Psychology of a married lover in relation to his mistress. Why me? Ideal for both partners

Relationships with a married man are complex and confusing. In addition, they are hotly discussed in society from a negative point of view. Few people take the side of their mistress, and this exhausts her. The impossible desire to become a wife leads to bad and sometimes terrible consequences. The situation is complicated by the appearance of a common child. A woman who decides on such a relationship must understand all the risks - she probably will not be able to get her beloved.

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    Relationship with a married man

    When falling in love with a married person, the first thing to do is to stop blaming yourself and thinking that a further happy life will never be achieved. You need to try to figure out why his appearance in fate happened. Perhaps this is far from a coincidence.

    Everyone knows that being the mistress of a married man is bad, shameful and unacceptable for society, but every day a woman does everything to connect her fate with a married man. It is necessary to decide whether all this is for the sake of a joint future or enough moments spent together. You need to answer this question without emotions, soberly assessing the situation.

    seduction of a married woman

    The reason for this choice

    Perhaps this is not a relationship between two people who feel comfortable together, but a relationship driven by addiction, passion, material interest, or other benefits.

    Perhaps the reason that a potential partner is married is that it is more convenient to meet with a man who is not free, so as not to enter into a serious relationship where you need to be responsible. It is necessary to think about whether the relationship will develop, whether the couple has a bright future, or after the outbreak of passion passes, jealousy of the wife will come.

    Funny relationships with a married man exist only in anecdotes. In real life, the status of a mistress is accompanied by a constant internal struggle, thoughts that the beloved spends a lot of time with his wife, that the relationship has no future, and as a result, in spite of everything, go to secret meetings with him, not thinking about yourself and your inner torment.

    According to psychologists, a woman who periodically chooses a married man for a relationship has serious problems deep inside. To date a married man means to fade into the background, to hide, not to text, not to call, not to wear perfume if asked. When relationships develop, every woman begins to justify a married man, looking for a possible way out of situations, and believes in his leaving the family. But he does not need this, since in such a situation only she suffers, and he is already doing well.

    A woman who wants to be a lover must be self-sufficient and positive. For some, it is important to raise their self-esteem by realizing that they are much better than their wife. But, surprisingly, after each meeting, he hurries home, because his wife is waiting for him there. After his departure, self-esteem instantly falls down.

    Married men do not leave the family for the sake of their mistress. Being present in someone else's life and being only temporary entertainment is a waste of your own time. A self-sufficient, self-respecting woman simply does not have the time and desire for a supporting role. She is not ready to hide the relationship and is afraid that her wife will find out.

    Why do men make mistresses psychology of a married man

    Such relationships from the point of view of psychology

    After the start of meetings with a married man, there is a feeling of lightness, increased attention. Thus, self-esteem rises to the limit: he is better than with his wife, he has fun and hugs, but not with her.

    After some time, it becomes difficult to share him with his wife, whom he is not going to leave alone, and love begins to develop into an addiction driven by jealousy, selfishness, the desire to get his own, the desire to prove to him that his mistress is much better than his lawful wife. Depending on such a relationship, there is an inevitable rejection of oneself, all interests are focused exclusively on a man and how to interest him even more.

    This kind of love is either salvation (a means to get rid of stress), or a means of filling spiritual and emotional emptiness.

    With a constant relationship with a married man, there are:

    • Decreased self-esteem: all the time and effort is spent on finding a reason to meet, call. I want him to be present in my life all the time. At this stage, the mistress already accepts the role of "fallback".
    • Internal imbalance: constant fluctuations between love and hate. There are frequent quarrels due to the fact that he does not leave his wife.
    • Crazy jealousy. If a man is cheating on his wife, then there is an option that there may be another one.
    • Loss of personal interests, motivation to work, reluctant meetings with friends, internal disintegration of personality.
    • Looking for constant excuses.

    When entering into a relationship with a married man, it should be borne in mind that he will not leave his family in the past. However, most mistresses sooner or later begin to want to take first place in his life.

    Fell in love with a married man

    How female psychology works

    Initially, everyone tells themselves that this state of affairs is completely satisfied. You don’t need a legal marriage, you just want to be with him and love him. These words are transmitted to the man in various forms, and the woman is not even aware of it. And then sobs, quarrels and requests to leave his wife begin.

    If it happens that a man nevertheless leaves his wife, new suspicions may arise (“he will cheat on me too”), distrust (secret meetings with his ex-wife), old grievances will surface (did not leave his wife for a long time). Thus, from the desire to create a full-fledged family, a woman goes into a state where she is already dependent on experiences and cannot live without stressful situations. Therefore, such a relationship will not be successful.

    Of course, in different situations everything is different. Building a relationship with a married man, a woman makes her own choice. If you want the relationship to continue successfully, then you need to do two things:

    1. 1. Remove rose-colored glasses. Do not hope with empty hopes that he can do everything for her, but right now he cannot leave his wife, that he has a difficult situation and you can wait, because the main thing is love.
    2. 2. Take time for yourself. You need to develop, expand the scope of interests, realize yourself as a person. You should not load yourself with his interests, and even more so you cannot solve his problems.

    Usually a man does not leave his family and does not go to his mistress, because he has created an ideal life: the family is saved, this allows him to avoid discussions in society and save his loved one (and his wife eventually becomes his own), while he has a parallel life, where he receives new emotions, surrounded by care and warmth.

    It is possible that a man feels much more emotions for his mistress than for his wife. He is overwhelmed by passion and love, he swears his love for her and promises to leave his family for her soon. In reality, nothing usually happens - a vicious circle of promises. Relationships do not develop, romantic enthusiasm and passion develop into accusations - this is usually the end of a relationship with a married man.

    A completely different situation is when both are not free. But even such a connection does not have good consequences. The fact is that a woman plunges headlong into a new relationship, and if she is married, she begins to deliberately destroy her family, unlike a man who shares communication with his mistress and his wife. A married lover may pay less attention to children, because of which they will suffer.

    Unplanned pregnancy

    Most often, when a mistress becomes pregnant, the man offers her to have an abortion. If she does not want to have an abortion, and the man insists on it, there is a feeling of betrayal. But it happens that, after analyzing the situation, he decides that now is really not the time for children.

    It is necessary to realize that the fate of the child is only in the hands of a woman. A man will not leave his wife, will not offer his mistress a hand and heart. The only thing that is possible is financial support. Each decides independently whether she is ready for this.

    In no case can one hope that when a child is born, a man will change. This can be understood by looking at the statistics - a lot of women are raising children alone. Even worse, if both are married in a relationship, then the husband of the mistress will be forced to raise someone else's child.

    The idea that a common child will become more important for a man than children who already have and live in a family should not be misleading. You will not be able to put pressure on your husband and manipulate him after the birth of the baby. A man is looking for a mistress in order that she will not load him with family problems. It is easy with a mistress - you can relax, and then return to your family. If the mistress began to create difficult situations, then the relationship loses its meaning.

    The decision to leave the child

    When deciding to keep the child and not associate him with a married man, you need to be patient in order to overcome this difficult stage. Life attitudes will change, as will the choice in men.

    Psychologist's opinion: you need to be clearly aware that a child should not be a way for a man to approach himself. If in his family he is an exemplary dad, then this does not mean at all that he will love a common child.

    To give birth to a child from a married man or not is solely the choice of a woman, you should not rely on mythical happiness and constantly justify a man. Giving birth and staying in mistresses is very difficult for psychological awareness. If earlier a woman considered her partner a patron, did not see her own responsibility, then right now she needs to grow up and make decisions not only for herself, but also for the sake of the existence of another person.

