How to figure out your feelings for a girl. I want home comfort, respect and justice

A woman is perhaps the only creature in the world who can doubt the correctness of a decision all her life. After all, life constantly offers big choice men, professions and styles, among which it is so easy to get confused and confused. Those individuals who are precisely convinced of the correctness of their decisions, emotions and feelings are truly happy natures. But there are those who are constantly asking questions and reflections, assumptions and doubts. How to truly understand your feelings and check them for "authenticity"?

Ways to evaluate the "truth" of feelings

There are several methods to recognize real feelings among false ones.

Beloved or friend?

Loving your friend is very easy. You know this person for a long time, you understand each other well and have common interests. You are calm and easy together. How to understand that friendship has grown into love? You will become jealous if your friend talks about someone with sympathy or flirts with you with another. You will miss your friend even if you saw him yesterday. In this case, we can talk about love feelings.

Pity or love?

Women have a very strong empathy and compassionate feelings, so many often confuse such emotions with love. It happens that a woman is able to live with this feeling all her life, considering herself a kind of savior of her man, without which he simply cannot survive. You can recognize love and distinguish it from pity by listening to yourself. Do you want to touch this person? Make love to him and share a bed? If these thoughts cause irritation, it's time to leave.

Choice between two men

A difficult choice faces those who find themselves between two men. It is often very difficult to sort out feelings in this case. Then you need to rely on your dreams. With whom would you like to go to the registry office? Who do you imagine with your baby in your arms? With whom would you like to drink tea in the kitchen in old age? Let your fantasies guide you, and you will see how your imagination will draw the necessary pictures.

You can always understand yourself and understand your feelings, it is only important not to dismiss your feelings and learn to listen to yourself more often. Then in your life there will be much more harmony and happiness. Allow yourself to dream, love and open up - down with all suffering!

In the first place of the desire to lure a woman into bed is the usual desire for sex, namely desire. And that doesn't mean he loves you, just a man engulfed sexual passion, so skillfully speaks of love that you can not resist him. And here there are several reasons why you agree to intimacy.

Reason number one- you are truly in love and cannot refuse your beloved man.

Reason number two- no matter how trite it sounds, but you just want sex, like him.

Reason number three- your fear. Yes, it is fear, you are afraid to offend with your refusal, or you simply think “I will refuse, and he will go to another less shy”. And it is precisely with the help of fear that men most often manipulate women. “So you don’t love me at all, I’m not worthy of you, but Lenka would never do that to me.” It is fear of losing a loved one that you often take this step. In fact, he just wants sex.
I say this with confidence, because intimate relationships have two aspects - physiological and emotional. And it is men who are guided by physiology, and women are subject to emotions. For the stronger sex, sex is least of all associated with emotionality, although sometimes they show themselves very expressively, but for women, understanding and warmth come first, and only then the satisfaction of needs. This implies several options for which a man and a woman can become lovers.

She is waiting for love, he loves sex. As life shows, such relationships are doomed to failure. And is it worth starting them at all, because apart from disappointment and pain, they will not bring you anything?
Often a woman has her own views on the relationship between sex and love: she will never sleep with the unloved, she expresses her love by agreeing to sex. How to understand your feelings for a man? The same views are projected onto a man: how much he wants her, how much he loves her. But the man thinks otherwise. He may really want a woman, without experiencing any feelings for her, just because he finds her attractive and seductive.

Every woman needs gentle touches of her lips and hands. He expresses his love through touch, kisses. A man, with caresses and kisses, shows only his irresistible desire. He may not feel any feelings for his partner at all and at the same time give her unsurpassed pleasure, be gentle and sensitive. Any of the women, after caresses, attention and an endless stream of compliments, will definitely fall in love with her partner, even if before intimate relationships did not have any feelings.

For men, the opposite is true. He highly appreciates a woman, if that sophisticated lover, liberated, allows all his secret and explicit desires to be fulfilled, can bring great pleasure. But with all this, he will never fall in love and will not be ready for serious relationship just for these reasons. A great lover in the absence of other virtues will not become a beloved woman experienced man.
And, despite the lack of affection for a woman, a man in bed can confess his love, fall asleep to her gentle words even promise to marry and have children. And all this instantly flies out of his head after receiving pleasure. Usually at this stage, a woman indignantly utters "You said that you love me and want to connect your life with me." A man coldly remarks to himself “What you can’t say when you are already at the peak of passion”, but at the same time he tries to remain silent, otherwise he will not see more hot nights.

