Psychology of a man 60 years old young woman. Happy women who are much younger than their men
Most of us perceive the age of 60 as a milestone, after which a full life ends. It seems that people who have crossed it lose intimacy and understanding with a loved one, motivation for development and joy from former hobbies disappear, and besides, chronic diseases overcome. In general, life after 60 is steadily declining.
But it's not like that at all! Life after 60 is in no way inferior to life at 40 or 50 years old. Of course, no one questions the carefree enthusiasm and optimism of twenty-year-old young people who are hatching grandiose plans for life, but you should not think that it all ends by the age of sixty.
Many scientific studies and sociological surveys lead to unexpected conclusions, namely, people over the age of 60 perceive the world around them more positively. At this age, a person's life is stable and measured, he is confident in himself, he has no fears for himself and his future. In addition, a person over 60 years of age is more stress-resistant and has excellent control over his own emotions, which is undoubtedly an advantage over younger people.
Add to this the fact that people over 60 are better at managing their own time, which means they have much more time to relax and do things that really bring pleasure. For example, it allows you to devote yourself to a hobby for which there was not enough time before, to fulfill an old dream, and in general, to look more creatively at the opportunities that life gives.
Youth gives us enthusiasm and energy, which, as it seems, is enough for 100 years to come. However, over the years, the fuse gradually fades away. But is it worth worrying about? Now you don't have to sacrifice yourself to get up early in the morning and sit in the office until midnight. There comes a period in your life when you can feel the true taste of life, postponing things for later.
All this, of course, allows us to perceive the 60-year milestone more positively. And if you still do not feel this, it is only because too many prejudices associated with your age have taken root in your head. We will talk about them in this article.
10 things to stop doing after 60
1. Diet
You turned 60, and you are still looking for the right diet on the Internet to lose a couple of pounds? Drop this idea. First of all, you must understand that at your age, diets simply do not work!
After 50 years in the body of men and women there is a decrease in the production of hormones, which inevitably leads to weight gain. But if you have been eating right before and have not allowed yourself to get fat, this failure will not cause you any extra trouble. At most, you will gain 5-7 extra pounds, which is considered the norm for the age of “over 60”.
If you have previously eaten improperly, allowed yourself fast food and abused sweets, there is no doubt that diets have not helped you much before. So is it worth torturing your body now? Attempts to deny yourself your favorite food and starve do not lead to positive results, and in the long run, all the more, they will play a cruel joke with you and add a dozen extra pounds!
Don't forget about peace of mind. From unsuccessful attempts to lose weight with the help of diets, your mood will deteriorate, which will invariably affect your well-being and quality of life.
2. Paint over gray hair
Noticing the gray strands, women, and sometimes men, begin to think about how to hide this clear sign of approaching old age. But this is self-deception! Trying to hide gray hair looks ridiculous, because age makes itself felt in many other ways, including wrinkles and discoloration of the skin.
But the point is not even that painting over gray hair will not allow you to hide your age. The whole point is that you just can’t come to terms with changes in your own appearance, don’t love yourself the way you are here and now. And this is a sign of disharmony, which prevents you from being liberated and getting real pleasure from life.
That is why do not deny yourself the pleasure of dyeing your hair when you want to change your appearance and change your image, but you should definitely not hide gray hair on purpose and worry about the appearance of new gray curls.
3. Postpone important things for later
We have already mentioned that after 50 years there comes a period when you have time and opportunities to fulfill your old dream and do what you are really interested in. Now is the time when you can make your dream come true. So, don't put it off until later!
Perhaps you dreamed of visiting one of the distant countries? Maybe you have always wanted to become a farmer, learn a foreign language or build a cottage? Perhaps you dreamed of enrolling in dance courses or traveling around the world on a bicycle?
Now that your kids are grown up and you have a stable job, there is every reason to devote your life to your loved ones and do what you really always gravitated towards.
And even if you have a job and you can’t devote the whole day to yourself, be sure to carve out 1-2 hours exclusively for your own hobby. Do not hesitate, your life will only become brighter and happier from this.
4. Be ashamed of your mistakes
There is a prejudice inside many of us that a person at the age of 60 is ashamed to show his ignorance, it is inconvenient to ask others for advice, and even more so to make mistakes that others can notice. But in fact, this is nothing more than prejudice.
A person cannot know absolutely everything, and therefore it is completely normal to be ashamed of some questions in those areas in which you absolutely do not understand. Even if you are asking for advice from a person who is much younger than you. Moreover, the fact that you ask questions while mastering a computer, newfangled gadgets or a modern car indicates that you are willing to keep up with the times and constantly develop. And it cannot cause other emotions except admiration!
Moreover, when you are over 60, you can safely tell others about the mistakes, mistakes and delusions that you encountered when you were young. There is nothing shameful in this, because it was only after passing through these obstacles that you became who you are now. Is it worth it to be embarrassed? Tell it with a smile, because the ability to self-irony is an important quality for a person who is liberated and free from prejudice.
The appearance of grandchildren is a golden time for grandparents. I want to be closer to my own kids, spend more time with them, show them the world around them in the brightest colors and give them a happy childhood. Next to your grandchildren, you yourself become much younger.
All this is true, but with one caveat. Don't dedicate your life to your grandchildren. You should have time to look after the baby and play with him, but at the same time you should not forget your own desires and aspirations. A happy family is one in which you are supported in the realization of your aspirations.
Finally, practice shows that grandparents who occasionally help their children to look after their grandchildren, but at the same time are busy with their own development, receive, in the end, more gratitude than those who give their grandchildren all of themselves and all their time.
6. Repeat the past
By the age of 60, you have already accumulated enough experience and knowledge to perform the usual work “on the machine”. But there is not much to be proud of here. The fact is that neural connections in the brain are not restored by themselves - the brain needs constant stimulation, and for this it is necessary to set new tasks for it as often as possible.
To do this is quite simple. If you are used to driving or going to work on a certain route, change it, let your brain find a new optimal path. If you've been breaststroke all your life, learn a new style of swimming.
In fact, it is not so important what exactly you puzzle your brain with, it is important that new tasks are set before it, with which it will successfully cope. In this regard, learn something new that you have never done before. Remember, keeping your brain active after 60 is just as important as staying physically active.
7. Worry about what others think
By the age of 60, it's time to stop paying attention to what they say behind your back. You have already lived long enough to understand that all these gossip and gossip only affect the one who pays attention to them. You have already formed your own vision of the world, your own views on fashion and hobbies, and therefore worrying about whispering behind your back, and even more so worrying that your behavior will be condemned, is at least stupid.
After sixty years, there comes a special time - the time of emancipation, when it should not matter at all to you what people will say. Do you want to wear a mini skirt? Would you like to go to a nightclub and "break away" as in your youth? Or maybe you are still embarrassed to remind someone of this promise or unreturned money? Allow yourself whatever you really desire and be honest about what you really care about! Believe me, understanding this makes life a lot easier.
At the age of 20, it seemed to you that after 50, life ends. But here you are sixty, and you are still fresh, cheerful and full of the craziest ideas! So is it worth it to be sad about those years when you were young? Let you have a little more today, even if senile wrinkles have already appeared on your face, this is not at all a reason to complain about fate.
