Chinese wedding through the eyes of a Russian bride. A combination of beautiful traditions and unique rituals at a Chinese wedding

Hello, dear readers - seekers of knowledge and truth!

We continue to study Asian countries and get acquainted with their people, culture and civilization. Mentally moving in time and space, we have already studied many customs of different nationalities. And today we invite you to talk about wedding traditions in China.

The Celestial Empire has a long history, and each of its provinces, to some extent, followed its own path of development. Needless to say, even different parts of the same region have special, original traditions here. They are united by one thing - an inextricable link with the past, an incredible wedding spectacle, a touching ceremony and extraordinary beauty outfits.

You can talk about Chinese weddings endlessly. Today's article will briefly talk about how weddings took place before, and how it happens now, where the newlyweds celebrate the main day in their lives, what ancient customs are observed to this day and what imprint the modern fashion has left on wedding rituals.

Chinese wedding before

Preparation

A wedding is a wonderful event in the life of young people. Preparations for it begin long before the celebration itself.

In ancient China, the father chose the bride for his son, based on personal preferences and the position of the girl's family in society. After the final choice could not do without the services of a matchmaker, whose skills promised half the success in such a difficult task.

A matchmaker with gifts appeared at the bride's house to convey the desire of the groom's parents to marry their son, and at the same time to find out everything about the girl, her parents, brothers and sisters: names, surnames, dates of birth. This data helped to draw up a compatibility horoscope and, if everything went well, choose the date of the upcoming celebration.

It often happened that the wedding could take place only after a couple of years, because the stars suggested so. Only after the announcement of the date, the future spouse could begin to dream about the wedding, plan, select outfits.

Then the young man again sent gifts to the chosen one as a sign of engagement: precious stones, jewelry, gold coins, wedding paraphernalia. She, in turn, had to send a dowry to the house of her future husband. If it was not sent, it could be regarded as a refusal to marry.


The dowry usually included a variety of items that had a special meaning:

  • butterfly scissors - symbolized warmth, hearth in the future home;
  • vase - meant peace, harmony;
  • fruit plate - indicated a tendency to fertility;
  • coins - promised material well-being;
  • furniture;
  • kitchenware;
  • cloth;
  • personal items.

An interesting attribute was hung over the front door of both houses - the hieroglyph "si", which means happiness: for the bride - single, for the groom - double, which meant double happiness that he would bring into the house with the bride. It is curious that this tradition is often honored today.

On the day of the wedding, the future spouse sent a palanquin, elegantly decorated with red cloth, for the chosen one, and he himself rode nearby in a cortege.


outfits

Meanwhile, the girl was preparing for the arrival of her betrothed, putting on a traditional scarlet outfit. She worked on her face the day before: she removed all hair from her face, including eyelashes and eyebrows. It meant readiness for a new life.

Makeup and powder were generously applied to a smooth face. The eyes were emphasized with thick arrows, and the lips with red lipstick.

A hairstyle was constructed on the head, which could only be worn by married women, and a headdress in the form of a phoenix, decorated with large beads, was put on top. It is a pity that such beauty was not visible - a red cape was put on top, which hid the face of the beauty throughout the day.

The phoenix is ​​a symbol of the feminine, while the groom wore a suit depicting a dragon, the male symbol.


Ceremony

Upon arrival to the chosen one, to loud music and an explosion of crackers, the young man again presented gifts: money in a red envelope, which was a kind of ransom, earrings, bracelets made of precious metals. He knelt with a cup of tea in front of her parents, thereby asking for a blessing.

For the bride, it was partly a sad holiday - she said goodbye to her stepfather's house, to her relatives, mourned her past life and did not skimp on tears. Later, sitting in a palanquin, she, accompanied by a wedding cortege, went to her husband's house, which would soon become her home too.

Here, young people were also greeted with music, crackers, fireworks - this custom not only reflected a wave of general fun - it was believed that it also got rid of evil spirits. At the entrance to the groom's house there was a special altar, in front of which it was necessary to perform a series of rites, to make offerings to various deities.


