How to become a close person for a man. How to be always desirable for a man: women's secrets and advice from psychologists
We all really want to be for our beloved herself - the best in the world. Unique, irresistible, irreplaceable ... In a word, such that for many years it would not occur to a man to look for another woman. Is it possible? Quite. You just need to know how to become the only one for him, and try to be just that. If you approach this issue with a soul, everything will not be so difficult. After all, no matter how different the representatives of the stronger sex are, their ideas about the ideal life partner are similar. And the qualities of character that correspond to these ideas are in almost every woman. We just don't pay attention to them sometimes. And in vain. Because our happiness depends on these qualities. Let's see what men really want from us. And think about how likely it is to meet their desires.
What do men want from women?
There are significant differences between male and female psychology, which are the most common causes of family conflicts. This natural dissimilarity is expressed in the fact that the representatives of the stronger sex are action-oriented, while the representatives of the weaker sex are oriented towards contact. Women need to be told about everything that happens to them. Men, on the other hand, simply cannot listen to such speeches for a long time and begin to interrupt, criticize, and advise. Of course, we get annoyed, because we need to speak out! The result of irritation is a quarrel.No, men, of course, also need communication. But they don’t really like to calm an upset woman. Our loved ones, defending themselves from the negativity poured out by a friend of life, withdraw into themselves, get nervous and strive to quickly interrupt her whining. Yes, yes, we think we are looking for sympathy! And men are sure that we are noah. Therefore, so that the missus does not get angry and does not try to flee to friends, or at least to the next room, let's go to a friend, mother, neighbor and complain to them about the injustice of others. They will listen, and sympathize, and understand. And let the husband rest while watching TV. He doesn't need our whining.
In other words, one of the answers to the question of how to become the only one for a man will be advice to bother him less, washing the bones with acquaintances and complaining about every little thing. However, in order for the missus not to think of leaving for another lady for many years, this is not enough. You also need to have joint worries, troubles, deeds with him. It is quite difficult for the representatives of the stronger sex to love a woman with whom they meet only at the dinner table and in bed for a long time. But if the spouses jointly solve some serious issues, feelings eventually turn into deep affection.
In this case, the communication between husband and wife acquires a different quality. They do not just tell each other about what happened to them today or some time ago, but consult, trying together to find a way out of this or that situation. Of course, it is necessary to discuss things that are clear to both. You should not discuss with a man something that he does not understand at all.
These are, of course, fairly simple tricks that help maintain male affection for a long time. More powerful means will be common experiences and actions, accompanied by considerable risk and significant deprivation. Joint victories and defeats make a woman special in the eyes of a man. And memories of them often remain in his memory for many years.
But what if there are few or even none of risky, deprivation-related situations? Do not create them artificially! You can do things like that that you will never clear up later ... No, of course. There are enough difficulties in life as it is. The main thing is to try to overcome them together, and not take everything upon yourself. It's no secret that many women try to make a man experience as few difficulties as possible. And often this leads to very negative consequences. Representatives of the stronger sex need personal victories, otherwise they either wither or begin to rush about in search of a way to express themselves. In such throwings, it is not far from betrayal - you never know what your loved one decides to express himself? So it’s better to give him the right to win, while supporting, helping with advice and discussing some tasks with his man. We will become his closest and most reliable friend.
However, this does not mean that sex should recede into the background. But in intimacy, in order to become the only one, we should be more selfish. Yes, we are taught virtuosic ways to satisfy our partner, we are taught that in bed we should give him maximum pleasure, and so on. But most normal men get this maximum only when the woman herself is drowning in the pleasure of intimacy. They become attached to such partners much more than to those who skillfully own sexual techniques. And, the higher the level of pleasure of a woman, the stronger the man is drawn to her.
To become unique for your beloved, you must, first of all, be interesting to yourself. A woman who is not indifferent to her own personality is not always the same. She strives for improvement and is constantly changing both externally and internally. Most men are very attracted to such variability. It is never boring with such a lady and she cannot be studied and unraveled to the end. And if a woman cannot be unraveled, she is destined by fate to be the only one for a man.
But what to do when abrupt changes are not characteristic of our nature? If we are uncomfortable in an unstable environment, we should not break ourselves. You can always be the most desirable for your man with the help of image changes. How to change it is an individual question. Let's see what our image options could be. 
