you are interested in a man, he will take care of everything. It sounds a bit old-fashioned, but when a man likes a woman, he asks her out.

5. Excuse like "Maybe he forgot about me"

Be sure you impress him. Now leave everything as it is. If he likes you, he will remember you even after the tsunami, the flood or the defeat of the Russian team in the next match. If he forgot about you, do not waste time on him. Do you know why? Because you are great.

• Any excuse essentially means that you are of little interest to him. Men are not afraid to “destroy friendships.”
• Don't fall for his tricks and don't ask him out on a date. If he likes you, he will invite you.
• If you can find him, then he can find you. If he wants to find you, he will.
• "Hey, let's meet at such-and-such a party / at some bar / at a friend's house" is not a date invitation. Even if you live in New York.
• A man remembers well whether he liked you when he met, so hang up.
• You are good enough to be asked out on a date.

2. He doesn't like you that much if he doesn't call you.

Men know how to use the phone

6. Excuse like "But he's on the road so often"

Take note: the man who is interested in you wants to spend time with you. And he will only be satisfied with five phone calls if he does not have time for a plane to rush to you.

7. Excuse like “But he has other things on his mind.”

The most important question here is: “Is it okay if a man forgot to call me?” I answer: "No." Unless he needs to rush someone to the hospital, or if someone stole his Ferrari. He should never forget that he promised to call you. If I really like you, I will never forget about you. Don't you expect the kind of guy who would rather forget about everything that happened in his life than forget about you?

8. Excuse like "He doesn't say what he really thinks"

Here's the problem: At the end of a date or phone call, many men tell you what they think you'd like to hear. They think it's better than nothing. So if the guy you're dating doesn't call you despite all his promises, is it worth getting hung up on? After all, you need a man who can at least keep his word.

9. Excuse like "But he's very busy."

And now I'm going to make an outrageous, harsh and peremptory statement regarding the relationship between a man and a woman: the word "busy" is complete nonsense, donkeys usually use it. The word "busy" in one gulp can destroy any relationship. Extremely “busy” may seem like a compelling excuse, but in reality, behind this concept there is always a man who was not interested in calling you. Remember: men always have time to get what they want.

10. One hundred percent of the respondents of the stronger sex said: they will always find a minute to call the woman they really like.

• If he doesn't call you, then he doesn't care about you.
• If he makes promises and then fails you over small things, rest assured that the same thing will happen when it comes to more serious things. Keep this in mind and keep in mind that this guy will not have a hard time disappointing you.
• You should not build a relationship with someone who is not able to keep his word.
• If he is unwilling to make the slightest effort to calm you down and smooth out the brewing conflicts in your relationship, then he simply does not respect your feelings and needs.
• "Busy" is the same as "donkey". And "ass" is the same as the guy you're dating.
• You deserve a fucking call.

3. He doesn't like you that much if he doesn't acknowledge the fact that you're dating.

Spending time together doesn't mean dating

11. Excuse like "He just went through a painful breakup."

He may be one of your closest friends, but as a man, he's not that infatuated with you. Beware of the word "friend". It is often used by men or women who are in love with these men to justify their most piggy behaviour. When choosing friends, I prefer people who don't upset me.

12. Excuse like "But we're really dating"

Men, just like women, seek to find a sense of security and security when they see a relationship become serious. One common way to achieve this is to lay claim to a loved one. A man who is truly infatuated with you will want you to belong to him completely. What's wrong with that, girls?

13. "It's better than nothing" excuse

Let me remind you: you need a man who wants you, calls you regularly, and makes you feel like the sexiest and most desirable woman in the world. He longs to see you more and more often, because each time his feeling grows stronger, growing from sympathy into true love. A relationship in which you meet a man once every two weeks or once a month, without feeling any love or sympathy from him, can last a day, or a week, or a month. But can they last a lifetime?

14. One hundred percent of the men surveyed said that the fear of a serious relationship has never kept them from starting a new romance. One young man even remarked, "The fear of a serious relationship is one of the myths of the big city." And another guy said, "That's what we say to girls we don't really like."

