“Let him invest in you!” What relationships are valuable for a man: a psychologist's view. The more a man invests in his beloved, the ...

At first glance, this question does not seem difficult. And the answer to it seems obvious: "No way." However, not all so simple. You can invest in a woman, but skillfully. I'll try to sort out the question of how you can invest in a woman, and how - by no means impossible.

First of all, I will analyze the meaning of the word "invest". We understand it most often as "to invest money." Less commonly - as "to invest resources in general." The second understanding is more correct, since money is just one of the resources.

Resources are different, but they can be combined into the so-called Trinity "Energy - Time - Information". A resource can refer to one element of the Trinity, or to several. For example, time (the resource of time) - refers to the element of the Trinity, which is called "Time". But the resource of any skill can refer to both "Time" and "Information".

Simply put, if you help a girl do her homework, then you invest your time and information that has become yours in her. A monetary resource can be attributed to Energy, since energy is spent in order to earn this money.

You can sum it up. By investing, I mean "investing resources" in a woman in general. However, investing can be right or wrong. How the right investment differs from the wrong is described below. By resources, I mean any transfer to a woman of something of her own, which can be summed up under the Trinity "Energy - Time - Information".

So, with the understanding of investing, we figured it out. Now let's take a closer look at the Trinity "Energy - Time - Information". Two elements of the Trinity, "Energy" and "Time" have the property to end sooner or later. In contrast, the "Information" element does not end at all. This property of "Information" can be illustrated with the help of an old parable.

"One day the Master said to a student:
- If you have one apple and I have one apple, and you give me yours, and I give you mine, then we will have one apple. But if you have a thought, and I have a thought, and we exchange them, then we will both have two thoughts."

This property of information should be used with the RIGHT investment. Philip Bogachev in his book "RMES" wrote that "A girl is an ideal consumer. If you give her money, she will take money. If you give her sex, she will take sex." But, if you give the same girl information, then you do not lose anything. But whether a girl will want to receive information from you is a separate issue.

So, now we can say what is the right investment in a woman and what is the wrong investment in a woman.
Proper investment in a woman is investing in a woman information, those new knowledge and skills that develop you. With this kind of investment, you have nothing to lose if you break up with this woman. The disadvantage of such an investment is that it is not easy to find a girl who would like you to invest information in her. Girls, for the most part, expect investments with the elements "Energy" and "Time" from a man. That's just investments with the components "Energy" and "Time" - and there are wrong investments.

Let me explain this trick with an example. If you help a girl learn a foreign language by learning it yourself, then this is the right investment. After all, even if this girl refuses, goes to another, the skill will still remain. But, if you help a girl do her homework just because she needs to pass them and get a credit, then this is an example of the wrong investment in a woman. Of course, this does not apply to cases when we help a girl solve her homework for money, and not for the promise of her reciprocity.

Returning to the question posed at the beginning of the note, we can answer the following. Yes, it is possible and necessary to invest in a woman, but only resources that have the "Information" element, which develop both her and you. We need to look for these women.
But, if a woman wants you to invest in her resources with the components "Energy" and "Time", avoiding "information investments", then you should run away from this one.

In addition, there is another bonus in "information investing in a woman". There is a hierarchy of investments of a man according to Oleg Novoselov. It looks like this:
- Health;
- Professional skills;
- Knowledge about life;
- Communications;
- Reputation.
So, by properly investing in a woman, you can achieve good, more reliable connections (yes, connections in the plural), and not only with her, but also with other people. These connections will be maintained at the expense of common interests. You can achieve great professional skills by learning something new together. You can achieve a reputation as an erudite person (but this is not always the case).

What if the investment is wrong? The connection (namely, the connection in the singular) will be unstable, since sooner or later a woman will start looking for a "better man", and it is simply naive to count on the appearance of connections with other people in this situation. It will be necessary to maintain the stability of this connection at the expense of material resources, the earning of which will have to spend all the time and effort. There will no longer be time to hone skills and learn something new. And in the event of a break with such a woman, the reputation of a “goat” is secured, communication is lost, and time is lost that could be used to develop professional skills ...

Thus, with the right investment, you can win in two points of the Investment Hierarchy (if you're lucky, then in three), and with the wrong investment, you can lose in three points.

(click on image to enlarge)

In love adventures, there is anything but love. (F. La Rochefoucauld)
It is known that a man will not leave a woman if she does not fall into his arms. A weak, insecure person may refuse, deciding that this nut is too tough for him. Lazy or accustomed to easy victories and accessible women will also quickly back down. But most men will try to get their way.

