How to make friends with the person you like. Internet to help


In this article, we will talk about how to get close to a person on initial stage relations. The beginning of a relationship can be compared to the foundation of a house. It is during this period that it is determined what the relationship will be like in the future, so it is important to be especially attentive to each other during this period. In the future, it will be almost impossible to change the nature of your relationship.

openness

Openness - necessary element rapprochement in relationships. How many couples broke up because of a simple understatement: none of the partners had the wisdom to openly declare their feelings and desires. However, there must be a healthy balance in everything - excessive openness can also scare your partner away. On initial stage relationships should be avoided. Yes, talking about your feelings (namely, about your feelings, without complaining to your partner) is useful, but you should not say everything that you think about your partner. He needs time to begin to feel comfortable in your company. However, at any stage of the relationship, your partner will want to feel comfortable around you, and excessive openness will interfere with this.

Frequent meetings

They say that people quickly get bored with each other and parting is good for them. However, at the stage of relationship inception, it is the frequent presence of a partner in our lives that helps to get closer, get to know a person better and get used to him. Please note that relationships often develop at work, in a student team, on trips. If you met in another place, for example, on, then a common hobby will help you get closer. In summer, it can be ordinary bike rides, or trips to the pool. But you should not “overfeed” your partner with yourself, spending nights away in a cafe talking about your past life. Such attempts to get closer, rather, on the contrary, will repel. In the question " how to get close to a person» There must always be a balance. Remember that if you take too active steps towards your partner, the person’s reaction will be the opposite, that is, he will move away.

Change or change?

As soon as the relationship goes through the first stage of dating, and people get used to each other a little, and begin to behave more naturally, then both partners discover the real image of each other. At that moment, they may realize that they did not know the person who is nearby at all. And perhaps a lot of it wants to change. Often people are under the illusion that by telling a partner about the qualities that you would like to see in him, you will immediately push him to change. In fact, attempts to change something in each other lead to conflicts and partings. The same is true in reverse side. If your partner is actively trying to change you, and you are ready to change, just to save the relationship, be prepared for the fact that the victims will be unjustified. And relationships still fall apart. Another thing is that it is simply necessary to make compromises and change your habits in a relationship.

Voltaire once wrote: "All the honors of this world are not worth one good friend". However, it is easier to start a relationship than to keep them. But when he seems

Honest self-assessment

If you want to have a real friend, you have to be one yourself. What does it mean? You need to look at yourself through the eyes of another person and give yourself an honest self-assessment. This includes analyzing your strengths and weaknesses. After all real friendship- this is the ability to give, not to take, and first of all not in material, but in emotional terms. You can ask yourself questions: "How will communication with me enrich the other person? What qualities of character will be unpleasant for him?" Before you make friends with a person, most often you need to correct something in your behavior. After all, if someone is greedy, prone to gossip, constantly dissatisfied with life or proud, then the chances of getting close to someone are very low.

On the other hand, those who suffer from shyness or feelings of worthlessness are usually afraid to make friends because they think that no one is interested in them. But by objectively reflecting on their merits and talents, they will be able to raise their self-esteem. Otherwise, they simply will not be able to make friends with anyone, it will be difficult to surround themselves with new people.

Appearance

This is no less important than inner world. Nobody canceled the axiom that people meet by clothes, and this must be taken into account, especially if the person you want to meet sees us for the first time. Clothes should be neat, shoes - clean, hair - washed and well-groomed.

Bad breath, sweat, dirty nails and cigarette smoke (not to mention the fumes) immediately give out a frank slob and close the door to further communication.

How to make friends with a person: manners

Worthy appearance with a smile to boot, they will do their good deed. Also, during a conversation, you need to support eye contact, because if you hide your eyes, look at your feet, then this will act as a signal of insincerity. True, one should not drill a person’s gaze so that he does not feel embarrassed.