• Men talk about their feelings, even if you refuse to listen or do not believe their confessions. "I'm not ready for a serious relationship" means "I'm not ready for a serious relationship with you or "I'm not sure you're the right woman for me." (I am sorry.)
• "Better than nothing" should not suit you.
• If you don't understand what's going on in your relationship, then it's okay to slow down and ask him a few questions.
• Smells like uncertainty? Don't expect good.
• There is one guy in the world who wants to tell everyone and everyone that he is your boyfriend. Stop fooling around, go find him.

4. He doesn't like you that much if he doesn't want to have sex with you.

If a man likes a woman, he always wants to touch her.

Dear ladies, you have already met and will meet a great many men. I hate to tell you this, but some of these men will just decide you're not their type. And none of those men who don't like you will ever tell you about it. And he will say that ... he is afraid, worried, languishing from fatigue, in pain from a broken leg, suffering from a cold, afraid (again). But the truth, simple, cruel and bitter, is clear as daylight: you do not attract him, and he does not want to hurt you.

15. Excuse like "He's afraid he'll get hurt again"

Is he afraid? Yes, he is afraid to offend you. That is why he did not clarify the situation with your relationship. Perhaps he is even trying to make himself feel at least something for you, talking about his love and that he does not want to lose you, but he could just as well sign your diary. He loves you as a friend. If he loved you as a woman, he would not be able to control himself and would have a whirlwind romance with you, despite all the fears and unpleasant memories.

16. Excuse like "I'm driving him so crazy he doesn't show any interest"

Of course, many people have had to suffer in the past, and now they are afraid of a serious relationship. But you know what? If a man really likes you, nothing will stop him from achieving you, even the fear of a serious relationship. If he's really in big trouble about it, he might go for pointless treatment, but he'll never keep you in the dark.

17. Excuse like "But it's so cool"

It used to be that a woman refuses to have sex when she wants to gain power over a man. It seems that the representatives of the stronger sex also learned to use it. If a guy, lying on the couch with you, joyfully eats cookies and watches a movie (and is not gay at the same time), then you simply do not attract him.

18. Excuse like "He finds a bunch of explanations for everything."

You can believe his excuses if you want, but first ask yourself a couple of questions. Are you satisfied with such relationships? The most important thing here is do you want to feel this way, perhaps for the rest of your life? Sex is also one of the greatest pleasures a person can experience. Therefore, it is at least strange when the person you are dating interferes with your enjoyment.

19. Remember:

• People talk about who they really are all the time. If a man tells you that monogamy is not for him, then there is no reason not to believe him.
• Communication is great. But if communication is combined with sex - it's even better. Call a spade a spade, or rather, call a friend a friend. And find yourself a friend who can't resist touching you.
• If you have low self-esteem, then you will have to spend more time improving it than looking for a new boyfriend. So prioritize according to your needs.
• If you are tempted by the thought of a thousand and one nights spent in the arms (and only) of some man, then get yourself a puppy.
• Hot little thing, there is a man walking around who really wants to make love to you.

5. He doesn't like you that much if he sleeps with another woman.

There is no truly compelling excuse for cheating.

Whatever problems darken your relationship, they do not give him the right to make love with another woman. Don't ask what's wrong with you. You don't have to take the blame. And if he tells you that it happened by accident, then remember: betrayal is not accidental. This is not an accident like "I stumbled, and I was sucked in by a swamp called Treason." He planned and executed it, fully aware that it could end your relationship. Remember: if he sleeps with another woman without your permission and approval, then he behaves not just like a man who is not so passionate about you, but like a man who is not interested in you at all.

20. Excuse like "He has no excuse and he knows it"

Change is bad. And the inability to explain why you cheated on a person is even worse. If one red flag isn't enough for you, how about two? Don't date men who don't know why they did something.

21. Excuse like “But I got fat”

I am completely sure that you need to lose 90 kg in the form of your worthless boyfriend, and not at all the twenty kilos that he talks about. He cheated on you and called you fat. How much humiliation can a person endure? If something in your relationship does not suit him, then he should talk about it with you, instead of seeking solace in the vagina of a strange woman. Also, think about how he will react if you get pregnant, get old, or have a few wrinkles? Or if you dye your hair a color he doesn't like? Get rid of this loser immediately, or I myself will come to your house and throw him out of there.