    It is necessary to get rid of the illusions about a happy joint family. After realizing that he has another woman, whom he is unlikely to exchange for something, you need to make the right decision and save yourself from worries and stress.

    parting time

    The main problem of every girl who decides to break off relations with a married man is that she wants to prove to herself that he cannot be without her, that he will ask for a return, understand the mistake and leave his wife. Here you need to understand that if the relationship is broken, then this should be a conscious choice.

    If, after parting, the relationship is resumed again, then everything will return to normal, and nervousness will only intensify. A man will understand that they can no longer do without him, so he will definitely not make any attempts to get closer.

    It is necessary to decide what such relationships give and what they deprive, in which case the decision will be made much easier. You should not convince yourself of his boundless love, this leads to dependence on him.

    Determine the state of things

    Relationships are not built on the mere feeling of need for someone. It is necessary to coldly and sensibly evaluate all the negative aspects of the situation:

    • constant concealment of such a connection from friends and acquaintances;
    • lack of uncertainty, vague joint future;
    • the dependence of love dates on the wife and her routine, plans;
    • the presence of another family and a woman with a beloved man.

    He is married, his life has long been established and limited by its own rules, especially since he spent his strength, time and money on creating a family. And he achieved it. He is used to it, so even if he is not happy with everything, nothing will change. It is more profitable and easier for him to find another woman on the side who will not make claims - this is exactly what men in mistresses love. According to statistics, most men treat their mistresses this way.

    If a decision is made to part with a beloved man, this means that the limit has come and it makes no sense to wait for something supernatural. Begins to overcome fatigue from constant excuses that lead nowhere.

    To be a mistress means to lead yourself into a dead end. Developing unhealthy relationships is pointless. All the same, they will end with questions about why all this was necessary and what to do now.

    Assess the prospects

    It will be quite difficult to break off relations with a married man, since there is already an emotional dependence on him. In order to break it, you need to remember the bad. How painful it was when, after several hours of dating, he returned to his family, or those moments when his wife called him. After a conscious analysis of emotions, the mood to break off relations with a married man will become available.

    You need to understand that such a relationship can continue for years without developing in any way. He will not leave the family just because of another. It is necessary to assess the situation from your side and from his side, from relatives and girlfriends, colleagues.

    Relationship between promises and reality

    The scheme of a healthy relationship: the personal interests of the first partner + the personal interests of the second + the common interests of the couple. But it is unlikely that common interests will arise if the main goal of the relationship is to hide.

    Breaking off a relationship with a married person is very difficult, as well as getting out of other dependent relationships. This is due to overwhelming fear and doubt. When you try to leave, you feel an experience, a search for ways to alleviate the moral state, and it seems that only he can support - although he is the culprit of the problems. And again everything starts in a circle - old grievances are remembered and a new round of problems joins.

    Open eyes

    It is necessary to evaluate the possibility of your desires to come true. Most want to be close to their man, waiting for his care and, in the future, family. The man says that this is exactly what will happen, that life with his wife is only a temporary situation, that he has long ceased to love her and does not have sex with her. A woman most often believes that this is exactly what will happen.

    But in practice this rarely happens. If there are no actions of a married lover in relation to his mistress to approach a joint future and the question arises of breaking the relationship, then this is the best solution.

    The advice of psychologists says: you need to remember that neither other people, nor casual relationships, nor going to work can get rid of addiction. It is important to work on yourself. It is necessary to tune in to work on your own desires, the understanding of which will lead you out of such a relationship. This inner change will bring only the best.

    Relationship psychology distinguishes three stages of parting with a married man:

    1. 1. Conversation. There should be an absolutely honest and adequate conversation about the future. A deadline must be set and actions to be taken must be indicated. The goal is not to hear empty promises again, but to understand what the relationship is like at the moment and whether they have a happy future. If it makes sense to continue the relationship, then you can try, but with one condition: what exactly should be done within a certain period. If there are no prospects, and vain promises are pouring in, it's time to part.
    2. 2. Understanding. Compare what was heard with the idea of ​​the future. In practice, psychologists advise to imagine this relationship in five years. If there is an awareness that parting is inevitable, then you should not delay this moment. There is no point in being in an unpromising relationship on purpose.
    3. 3. Shift the focus. If it is not easy to cut off contact with a partner very abruptly, then switching will help. You can continue to communicate with a married man and not direct efforts to get rid of the role of a mistress. At this time, a new activity, a hobby, is needed, set a personal goal outside of this relationship, even if this goal harms the relationship. It will even be better if she comes first. Filling the personality with new facets, you need to gradually leave the dependent circle and become not a particle of a partner, but a well-formed and self-confident personality. It is also important to acknowledge your feelings (love, disappointment, and so on), but try not to get rid of them, but to switch your attention to something completely different. Time will pass, and there will be no trace of psychological stress.

    The main thing is not a proof of strength, independence and superiority, but the desire for one's own peace of mind. When the time comes, you just need to tell him everything, explain, the relationship ends. The reason should be the lack of real joint plans for the future and the desire to become happy. Let him not hold.

    If a man does not let go

    If earlier, when meeting a woman, she looked one hundred percent, now let her be ordinary in her every appearance: without bright makeup, styling. It is possible that the home image will repel a lover. You can become capricious, nervous, torment him with calls and messages.

    You should not make your wife find out about the connection - this will not lead to anything good, there will be many unpleasant consequences.

    According to the signs of the zodiac

    The prospects for marriage can be assessed by the month in which the man was born:

    • Aries. Representatives of this sign often have more than one mistress, often poorly conspiring. In the case of a scandal, they are impulsive, the consequences of communication can be serious, up to leaving the family, but often they return. The exception is a strong love for a homeowner.
    • Taurus. Rarely hovering in the clouds, the main purpose of a mistress is the satisfaction of sexual needs. Usually, all conditions of communication are negotiated in advance. With women, they are generous in material terms.
    • Twins. They prefer to start an office romance. They are efficient, have remarkable intelligence. They can choose a mistress for further family life if she is smarter than her wife.
    • Crayfish. They are very afraid of publicity, they value their family. A married man and a free woman can only be together if there are scandals in his family.
    • A lion. This sign gets a mistress just for sex. The ideal lover for him is one who is not looking for family relationships. Treats a free girl like a trophy.
    • Virgo. Very careful, often the mistress does not know about her real status. If the wife found out about the relationship on the side and kicked out, then they will not come to her to fall at her feet. But divorce does not mean the beginning of a new family with a lady of the heart.
    • Scales. Located to calm ladies, outwardly attractive. Such a person can become attached to his mistress and go to her if she is young.
    • Scorpion. In this case marriage is not possible. Mistresses get the simplest role in life - the satisfaction of sexual pleasures. Often this is even explicitly stated. You must first ask yourself whether it is worth dating such a man.
    • Sagittarius. Considered the most unpredictable. Prone to adventure and adventure, it is not clear what to expect from him. Can choose a mistress, and then abruptly disappear from her life.
    • Capricorn. Here, the mistress has few prospects. The exception is the situation when the wife is a bitch and a vixen, in which case there is an opportunity to become the best.
    • Aquarius. An affair with a married Aquarius rarely bode well. The right wife for him is an experienced, reliable friend and like-minded person, educated, financially wealthy. Only then does she have a chance.
    • Fish. They are the easiest to start novels. The mistress becomes the only and desired, but it is hard for them to make the decision to destroy the family.

    After the end of the relationship, you need to get rid of all the contacts of the ex-man, erase all messages, clean email, block everything on social networks. A person must completely leave the life of a mistress. If this man works or lives nearby, you can resort to a radical method - quit or move. It is necessary to get rid of all things reminiscent of him.

    And some secrets...