The ceremony necessarily took place in the second half of the hour, that is, when the minute hand crosses the thirty-minute mark and begins to rise up the dial. This custom is due to the fact that a new family should be born on the rise.

After the prescribed rituals, the newlyweds drank sweet wine, joined their hands, tying them with a red thread - from that time on, the woman was inextricably linked with the man. The celebration ended with folk festivals, a plentiful feast, fun, and games.

Only at the end of the evening could the newly-made husband throw back the veil that hides the face of his wife and see him.


Throughout the wedding day, the wife could not utter a word - according to beliefs, this helped her soon give birth to heirs. So the girl was just a “silent doll” at her own holiday.

An important role in the formation of the family was played by the family bed and its preparation, which was usually done by a parent with many children - a very lucky person in the understanding of the Chinese. He scattered grains, nuts, fruits on the bed so that the firstborn would appear in the family as soon as possible. For greater effect, children could frolic on the bed.

Chinese wedding now

The modern Chinese wedding has undergone significant changes. New fashion trends have left their mark on the appearance of the newlyweds and wedding celebrations, but tribute to the ancestors and some traditions have remained unchanged.

Preparation

Today, young people themselves choose their soul mates, but still listen to the advice of older relatives. And all the same, faith in horoscopes remains strong, without which almost no marriage is made.

The guy proposes to his beloved, after which they turn to astrologers who calculate compatibility and the ideal time to enter into an alliance. On the chosen day, the couple signs, and the celebration for guests is usually scheduled for a day off, so that it would be convenient for everyone to witness the birth of a new cell of society.

Preparations for a significant event have been going on for several months. Perhaps her favorite part is the numerous photo shoots for the wedding album, which are accompanied by a change in images, costumes, scenery, landscapes, panoramas.

Thousands of shots are retouched, selected to later decorate the stand at the door of the restaurant and the matrimonial bedroom, reminiscent of the pleasant pre-wedding chores.

outfits

Today's brides are increasingly dressed in white, cream or milky wedding dresses, covered with a fluffy snow-white veil. But still, red accessories, symbolizing success, must certainly be present. It can be shoes, jewelry, ribbons, garters.


The groom's suit is also becoming a European classic. But a change of outfits is welcomed - during the evening, the newlyweds can change three outfits, and they also do not bypass traditional Chinese costumes.

Ceremony

The palanquins with porters were replaced by comfortable red or white cars, decorated with hieroglyphs of happiness. After the groom takes the bride from the parental home, the whole procession goes to the solemn ceremony. It can take place both in the temple and at the young man's home.

An indispensable part of the ceremony is the oath of the newlyweds. They kneel, bowing to relatives, gods and each other. The oath is followed by a tea ceremony, during which the girl treats her new husband's relatives with tea. In response, she is presented with jewelry, money in a red package.


In the evening after the wedding ceremony, all the invitees go to the restaurant to celebrate the created union of two hearts from the bottom of their hearts. Relatives, friends, colleagues, bosses, influential acquaintances are invited, who sit in a certain order relative to the main table.

Official congratulations, wishes of happiness to the young and cash gifts are replaced by general fun. Curiously, the Chinese almost never dance, and weddings are no exception. But their favorite pastime is karaoke.

Even at the most modest wedding, the table boasts a rich menu. The waiters barely have time to change the dishes, the number of which reaches twelve. And even different types of appetizers, hot dishes, fish soup, poultry, seafood, meat, vegetables, delicacies like shark - all this fades against the backdrop of the gigantic size of the cake!


By the end of the evening, tired but satisfied spouses should thank everyone who came personally. This is how the first day of the life of a Chinese family ends, and ahead is family life, which seems to the newlyweds an eternity - happy and rosy.

Conclusion

Thank you very much for your attention, dear readers! May love, happiness and prosperity never leave you.

China is a unique country with many interesting and unusual traditions for Europeans.