22. Excuse like "He needs more sex than me"

There is no excuse for him cheating on you. Dot. There are many ways to solve this rather common problem that arises from the difference in sexual appetites. As a rule, people start by talking frankly about this topic, and everyone agrees to do everything in his power to make the partner happy. And you don't have to jump into bed with someone else!

23. Excuse like "But at least he knew her"

I explain in other words: it doesn’t matter if he loves you or not. He has made it clear to you how he feels about your novel. He went along with his feelings and arranged everything so that he was alone with another woman, kissing her, taking off her clothes and doing everything else that usually happens when two adults have sex. Can you continue to love him after this?

24. One hundred percent of the men surveyed reported that they had never made love to a woman by pure chance. (But many of them wanted to know how such an accident occurs and what needs to be done to take advantage of it.)

• There is no excuse for change. Let me repeat: there is no excuse for cheating. Now say it yourself: there is no excuse for cheating.
• The only thing you are responsible for in the moral fall of another person is your own feelings.
• Change is change. It does not matter with whom he cheated on you and how many times this happened.
• Every time it becomes easier to change. It is difficult only the first time, when you feel remorse and guilt because you did not justify the trust of another person.
• Deceivers are never happy. (Because they are all bastards.)
• An unfaithful man first of all cheats on himself, since he cannot build a normal relationship with you.

6. He doesn't like you that much if he only wants to see you when he's drunk.

If he likes you, he will seek to see you when his brain is not clouded by alcohol fumes. If your clown puts on a red nose every time it comes to intimacy, then this indicates that there are serious problems in your relationship.

25. Excuse like "But I like it when he's drunk."

If, sitting in a bar, he drunk says something like: “Baby, you are so beautiful!” and at the same time hugs you a little tighter than it should be, then it’s time to learn something: you can’t believe everything that a man says when he is drunk. And listen to the former bad guy: "bad guys" are called bad guys because they have a lot of trouble, no self-esteem, besides, they absolutely do not believe in sincere love relationships, but very often they dress cool and drive cool wheelbarrows. Do you really need this one?

26. Excuse like “At least he doesn’t drink the strongest drinks.”

Don't be fooled. A guy who doesn't fall off his feet and pee in his pants from drinking shouldn't get away with quietly shutting his brain off in a different, easier way every time you're together. It's still intoxication, it's still a desire to avoid responsibility, and it's still not good for you.

27. Remember:

• His words mean nothing if he said them while drunk. "I love you" or the like, spoken under the influence of any drink stronger than grape juice, has no power in court and in real life.
• The use of alcohol and drugs is not the way to the innermost feelings of a person. Otherwise, people would not break empty beer bottles on their heads and try to touch the flames of fire to find out if they feel something or not.
• If he wants to see you, communicate with you, have sex with you only when he is tipsy, this is not love, this is sport.
• The bad guys aren't called bad guys for nothing.
• You deserve a man who doesn't need to be pumped up to spend time with you.

7. He doesn't like you that much if he doesn't want to marry you.

Love cures the manic disease of commitment

Every one of your exes who has told you that they don't want to get married, or that they don't believe in marriage, or that they have doubts about marriage, is bound to tie the sacred bonds someday. Just not with you. Because he's not saying that he doesn't want to get married at all. He says that he does not want to marry you.

28. Excuse like "It's getting really complicated now"

If you focus on the state of your finances when choosing the time for the wedding, this auspicious period will never come. If a boyfriend is using a lack of money as an excuse not to marry you, then it is your relationship that is at risk, not his bank account.

29. Excuse like "But he's all like himself."

If you have to sit and think about how to start a conversation about marriage with a person with whom you have been in a close relationship for quite some time, then this is a wake-up call. Immediately call him for a frank conversation and sort things out. Then, as soon as you are ready, go in search of a person whose only thoughts will be occupied with how you feel.

30. Dilemma like "Is this really an excuse not to get married?"

Marriage is a tradition that we inherited from previous generations, which is why marriage has so many opponents. So be it: if a man is categorically against marriage, and you are in favor with both hands, then please make sure that behind his unwillingness to marry lies only dislike for the very institution of marriage, and not any other feelings or their absence.