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    I was especially depressed by the eyes, surrounded by large wrinkles, plus dark circles and swelling. How to remove wrinkles and bags under the eyes completely? How to deal with swelling and redness?But nothing ages or rejuvenates a person like his eyes.

    But how do you rejuvenate them? Plastic surgery? Learned - not less than 5 thousand dollars. Hardware procedures - photorejuvenation, gas-liquid peeling, radiolifting, laser facelift? A little more affordable - the course costs 1.5-2 thousand dollars. And when to find the time for all this? Yes, it's still expensive. Especially now. So for myself I chose a different way ...

Many women are interested in the question of why men have mistresses. Especially when initially nothing overshadowed the marriage union, there was sincere, true love. But somewhere she gave a crack and everything went awry.

In general, if we consider the psychology of a married man, then if he has real and sincere feelings for a woman, he naturally will not even think about his mistress. The beloved woman for him will always be in the first place, from the fact that she is called beloved, that there are no others.

The only problem is that not everyone understands what true love is. If we consider the meaning of this word, then it means a disinterested, selfless interest in another person. The desire to be his support, support, to share with him all the sorrows, troubles, and not just happy moments. The ability to brighten up gray everyday life and develop together.

And when there was no love at all, then over time a new hobby may appear. More vivid, interesting, fascinating, in the form of a relationship with a mistress.

This is especially true when the initial relationship prior to marriage was based solely on sexual interest, attraction, and falling in love.

Such relationships begin passionately, but the passion fades over time, the emotions fade, weaken, and eventually become blunted. Nothing causes emotional excitement, awe, and in order to feel it all again, married men find relationships on the side. but that's not the only reason.

There is another no less significant - disappointment and a desire to get away from problems. This is especially the case when a man idealizes a woman, endows her with the desired qualities, or does not notice shortcomings. But they still show up over time. And then there is a natural desire to find an outlet.

A relationship with a mistress for a married man is a kind of escape from problems. The desire to resurrect dead emotions, to get new impressions. Especially if nothing in family life pleases.

But the relationship with a mistress is inherently easy, not colored by family problems, there is no need to bear responsibility. In addition to the fact that he sees his mistress most often in a good mood, she is always well-groomed, beautiful. Here the very image of a woman is pleasant, light, carefree, then there is already a desire to have a good time with her and often continue the relationship in the same easy and format.

As a result, we can conclude that in a relationship on the side, a married man is looking for something that he does not find in the family and finds in the character of his mistress. She can tie him to exactly what he lacks.

How to become the best mistress of a married man psychology

  1. In principle, women who want to become the mistress of a married man should be prepared for the fact that the role of a mistress is not enviable and not permanent. Especially if a married man has something to lose, and he has a lot to do with his wife - money, property, children.
  2. But on the other hand, if a woman can give more or become more significant for him, then there is a possibility of continuing the relationship.
  3. What does it take to become the best mistress of a married man psychology
  4. Find out all his strengths and weaknesses. But this is not necessary for manipulation, if a man notices that he is being manipulated, then it is more likely that he will end the relationship. Knowing his strengths and weaknesses, it is easier to become more significant in his life. And accordingly, show that he means a lot in your life.
  5. Next comes the ability to give, just do not confuse it with the ability to please. It just doesn't fit here. The ability to give here means psychologically. After all, every man wants to see that he is needed, appreciated, understood. And the extent to which you give him understanding, attention, spiritual strength, to the extent that it will return to you in the form of affection.
  6. It is equally important to always be in good shape. This applies to good health, well-groomed appearance and slim figure and beauty of clothing. It is necessary to make sure that after meeting with you, the man has only the best memories, and the more there are, the stronger he will again be drawn to you.
  7. Create an atmosphere of celebration and relaxation for him. After all, if he is drawn to such a relationship, then he is tired of gray everyday life and routine, and he wants new experiences, which he does not receive in the family.
  8. Find out more about his life, interests, dreams, and what he lacks. If possible, become a like-minded person for him, a true friend with whom he can share what worries him. One of the rules of psychology says that we like those who understand us, support us, share our thoughts. We usually become attached to such people very quickly.

Married mistress of a married man psychology

More complex and confusing option. Usually this happens when a man and a woman have children, a family, a job, but something is missing in their family life. Everything is perceived as familiar, uninteresting and boring. And then you want new impressions and emotions.

Such relationships can develop in unpredictable ways. They can either break at any moment or continue indefinitely. Since this form of relationship is convenient in that you do not have to bear responsibility, delve into and solve problems on the side.

Meetings take place at a convenient time, there are no obligations. There is more freedom, however, illusory freedom. Since they will not be able to fully reveal their relationship to others and have to hide them.

The younger the man and woman, the easier it is for them to have such relationships and the easier it is to hide. But the older they get, constant secrets, fear that they don’t find out about the relationship, can turn into a neurosis, and a headache.

Psychology of married men in a relationship with a mistress

But if we talk about the psychology of married men in relation to their mistresses, then often the attitude towards them is not serious. After all, the relationship was built on easy communication without obligations, where the main goal was to have a good time, to have fun. But sooner or later they will end, which will immediately affect the relationship.

It doesn’t cost him anything to end a relationship with a woman with whom he has nothing to do. Passion ends, emotions become dull, and if there is no attachment, then it’s not easy for a man to leave a woman. Many men break up with women easily.

True, there is such a type of men who are easily and permanently attached. But these are usually soft men, with a vivid imagination and a fine mental organization, who perceive the world emotionally. But most women call such men weak.

And reach out to the strong, sometimes perceiving the rudeness and rigidity of character as masculinity and strength. Naively believing that with her he would not be the same as with others. With her, he will be a gentle kitten. Only now such men are more guided by the instinct of the male, and his task is, no matter how trite it sounds, in fertilization.

They are alien to the emotional perception of love, this perception is reduced solely to instincts and entertainment. But on the other hand, women are still drawn to brutal men.

As a result, we can conclude that a man who is not endowed with subtle perception, emotionality, gentleness, sincerity, will easily find lovers, leave and find new ones again.

Why does a married man need a mistress psychology

As mentioned above, married men find mistresses in order to:

  • Take a break from family problems, everyday life and gray everyday life
  • Resurrect lost emotions
  • Get new experiences
  • Feel the novelty of sexual relations
  • Find understanding, an outlet
  • Have a relationship without obligations that can be ended at any moment
  • It is not excluded the desire to flirt, love adventures

The psychology of the relationship between an unmarried man and his mistress

In general, they are no different from the options described above. Except, if a man is lonely, not spoiled by female attention, and has a soft, sentimental character, then he will quickly and permanently become attached.

And vice versa, if a man is not characterized by emotions and affection, he is spoiled by female attention, then it is unlikely that he will appreciate this relationship. Moreover, some men are characterized by a desire to get new sexual experiences with a new woman. Only relationships built on sexual impressions, passion, are not durable. But here everyone chooses what he likes.

How to stop being the mistress of a married man psychology

If you want to stop being the mistress of a married man, then you will have to put him before a choice. Or he officially recognizes a relationship with you. Or the relationship will have to end.

In the latter case, you will have to delete everything related to a married man. And switch your attention to more interesting events. In principle, many psychologists give such advice. And of course it is very difficult at first. But this happens only at the beginning, especially if you yourself are very accustomed to a man.

But the less contacts, meetings, communication with him, the faster this attachment will leave and die. For the best effect, it is advisable to find yourself a new acquaintance. As the saying goes, a wedge is knocked out with a wedge. That's it a new acquaintance with another man can quickly heal from affection and memories.

