Politeness mistaken for sympathy. Signs of attention. Does he like your photos, songs and captions on social networks? Does it track changes on the page? Is he on guard when you are online so that he can write to you as soon as possible? If yes, that's a good sign.

Of course, you need to treat people politely and you don’t have to be rude to everyone. But sometimes there are situations when a woman needs to stop thinking about the limits of decency and be rude to a man. And sometimes you shouldn't do this, especially in inappropriate situations.

Why do you think men behave rudely? Of course, we reject the fact that he is simply a boor and a rude person. Oddly enough, in most cases a man begins to be rude when a woman behaves politely with him. Not understanding the nature of men, a woman believes that it is possible to treat them like human beings. This is a big mistake.

Politeness of women

During communication, women can be polite in two cases:

• When they think that there are rules of decency.
• Politeness to a potential boyfriend, lover or husband.

In these cases, women miss a simple rule - be guided by actions, not words. After all, due to the fact that you are polite to a man at the beginning or simply do not understand how and when you need to behave in this way, confusion sets in and you turn to rudeness.

Bad behavior, shouting, reproaches will not achieve what you want from any person.

Why do people express negativity? As a rule, this happens when we ourselves have brought ourselves to the point of being unable to contain everything that has accumulated. And they let it all accumulate.

One can give an example of false and true religion. True religion will never require or condone violence. And a false one allows it if it is in the name of God.

Thanks to these two different concepts, we can always justify the fact that a person splashes out negativity. But we cannot call him to do this. Therefore, a woman’s task is to be calm, confident and raise the status of her interlocutor.

The main thing is that you have as few situations as possible when you have to react to rudeness.

Many psychologists say that you need to learn control, not to throw out your anger, and so on. This is partly true But isn’t it better to avoid negativity than to contain it?

Oddly enough, polite female behavior in the eyes of men is precisely what causes rudeness. Why is this so? The fact is that a woman confuses a man’s attitude towards her as a function and as a person. And moreover, all conflicts arise precisely because you either do not understand what a function is or, on the contrary, try to be one. Such women do not need to develop; they do not produce anything in terms of communication or self-development. They have one thought - I want children, I want a husband. All. They don't need anything more.

The man understands this and, again, wants to save money. He knows that a woman wants everything, and therefore offers herself entirely. But for a man it’s expensive. Pay attention to how rich men behave. He showers the woman with money, gifts and other things, but at the same time makes it clear to her that she does not ask more from him, that is, children and marriage. All other men act the same way, only by different means. Some lie, saying what the woman wants to hear, while others actually marry a woman, because for him it costs nothing.

As they say, everyone pays with the currency they have a lot of or the one they don’t need. But still, most men remember the freebie. And you can achieve it very simply - make a woman fall in love with you. But there is a pitfall here - having fallen in love, she will become a burden. And then the man will have to either drain it or pull it on himself.

How do men try to make you fall in love with them?

The first stage is gaining your attention. And from here comes impoliteness, which manifests itself when you do not give a man the opportunity and chance to show himself. But when, out of politeness or because you like him, you give him a chance, the green light turns on. And if you are not comfortable refusing a man, this means “Try again.”

As soon as this light appears, the man will begin to act to achieve his goal. He will either convince you that you want the same thing or he will convince you that he is the solution to your problems.

To avoid this, exclude politeness from communication with men on the principles of decency, intelligence, decency. But at the same time, this does not mean that you need to send every man three letters. It is important to distinguish between common courtesy to all people and courtesy in accepting his actions.

For example, a woman sees a man she likes, and she begins to encourage his actions. Forgetting about their quality. Your politeness directed at men is a weakness that the stronger sex will take advantage of.

Or another example: a man wants to meet and communicate with an average woman. She immediately begins to check whether she is interested in him or not. If yes, she starts flirting with him. But if not, she does the same, because it is inconvenient for her to send him. For what? In the second case, the simplest and most effective way would be ordinary human communication or simply dismiss him. Without smiles and embarrassment.

A lot of troubles happen because of the false concept of politeness. Therefore, there is no need to use it where it is not needed. You shouldn’t encourage a man with politeness, it’s stupid to say the least. The main encouragement is acceptance of the continuation, permission on your part to come to you again and sleep with you. But nothing else.

But women always do the opposite.

If you are trying to buy or win a man with politeness, then tomorrow you will either have to yell at him or cry. Because he will perceive it as weakness.

Of course, if politeness for you is a form of communication, then no one forbids you to be intelligent and good. But in no case should this be a reward or a way of manipulation.

For example, you met a man, spent the night with him and he asks you if he can come tomorrow. You can answer “Yes, of course. I liked everything so much, you are so good and sweet” and a bunch of other adjectives. Or you can answer more simply: “Well, come, what can you do with you.”

For men, the main thing is the essence. Only in the second case, it will come in 99% of cases. And in the first, he will think whether he needs it.

Politeness, even when you want to lose a man, gives him a small chance. Politeness followed by agreement speaks of your weakness. After all, sometimes she lets a man know that you are already lying under him and it is better for him to go conquer other women.

And most importantly, politeness should not prevent you from conveying the essence to the man. Otherwise, he will perceive it as a deflection.

In addition, I would like to say a few words about love. A woman should never confess her love to a man and tell him “I love you.” This is humiliation on your part. In fact, men don't care what you say. What matters to them is what you do. If a woman washes, cleans, cooks, gives birth to his children, sleeps with him, then it is clear that she loves him. Why humiliate yourself and say this? Only a man should confess his love. Or if he himself asks you if you love him? Here you can joke and flirt. Otherwise, your price tag will drop and you will be a freebie. There is no need to wipe his snot with your declaration of love. He must earn it.

Cases from life

“We were sitting with a man in a restaurant. They brought the bill, he asked me to tell him the price, since he himself supposedly couldn’t see the numbers. For what?"

Perhaps he really didn’t see it, or maybe he wanted him to name the amount for which you sat with him, so that he would hear your value.

“Men don’t want to spend 24 hours a day with us. But when you tell them – spend time with friends, at least I’ll get a break from you, they get offended. Why is that?"