An employee cautiously enters the president of the firm.
“I… er… would like… I mean… to say that I have been taking care of your daughter for 10 years now.
– And what do you want? Retirement?
Joke

The harder a woman gets, the more she is valued. Please remember this, dear readers.
The more a man invests in a woman of strength, time, money, the more he appreciates her and the more he is attached to her.
Men value much more what they give than what they receive. That is why they have a consumerist attitude towards a woman who is ready for anything, and highly appreciate the one that cost a lot of effort. For such a woman, a man can experience true passion, suffer, be jealous, the romance proceeds with violent outbursts of emotions and true affection.
The one who tries to fight against them knows best his weaknesses. (D.E.)
Even an inveterate sexual consumer is capable of stronger feelings in relation to a woman who got him with great difficulty than in relation to his victim.
For a while, even a Don Juan can lose his head and become a devoted lover (or even a husband), if the partner is worthy of it.
A heartthrob who falls in love is like a doctor who becomes infected. professional risk. (Karl Kraus)
What does all this mean? Sad as it may seem, but it is the timid, insecure woman herself, a typical victim, who involuntarily provokes negative qualities in a man. Next to such a woman, even a quite decent man, capable of love and devotion, can become a typical consumer.
Paid love is cheaper than unselfish love. (D.E.)
My patients often ask me after an unsuccessful romance: “Well, why do all men do with me what they want, but I can’t resist them ?!”
It happens that such novels with different men are repeated quite often, and each time everything proceeds according to the same scenario.
“I can’t understand a woman until I feel it!” (D.E.)
It's about the woman herself. It was she who failed to behave with dignity, demonstrated her readiness to reduce all relationships to sex, gave a man the right to treat her consumerly. She patiently endured everything that no self-respecting woman would tolerate: long disappearances and equally unexpected appearances, clearly far-fetched excuses, dismissive attitude towards herself, lies, ignoring her interests and her personality as a whole.
I kissed my first woman and smoked my first cigarette on the same day. Since then, I have never had time for cigarettes. (Arturo Toscanini)
What is most surprising, Don Juan can become very attached to a woman who knows how to behave with dignity. She does not want to be just a bed toy, reducing all relationships solely to sex, she requires true tenderness, romance, inspiration, frank conversations and trust.
A man's reputation is not determined by his manhood, but by women's ideas about his manhood. (Karol Teplitz)
In such a woman, Don Juan immediately feels a strong partner, demanding equal rights. She will not regularly rush to him in the middle of the night on a call, will not run at the first call at an inopportune hour to give him a sexual discharge and immediately part, will not sit for weeks and months at the phone, waiting for him to deign to remember her, not will accept it after an unexpected disappearance, and even more so repeatedly. A couple of times he will throw out such tricks - and she will give him a turn from the gate. She appreciates and respects herself quite highly and will not allow herself to be treated like bedding.

It all starts, as a rule, with courtship. And they require significant cash spending - restaurants, cinemas, theaters and other entertainment options. A man pays for all these meetings - such a rule was originally laid down in etiquette. This should show the lady how her partner treats her. The more she is dear to him, the more he is ready to do for her. It is believed that if a man is interested in continuing a relationship with a woman for a long time, he will invest money in her quite often and in large quantities. Even in cases where he is not rich, he will still do exactly the same.

When you officially become a couple, the nature of spending changes somewhat. There is a transformation from quantity to . There are fewer purchases and gifts than during the courtship period, but they clearly win in quality. For example, instead of a bouquet of flowers and an evening in a chic restaurant, your chosen one can buy you an expensive fur coat that you have been dreaming about for several years, or a tour to exotic islands just for the two of you.

The reason for such generosity is quite banal and from the point of view of a woman is not very pleasant. Psychologists assure: a man invests money in his wife as in his own property. He will also take care of the arrangement of the house, car, cottage. However, despite the seeming humiliation of the comparison, there is an undeniable plus in this state of affairs. Indeed, with his good, on which so much strength, energy and, of course, money are put, a man does not easily part. And this means that if the flow of financial injections into you does not decrease and does not end, he does not plan to part with you.

It often happens that a woman simply cannot survive without the help of her husband. For example, when she sits at home with a child and cannot go to work. In this case, a completely different mechanism for acquiring the financial value of a lady in the eyes of her husband works. Providing for his wife financially, a man feels more wealthy than ever. He has a sense of pride in himself, which grows every day. If a man is adequate, he will correctly assess his strength and will not demand reciprocal financial injections from his wife. Instead, he will try his best to adequately provide for his family. Thus, a man further increases his self-esteem and treats his wife more carefully, which makes him feel like a real head of the family and a breadwinner. True, in this case, in order to remain valuable for her husband, a woman also needs to try - to provide him with comfort in the house, praise him and admire him.