31. Excuse like "I'm just not ready yet"

I hate to tell you about this, but he does not want to rush for just one reason: he is still not sure that you are the one.

32. Excuse like "He's seen enough of other failed marriages"

For a worthy man, meeting a woman with whom he wants to share his life always becomes a real event. And, probably, if he realizes that this is exactly the woman, he will not immediately tell her that the mere thought of registering their relationship disgusts him.

33. One hundred percent of the men surveyed admitted that they would no doubt offer their hand and heart to a woman if they were completely sure that she was the love of their life. One representative of the stronger sex said: “What kind of idiot do you have to be in order not to marry the woman you love?”

• "Does not want to marry" and "Does not want to marry me" are two different things. Make sure that you correctly determine which category your chosen one belongs to.
• If you have opposing views on marriage, then there are sure to be other issues that will lead to disagreement. It's time to make a problem list.
• If nothing changes in your relationship, then what are you waiting for?
• Somewhere on earth there is a man who wants to marry you.

8. He doesn't like you that much if he dumped you.

"I don't want to be with you" still means exactly that.

34. "He needs me" excuse

Do not be satisfied that he is bored without you. He must be bored. You are so unique. And yet he, as he was, and remained the man who left you. Remember, there is only one reason he can miss remembering you: he thinks that he does not want to spend this day with you.

35. Excuse like “After such a decision is much easier.”

If he dates you, asks you on dates, leaves you and continues to sleep with you, which, in essence, removes any responsibility from him for your feelings for him. There is one thing that a young man will never do if he cannot imagine his life without you: he will never leave you. The only way for you to know if you love yourself is to get rid of him, and as quickly as possible.

36. Excuse like "But everyone does it"

Stop holding on to his cock, get dressed and quickly go home to your best friend. And don't look for an excuse to stay with him. And do not think that all this crazy passion will inevitably lead to the fact that you will be together again. Oh yes, sex after a breakup is not bad at all, because it's great to sleep with someone you know. It's also great to sleep with someone you have strong feelings for. This combination makes sex after parting so bright. But now you know that because of this, a real confusion arises in the head and you begin to feel terrible. Face the truth: you are a woman, and women do not know how to separate love and sex. And don't make those mistakes again. Got it? He doesn't like you that much. He's much more into a very bad idea that masquerades as a very good idea, which is sex after a breakup. Like this.

37. Excuse like "But then he wants to go back"

Unfortunately, after you break up, your boyfriend starts looking for something better. And when he fails, he is seized by loneliness and returns "home". It doesn't sound like he likes you very much. He just really doesn't like being alone.

38. Excuse like "I refuse to accept the fact that he left me"

I'm sorry he left you. By trying again and again to get him back, you make your ex-boyfriend think: “What the hell did I find in this crazy bitch?” Remember one simple piece of advice, ladies: always be on top. Never go crazy. Well, in fact, this is not even one, but two whole pieces of advice. But trust me, you will never regret listening to them. At the very least, it will save you from the unpleasant memories of how you cut into pieces his clothes or threw away all the photos with him.

39. Remember:

• You can't prevent a breakup by talking. Debating won't help here. Termination of relations is a final decision, and it is not subject to appeal.
• Sex after a breakup doesn't mean you're back together.
• Stop talking to him. Let him miss you.
• You don't need to remind him how great you are.
• He can take care of his cat himself.
• "Posh woman" will never torment his answering machine.
• Somewhere, a young man is waiting for you, who will be just happy that you did not get back together with your terribly nasty ex-boyfriend.

9. He doesn't like you that much if he just up and disappeared.

Sometimes you have to put an end

Well, everything is very clear here. He made it clear to you that you are so not his type that he didn't even bother to leave you any news about himself. The only thing you have to take away from this love story is the fact that he decided to leave you. And he did not have the courage to tell you about it, looking into your eyes. Case is closed.

40. Justification like “Maybe he died”

There is nothing worse than not getting a response from a loved one. But the trouble is that the lack of an answer is the answer for you. He may not have written a farewell letter, but his silence speaks plainly: "I don't like you." The only reason why you should write to him again is the desire to receive an explicit refusal, now in verbal form. Have you forgotten? You are too busy with your fans and you don't have time for such nonsense.

