Psychological training for parents: The joy of education. "training exercises with parents"

Training exercises for working with parents and students

A special place in my pedagogical activity is occupied by parent training. The training is conducted with a group of parents at a parent-teacher meeting. Trainings will be effective if all parents become actively involved in them and attend regularly. In order for the training to have a final positive result, it must include 5-8 sessions. During the training sessions, with great interest, parents perform such tasks as “children's grimaces”, “favorite toy”, “my fairy-tale image”, “children's games”, “memories of childhood”, “film about my family”. Such tasks allow you to take a fresh look at relationships in your family, at your own authority in the eyes of the child.

I would like to bring to your attention several game exercises that are aimed at forming a parent team. They can be used at the first parent-teacher meeting, or at several meetings with parents.

Greetings.

All participants greet each other in a circle in different ways:

Say amicably to each other “Hi!;

Bang fists;

Rub your backs;

We hug.

The exercise helps the participants to get to know and quickly remember each other's names. Participants of the training sit in a common circle. The first participant introduces himself and names something he likes. This noun must start with the same letter as the name of this participant. For example, a participant named Anton might say: "My name is Anton and I love oranges." The second participant repeats what the first participant said and adds information about himself. For example: "This is Anton, who loves oranges, and I'm Tatyana and I love dancing."

paper napkins

The exercise helps the participants of the training to get to know each other, and also creates a cheerful positive atmosphere in the group. The participants of the training are given a pack of paper napkins in a circle with the words: “In case you need it, please take some napkins for yourself.” After all participants have taken napkins, they are invited to tell as many of the happiest events from the life of their family as they have napkins in their hands.

How similar we are!

The exercise helps the participants to get to know each other better. You need to split into two groups. Let each group make a list of what unites its members. In this list, you can write, for example: “We each have a sister…”, “We each have a soft toy…”, “The favorite color of each of us is red…”. You can not write universal information, such as "I have two legs." You can specify, for example, the year of birth, place of study, hobbies, marital status, etc. You have 8 minutes. The group that finds and writes down the most similarities wins.

"It seems to me that as a child you were (a) ..."

Participants throw the ball to each other with the words: "It seems to me that as a child you were (a) ...". In response, everyone can agree or refute the statement. The second option: "I think as a child you dreamed (a) ...". Here, the participants of the training can talk about themselves, what they dreamed about in childhood or what they were then. This exercise encourages group members to fall into a childish ego state.

“Draw the coat of arms of the family

Participants must create the coat of arms of their family. The coat of arms should be beautifully designed. For a hint, I used a fragment of a previously filmed film “My family through the eyes of a child” (see video attachment)

Game "Wonderful bag"

I have a bag in my hands, at the bottom of which there are a wide variety of positive and negative feelings that a person can experience. After your child crossed the school threshold, feelings and emotions settled firmly in your soul, in your heart, which filled your entire existence. Put your hand in the bag and take the "feeling" that has overwhelmed you the most for a long period of time, name it. Parents name the feelings that they are painfully experiencing. This activity allows you to identify problems and difficulties that arise in the family, and discuss these problems in the course of considering the topic of the meeting.

Game "Spider Web"

Who wants to be like a child? (preferably dad) Here's our baby. One of the forms of parental attention, care and love are restrictions and prohibitions. Today, we will translate every ban that is presented into a physical one and show it on our child. We will literally bind him with obligations and prohibitions. I made red ribbons. Let's name what is usually forbidden to the child (parents name the prohibitions, and the teacher ties the "child" with ribbons)

Exercise "Fertile garden".

There is a poster on the board with a picture of a tree. Participants are given apples (green - positive emotions and red - negative emotions), on which everyone writes the answer to the question: What do you think about our last meeting?

Then apples are hung on a tree with a commentary on what the participants liked or did not like and wishes for the future.

Thank you for your attention and participation in our meeting today.

BIBLIOGRAPHY

Beskorovaynaya L. S., Perekatyeva O. V. "Desk book of a primary school teacher." Ed. 3rd - Rostov n / D: publishing house "Phoenix", 2004. - 352p. (Series "School of joy".)

Derekleeva N. I. "Parent meetings in grades 1-11." - M.: Verbum-M, 2001. - 80s.

Derekleeva N. I. “Handbook of the class teacher. Primary School. 1-4 classes. M.: Wako, 2003. - 240p.

Salyakhova L. I. “Parents' Meetings. Scenarios, recommendations, materials for conducting. 1-4 classes. - M.: Globus, 2007. - 315 p. - (Class leadership).

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Training of harmonious parent-child relationships

The purpose of psychological correction:

change in the inadequacy of parental positions,

harmonization of parenting style,

Expanding awareness of the motives of upbringing in the family,

· optimization of forms of parental influence in the process of raising children.

Program objectives:

a) psychological education - to give parents knowledge about the mechanisms of family systems, to show the influence of their parental families on the current situation in their own family;

b) training - to give a specific model for building relationships with children and to teach parents the various interpersonal skills necessary to implement this model;

c) reorientation - self-examination of parental positions, development of a multidimensional psychological vision of child-parent and other interpersonal relationships, overcoming stereotypes, rigid patterns of behavior.

Conceptual basis: the idea of ​​cooperation between an adult and a child. The program used the ideas of T. Gordon, K. Rogers, A. Adler, R. Dreikurs, R. Bern, as well as the experience of St. Petersburg psychologists, employees of the Training Institute N. Yu. Khryashcheva, E. Sidorenko and others.

Organizational principles:

a) Grouping. A typical member of the group is a person who belongs to the category of people with an average income and has at least completed secondary education. It is contraindicated to include parents with psychotic personality disorders in groups. The group usually consists of six to eight parents. The best option is one in which the group includes only individual parents or only married couples. This allows you to adjust the training methods in accordance with the specifics of the group, which significantly increases the efficiency of the work. The emerging sense of the group and group cohesion are important characteristics of the process of parental psychocorrection, therefore, after the second session, the group closes and no new members join it.

b) Time frame. The total amount of time required to achieve a tangible result is about 35 hours of work. Parents meet for 3-4 hours every week for ten weeks. This mode of work allows you to put into practice the acquired knowledge and correct them in the process of discussion in subsequent classes.

Main steps:

Preparatory (motivational)- is a group consultation for parents based on the results of diagnosing deformations of parent-child relationships. Acquaintance with the results of diagnostics and their psychological interpretation creates the motivation necessary for effective completion of the training.

Main (working)- the structure of the sessions is planned in accordance with the accepted rules for conducting socio-psychological training.

final- the last session is held in the form of a “family holiday”, in which all interested family members take part.

Control and fixing– it is practiced to hold additional meetings of the training participants in order to observe and consolidate the positive changes in the cognitive, emotional and behavioral spheres.

Lesson 1. Parental attitudes and styles of interaction with children.

Target:

familiarization of participants with each other and with the rules of group work;

awareness of parental attitudes, their differentiation into "interfering" and "helping" in the process of interaction with the child;

learn to distinguish between the ego states of Parent, Adult and Child.

Introduction to training as a special form of education. The psychologist invites the parents to take seats on the chairs arranged in a circle, addresses them with an introductory speech about the peculiarities of the work of the training groups, group rules and rituals. In addition to the traditional rules that implement the principles of activity, voluntariness, confidentiality, respect for the speaker, etc., we practice addressing participants to each other and to the psychologist on "you", mandatory telephone and personal communication between participants between classes, tea drinking during breaks and etc.

Getting the participants to know each other. At this stage, it is possible to use one or all of the proposed exercises.

Exercise 1 "Self-presentation". Participants are given cards and pencils for the design of "business cards". After some time (5-7 minutes), you need to present your "business card", tell briefly about yourself, about your expectations and fears associated with the training.

Exercise 2 Warm-up game. The leader goes to the center of the circle, his chair is removed. Naming the sign, the owners of which should change places, the leader aims to take the place of one of the participants. For example, it is necessary to change places for those who have a son. While the fathers and mothers of the sons change places, the host tries to take the place of one of them. The remaining participant becomes the leader. Usually the game is very fun, helps to relieve tension, create a favorable psychological atmosphere.

Exercise 3 "The child in us." Throwing the ball, the participants turn to each other with the phrase: "It seems to me that in childhood you were (a) ...". In response, everyone can agree or not with the characteristic given to him. This exercise helps the participants to get to know each other more deeply, in addition, it helps to activate the children's ego-state of the parents, which creates the basis for further psycho-corrective work.

Understanding parenting. The psychologist's story about the essence of the concept of a psychological attitude and its influence on the perception of reality should be as simple and illustrative as possible. Here it is possible to use exercises that allow parents to feel the influence of the attitude on the example of perceptual-cognitive processes. The main thesis of this stage, which parents can be asked to write down, is the following: “Our relationship with children is influenced by the attitudes formed in childhood by our parents, regardless of our desire - until we are aware of them. If the mindset is conscious, it ceases to rule us, we can change it.”