It happens that women are not satisfied with the statement that the more men invest in them, the more they value them. But there are those wise ladies who understand this opinion. It is they who know how to appreciate what their men do for them. And it is in them that their husbands want to invest more and more.

If you want to improve relations with your man, if you feel that he does not value you enough, has become completely indifferent, or even left, then you need to urgently familiarize yourself with some rules. And to understand that the psychology of men in relations with a woman is very different from that of women. And when a man moves away from you, you should not even try to explain and prove to him how wonderful you are.

Moreover, do not try to give him as much love and warmth as possible and surround him with your care. You should only do this when a man does the same for you! The more you try to curry favor with him, the lower your value falls in his eyes.

How to improve relationships

To improve relationships and in the future to make them only stronger and brighter, you need to at least study male psychology a little.

1. A man should run after you, not you after him.

A man should always be in the position that he does all the work in a relationship with you - both at the initial stage and when you have an established relationship. He must definitely feel that he is running after you, he is trying, he is actively gaining your attention. And then the man is completely rooted in this position in communication with you. Why is this needed?

Remember: A man does not need the one who runs after him, he needs the one he runs after.

So just let him run after you! And if he does something for you, tries for you, invests in you both morally and financially, then only then you give him all your love, warmth and care. But if he does nothing for you, and you constantly dance in front of him, trying to please him and “fit in”, then you urgently need to get out of the “running after a man” position.

2. Play by your rules, not his.

Once you start playing by his rules, you will lose. As soon as you start to adapt to him: to match externally, try to keep topics of conversation interesting to him, try to find something in common between you, etc. - your significance for a man is falling!

Yes, in many women's magazines you can read advice on how to find out a man's hobby, study all the information in order to become an interesting conversationalist for him. Or go with him where he loves and admire, although you don’t like it at all. In fact this is not true. By interesting conversations about his hobbies, you can only keep your communication on a “comradely” level and ultimately become “his boyfriend” for him. Don't force yourself to do what you don't like or study what doesn't interest you. Do it only if you really like it. After all, men very clearly feel when a woman is trying to please and can begin to "exploit" her to the fullest. Let him better try to please you and look for topics for conversation.

I know a woman who has been a "night owl" all her life, but for the sake of her man, she "retrained herself as a lark." Just to cook and serve him breakfast! She went to bed with him at ten in the evening, could not fall asleep for a long time, and in the morning she had to get up at 5.30. She was exhausted all over, every morning was a continuous torment for her. And during the day she felt overwhelmed and tired. In general, it is very important for women to get enough sleep, otherwise it loses energy and, of course, visual attractiveness.

Do you think that this man appreciated it and carried her in his arms? Absolutely not. In the end, he even started yelling at her that she was washing herself in the bathroom for a long time in the morning and stated that she must first prepare breakfast, and only then go to the toilet and wash, otherwise he would be late for work. That is, she had to immediately, getting out of bed, run to the kitchen and cook. This is a real life event! You see, his ex-wife always did this, he constantly compared her with her and, it is clear that my friend often lost in this comparison.

In the end, she packed her things and moved out from him. And, the saddest thing, he did not go after her, he soon forgot her and brought another woman to his house, suffering from preparing breakfast, lunch and dinner for him and serving slippers. In a word, he initially needed, in fact, a housekeeper, and there is no talk of any love here. So why did you have to make fun of yourself like that?

Many women turn into a real mother for their men, taking care of them, controlling them, allowing them to be capricious and “blow their lips”. And then they wonder why they have long ceased to feel like a woman, and the man has become rude and indifferent. This topic is well covered in the article.

Some men specifically test women, determining to what level she can "bend". There are those who do it unconsciously. This is some kind of verification of your .

Another friend of mine met, and then began to live together with a man who was a vegetarian. He began to insist, literally impose his nutrition system on her, they often quarreled, and in the end she left him, since vegetarianism at this stage of her life was not part of her plans. Although she had feelings for this man. He went after her, he persuaded her, he sought, he agreed that everyone would eat what they wanted and returned her. Because he loved her too and wanted to be with her. Now they live together, she never became a vegetarian, but she began to love vegetable dishes and various cereals more. But he still eats meat and sausage

If you try to pass his tests - your significance drops! Even if you fit...your value drops. You are already in need. And that's all .... you are like a candy wrapper for him. Simple and unnecessary. If you want to be needed for a man - put him in your framework! He must play by your rules. Put him in a position where he should meet your standards. It should pass your tests.

You are value - he is chasing value. And then he will develop your stable relationship. Where you get what you want. And he gets your attention and recognition. And for this you need to position yourself as a "prize woman", "a gift woman", "a reward woman". And in order to position yourself this way, you need to work on yourself and raise your self-esteem.