Also, the tendency to interrupt or speak in a condescending tone will not play into the hands of someone who is looking for new acquaintances. A know-it-all who constantly emphasizes the ignorance of others is definitely not someone you want to make friends with. To another person, this will be regarded as rudeness. The one who knows how to constantly tease others, often thinks that he has a wonderful sense of humor, in fact, offends and offends others very much. There are those who live by the principle "There are only two opinions - mine and the wrong one." Therefore, they will certainly impose it on everyone and everyone, and this is an outright bad manners.

How to make friends: the first step towards

It is not easy. Questions like “What if it doesn’t work out?”, “Will he (she) think that I am pestering people?” immediately arise.

When it comes to absolutely stranger, say, at a bus stop, in transport or in a queue, then you can casually throw some phrase, for example, about stuffiness in a minibus, the length of the queue or good weather. If he supports the conversation, then you can continue in the same spirit. It is better to take neutral topics for conversation, avoid politics, racism. The main thing to remember is that such unobtrusive communication does not oblige you to anything, you can stop it at any time. But, on the other hand, if the conversation "hooks" both, then you can get a new interesting acquaintance.

The same goes for housemates, employees at work, mothers with prams in the yard - all those who have to see every day, but have not yet had a reason to talk. The purpose of any such conversation is to find common interests. If both people like each other, then their acquaintance over time can develop into strong friendship. As you can see, the question of how to make friends with a person is not difficult.

sincere interest

To know how to make friends with the right people You don't have to be the most communicative person in the world. Enough to show to others. Often people study or work together for years, but know almost nothing about each other. Simple everyday questions "How are you?" or "How was your weekend?" can serve as a bridge to further communication. You can try to strike up a conversation and, by the reaction of a person, determine whether he wants to initiate others into his life or not. Of course, a coherent conversation may not come out the first time. Imposing ugly, but you should not despair. A modest treat, a non-binding gift, SMS - this is not considered something grandiose, but it will make it clear to a person that he is not indifferent, they think about him.

The ability to listen

It is not necessary to talk much. Communication always involves a dialogue, not a monologue. Therefore, even shy and not very talkative people can do it.

But the ability to listen is worth its weight in gold. During the conversation, you should ask leading or clarifying questions. This will show the person that their opinions and feelings are very important to the interlocutor. He will understand that he can trust a new acquaintance. When the interlocutor sees that he is not interrupted, but attentively listen to everything he says, then he will be more inclined to entrust something secret. These conversations bring people together. After someone poured out his soul to another, they seem to have a common secret.

Help in action

For devoted friend you can never do too much. And it is not necessary to wait for some kind of trouble to prove your affection. This may, fortunately, never happen, but in small difficulties it is also important not to remain indifferent. It happens that you need basic help around the house, for example, washing windows or weeding a garden. A friend is unlikely to ask for it, so you need to take the initiative. Go shopping, get in line at the clinic, take your child to kindergarten - such small services can be invaluable. These are like small bricks from which a strong wall of friendship is built.

Of course, if a misfortune happened in a friend’s life (death of relatives, divorce, fire), then support loved one often the only anchor of salvation. It is not enough just to say: "If you need something, contact." This is the time for active action. It is unlikely that a friend will ask for something - in difficult times, people tend to withdraw into themselves. Therefore, sometimes you have to take on the organization of the funeral, housework, repairs. Something as mundane as cooking can be an overwhelming task for an emotionally depressed person. So don't ask, just do. Also, financial assistance will not be superfluous.

In social networks

It has its own, consisting of the number of likes, sent emojis and comments. True, it will not always become real. In social networks, people are more relaxed and begin to communicate with strangers without problems, but here, first of all, you need to remain vigilant, because some online acquaintances do not end well.

But finding a like-minded person and quickly making friends with a person is not difficult at all - just "sit" on thematic forums or communities of interest. There, people are already tuned in to active communication, no need to approach from afar. Having joined some community, the user seems to say: "I want to make friends with a person who also loves, for example, Soviet films."

As can be seen from all that has been said, making a new acquaintance - in a virtual or real world- not so difficult. But will this person become a close friend? Time will show.