It has been scientifically proven that men do not pretend at all, talking about love during intercourse, they are not able to control themselves at the moment of arousal. An excited man will say everything a woman wants to hear. And the most important thing is that in these moments he thinks so. And he really adores and loves a woman when he screams “I love you!” in ecstasy, but he experiences these feelings only during intercourse, after which the emotionality of men changes.
Let's summarize the above. What to do in order to avoid disappointment and resentment.

Never believe the words of men at the time of sexual intercourse, no matter how sweet and truthful they sound;

Don't get romantic during sex. You can think whatever you want about him, but remember, sex for men is the satisfaction of their physiological needs, as an option to relieve tension, a game, but not a manifestation of love. There is a clear line drawn between love and sex.

Now about the most important thing, if after reading given text, you doubted your feelings, whether you composed this love, maybe there really is nothing. Stop, reflect, scroll through your relationship based on the information you have learned. Admit for yourself honestly: “Why are you with him?”, “Are you happy?”. If the answer does not come immediately, do not hesitate, it is better to break off this relationship. Do not cling to a man, only out of fear of loneliness. Don't be afraid to leave someone who takes advantage of you. Make it a rule to start and continue a relationship only with someone who is able to make you happy. If you feel doubts, awkwardness in a relationship, part with ease. After all, tomorrow will be a new day and new experiences. Love and appreciate yourself, dear women.

Emotions and feelings are not always the same thing. Sometimes we feel primary impulses and take them for true feelings. And sometimes even the strongest deepest feelings are considered ordinary emotions.

Understanding oneself is sometimes not easy, sometimes it is more difficult than helping someone, because, as you know, you know better from the outside. To understand the nature and power true feelings deep introspection is needed, sometimes you have to resort to outside help. It would seem that it could be easier than to divide the world into "white" and "black", to understand whether we hate a person or love him. However, sometimes it turns out that the original hatred degenerates into sympathy, and what seemed like love seems like an absurd misunderstanding.

Understanding your feelings for a man is not an easy task. You can live for many years with a partner and realize that this is absolutely not your person. What to say about the situation when you are familiar with your potential chosen one relatively recently. How to understand how you feel for this man?

To begin with, it is worth trying to abstract from your specific situation. Take a look at it as if from the outside: evaluate whether you are suitable for each other, whether something can work out for you. Think about what advice you would give in this situation if it wasn't you.

Then think about what you like about your chosen one, and what you don’t like very much - find the advantages and disadvantages. If you see almost no flaws, then you are definitely in love. If you understand that you would have corrected a lot, then you are not on your way.

Imagine yourself with this person in the future - do you see a joint future at all. It is believed that one of the most common female mistakes it is considered to make wedding plans when you have just received a compliment. However, it is worth deciding for yourself what kind of relationship you yourself want: do you often fall in love or just feel sympathy, do you want strong relationship or short-term adventures.

Try not to call the chosen one and avoid communication for a couple of days. If you miss him, then you really have some feelings. If you understand that nothing has changed, then you can easily live without it.

There are opposite types of people: hunters and victims. Accordingly, in relationships, the former prefer to conquer and catch up with their “victim”, the latter are this “victim”. If you belong to the first type, then you will not like it if your chosen one acts persistently, because. You consider it your prerogative. Therefore, look at how you react to his manifestations of signs of attention - if you are annoyed by initiative, and you feel cool after that, then you are not in love, and this is just a game for you.

So, if you have decided that you still feel something for your chosen one, now you should understand what kind of feelings these are. It can be love, sympathy, or maybe love at first sight. AT this case it is worth addressing only directly to yourself, to your feelings. Love or not, time will tell, but love or sympathy can be determined by meeting with a person and communicating with him. Take a closer look at your beloved, whether everything suits you in his manners, habits, behavior. How much do you like him outwardly, what would you like to change in his appearance. Finally, look at him and ask yourself the question: what do I feel for him, is it love.

Through reflection and analysis, you can understand how you feel about a man. But is it so important if you are just fine with him? Think about it, maybe it's not worth it. And you just need to live and enjoy your pleasant emotions and experiences with him.

Olga Myagkova

A woman is the only creature who is inherent in her whole life to doubt the correctness of her choice. Life constantly offers an ever-richer "range" of men, professions, lifestyles, styles and other options for the beautification of existence, because of which to accept the only the right decision it can be very difficult, if not impossible.