You have many years of happy and incredibly interesting life ahead of you, which you have the right to dispose of as you want. And, if you figure it out, a much better, more conscious, and therefore happier life awaits you! You have become bolder, more experienced, more liberated, you have something to be proud of and you still have many unrealized ideas ahead of you. So tell the world: "I'm still hoo!". And boldly step forward, without sadness and regret.
Do you think it is impossible to meet a soul mate after sixty? Completely wrong! Now you have become more experienced, including in communicating with the opposite sex. You cannot be embarrassed as you once were at the age of 16, and at the same time you have become more courageous to get acquainted with a woman you like or an imposing man.
In addition, after 60 years, you are no longer looking for a life partner with an eye on children. You have become self-sufficient, you know exactly what your soulmate should be in everyday life and in intimate life. All this greatly facilitates the search. And there is no need to think that by the age of fifty, a long time ago, all the best women and men were “taken apart”. Brad Pitt is 55 and recently divorced again. Here you are, believe, and do not despair, if you have not yet met a person who is close in spirit. Somewhere he is also looking for you!
10. Say to yourself: "It's impossible!"
Some people, having reached the age of sixty, give up, believing that if they did not achieve something in their youth, then at the age of 60 it is not worth even dreaming about it. And you break this stereotype!
Try to think in terms of the impossible. All successful people have achieved their goal precisely because they did not doubt their success, no matter how incredible the goal set before them seemed. So why should you be afraid to fulfill your desires?
Perseverance and diligence help to reach any heights, regardless of age and position. If you lacked the determination to take this step when you were young, do it now! In the end, you have absolutely nothing to lose, and you can gain a lot!
Vladimir Yakovlev wrote the book "The Age of Happiness", in which he spoke about older people and how to live better after fifty than before. You can watch an interview with Vladimir Yakovlev in this video.
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A wise man once said that love has three ages: the first love is childish, the second is adult and mature, the third love is the last... Each of them must be met on your life path in order to gain experience for the development of the soul.
Why is an emotionally mature person attracted only to relationships filled with meaning, and not to naked emotions and passions? Who decided for everyone and imposed a template that love is a young thing that does not exist for older people?
Love has no boundaries and does not recognize the framework imposed by society, especially age. Emotions do not disappear after 60 (we will draw a conditional line of old age at this mark) - they are simply expressed a little differently, on a subtle spiritual level. It has been proven that such cohesion of the couple even helps to overcome illnesses more easily.
Have you ever watched elderly couples walking in the park? This is a special picture that evokes tenderness and warmth in the heart. After all, everyone deserves to meet the sunset of life with a person close in spirit.
Many people think that life is over. But life goes on - always and everywhere!
Who said that passions boil only in 20-year-olds? A half can be found at any age. And the incredibly hackneyed, but still true phrase of the classic: “All ages are submissive to love” is confirmed by numerous examples. Life throws up scenarios like this all the time!A couple of years ago, I was lucky enough to visit the places where many children send their elderly parents to live out their lives - two geriatric institutions that used to be called much more simply - nursing homes. I was not mistaken with the word “lucky” at all - there I met several strong couples, after talking with whom I just flew! At that time, I had not even thought not only about marriage, but also about serious relationships in general, so it seemed to me that the veil of some unknown world opened up before me, in which people fall in love and create unions without hesitation, without calculations, just listening to your inner voice. And I firmly believed that you can find your soul mate, if not at 25-30, then at least at 60-70 years old. Better late than never, right? Although I'm glad that the half still appeared in my life earlier.
“Practically everyone, getting here, thinks that life is over. They lower their hands, they mope. But life goes on - always and everywhere! It's hard to guess that this is a quote from the social workers' story about the geriatric boarding house. Among the two hundred residents of the nursing home, I met four couples. All of them lived in a civil marriage, for a long time not attaching importance to formalities such as official registration of marriage. Everything is simpler there: they fell in love with each other, decided to get together - they went to the director with a request to allocate a separate room. Sometimes you have to wait a couple of years for a free room, but is this a time for love? The last time the boarding house workers saw an official wedding was a long time ago, about 7 years ago. Then the couple signed under 70.
Blush with love even after 60
One of the most colorful couples were Mikhail Savelievich and Tatyana Mikhailovna. At the age of 67, Mikhail Savelyevich seems to have just finished playing KVN - he won’t leave the room without jokes and won’t go to the dining room. Tatyana Mikhailovna was terribly embarrassed by the attention: she lowered her eyes, blushed, smiled slyly - neither give nor take, as if she had fallen in love for the first time in her life! And after all already 62 years, instead of 16 years. Mikhail Savelyevich has two children and three grandchildren. “My sons are improving the demographic situation quite well,” the pensioner laughed. But the temperamental grandfather and sons bypassed, quickly winning the heart of the new tenant of the boarding house. As soon as I looked around, I immediately understood: they would be together. Although before that he lived in a boarding house for 7 years and did not look forward to meeting fate in his declining years in such a place. “I saw her, she saw me, and something was irresistibly drawn to each other. You know how it happens,” the mischievous man winked. I then kindly envied.To convince passion as a woman he likes of the seriousness of his intentions, Mikhail Savelyevich remembered what a candy-bouquet period is. He gave flowers and decided to pave the way to the heart traditionally, through the stomach - he secretly wore sweets to the lady of the heart. Now they do not get enough of each other. It happens that Mikhail Savelyevich will become jealous of his common-law wife, or she will chat with other grandmothers. Emotions are not hidden, but they are not going to officially register a marriage.
It turned out to be love at first sight. She did not ask how old she was, how many marriages and grandchildren she had. Sometimes love waits for many years before it comes.
Well, no different from 18-year-olds! Is that a cobweb of wrinkles around the eyes
You can meet your soul mate at retirement age, even if life has brought you to one place for a very short time. The geriatric hospital, where seniors stay for only 24 days, also boasts lonely heart unions. They meet, they talk, they fall in love. “We immediately see when people like each other: women begin to do their hair, men’s posture straightens out. Youth in front of your eyes! They can take the handles, ”said the head of the hospital, Oksana Kovalevskaya, with a smile.One of the most touching couples became the favorites of the whole team - Maria Vasilievna and Anatoly Mikhailovich At the time of our acquaintance with them, they had been together for 13 years. Both went to the 78th year. “But we are still hoo! And, dying, we will laugh, ”the husband exclaimed. But what can I say if a couple met ... at a disco. Future lovers danced (then still "only" 65-year-olds) at dances for those over 40. They met for a year - they tested their feelings. The people around were so accustomed to an inseparable couple that, at the sight of one, they would come up and ask: “Where is your boy / your girlfriend?”. Yes, yes, Anatoly Mikhailovich calls the lady of the heart his girlfriend, and nothing else. Well, no different from 18-year-olds! Only a cobweb of wrinkles around the eyes. And the eyes themselves are shining, no matter how you lower them.