When a woman says that, it’s a breakdown for a man. He feels bad. It always sounds in his head - if I’m not there, my wife should always think about me and wait for me, even if she’s minding her own business. This is a male stereotype.

“Why, if a man loves his wife or woman, sex disappears. And if he doesn’t love her, then there is sex, and the man tries harder.”

No, that's not the point here. I would like to explain that love for a woman is an unconditional concept. You love your child not because he is beautiful, but because he is yours. Men don't have this. He loves a woman as a function. And sex for a man is not an act of love. This is an act of aggression. Sex is a use, not an expression of his love for her.

A man's sympathy for a woman– this is a combination of interest in a person with intimate interest as a potential partner. Women tend to look for hidden signs of men's sympathy for them, thus trying to avoid disappointment, looking for confirmation of interest and hoping that these signals will protect them from further disappointment. This often turns out to be a trap. A person tends to confirm his point of view by finding facts that are objectively not there, interpreting them according to dominant desires and, other things being equal, giving preference to that part of the information received that will help to obtain the desired conclusion. This is due to the reluctance to be frustrated and not get what you want. People love positive emotions and the fulfillment of desires, clear and banal understanding, rather than negativity and disappointment.

Relationships between people, especially romantic ones, are the source from which joy and satisfaction are expected. No one dreams of indifference, rejection and pain. I want reciprocity, love and joy. Therefore, when choosing how to interpret this or that signal (especially fleeting, unclear and non-specific) - as an accident or as a promise of love, unconsciously (and sometimes consciously, ignoring contradictory signals), priority will be towards the desired result.

It should be remembered that communication and romantic relationships between a man and a woman are dynamic, not static processes. There may be sympathy at the moment, but in the next few minutes it may fade away, because something is wrong or attention has switched to another object, or the signals being read were exaggerated and the interest was initially small and temporary.

Therefore, when communicating, you should not focus solely on the first signs and be surprised or upset if everything did not go as expected. By showing active attention to the interlocutor and communication throughout the entire time, you can see how the level of a man’s sympathy for a woman changes, increasing or decreasing. If you focus on one sign and then build communication from the position of “a look as a promise of love,” then the result, most likely, will not be pleasing.

A man's sympathy for a woman, how is it expressed?

When talking about liking in romantic relationships, nonverbal and verbal signs are usually mentioned. Expressions of sympathy are considered to be various features of facial expressions, behavior, and actions that may indicate a special interest on the part of a man in a woman.

In relationships, as in many areas, the most reliable indicator is action. Everything that is not said and done, as it were, does not exist and it is impossible to be confident in implicit, weak and conventional signs. An additional difficulty is that if a woman herself is interested in a man whose signs she is trying to read, then she is subjective, like an interested person, and would rather look for signals confirming sympathy than vice versa, in order to avoid disappointment and frustration. The assessment of girlfriends is subjective for the same reason, because there is no desire to upset, but there is a desire to support.

By and large, there are no restraining factors that could explain the lack of action. Culturally, a man’s activity is encouraged; moreover, for a long time (and at the moment to a greater extent) initiative was, in principle, considered exclusively on the part of a man. The social situation in the form of professional relationships may restrain obvious manifestations at work, but then there will be a desire to meet in an informal setting.

A direct expression of attitude, a declaration of sympathy, is the most obvious verbal sign of a man’s sympathy for a woman. Since this is not expressed immediately, but after some communication, it is more reliable, since the representative of the stronger sex already clearly defines interest for himself. Here you can pay attention to clarity and consistency. The notorious slips of the tongue, when, while speaking, a person accidentally uses other words, can be a sign of uncertainty in his words or a certain hypocrisy. If non-verbal signs can be a way of screening counter attention or have absolutely no personal connection, then here the process is already more conscious.

The downside is that words may also not be reliable, therefore, as a result, the conclusion can be assigned that the best sign is behavior, attitudes and actions. If all possible non-verbal signs are allegedly given, words are spoken, but there is no activity and no progression in the relationship occurs, then it is better not to draw optimistic conclusions.

If communication continues for some time or the situation involves contact (shared company, work), then expressions of a man’s sympathy for a woman will be signs of attention associated with the provision of assistance and services. There will be a pronounced desire to be directly present and take an active part in the life of the young lady with whom they sympathize. Coffee, with the right amount of sugar and milk (which is remembered from the conversation about tastes), brought during an emergency, is a more reliable sign of a man’s sympathy for a woman than many smiles and a straightened tie.

Often, when meeting a man, women are faced with the following problem: it is very difficult to determine from his behavior whether he has sympathy for his interlocutor, or whether he is showing signs of attention only out of politeness.

There are times when a man behaves rather ambiguously, and even strangely - then determining his mood becomes even more difficult. But there is good news: it is still possible to do this if you know a few secrets of the psychology of communication.

This is what the World Wide Web “says” about this....

Signs that a man is interested in you

It doesn't matter where you meet a man: in a bar, a store or at a friend's house, the fact remains that you wonder if he is really interested in you. Fortunately, determining the interest of men is not very difficult. They do not tend to be cunning or disingenuous, and they express their attitude towards women directly.
It turns out that when a man likes a woman, he subconsciously begins to send signals to her. Now the main thing is to recognize similar signals that appear in facial expressions and body language.

According to the old hackneyed legend, it is the man who takes the first step towards a relationship: he showers her with flowers and invites her to dinner. And women pretend to be hard to touch, hiding their interest. What nonsense! In fact, it is women who always make the first move and set the pace, flow and direction of a romantic relationship. It turns out that women are generally very good at deciphering body language. You just need to pay attention to the man’s gestures and movements, to his views.

The fact is that not every man feels confident in the presence of a girl, especially if he likes her. Some, due to their natural temperament, behave modestly, others cannot show their true feelings due to hidden complexes or fear of failure. If a woman can determine the nature of the doubts of the object of her sympathy and tactfully help him open up, then a generous reward awaits her: gratitude and an increased degree of trust on the part of the chosen one.