Everyone needs friends. And not only when we are sad and lonely, but also when we are happy and cheerful - so that there is someone to share this joy with.

There are people who make acquaintances easily, but for some it is whole problem . So how do you make friends with a person? let's consider different situations and give general recommendations.

Why don't I have friends?

Any person, regardless of gender, age and status, can suddenly realize that he can't find friends.

With what it can be connected? First, take a look around.

Most likely, you will find at least one or two people who and wouldn't mind making friends with you, but for some reason you do not notice them or deliberately ignore them. Try to get in touch with them.


If you recognize yourself in something, then in order to make friends, you first have to work on yourself.

Learn about reasons for absence friendly relations from this video:

How to make friends as an adult?

I want to find people for communication over 50

Age is no barrier to making friends. If you don't know where to start then try the following:

  1. Social networks and dating sites. Here, of course, you should be more careful and not trust too much everyone who writes to you. But it's worth a try. Create an account, write a little about yourself in your profile, tell us about your hobbies: it will be easier to discuss something.

    Try to write to someone yourself: tell them that you are looking for friends to communicate with and try to interest the interlocutor.

  2. Try to find a new hobby. You must definitely like it. Have you ever wanted to go to yoga? Is there an amateur gardening club near your home? Or open cooking classes? Here you have an advantage, because in such places there will definitely be common topics for conversations.
  3. Don't stay at home! This is the most important rule. Where will you get acquaintances and friends if you are within four walls all day long? Try to get acquainted in the store, near the entrance. Start conversations with strangers just remember to be careful.

How to look for friends in 30 years?

People in their 30s often passionate about career or family and absolutely do not find time to meet with friends.

So gradually the circle of communication becomes smaller and smaller ...

What to do?

  1. Find dating in social networks.
  2. go to different Events. Theatre, cinema, exhibition, lecture, meeting of interests - it doesn't matter, you can make acquaintances everywhere. And who knows, maybe later it will develop into a strong friendship. The most important rule: don't be shy!
  3. Chat with work colleagues. Undoubtedly, it is important to maintain working boundaries. But if you stick certain rules communication, you can fully communicate with colleagues, both at work and outside it.

How to find friends? Psychologist's advice:

What to do to make friends with the team?

Whether you've joined a new work team or decided to improve your relationship with your current co-workers, the rules are the same:

  1. Be kind. Do not be rude and do not grumble! Smile, remember names, inquire about the affairs and mood of people, treat them politely. This way you will make a good impression.
  2. Chat with different colleagues. With some of them you will be closer, with someone you will remain at a distance. outstretched hand. However, no one should be ignored.
  3. Don't be arrogant. You should not fawn in front of everyone, but you don’t need to turn up your nose either. Respect yourself, do not let yourself be pushed around, but do not overestimate your price. It turns people off.
  4. Don't gossip. This is the worst thing that can be in a work team. Even if all the other employees are doing just that - never stoop to this.
  5. Be punctual. Everything is simple here: everyone values ​​their time, and no one likes those who are constantly late.

How to join new team and find common ground? Find out from the video:

How to make friends with a child?

How to learn to communicate at school?

The child cannot find mutual language with other kids at school? Then you should help him:

  1. Teach a child general rules communication. Tell us about how to get to know each other correctly, that you don’t have to be afraid to approach someone, that you need to be polite and that you shouldn’t offend anyone.
  2. Form him positive attitude to yourself and to the world around you. You can't let him think he's worse than the rest. But high self-esteem will not do him any good either. Explain the importance of being kind and respectful to everyone.
  3. Create the conditions for communication between the child and his peers. The earlier you start it, the better. But if you realized this only when problems in communicating with classmates had already begun, then do not despair. Try to organize children's holiday, let him invite the one he wants to visit.

    Invite him to attend some kind of circle: you need to gradually expand the child's social circle, this will benefit him in finding friends at school.