Exercise 4 "Parental settings". Participants are asked to close their eyes, take a few deep breaths and slow, smooth exhalations - and, against the backdrop of a relaxed state, remember their parental family, their childhood. How did your parents react to your pranks, whims, misconduct? How would they complete the following sentences: “Children misbehave because...”, “Naughty child is...”, “Parents should...”? Then, after coming out of the state of relaxation, participants share their experiences and thoughts about parental attitudes. In the course of the discussion, it is necessary to differentiate the current attitudes into “helping”, i.e. rational, effective - and "interfering", i.e. irrational, ineffective in the sphere of parent-child relationships.

Positions in communication: Parent, Adult and Child. The theme of parental attitudes is logically continued by the consideration of rigid positions in communication within the framework of the concept of E. Berne. The main thesis of this thematic block is: “The position of an adult contributes to the manifestation of an adult position in another person. The position of the Parent determines the position of the other child and vice versa. The parent's stay in the Adult ego-state gives the child the opportunity to feel psychological equality with the mother or father, helps to master the rules of logic and common sense. If time permits, it is possible to experiment with different ego-states according to the method of E. Sidorenko.

Summing up the lesson. It is very important to take this stage slowly in order to enable parents to realize and verbalize their new experience gained during the lesson, to receive support from a psychologist and other participants. Everyone is invited to answer three questions: "What do I feel?", "What am I thinking about?", "What do I want to do?". We practice at the end of each session providing support to one of the participants according to the principle of the Gestalt "hot chair".

Homework.

1) Parents are invited to write an essay "My child" for the purpose of subsequent discussion in the group. No additional instructions regarding the content, form or length of the essay are given.

2) Parents and children depict a family, designating its members in the form of circles so that the drawing schematically reflects the system of their relationships. Comparison of ideas about the family structure of its various members provides rich material for reflection and the search for effective forms of interaction.

3) Describe several situations of interaction with your child from different positions.

Lesson 2. Basic psychological goals of children's behavior.

Target:

familiarity with the concept of Adler-Dreikurs about the "erroneous goals" of behavior;

teaching active listening skills;

awareness of ineffective response patterns in a situation where the child is pursuing a “wrong goal”.

Discussion of homework. Parents read out their essays, while the psychologist and participants note the general emotional tone of the narration, characteristic phrases that reflect the attitude of the parent to the child, etc. Often at this stage, there is a need for psychological support for parents, the forms of which the psychologist chooses in accordance with the techniques that he owns.

The second part of the homework is analyzed in accordance with the Family Sociogram methodology. After discussing the obtained children's and parent's schematic representations of the family system, parents can be invited to draw up an "ideal" diagram for their family.

Acceptance of the child's feelings. One of the motives for the work of parents in the training group is the desire for mutual understanding with their child. To understand a child means to hear his feelings, to penetrate into the deep motivation of his behavior. The necessary skill here is the skill of "active listening", the development of which is dedicated to this stage of the lesson.

Exercise 1. "Monument to feeling." This is a variant of the famous Sculptor technique, which is both a warm-up exercise and a good introduction to the topic. Parents work in pairs, one plays the role of "clay", the other - "sculptor". "Sculptors" receive cards with the names of feelings, emotional states, "monuments" to which they must "blind" without words, using the partner's body. At the discussion stage, we invite parents to answer two additional questions: 1) when do you experience this feeling in relation to your child? 2) when do you think the child experiences it in relation to you?

The psychologist's story about the psychological mechanisms of "suppression" of feelings and compensation is compiled in accordance with the educational level of the participants in the training. His main thesis may be as follows: “Emotions that are suppressed are preserved. Feelings that are allowed and acknowledged lose their destructive essence. Naming and acknowledging repressed emotions brings a child great relief, joy, a sense of closeness with parents, the consciousness that you are heard and understood.

Exercise 2. "Acceptance of feelings." Participants are divided into micro-groups of 4-5 people, each of which is given the task of reformulating ineffective parental responses so that the feelings of the child are accepted. Here are sample questions and possible answers:

"Don't you dare hit him! It's your brother!" (“You can be angry with your brother, but you can’t beat him.”)

"Don't be afraid. The dog won't touch you." ("Cute dog... But if you're afraid, let's go to the other side").

"Smile. It's not as bad as you think" ("I would be upset too. But maybe we can find a way out together?").

“Think - a shot! Even the baby is not afraid, but you ... ”(“ Yes, the injection hurts. If you are afraid, you can take my hand. ”)

In the process of discussing this exercise, parents get acquainted with the concept of "active listening", the author of which is T. Gordon, an American psychologist. Listening actively means picking up on what your child is really trying to tell you, how they really feel, and voicing those feelings in your own words, coloring your statements with understanding and genuine concern (another term to describe this phenomenon is “empathy”) . The skill of active listening cannot be developed in one exercise, in one lesson. Therefore, it is necessary to return to this topic throughout the course.

Basic psychological goals of children's behavior. At this stage, parents are introduced to the Adler-Dreikurs concept of erroneous ways to achieve basic psychological goals. This acquaintance occurs during the role-playing game.

Exercise 3. Role-playing game "Achieving basic goals." The psychologist plays the role of a child trying to achieve recognition, influence, security, and autonomy in inefficient ways (demanding attention, power struggles, revenge, avoidance). The task of the parent is to build interaction with the child. When analyzing the exercise, special attention is paid to the feelings of the parents, which are an "indicator" of the child's erroneous goals.

Homework.

1) “Do we know our children?” - parents are offered questions to determine the degree of their awareness in various areas of interests and preferences of the child. When answering questions, parents fill out a table where they are responsible for themselves and for the child, leaving room for the child's real answer, which they will receive at home. Here is a sample list of questions for younger students and their parents:

My favorite animal and why. My least favorite animal and why.

My favorite color and why. My least favorite color and why.

My favorite fairy tale. A story that I don't like.

In another person, I like this feature most of all, like ...., but I don’t like ...

If I had a fantastic opportunity to become someone for one day, then I would become ... Why?

I would ask a good wizard about ... And I would ask an evil wizard about ... Why?

What kind of animals would a magician turn me and my family members into. Why?

2) In parental diaries, note situations in which the child is trying to achieve a “mistaken goal”, describing his feelings and actions in this case.

Lesson 3. How we raise our children.

Target:

acquaintance with the content and conditions for a favorable passage of the main stages of personality formation;

awareness of their non-verbal and verbal manifestations of the ego-state "Pig parent"

Discussion of homework. "Do we know our children?" Parents talk about the answers they received at home to homework questions. Here it is important that the group members talk about themselves, find something in common that unites them and the children. The psychologist, by conducting simple statistics, can emphasize which animals, fairy tales, desires, etc. called most often in the group.

Psychological workout. Because the content of this lesson assumes a certain degree of immersion in psychotraumatic situations of childhood, it becomes necessary to study the topic of resistance to new personal experience. Therefore, the warm-up exercise is selected and interpreted in accordance with this task.

Exercise 1. "Trust". The psychologist asks the participants to determine the degree of their trust in each other: “To what extent can we open up, trust each other and new experience?”. One of the participants stands on a platform (this can be a stable chair or table), from which he has to fall with his eyes closed into the hands of the others. Exercise usually causes strong emotional reactions. Therefore, the main thing here is to correctly analyze feelings.

Here is the approximate content of this conversation: “Deep work on oneself, one's personality is always associated with the inclusion of resistance mechanisms. This can be expressed in actions: in the desire to change the topic of conversation, leave the room, go to the toilet, be late, look away, in the desire to eat, smoke, stop communicating. Or even get sick... Resistance can manifest itself in some beliefs, such as: "This won't suit me", "I don't believe in this." We continue to resist when we say to ourselves, “They won’t let me change,” “It’s their fault,” and so on. And the biggest resistance is the fear of the unknown: “I’m not ready,” “I don’t want to talk about it,” “I don’t trust anyone.” If you catch yourself in such thoughts or actions - very good! You noticed your resistance, realized it. Don't scold yourself. Instead, tell yourself, “What makes me resist? Where do I get this feeling from? Where is it in the body? After answering these questions, try to relax - and thank your resistance for doing something important for you, protecting and protecting you, and then - ask it to help you change, achieve your goal.

The main stages in the development of a child's personality. The psychologist's lecture solves the problem of psychological education of parents, providing them with information about the content of the stages of personality development according to E. Erickson, the necessary conditions for their favorable passage. It is possible to expand this topic by talking about the intrauterine development of the fetus, basal perinatal matrices (according to St. Grof), and other psychological information. It is necessary to present this information with maximum correctness, taking into account the level of personal development and the current state of the parents.