All people are different. It will be common for someone to actively try to attract the attention of the object of desire, flirt, wink. Some will be embarrassed to show their interest. But there are universal signs that are characteristic of all men.

As a rule, it is a person’s gestures that carry the greatest amount of information about a person’s mood and emotional state. Controlling your movements and gestures is not an easy task and requires special training. But even if the interlocutor makes very few movements, then his posture, posture, and head turn can speak volumes.

Let's consider the most obvious gestures of a man, indicating that he has obvious sympathy for his interlocutor.

"Passed by" signal
He passed by several times. If a man “hangs around” around a certain woman, periodically passing her for no apparent reason, this is one of the most obvious signs that he is interested in her.
A man may not look at the object of his sympathy when he is nearby - thereby he demonstrates himself, tries to arouse interest in himself and not reveal his feelings.

It is important to be especially careful here, because a man can walk past you several times and not of his own free will, but, for example, while carrying out some errand. In order to most accurately determine his intentions, it is better to play it safe and carefully watch him: does he show any other signs of attention to you.

The signal “I would have hugged you”...
If a man, while communicating with you, simultaneously spread his arms (leaning on the railing of the stairs or the back of a chair) - this is a hidden symbol of hugs.

Signal “I want to be closer”

The classic social distance is about 3.5 m or more; business from 1.5 m to 3.5 m; friendly - from 0.75 m to 1.5 m; and closer - intimate.
If the interlocutor is trying to get closer to you, it means that he wants to be closer not only in the literal sense of the word.

It's simple - the closer your man wants to be to you, the more he is attracted to you, and in the literal sense. When a person is absorbed in you, he will try to catch your fleeting glance, catch every word and smile.
If your feelings for him are mutual, smile back.

Signal "Copy Gestures"
A man's interest in a girl can manifest itself in the following way. The young man will try to engage in conversation and interest. If a man unconsciously repeats the gestures of the woman with whom he is currently talking (he also crosses his legs, tilts his head in the same direction, moves in the same rhythm), this indicates that he is tuned in to the wave of his interlocutor, and she he is deeply attracted to her.
When talking, he will quite often lean towards his companion, lower the timbre of his voice, and therefore the phrases will sound a little “intimate”.

If during a conversation a man does not hide his palms, but, on the contrary, shows them and raises them up, most likely he speaks sincerely and seeks to make you sincere.
He may also put one leg forward - this may indicate that he is taking a step towards her.

Signal "I like you"
A smile is already an excellent sign, and a sincere smile during a conversation between a man and a woman cannot but indicate mutual sympathy. An open, friendly smile is often easy to distinguish from a “tight”, insincere one, reminiscent of an animal’s grin. Take a closer look at how tense or relaxed the muscles of his face are when he smiles.
Don't be shy to show your feelings and smile back. In addition, starting a conversation with a smile will immediately endear you to your interlocutor.

More:
- If his palm turns upward when shaking hands, he is ready to obey you.

- If his two palms clasp one palm, he expresses sincerity and friendliness.

— If a man touches your hand or elbow, this is a sign of sympathy.

Signal “I want to please”
First of all, when an object of interest appears in his field of vision, a man tries to become visually taller, more toned and stately.
If a man straightens his shoulders, sticking his chest forward, stretches out, plays with his muscles, and raises his chin, this indicates his desire to impress a woman.
A man begins to preen at the sight of a woman he likes, much like animals do during mating season.

He puts himself in order “from head to toe” - suddenly he remembers that he needs to comb his hair, straighten up, suck in his stomach, and so on.
This also includes manipulations with his hair. He tries to smooth them, shakes his head or tugs at his hair, trying to create a hairstyle, the name of which translates from French as “crow’s nest.”

“Games with the wardrobe” begin: the man straightens his jacket, straightens his tie, straightens his shirt collar, or simply smoothes his clothes with his hands or shakes off specks of dust from them - these gestures indicate that the man strives to please the woman, so he begins to “clean his feathers” in order to appear in front of her in the most presentable form.
Noticing with horror that his shoes are covered with a thick layer of dust, he will try to quietly wipe them on the back of his trousers.

Adjusting a tie is a characteristic gesture for a man. But the way he does it speaks volumes about his thoughts and feelings at the moment. The tie is a phallic symbol, having an oblong shape, like the main male weapon, and its position clearly indicates the source of this similarity.

So, a man touches his tie in two cases - when he is confused and wants to give himself confidence, and when he preens himself before a decisive attack on a woman. If in the first case the gesture will be accompanied by active movement of the neck and head, then in the second the hands move more, straightening the knot of the tie, and the chest protrudes forward. In both cases, this gesture is generally intended to give the man more confidence and determination in realizing his intentions.

Signal “Hands are a magnet”
Everything we like is always attractive and interesting. I want to touch it, study it. You can understand that your partner is in a state of excitement because he is constantly trying to touch his interlocutor.
It's completely normal if you notice that the person you're talking to wants to touch you from time to time. This means he needs more of your attention. And through tactile contact it is brought even closer to you.
If you like a man, casually touch him back as a sign of reciprocity.

The degree of tactile ingratiation depends on the situation, the specifics of the couple’s relationship, the behavior of the lady herself and the man’s level of education. An inexperienced young man will seek touch timidly and ineptly. The body will constantly give it away, showing confusion, embarrassment, and sometimes even fear.

An experienced lover will begin a subtle erotic game on the verge of what is permitted, forcing his companion to respond and seek contact with his hands herself. In such a dangerous sexual game, a woman is at the mercy of her seducer from the first seconds, making it clear that she agrees to everything.

If the object of sexual desires is kept strictly and aloof, and the upbringing is quite strict, one might say puritanical, the man will not risk “attacking” too persistently, fearing a strong negative reaction, but he will still make attempts.

Signal "Metamorphoses with voice"
The carried away man is betrayed by his voice. If his “sweetheart” participates in a conversation among others, the young man’s speech changes depending on who he is addressing.
He will speak harshly and rudely to other men (possible rivals!). But when communicating with a dear friend, the timbre will change, speech will acquire melodious notes, and the voice will sound more velvety.
The reason for the metamorphosis is again rooted in the animal world: males from the wild, in the fight for a female, could even pull out each other’s feathers. The world of men is not without cruelty. And not without a healthy spirit of competition.