A Chinese wedding is not only a complex ritual, but also just a fun holiday. For all who are interested, we present a short tour of the history of wedding traditions in China.

Pre-wedding Chinese traditions

The Chinese are an Asian nation with their own culture, very different from the European one and, accordingly, with their own customs and traditions.

Matchmaking in China takes place in several stages:


To do this, they attract a specialist who draws up a map of the starry sky and, based on it, offers the most suitable dates for marriage.

It is believed that an incorrectly chosen date promises an unhappy family life for a young couple. After the date is chosen, it is communicated to the guests.

  • Mourning. There is an interesting tradition in the Chinese wedding ceremony - mourning the loss of relatives. The bottom line is that before marriage, a Chinese girl must mourn the loss of her family.

The Chinese are very reverent and responsible for the institution of marriage. For this ceremony, the bride and her close relatives go to some special place, where the girl is given time to say goodbye to her relatives.

This ceremony is sad and very touching.

Stages of a traditional Chinese wedding

Conventionally, this beautiful Chinese ceremony can be divided into the following stages:

Tea gift.

It is customary for the groom to bring gifts wrapped in red cloth to his bride's house on the wedding day. The gifts are gold coins, a pair of earrings and four bracelets.

The wedding procession is accompanied by explosions of crackers, fireworks, it is believed that this drives away evil spirits and marks the birth of a new family.

Be sure, before and now at the Chinese wedding, there is an abundance of red and sweet wine, which is believed to promote fidelity in a couple.

But often Chinese brides prefer a red wedding dress or robe.

This is due to the fact that if we look at the clock face, then the minute hand goes down in the first half of the hour, and goes up in the second half of the hour.

  • So in the Chinese wedding tradition, it is believed that the wedding ceremony itself should take place on the rise.
  • So, a Chinese young family begins a life together "on the rise", otherwise - "on the decline."

Wedding cake in China.

The main dish on the Chinese wedding table is the wedding cake. It must be unusually beautiful and large.

Cake in China is usually met with the enthusiastic approval of the guests. It must impress with its size.

The decoration of the wedding cake can be symbolism associated with a tiger or a snake.

A Chinese traditional wedding cake should be multi-staged and wide enough, because it symbolizes the steps that a new Chinese family will climb in a life together.

The wedding torus in China symbolizes a ladder to a prosperous and happy future.

From these beliefs and beliefs of the Chinese people, a tradition arose for such truly huge wedding cakes. The bride and groom must feed each other with a wedding cake.

wedding banquet

On the wedding Chinese table, fish must be present - this is a symbol of abundance. Dishes, like liquors and wines at a Chinese wedding, must be expensive and of high quality.


Fish testifies to the prosperity and wealth of families.
A Chinese wedding can have up to 12 courses. Guests are seated in such a way that the neighbors at the table are familiar with each other.

The table at a Chinese wedding is round in shape. A traditional Chinese wedding dish is shark fin soup.

Before the start of the solemn part, guests participate in wedding games and take memorable photos with the bride and groom.

Of course, over time, Chinese wedding traditions have undergone strong changes, but the rituals associated with fertility are also relevant in modern weddings, and it is not for nothing that the Chinese are probably the most prolific nation in the world.

“In sorrow and joy, in wealth and poverty, in sickness and joy, until death do us part,” newlyweds in all corners of the world swear every second. How is the wedding and marriage in China? ECD, based on numerous Chinese sources and materials from English-language articles, tried to understand the realities of a modern Chinese wedding.

  • Marriages in China are concluded in accordance with the "Marriage Law" of 1981, which enshrined the basic principles of relations between family members: monogamy, equality of men and women, free marriage. The legal age for marriage is 22 for men and 20 for women.

Literally a few decades ago, marriages organized by parents were very common in China. Young people got married only because their parents decided so. It even happened that the newlyweds saw each other for the first time only at their own wedding. Arranged marriages were extremely common. Weddings were organized even before the birth of the child with the consent of the parents.