What is it like to be the mistress of a married man psychology

In general, the fate of lovers is not enviable. You have to hide a lot, be on the sidelines in the life of a married man and invest a lot in relationships in order to save them.

After all, you will have to create a good atmosphere for meetings, constantly make sure that the man is comfortable and good with you. To make him happy with everything, listen to him, pay attention, and nothing in return. His lion's share of attention will still go to children and family, wife and all relatives. And only then, what remains, then the mistress will receive.

And the mistress will have to constantly invest a lot in relationships in order to maintain the attention of a man. On the one hand, there seems to be nothing wrong. But from the point of view of psychology, when a woman invests a lot of effort for a man. The man begins to take it for granted. It is easy to get and he has nothing to lose.

And another catch is that when a woman invests a lot of effort for a man, the significance of a man for him increases. After all, she did so much for him and she no longer wants to lose him. But for him, the importance of women is reduced. Especially when he did nothing for a woman, what did he have to lose.

This often happens when there is no equality, sincerity, or naturalness in a relationship. And when they are built on the personal, selfish desires of a man to satisfy his passion or other desires, without paying attention to what the mistress wants. Therefore, she will not be in his first place.

Why does a married man need a constant lover psychology articles

Most often, such men get used to, become attached to another woman, but there is not enough strength and confidence to choose who he needs more, a lover or a wife. It is not easy for all men to break off relations with their wife, especially if there are a lot of things that connect them.

The absence of what he lacks in the family, he finds in his mistress. When it is constant, then there are many fewer problems. She can be trusted more, there is no need to look for another mistress again.

Treat permanent mistresses like a second wife. There may already be more responsibility, seriousness, and a desire to help in a difficult situation. But only here the concept of a constant lover is relative. Because nothing in life lasts forever.

Today I want to consider the psychology of relations between a man and a woman in a slightly different plane. She is free and beautiful. He is interesting, successful, but MARRIED.

Such an alliance is found in the modern world quite often, since it has ceased to be something forbidden and condemned by society. Previously, loving a married man was considered a misfortune and a shame for a woman. Today this is perfectly acceptable.

Do you want to know why married men willingly "get in touch"? Would you like to understand why they do not leave the family? And how to behave with a married man?

Then let's figure out WHAT is a relationship with a married man and WHERE does it lead?

Danger! Keep out

Doesn't it seem strange to you that such a warning only works on a transformer? Because it really kills!

Everything else that does not kill immediately is questioned, because between the action and the result lies - PLEASURE.

What pushes a man to get in touch on the side?

- novelty of sexual and emotional sensations
- sexual dissatisfaction, fear of fading youth (you have to do everything), the desire to prove to yourself and friends that he is still GO-GO
- the need to establish itself in the status of a solid, modern man who can afford to maintain a chic passion
- not too high moral principles, in other words, if a man is a womanizer
- lack of understanding from the wife,

A man is looking for an outlet, a holiday, new sensations that energize him, amuse his pride, make him feel confident and satisfied.

Moreover, a NORMAL man, and many women, choose an affair with a married man, not considering him an unscrupulous scoundrel. He is aware that he is betraying his wife - a woman to whom he owes a lot. What does it mean?

At home, he tries to justify himself in his own eyes, to atone for his guilt. He becomes more attentive to the wishes of his wife,. He tries to be more gentle and new in bed, putting into practice the mistress's chips.

The mistress, unwittingly, STRENGTHENS the marriage of her lover.

Why does a woman need a relationship with a married man?

For a woman, a relationship with a married man, no matter how strange it may sound, is also very, very attractive. Here you can distinguish between sound arguments and misconceptions.

Sound arguments - a woman knows what she wants:

A woman gets a man "ready to eat", he is full, well-groomed, already successful - this is the psychology of a mistress.
- No need to shoulder a seemingly monotonous life - cook breakfasts, lunches, dinners, wash dishes, clean, wash, iron ...
- A man is perceived as a gift in a festive package, while a wife deals with a man without a wrapper.
- A woman does not want to get married today and now, but she also does not smile to remain alone. Therefore, dating a married man is ideal for an open relationship. No one owes nothing to nobody.
- A wealthy man is able to improve, and sometimes very tangibly, the financial situation of his mistress.
-Insecure women with low self-esteem explain their actions by the fact that there are not enough good men for everyone, they are ready to be content with a piece of the pie.

Misconceptions:

A woman is confident in her exclusivity. She sincerely believes that EVERYTHING will be different with her, not as hundreds of former lovers tell in their memoirs.
- Naively believes in the man's promises to leave the family... LATER.
- Afraid to be alone, so ready to remain on the sidelines.

Each person has their own arguments. Each of them has the right to life. Everyone is free to make their own decisions, make their own mistakes, because they learn only from their own mistakes.

If there is no taboo on having a relationship with a married man, most women, having experienced the spell of someone else's husband, will succumb and risk experiencing the taste of the forbidden fruit on themselves.

I will not moralize on why a relationship with a married man does not have the right to exist.

Relationship with a married man

I want to reveal to you TWO regularities which, like any law, operate independently of our consciousness.

1. A man leaves not where it is BETTER, but from where it is UNBEARABLE. Mistress is absolutely NOTHING to do with it.

If the relationship in the family burned out, the marriage turned out to be a mistake (this sometimes happens), it will fall apart regardless of whether the man has a mistress or not. Do not happen this, no charms.


2. Needs INCREASE over time
.

No matter how good it is today, tomorrow you will want more ... . A man cannot satisfy this need. Why? Read the first law.

Now let's strike a balance.

A woman invests in a relationship:

- soul and body
time is the most valuable and irreplaceable resource
- the future, pushing it back indefinitely

Gets:

- attention and care - a teaspoon per day / week / month (select the one you need)
- a small part of material wealth, while the husband would bring all the income to the house
- unsettled personal life
- lack of confidence in the future

But these weapons must be used. Use SKILLLY and CONSTANTLY. To use = to be. Amen:).

Thank you for your attention.

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Often the psychology of the relationship of married lovers is due to the lack of continuation. The desire to get close to people burdened by the bonds of marriage is explained by the reluctance to leave one's own family. After all, the appearance of a free partner imposes responsibility for the further development of communication.

The general reasons for the appearance of third-party sexual intrigues with not free people are revealed by three main aspects: sex, romance, communication.

Previously enchanting sex is gradually becoming monotonous. Physical intimacy becomes boring, the mysterious act of love becomes a common marital duty.

Wise wives try to bring novelty, invent various ways to diversify the intimate sphere. However, often attempts to awaken the former passion end unsuccessfully. The emotional level remains the same. Having lost interest, the spouses start third-party affairs.

Another sexual partner gives vivid sexual sensations, brings a previously unknown experience. Third-party connections are attracted by the opportunity to experience the variety of sex. Physical contact helps to experience positive emotions, the joy of discovery. There is a feeling of uncertainty, there is a desire to experiment.

Lack of romance

Initially, relationships are always pleasing with romance. Lovers worry, try to seem better. The fan diligently looks after: gives flowers, gifts, various pleasant little things, dinners - he tries in every possible way to please the lady of the heart. The chosen one also maintains a loving atmosphere: arranges romantic evenings, always looks perfect, prepares surprises.

The period of cohabitation is coming. Relationships gradually become boring. The wife begins to attach more importance to the household, less to appearance. The husband ceases to give pleasure to his beloved with petty romantic amenities. A young couple is covered by a daily routine.

Romance is a necessary part of married life.

The cessation of romantic courtship creates the impression of the extinction of past tender feelings. Thoughts are clouded. A desire is born to fall in love again, because strangers seem much more romantic.

The appearance of a new object of admiration causes excitement. There is a desire to impress, delight, surprise. Emotions flare up again. A person needs to maintain the feeling of "butterflies".