Group discussion: "What conclusions does this information allow parents to draw?" Often the first reaction of parents is a feeling of helplessness, the realization of mistakes made that are very difficult to correct. It is important to organize the discussion in such a way that from frustration to come to a positive perception of the prospects for interaction with the child, an awareness of the resources that have made it possible to educate him so far with some success.

Exercise 2. "Detronation". This exercise is called A. Adler's term, denoting the process of changing the intrapersonal and external situation in connection with the birth of a second child in the family. The role-playing game, in which the psychologist demonstrates psycho-traumatic statements that exacerbate the process of "detronation" of the older child, allows you to penetrate into the world of his experiences, to understand the causes of many problems in the relationship of children. In the process of discussion, parents develop rules for preventing children's rivalry.

Awareness of parental positions and style of interaction with the child. Returning to the theme of the positions of the Parent, Adult and Child in interpersonal relationships, in this lesson we consider the concept of K. Steiner about the ego-state "Pig parent". Awareness of one's own reactions emanating from this state is facilitated by the following exercise, the idea of ​​which we took from E. Sidorenko.

Exercise 3. "Pig parent." Parents are invited to use the verbal and non-verbal reactions given to them on the cards in an impromptu appeal to an imaginary child. Here is the contents of the cards:

1) forehead wrinkles;

2) extended finger;

3) shaking the head;

4) "terrifying" look;

5) trampling with the foot;

6) hands on chest;

7) sigh;

8) "I would never in my life...";

9) "If I were (a) in your place...";

10) "Did you dare?!"

11) "So what? .."

The tasks are selected in such a way that their positional content can be interpreted both in an authoritarian and equal context. For example, wrinkles on the forehead can be located both vertically (anger, thoughtfulness) and horizontally (surprise, delight). Which context we choose more often indicates our rigid parental attitudes. In our classes, the vast majority of parents "choose" an authoritarian context, i.e. show the position of "Pig parent". A collision with an unsightly self is frustrating, depressing, and activates defense mechanisms. Art therapy techniques help to overcome this condition, one of the options which are described below.

Exercise 4 Microgroups consisting of 3-4 people receive sheets of paper, paints - and the task to depict "Pig" without talking to each other. After discussing the received drawings, it is necessary to transform them so that the “Pig” loses its strength and power.

The psychologist talks about the ways in which our inner "Pig" interferes with our harmonious relationship with the child: negative motivation (when we make children feel bad about themselves); overprotection (when we do too much for children, we solve their problems instead of them); increased demands; disrespect; permissiveness, the absence of clear boundaries of permissible behavior.

Summing up the lesson. "Support".

Homework.

1) Discuss with the children the topic of punishment: what is the most “terrible” punishment for them, whether they were punished unfairly, whether they will punish their children, etc.

2) Practice communicating with the child from the position of an Adult.

Lesson 4. Problems of discipline.

Target:

awareness of the psycho-traumatic impact of physical and emotional abuse on the formation of the child's personality;

training in the skill of applying the principles of logical consequences, providing a choice to establish the boundaries of permissible behavior.

Discussion of the current state, psychological warm-up. The cognitive and emotional experience received by parents in previous classes often causes negative emotional and self-esteem processes. To prevent and correct such effects, both constant support from the psychologist and group members and targeted exercises are needed to keep parents in a resourceful state.

Exercise 1. "I am a good parent." Each participant is offered within

1 minute to talk about your strong "parental" sides. After each performance, the other participants non-verbally express their support for the narrator (it can be a handshake, a friendly pat on the shoulder, an approving nod of the head, etc.).

Group discussion based on homework results. Discussion of homework in this lesson takes place after the warm-up, because. it is directly related to the topic of further work.

Why we are against suppressive punishments.

Exercise 2. "Punishment." Against the backdrop of relaxation, parents are invited to recall the situation when they were punished by their parents. You need to get answers to the following questions for yourself: “What did you feel then?; What were your bodily sensations?; What were you thinking then?; What did you want to do? The discussion of this exercise often makes it superfluous to provide any additional information about the negative effects of punishment.

Providing freedom of choice and logical consequences. The most effective method of communicating with children, according to experts, is to provide them with freedom of choice in all situations where this is objectively possible, and the opportunity to experience the consequences of their chosen course of action.

Exercise 3. "Discipline". Each participant briefly describes on a card a situation typical for his family when any disciplinary measures are needed in relation to a child. These cards are shuffled, parents are distributed in pairs. Each pair draws a card for themselves describing the situation to be solved by providing choices and logical consequences. Then there is a group discussion of the solutions found.

Establish boundaries for acceptable behavior. Giving freedom of choice and logical consequences are not the only methods of establishing the necessary discipline. We invite parents to get acquainted with the "graded system of establishing a ban" according to the method of H. Ginott:

1. Recognize that a certain desire may well arise in a child (“I understand that you want ...”)

2. Clearly define a ban on any action (“But I can’t let you do it now, because”)

3. Indicate how the child can fulfill his desire.

4. Help the child express their legitimate dissatisfaction ("Of course you don't like it...")

Exercise 4. Role-playing game "Discipline". The development of the ability to apply in practice new methods for solving problems of discipline takes place in a role-playing game. The topics of task situations can be proposed both by the psychologist and by the participants themselves.

Summing up the lesson. "Support".

Homework.

1) Rejection of suppressive punishments. Application of new principles of establishing discipline.

2) Invite the children to finish the story about the chick that fell out of the nest (projective test by B. Shelby, the text of which is given by Nikolskaya and Granovskaya).

Lesson 5. Increasing the self-esteem of children.

Target:

familiarity with the concept of effective and ineffective approval, the concept of informal communication;

teaching support skills, strengthening active listening skills;

awareness of the role of the child in the family structure.

Discussion of homework. When analyzing children's stories about a chick that fell out of the nest, attention is drawn to verbs that often reflect typical response strategies in a dangerous, traumatic situation. It is interesting to compare these strategies in children and their parents. The effectiveness of these strategies largely depends on the level of self-esteem of the individual.

Psychological workout. As a warm-up for this lesson, any psycho-gymnastic exercise that promotes positive self-perception is suitable. We offer only one of many possible options.

Exercise 1. "Holiday of boasters." Within a minute, you need to name as many positive effects for the group as possible from your participation in its work. The competitive context of this exercise allows parents to be liberated, creatively approach the search for all their new contributions to the group process. Thus, the field for understanding the role of the child in creating and maintaining a family atmosphere is revealed.

Ways to increase the self-esteem of children. Our feedback and non-verbal communication helps kids feel good about themselves—or feel like failures. Children instinctively feel when parents believe in their abilities and talents, trust and respect their self-esteem, when even children's mistakes do not frighten or upset parents, because regarded as a necessary life experience.

Exercise 2. Brainstorming. Parents are faced with the task of finding as many different ways as possible to believe in the strength of the child himself and let him feel it. The most unrealistic, non-standard decisions are made. It is important to stimulate creativity, the ability to look at the problem and your child in a new way.

In addition to the methods found by parents as a result of brainstorming, the psychologist offers to get acquainted with the concepts of informal communication, support, and family advice.

Exercise 3. "Informal communication." The group is divided into "parents" and "children". "Children" go out the door, each comes up with a problem that he would like to address to the "parent". "Parents" are instructed not to respond to the child's requests under the pretext of being busy, tired, etc. Within a few minutes there is a role-playing of situations. Then the participants switch roles. However, new "parents" receive the opposite instruction: to respond to the child's words with maximum attention, responsiveness, to offer their help and support. The discussion of the feelings of the participants ends with the definition of the concepts of formal (closed, indifferent, insincere) and informal (open, empathic, sincere) communication.

An important parenting skill is effective approval or support. If praise is aimed at assessing a person’s personality, making this assessment directly dependent on performance results and thereby reducing self-esteem in case of failures, then support is aimed at recognizing intermediate results and personal contribution to their achievement, thereby contributing to an increase in self-esteem of a child and an adult.

Exercise 4. "Praise and support." Parents work in pairs. Within 5-7 minutes, each pair needs to come up with examples according to the following scheme:

Situation - Praise - Support.

Summing up the lesson. "Support".

Homework.

1) Application in practice of informal communication, support.

2) Holding a family council about plans for the day off.

3) Make a list of problems in the relationship with the child.

Lesson 6. Reorientation of control.

Target:

awareness of the ineffective self-responsibility of parents;

Teaching children how to take responsibility for their own lives.

Discussion of homework. Parents share their successes and educational "finds" in the field of increasing the self-esteem of children.

Psychological workout. As warm-up exercises, it is important to offer such exercises that contribute to group cohesion, the removal of communication barriers between participants.

Exercise 1. "Stress Relief". Parents are invited to close their eyes and identify those parts of the body that are currently most tense. Then, in pairs, parents help each other with gentle massage movements to relieve tension. Here it is appropriate to talk about the importance of physical contact for a favorable relationship.