41. Excuse like "So, it turns out I can't even fight him one last time?"

At first, it may seem that you will feel better if you call him and make a scandal. You may feel like you let him get away with it. But trust me, nothing you want to tell him will come as a revelation to him. And you already have something to spend your time on.

42. "But I just want an answer" excuse

Do you deserve to know what really happened? Undoubtedly. I can tell you what happened: you dated a terrible person. The easiest way to correct this mistake is to draw certain conclusions for yourself, live on and continue to be more selective in choosing a partner. Do it all quickly without wasting a minute of your precious time.

43. One hundred percent of the males interviewed who "disappeared" from the woman's field of vision stated that they were fully aware that they had done something terrible, and no phone calls and belated conversations would change their minds.

• Perhaps he really is in the hospital, suffering from amnesia, but most likely he is just not that interested in you.
• The absence of an answer is his answer to you.
• Don't give him the opportunity to reject you again.
• Let his mother arrange scandals for him. And you are too busy for that.
• There is no mystery here: he just left your life, and he was not worthy of you.

10. He doesn't like you that much if he's married (this includes all the other, most incredible reasons why he can't be with you)

If you cannot love each other freely and openly, then that is not true love. No matter how strong and sincere your feelings for another person are, if he cannot answer them honestly and fully, that is, with mutual love, these feelings mean nothing.

44. Excuse like "But his wife is such a bitch!"

As unhappy as his marriage was, and as horrible as his wife treated him, it certainly wasn't all that bad, otherwise he would have left her a long time ago. Sincere love relationships do not deserve to be hidden. Find yourself a man who will not hide his feelings.

45. Excuse like "But he's such a nice person"

Please don't try to ignore this fact. He is married to another woman. I know you are not like everyone else, and in your case everything is different, but the fact remains: he is married. If in your entire life you are ready to stop at a red light only once, then this is exactly the case. It's just that for everyone who plays this game, the stakes are too high.

46. ​​"I just have to wait" excuse

If, at a certain stage in the development of relations, it comes to “waiting for him,” this is an alarming signal. It's not a stock you're going to invest in. He is a man whose heart must be open enough to be ready to meet you and fall madly in love with you. If someone really likes you, he will quickly solve all his problems and make a lot of efforts so as not to lose you.

47. Remember:

• He is married.
• If he doesn't belong to you wholly and completely, then he belongs to her.
• There are a lot of cool and gentle single men in the world. Try to meet one of them.
• If a man yells and curses at his ex-wife or mourns a previous girlfriend, go to the movies with someone else.
• He is married.
• No need to join the ranks of those same women.
• You are not easy to forget. Let him find you when he is ready for a new relationship.

11. He doesn’t like you that much if he acts like a selfish egoist, braggart or just like a big jerk

If he really loves you, he will do his best to make you happy.

48. Excuse like “But he really wants to get better.”

Loving people try to treat each other well and even enjoy showing tenderness and care for their loved ones. If your partner is very bad at this, then in the end you reap the same benefits as in the situation called "He doesn't like you that much."

49. Excuse like “But he was just raised that way”

It doesn't have to be that he's crazy about your CD collection. It doesn't have to be that he likes all your shoes. But any full-fledged and prudent man simply has to make an effort on himself and fall in love with your friends and your family, especially if they are all such wonderful people.

50. Excuse like “But he will change”

Short temper is not a temporary problem. People who yell at others simply don't know how to control themselves and need psychiatric help. People who yell at others feel they have a right to do so. Hey, beauty, do you really want to create such a family?

51. Excuse like “After all, what matters is what happens between us alone.”

Why be with someone who needs to humiliate you in order to feel their own superiority? Especially in front of friends! And why should you pay attention to the fact that he treats you better when you are alone? After all, he is only waiting for how to bring you to the people in order to humiliate you. Drop it! Go to college and write a diploma on the topic: "How to find a man who is not ashamed to show his friends."