The daughter of the widow Maria Vasilievna immediately gave the go-ahead to a new union, but the ex-wife and son of Anatoly Mikhailovich still sometimes conflict. But the circumstances were of little concern to the lovers. Anatoly about the common-law spouse: "She is my eyes, my support, my everything." When a man’s eyesight fell almost to blindness a few years ago, it was his faithful lover who became his guide, his arms and legs: “Like a calf, she led me. I got angry sometimes. Now I understand: I’ll give everything for her.” As a result, doctors partially restored vision, and the couple's relationship became even warmer. Although, it would seem, where too.
harsh statistics
If even life stories don't convince some skeptics, there are statistics. For example, at the request of the author of the article in the city registry office, they answered that “older weddings”, although infrequent, do occur - up to ten cases a year. In large cities, of course, more. But the age of the couple inspires respect - 60-80 years! Of course, such newlyweds do not arrange pompous ceremonies. But why a magnificent dress and a crowd of guests, if a small miracle has already happened - people have found each other in the boundless ocean of life?From this article you will learn:
What are the main features of communication with the elderly
How aging affects communication with older people
What are the basic rules for communicating with older people that will help to establish contact with them
What not to do when dealing with older people
What are the features of communication with older people with dementia
Most people consider retirement a kind of milestone, after which an active life ends, and a period of quiet withering begins. Old age is approaching, there are fewer opportunities, and one can only remember about a full life. This is far from true. Life after 60 years can be bright, full of communication, eventful. At this age, it becomes possible to devote more time to family, friends, interests and hobbies. The main thing is to want to lead an active lifestyle and not allow yourself to mope.
Is there life after 60?
The modern world is focused on the younger generation. Stereotypes that have developed over the years make people afraid of the approach of old age. Life after 60 seems to many to be more of a problem than a joy. People are overwhelmed by thoughts of impending poverty, the loss of external beauty, the extinction of sexual desires. Questions about the perception of approaching old age are also of concern to scientists.
Having devoted their research to the problems of aging, psychologists insist that life after 60 years can be full, active, eventful. All nightmares about old age are far-fetched. You should not regret the irrevocably gone youth. It is better to accept your real age, find a use for yourself and fill your life with interesting people, deeds and a positive attitude.
The amazing news was announced to the whole world some time ago by the scientific community. Dutch scientists have deciphered the DNA of a woman who lived to be 115 years old. At the same time, both physical strength and clarity of mind were preserved. Scientists have attested that shortly before her death, the woman looked 50 years old. At the age of 113, she was tested for the preservation of mental abilities. The results corresponded to the level of a 65-year-old.
In the genome of the centenarian, scientists discovered the most unique changes that gave reason to assume that it was thanks to them that the woman's body was protected from the aging process and all the transformations associated with it. Amsterdam biologists suggest that the longevity genome is hidden in such rearrangements.
This discovery could change people's understanding of life expectancy. Nature itself has prepared the human body for a full long life after 60 years. Many scientists studying this issue are united by the opinion that the duration of human life should approach 130 years - it is for this period that human resources are calculated. It is unfortunate that the reason for the changes that have occurred in the body of the centenarian is still not clear. There may be the influence of nutrition, ecology, the presence of interest in life, etc. Scientists hope that answers to all questions will be found in the very near future.
What are the benefits of life after 60?
Studies by American scientists have shown that the human brain reaches its full capacity only in old age. Peak of intellectual activity accounts for 50-70 years. People who lead a healthy lifestyle after 60 become wiser, more reasonable. Research by Barbara Stouch led to this sensational conclusion.
By this age, any person has a lot of events that have happened behind his back, which have formed a certain life experience. This makes it easier to navigate in a variety of situations that arise, experience fewer illusions, better understand people and build relationships with them. Special wisdom gives a person the ability to find optimal solutions in difficult circumstances, adapt flexibly to changes and not overreact to minor problems and disappointments. Life after 60 is reasonable and selective. A person himself builds his circle of friends, limiting it and allowing only the one he wants to come to him.
Life after 60 years is less subject to passions, because older people are more emotionally stable. According to University of California professor Dilip Jaist, the brain of a person who has decades of life behind him is less impulsive and more rational.
Life after 60 can be full of business meetings. By this age, a person reaches the maximum level of development both in a career and in public life, where they play an important role, enjoying authority in such areas as politics, business, culture, etc.
Life after 60 is more realistic. People are stricter and more rational in assessing their capabilities and strengths. With age, individuality is honed, the ability to present oneself in the right light. Knowing all his advantages and disadvantages, a person skillfully flaunts something, but tries not to demonstrate something at all.
Life after 60 is seen as a period long-awaited stability. Almost all by this age have a family, children, and some already have grandchildren, a certain social, professional and material standard of living. The period after 60 years is favorable for doing things for which there was not enough time, for new hobbies, communication and travel.
What is the difference between family life after 60 years
A loving couple can live happily ever after and die on the same day only in wonderful children's fairy tales. In reality, everything is completely different. A prosperous and long family life is possible only with the joint desire and creation of the spouses.
The feelings of passion and love that dominate the relationship of people at the beginning of marriage, over the years spent together, are transformed into calmer, but deep and cordial tenderness and affection. Having withstood many trials, these feelings erase all minor problems, emphasizing the importance of mutual respect and understanding. Such an idyll is achieved if, in addition to love, the spouses are connected by common interests and views, and not just family values. For example, a shared passion, love of travel, scientific or social interest, etc. Life after 60 years clearly shows the sincerity of feelings between spouses.
When children grow up, begin to live independently, create their own families and leave their parental home, relationship problems may worsen for older people, as this is a serious stage for them. The success of the spouses in overcoming this crisis moment depends on the way of resolving difficult situations, the level of mutual understanding and the degree of cohesion. Harmony in relationships, respect, multiplied several times over the years of living together, are able to minimize and negate the consequences of any negative trends.
Known two way out. The situation can be resolved:
Constructively, focusing on the personal development of each of the spouses, the emergence of a new joint interest and the area for its implementation, the fulfillment of those desires for which there was not enough time due to concerns about children.
Unconstructive, obsessed with difficulties, fear of loneliness, loss of the meaning of life, feeling of uselessness, disappointment in family values, decreased vitality, complete apathy and emerging health problems.
Is there an intimate life after 60 years
There is an opinion in society that vivid intimate relationships are characteristic only of young and middle-aged people. There are also many who believe that a sexual life after 60 years is optional and wrong. Age is not the reason for the end of an intimate relationship. If a person has not lost physical ability, he should not forbid himself to live fully. The studies of the American biologist and sexologist A.S. Kinsey confirms the presence of sexual interest and desire in older people. Just one-quarter of 60-year-old couples are not intimate. Everyone else has sexual intercourse, but perhaps not as often as before.
An analysis of the sexual activity of men over the age of 60 showed that 80% of them are capable of intimacy. The indicator is no worse for men who have reached 70 years of age - this is 70% of their number. After 80, this figure drops to 25%.
Such statistics confirm that sexual activity does not directly depend on age and persists throughout life if a person monitors his health and does not clog his head with prejudices.
How to Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle After 60
Scientists believe that the ability to save life after 60 years of active and full depends only on ourselves. The genetic or hereditary factor has only about 30% of the influence, the remaining 70% is the attitude of a person to his health and the body as a whole.
A healthy lifestyle after 60 for women and men should include several aspects:
Health control
You should not wait for a noticeable deterioration in well-being to go to the doctor. Make regular visits to the doctor, monitoring your condition. Pay attention to any unexpected problems. For example, pressure has increased, it has become more difficult to breathe, pain in the back or joints is felt - all these are reasons for consulting a specialist. The advantage of early diagnosis is to reduce and prevent the destructive impact of the disease on the body. Try to listen to your well-being.