Ineffective self-obligation. These are irrational judgments that limit our freedom and form rigid parental attitudes. It is difficult for many parents to transfer responsibility for their life to a child because they strive to be good parents, meaning by this something like this:

I have to see to it that my child develops normally and behaves in a certain way.

I am obliged to lead my child, and he - to follow my instructions.

I have to take care of the child. In the end, it's not his fault that he was born.

If my child gets into trouble, I have to get him out of this trouble.

I must sacrifice everything for him, for his needs are more important than mine.

I must be alert to all dangerous situations and protect the child from them, ensuring his safety.

It is my duty to protect my child from suffering, troubles, mistakes and failures.

Exercise 2. "Must - or want?". Replace the words “should”, “must” in the above statements with “want”. What feelings arise when you say these phrases?

Exercise 3. "Bunch of duties." One parent is asked if he or she can walk along a line marked on the floor. Then they give him boxes in his hands, symbolizing all sorts of duties that the parent "should" perform. With a bunch of these "duties" to go through the line is already much more difficult. Interpreting this allegory, parents come to the conclusion that the excessive workload of responsibilities towards the child does not allow them to see prospects, “noises” the educational strategy, depriving it of integrity and harmony.

The only real defense of a child against dangers is his common sense and the knowledge that only he himself must recognize these dangers and make appropriate decisions in relation to them.

Problem sorting. This principle of solving the problems of parent-child relationships was proposed by T. Gordon. It consists in the fact that problems are divided into two groups depending on whose life - a parent or a child - they directly affect.

Transfer of responsibility to the child. When transferring responsibility to a child for solving problems that directly affect his life, the following 10 conditions must be met:

1. Calm environment. Readiness for dialogue on both sides.

2. Do not engage in any business along the way, do not speak half-turned.

3. Prepare a statement in advance.

4. Eliminate assessments (“you behave badly”, “lazy”) and generalizations (“never”, “always”, “forever”) from it.

5. Talk about specific actions.

6. Talk about your feelings, thoughts, desires, using “I” more often than “you”.

7. Assure the child of your friendly participation in his affairs.

8. Do not turn everything into a boring, long notation.

9. Monitor the child's reaction.

10. Finish with friendly physical contact (hug, kiss, pat on the shoulder, etc.).

Exercise 4. "Transfer of control." Parents compose statements to transfer responsibility to their child for solving one of the urgent, but not too painful problems.

Summing up the lesson. "Support".

Homework.

1) The use of "I-statements" in communication with children and adults.

2) Draw up an "Education Program", defining its long-term and short-term goals and specific ways to achieve them.

3) Ask the child to draw a family doing their favorite activity

Lesson 7. Personal rights of the parent.

Target:

familiarity with the concept of psychological rights of the individual;

awareness of the need to establish equal relationships with the child;

mastering the skill of using "I-statements" to solve problems directly related to the life of a parent.

Discussion of homework. The analysis of children's drawings is carried out by a psychologist using the "Kinetic Family Drawing" method. However, it is much more effective from the point of view of the objectives of the training to discuss the parent's subjective experiences in connection with the child's drawing, the perception of this drawing by other participants.

Psychological workout. As a warm-up for this lesson, an exercise from body-oriented therapy is used, which allows you to feel at the bodily level the need for an equitable load ratio to build harmonious interpersonal relationships.

Exercise 1. "Pair squat." Parents work in pairs: you need to stand with your back to each other, leaning on your partner so that both one and the other are comfortable enough. Then, without the help of hands, the couples must sit down and stand up, which can only be done if the load is evenly distributed between the participants in the interaction.

Awareness of the degree of equality in actual relationships with the child.

Exercise 2. Who do I care about? It is necessary to make a list of people that each participant cares about at this stage of their life. As a rule, people forget to put themselves on this list, which is what this exercise is designed to focus on.

Exercise 3. "Scales of duties." It is proposed to draw up two lists: the first - "My duties towards the child"; the second is "The duties of the child towards me." Comparison, "weighing" of these lists gives rise to a discussion of the degree of fairness of the current situation.

Parental self-care is a necessary condition for a harmonious relationship with the child.

Exercise 4. Brainstorming. The group is divided into two teams, each of which must, within a certain time, give as many arguments as possible in favor of the thesis: "Taking care of ourselves, we take care of our family."

Exercise 5: Take care of your inner child. This exercise in the technique of psychosynthesis is carried out against the background of a relaxed state and is aimed at integrating the "Frustrated Child" ego-state.

Ways to take care of yourself.

Exercise 6. Avalanche. This exercise is described in the book by F. Zimbardo: “Imagine that your house is covered with snow during the weekend, you can neither get out, nor contact anyone, nor get help before Monday. You are all alone, you have no responsibilities, no homework. Think about how you will use this critical situation to create a fun time for yourself. You have good food, wine, music, books, games, hot water, pen and paper, but no TV or radio.” After the work is completed, the participants are invited to implement these plans on the next weekend: “Is it worth waiting until your house is covered with snow?”.

As you discuss this activity, parents make a list of ways they like to take care of themselves.

Solving problems that directly affect the life of a parent. Parents are introduced to the principles of compiling "I-statements" to solve their problems.

Summing up the lesson. "Support".

Homework.

1) Daily self-care.

2) Discussion at the family council of the issue of a fairer, more equal distribution of responsibilities in the family.

3) Invite the child to come up with as many ways as possible in which he can take care of his parents.

Lesson 8. Conflicts and ways to resolve them.

Target:

familiarity with the concept of "negative attention";

awareness of their typical reactions in conflict situations;

constructive conflict resolution training.

Discussion of homework. It is necessary to draw the attention of parents to the fact that self-care does not necessarily require a lot of time, so typical self-justifications like “Not enough time” can be considered a manifestation of a defensive reaction to a change in the usual situation. Often one has to deal with the resistance of the family system to changes in the behavior of one of its members. Here it is necessary to maintain the correct balance between stimulating personal changes and maintaining the stability of the family structure.

Psychological workout. To introduce participants into the paradigm of the concept of "conflict", it is possible to use a variety of psychotechniques. We offer one of them.

Exercise 1. "Attention, conflict!". Participants are invited to come up with and draw a sign that warns of an impending conflict. Then the best symbolic image is chosen, or the group tries to combine all the ideas in one common sign (the latter option is preferable, especially within the framework of this topic).

The concept of "negative attention". Transferring responsibility to a child often leads to seemingly the most opposite results: the child begins to behave even worse, communication with him becomes more conflicting. This is due to the manifestation of one of the basic, deepest human fears: fear of the unknown, of new experience. The way children get the old familiar situation back is to force someone else to make decisions for them. This process is called the search for "negative attention". Understanding its mechanism allows you to competently resolve many emerging conflict situations. First of all, it is necessary to separate the concepts of conflict and the situation of its emotional reaction. By conflict we will understand the situation of conflict of divergent interests, and not the scene of its affective manifestation, as is usually the case.

Diagnosis of typical strategies of behavior in conflict. For this purpose, various psychodiagnostic techniques of a popular level can be used, since it is not so much their reliable information content that is important, but the ability to illustrate constructive and non-constructive strategies of behavior in a conflict.

Exercise 2. "Conflict situation". Playing out conflict situations presented by the participants of the training in the style of psychodrama.

Summing up the lesson. "Support".

Homework.

1) Search for individual ways of self-regulation of the emotional state in conflict.

2) Development of a cooperation strategy in resolving conflict situations.

Lesson 9. Parent workshop.

Target:

development of a comprehensive application of the experience gained in the training to solve specific pedagogical problems;

summarizing the work of the group, awareness of positive changes in the field of child-parent relationships.

Psychological workout. At the final lesson, there is a need for a specially organized procedure for the psychologist and participants to receive "feedback" from the group. A warm-up exercise can help with this task.

Exercise 1. "Paradoxical Sociometry". The names of all the members of the group are arranged in a circle on a sheet of paper. Participants take turns drawing an arrow from their name to the name of the participant they like the most, while saying the following phrase: “I love you, but I don’t like that you ...”.

Role playing situations. The purpose of this stage is to comprehensively apply the experience gained in the training and psychological and pedagogical knowledge to solve the actual problems of the participants. Parents themselves offer situations, they also distribute roles among group members. After “acting out” the initial situation, the participants share their thoughts and feelings. The work ends with the search and role-playing of new, more effective ways of responding in given conditions.

Summing up the work of the group. Parents share their impressions related to the effectiveness of the training work in writing and orally. Written reports are usually structured with questions that need to be answered. These questions can be the following: what was the most useful and interesting during the training (exercises, role-playing games, group discussions, information from a psychologist, homework assignments); what questions were answered; what issues remain unresolved; What problem would you like to work on further as a group?