Today, Chinese marriage traditions have changed a lot. Now young people marry those they love. But in order to show their respect for their parents, they need to obtain official permission from them in advance for the wedding.


Wedding preparations

First, young people must pay an official visit to their parents. When visiting the girl's parents, the young man must bring gifts. When a girl visits the groom's house, his parents should also prepare a small gift for her. One of the wedding customs is the preparation of a dowry.


Choosing a day for the wedding

The main condition for holding a wedding is a well-chosen day, which should symbolize goodness and good energy. The choice of the day for the wedding is made on the basis of the Chinese lunar calendar. Often, couples have to wait for the cherished day for several years.


Mourning the loss of loved ones

The Chinese wedding has an unusual tradition - mourning the loss of loved ones. Before a girl marries, she must mourn the loss of loved ones. The fact is that after the wedding, the girl becomes part of the husband’s family, so the bride is given time so that she can “say goodbye” to her parents and other relatives. At this time, alone with her family, she recalls her childhood and communicates on family topics.


Photoshoot

Since the late 1990s, creating wedding albums has become extremely popular in China. The album usually consists of many photos of the bride and groom, taken in different places in various outfits. Unlike Western wedding photos, a Chinese wedding album will not contain photos of the actual ceremony and wedding. At the celebration, guests are invited to view the finished portfolio.


Wedding ceremony

The groom arrives at the house of the bride's parents, greets them and shows them every respect. The couple then make their way to the groom's parents' house, where the couple greet his parents together. The bride and groom are accompanied by relatives and friends.


Marriage vows

During the wedding ceremony, a young couple kneels three times, bowing to heaven, earth, parents and a family plaque, and then to each other.


"Tea" gift

On the day of the wedding, the groom brings gifts to the bride's house, wrapped in a red cloth containing gold coins, a pair of earrings and four bracelets. Such a gift symbolizes fertility and marital fidelity.

As a ransom, the groom gives money and other gifts, which are determined in advance. After the ransom of the bride, the groom kneels before his parents and gives them a cup of tea, asking them for permission to marry.


Banquet

The banquet takes place after the wedding. At the banquet, the newlyweds must drink half a glass of wine tied with a ribbon. The newlyweds then switch hands and drink the remaining half. According to legend, this will help the newlyweds to love each other firmly and for a long time. In some provinces of China, fish is served at the banquet table, which should not be eaten completely. The head, tail and bones of the fish must be left intact. It symbolizes a happy marriage from beginning to end.

A wedding banquet in China does not last long - just a couple of hours, or even less. You will not see any festivities until the morning with songs, contests, dances, familiar to our compatriot, here.

However, these days many young people try to skip most of these rituals and ceremonies. Some do this because they believe that new generations are not obliged to follow the old traditions, while others refuse to traditional marriage because of the economy, trying to save more money for later family life.

Anna Ivanova

This story is about how I was the first (and probably the only) time I attended a Chinese wedding, and even as a bridesmaid. It all started one August morning, when my Chinese friend Tanya delighted me with the news: firstly, she is getting married, secondly, she invites me to the wedding, and thirdly, she invites me to become a bridesmaid. It was nice to receive an invitation to a Chinese wedding not only because you are European, but also because you are a friend, and I began to look forward to this day - October 16, 2016. The bride, meanwhile, has already begun to actively prepare.

wedding preparations

The wedding date was chosen taking into account that there were even numbers - 10/16/16, at the same time there are many lucky numbers "6". And in fact, there was little time left for preparation - just over two months. After the wedding, I realized how much everything needed to be organized and prepared, how many little things to think through and not forget anything. What are the bride's outfits alone worth: there should be at least three of them.

Back in August, the bride and groom went from Harbin to the picturesque Xiamen for a wedding photo shoot, where they managed to change up to six outfits in one day: for example, the bride was in dresses of white, lilac, blue and other colors. The photos really turned out to be colorful and interesting, they were shown to the guests on a wide screen on the wedding day, and now they decorate all the walls in the newlyweds' new apartment.