Lack of communication

Simple human communication is also necessary for people who have been married for a long time. At first, lovers communicate a lot. Trying to please the interlocutor, they try to impress each other: they support uninteresting topics in every possible way, nod, pretending to understand, and tell various interesting stories.

Starting to live together, the spouses gradually reduce communication to a discussion of exclusively domestic issues. Less importance is attached to the inner feelings of the partner. The time for endless heartfelt conversations is over. However, the need to share impressions, express feelings, discuss significant personal topics remained.

Colleagues are often the newly chosen interlocutors. The employee can make up for the lack of communication. A sweet heart-to-heart conversation can turn into an office romance. Interest in the inner world gives rise to sexual attraction. It seems that a colleague understands perfectly, shares feelings, can console.

Why does a married man need a married lover

Acquiring a married passion, the husband is not guided by the intention to change his wife. The unfaithful chosen one understands that a woman burdened with marriage ties least of all needs a scandal. Usually the unfaithful spouse also fears the destruction of the marriage. The relationships of not free people often do not involve the creation of a new family.

Married mistresses are allowed to be given relatively less care. Free darlings begin to make demands. Having the opportunity to see a fan more often, an unmarried passion extorts constant attention. Therefore, a ringed lover is much more “convenient”. It is not necessary to care, talk, give warmth. The responsibility to make the wife happy belongs to the lawful husband. The main task of a fan is to give sexual satisfaction.

Self-affirmation is another important reason.

Representatives of the stronger sex are looking for any reason to compete. Men are flattered by the possibility of getting the woman they desire. Giving pleasure to someone else's wife gives a feeling of superiority over the lawful husband. This is a way of self-affirmation - to feel your own significance.

Sometimes the husband gets tired of playing the role of the head of the cell of society. Fulfilling the obligations of the breadwinner of the family is sometimes tiring. A tired spouse wants ordinary support. A young mistress is more often an expensive toy than an understanding friend. Therefore, cheaters prefer experienced wise women who are able to realize a lot. Often sensible persons who have received some life experience are married. The main criterion is the personal qualities of the newly elected passion, and not the status of marital status.

Someone else's wife will rarely try on a temporary man for the role of the next husband. Thus, the cheating spouse is insured. A married passion usually wants to save their own marriage. The risk of destroying several families at the same time frightens both. Therefore, a married mistress of a married man can cause a minimum of unpleasant consequences.

There is no need to give expensive gifts. First, it is proper for a lawful husband to pamper his wife. Secondly, it is difficult to explain to the spouse the origin of the things that have appeared. Soon after a short admiration for an expensive present, an autopsy of deception will follow.

Relationships between married lovers involve secrecy. Those who want to save families need to be extremely careful. Fearing exposure, married lovers and mistresses guarantee mutual maximum confidentiality. The same dangerous position ensures mutual coordination of actions.

Why does a married woman need a married lover

The psychology of interpersonal relationships partially explains the behavior of a married mistress. This kind of intimate relationship helps to avoid misunderstandings.

Usually cheaters pursue the same goal - a short-term romance that is incapable of destroying the marriage.

Refusal to develop an extramarital relationship discourages the desire to have a free guy who wants to continue.

The presence of a non-free gentleman saves time. There is no need to explain the impossibility of meeting too often. A free chosen one may want to spend more time together. Therefore, you can easily let him go home immediately after physical intimacy.

The absence of family obligations also favors the appearance of a busy gentleman. A married passion has enough family responsibilities at home. Feeding, cleaning, washing, ironing will be the legal wife. Lovers can only enjoy. Romance is not overshadowed by everyday issues. A secret relationship is constantly accompanied by exceptionally pleasant moments.

Many women consider married men to be experienced lovers. Having not received sexual satisfaction in marriage, desperate wives hope to experience pleasure in the arms of a ringed seducer. There is no need to teach a knowledgeable sexual partner. In addition, he also wants to get new sensations. He is also tired of the monotonous marital sex, so the chosen one tries to give the new passion maximum pleasure.

Some representatives of the weaker sex also enjoy the seduction of other people's companions. The nature of the predator causes an irresistible desire to take possession of busy husbands. A kind of game gives the temptress pleasure. She feels a surge of energy, self-esteem rises. A third-party relationship with someone's spouse exalts the seductress in their own eyes.

Many different reasons to have an unfree sexual partner are complemented by a minimal risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections. A family man, albeit an unfaithful one, usually observes cleanliness. Various diseases are conducive to the exposure of adultery, so changeable husbands monitor sexual health.

Prospects for the development of the novel

Having fallen in love, a married lover and a married woman, whose psychology of behavior did not imply the development of relationships, run the risk of falling in love seriously. A minor affair is sometimes fraught with the destruction of two families. And not always the decision to disperse is justified. Sometimes it seems to lovers that by leaving previous spouses, they will be able to find true happiness. However, in reality, good sexual partners often turn out to be absolutely incompatible in everyday life.

In addition, divorce is preceded by a painful solution to the dilemma: marriage or "fabulous" love. However, the long-awaited passion quickly disappoints. A previously romantic chosen one, who seems to be the hero of a love story, is quite ordinary, no better than a former spouse. The same goes for the ideas of men about a mistress.

It seems that the secret romance is able to last indefinitely. However, according to statistics, such a relationship lasts about 3 years. Then comes the understanding of the true value of the family. Having gained useful experience, having made a mistake, the traitors begin to value legitimate partners more. Having understood the mistakes, the stumbled spouses try to strengthen the marriage union.

Conclusion

The psychology of the relationship of lovers who are legally married can explain the changeable behavior of spouses. However, it is worth thinking three times before starting a third-party relationship. The outcome of such intrigues is fraught with the destruction of not one family, but two at once. In addition, children suffer. Therefore, it is desirable to analyze the possible consequences well. It is probably worth re-evaluating the importance of family ties by trying to renew old feelings.

Every woman, even if she does not show her appearance, is afraid that her husband will start cheating on her. Subconscious fear makes her tense, jealous, which, in turn, negatively affects the relationship of the spouses.

One of the most common points of view on this problem is that a man gets a mistress because his wife stops turning him on. However, the cooling of feelings between spouses is only one of many reasons.

A man can go to the left because of the desire to bring variety into his life, including sexual. Finally, out of simple curiosity.

The reason may also be the desire to prove something to their friends, who brag about having mistresses. In addition, it is possible that the man knew that he would cheat on his wife even before the wedding: in this case, we should talk about the wrong upbringing or the wrong model of behavior inherited from the father who cheated on his mother.

It is likely that the cheating man - just a womanizer, ready to drag behind any skirt - here, too, we need to talk about the defects of education.

Ordinary alcohol may well become a catalyst for treason, and such a catalyst is the influence of a society in which the moral core has recently rotted. Strongly affects the subconscious of men and the information that pours on people from the TV screen, from the pages of newspapers or from the Internet.

It was the mass media that formed a deliberately easy understanding of treason in society. Today, lovers are the heroes of jokes, sayings, sketches on television. All this is deposited in the minds, little by little strengthening a destructive and even criminal position in men: a real man must have both a wife and a mistress.

In most cases a man goes on treason quite consciously, justifying it by the influence of alcohol, cooling to his wife, the difficulty of the life situation, and so on. According to statistics, in our country men cheat on women much more often than in Europe.

It so happened that the social role of men and women is very different. For example, one can hear opinions that a man does not cry, a man should always be strong, a support for the family, a man is a breadwinner, and so on. All this is correct, and men prefer not to argue with these statements. But they really realize their responsibility when they tie the knot. Family relationships involve taking responsibility for your wife and children. A man has a whole list of new responsibilities.