You rarely meet a person who would be happy to go to the doctors, and even more so would be calm about operations or a long course of treatment. Only this is not a reason to start the course of the disease. Early diagnosis of the disease and timely treatment give high chances for a full recovery. Never think that everything will go away by itself, do not rely on folk methods, but just go to the professionals and clearly follow all the recommendations. And then life after 60 years will sparkle with new colors.
Healthy lifestyle
A healthy lifestyle after 60 for men and women is unthinkable without following certain rules, eliminating bad habits and factors. This will avoid a significant number of diseases. Try to adhere to these postulates at any age:
Watch your weight, keep it normal. If you have a few extra pounds, try to carefully dump them and not gain in the future.
Lead an active lifestyle, try to move more. Daily exercise should become a habit. Find your own activities. It could be walking the dog, going to the cinema, doing a little yard work, or attending a special fitness group for the elderly.
If it is not possible to completely eliminate alcohol, then choose light drinks of good quality. It is better to give up cigarettes altogether.
Try not to overwork. Lead a fairly active lifestyle after 60, but do not overwork, do not drive yourself to work, do everything measuredly.
Sleep is the best medicine. Give him enough time and avoid stressful situations. You should not try to build a life after 60 the same way as when you were 30 years old. Get more rest.
Pay close attention to your diet. You should not overeat, eat fatty, fried, salty, sweet. Products must be natural and dietary.
Remember to be careful. If possible, avoid injuries, be prudent and correctly calculate your strengths and capabilities. Consider your age and take roads, crossings, ice, etc. seriously.
One more important factor influencing life after 60 years should be especially noted - this is mood and state of mind. A pessimistic attitude gives rise to a breakdown, depression and reduces the protective functions of the body. Immunity weakens, and a person becomes easily ill. People who lead an active life are full of inner energy. Good spirits and an optimistic attitude make a person strong and healthy. Don't scare yourself with old age. We do not know how many years are given to whom. Live fully, enjoy every moment, look for the positive in everything and take care of your health as much as possible.
7 tips from psychologists on how to make life after 60 happy
We all would like to see life always only please and bring pleasure. Unfortunately, it is not. There are moments of sorrow, bitterness, melancholy and apathy, which are quite difficult to endure. And every year there are more and more such moments in life, but you should not become discouraged. To make a full life after 60 years, the advice of psychologists is as follows:
1) Do not go in cycles in diseases!
Under no circumstances should you make a hobby out of your ailments. Avoid endless complaints about your health, do not talk only about illnesses, do not go to the clinic unnecessarily, looking for just interlocutors there. This is how the psychological crisis of lack of attention and communication manifests itself. Switch to something useful, provide all possible assistance to the family or others. After all, everyone gets sick, and this should not become the meaning of your life after 60 years.
2) Treat your age with optimism!
It is possible to make life after 60 bright, full of impressions and excellent mood only if you are calm about changes in your appearance, are ready to adjust your life plans and make more realistic wishes. You will be much more comfortable starting this new stage not with memories and longing for the past, but with setting a real goal and developing a path to achieve it.
Take as an example a study by Yale University sociologist Becky Levy, which she conducted for 30 years, studying the approach of old age in 440 volunteers. After selecting the participants in the experiment, she divided them into two groups. The first included those who absolutely calmly perceived the coming changes, considering it a natural life process. The second group consisted of participants who fear the aging of their body.
The results only confirmed the incredible power of optimism. Participants of the first group lived longer on average by 7-8 years. The life expectancy of those who also gave up bad habits, devoted time to sports and healthy eating, increased by more than 10 years. Optimistically minded people who take their years as wealth, not a burden, are less prone to cardiovascular disease, and recover more easily and quickly.
3) Let go of old ideas.
Often people limit themselves in everything under the influence of stereotypes. There is no point in such containment, it only spoils life after 60 years. There is no need to become like an unoccupied old wreck, constantly sitting on a bench and discussing the latest gossip. Let yourself look different - elegant, in demand and happy. In your new life after 60, remove the negativity, even from your own statements. Instead of "It's too late for me to start something", say "I have the experience, wisdom and time to devote all this to a new hobby." Or, “When I retire, life ends,” replace it with: “With the advent of retirement, I have much more time for my family and my interests.” Try to think in a positive way and enjoy every moment of your life after 60 years.
4) Expand your horizons!
Stop living in stereotypes! Imagine what you would like to do. Make a 25 Wish List. Think about what you didn't have time for? What haven't you gotten to yet? Perhaps you dreamed of spending more time sewing, knitting, growing indoor flowers, decorating your home or yard, etc. Set your priorities and get started! Having occupied yourself with an interesting or favorite thing and positive emotions, you will use your free time to good use and understand how fulfilling life can be after 60 years.
It is clear that it is quite difficult to immediately adjust to a completely different rhythm. Start with small changes. Dedicate every day to something. For example, on Bake Day, make pies and invite family or friends over for tea. On Walk Day, go to the park or the Philharmonic. Such moments will fill your life with new desires and opportunities, communication and diversity. They will teach you to devote maximum time to yourself, and not to work or the money that paid for it.
5) Be an example!
Don't let depression in your life! Try to constantly strive for something. Remember that you are an example for your loved ones, do not allow yourself to become limp and turn into a sloppy person. Be sure that life after 60 is just as interesting and fulfilling, and share that confidence with your friends and family. In an effort to be an example, you will get used to a new role and will no longer be afraid of the future, regretting the past. If it is difficult to cheer up and put your thoughts in order on your own, then you should not hesitate to seek help from a professional psychologist.
6) Do not interfere in someone else's life.
There are cases when people, having a sufficient amount of free time and doing nothing, look for something to do in arranging the life of their children, actively interfering in their personal lives, giving advice and recommendations, which ultimately lead to discord. If you have something to professionally teach the younger generation to pass on your indisputable experience, blog on the Internet. Post useful life hacks, tips, subtleties and nuances of what you know first-class. In this you can find for yourself an interesting occupation, enthusiastic communication and useful development.
7) Communicate more!
Communication plays an important role in the lives of people of all ages. It is very difficult for a person who was in a whirlpool of events to rebuild and start living differently after 60 years. Try to communicate more, do not withdraw into yourself, make acquaintances, visit public places and clubs of interest. A common hobby unites people very much and makes life brighter and more diverse.
8) Be confident!
Studies of the adaptation of older people to life after 60, conducted by domestic and foreign psychologists, confirmed their opinion that those who have high self-esteem get used to the new rhythm most quickly and successfully. Faith in themselves and their strengths helps them not to think about old age and death, but to live, filling each day with pleasant worries as much as possible. Try to love yourself even more. Do not scold if you are too lazy to do something, please yourself with new clothes or desired acquisitions, communicate only with people you like, develop and fill your life with positive.
10 Vivid Examples That Life After 60 Is Just Beginning
A full life can be after 60 years. This is confirmed by the examples of Vladimir Yakovlev, who published an amazing series of books on this issue. The opinion that for all people of retirement age the quality of life decreases, interests disappear, desires land, and the like, completely destroy the examples of the next section. A person's personal desire is the best motivation for an active life even after 60 years.