By the way, changes in voice sometimes betray the fair half of humanity. While focusing on charming you, she will speak at the same volume as her counterpart. If you speak quietly and measuredly, your interlocutor will not want to disturb the harmony. For the sake of maintaining the same harmony, she will support you even when you inspiredly shake the air with bass trills, tapping your fist to the beat.

Signal "I'm interested in you"
Of course, it is necessary not only to observe the gestures and facial expressions of the interlocutor, but also to listen to what he is saying, otherwise you can find yourself in a very uncomfortable position for you. You should carefully monitor the content of his speech, the meaning of his jokes, and changes in mood during the conversation.

If in a conversation a man takes the initiative into his own hands, directing the conversation, asking a lot of questions, this indicates that he is very interested in the interlocutor. On the other hand, if the conversation is exclusively business or professional topics, this may mean that the man has not yet discerned an attractive woman in his communication partner.

A man’s desire to talk only about himself and his hobbies may be a sign that he is not very interested in the woman. Sincere, open laughter in the company of a woman indicates that the man is not embarrassed to express his emotions in her presence, and this already speaks of trust.

"Pay attention" signal
Men's nature is to be constantly active. If he likes a woman, then he will try to meet her, communicate, get into her field of vision, interest her in something, and stand out from the crowd.
In no case will he neglect the attention of the object of interest; on the contrary, he will be as sympathetic and courteous as possible. A man will try to learn as much as possible about a woman, and will also talk more about himself.

A man strives to spend as much time as possible with his friend. This is a time of intimate conversations, cultural trips to various creative and entertainment locations, but does not require special “sacrifices” on the part of your partner.

“Chance meetings” are not random at all. These are clear signs that the property lacks your company and attention.

Signal “I care”
If a man is in love, he listens to the woman's opinion. Have you noticed how a man's shirt fits and you don't like it? He will never wear this shirt again.
He remembers every little thing about a woman to himself, tries to find out more about her without asking anything. Begins to be interested in what she is interested in.

Another sign of interest on the part of a representative of the stronger sex is his ability to remember any little details regarding the object of interest. Dates, events, names - everything said in passing can be carefully preserved by the male consciousness.

Signal “I change next to you”
Some men straighten their ties in your presence, others turn into clowns, starting to behave noisily and cheerfully, although in ordinary life they behave differently. Any hyper-active movement or exaggerated gesture means that he is thus showing interest in you.
What the passionate man doesn't realize is that the only thing worse than the shy guy at a party where everyone is going crazy is the shy guy who pretends to be a tough macho man and goes out of his way to pretend to be an alpha male and try to imitate Casanova or his more cheeky friends to please your beloved.

His appearance often changes. Various little things (a new suit, a bright shirt, a tie to match the shirt, neatly styled hair, a watch and fashionable perfume) may indicate that the man wanted to look his best for you. He wants (consciously or subconsciously) for you to pay attention to him.

Signal "Eyebrow Dancing"
When looking at a woman, his facial expression may also change. Shy guys often avoid looking at even the girl they like, but a confident young man, when he sees his future lover, will look at her with wide eyes and slightly raised eyebrows.
Raising eyebrows usually indicate that a person is interested in the interlocutor. But this is the case if the conversation is casual, because a serious topic of conversation can cause a concentrated or even tense expression on the interlocutor’s face.

A slightly surprised or mocking expression may indicate that he finds you attractive, but considers you a “complete fool.” In this case, a calm, firm gaze is preferable - this man finds you boring.

If during a conversation a man does not know where to put his hands - he twists a ring on his finger, fiddles with the hem of his clothes, a cufflink or a button on his jacket, we can safely conclude that he is worried. And the reason for his excitement, most likely, was the charming interlocutor.

Signal “I will always help”
Compliments, gifts, a gallant attitude and the desire to constantly help, but without fanaticism. Even if she is not in a difficult and unpleasant situation, the man will still try to make her life easier and better. He will be characterized by the desire to always be there.
Firstly, it means patronage, protection, readiness to help. Secondly, the man is subconsciously convinced that you are in his hands and will not disappear anywhere. And thirdly, this is a completely understandable hint to other men: the position is no longer vacant.

Moreover, his help can manifest itself in small things: throwing his jacket over your shoulders so that you don’t freeze, giving you his umbrella, and walking in the rain yourself.
If a girl notices a clear “excess” with attention and care, most likely the guy is extremely interested in his partner

Excessive pressure may indicate a “hunter’s instinct” and, having achieved his goal, a man will simply lose interest in his chosen one.
Another scenario: a person who demonstrates care and overprotection is inherently overly caring and persistent

Signal "I'll tear everyone up"
An equally important indicator of his interest is jealousy. Every man is a predator and earner by nature, it is in his blood. And the presence of another male in the occupied territory, even if it is a friend of his girlfriend, will give rise to unpleasant emotions in him.

He may be annoyed by other men's attention directed at a woman, looks, words and gifts.
He will not be able to tolerate his potential rivals in close proximity. He can behave assertively and even aggressively with men who pay attention to you.

A little jealousy of a man towards a woman is an indicator that the man likes the woman and that the relationship is developing in the right direction.

How can normal jealousy manifest itself? He reacts when you mention another man in his presence.

The first is that the man is somehow trying to shift the conversation from your admiring discussion of another man (naturally, who is superior to him in some way) to his successes or other topics.
Or maybe he will begin to defiantly shift the conversation to another topic, talking about an attractive mutual friend or his favorite actress.

The second is an attempt to find some shortcomings in a man whom his woman admires.

Third, he tries to remove “male friends” from a woman’s life in some way. That is, do not invite people to visit, change the schedule or route, be rude, etc.

If his woman stops admiring another man, or the man who is courting his woman disappears, male “friends” leave, then jealousy goes away. (In contrast to pathological, which never goes anywhere, regardless of time and circumstances).