But rushing from one temptation to another is also not an option. After all, if you can somehow agree with the exchange of a skirt or a car, then this method will not work with the choice of a life partner.

Those women who are confident in their emotions and feelings may well consider themselves completely happy, which cannot be said about those who are heaped on every day by a pile of doubts, reflections and assumptions.

How to understand your feelings, test them for strength and not let life go to waste? Read about all this (and more) in this publication.

Where does the need to understand feelings come from?

Often girls, especially young ones, confuse emotions and feelings for a person, which provokes false love. It mainly occurs when, among a noisy and big company a young man with the makings of a leader chooses only one lady, which flatters her incredibly.

But is it capable of causing a real and lasting attachment for many years? Or is such attention just a chance to feel your uniqueness and exclusivity?

Almost the same a difficult situation inherent in couples who have been in marriage union. How to independently understand your feelings for your husband, if everyday life ate them almost to the very root, the brightness of sensations and the spark of tenderness went out? Is it necessary to destroy the family and go in search of a new life partner?

To help yourself, and not torment the person in love with you, expose existing relationship deep, thorough and impartial analysis.

Problem Solving Methods

Depending on the circumstances under which the connection appeared and developed, its truth and necessity can be assessed in the following ways:

• If a young man singled out one girl from the whole company, then we can understand his real intentions not by words, but by deeds, for which we often have to use female cunning. For example, ask him for help, a favor or a favor, devote to trouble or a pressing problem. Get a response - he does not need you for PR, the status of an experienced conqueror, or as a sex tool;

• Try to assess how close your alleged loved one is to you, how quickly you find with him mutual language and "points of contact". If a topic for conversation arises by itself, there are common hobbies, goals and interests, then drive doubts away. Otherwise, when the conversation starts with difficulty, quickly subsides, you feel stiffness and internal tension, give the guy a turn from the gate, and go in search of a new applicant;
• Often, psychologists recommend using this method of how to sort out your feelings towards a man. Break contact with him for as long as you can stand. Do not write, do not call and go to him, let yourself know if you miss him or do not think about him at all. At the time of the first meeting after long separation listen to own feelings. If they are close to indifference, everything falls into place;
• It also happens that a break leads to even more confusion. Then great option how to figure out your feelings for a beloved previously beloved guy, it will become straight Talk with him. It is possible that he is tormented by similar doubts, and together you will soon clarify the situation;

• It also happens that a woman consciously becomes a “mommy” for a man, takes care of him in every possible way, dissolves in him, losing her personality. In this situation, remember that both the husband and the new partner need to contribute to the relationship, otherwise a reliable companion will not come out of him.

but on the other hand

It turns out that stronger sex it is also inherent to doubt the correctness of his choice, however, this happens to him much less often. How to understand the feelings of a beloved man? Watch him, and by the actions and behavior of the applicant you will be able to understand everything perfectly.

So, you are not indifferent to him if he:

• gives you flowers with or without reason;
• trying to meet from work;
• talks about a joint future;
• reacts normally to children from a previous marriage;
• goes with you to his parents, mutual friends, for parties and public events;
• trying to provide all possible assistance in the household;
• sacrifices his interests for you;
• avoids quarrels and partings "for a while".

It is much more difficult for a husband who has to solve the problem of how to help his own wife sort out her feelings for him.

The fact is that the stronger sex is not able to keep track of the changes taking place in the consciousness, thoughts and mood of a woman, men are accustomed to acting “clumsily”, through, trying to quickly establish the exact problem and get rid of it instantly. In the end, things get even worse.

What can be advised in this situation? Don't be ashamed to contact family psychologist, which will gently and unobtrusively find out the reason for the cooling of relations, and help find ways to eliminate it.

Dear ladies! Agree that it often happens that feelings "cool down" not because of some objective reason, and due to the lack of fire in the relationship. Talk to your chosen one! Be honest with him! Look for joint adventures, get positive charges together - this unites and strengthens the union much more than intimacy.

Harmony, explosions of positive and sparks of passion for your relationship!

On average, about five thousand thoughts rush through a person’s head per day, and some of them are unconscious. Most often spinning in the head intrusive thoughts in connection with some experiences, events. People play them over and over in their heads. You can stop this flow, choose what to think about yourself and how to perceive the situation if a life stage has come at which it is not clear what to do next, where to go.