The burden of responsibility begins to put pressure on a man much more strongly and, to some extent, betrayal can be an attempt to somehow alleviate this pressure, which, however, cannot be considered an excuse.

Over time, a man ceases to feel young and strong: a natural change in the life stage begins. Youthful enthusiasm is being replaced by masculine principles and values. This is family, stability, work. A man's intellectual level rises, he becomes much more stable emotionally.

But it may also be that, looking back, a man begins to understand that he has achieved very little in life, regrets the missed opportunities and begins to look for the reason for his failure. Male stress should not be underestimated. Realizing the missed opportunities, attending a disgusting job, a man may decide that his best times are behind him, but he did not have time to do anything. In this case, the representative of the stronger sex may well be in the arms of a comforting mistress.

It is known that society stigmatizes an unfaithful wife in every possible way, calling, to put it mildly, a fallen woman, but sometimes she exalts a man who has changed, calling him a macho or Casanova. Such epithets flatter the traitor who does not even suspect that he is more of a loser than a macho.

Most often, the representatives of the stronger sex give birth to mistresses during a midlife crisis - at thirty or forty years old. Younger men prefer short-term relationships in this case.

Due to the wrong guidelines observed in society, the presence of a young mistress has become a sign of a man's high status. That is, the "real boss", to some extent, is simply obliged to be in a love affair with his beautiful secretary. This is part of the image. Often such a man is not at all worried that his wife will find out about his adventures.

In general, the image for the stronger sex is very important. Sometimes a mistress is taken in order to prove to the “city and the world” that a man is still full of strength and energy, and to disguise some complexes and insecurity. In this case, they choose as mistresses, usually young girls. By cheating on his wife with a young man, a man experiences new sexual and emotional sensations, presenting everything that happens as an adventure, a game in which you can prove that he is still in perfect order.

A very real reason may be the desire of a man to get some kind of benefit. For example, to get promoted. For the stronger sex, self-realization is extremely important, and in order to achieve success, men often stop at nothing. Of course, after everything happened, he will experience pangs of conscience.

If a man is a womanizer, then in this case they say that only the grave will correct the hunchback. Even if his girlfriend or wife is perfection itself, he will still look for an opportunity to assert himself on the side.

In rare cases, a man considers his mistress as his future wife, due to the fact that his true marriage is in a precarious position. But, when a divorce occurs, most often a man leaves not only his wife, but also his mistress. The thing is that in his subconscious, this woman is also one of the components of an unsuccessful marriage.

A woman who has learned about infidelity should not count on a successful outcome, or try to bind a man to herself, using children for this purpose. As a result, there will be only scandals and all kinds of troubles in the family.

Sometimes it happens that having been married for a long time, a man suddenly finds his true love. However, this is not a guarantee that he will go with this woman to the registry office: most likely, the habit will not allow him to cut the Gordian knot.

Obviously, the wife will do everything so that the husband and the father of her children do not leave the family. Many women forgive betrayal in order not to destroy their usual way of life.

Inexperienced girls fall into a kind of trap, whose ideal is an adult, accomplished man. The cheater swears an oath to such girls that he will leave his wife, but, of course, he does not even think of fulfilling the promise. Young ladies simply do not understand that the viability of this man is to a large extent the merit of his wife.

In order for life with a person to proceed in understanding and harmony, it is necessary to go through a thorny path of trials, the formation of a personality, maturation together, to go through a difficult grinding of characters. Men do not become men from birth, they are made so by life experience and learning from their own mistakes.

If a woman intends to maintain prosperity and happiness in the family, she must take into account the interests of her husband try to understand his thoughts and feelings. At the same time, you need to take care of yourself, while remaining attractive physically and intellectually.

One of the most common reasons for cheating is the thirst for novelty. Having a mistress is like a kind of escape from the monotony. So you need to carefully monitor so that family life does not turn into a severe test, a routine from which you want to escape for a breath of fresh air.

It is quite acceptable that the husband simply fell out of love with his wife. In this case, the most correct and honest of him would be to simply leave, despite the presence of children in the family. Children acutely feel when mom and dad do not love each other, and for them life in such a family will become more painful than the divorce of their parents.

Summarizing, we can distinguish the following reasons in connection with which married men have a mistress:

  • The desire to feel young and completely healthy again.
  • Looking for an opportunity to pour out the negative accumulated in the soul to someone.
  • The desire to get new emotions that the wife does not give.

However, the most common opinion is that the main reason for male infidelity is sexual dissatisfaction. As a rule, a long life in marriage is reflected in the intimate side of relationships and, unfortunately, for the worse.

Loss of sexual interest in wife encourages her husband to look for a mistress that can "ignite" a new fire in him.

Be that as it may, but the husband is cheating goes most of the time consciously, destroying the barriers and principles that guided him before. After the betrayal, he can only look for an excuse for his behavior.

It so happened historically that men tend to strive for polygamy - polygamy. In ancient times, men very often shared a bed with several women at once. This was considered not only the norm, but also a necessity - the more women become pregnant from the stronger sex, the higher the guarantee that among the children there will be strong and fit for survival. Similar behavior is observed in the animal world. Perhaps the reason why husbands have not one, but two, or even three mistresses, is genetic memory.

The consequences of such a lifestyle are usually deplorable. A man, as it were, "splits" himself, which is reflected in his physical condition. Heart attacks, strokes are very real consequences for unfaithful husbands.

Professional psychologists conducted a special study, during which it turned out that men of different ages have lovers for various reasons.

  • Until the age of twenty-five. This age is the process of formation and self-affirmation of a man. At this age, it is difficult for a representative of the stronger sex to resist the desire to have a large number of women, since he considers sex as a kind of subordination of a woman. At a young age, guys most often have an active sex life and such an aspect as quantity invariably dominates quality. Having tied the knot at this age, a man simply does not understand what is wrong with cheating.
  • Until the age of forty-five. With material values, moral principles, a man “brings” to this age a lot of unfulfilled desires of a sexual nature. And if for some reason he cannot realize these desires with his wife, the representative of the stronger sex goes “to the side”. The reason for this behavior may be "youthful maximalism", from which the man could not completely get rid of.
  • From forty five years old. This age is considered the peak of male infidelity. Moreover, men most often give birth to young mistresses. The psychological reason is simple - the approach of old age, the fear of impotence, the desire to take everything from life. During this period, the wife needs to show special tenderness and wisdom.

In addition to age aspects, the reason that men have mistresses is the crisis of family relations, which is divided into several stages:

  • After two years of marriage. Spouses already know almost everything about each other, sex is boring. The crisis is of an easy nature and to overcome it it is enough to bring variety to the sexual life.
  • After ten years of marriage. An extremely dangerous period: the couple thoroughly studied each other, all topics were thoroughly erased. Life, problems with raising children only add fuel to the fire. In this case, psychologists advise to take a break from each other by making a separate trip. Most likely, the spouses will understand that they are lonely and bad without each other.
  • After thirty years of marriage. Children have become adults, they have their own families, husband and wife have almost nothing in common. At this stage, joint care for grandchildren usually saves. It is clear that life is not an easy thing and sometimes presents extremely unpleasant surprises. But men are called the stronger sex because they know how to cope with their desires, fight difficulties and win. Family problems must be solved together, and not run away from them, forgetting in the arms of a strange woman. In the most extreme case, a man must find the strength in himself and confess to his wife that he has stopped loving her.

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It will be much more honest and correct than hiding, lying and looking for excuses. Everyone acts by virtue of his character and upbringing, you just always need to remember that there is no other person's pain.