1. Greta Pontarelli, 64
Greta started pole dancing only a couple of years ago. But already now she surprises the audience with her plasticity, the complexity of the numbers and the originality of the costumes. It all started not too rosy when the terrible diagnosis “Osteoporosis is progressive and destroys bone tissue” was made. The recommendations of the doctors that it is necessary to lift weights, Greta understood in her own way and decided to lift herself.
Thanks to many hours of daily training, the pain that tormented the back went away, the body became flexible and toned. Greta found an interesting occupation for herself, which captured all her thoughts and free time. Her example is inspired by a large number of people who, after 60 years, have decided to lead an active lifestyle, and not sit on a bench.
2. Duan Jinfu, 76 years old
Half a century of work in the glass industry had seriously damaged Duan's health, clogging his lungs with glass dust and making his body completely inflexible and unruly. Duan had almost come to terms with the fate of a sick old man when, walking in the park, he accidentally found himself next to older people who were doing gymnastics. The plasticity of their bodies filled his mind with an uncontrollable desire to begin the exercises.
He was fascinated by the Taoist practice, which helps to restore the body's flexibility and prevent its aging. Having joined the group he saw in the park, Duan achieved good success, began to improve his body, began to communicate with new friends and lead a fully active lifestyle.
3. Ruth Flowers, 75
Ruth has always been a music lover, loved all kinds of music and even sang in the church choir. She lived a quiet measured life as a married woman for over 40 years until her husband died and she became a widow. Heartbroken, 68-year-old Ruth Flowers resigned herself to her fate and quietly faded away among the memories. Once, after a year, a woman tried to enter an entertainment club to celebrate her grandson's birthday, but the guard standing at the entrance did not let her through, hinting at her advanced age. Once at the party, Ruth was overwhelmed by the music and colorful lights. She thought that she could play for young people at such events, and gave this idea to her grandson. He introduced her to a French producer who trained Ruth and styled her. So the DJ "Mami Rock" appeared. Until the last days, Ruth was surrounded by young people, admired and said: “ I have no desire to retire. Well, until I drop dead, of course. I prefer to end my days noisily than to drag out an senile existence". Everyone is the blacksmith of his own happiness, the main thing is to want and believe in yourself.
4. Yvonne Dawlen, 88 years old
Ice skating for Yvonne is a life's work. Already in old age, she got into a car accident, received a serious concussion and the doctors sentenced her to permanently remove her skates and forget about sports. However, the love of ice was stronger than the disease. Yvonne put on her skates again, began to train and even took part in competitions. Her words: “When I’m in a bad mood, I look at my peers with their oxygen bags, put on my skates and smile.” This is an example of willpower, love and dedication.
The pair became famous on Pat's 80th birthday, when he made 80 parachute jumps in over six hours. But travel remains the favorite pastime of the spouses. They love to move from country to country without stopping for a minute, and each time, plunging into a new culture, they replenish their spiritual world with ever greater values and impressions. They are not attracted to well-known places. The couple loves exploring unexplored corners of different countries.
6. Fauja Singh, over 100 years old.
Fauja Singh is 104 years old. He was running in his youth, but life forced him to give up this hobby and concentrate on agriculture. Having survived the terrible pain of losing loved ones, Fauja decided that running was the best cure for depression and old age. He took up the sport again. Now Fauja says that he runs 20 miles easily, and the last six he runs and talks with God.
This is the oldest record holder of the London Marathon, overcoming it in 5.4 hours. An incredible athletic spirit and good physical shape give him the opportunity to run in a London park at that age.
7. Montserrat Mecho, 81 years old.
More than anything, Montserrat appreciates the feeling of happiness that he experiences when he makes a parachute jump. Having jumped for the first time at almost 50 years old, she was absolutely not afraid and even performed acrobatic movements. And even in old age, he considers free fall happiness.
8. Alexander Rosenthal, 98 years old.
Alexander began skiing while still at the school. Then, during the war, only thanks to skiing he survived when he fell ill with typhus. Alexander Iosifovich came up with his own system of skiing, descending from the artificial slopes of Moscow three times a week. The very overcoming of the way to the outskirts of the city by public transport is already a feat for an elderly person. But skiing is happiness for Alexander Rosenthal, who said: “The greatest pleasure is life itself. Alpine skiing is the second.
9. Nora Breyer, 100 years old
The world learned about Nora Brier when she celebrated her 100th birthday by flying a glider and performing a dead loop. One of Nora's daughters is a pilot, and it was she who prepared such an unusual gift for her mother. Nora was very happy with such a surprise, as she was used to extreme sports. She celebrated her 80th birthday by flying in a hot air balloon, and on her 95th birthday she rode a Harley tricycle.
10. Lloyd Kahn, 80 years old.
Lloyd got into skateboarding when he was already 65. He does not perform any tricks, does not ride like teenagers, but remains in great sports shape. For him, a skateboard is not an extreme sport, but a way to enjoy riding along the long streets of a seaside town. Lloyd has his own publishing house, where he prints books about ecology and runs a self-sufficient economy, providing himself with everything he needs.
In our boarding houses we are ready to offer only the best:
Round-the-clock care for the elderly by professional nurses (all staff are citizens of the Russian Federation).
5 meals a day full and diet.
1-2-3-seater placement (for recumbent specialized comfortable beds).
Daily leisure (games, books, crossword puzzles, walks).
Individual work of psychologists: art therapy, music lessons, modeling.
Weekly examination by specialized doctors.
Comfortable and safe conditions (comfortable country houses, beautiful nature, clean air).
At any time of the day or night, the elderly will always come to the rescue, no matter what problem worries them. In this house, all relatives and friends. An atmosphere of love and friendship reigns here.
All the most relevant information in the article on the topic: "A man at the age of 60, the psychology of behavior." We have compiled a complete description of all your problems.
Male psychology- this is one of the most entertaining topics that occupies the fragile minds of both young girls and not very young ladies. A huge mass of representatives of the female part of the population got used to the idea that the stronger sex is famous for its primitiveness. In other words, the young ladies are convinced that male psychology is a trivial and simple thing, since it comes down to three lusts: food, intimacy and sleep. This is the essence of the main centuries-old delusion of almost all the daughters of Eve. In fact, periodically all representatives of the male half, as well as other living individuals, need to satisfy only the three above needs. However, the statement that the brain of the strong half is only capable of producing basic needs is a priori wrong. Women are accustomed to belittling the psychological component of the male part of the population. But it is precisely in the knowledge of all the hidden aspects of the soul of the sons of Adam, in the awareness of their male psychology, that the strength of the female sex lies.
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Male psychology in love and relationships
Today it will not be a secret to anyone that in relationships, male and female psychology is different, like heaven and earth. For most ladies, the feelings of the stronger sex remain the most difficult mystery. Probably, many have heard the common saying that ladies and gentlemen are two completely different biological subspecies. Although this phrase should be regarded as a joke, there is some truth in it. Men are less sensitive on a physiological level and emotionally.