Options for changing the female image
As we have already said, changing the image helps any woman to always be unique and desirable for her beloved. Always the same, it does not cause excessive interest, which often contributes to the decline of sexual and emotional attraction. Alternating our roles, we become unpredictable, extraordinary, not like others. And men receive in the face of one woman several different ones. And this is a great incentive to rush home from work to find out who is waiting for you there today, and an excellent tool for strengthening relationships.What image can we choose for ourselves? Yes, whatever. Here, for example:
- The image of a gentle angel. Loose curls, pink shadows, pink lip gloss and a light foundation that makes the skin of the porcelain white will help to create it. As an outfit, a light light dress with a rather deep neckline is suitable;
- The image of a passionate impudent hooligan. For him, you will need old, cut at the knees and hips, jeans, cheap sneakers and a black T-shirt. With the help of therapeutic oil or gel, we create the effect of sticky hair, for the lips we choose red matte or beige lipstick, we bring the eyes catchy with a black pencil;
- The image of a shy village simpleton. We put on some shapeless sundress, tie our hair with a ribbon, fit into modest flat shoes and refuse makeup and accessories. At the same time, it is advisable to portray embarrassment and modesty with all your might (if they are not the main character traits);
- The image of an arrogant, impregnable business woman. It will be created by business clothes, a neat hairstyle, expensive earrings, a watch and dark lipstick. Beautiful bright hairpins, catchy shadows, an abundance of jewelry are not suitable for this image;
- The image of the concubine of the Turkish Sultan. This image implies dark hair, so if we have light hair, we put on makeup or put on an appropriate wig. We decorate the hair with a shiny hairpin, brightly bring the eyes and eyebrows and do not regret the black mascara. We paint our lips with cherry lipstick, put on scarlet underwear, cover our face with a translucent scarf. We attach another similar scarf to the panties. We decorate the ankle and wrist with bracelets;
- Image of a fragile nymph. We put on flesh-colored underwear, apply silver, green or blue shadows, paint lips with pale pink lipstick. Fresh flowers or decorative ivy can be sewn on linen.
The question of how to become the only one for a man worries many women. It is solved quite easily, you just need to want. The vast majority of young people dream of being understood and accepted in the family as they are. To love recklessly and always be ready to support. To make every day different from the previous one. That's all.
A woman without love is like a rose without the sun: sooner or later it will wither without opening to its full extent. It is love that gives us, women, endless energy, inspires, inspires and makes more beautiful. Of course, she also transforms men and makes them better. But it is for the beautiful half of humanity that love is one of the basic needs that underlies personal happiness. In this article we will try to figure out how to become loved, indispensable and most desirable for your other half.
I love, and therefore I live!
This line from the famous poem by V. Vysotsky fully reflects the importance of the presence of mutual love in the life of every woman. It very briefly, but quite capaciously expresses the main reason why we all strive for love.
The fact is that, due to certain psychological characteristics, a person only fully feels himself an integral and harmonious personality when there is another person in his life who sincerely loves and accepts him. In childhood, this role is played by the mother, and in adulthood - by a loved one. Of course, you can object that the person himself is a ready-made personality, and he does not require any additions, but this is not entirely true. We all need security, praise, admiration, care and attention, which we can only fully receive from another person. And these are the main manifestations of love - a great sense of unity and complete acceptance.
I want to be loved and needed!
If there were fairy rules in our life, then it would be enough to get a magic wand or ask for a Golden Fish and voila - “love to the grave” is guaranteed to you! But, alas, our reality is far from the fairy-tale world and in this life you need to achieve everything on your own. Including mutual love. It happens only in fairy tales and women's novels that He saw Her, their eyes met, and a life-long unearthly love flared up between them. Modern men, if they take their eyes off their smartphone or tablet, it’s more likely to “meet your eyes” with your neckline, and not to see your “deep inner world”. Of course, you can continue to believe that somewhere else there are real romantics and princes. But waiting for this endangered species from the Red Book to find you and make your love happy is stupid! Firstly, the competition of "clever women and beauties" is very high. Secondly, so much time may pass that the expression "to the grave" will be too relevant. Therefore, if you want to be loved and happy now, and not sometime there, then take fate into your own hands!
How to become a beloved and desired woman?