  4. Let the child be free. When he communicates with other guys, you do not need to constantly pull him up and correct him. So he develops a complex. Of course, if there is aggression on his part, then you should take him aside and explain what he is doing wrong. When conflict situation can explain how to reach a compromise. But don't forget that otherwise overprotection should not be shown. And even more so, do not indicate with whom he is friends, and with whom not. Give freedom of choice and respect his decision.
  5. Lead by example. All children look up to adults and, first of all, to their parents. Show him that friendship is great, share experiences unobtrusively, talk about situations that happened to you and your friends in childhood.

Is it possible to find a common language with the class?

A child spends most of his time at school and it is very important that he has friends there. What can be done if he does not have them?

How to make friends with classmates? Psychologist's advice:

Build relationships with teachers

Good relationship with the teacher can have a positive effect on the upbringing of the child. After all, it is she who constantly watches him at school, which means she can see if something goes wrong and help, give constructive criticism and useful advice.

But for this it is important what kind of relationship between them is built. And Parents can also influence this:

  • do not criticize the actions of the teacher in front of the child: in this way he will lose authority in his eyes;
  • talk with the teacher yourself, ask him to also take steps towards a good relationship with the child;
  • support teachers in various organizational moments- this will improve his relationship with your child.

And remember, the teacher is your companion and partner. In your common interests send the child to right side. Therefore, it is worth working together.

Don't pick on high school students

Here you will be helped by the same tips as in the case of classmates. The only thing worth adding is to explain that these guys are older, which means don't get pissed off and it is worth respecting them and taking an example.

Individual approach to girls and boys

An individual approach, of course, has a number of features.

And it depends on the interests and character of the classmate. Here the following can be noted:

  • explain to the child about the difference between the sexes, and what features in communication should be taken into account (that girls are a little weaker physically, while boys, on the contrary, are stronger);
  • if a child complains that he cannot make friends with a particular boy / girl, then try to ask about them and give advice based on the information received;
  • friendliness has never let anyone down and be sure to explain that if a classmate does not reciprocate, you should not be offended and angry, you just need to treat him with respect.

Friendship and fellowship of youth

with the guy you like?

Girls sometimes seem like an impossible task - to make friends with the guy they like. But, if you stock up on patience, then you can count on something more. So, you need:

How to hint to a guy that I like him? Find out from this video:

Be on the same wavelength with classmates

Student years are filled not only with couples, but also with fun activities and new friends. But what if you can't make friends with your classmates?

  1. Fight your shyness. Be the first to approach, start conversations, discuss lectures and seminars. After all, you definitely have common themes.
  2. Be simple. You don’t need to build someone out of yourself - it will definitely open up sooner or later and people will turn away from you.
  3. Don't forget your sense of humor. It will help create about you positive impression. But be careful, jokes should not be offensive.
  4. Be kind and open. Offer your help, for example, with missed lectures or difficult topics.
  5. Be confident. People are drawn to those who exude confidence.

Tips for freshmen: how to make friends? Networking for students:

If you want to more tips looking for friends take a look at the following books:

  • Dale Carnegie How to Win Friends and Influence People;
  • Paul McGee Communication Mastery. How to find a common language with anyone”;
  • Philip Zimbardo "How to overcome shyness";
  • Mark Rhodes "How to talk to anyone";
  • James Borg The Power of Persuasion. The Art of Influencing People” and “Secrets of Communication. The magic of words";
  • Keith Ferrazzi "Never Eat Alone-2. How to find friends and mentors for life.

Internet to help

How to find an online friend in VK? In our age, even the loneliest person may feel better.

After all, there is the Internet, where it is much easier to find friends and make friends. Find sites of interest, register in social networks.

But here there are a couple of tips:

  • use your photo as an avatar, so you will inspire more trust in people;
  • fill out your profile, provide some information about yourself;
  • be sociable, do not ignore the interlocutor and respond once a week to his messages;
  • keep in touch: if they don’t answer you for a long time, write to the interlocutor yourself, ask about his affairs;
  • do not forget about caution, do not be too gullible.