Homework.

1) Write an essay "My child."

2) Prepare together with the child a concert number for the Family Holiday.

Lesson 10. Family Holiday.

Target:

developing the skills of cooperation and equal relationships with the child;

strengthening the positive experience of informal communication;

creating an atmosphere of mutual understanding and trust between family members and the training group.

Solemn presentation of diplomas on successful completion of the training. This ritual is aimed not so much at issuing any documents as creating an atmosphere of celebration and reinforcing a sense of success for parents. Traditionally, children who come to the holiday receive pre-prepared gifts, souvenirs from the group, symbolizing good and open relationships, love.

Psychological games and exercises. The use of specific techniques in order to unite children and parents, to gain experience of cooperation depends on the personal and professional preferences of the psychologist. We use various techniques of play and art therapy given by Sherman R. and Fredman N. The choice of techniques also depends on the age and number of children and other family members who came to the holiday.

Holiday concert. Families present concert numbers prepared by them for the holiday. Often this is the first experience of parents in the field of such cooperation with children.

The ritual of the end of the holiday. In our practice, the following procedure is used: all the participants of the holiday sit in a circle, pass a lit candle to each other and talk about how they imagine a happy family.

Literature

1. Adler A. Science to live.: (Sat.) - Kyiv: Port-Royall, 1997.

2. Robert T. Bayard, Jean Bayard. Your restless teenager. - M .: Family and school, 1995.

3. Bern E. Games that people play. People who play games. - Minsk: Potpourri, 1998.

4. Gippenreiter Yu.B. Communicate with the child. How? – M.: CheRo, 1998.

5. Ginott H. Parents and children. / Per. from English. – M.: Knowledge, 1986.

6. Dobrovich A.B. Eyes to eyes. - M., 1982.

7. Dobrovich A.B. Who is the psychotherapist in the family? – M.: Knowledge, 1985.

8. Dreikurs R., Solts V. Your child's happiness. Book for parents. – M.: Progress, 1986.

9. Dreykurs-Fergusson E. Introduction to the theory of Alfred Adler. - Mn., 1995.

10. Zhinot H. Parents and a teenager. - R.-on-D.: Phoenix, 1995.

11. Zimbardo F. Shyness. What is it and how to deal with it. - St. Petersburg: Peter, 1996.

12. Minukhin S., Fishman Ch. Techniques of family therapy, - M.: Klass, 1998.

13. Nelson D., Lot L., Glen S. Education without punishment. - InterDigest, 1997.

14. Oaklander V. Windows to the child's world. – M.: Klass, 1997.

15. Pezeshkian N. Positive family psychotherapy: family as a psychotherapist. - M.: Culture, 1994.

16. Rakhmatshaeva V. Grammar of communication. - M .: Family and school, 1995 ..

17. Satir V. You and your family: A guide to personal growth. - M .: April Press LLC: EKSMO-press, 2000.

18. Sidorenko E. Therapy and training according to Alfred Adler. - St. Petersburg: Speech, 2000.

psychological exercises for training

Training of interaction between parents and children "Learning to understand each other"

Rashkina Elena Alekseevna
DOU No. 3 of a compensating type for children with severe speech
disorders, teacher-psychologist of the 2nd category.

The issue of interaction and understanding of each other becomes more and more relevant within the family as the child grows up, and even more so if the child is a speech pathologist. The child grows up and changes, and the parent-child relationship should also change and develop. And for this it is necessary to learn to understand, look and see each other. The experience of working with the families of speech pathologists indicates the difficulties in establishing visual contact as a result of not accepting the child's problems. Group forms of work provide a unique opportunity to remove the feeling of uniqueness, the uniqueness of one's own difficulties, allow one to receive feedback (both from adults and children) and look at one's pedagogical experience from a different point of view.

Target: increasing the psychological competence of parents in matters of education and the development of effective communication skills with children.

Training objectives:

• strengthening the ability of parents to understand and empathize with the emotional world of their child, through the establishment of visual contact, physical contact, observation and joint activities;
• change of inadequate parental positions;
• optimization of forms of parental interaction in the process of raising children.

"Primary Group Code":

• the subject of discussion is children and ways of interaction of parents with them;
• all members of the group have the right to freely participate in the discussion, devoid of formalism and routine;
• the leader is not an absolute authority, the only source of information and judgments that must be accepted by all members of the group.

• increasing parental competence in matters of education
• org. correctional games with children aimed at the formation of a new type of relationship of equality and partnership - org. free games with children
• productive activities where the functions of "leader" and "follower" are divided between parent and child.
• stimulating the speech of children in the process of communicating with parents and other members of the group

Program idea: cooperation

• development of cooperation skills with the child
• recognition of the child's right to choose
• development of communication skills

Group value:

• see your child in communication with peers and other adults;
• reflect on your position and style of interaction with the child
• rallying DRO "We are a family"

Elements and techniques:

• fairy tale therapy (reading and discussion, composing, drawing a fairy tale; working with metaphor)
• play therapy (games and exercises, psycho-gymnastics, role-playing games)
• art therapy (work with drawing, visualization of images)

Training is conducted 4 days (the first is organizational and diagnostic for parents; three days together with children, the fourth day is final with a tea ceremony). At the end of the training, individual consultations with parents are held.

The duration of one lesson is 60 minutes, the last day is 90 minutes.

Class structure:

1. greetings
2. warm-up
3. general circle
4. parting
5. homework for adults

1 day (group of parents)

Material: Forms for each parent: “VRP”, “My family in the form of circles”, homework No. 1, scarf, 4 paintings “Type of family education”, 4 proverbs, relaxation text “Clearance from anxiety”, invitation to classes for each DR pair , music excerpt.

1. Greeting and introduction of the participants: everyone standing in a circle in turn says: “Hello, my name is ... Today I am like that ... (show their emotional state with facial expressions or gestures)”.

The group replies, "Hello, ... Today ... is like this (displays the participant's actions)."

2. Discussion: " Group rules»:

• open communication
• activity
• non-judgmental judgments
• voluntary participation
• Here and now

3. Talk: " Goals and objectives of the training»:

• rule 3 P: acceptance, recognition, understanding
• willingness to cooperate

Conditions and working hours: the next 3 days with children, homework, absences are undesirable, the last day is 90 minutes long. The training ends with a tea ceremony and gifts for the participants. The next day, an invitation and homework.

4. Expectations of participants from work.

5. Exercise “Braggathers” “I..., my child...” Each participant should describe himself and his child with 3 positive adjectives. The group responds to the participant: “We are happy for you!”

6. "Running":

• Stand up and change places for those who have one child;
• Stand up and change places for those who have a good relationship with children;
• Get up and change places for those who often play with the child.

7. Questionnaire "Parent-Child Interaction" (Appendix 1)

8. "Proverbs" Division into 2 groups, each receives two proverbs, explaining what our ancestors had to introduce:

• Without a root, grass does not grow.
• We are not like children, but they are like us.
• Mother's son, yes father's hunchback.
• A word of praise is rotten.

9. "Good and bad." 4 pictures are offered - the type of education.

One team calls "+" this type of education, and the other "-". (Appendix 2). We discuss what difficulties a child may face in kindergarten.

10. Test "My family in the form of a circle" Discussion of the impression of each drawing.

11. Exercise "Hands": One of the participants stands in a circle, they blindfold him, give him a hand, based on tactile sensations, he must say which parent is "soft or strict ..."

12. Relaxation "Purification of anxiety" (Appendix 3)

13. Discussion of the lesson

14. Farewell "General circle", presentation of invitations to classes with children

D / s No. 1: Fill in the table: “What makes me sad in my child and makes me happy”

Attachment 1

Parent-Child Interaction Questionnaire (PCR)

Instruction. Indicate the degree of agreement with the following statements on a 5-point system.