52. "But he's just trying to help" excuse

Offensive is not only such behavior when a man beats a woman. It can and should also be considered offensive behavior when a man yells at a woman, publicly humiliates her, or reminds her that she is too fat, thereby making her feel unattractive. It is very difficult to believe that you deserve true love when someone is trying their best to convince you that you do not deserve anything in this life at all. But, as I see it, all the exhortations to part with him still do not work on you. So for starters, just realize that you are too good for such a relationship. You are too good for this kind of relationship.

53. Excuse like "He just hasn't found himself yet"

54. Excuse like "Maybe it's one of his little oddities!"

You will surely meet men who do not like hugging, kissing or having sex. You will spend a lot of time trying to figure out how to deal with this and whether you are the cause of this behavior. Or you simply come to the conclusion that these people do not like doing what you think is an integral part of a fulfilling life, and you go in search of such a person who shares your views.

The joke goes like this: "Hey, Björk called, she wants to take her dress back." And the insult is like this: “God, well, you are corroded!” But the most important thing is to understand what you need. You all definitely deserve better treatment!

55. One hundred percent of the men surveyed said they had never tried to humiliate or upset a woman they really liked. And this is the most important thing.

• You should not complicate an already difficult life by sharing it with a person who gives you a lot of trouble.
• You are worthy of such a man who in any situation will behave with you as it should. (Don't forget that you should treat him well too.)
• There is no reason to yell at another person unless they are in mortal danger.
• Assholes belong in the circus, not in your apartment.
• You already have one ass, why do you need a second one?
• By getting rid of useless people, you will have a lot of free time that you can spend on what gives you pleasure.
• Believe in yourself. How could it be otherwise?

13. So what do you do?

56. Here you ask: “What if there is no next novel at all?” And we will answer: “Send these terrible thoughts on a long voyage on a ship that will surely sink, because it is destined to crash on the reefs of the Isle of Sorrow. And we don't want you on this ship."

Your new requirements:

• I will not date a person who does not invite me on dates.
• I will not date a man who makes me wait hours for his call.
• I won't date someone who isn't sure they want to date me.
• I will not date a person who makes me feel sexually unattractive.
• I will not date a person who abuses alcohol or drugs, so this makes me uncomfortable.
• I will not date a person who is afraid to make future plans with me.
• Under no circumstances will I waste time on a person who has already rejected me once.
• I will not date a married man.
• I will not date a man if he is not really a kind, sincere and gentle person.

And now it's your turn. Only you know what other requirements you want to make to your future chosen one. Write them all down. And don't forget about them.

57. DICTIONARY

Friend

This should mean the following: I would never intentionally do anything that could hurt you.

Busy

This should mean the following: today was my inauguration as President of the United States.
In some cases, this means: I just don't like you that much.

Bad guy

It should mean: The guy to stay away from.
In some cases, this means: The guy you need to stay away from.

I am not ready

It should mean: I can't find my pants.
In some cases, this means: I just don't like you that much.

Call me

It should mean this: I accidentally dropped my cell phone off a cliff into the ocean.
In some cases, this means: I just don't like you that much.

I don't like your family

It should mean: I don't want to meet your mother.
In some cases, this means: I just don't like you that much.

I'm afraid of intimacy

This should mean the following: I am really very afraid of intimacy.
In some cases, this means: I just don't like you that much.

And you will be happy!

This post is based on the book by Greg Behrendt, Liz Tuchillo He Just Doesn't Like You. The whole truth about men. We recommend reading the entire book.

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We know for sure that a loved one deserves the best words in the world. But often we find ourselves in situations where it is difficult to correctly express what you feel.

website shares with you the phrases that psychologists recommend saying to your loved ones so that the relationship is strong as steel.

1. I understand

In a stressful situation it is important adapt to the mood of the interlocutor. Sad? You can mourn a little together to let him know that you are on the same wavelength. Even in the most bleak monologue, there will be a couple of points with which you want to agree. And then you can move on to fun topics.

2. I like it!

We perceive the achieved result as only half of the success. The second half is when others and, most importantly, a loved one recognized the triumph. Only after approval we get complete satisfaction from achieving the goal, feel successful and happy. And that's exactly what you need, right?