Common interests

How to find real friends, and how to make many friends with the same interests?

In order to find true friends, it will take quite a lot of effort and time. therefore don't dwell on it.

Communicate, be friendly, make many acquaintances, keep in touch. In time you will notice what kind of people stayed with you and with whom you have been through a lot - these are real friends.

Find your best friend

The best friend will always support, give advice or constructive criticism, come to the rescue. But how to find it? Actually don't get hung up on this either..

Be friends with various girls, communicate and you will notice that with someone the relationship is more trusting. This is the best friend.

It's not hard to make friends with a person. You need kindness, self-confidence and a little sense of humor. Be yourself, overcome shyness - you will see how people will reach out to you.

Part parental responsibilities is to guide children and help them adjust to life. Often this requires setting certain limits, refusing and correcting the child's behavior. In order for children not to take such instructions with hostility, it is necessary that the relationship between parents and children provides trust and understanding.

Now that we have found out that good relationship with children is the key not only to minimizing misunderstanding, but also to their success in life, let's figure out how to improve relations with a child.

If your relationship with your child is devoid of positive interactions (and according to research, there should be five such interactions for every negative interaction), this can upset the healthy balance in the relationship.

Since after 30 days of repetition, any action becomes a habit, try to include in your to-do list as many actions as possible aimed at your communication with the child.

21 Examples of Positive Interactions

In this regard, we present to your attention 21 examples of positive interactions that will help you get closer to your child.

  1. Hug your child every day for five minutes after he wakes up.
  2. Have breakfast with your child, at the table talk with him about plans for the day.
  3. Do not yell at your child to make him wash his face, brush his teeth, etc. Rather, make a schedule for him with pictures and praise the child when he completes the appropriate tasks.
  4. Leave a note with warm words along with the lunch that you give your child to school, etc.
  5. Jump together on the way to school or sing songs in the car.
  6. When you say goodbye, tell your child that you will miss him and look forward to seeing him at home. Also do not forget to wish your child have a good day instead of the usual "behave yourself."
  7. During the working day, try to have at least a minimum amount of rest, so that when you come home, you have more energy for your family.
  8. Always listen carefully when your child shares information with you about how his/her day went: don't be distracted by work, books, TV or music during this.
  9. If your child gets into a fight, listen to both parties to the conflict, sympathize with them and help resolve the problem peacefully.
  10. If your child gets upset because you cooked something for breakfast/lunch/dinner that he didn't want, don't remake the meal at the child's whim. However, do not forget to sympathize with him and let him cry, etc.
  11. When you and your child are learning lessons, sympathize if the child is having a hard time and encourage him in every possible way.
  12. Laugh at his jokes.
  13. Despite the fact that it is better to limit the child in certain actions, such a restriction does not apply to emotions. If you know how your child feels, you strengthen your emotional connection.
  14. Set aside 15 minutes a day to play with your child. At the same time, let him choose his occupation - build a pyramid of cubes, draw a picture, etc. Let him feel like a "director" for these 15 minutes.
  15. During dinner, ask your child interest Ask and give him time to think about the answer.
  16. Before bathing, arrange pillow fights or other fun competitions.
  17. If the child does not want to go to bed, use your sense of humor and empathy, but insist on your own.
  18. Listen calmly and compassionately to your child's complaints about any problems (for example, if he had a fight with a friend at school or kindergarten), do not rush to get nervous and interrupt the little narrator.
  19. If you get angry when you can't get your baby to bed, calm down first and then use your emotional connection with him to get what you want.
  20. Read to your child before bed. Hug the child and snuggle up to him - let the child feel that everything is fine. Don't forget to tell him how lucky you are to have him.

The list seems long, but in fact, it does not take much time to build a relationship with a child and make them warmer and more trusting. When you develop such habits in yourself, you will notice that the child makes more contact, swears less and wants to follow your advice. Such a relationship between parents and children will lead to the fact that the child will turn to you for advice.


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