Video: Why do men have mistresses

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    Fornication as a sign of a low level of human development (close to the animal level). Now there are very few people with a high level (highly spiritual), mostly the incarnation of animals, that's why they behave like this, and they have to live more than one life to get closer to perfection!

    This comment is very popular. Like or dislike? 40 21

    • What nonsense are you talking about? There is no god in Buddhism, it is in your Orthodoxy that there is a god, and it is your faith that asks for dough, and not only do you denigrate another religion, you also talk about your own ... I am an atheist and do not stand on the side of any religion at all. I'm just surprised at such people who believe and don't even know the essence themselves. facepalm.

      This comment is very popular. Like or dislike? 19 6

      Hidden comment. .

      you are mistaken... single women are also normal people... not everyone will climb into the family and begin to destroy it, but everyone has the right to happiness... including us, single women, and your husbands, the Lord ordered to share

    What a twisted bullshit. Man is the highest primate, simpler than a monkey. Like any monkey, he is lascivious and lustful, and this is NORMAL. Locking up natural male polygamy, denying it and considering it criminal is a crime against nature and common sense. There is only one way to defeat the institution of mistresses: to disperse and support polygamy, then all sexual partners and joint children will have equal rights.
    Raising the question of morality, it is worth remembering that monogamous marriage is less than 2000 years old, even the Old Testament kings and prophets had several wives. Polygamy is natural, a ban on it is immoral, as it is pride and possessiveness. Even an element of slavery.

    This comment is very popular. Like or dislike? 32 14

    the reason why I started it is not here. but really the reasons for the mountain. Let's start with the fact that my wife lives 6000 km from me in another country. but that's not the main reason... Now let's move on to the list of reasons ... ..
    what they wrote here, that a man needs to prove that he is worthy of something in society, etc., etc. ... believe me, this is not the most important thing .... A man has a physiological need for sex. but how can it be suffocated if the wife, even in those rare times when we meet, either diarrhea or scrofula .... those. then fasting is not allowed, then menstruation, then some other crap ... .. you involuntarily ask yourself the question, did she curl anyone in her village? Yes, and that's not all…. They imposed a mountain of restrictions on me, it’s impossible, it’s impossible and in general, just pray, God will help you in everything ... I have nothing against faith in God, but ... Let's look a little into the past, even before the wedding, the wife didn’t even know what such a God and didn’t even know how to dress in church….. And after the wedding it started…. and they always spread rot on me, that I am an unbeliever Thomas ... in a word, sex, as it turned out, is evil. although before the wedding he was the norm. I’m a man, I don’t have to prove anything to anyone, but a year without sex with a living wife is excuse me, but it’s absurd ... and even in those infrequent times when we meet, it’s sometimes impossible to fast, then monthly, then just not in the mood ... ..
    I didn’t see such a reason for making a mistress in the story, so I’m sharing my experience.

    This comment is very popular. Like or dislike? 37 2

    I am a brilliant invention of people who have received intellectual development, but have not overcome their fears of the opinions of others, and have not realized themselves in the sexual sphere.
    So, unfortunately, I am not a sign of intelligence, but a sign of problems.

    This comment is very popular. Like or dislike? 7 2

    many understand this problem, wives, husbands, psychologists, etc., but what is the use of what is happening and will actually happen, everything is actually simple (most people have fallen away from the system, i.e. where is your faith in God! Live according to the laws of the covenant and no psychology is needed .since the laws of God are written for people, not for animals, if you don’t believe in God, you don’t need to look for answers, be animals, it’s your choice, change, betray, condemn, etc.

    This comment is very popular. Like or dislike? 13 3

    You don't help with your advice. People have doubts, they do not want to destroy families, offend loved ones, etc.
    There will always be temptations, at some point it seems that everything will work ... And, at this moment, you need to do something with yourself. Find the strength to stay true, and they run low. How to reset your head? How to return the value of the relationship? Talk with half of the cleanliness? Not everyone will understand, many will be offended. Many cannot remain "cold" in treason - this is the collapse of the family! I realize it, I'm talking in hints, it doesn't get any easier!!!

    This comment is very popular. Like or dislike? 6 0

    I'm going to have a mistress for a banal reason - a banal lack of sex.
    Conversations, if they help, are only for a short time.
    And so there is a reason for everything - in the same room with the children, I feel bad myself, I'm tired, the children get sick in the children's teeth, I sit at the computer until night.
    There have been times like this before.
    At first everything was ok, then there were interruptions. After the birth of the first in general as cut off. Well, not quite, but almost. After the conversation, it recovered after a long time. Then it started again. And so on the cycle. Well, they spent a month at the resort - they had sex 2 times, the last time 3 weeks ago - the wife sits at the computer until late at night, because they say she goes to the dacha for a month and she won’t have a normal Internet there ... Will her husband be normal there?
    Doesn't want to don't, I'd rather have regular sex with my wife but I'll have to with others. And nothing will change my decision, I think. I regret the change - that I did not start a mistress several years ago.

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    • I am a single woman, and I receive a lot of offers of intimacy from married men, and of course, I am always interested in what makes them look for pleasure on the side?! The answer is always simple as a bucket: the wife not only does not satisfy in bed, she refuses intimacy under various pretexts. Do you think it's normal when a man, being married, says to another woman, oh, now would have sex, while having his wife at his side?! And in men, sexuality differs sharply from that of women, and all the same, he realizes it, if not with his wife, tpk with his mistress, whose head is not chatted, the tooth, which is not tired, etc.))) so there is reason for wives to think: a husband is not free application to your beautiful persona, they need to be dealt with too!!

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      I am married. I have been married for 11 years. I always seek sex. Either her head hurts, then her stomach, then her ass, then these days are critical, then she doesn’t want to after one time, then she will be surrounded by children. And I need 2-3 times at least for a night. Because of this, I can’t sleep and I’m sitting in a hundred, the Internet, and the craving to earn extra money has already disappeared and the most important thing, the passion for life, disappears. , women who respect and honor men. And if there are, they have long been shammed. Society implanted moral principles in me, but I'm tired of them, they cripple marriage, make men insecure, make them impotent and losers in life. The only conscience does not allow me to break loose and find the one for which he is ready to move mountains. We have three children. But the desire to even help around the house has disappeared. the wife's name is associated with rejection. But I need more than sex, I need love. and passion for a woman to flow and desire me. All that I earn I give to her for expenses. And in general I live for her, but in return I want true love, respect and acceptance of a man one hundred percent. you are “all goats and womanizers” impeccable wives you are ours - be born men and burn like us and smolder like coal - because instead of inspiration for exploits, you kill Men, and therefore Love.

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    I have been married for 25 years, sex is rare (once a year). But then a married lover (the same age) appears and so I raised both self-esteem and libido that I became just a sexual beast! I don’t recognize myself! The lover does not want to part with me, even though I suggested. She stirred up her husband for sex! She thanked her lover for the fact that he simply madly charged me with his sexuality. But I just buried myself at 44, like a woman!, Children, granddaughter, eternal problems, work, without holidays and days off! And now I look at everything through the prism of love!

    This comment is very popular. Like or dislike? 24 1

    All people are polygamous and women too, it's just that women are more afraid. Sex is a pleasure that must be received at any age. Only men do not know how to change “correctly” without hurting their wife (they definitely come across). And respected “honest” women, it’s not about decency and honesty, the saying “a good leftist strengthens marriage” just didn’t appear, this is worldly wisdom, but everything must be done with wisdom. Married for 17 years, happy, before the wedding, “just like that” started a conversation that they say I can’t stand men who cheat, that everyone knows about it and this humiliates their spouse. Apparently the hint was understood, at least I was not humiliated by the knowledge of the betrayals (of course, sometimes in the crisis years there was a suspicion). But I myself periodically make lovers, for a woman this is also important, and now throw me on the fire! I love my husband, but I really get bored with life and my beloved man too, and when you cheated, everything plays in family relationships, both at home and in bed.