It is worth noting that most of the signs indicating male attention to a particular woman are inseparable from sexual attraction. This is the nature of the stronger sex - for them, as a rule, spiritual interest goes hand in hand with physical interest. There is no need to fight this; on the contrary, you should rejoice. After all, this means that a man in love will not even look in the direction of another woman.

Signs that a man “wants” you

Any woman dreams of penetrating the thoughts and consciousness of a man, discovering all his secrets, secret desires and fantasies, and understanding his nature. Indeed, knowing what a young man wants at a given specific moment, a woman will be able to manipulate him, achieving her own goals.

A man who wants sex automatically turns into a “piece of clay” from which a woman can mold everything she needs. The problem is only one thing: how to understand when the chosen one is really sexually interested and what kind of woman he desires at the moment.

How to evaluate a man’s behavior competently if you have known each other for a long time?

In psychology, there are a lot of techniques to distinguish between lies and truth, to predict the desires and intentions of the interlocutor, to determine whether a man wants a woman and what his future plans are. Men by nature are not endowed with such powerful emotional potential, rich facial expressions and unrestrained nature as representatives of the fair half of humanity.

If physiological needs can still be somehow predicted, then in-depth studies of the subconscious are impossible. Most psychologists advise simply having a heart-to-heart talk, finding out what the man wants: sex without obligations, a serious relationship, or he sees the woman as a friend.

Direct signs of sexual interest

To understand that a man will sexually desire a woman, you should take a closer look at some behavioral points. It is easiest to “count thoughts” among emotionally open people.

For them, flirting and ambiguous jokes accompany the entire stage of flirting and verbal sexual foreplay. If the interlocutor makes “greasy” jokes, trying to focus attention on his arousal, and to please the ladies’ ears with particularly piquant compliments, then this is the beginning of a thorny path to bed. This model of behavior is inherent in sexually liberated, emotional, and mentally open individuals.

Postures that signal “I want you!”

When a man wants to satisfy his physiological needs, he can restrain himself emotionally, but the body always reveals the essence of its owner’s desires.
The master of body language interpretation, Alan Pease, in his best-selling book “Body Language. How to read the thoughts of others by their gestures” gives the following example of men expressing sympathy. The surest signs of excitement:

• Hands are in pockets, but thumbs are pointedly outstretched. When a guy takes this position, this is the surest sign that he wants his partner. Most often, these are self-confident dominants who set the tone in communication, bed, and everyday life, but such persons prefer to end their game, regardless of the opinions and feelings of others

• An even more frank gesture is when thumb tucked behind a belt or trouser waistband- don’t go to a fortune teller, you’ve “hooked” him.
• Another very eloquent gesture that focuses a woman’s attention in the area of ​​a man’s hips is hands with thumbs hooked into pockets, belt, trouser straps, etc.. In this case, the palms often lie along the inner thighs, creating a kind of viewfinder aimed at the “center of the composition.”

• But if in your presence he puts his hands completely in his pockets, and squeezes his shoulders or slouches, this indicates his emotional “stiffness.”
• It speaks of a desire to continue the conversation with a more intimate overtone. unfolded body, palms located closer to the hips, and the interlocutor himself is trying to protect his lady from the views and influence of strangers. Finding herself “captive”, the girl feels pressure and interest on an intuitive level
• Boot socks always a man involuntarily turns in a company towards the person who is the most emotionally and physically attractive at the moment. If a lady notices that the “target” is pointed at her, then there is every chance of successfully persuading a man to fulfill his fantasies and desires
• Signs that are true for both men and women - involuntary and frequent preening, constant touching of hairstyle, tie, accessories. If a man wants his interlocutor, he involuntarily wants to look as attractive as possible, which is quite natural and understandable

• When a young man begins to “get hung up” on the same status attribute(expensive cufflinks, designer tie, branded watches or fashionable glasses), most likely he is trying to demonstrate his worth to a potential partner.
  A woman must understand that this is a respectable and accomplished man, and when such a man shows signs of attention, they must be appreciated.
• If a man sits opposite a woman with his legs spread quite wide- He feels free, relaxed. This position is adopted on a subconscious level so that the woman views him as a male (showing the genital area to the female is a biological instinct in many primates)
  Many women misinterpret this pose as a sign of self-confidence and bragging, but this is not the case. This happens at the level of instincts, and you can’t go against nature.

How to understand if your partner wants sex: hidden signs

Lips are a sensual zone that attracts sexually, seduces in flirtation, and receives and gives oral caress. When a man involuntarily licks his lips, he sends the signal “I want you” to the lady with whom he is currently in contact.

• Hidden signs include constantly touching your lips with your finger. When a guy is talking to a girl he wants, he will subconsciously look at her lips while touching his mouth. This gesture is deeply subconscious, and it is almost impossible to control it.

• One of the sensual and ingratiating scenarios of flirting on the part of a man is deliberately creating a situation where he tries to touch his interlocutor's mouth. It should look natural and fleeting: brushing away a crumb, wiping away a drop of drink, an attempt to “feel you more fully.” It will not be difficult for your partner to understand that this is an open invitation to sexual relations.

• It is also quite likely that a man, when talking with a sexually attractive partner, will drive up and down the cheek with the back of the fingers, touches the ears or rubs the chin.

“I only want you”: hypersexual signs

Men who frantically want to take possession of a woman sexually demonstrate this in every possible way in everyday life and simple companionship. When a guy shields a girl from the company of other interlocutors, as if hanging over her, he involuntarily shows his emotional dependence and desire to possess the girl.

He wants to become the center of her world. This scares many ladies, but such a gesture does not carry any aggression. It’s more about persistence and the manifestation of sexual tension.

Eye contact

It is believed that women primarily look at the shoulders and arms of a potential partner, and if possible, then at the legs and buttocks. Men first evaluate the entire figure, the style of clothing and, finally, their gaze falls on the chest, then on the waist and hips.
The eyes never lie. This is true. The main thing is to correctly “read” what is written in these eyes.