The complexity of organizing this wedding was also in the fact that it was held in the groom's hometown - the city of Hegang, located almost 500 km from Harbin, and this despite the fact that the groom himself has not lived there for a long time. Therefore, among other things, it was necessary to solve the issue of transport, housing and food for guests from Harbin.

The marriage itself, by the way, took place before the official ceremony - about a month. According to Tanya, the month between the registration of marriage and the wedding is a very short period, sometimes even a year, and it also happens that they don’t save money for the wedding.

The day before the wedding

On October 15, early in the morning at 8 o’clock, together with the parents, relatives and close friends of the bride (30 people in total), we were already riding a specially rented bus from Harbin to Hegang, and despite the long 8-hour journey, it was comfortable to travel. In Hegang, the guests were accommodated in a five-star hotel, where on the top floor there was a room for the bride, and gifts were prepared in the guest rooms - corn grits and rice oil, locally produced products. That same evening, all the guests from the bride's side came to dinner, where, in addition to delicious food and delicacies, they offered Chinese vodka, which the older generation actively drank.

After dinner, the bride gathered her bridesmaids, and we all began to discuss the ransom. Me and my friend Ela, also invited to the wedding, were told to just sit, smile and take "" - a bride price in red envelopes.

Wedding day

It all started early in the morning: at 7:30 we were already in the room of the bride, dressed in a white dress, waiting for the arrival of the groom. This hour of time was not wasted: the photographer photographed the bride with her bridesmaids, and then with her parents. 8:30 - the groom arrives with friends. They perform various tasks such as “saying “I love you” in different ways” or “calling the sweetheart with different words”, etc., and all this takes place in front of the bride (unlike a Russian wedding). The ransom is completed, the groom kissed the bride, but the tests are not over either - the young are sitting on the bed, in front of them is a table with apples, bananas, cakes and other sweets, and they feed each other with it. Then the groom finds the bride's shoe, puts it on and that's it, at this the events at the hotel end.

The next scene of action is a sanatorium-type complex, where in one of the houses there is a “groom's room”, it is here that the wedding night will take place. To fireworks and applause, the bride and groom get out of the car, and the bride is in a red veil. They enter a room where an inscription is laid out on the bed with nuts and dates, saying that a child should be born in the family as soon as possible. The bride sits on her and then the groom washes her hands. After that, they drink tea with his parents and grandparents, the bride expresses her respect to them by serving them a cup of tea, and they in turn give them hongbao with money. Finally, the bride changes into a second, very beautiful dress with a long train. The second act is completed.

The scene of the third act is a banquet hall, located right next to it. The guests are all assembled (150 people, and this is not much by Chinese standards), shots from the wedding photo shoot are shown on the big screen, the presenter is standing on the stage, telling the love story of a young couple. Despite all the pathos, all this is really very touching. Again, an engagement takes place in front of all the guests, and then the bride and groom exchange rings. They bow to their parents, drink a glass of champagne, and the bride is about to toss her bouquet. To my surprise, even the groom's friends caught it (probably very funny when a man catches a bouquet). Considering that I was pushed forward, the bouquet flew into my hands. Happy, they ask me to say a few words, and since Tanya warned about such an outcome of events, I prepared a short speech the day before, and I said it on stage.

The ceremony ends here, and finally, it was possible to sit down at the table, where, among other things, gifts were prepared for the guests in the form of boxes of sweets, while the young wife, meanwhile, changed into a red dress, and together with her husband they walked around each table, raising a glass .

As soon as I started to relax and move away from all this fuss, we were told to change clothes. So, already at 1 o'clock in the afternoon, the guests began to disperse, the balloons began to blow off, the wedding was over. Before I knew it, we were already on the bus back to Harbin.

After the wedding

According to tradition, the wife should spend a couple more days at her husband's house, and on the third day they returned to Harbin, where they arranged a banquet for those who were not present at the wedding in Hegang. After all these weddings, the newlyweds were able to breathe easy and go on a honeymoon trip to Australia.