• 5 - definitely yes (very strong agreement);
• 4 - generally yes;
• 3 - both yes and no;
• 2 - rather no than yes;
• 1 - no (absolutely disagree)

1. If I demand something from a child, I will definitely achieve it.
2. I always punish him for bad deeds.
3. The child usually decides what clothes to wear.
4. My child can safely be left unattended.
5. The child can tell me about everything that happens to him.
6. I don't think he will achieve anything in life.
7. I often tell him what I don't like about him than what I like.
8. We often do housework together.
9. I am constantly worried about the health of the child.
10. I feel that I am consistent in my demands.
11. There are often conflicts in our family.
12. I would like him to raise his children the same way as I do.
13. A child rarely does what I ask for the first time.
14. I very rarely scold him.
15. I try to control all his actions and deeds.
16. I think the most important thing for him is to listen to me.
17. If he has a misfortune, first of all he shares with me.
18. I do not share his hobbies.
19. I do not consider the child as smart and capable as I would like.
20. I can admit I was wrong and apologize to him.
21. I often think that something terrible could happen to my child.
22. It is difficult for me to predict my behavior towards him.
23. My child's upbringing would have been much better if other family members hadn't interfered.
24. I like our relationship with the child.
25. At home, my child has more responsibilities than most of his friends.
26. We have to apply physical punishment to him.
27. He has to do as I say, even if he doesn't want to.
28. I think I know better than him what he needs.
29. I always sympathize with my child.
30. I think I understand him.
31. I would like to change a lot in it.
32. When making family decisions, I always take into account his opinion.
33. Think I'm an anxious mom (anxious dad)
34. My behavior is often unexpected for him.
35. It happens that when I punish a child, my husband (wife, grandmother ...) begins to reproach me for being too strict.
36. I think that in general I am raising my child correctly.
37. I make a lot of demands on him.
38. I am a gentle person by nature.
39. I let him walk alone in the courtyard of the house.
40. I strive to protect my child from difficulties and troubles.
41. I do not allow the child to notice my weaknesses and shortcomings.
42. I like his character.
43. I often criticize small things.
44. I am always willing to listen to him.
45. I think it is my duty to protect him from all dangers.
46. I punish him for the things that I do myself.
47. Sometimes, I unwittingly set the child against other family members.
48. I get tired of everyday communication with the child.
49. I have to force him to do what he doesn't want to.
50. I forgive him what others would punish him for.
51. I would like to know everything about him: what he thinks about, how he treats others, what he dreams about, ...
52. He chooses what to do at home in his free time.
53. I think that for a child I am the closest person.
54. I applaud his behaviour.
55. I often express my dissatisfaction with him.
56. I take part in the cases that the child comes up with.
57. I often think that someone might offend him.
58. It happens that I reproach and praise him, in essence, for one and the same thing.
59. It happens that if I tell him one thing, then the husband (wife, grandmother ...) specifically says the opposite.
60. It seems to me that my relationship with the child is better than in the families of most of my acquaintances.

Registration form

Full name _________________ Age ____ education _________

F.I. child_____________________ Age________

	Points			Points			Points			Points			Points		sum
1			13			25			37			49
2			14			26			38			50
3			15			27			39			51
4			16			28			40			52
5			17			29			41			53
6			18			30			42			54
7			19			31			43			55
8			20			32			44			56
9			21			33			45			57
10			22			34			46			58
11			23			35			47			59
12			24			36			48			60

Homework #1: Table

What makes me sad about my child	What makes me happy in my child

Annex 2

Annex 3

"Anxiety Cleansing"

Sometimes we get very tired, and then we want to relax ...

Lie down comfortably, close your eyes and try to imagine an unusual journey. All I'll say...

Let's collect the bag. Let's put everything that interferes in it: all insults, tears, quarrels, sadness, failures, disappointment... Let's tie it up and hit the road...

We left the house where you live, on a wide road ...

Our path is long, the road is hard, the bag presses on our shoulders, our arms and legs are tired and heavy. Oh-oh! How you want to relax! Let's do that. We take off the bag and lie down on the ground. Take a deep breath: inhale (hold for 3 seconds), exhale (hold for 3 seconds) - repeat 3 times. Breathe easily, evenly deeply ... Do you feel how the earth smells? The fresh smell of herbs, the aroma of flowers fills the breath. The earth takes away all fatigue, anxiety, resentment, fills the body with strength, freshness...

We must go further. Get up. Lift the bag, feel it become lighter... You are walking across the field among flowers, grasshoppers are chirping, bees are buzzing, birds are singing. Listen to these sounds... There is a clear stream ahead. The water in it is healing, tasty. You lean towards it, dip your palms into the water and drink this clean and cool water with pleasure. Feel how it spreads pleasantly throughout the body with coolness. It's nice and fresh inside, you feel lightness all over your body... Good! Enter the water. She pleasantly caresses the legs, relieves stress and fatigue. You jump from pebble to pebble, it is easy and joyful for you, the bag does not interfere at all, it has become even lighter ... Multi-colored splashes scatter and refresh your face, forehead, cheeks, neck, whole body with shiny droplets. Good-oh!

You easily crossed over to the other side. No obstacles are terrible!

On the smooth green grass stands a wonderful white house. The door is open and welcomes you in. There is a stove in front of you, you can dry off. You sit down next to her and look at the bright flames. They jump merrily while dancing; embers wink. Pleasant warmth caresses the face, hands, body, legs, ... It becomes cozy and calm. Good fire takes away all your sorrows, fatigue, sadness...

Look, your bag is empty... You leave the house. You are happy and relaxed. You enjoy breathing fresh air. A light breeze caresses your hair, face, body. The body seems to dissolve in the air, becomes light and weightless. You feel very good. The breeze fills your bag with joy, kindness, love...

You will take all this wealth to your home and share it with your children, relatives and friends. (Pause at least 30 seconds)

Now you can open your eyes and smile - you are at home and you are loved.

2 day

Material: Audio cassette “Top-top, clap-clap” by E. Zheleznova, scarf, 7 multi-colored petals for each pair, gluing base and glue stick, colored pencils, paper, musical soft toy “Flower-seven-color”

1. Acquaintance of participants in a circle: “Hello, my name is Lena, and you? »
2. Musical ex. “Well, everyone stood in a circle” aud. No. 3 Exercise. aimed at bringing the group together.
3. Work in dr pair. “Affectionate words” An adult, turning to a child, says: “Seryozha, you ... (3 affectionate words)”. The child then responds. So in a circle all the couples speak out.
4. Musical ex. "Clap" aud. No. 5 The first verse, each participant shows on himself parts of the body according to the text of the song, and the second verse is work in a pair.
5. "Guess the child by the face." Leading: the parent, with his eyes closed, takes turns feeling the faces of the children, trying to guess his child. The exercise is done in silence.
6. Exercise "Semitsvetik" Petals from a flower are scattered around the room. The participants of the couple must agree on who will collect the petals and who will stick them on the base.
7. "Make a wish". Make wishes: child - 3, parent - 3, and one joint. Desire discussion.
8. Joint drawing "Magic flower".

Parent and child are given one sheet of paper for two and felt-tip pens, pencils, paints, crayons. Instruction: “Now you will agree on what material you will use when completing the task, and who will start drawing first. At my signal, the first one begins to draw, the other silently watches, trying to understand the idea. On the second signal, the second member of the pair completes the drawing.

1. Inventing what magical power it has? The degree of satisfaction with the joint work.
2. Embracing Relaxation: "Flight of the Butterfly" (Appendix 4)
3. Farewell: “I give you a flower, you are my best friend ... (flower - “I love you”)
4. General circle: "Everyone, everyone, goodbye!"

Homework: "Composing a fairy tale about your child"

Appendix 4

Relaxation "Butterfly Flight"

Follow the movements of her wings. The movements of her wings are light and graceful. Now let everyone imagine that he is a butterfly. That he has beautiful and big wings… Feel your wings move slowly and smoothly up and down, up and down…

Enjoy the feeling of slowly and smoothly floating in the air. Now take a look at the motley meadow over which you are flying. See how many bright colors it has... Find the most beautiful flower with your eyes and gradually begin to approach it. Now you can even smell the fragrance of your flower. Slowly and smoothly land on the soft, fragrant center of the flower... look at it and the flowers around... Breathe in its scent again... and open your eyes.

Tell me about your feelings.

3 day

Material: a musical excerpt of instrumental music, pictograms (joy, resentment, fear, anger, surprise, fright), a split pictogram for each pair, glue stick, sheets of paper, pencils, an orange dummy (ball).

1. Greeting in a circle at a non-verbal level: children and adults move around the room to the music, at the signal “hands” they stop and shake hands, “noses” rub their noses, “brows” rub their foreheads. At the end of the “circle” - they stand in a circle and say in chorus: “I will raise my hands up, hello, I will tell you all!”
2. "The color of your mood" Close your eyes and imagine the color of your mood. The color of your (child) neighbor. The neighbor confirms or refutes the assumption. Clockwise action.
3. "Without words" - an analogy of the game "We will not say what we saw, but we will show what we did." First two teams: children and parents, and then Dr. couple.
4. Journey to the Rainbow City: an introduction to pictograms. I / U “Which (what), am I? " round.
5. "Collect the pictogram" Each Dr. couple gets a pictogram cut into pieces and draws, and the other participants have to guess. Discussion “When am I or my child like this?”
6. Parallel work: children draw “What I dream about”, and parents do the exercise: “Understand me, mom”. (Appendix 5) The cut table and it needs to be restored, correlating words and feelings. Upon completion of the work, adults voice the dream of the child according to his drawing
7. I / y "Orange" Participants in a circle without the help of hands pass an orange.
8. Musical ex. "Neighbours" aud. No. 23
9. And / at "Compliment"
10. General circle "Goodbye to everyone!"