So we got to the most important question that torments women all over the world - how to become loved and desired. We’ll make a reservation right away that you won’t be forcibly nice, and you won’t build your happiness on someone else’s grief. These folk sayings are full of worldly wisdom and are based on the bitter experience of our ancestors. Therefore, if you want to be truly loved, desired and happy, then leave all attempts at love spells and removing a man from the family. If a man is not free or completely indifferent to you, this is not your man. He can't make you happy, no matter how much you want to.
It is a completely different matter if both of you are free and nice to each other, but he is slow to declare his love. In such a situation, it is possible, and sometimes necessary, to take the initiative in the relationship. Just do it carefully and gently. Because many men, like wild horses, only sensing a hint of a “bridle” of a serious relationship, immediately run, striving their heads. Therefore, you need to tame your "mustang" carefully, slowly.
To begin with, make your meetings for him the most desirable time of day. This is not as difficult as it might seem at first glance:
- surround your loved one with care and attention, be interested in his affairs and problems, make pleasant surprises and gifts.
- never refuse a joint holiday, even if he offers a trip to football or gatherings with his friends. By agreeing, you show a man that he is interesting to you, and his hobbies are important to you. Just please do it sincerely and not faked!
- treat his family and friends with respect, even if they are not very nice to you. Perhaps you just don't know them well yet. Give them a chance.
But most importantly - do not make your property out of a man. Do not try to control his every step with endless questions and calls. If you do everything right, then he will tell you about where he was and what he did during the day. Do not be jealous from scratch and do not manipulate - this is terribly annoying to the stronger sex. If you are worried about his new secretary, then try to calmly talk to him about it without throwing tantrums. Learn to trust your loved one and from such an amazing woman like you, he will never leave for another!
How to become a beloved wife?
Alas, it also happens that once having known the great miracle of mutual love, people lose it over time. Life, problems, lack of money, eternal employment, children ... All this literally destroys romance in a relationship. And along with it, the desire to be near, to please each other and pay attention and care disappears. Fortunately, if the love of the spouses is real, then it is easy to reanimate it.
And you need to start with romantic memories. Our memory is unique! And even if it seems to you that past feelings have long been forgotten, then try to revive them with the help of photographs, aromas, music. For example, do you remember how you first met your husband and what exactly in his behavior, appearance, manners hooked you to the core? What compliments did he give you on a date? What song do you love to dance to? If you rummage through your memory, you can find many such threads that can restore freshness to feelings. Even the fragrance of the perfume that you used during your dates can remind your loved one of a past passion.
Arrange a romantic surprise evening at your favorite restaurant, indulge in memories associated with this place and forget about all the problems for a while. Remind your husband about what a beauty he led down the aisle many years ago. And even if your appearance has changed a lot, then a beautiful dress and good makeup will help you impress your loved one.
Remember that you need to restore the former sharpness of feelings step by step, gradually. And one date is not a panacea. Try to pay more attention to your husband, quarrel and be offended less, talk more and discuss common problems every day. Noticing your efforts, your beloved man will definitely support you and soon you will experience a second honeymoon together!
Love yourself and you will be loved and desired
And in conclusion, we add an important thought: if you do not love and respect yourself, then do not hope that someone else will love you. Therefore, if this pure and sincere feeling is not in your life, then start with self-love. Just do not confuse true love with egocentrism, selfishness and narcissism. Self-love is acceptance and approval, inner harmony and a sense of unity.
Reward yourself for good deeds and important achievements. Learn to constructively criticize your mistakes. Strive for self-development and spiritual growth. Take the time to discover a new facet of your personality. And very soon you will notice that your life is changing for the better, and many problems are gone from it forever. Be kind to yourself and those around you. Respect your body and take care of it. Realize your plans and dreams. Experience harmony! And she, like a magnet, will certainly attract into your life the knowledge of how to become loved!
In this article, I will give a man's point of view on how a woman can become loved and desired. It is foolish to deny that the possibility of becoming loved depends not only on the behavior of a woman. A significant role here is also played by the compatibility of characters, the correspondence of appearance, the voice of a woman, etc., some kind of image laid down by nature for a man, in which he may or may not fall in love in principle, as well as some share of luck.
However, very, very much depends on the behavior of the woman herself. Some women fall in love much more often, and most importantly, they can keep the love and desire of a man for many years. Some women fall in love much less often, and even if they fall in love, such women cannot keep love even for a few weeks.