In the female environment, it is customary to think that intimacy controls the life of men, but such an understanding of the psychology of the strong half is far from the truth. Men also strive for love, but they express their own desires differently than women. As a result of the prevailing myths in the male circle and the female community, stereotypes are born that claim that male psychology in love is reduced to primitive instincts. In turn, the sons of Adam believe that young charmers and older ladies need only one thing from gentlemen - money. But in fact, women need a confident and strong partner as they choose the father of their future children. Unfortunately, the confidence and strength of character in men is affected by the presence or absence of significant capital.
The statement about the emotional coldness of the stronger sex is also unfair. Recent studies have shown that romantic films are much more appealing to men than women. It's just that the representatives of the courageous part of the population do not have the courage to admit their own sentimentality.
The sons of Adam always remember the day they met their beloved, remember all the details of the first rendezvous and for a long time save various trifles and souvenirs dear to the heart. In addition, opinion polls have confirmed that gentlemen love to hear affectionate words addressed to them, various gentle “nonsense”, love to be called good-natured nicknames. They need touching-sentimental touches often much more than intimacy. Therefore, male thick-skinnedness and coldness is another legend invented by offended females. Men are only outwardly constrained in the manifestation of their own feelings, because they are afraid to seem overly sentimental and henpecked. They strive to match the image of alpha males, "real" men who do not know what romance, tenderness and caring are. Moreover, what characteristics this image has is known only to men.
If you ask the representatives of the strong half a question about what attracts them to the opposite sex, then 80% will answer a lie. They will say that they are attracted by the inner world of charmers and the ability to cook deliciously. In fact, at first, the male gender pays attention to the appearance and figure of the chosen one, and in the future, if they are satisfied with the “texture” and “exterior” of the young lady, they will honor their inner world with attention. You need to remember this when eating another bun under your favorite TV series. In order for gentlemen to appreciate the beautiful and mysterious female soul, they first need to be interested in a seductive and sophisticated external image.
Male psychology in relation to women is based on the compliance of the chosen one with accepted standards of beauty. Every man on a subconscious level chooses his beloved, based on her external data. And only after some time, when the gentleman is completely subdued by the feminine charm and beauty of the chosen one, he will begin to evaluate her thriftiness and inner world. Therefore, young ladies are advised not to rush on first dates, to reveal to a man all the depth and homeliness of their soul.
How to understand male psychology?
First of all, you need to really want to understand the mysteries and "back streets" of the psychology of men. Some women only verbally seek to understand the strong half, but in fact they absolutely do not care what is happening in the soul of their partners, the main thing is that they satisfy their needs and expectations.
It often happens that a beautiful, sexy, smart young lady suffers from loneliness for several years. And not a bright, ugly ugly woman, happily married. This is due to the fact that many representatives of a strong part of the population have low self-esteem. They are not confident in their own abilities, they believe that they do not reach the level of a chic blonde colleague who has been liked for three years now.
It is from here that the origins of stories about the qualities of a true mistress and a rich inner world come. Of course, this plays an important role in marriage, but not at the first meeting, because a man, inviting a young lady he likes to a restaurant, does not set himself the goal of dragging her to the registry office.
After the line of first dates and falling in love is behind, the period of love begins.
Male psychology in relationships and love is different from the psychology of the stronger sex at the stage of dating. Since the man has already opted for a certain woman, now he faces a new task - he needs to understand whether his chosen one is suitable for the role of wife and mother for his future children. So it is not only female psychology that tends to check men for compliance with their ideal husband. Representatives of the strong half do exactly the same. Therefore, even the most beautiful woman can not count on an engagement ring if she is a born slut who is cold about housekeeping. At the same time, you should not go headlong into everyday issues.
A man who is serious about a woman wants to see his beloved "at the battle parade." Since the male psychology in relation to women is such that gentlemen like not only to receive aesthetic pleasure when looking at the chosen one, but also the partner for them serves as an object of pride and boasting to other "males".
Of course, there is nothing terrible in a worn out favorite dressing gown and a green vegetable mask on the face, but it’s better for the beloved to see such metamorphoses with the chosen one less often. Men are very offended by the weaker sex because, alone with them, the young ladies look like the character of the same name from the fairy tale "Cinderella", and turns into a beautiful princess when she is equipped for work or for a meeting with her friends.
It is because most of both sexes do not understand that there are certain differences in male and female psychology that so many divorces occur.
Male psychology in love is more calm in direction than that of beautiful and ephemeral female creatures. Many women misinterpret men's emotional restraint as callousness. In addition, beauties often sin by evaluating their life partners through the prism of their own personality, not realizing that each human subject has an individual set of qualities and characteristics. After all, often what is good for one, it seems to another "a living hell." Therefore, it is so important to know all the secrets of male psychology and the signs that indicate the presence of a deep feeling.
There is no definite ideal of a woman who would be to the taste of absolutely all men. Some of the representatives of the stronger sex simply go crazy from blondes, another loses his head from red-haired young ladies, one likes rounded hips and an elastic ass, the other likes breasts, starting from the third size. Men are not the same, so they have different preferences. At the same time, numerous surveys have shown that there are three main characteristics that a dream woman must have: femininity, sexuality and kindness. None of the sons of Adam wants to have a "hot-blooded" wives. And the stronger their feminine principle is developed in the daughters of Eve, the more charm and charm they have, and the more attractive they are.
In addition, men prefer girls who are flexible in communication, easily adaptable and cheerful. This is due to the natural egoism and the share of chauvinism (sexism) of men. After all, they are convinced that only a woman should adapt, by virtue of her natural nature.
The real horror in the representatives of the male part of the population is induced by nervous, twitchy, restless women who make a tragedy out of everything. Men are only outwardly unshakable like a rock, but in reality they are very careful about their own peace of mind, so they tend to avoid excessively hysterical ladies. At the same time, some theatricality and a share of hysteria in behavior, on the contrary, attract the strong half. Just don't overdo it.
Signs and secrets of male psychology in love.
The more time a guy tries to devote to a girl, the deeper and more sincere his feelings are. If a man prefers to spend time fishing, in bars with friends or at some meaningless events, and not with a girl, then this indicates his disinterest in a young lady. In this case, most ladies make a typical mistake, starting to call and impose communication with themselves, which pushes the man they like even further. When representatives of the stronger half experience sincere feelings for the opposite sex, they try to devote a lot of time to ladies dear to their hearts, because they are drawn to the object of love. The exception is work. There is no need to suspect a man of dislike if he spends most of his time at work. He does it for the woman he loves.
The male psychology of gestures can also tell about the presence of deep affection. To understand a loved one, it is not necessary to memorize the language of gestures and body, you need to learn to perceive all his actions in a complex. Therefore, to find out whether the gentleman loves or not, it is recommended to analyze the model of his behavior. If a man pays the lion's share of attention to the chosen one, then he is really in love. And this can be expressed in the desire to help, the desire to bring bags, take them home, give outerwear, in constant touching the object of love.
Psychology of male gestures.
In a conversation, the stronger sex uses fewer gestures than the weaker half. And since it is far from always possible to trust men's words, this fact greatly facilitates the task of understanding male psychology for women.
So, if a male interlocutor constantly looks into the eyes of a lady, periodically looking at her lips, then this indicates his favorable disposition towards the young lady and her interest.
The man's gaze is open, he looks at the woman's face, occasionally glancing below. It also speaks of his interest in the lady. The open mouth of the gentleman is also considered a positive sign.