In fact, it was interesting to take part in a Chinese wedding, everything is so unusual and new, but it was a pity for the bride, it seems to me that she was very tired that day. In addition to unforgettable impressions, I took away a bouquet, a dress from the wedding (Tanya bought dresses for her friends and left them for us as a gift), gifts and hongbao.

Ni hao and hello, dear Reader! This article is about the modern Chinese wedding. A Chinese wedding is an extraordinary cocktail of Asian traditions, modern lifestyle, a variety of cuisines, and, oddly enough, business.

In ancient China, there were many traditions and beliefs associated with marriage, many of which have survived to this day. Although the modern Chinese are very different from their ancient predecessors, they still try to observe the canons of the wedding ceremony even now.

Let's start with the bride. Modern Chinese women strive for marriage only when they are “finally matured” for family life, becoming independent and self-reliant (this fact always surprises me a little, since most people traditionally live after the wedding with their parents and this is not always a matter of finances). That is, somewhere after 25-27 years, ladies begin to think about marriage. If earlier the bride got married in a traditional red dress, now, under the influence of Western fashion, brides prefer to rent a white dress, more precisely cream or ivory, because the classic white color has symbolized grief and sadness since ancient times. Since it is not a Chinese tradition to get married in white and with a veil, the white dress "works" only for beautiful photos.

There is another interesting feature in the choice of the bride's attire. It is believed that the more the bride changes outfits at the wedding, the wealthier her groom and the more prosperous the family life of the young will be. As a rule, the outfit is changed 3 times (white, then orange, yellow or pink and then red), but it happens more often. In modern China, outfits are rented, preferring to spend money on more important family life values. Although it is the red dress, embroidered with traditional ornaments, often adorned with pearls, that brides buy and keep as a family heirloom. The red color symbolizes well-being, which is very important for the people of China.

The Chinese believe and honor numerology, so they carefully guess the date of the wedding and the celebration (as a rule, this happens far from one day or even a month). All dates ending in 4, and especially 44, 14, do not bode well for the newlyweds, because the four in Chinese is consonant with the word "death". But not only numerology determines the date of the wedding. Chinese people also check their traditional horoscope, for example, getting married in the year of the Dragon is one of the best options in almost all respects. Therefore, choosing the date of registration and celebration is not an easy task.

It is very important for the groom to show his status, since in China there are several million fewer women than men, serious battles often flare up for potential brides, which naturally affects the wedding culture. The groom must pay a kind of kalym for the bride, her jewelry, dresses, wedding procession. Wedding expenses often fall on the shoulders of the whole family of a young man, because it is also important for parents to marry their son. Fact of the present: there is a big shortage of brides in China.

Marriage registration takes place in a state institution, the young promise the state to honor family values ​​​​and live in peace and harmony. An oath of love and fidelity is more like a party's promise to uphold the laws.

Today, the celebration ceremony itself is often held in hotels, of which there are a lot in China for every taste and budget, conference rooms and, of course, in restaurants. They order photo and video shooting, the Chinese analogue of the toastmaster, who will entertain the guests. A banquet is also a banquet in China. But there are still significant differences.

For example, gifts. In China, it is customary to give newlyweds red envelopes with money - hong bao. Before the start of the banquet, the newlyweds greet the guests, accept congratulations and hong bao, and only then the guests take their seats at the round tables. Since it is not customary to give gifts in the literal sense of the word at modern Chinese weddings, and the wedding expenses are very high, the spouses try to invite as many people as possible, because everyone will bring hong bao.

Also interesting is the tradition of the groom to drink with each table to the bottom. And the Chinese invite a lot of guests, far over a hundred. If the groom is already physically unable to continue to “celebrate” with each table, then the next of kin, for example, brothers, drink to the bottom for him, but I was a witness when the groom’s sister, a fragile Chinese woman, “drank up” for the health of the young, I was sincerely sorry for her even more than the groom.


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