Homework number 3: together with the child, remember your favorite game, in the next lesson, tell and prepare the attributes for the game.

Annex 5

"Understand me"

The child is talking	The child feels
Look, dad, I made a plane from a new constructor!	Pride. Satisfaction.
I'm not happy. I do not know what to do.	Boredom, stumped.
All the children play, but I have no one to play with.	Loneliness, abandonment.
I can do it. I don't need help. I'm old enough to do it myself.	Confidence, independence.
Go away, leave me alone. I don't want to talk to anyone.	Pain, anger, feeling of not love.
I can not. I try, but it doesn't work. Is it worth trying?	Frustration, desire to quit.
I am glad that my parents are you and dad, and not others.	Appreciation, gratitude, joy.

Day 4

Material: scarf, candle, gifts for participants (soft hearts), pens for each adult.

1. Greeting: "Hello, kind person!" right, left, in the center of the circle.
2. And / at “Guess the parent by the hand.” The child is given hands in turn, and he must guess the hand of his mother or father.
3. And / at "Boastful". Every child should brag about his mother, tell everyone about her.
4. Presentation of home games.
5. "Straw in the wind" All adults stand in a circle, stretch their arms palms forward. A "straw" is selected from the children. She stands in a circle blindfolded. On the command of an adult: "Keep your feet on the floor and fall back" Participants carefully pass the "straw" around the circle.
6. Reading fairy tales of parents to children
7. The host's tale "About the tender Teplyshki" (K. Steiner)
8. Candle farewell: “I want the flame of this candle to destroy all your sorrows and hardships, the warmth of this candle warmed your hearts and souls, its light illuminated your faces with a smile and love Dr. couple “I love you”, wishes to the participants. And now let's mentally thank each other for the work, let's take a breath and put out the candle together.
9. Gifts and tea for participants.
10. “Continue the offer” (feedback on the work in the training).

From working in the training, I gained ___________
I like it ___________
I did not like ___________
Would you like to participate in trainings ___________
Your wishes to the presenter ___________

Literature:

1. Zheleznova E. "Top-top, clap-clap": outdoor games (for classes in doctoral groups), M., 2006 Audio recording.
2. Kosyakova O.O. "Logopsychology", R-on-D., "Phoenix", 2007
3. Kryazheva N. L. “We rejoice together”: the development of the emotional world of children, series: “Practical work”, Yekaterinburg, 2006
4. Markovskaya I.M. "Training of interaction between parents and children": goals, objectives and basic principles, S.-P., 2005.
5. Sakovich N.A. "The practice of fairy tale therapy": a collection of fairy tales, games and therapeutic programs, S.-P., 2005.
6. Chernetskaya L.V. “Psychological games and trainings in kindergarten”, series: “I give my heart to children”, R-on-D., 2005
7. Chernyaeva S.A. "Psychotherapeutic Tales and Games". Series: "Art therapy", S.-P., 2004

This training system has been tested for two years. Classes were held both with parents, children of a mass kindergarten, and with parents and children of a compensatory type kindergarten. At the end of the training sessions, 100% of parents expressed their desire to further participate in such joint sessions. The work on the first day made it possible to diagnose and self-diagnose the problems of family education and interaction within the family. The use of a figurative author's representation of the types of education helps parents understand and analyze the positive and negative aspects of the pedagogical influences of parents. Understand why their child experiences difficulties in adaptation, socialization in kindergarten.

From the feedback of participants in 2007:

Elena Z., 35 years old “I got acquainted with the methods of education, rethought my attitude towards the child”

Svetlana K., 30 years old “I realized that everyone has certain problems with the child, and not just me, and this makes it easier. It was very interesting to look at the pictures and immediately everything became clear.”

The performance “My family in the image of circles” evokes an emotional response, but not the procedure of the image itself, but the subsequent discussion by other participants: distances of communication, proximity, dominance, blurring of the representation of the family ...

Joint activities with children, and especially on the first day, allow you to see what position the parents take in communicating with the child (ex. "Semitsvetik", "Make a Wish", "Magic Flower") in 80% of cases, children dominate. Discussing this fact, many parents experience: shock, disappointment in themselves, realize their own failure and loss. 100% of adult participants find it difficult to perform exercises of the type "Bank of Strokes": "Boasts", "Tell me about yourself and the child", "Complement". In children, this percentage is significantly lower than 45%, this is due to the experience of participating in communicative games in the psychologist's classes, during the circle hour, and less exposure of children to various conventions. The third day allows you to establish contact on a non-verbal level, learn to understand the emotional state of another by facial expressions, gestures, expressive movements and activate the inner child of an adult. All groups of adults experience significant difficulties in correlating words and feelings, and therefore in understanding their child, another loved one. It is after the passage of this day that the participants have a community of “We”.

Participant 2008: Dmitry N., 34 “I liked that today in the training not only the child and I understand each other, but also the children and parents are very close”

Therefore, this particular day ends with compliments around the circle and muses. exercise "Neighbours": neighbors can be pushed, neighbors can be tickled, neighbors can be hugged.

It makes no sense to talk and describe the state of children, their eyes glow with joy, the opportunity to communicate and play with their loved ones.

Completion of work on the fourth day: getting tactile sensations, once again working through the “Bank of strokes”, getting confidence and support from adults, strong people. Presentation of homework: reading fairy tales for children and about children and games. For 70% of the participants, doing homework caused resistance (once; I don’t know how to compose fairy tales and never did it; we don’t play, but only walk; he runs, and I look; what if I do something wrong, ...) and 25% noted this fact in the questionnaire as something they did not like. This may indicate that parents are already ready to participate in various activities and be led, but are not yet ready today to actively work on their problems.

Of course, whatever result is obtained, this is an occasion for further analysis and work. Everyone benefited: children, having received time to communicate and play with their parents, parents: “gained knowledge, a skill how to understand a child in a difficult situation and sort out the problem with him”, a psychologist: the opportunity to reflect on their own activities and improve their professional skills.

17.03.2010

Katerina

I study at the Pedagogical University, my future profession is a psychologist. Plans for such trainings are a real find for me
21.03.2010

Thanks a lot for the tutorial. It was necessary to hold a parent meeting in an unusual form. This outline is very good.
20.08.2010

Svetlana.

I decided to open a psychological circle for junior classes. The problem with the lack of literature and funds for it has disappeared thanks to your website. Thank you very much!!! Of course, this kind of training brings a lot of benefits. Let our world be kinder and brighter, and we will help this!
21.02.2017

E. Rashkina

Thanks for the feedback. I'm glad my experience is useful to you. The author of the technique is T. V. Rumyantseva. Test "Circles of relationships", we work by analogy.
13.08.2018 Topic: "I want to understand my child."

Form of carrying out: Training for parents.

The audience: parents of the senior group

Number of participants: 12 people

Tasks:

1. Expansion of contact between group teachers and parents.

2. Increasing the pedagogical culture of parents.

3. To acquaint parents with methods and techniques that contribute to the development of harmonious parent-child relationships.

4. Creation of a favorable emotional climate in the family.

Expected results:

Developing positive relationships between children and parents.

Exchange of experience between parents on the upbringing of their children.

Information and technical support:

Making posters with statements of prominent people about education, about the relationship between adults and children:

“Parents do not understand how much harm they cause their children when, using their parental authority, they want to impose their beliefs and views on life on them” (F.E. Dzerzhinsky).

“Raise your children in virtue, it alone can give happiness”

(L. Beethoven).

“Children have their own special ability to see, think and feel, and there is nothing more stupid than trying to replace this ability with ours” (Jean-Jacques Rousseau).

“Every art, and the art of education too, aims to make up for what is lacking from nature” (Aristotle) .

“Then we pray to the gods for children, so that they reflect our adversaries and know how to give honor to a friend” (Sophocles) .

“The best way to make a child good is to make him happy” (Oscar Wilde)

Materials and equipment: badges (according to the number of participants), tape recorder, musical recordings, paper f. A 4, pencils (felt-tip pens).

Carrying out logic:

Good evening dear parents. I thank you for coming to our such an unusual meeting. Today we will communicate with you in a close, family circle and try to learn a lot of new things both about ourselves and about our children.

Psychological training is the training of the soul, mind, body. A person absorbs 10% of what he hears, 50% of what he sees, 90% of what he does.

In the course of work, we will have to communicate with each other, so we ask all participants to sign and attach business cards - badges, so that everyone knows how to contact you.

Introduction:

In each of us there are three people "Child, parent, adult." In life situations we play different roles. Depending on the situation, we can either be a small child, or a strict parent, or reason like "adults". Here we will try to play, to realize these roles.

First, let's get to know each other.

1. Exercise "Binding thread". Participants call their names in a circle.

And now let's try to answer the question “What is communication, what should it be? ”(Answers of parents).