If a man, walking next to a young lady, puts his hand on her shoulder or back, then he values her.
The serious attitude of the sons of Adam towards the ladies is evidenced by their desire to share their “adult toys”. For example, they allow a woman to drive their car, which they cherish like the apple of their eye, or let them play on a tablet.
Any quarrel also speaks of the presence of feelings in a man, since he will quarrel with a woman only if he has the intention to live with her in the future. If in the midst of arguing, when a girl seeks to sort things out with her chosen one, he leaves, then this is a significant sign of a lack of interest in the young lady.
If the partner moved from discussions about a joint tomorrow to concrete actions, then he decided to create the future together. Moreover, such actions can be minor, for example, the purchase of an electric kettle or the repair of a tap.
Another important sign of deep feelings in a man is his consent to conduct household activities together. This is how the stronger sex works - cooking dinner together or cleaning the apartment means a lot to them. And if the chosen one went to accomplish the “feat” for the sake of his beloved, removing the dirty dishes behind him or throwing his socks not under the bed, but into the laundry basket, then this indicates his one hundred percent readiness to tie the knot.
This is how male psychology looks like in a relationship based on a deep feeling for a girl.
And, despite the fact that male and female psychology at first glance is so different, but a wise woman who wants to keep her lover by her side will take into account all the above features of the mysterious male soul.
Male psychology in relation to women
Knowing the peculiarities of male psychology in relation to women, it is possible to reduce the number of interpersonal conflicts by 30%. The most important feature of the strong half, with which beautiful women cannot come to terms, is the silence of men when a serious problem arises or a conflict is brewing. Most ladies believe that if the chosen one is silent, then, therefore, he is offended or angry. In fact, the man is not offended or even angry, but simply thinks. Unfortunately, men are not Caesars, so they do not know how to do two things at the same time. That is why he is silent when he thinks.
The next feature of male psychology in relation to women is an almost indifferent attitude to their emotions and feelings. It is believed that it is more common for women to feel, and for the sons of Adam to act. In addition, by nature, gentlemen are more silent. Usually their speech is slower than that of the fair sex. Therefore, if you chat non-stop at the usual pace for women, then the man will not absorb most of the information. For the stronger sex, the visible is much more important than the audible. This is the main difference between male and female psychology. Also, men are straightforward, so they do not understand "transparent" hints.
It should not be expected from the male chosen one that he will instantly understand everything when he sees the offended “pug” of his beloved or her tense posture. Voice intonations are also not the best advisers of men. Therefore, resentment should not be demonstrated, but spoken out.
The next feature that needs to be taken into account is the difference in the perception of the stronger sex and the fair half. Feminy are more attentive to details, and the sons of Adam - evaluate the situation as a whole. In other words, for men, the overall impression is more important than the small details that make it up.
Representatives of the stronger sex are known for their invariable spirit of competition, which manifests itself exclusively among their own kind. That is why men's gatherings are very important for them. Communication in a circle of men helps the strong half to achieve psychological comfort and balance.
The peculiarities of the psychology of the sons of Adam greatly influence their value orientations, priorities, instincts and hobbies. Men tend to show great interest in power, productive activity, achieving goals, and logic.
By nature, the male sex is much stronger and more resilient than the female. Men are hunters. They need to "hunt", catch up, fight, conquer and enjoy the results of their victories. Therefore, one of the key tasks of the representatives of the male part of the population has long been the conquest of women.
The interest of gentlemen in ladies will be present as long as there is a mystery in the young lady. While a man has to win a chosen one, interest and affection live in his heart. When the riddle is solved, and the woman belongs entirely to the partner, interest begins to dry up gradually. Therefore, in order for love for a companion to exist forever in a man's heart, women are advised to keep the mystery throughout their lives.
Also, there is no need to be under the illusion that men like homemade "clouds". There is a certain category of men who prefer to marry precisely the so-called domestic girls who love to cook, do excellent housework, quiet and submissive. Only now the husbands of such young ladies will not love.
They choose them solely out of selfish interest, because they love home comfort, and they will love young, active, daring and independent.
The strong half like self-sufficient and self-confident ladies. For a man, independent and active ladies who have their own interests and friends have an attraction. Men like it when a woman combines tenderness and confidence, intelligence and care, femininity and independence.
The strong half does not like various manipulations by the weaker sex. They also don't want to play guessing game. They do not want to unravel the signs of the chosen one, to read her thoughts. Men dream of calm and simple relationships.
Psychology of male infidelity
Most psychologists are convinced that beautiful women themselves provoke the stronger sex to infidelity. Through the efforts of previous generations of Eve's daughters, intimacy was elevated to the rank of a prize, which is awarded to a man for "correct" behavior. From this we can conclude that the ladies have turned intimacy into a bargaining chip, with which they pay for "good" male deeds, or deprive the faithful of bed love for their "bad" behavior. Women only sought to manipulate the stronger half, receiving the so-called "reward" for bed comforts. But in the end, they personally deprived themselves of the joys of an intimate life, pushing the men to escape "to the left."
Men are experimenters by nature, who eventually get bored with life and there is a desire to diversify their own existence.
The stronger sex is very flattered by the attention from the opposite sex. And spouses are not a hindrance. Since with the course of a joint life, the spouses get used to each other, as a result of which they spoil each other less and less. Therefore, a bit of attention and admiration from an outside lady can make a man lose his head.
Some sons of Adam simply do not think of life without risk. It is the love to take risks that pushes this category of males to infidelity, since tricks on the side are always associated with a bit of danger.
In addition, the possession of several ladies at the same time significantly increases male self-esteem and amuses pride. This is especially true for middle-aged gentlemen, aging ladies' men, who are acutely aware that time is running out. Therefore, they strive by any means to prove to themselves and their environment that young ladies are still interested in them.
Another reason that pushes the stronger sex to adultery is the need to feel long-forgotten feelings of passion, love and tenderness. Another woman is able to rekindle the long-forgotten fire of love in a man's heart, revive former youth and vivid sensations, which will allow a man to escape from the everyday routine of family life.
How to understand the male psychology of change?
To this end, it is necessary to highlight the main reasons that provoke the strong half to adultery:
The man was brought up in a family where such behavior was taken as the norm, in other words, his moral values allow betrayal;
In the circle of communication of the spouse, the presence of a mistress is "a matter of prestige";
The wife refuses intimacy to a man;
The relationship of the spouses collapsed, passion and tenderness left them.
A man at 60 is his psychology. A lover at this age is perplexing for some, especially if he has a very young girl in his mistresses.
What drives a man who at 60 suddenly remembers that he is still a man? It's one thing if it's a widower. He is used to the family, he wants care and is looking for a replacement for his wife. This can be understood. Although this is selfishness, no one condemns this.
But we often hear about our "stars" who endlessly change their wives for younger ones. Such marriages do not last long, because the wife loses her shape and is replaced by a younger girl.
Do men really assert themselves at their expense? Why does the joke: “I change one 40-year-old wife for 2 to 20” no longer seem funny?