In principle, the stronger sex is very talented, and can do anything with its eyes:

• Caress
• Mentally undress
• Flirt
• Trying to make people feel sorry for you (a popular technique, and often with a claim to success)
• To embarrass and deliberately “make one blush”

Be that as it may, a sexually intrigued man will make it clear that he is looking at you. Experts also call this look a floating look: his eyes look you up and down, stopping at the most interesting details of your body. Often the eyes of a man who feels sympathy for a woman linger for a long time in the area of ​​her neckline - you should not think that at this moment the man is thinking “only about one thing,” he often looks there unconsciously. However, remember that this is primarily a message: I consider you as a potential sexual partner.

A prolonged eye to eye gaze also indicates that the man has a genuine interest in the woman and is open to communicating with her. At the same time, the pupils of his eyes will dilate.
Experts say that the cause of dilated pupils is the excited state of the brain. It is believed that if you do not experience anxiety or fear, then your pupils may dilate when looking at a person you like. That is, from pleasure. Therefore, when talking face to face, keep your eyes on the eyes of your interlocutor. If his pupils suddenly begin to cover even the iris, feel free to chalk it up to your charm.
If the gaze is intent, but “cold”, a little indifferent, and the pupils remain narrow, this indicates that the man evaluates the woman, but has not yet determined for himself whether she is interesting to him or not.

You shouldn't rely 100% on eye contact, but it doesn't hurt to make it important. If you like a man, then there is no reason to avoid his gaze. Moreover, an attentive glance during a conversation indicates interest.

If your counterpart cannot take his eyes off you, then know that he is head over heels in love with you.

But don’t forget about the man’s temperament and personal characteristics; perhaps he really likes you, but by nature he is embarrassed to show his feelings and shyly looks away.

There is only one problem: if a woman is in love or is too involved in a love affair, then visual signals may be deciphered incorrectly. Simply put: sometimes we see what we want to see, and not what actually is.

A few signs that a man is in love with you

It is no secret that men and women are built completely differently, they think and act in their own way, as they say, “Men are from Mars, women are from Venus.”
The stronger sex attaches importance to visual aspects, but the fair half of humanity cares about what men say and how they say it. Sometimes we miss the banal and simple phrase “I love you.”

I don't know why it's so hard to say these words, but usually men make us feel their love in other ways. It's not that they can't talk about their feelings, I just think they don't think about them as often as women...

Often men express their feelings in very strange ways. Well, for example...

He sends stupid text messages
The more banal the text of the message, the more in love he is with you. For example, if the content of the message is something like this: “I’m drinking a Margarita” or “I just saw a cat, she looks so much like you,” there is no doubt that he is “head over heels” in love.

He constantly calls
Generally, there are 3 reasons why men use the phone:
a) for work;
b) for emergency situations;
c) to hear someone's voice. And if you are not his colleague or an employee of the rescue service, then he is only interested in you and he only wants to hear your voice.

He shares his feelings with you
He is not afraid to be himself in front of you: he is not shy to tell you that he was moved by yesterday’s film, that he had a quarrel with a friend. If a man tells you about his experiences, you mean much more to him than all the other women in the world.

He asks for your advice
“What do you think I should write in a birthday card for my brother?” “Do these boots match these pants?” - men ask these kinds of questions if they are in love and they are really interested in your opinion.

He introduces you to all your friends and buddies
If a man is truly in love and plans to build a serious relationship with you, he will definitely introduce you to his friends, acquaintances and all the acquaintances he meets by chance.

This is how he makes it clear that you are busy, that you are his woman.

He introduces you to his family
Men can date a girl for several months, but if they do not take her seriously, then they are in no hurry to introduce her to their parents and other relatives.
If he decides to get acquainted and even insists that you come to Christmas dinner, it means that his intentions are serious, and he sees you as his companion, and maybe even his wife.

You often hear from his friends that he has changed
Nobody knows your man better than his friends. If they start jokingly telling him that he has changed, stopped, or, conversely, started doing something, then this indicates that you are influencing him.

All his actions, all the changes in him are for your sake.

If a woman is important to a man, then the man is ready to change something in himself and his life, even if it is not very easy for him. If a woman is not very important for a man, then the man is not ready to change anything, but demands changes from the woman, or he is indifferent to everything.

He only looks at you
A man's eyes always give him away. A man in love can look at his chosen one for hours.

The visual perception of the surrounding world is much more important for a man than for a woman. Therefore, as soon as you are nearby, a man in love cannot help but look at you.

The man moves the relationship
Every person, regardless of his gender, wants to have his own living space, any encroachment on which will be perceived by him as an unacceptable invasion of privacy.
Women are still somewhat easier on the fact that someone may show interest in the place where they live, but men will not even tolerate the thought of such a thing.
But the psychology and behavior of a man in love changes greatly; it no longer seems strange to him that someone other than him could be on his personal territory.

How does a man in love behave? He begins to invite the girl to visit him. If you haven’t stayed overnight with him (or he with you), he makes sure that you stay the night, then maybe for the weekend, and then maybe move.
His things appear in your apartment and do not disappear anywhere, or vice versa, he leaves your things in his apartment. This already means that you are part of his life.

It's much worse if a man only needs you to please him in bed. You will be just a toy, which, as soon as he gets bored, will be completely expelled from his life.

So, what are the most basic actions and actions your partner can take that show their love for you?

• He takes care of you and fulfills all your desires.
• He always remembers what you told him.
• He began to compliment you more often, which was not the case before. (And not the other way around, a lot of compliments when meeting, and then less).
• You figure in his plans for the future, he discusses a future together with you.
• He holds your hand in crowds of people and when crossing the street.

• He unconsciously hugs you when you are in male company.
• He is always interested in what is happening in your life.
• He is always ready to help, even if he is very busy. If a man sacrifices his plans in order to take your beloved cat to the veterinarian, it means he is in love with you. It is unlikely that he would make sacrifices simply because of his selfless nature.
• He is always happy to see you and smiles when you meet.
• At times, after quarrels, he is the first to reconcile, even if he is not guilty of anything.