Communication and relationships with other people are born and developed in childhood. For a child, adults are a model in everything. Children learn well what is presented visually, they want to learn everything from their own experience. He is especially attracted to those activities that adults try to hide from him. The baby does not remember everything, but only what struck him. Children always try to imitate adults, which is sometimes dangerous. Unable to distinguish between good and bad, they tend to do what adults forbid them, but allow themselves. In this regard, in the presence of children, one must refrain from such actions and deeds that cannot serve as a good example for them.

Children's speech develops better in an atmosphere of love, calm, when adults listen carefully to them, communicate with children, read fairy tales to them and discuss what they read.

If a child does not feel sensitivity and love from those around him, then he has a distrustful attitude towards the world, and possibly a feeling of fear, which can persist for a lifetime. In the process of developing a child's communication skills, much attention must be paid to the formation of the child's personal qualities, his feelings, emotions. When people are happy and at peace with themselves, they transfer those feelings to relationships with others.

Today we must understand that parental love will bring a child much more happiness if he constantly sees that it manifests itself in the relationship of parents not only to him, but also to each other, and the child should feel love.

“Happiness is when you are loved and understood,” and this understanding does not come by itself, it needs to be learned.

2. Exercise "Parent and child."(You need to split into pairs). Let's try to consider the following situations:

1. On behalf of the child, tell us how you managed to wet everything that was possible from your clothes in the only spring puddle, at the moment when the mother was talking with a friend who unexpectedly approached. Hint: speak on behalf of the child, voicing the possible course of his thoughts.

And the reaction of the mother when she saw the wet child ...

Summary. I think that a reminder of this opportunity for adults to penetrate into the world of children will help organize the process of education more competently, build interaction in the family more fruitfully.

2. Parent and child are selected.

Dear parents! You are in a hurry, you ran to the kindergarten for your child. A car is waiting for you on the street, and your daughter (son) is naughty, does not want to get dressed.

Your reaction, actions, etc.?

3. You are in the store and the child demands that you buy him another car or toy. Your actions? (the child is already on the verge of hysteria)

4. You are in a bad mood or you are late for work, you brought your child to kindergarten, but he does not want to go to the group, he is naughty. Your actions?

5. The child has done something or got dirty, He must tell his mother this, knowing that his mother will swear. What is your reaction to the confession?

3. Exercise "Associations". Our goal is to raise a happy child. Who can raise a happy child. Who is a happy child? Who is an effective parent? We will answer these questions by working in groups.

Instructions: The group is divided into 2 teams.

Team 1: Write your associations when you hear the word "happy child".

Team 2: Write your associations when you hear the word "effective parent"

Discussion.

The most important teachers for children are parents. The parental home is the first school for the child. The family has a huge influence on what the baby will consider important in life, on the formation of his value system. No matter how long a person lives, from time to time he turns to the experience of childhood, to life in the family: "what my father and mother taught me."

Often, parents and caregivers, making comments to kids in life-threatening situations, use the wrong tactics. Instead of telling the child what to do, parents tell the child what not to do. As a result, the child does not receive the necessary information, and the words of the adult provoke him to do the opposite (For example: What will the child do to the words: “Do not come to the TV!”).

Appeal to the child should be positive, i.e., suggest a response action, and not inaction.

4. Exercise "Non-Children's Bans"

One participant is selected and sits on a chair in the center of the circle. Everyone else comes up to him one at a time and tells him what they forbid him to do - what the participants most often tell their child. At the same time, the part of the body that was affected by the ban is tied with a ribbon. For example: "Don't scream! "- the mouth is tied, "Do not run" - the legs are tied, etc.

After all the participants have spoken, the seated person is invited to stand up. Since he will not be able to get up, he must be untied. To do this, each participant approaches the ribbon that he tied up and removes the ban, that is, he says what you can do. Thus, the essence of the prohibition remains. For example: "Don't shout - speak calmly."

Reflection

Reflection of the participant who played the role of the child:

– What did you feel when "parents" fettered, limited your freedom?

– Which part of the body did you feel most restricted in movement?

– How did you feel when you were asked to stand?

– What did you want to untie first?

– What do you feel now?

Reflection of the participants who played the role of an adult:

– How did you feel when you saw the immobilized child?

– What did you want to do?

– Is it easy to find words to reformulate the prohibition?

– What feelings are you experiencing now?

It is known that there are no ready-made recipes for education. How to act as an adult in a given situation, it is up to him to decide. However, you can play difficult situations, as in the theater, discuss them and try to understand what the child is experiencing in this or that case.

The child's ideas about the world have not yet been formed, and life experience is negligible. Our task - the task of adults surrounding the child - is to help navigate in a world that is still incomprehensible to him, to explain what is dangerous and impermissible, and what is permissible and even necessary for the baby. Who, if not an adult, will protect the child, warn against dangers and at the same time teach them to understand the endless “don’t” and “can”! To teach this to children, parents themselves need to be well versed in this.

5. Exercise "Sun of Love"

Each participant draws a sun on a piece of paper, in the center of which he writes the name of the child. On every ray of the sun, you need to list all the wonderful qualities of your children. Then all participants demonstrate their "sun of love" and read out what they have written. I suggest you take this Sunshine home. Let its warm rays warm the atmosphere of your home today. Tell your child about how you assessed his qualities - give the child warmth, affection and attention.

Literature:

1. Galiguzova L. N. Smirnova E. O. The art of communication with a child from one to six years old. - M. : ARKTI, 2004.

2. Gippenreiter Yu. B. Communicate with the child. How? TC Sphere, 2001.

3. Gorshenina V. V. The system of work of the kindergarten to prevent and overcome the difficulties of family education. Volgograd: Panorama, 2006.

4. Moskalyuk O. V., Pogontseva L. V. Pedagogy of mutual understanding. Activities with parents. - Volgograd, : 2008.

5. Tkacheva VV Harmonization of intra-family relations: father, mother, I - a friendly family: a workshop on the formation of adequate intra-family relations. - M.: 2000.

6. Shipitsina L. M., Zashchirinskaya O. V., Voronova A. P. Communication ABC: development of the child’s personality, communication skills with adults and peers (for children from 3 to 6 years old) .- M .: Linka-Press, 2005.

(As part of the week of psychology)

Target: optimization and harmonization of intra-family relations by means of the game.

• contribute to the creation of positive emotions of children and parents in interaction with each other;
• instill in children a sense of trust, self-confidence;
• improve parent-child interaction.

Equipment: audio recordings with funny children's songs, a ball, a blindfold, a candle, matches, chairs according to the number of participants, a box (box), emoticons according to the number of participants.

Course of the training

To the cheerful music, the participants of the training go to the hall and sit down on chairs prepared in advance, arranged in a circle.

Psychologist : Hello parents! Hello guys! We are glad to welcome you to our gaming training.

In preschool age, the leading activity is a game activity. Children love to play anywhere and in anything, and if parents also connect to their games, then the game becomes not just a game, but a source of joy because the child and parents communicate through the game.

The game has powerful developmental characteristics. It affects the development of all cognitive processes. The game is of particular importance for the development of voluntary behavior, which will no doubt be needed with admission to school, which means that it needs to be trained now.

1. "Affectionate Name" First, the psychologist, starting with himself, calls his full name, and then his name in a diminutive form. Then in a circle, everyone performs this exercise until the turn again reaches the psychologist.
2. "Hugs". Psychologist: " How often do you hug your children, just like that, for no reason? What do you think, is there a necessary number of hugs to maintain good health?

The famous American family therapist Virginia Satir recommended hugging a child several times a day, saying that 4 hugs are necessary for everyone, just for survival, and at least 8 hugs a day for good health. And, by the way, not only to a child, but also to an adult.

Parents and children are encouraged to hug each other as tightly as possible.

1. The game "Guess the child ». Psychologist: “How well do you know your children? Now we believe it."

Parents are blindfolded in turn, children sit on high chairs. Every parent needs to find their child by touch.

1. Game "A story about mom." The children are invited to take turns telling about their parents with whom they came.
2. Dragon Tail game or "Golden Gate". at the discretion of the psychologist.
3. Exercise Favorite Behavior. Parents are encouraged to remember and say what they love about their children's behavior.
4. Dance warm-up for everyone (dance of little ducklings). The song "dance of little ducklings" sounds. All participants of the training, together with a psychologist, perform a familiar dance.
5. Exercise "+ qualities". Parents are invited to remember and name 3 positive qualities of their child.
6. Candle exercise. A lit candle is passed around in a circle, whoever has a candle in his hands should wish for tomorrow, something good for the group.

Psychologist: "Dear Parents! Dance, sing, play with your children. A good child is a happy child. Happy child means happy and healthy parents.

Reflection. It is proposed to parents and children to evaluate the usefulness, significance, necessity of the training by putting emoticons of different colors in the box.