At the age of 30, a man seeks stability, at 40 he begins to “look to the left”, and at 50-60 he is already prone to extravagance. Doctors conditionally divide the life of any man into several periods, the change of which is associated with a crisis and subsequent personality changes. There are three such turning points in a man's life, although we must make a reservation: these age limits are rather arbitrary. For some, withdrawal may occur earlier than the fateful date, for others - much later. The last "difficult age" of a man is 55 - 60 years.
WHAT IS A WIFE DOING?
At 30, a man is looking for stability both in his career and, most importantly, in family relationships. Stability, but not "presnyatina", from which even a faithful husband will run away into the arms of others. How many troubles occur due to the lack of full-fledged family communication, which he begins to appreciate precisely in these years.
When a man is over thirty, a lot of things are not new to him, so such thoughts often come to mind: “Something I don’t feel well (options: tired, busy, tired, etc.), and therefore I’ll leave my wife today at rest. I'd rather sleep or watch TV.
Such "decadence" must be fought. Real concern for your own health involves the following train of thought: “Something I don’t feel well today. Well, to hell with this TV, I’ll go see what my wife is doing there. ”
During this period, a woman can still change something for the better, for example, by buying sexy lingerie, changing her hairstyle, being more affectionate towards her beloved, and so on and so forth.
The thirtieth birthday is a difficult period: a man finds himself at a kind of crossroads between the past and the future. Behind is an irresponsible, careless youth full of frivolous acts and unfulfilled obligations. I don’t want to under this period, but we need to draw a line. Ahead is maturity, from which it is not known what to expect. Therefore, go through this difficult time not only with your husband, but also with him, be especially gentle and patient with him - this will greatly strengthen your marriage.
40 YEARS - NO MIND
Recently, forty-year-olds have developed the habit of not celebrating birthdays: they say, the date has something in common with forties after death. It is better to skip it, away from sin, men argue with superstition that is not characteristic of them.
Outwardly, their fears may not manifest themselves in any way, but the inner world changes greatly. Two features are clearly manifested - increased resentment and sentimentality. What to do! Forty years is a time of doubt. And not only about their capabilities - with THIS, the majority is fine. Forty-year-olds are plagued by thoughts about their place in life, their profession, the attitude of their relatives, children, friends, and bosses towards them. It comes to the point that they cease to see the meaning in their own existence. They are seized by panic, pushing them to madness, to wild steps: some begin to drink deeply, the desperate try to commit suicide. No wonder suicide among forty-year-olds is kept at a consistently high level.
Among other things, this is the age of self-affirmation "on the side." The husband finds a girlfriend half his age, who is fit to be a daughter, and begins to make regular “walkers” to the left, with awkward explanations and stupid tricks. From the outside it looks almost comical: fathers and husbands lose their minds, spit on life experience. “The man is furious,” the neighbors look disapprovingly. In a word, the autumn marathon:
Usually the steps of men who are trying to radically change their lives in the "fatal forties" are accompanied by a loosening of the nervous system, stingy (and not so) tears and the first heart attacks. True, during this period, attempts to leave home remain attempts. It's time for the wives of forty-year-olds to prove their love for their husband, showing maximum restraint and compassion: the "fugitive" is likely to have a desire to back out. He proved his ability to win over a young woman, he enjoyed his passion with her, but to live nearby ... And the prodigal husband, having wandered with a fluffy tail on the side, returns home. Home is home. Remember how much we experienced together, what glorious children grew up, and at 45 it’s not easy to be alone. And is it necessary?
AND LAUGHTER AND TEARS AND LOVE
Just don’t think that you can take a breath if your spouse turned 60. A man “from fifty” one day realizes that “the train is leaving” completely. Then he frantically searches - and, as a rule, finds a baby, next to whom it is easy to seem like a guru, teacher, sage. A 60-year-old man defies youth and finds in a girl friend a source that feeds him.
This is what they say: "Laughter and sin." One example. It happened that the pensioner husband cheated on his grandmother with a young lady who was not fit for his daughter - as a granddaughter. When the foolishness passed, he repented not without pride - they say, I can still: After that, my grandmother called her betrothed only "Bill", did not let go of herself a single step, and then said that she had also found a young lover. She joked, of course, but her jealous husband climbed on her with his fists. Children and grandchildren persuaded the “crazy” for a long time and in the end begged to talk to a psychologist. With the help of a specialist, the family crisis was nevertheless overcome.
DON'T BE AFRAID AND DON'T HURRY
It is difficult to suggest a universal remedy for the crisis of 30-40-50-60-year-olds. In each case, a man should talk to a psychologist himself. But the most common recipes for getting out of age impasses exist.
Moscow psychologist Alexei Vasiliev believes:
- No need to wait with fear for the onset of the "fatal" date. The more you are afraid, the more painful the crisis. When you know what awaits you, you have time to prepare - and calmly, that is, constructively and with concentration, you accept what happened. Crisis recedes before calm.
- In many ways, it is repressed sexuality that is the root cause of crises. By the way, prostatitis, impotence and most sexual disorders are the result of an irregular and irregular sexual life. It is clear that love joys are preventive means. An acute attack of neglected osteochondrosis is unlikely to be removed by a love date, but preventing it by acting in this way is quite realistic.
And yet, in each case, a specific specialist, a psychologist or a sex therapist, can help.
There is an opinion that a 60-year-old man is practically an old man, whose best years are far behind. Others believe that 60 years is no worse than any other age. Who is really right?
What happens to male potential
It is no longer possible to get excited on demand. This is due to the fact that the hormonal background changes, the production of testosterone becomes lower. Decreases:
- sexual excitability;
- the volume of pre-ejaculatory secretion of the cooper glands becomes less;
- the amount of sperm decreases;
- the sensitivity of the genital organ decreases.
True, how soon these changes come, on the 60th birthday or five years later, depends on the athletic form and mood of the man. After all, the production of the male hormone decreases, but does not stop. Even at eighty years old, the average man produces about sixty percent of the level that was in his youth. A man increases the refractory period - the time to restore sexual desire. If at twenty years old it takes no more than half an hour to desire a woman, and at seventy years old it takes three days. It will take about two days to recover from sex at the age of 60.
Other changes in a man's body
The stomach appears, the muscles become flabby. This is partly due to testosterone. But more often this is influenced by a calm, sedentary lifestyle. The attitude is very important. If you have allowed yourself to fade, it will happen faster than it should.
Psychologists in all countries call the age of men about sixty years old the peak of prosperity, a role model, the crown of creative energy, etc. If you, a mature husband, think completely differently, complexes will be activated in you. It is worth contacting a psychologist, do not hesitate to chat with friends. Do not fight your complexes alone. Complexes can win.
How to solve typical problems at this age
Don't be lazy to have sex. Your laziness is just an excuse. It’s as if a defense mechanism is triggered in you, blocking the fear of failing. A man drowns out his experiences with TV, the Internet, etc. You in every possible way cultivate a kind of vegetable in yourself: in your opinion, it’s better to do nothing than to “spend”. Make a choice either in favor of maturity, an active sexual and creative life, or a state of inertia, following stereotypes about age. But in the second case, natural physiological changes will be accelerated. The choice is yours.
The tips are very banal, but it's worth remembering. Compliment your husband, encourage his interest in life, never laugh at him, help him and yourself, create a calm environment around, encourage his interest in sports and creativity. Passion for something helps longevity, including sexual.