• You are always aware of what is happening in his life.
• He treats you with respect and never allows himself to act disparagingly towards you.
• He is ready to sacrifice his own tastes and interests to make you happy.
• Your opinion is important to him, he always discusses with you how best to act in a given situation.

• He tries to please your parents, relatives and friends.
• He tolerates communication with your relatives and girlfriends whom he does not like, and behaves quite decently.
• He can't stay angry with you for long.
• He enjoys spending time with you.
• He often calls himself, for example, when the date is over and he called and found out how you got there, or calls despite being busy and tired.

• He never forgets dates that are important to you.
• He never gets annoyed if you distract him from important matters and finds time for you, even when he is clearly busy or overloaded. (This does not mean, of course, that you need to deliberately provoke such situations. They will definitely happen without any effort on your part. Just watch).
• At parties, he never pays more attention to anyone than to you.

• He begins to communicate less often with his friends, and begins to engage in his hobbies and passions less often.
• He changes his appearance to the one you like best, pumps himself up, masters some skill that you clearly like.
• He began to cook for you, although this had not been noticed in him before. Don't forget to praise his dish, even if it turned out to be imperfect from the point of view of an experienced cook.

Of course, this is not an exhaustive list of possible changes in a man’s behavior. And it is not necessary that all changes be present. However, if a man periodically adapts and changes for you, while spending his time, making efforts and spending some money (not necessarily), then this is a good indicator that your relationship is developing in the right direction.

A word of caution. Some changes are almost impossible for a certain person. These could be bad habits (smoking), some mental characteristics (for example, a character type - melancholic). A man sometimes cannot change them, even if he wants to, and not just for your sake.

So, while communicating with the man you liked, you made several valuable comments for yourself. Let's say you noted how naturally he conducted the conversation, from which we can conclude that this person feels easy and free next to you.
But, alas, they did not notice that during the conversation he kept his arms crossed on his chest, and his gaze most often wandered around the room. Or you caught his long, dreamy gaze, considering this an unequivocal recognition, and at that moment he simply became thoughtful.

In order not to become a victim of your rich imagination and not to indulge yourself with vain illusions about the object of sympathy, you need to be patient and carefully analyze all the facts. Remember: each behavioral feature should be interpreted in conjunction with others that are no less important. Observe him in various situations, come up with several reasons for communication and topics for conversation if he does not approach you. And when you have firm confidence that he likes you, but for some reason he cannot say it directly, feel free to take the initiative into your own hands, casting aside all doubts.
Based on materials from vk.com, delaismelo.ru, www.domashniy.ru, www.saratovlady.ru, semya, www.pixy.ru, krasota-box.ru, www.wmj.ru

PS. Not all men behave this way. This list is general information. This is what the so-called reflects. average statistical norm: a pattern of behavior typical of most men. At the same time, the behavior of a particular individual may deviate significantly from the standard model.

Hello, Julia! "He calls and tries to start a conversation. Congratulates you on holidays, past and future. He jokes. And I get into a stupor and can’t talk freely”? The fact that you have sympathy is a given, but what else do you feel? It is very important to recognize, face these feelings and work through them! This is connected not only with this man, but with those who pay attention to you like a man to a woman and begin to “flirt” with you in a good way! I assume that you are embarrassed (feelings of shame) and afraid (feelings of fear) of not fitting in (appearing ridiculous, rejected, etc.)? It is very important to work through all this in a personal meeting with a psychologist in order to become aware of your unconscious patterns of behavior with a sensory layer that indicates where you have a blockage - meet it, realize it and free yourself from “everything unnecessary”! Then for you this will become a kind of enchanting dance in your relationship with the desired man. ! In reality - you don’t listen to what others say about him, even if it’s his friend, since it’s unknown what he says about you to him??? Maybe something that does not exist in nature at all, and he is simply jealous that your sympathy is given not to him, but to this man??? Therefore, do not invite third parties into your relationship who are somehow connected either with him or with you, but a psychologist is exactly the person who, from the outside, points out to you what is obvious, in fact , - was previously hidden from your eyes!!! At home, in front of the mirror - say all your feelings and state, as if he were listening to you - and meet your feelings in person, starting with the fact that “! I’m ashamed and embarrassed to tell you that I like you and what I want so that our relationship with you grows into something bigger and more significant! Like for us to get to know each other better and find common ground...etc.” You can be more frank in your manifestations, especially since this applies only to you and nothing more. And in life, become more romantic and talkative, do not be charmed in advance, do not hang expectations on a person that he does not even imagine, but approach this simply and openly, for example: “I would like to have a cup of coffee with you, like are you looking at this? And if he says “Yes,” then agree so that it suits everyone, at a time convenient for you and him, and talk, moreover, so openly without guessing and assumptions that “the other is simply obliged to read your thoughts and desires!” , talking and clarifying relationships through dialogue!!! If not, then accept it as it actually is, without making any further assumptions! And if he himself is embarrassed, then you can hear the answer later, so that he himself comes to his senses and becomes bold, for more decisive actions! Since it is unknown with what feelings he is talking to you, and maybe he feels the same for you as you do for him...? All the best. Sincerely, Lyudmila K.

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Text: Margarita TSARIK
Source: Men's magazine

Is it easy to be a gentleman if a woman mistakes your gallantry for a manifestation of tender feelings?

If I sometimes reproach certain male representatives for being unkind, this does not mean that I have never met true gentlemen in my life. On the contrary, they are the majority in my environment, and I am happy to communicate with them, receive a lot of positive emotions from this communication, as well as material for observations “from the lives of real men.”

The life of a gallant gentleman is not easy!

I'll report to you. Due to upbringing, education, the influence of the communication environment and living conditions, such a man is equally amiable with all ladies. This is how his parents raised him, this is how “he read the right books as a child”, this is how his masculine essence dictates to him in life: first “girls must not be offended”, then “girls must be protected”, and then “women must be helped”. Therefore, a true gentleman (even if “by the will of fate” he lives in the Russian outback) automatically gives ALL women his hand, helping them get out of the transport, and lets ALL women go ahead of him at the entrance/exit. Well, perhaps a true gentleman is not on duty at a bus stop to take ALL women out of transport, but he certainly will not indifferently watch how an aunt with bags, a girl in heels, a grandmother with a cane risking her life descending the slippery steps - will help. A real man does not divide women by degree of attractiveness if he needs to show gallantry. And, it would seem, what is bad or incomprehensible here? We should be glad that such men still exist. I personally am happy. But I also worry about gentlemen. Because the more gallant they are, the more complaints there are against them, and above all (you won’t believe it!) from women.