    This comment is very popular. Like or dislike? 19 4

    We have been married for 45 years. All our life my husband has been cheating on me with different women. I know about this and am sick of resentment and humiliation. I am mentally ill and my physical health has deteriorated. I forgive and live. I've been dating the last one for 8 years. He does not leave his family and does not leave her. Both are tired of it. Now we are 64. I and he is 65. I had a heart attack and a tumor of the prostate gland. I don’t know how it will all end. She is 12 years younger than her husband, she is single. We meet with her 3 times a week. Advise how to live?

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    • I sympathize with you ... Just talk to your husband. Does he really love her or is it just a hobby for the sake of sex? Yes, and talk to her, ask the same question. Maybe he loves both you and her? And the same thing happens in life. Then live as you live. And there are many books and films on this topic - "the husband has a mistress, whom he does not hide." Perhaps you will find the answer to your question there. By the way, congratulations to your husband!

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    Wives marry husbands of husbands of wives, so there is no one to blame if the wife is tired at home or with children, strip her of her burden and try to make romance, but it’s easier to advise than to do and the wife should not forget that her husband needs sex, but the wife also forgets about it and it happens too often, probably more often than we would like, and it turns out that it’s not love that keeps people, but children and living space there is no experience of a happy family life, I don’t know if advice will help, but a competent specialist is needed because there are a lot of different moments and if you figure it out yourself, slide into a scandal if if you want hormones, persuade your partner to see a psychologist, I myself went through this after 30 years of family life, although I considered my family to be wrong until my husband went on a spree, don’t wait, think that life passes quickly and you need to live without creating problems, a headache and more pain, believe it hurts when the world around you is collapsing not only sex here and you don’t want to live, but it seems just a horror story until it touches you, I wish everyone not to bring this to their wives, but m snakes get confused explain themselves to wives to help them the efforts and skills of joint marriage are complex and must be on both sides one in the field is not a warrior

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    So I caught my husband in correspondence with his mistress: he is not looking for a whore, but a permanent chick to come periodically, as I understand it. Promises not to offend with money and gifts. Despite the fact that we are by no means millionaires and there is not enough money.
    I understand that he is looking for sex. Have sex once a week. I want more, I constantly try to stir it up, but no! They refuse me. He must want it himself - such an excuse. And if before the sex was great, now the classic 11 minutes.
    And so what should I do?

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    Oh my God! Read and wonder! How hard it is for men! The wife must do everything: the house, and the children, and work, and please her husband. What should a husband do? Did you go to work, lie on the couch and chat with your mistress? The family is the daily work of TWO, and not just the wife. And then the sex is normal, and the hostess, and the beauty, and they h ... on the side? And if you went, then don’t take this abomination home so that it still leaves traces of its presence.
    First of all, this is disrespect not only to his wife, but also to himself. I'm not talking about a whore. A normal woman would never do such a dirty trick. AND THIS IS JUST A SLUT. So, men, you need to respect yourself a little! That's why we are people, after all, that's why we differ from animals. Yes, anything can happen in life! So go to your mistress, don't humiliate your wife, and don't let a slut humiliate a woman who has lived with you for almost 30 years, has given birth to YOUR children. And didn't cheat, even though you don't deserve it! What kind of shit didn’t she pull out, that they didn’t survive together! Men, do not change worthy for affordable!
    Unfortunately, I am writing about my bitter experience!

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    I have several options for men who have mistresses. The situation is such a husband beats his wife, after going to his mistress, let him try to punch his mistress in the eye ... will she forgive him? see if they love forgive. Another option, through materiality, the husband fills up his lover with gifts, a candy-bouquet period, let him try not to give anything except sex, see if his mistress can hold out like a wife without money? if the situation is tense and the individual’s love goes off scale, then let him try to leave the family where the children stay with their mother with a suitcase, and say to the mistress they say I leave everything to the children, and our love will warm us ... I think many relationships will cease to exist, the material side of the issue often prevails. My brother was a businessman in his youth, I often watched a bunch of women trying to get him into bed with deceit or charms, even getting pregnant from some, and they tried to put pressure on his conscience, there wasn’t even a smell of love at all there were games going on, like in a war for my brother’s money, relatives had to look for a wife, and not him, because his entourage was conducted by a female hunt not for him, because by nature he was not a gift either, but for his money. If we are talking about love, then this is forgiveness, but a mistress will never tolerate a man’s mood swings, because she herself demands attention from him, then what they write here, the wife does not want sex, is a lie! there is no such woman who would even refrain from pleasant things, where the grass grows where we fertilize the soil more, you just don’t have to spend money on your wife, and if you would take them to a restaurant more often, they wouldn’t give penny perfumes, but those that they give to their mistresses, rented hotels not for mistresses , but for wives, I think their marital bed was no less burning with passion, everything is so banal, love is tested by time and mutual assistance, try not to cook dinner for your husband, and your husband’s mistress does not feed, he feeds her from the pocket of her grandchildren’s children, and sometimes he takes money from his wife on the flowers of his mistress. I especially read about the betrayal of grandparents. Youth, stupidity, you can understand, but old age is only comparable to insanity and cowardice to old age, that everything is behind you, but you want to rejuvenate, it’s funny for young people, I just remembered myself in my youth, how I treated old dads with compliments in my address with disgust, It seemed to me then that this perversion, when there were so many young guys, kissing for money with false teeth in my youth was somehow disgusting, forgive me the old farts walking around.

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    A mistress is a muse for those who are tired, a shadow and a reminder of those days when a wife wanted to conquer and conquer a man. Yes, you heard right, having children and marrying your man, you also need to surprise him every day and present surprises and raisins both in the bedroom and in everything. A lover is a mirror in which a man sees himself as a man, with all his virtues, and not just a wallet and hands. He feels that he is needed as a man and fulfills himself as a man, because as a husband and father he has already fulfilled himself, and his wife has short-sightedly calmed down seeing all this. A mistress is an outlet and a replacement for wine and a cigarette, a replacement for the Internet and films. Only, unlike the film, a man with a mistress is assigned the main role, honor and respect, affection and adoration, sex and pleasure, and most importantly, he meets reciprocity, sympathy and understanding , and not a desire to belittle its role and importance. Outshine him as a person, as a person and as a man. A lover does not let a man forget his destiny. Gives a flight of fantasies and fulfills dreams, with her he soars spreading his wings like a bird, to every feather. and love. A lover gives him the freedom to be who he wants and who he was born. A lover does not go against mother nature and the instincts of a man. But meeting such a lover is very rare, and marrying her is great happiness. Since she understands the true nature of men and she you don’t need to adapt to be a woman and yourself. The role of a wife is a solved task for her, as well as the role of a hostess in the kitchen. She doesn’t need to suppress a man in order to feel at her best. She can be jealous, but she understands that a man is not property and not a thing requires respect for itself, like any person. It is very rare to meet a mistress with whom you can relax both in body and soul, to find one in which a man sees a kindred spirit. In general, the concept of a mistress invented by the institution of marriage, but not by society. In fact, a lover is a “wife”, because it is she who always demands gifts, bonuses, concessions, a constant income, has the right to whims and refusals for numerous reasons. A lover, in fact, is more than just sex without boundaries and limits on time and frequency of repetitions. Now I only have a wife. She is the meaning of my life. and if I had a lover, she would bring all the colors of the rainbow into my life and fill it with more joy, the sun and colorful colors.


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