3. What do you plan to do?

When people talk about a problem, they are not looking for guidance, but for emotional support. Instead of unsolicited advice, it’s better to express your concern with a simple question: “What are you planning to do?”

4. You are so... caring / determined / courageous

Compliments are a valuable "currency" that does not cost us anything, but sets us up for success, inspires strength and gives support. It has been proven that brain accepts compliments same way, as a monetary reward for the work done.

5. Would you like to spend time with your friends today?

Each couple needs personal space. If a partner needs to be alone with himself, it is worth giving him time to restored energy.

6. Do you remember how we ...

7. What is your happiest childhood memory?

8. Sorry

Quarreling is normal. The main thing is to return peace, leaving grievances in the past, because no one wants to live in a "combat operations" zone. In a quarrel, there is no one to blame, and the faster one admits his part of the wrong, the higher the likelihood of waiting for a reciprocal apology.

9. Thank you

Psychologists note that gratitude is one of the most positive emotions. When a person feels that they are grateful to him for something, he tunes in do This is even better for the very fact of gratitude. Simply by thanking for something, we form the necessary feelings and intentions in the partner, in addition to his conscious control.

Husband is stupid what to do

Why stupid men are annoying

A man must be smarter than a woman. In stressful situations, it is he who must quickly pull himself together and make the right decision. A man's mind is his trump card, even an outwardly ugly man seems to us more attractive at the expense of his mind than a handsome man who is not burdened with intellect. With the help of the mind, a man achieves success in his career, surrounds himself with the right people and conquers women. A stupid man can automatically cause nothing but irritation. After all, if a stupid woman has to work on her appearance, then a stupid man can no longer do anything, because a beautiful appearance in a man does not attract without his mind and charisma. Why do we need a man who cannot make the right decision in a difficult situation, has no logic and cannot teach us anything?

Husband is stupid what to do

Since you have chosen a not very smart specimen for your husband, we will work with what we have. Of course, your husband will no longer become a great scientist, but you can try to improve his mental abilities a little. After all, don't give up on a good man just because you're smarter than him. Do not think that it is useless to try to teach your husband something new and increase his intelligence. Surely he has the ability and his potential has not yet been lost! What should be done first of all in order to make a husband smarter?

Books will save the world

Unfortunately, nowadays you can hardly force a man to read. If he has not been instilled with a love of books since childhood, he will most likely resist picking up a book. You need to find something really exciting for a man to read the book without stopping. Look for something light but interesting. It can be fantasy stories or detective stories - men like books of this kind. Books develop imagination and replenish vocabulary. If a man categorically refuses to read, watch the science channel with him. Pay attention to the films that you watch with your husband. Less dumb comedies, more movies to think about!

Second education

Surely your husband bought a diploma or has not yet graduated from the university. You can try to persuade him to get an education. Promise that you will help him do tests and write a diploma. Most likely, the prospect of doing some work for him does not inspire you, but you will have to help him become smarter. It remains to justify the husband, why he needs to get an education. Tell him that a higher education will be useful for his career and that only a real man can get a diploma. You can choose the specialty that he is interested in, so that he receives not only knowledge, but also the pleasure of learning. If the husband categorically refuses to go to college, you can find courses that will last several months.

Communication with smart people

Communicating with people whose level of intelligence exceeds yours, you involuntarily become smarter. Communicate with your husband more often with smart couples, introduce him to people who can discuss interesting things and argue. In the company of smart people, the husband will feel awkward at first, but over time he will join the company and most likely improve his knowledge in order to also shine in society.

What not to do

You should not show a man that you are smarter than him. Let you know geography better and, unlike him, you can easily add up three-digit numbers in your mind, you should not boast and be proud of it. A man will feel inferior next to a girl who is more developed and more capable than him. Especially if she will show her superiority with might and main. Praise the man and his mind in every possible way and provide evidence of his logic and skill. Let him believe in himself and see that you are developing with him.
Don’t let the question arise: “My husband is stupid, what should I do?” Perhaps you just do not understand his train of thought and logic. Still, it is so different for women and men that we can mistake non-standard thinking for a lack of intelligence. And one more thing: initially choose a smart man for yourself. It is better to bet on his intelligence beforehand than to try to make a genius out of him later.