Gentlemen? Oh, these are terrible people!

What did the “kind men” do wrong in front of women? What are they doing wrong? Oh, these are terrible people! With their gallant behavior, they involuntarily plant unjustified hopes in women's hearts. If a girl is not spoiled by male attention, then in any manifestation of basic good manners on the part of a man, she seems to feel a special favor: here they are leaving together from mutual friends, he hands her a coat, then opens the door for her, then helps her cross a puddle, then politely asks: “Do you need a ride? No? Well, then all the best, it was nice to meet you,” he smiles sweetly and leaves. And she remains - enchanted and already in love, and all in the illusion that this is mutual, that he likes her, because he looked after her SO. In fact, he would do the same for ANY woman, but she thinks that only for HER. A mature woman is no better in this sense - she can turn out to be just as much a dreamer as a naive girl, if she yearns for male attention, she will also tremble at manifestations of ordinary politeness and wait for continuation. And when he doesn’t wait, he will be offended and once again declare that “all men are bastards.”

“Come in, come in, it’s blowing here!”

Remember how in the film “Cinderella” Ranevskaya, in the role of the Stepmother, counts: “The king said “come in, come in, it’s blowing here” - 2 times... Total: 10 signs of attention.” Nothing escapes the tenacious female observation; all manifestations of care, politeness, gallantry are recorded, summed up, calculated, and then freely interpreted. They can mean anything that comes into a woman’s head, and this, you know, is a whole universe of fantasies and illusions. To convince you, here is not a fairy-tale example, but a real-life example. And also about “it blows here.”

My friend is a wonderful family man, a faithful husband, a reliable friend, a fair boss - very close to the ideal, including being impeccably polite. This golden man and his subordinates are going to celebrate a corporate anniversary in the lap of nature. The team is predominantly female, everyone needs to be looked after so that they don’t get lost in the forest, don’t get drunk, or drown. And so he was like a father to all his colleagues, and one girl had to pay even more attention, because she was lightly dressed, and in the evening it became cool. And what does a real gentleman do? That's right, he takes off his jumper and carefully puts it over the girl's shoulders. That's all! She imagined that this was a sign of special affection, that then everything would be beautiful and frantic: wild sex and declarations of love, and then they would get married. And he waits for all of the above, but it doesn’t happen, because the gallant gentleman is not aware of her script, and for him she is no different from other employees who just need to be looked after.

She resolutely took off her thrown jacket

Workdays begin, our fair boss notices with surprise that the subordinate girl does not talk to him. She silently brought the ill-fated jumper into his office, threw it in his face and proudly retired to her workplace. And again he doesn’t talk, including on work matters. The gallant boss forcibly extracted an explanation from the entertainer, listened to a lot of complaints and sobs, barely managed to restore the status quo in their collegial relations through incredible diplomatic efforts, and swore off participating in informal meetings of the company’s employees. Can you imagine what could have happened if our wonderful man had at least kissed this unbalanced girl with a rich imagination? It's scary to think about.

Red rose - emblem of love

Another friend of mine, no less beautiful and no less well-mannered, found himself in a similar situation due to his unusual habit of giving flowers to all women. Well, this is how he perceives reality: a woman is automatically a flower. I think this “bad” habit of his has deprived many women of sleep and peace, because he is a mega-charismatic and hyper-charming man, and even with such manners... mmmmm... that’s something! One of his friends, a lady of Balzac’s age, asked him to meet her at the airport. Our gallant gentleman, of course, could not refuse such an insignificant service and did not even inquire - maybe the lady does not know that a taxi service exists? No, such questions are unworthy of a real man - he met you, handed you a rose, kissed the hand, helped you carry your luggage, put you in the car, took you home, took you out of the car, helped you carry your luggage, kissed the hand, said goodbye, and left. He left the woman in bewilderment and disheveled feelings. Since then, this luxurious, but slightly overripe lady has been stalking him in earnest - bombarding him with tender text messages, offers to meet, requests for help and claims “why have you lost interest in me?” Well, it’s clear - she has her last passion, her last love, “an autumn kiss after a hot summer.” And the man is all in alarm - his wife chuckled at first, now she is angry, suspects that he really seduced the lady and abandoned her. But he seriously doesn’t understand - what provoked such a sultry attack from a decent adult woman? It's all because of the red rose - the emblem of love. The man gave it mechanically and without subtext. For him, this is as reflexive as handing a woman a coat or a lighter. And for the lady, this scarlet rose, coupled with a kiss on the hand, looked like an invitation to jump in tandem into the abyss of fatal passions. Again, the female imagination has no boundaries and no limiting factors.

Hostages of their own gallantry

A man can become a hostage to his own gallantry, if a woman takes it for manifestations of partiality towards her specifically. But women's fantasies and pretensions are not all the troubles that befall a true gentleman. After all, fantasy women also have jealous husbands and boyfriends, and they also have a rich imagination - such a jealous man can easily imagine the threat of branchy horns if a pleasant stranger shows ordinary manners towards his lady. So, if you open the door politely for a woman, you will already be challenged to a duel out of jealousy. And then this also happens - a well-mannered man, seeing that a lady is being offended, stands up for her and pulls the offender away. And the lady, in turn, attacks the defender: “Don’t touch my man!” I have heard such stories many times.

So what should long-suffering true gentlemen do? Walk cowardly by when a woman is insulted? Should you not shake hands if a lady slips? Don't give up your seat to grandma on the tram?

No, please remain gentlemen always! Believe me, we appreciate your gallantry and understand how difficult it is for you to carry the title of “real man” through life. But who, if not you?