3. Let him fight for you

The more a man fights for you, the more necessary you become for him. And let him do it mentally, just in words, and, of course, with active actions. Your value to him is getting higher and higher.

But remember! As soon as you get into the position of fighting for him, your value in his eyes will collapse instantly. Of course, he will be pleased with it ... But it will not be pleasant for you later, when you realize that you are losing him.

There are women who initiate relationships. They get acquainted with a man, then they begin to entertain him in every possible way, then it comes to bed. And then, in most cases, a man either cools down sharply or completely disappears. Because he did not fight for this woman, he did not put his strength and emotions into her. And the fact that he did not immediately refuse, so who refuses a freebie. From the fact that it floats into your hands and you don’t need to try very hard for this.

Therefore, at first it may seem that there is nothing wrong with the fact that a woman takes the initiative and fights for a man. After all, he encourages this and is often even glad of such a manifestation of interest in himself. But in the future, such relationships begin. Even if the man does not disappear, then the woman will constantly have to pull him on herself and fight for him. In a word, she fought for him and therefore he began to position himself as a “prize man”. And then it will continue to stand in the same position. Which for women is quite disadvantageous, unpleasant and sometimes even humiliating.

4. The more a man invests, the stronger the relationship will be.

And it's not just about money, it's about everything. The more a man invests in you his time, his actions, money, gifts, the higher your significance for him. The stronger your relationship will be.

Of course, this is not about the situation when a woman lives with a man for money. I mean normal healthy relationships. Therefore, if you want you to have a stable serious relationship, a man should invest in you. But in no case should you be in the position of a beggar! In the position of a woman turned on this. Otherwise, the effect will be the opposite. Everything needs to be done right.

In a relationship, a game is very important, thanks to which they will develop rapidly (read). In a word, the more a man invests in you, the more he receives your attention, recognition of him as a worthy and magnificent man, your sexual availability. Or the more hope he gets for a close relationship with you.

If a man is trying for you, then do not skimp on compliments and kind words. But, again, do not overdo it, otherwise he will fall in love with himself and imagine himself a “prize man”. Keep a balance and don't try harder for him than he does for you.

If a man gets EVERYTHING without doing anything for this, it makes no sense to do something in communication with you. What for? After all, he already got everything he needed.

And, of course, in no case should you discuss this with him! You don't need to talk about it out loud. He should just feel it in the course of communication with you. Men feel everything. They see everything. And they quickly pick up the rules of the game.

Takova psychology of men in relationships with women. And if you want to improve relations with your beloved man, then you need to remember these rules. These simple principles for the development of relations have been tested by mankind for centuries, millennia. In any relationship between men and women on planet Earth, where a man passionately loves a woman and is ready for anything for her - we will see these 5 rules in action.

Therefore, it is necessary to use them, not to use them is unreasonable. If you want to delve into male psychology even deeper, then I advise you to read the book "The truth about men that most women don't know."

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Most men accuse women of being materialistic. They say they need only the wealthy, so that they donate fur coats and take them to the seas. And under the pressure of feminism, they even declare that the fair sex should work no less than they do, and sometimes even more. But the influential wealthy men are of the opposite opinion.

“A man should invest in his woman!” - say all the successful representatives of the stronger sex. And why it is worth following this opinion for everyone who wants to achieve a lot in life

How to get rich quick

This is not just a saying that women dream of. This idea can be traced in all ancient traditions. After all, a woman is Goddess of Fortune Lakshmi. The happier and more satisfied she feels in a relationship, the luckier and more successful her husband will become. Everything is like in ancient mythology: people appeased the gods in order to get their support.

successful husband- it is the merit of the wife. And if she also thanks him for the good he has done, the husband will strive to do even more for the family and for her. Its potential increases several times. There is no giver and receiver here. Every investment a man makes in his woman returns to him in even greater quantities.

The better he takes care of her, the more beautiful and energetically stronger she becomes. In simple words, from an ordinary woman she will turn into a real muse. She will inspire a man to new achievements, and most importantly, support him in difficult moments of life. And as life shows, nothing motivates a man like a faithful and loving wife. There is even a proverb: "Behind every great man is a great woman."

A woman is not a man, it is hard for her to be content with little. She needs comfort, she needs beauty, she needs new impressions and emotions, and if a man is able to give it to her, he cannot find a happier, more loving and grateful woman!

Yes, there are female consumers - they do not know how to be grateful. But with them, the male potential quickly goes out. Therefore, every woman should never forget that she is a muse, and not just a representative of the fair sex, which a man must provide.

It would be great if people could give and give. Then surely all men, with the support of their beautiful women, would become successful and happy. Do you agree with this opinion? Tell us in the comments, and also share an interesting way to be wealthy with your friends on social networks!