Questions to help you understand yourself

Psychologists say that for self-development and introspection, it is useful to ask yourself questions. Sometimes it’s worth stopping and thinking, deciding on your desires and goals. If attention is not paid to understanding oneself, the sense of individuality is weakened. Further, a person begins to succumb to someone else's influence and lead a lifestyle that moves away from his main goal.

Personal questions for yourself:

• “What five words describe me as a person? » This will identify key characteristics.
• “What are my shortcomings? » Most often, people focus on trying to get rid of shortcomings. They just need to be accepted, everyone has them without exception.
• “Do I like to take risks? » This will determine attitudes towards uncertainty.
• “What are my strengths? » When a person is aware of all his strengths, he begins to build his life most productively, including the personal sphere.
• “What makes me different from the rest? » It is these exceptional qualities, quirks, ideas that distinguish one person from another.
• “What am I lying about and why? » Sometimes we lie to ourselves. To understand yourself and solve problems, you need to tell yourself the truth.
• “What movies, shows and books do I love? » Analysis of the answer will allow you to better understand yourself as a person.
• “Do I take responsibility for my mistakes, or am I looking for someone to blame? » By blaming others for their mistakes, people get stuck in place. Taking responsibility for your life will speed up the process of achieving the goal, and the ability to forgive will allow you to let go of difficult situations.
• “If my house is on fire, what three things will I save? » By answering this question, you can understand what things you have attachment to and what makes you happier.
• What needs to happen in order for me to truly live? » Most live as if their life is a draft.
• “What am I avoiding? » Look your fears in the eye.
• “Do I feel guilty easily? » Some individuals tend to blame only themselves for all the troubles of mankind. It's time to let go of the bad feeling.

Career related questions:

• What is the most comfortable environment for me to work in? » This is to determine the ideal working environment.
• “Does competition motivate me? » For some, competition pushes them to reach their goal.
• What is more important, family or career? » It is a defining factor in lifestyle.
• “Is my productivity higher in the morning or in the evening? » Success directly depends on lifestyle. To make your life more productive, you need to decide on biorhythms.
• “Which word do I use more often, “yes” or “no”? » If yes, then this means the inability to refuse and the fact that public priorities are higher than one's own. There is no desire to work on weekends - which means you should learn to refuse.
• “Am I a patient person? » This factor determines whether there is enough strength to achieve the goal or not.
• “Who and what inspires me? » The answer to this question will help in solving the problem of creative block.
• “Who and what exhausts me? » By limiting contact with these things or people, you can increase your productivity.
• Am I more comfortable being alone or with company? » This question also applies to work: you need to understand where it is more comfortable, in public or in your office.

how to be beautiful and well-groomed girl

How to understand that a feeling of love has arisen?

Love is not only wonderful feeling, which was praised at all times by artists, writers and poets. It is also a series of biochemical reactions in the human body. If it is difficult for a woman to understand her feelings for specific man she should listen to her body. Some reactions of the body are signs of falling in love, caused by an increase in the level of certain hormones:

1. 1. At the sight of a person for whom there are feelings, there is a rapid heartbeat. This is caused by an increase in the level of adrenaline. The palms become sticky and sweaty.
2. 2. The next sign is obsessive thoughts. This involves a decrease in the hormone serotonin. Memories and ideas begin to emerge spontaneously, any object reminds of a loved one.
3. 3. If a girl thinks that her boyfriend is perfect, this indicates love. There is a loss of appetite, insomnia, euphoria - manifestations of an increase in the level of dopamine. It is this hormone that is responsible for addiction.
4. 4. Another love hormone is oxytocin. It contributes to the preservation of feelings for a long time.

How longer relationship, the greater the decline in hormones. Therefore, these signs are relevant at the beginning, over time they become less pronounced.

To understand your feelings towards a guy, you need to analyze the situation. First you need to understand why doubts arose and where their root is. Help in this matter following tips psychologist.

Closeness with the person should be valued. Common topics, interests, goals, hobbies - then problems should not arise. They appear when there is difficulty, stiffness or tension in starting a conversation.

There is a method for checking yourself, which is suitable even for a teenager. For a while, communication with the person breaks. You can't call, write, or even meet. If possible, combine this with a trip. A change of scenery helps put everything in its place and streamline your thoughts. If after that there is a feeling of indifference, then you can interrupt the connection forever.

Sometimes this method is confusing. In this case, it is worth talking frankly with your partner about the situation.