What are the main differences between this behavior? I will briefly write about this below..
First, respect your life, your hobbies, etc..
In the male world, if someone gives up or refuses to fight, then all respect for him instantly disappears. Weak, coward, or something like that. (With age, this is not so pronounced, but still present).
With a woman, of course, not everything is so straightforward, and in relations with them, men act a little differently. 
rules, but, nevertheless, there are similarities. In your video film "How to Keep a Man" I spoke in great detail about the fact that if a woman gave up her hobbies, her personal space for the sake of “serving” a man (surrendered without a fight), then the man instantly ceases to respect her. After all, only equal or stronger people are respected. (We are talking, of course, about the female manifestation of power).
And the consequences of this are quite predictable. Try to find in your environment a person whom you do not respect (do not hate, namely, do not respect). A person who is not respected is not listened to. His desires and interests are ignored.
Men don't marry women they don't respect. Such women are much more likely to be rude, cheat, and God knows what they are doing. It is clear that there can be no talk of any love and attraction. (And if it was, it quickly disappears).
The recipe for getting out of this situation is quite simple and obvious. You just need to find the strength and courage in yourself for such steps. Courage will appear when you realize that this is extremely beneficial for you in the first place.
What needs to be done to remain loved and desired?
First. Mind your own business, whatever the cost.
It is clear that most of the men will prevent you from doing your own business, because this reduces his significance for you, and you also become unavailable to him at any time when he wants to meet or see you.
Therefore, be prepared for some kind of resistance on his part (except when you are so tired of each other that any parting is a joy).
I don't know what business you might have. Maybe it's a job (without exaggeration, of course), maybe some kind of hobby, sports, meetings with friends, etc. Take care of yourself and make time for your activities.
If there were no classes, then you must definitely find them. Go dancing, study English, draw, sing, take professional courses, even if they do not give you anything particularly useful, etc.
In addition to becoming an “elusive” woman for a man, you will have some interesting information that is inaccessible and interesting to him. You will meet with someone, discuss something, do something.
The same information comes up. If nothing new happens every day in a woman’s life, especially if she sits at home alone, then gradually communication with her becomes less interesting. Reading books and watching TV is only a very small substitute for meeting new people.
It just so happened instinctively that people are much more interested in other people than in some thoughts, books, etc. Therefore, if you have communication with other people inaccessible to men, then interest in you will increase. It's not even discussed.
Of course, a lot depends on what you will be doing. Some activities will arouse more interest in your partner, some will noticeably less. But the result will still be.
Another big plus is that it will be much easier for you to follow the next tip about not 
do too many things for a man. After all, if you don’t have your own life, then it will be difficult for you to do so so as not to immerse yourself in the life of another person (this can be your loved one, mother, girlfriend, etc.). In his book “19 mistakes with men. How to make him respect and love you? I wrote for several chapters how important it is not to put his interests above yours. How important it is to be able to value and respect yourself, to defend your personal time and your interests. Precisely to defend, tk. men do not like to give up their positions without a fight.
How much time can and should be devoted to your hobbies in order to be interesting enough for a man and for yourself, of course, on the one hand, and on the other hand, not to immerse yourself in a hobby so much that it will harm your relationship?
It seems to me that the ideal is somewhere around 2-3 times a week for 2 hours. In youth, when there is a lot of time, and you rarely meet, it can be much more time. Later, when you live together and there are a lot of other obligations, it is advisable not to go beyond the specified limits. The desire for excessive careerism, working 12 hours a day without days off, constant business trips, canceling dates, talking only about a hobby (career) can easily destroy any relationship.
In total, in order to easily keep the love and desire of a man, it is important that you have some kind of life of your own, except for your husband. Ideally, if this life is just as interesting to him (not necessarily the hobby or work itself, but let's say the people with whom you communicate). However, there is no need for extremes. Your "other" life should not destroy relationships in the family.
Second. Don't do too much of a man's business.
And I wrote about this in detail in the book. "19 mistakes with men", but dear ladies how not to hear me. Or they don't want to hear. I repeat once again - your beloved man, the only and beloved one, should always feel that he is just one of many important cases that claim your attention.
In fact, this is a repetition of the previous rule, but in a different variation. Don't pay too much attention to your partner's business. No need to go to extremes, of course, when you know nothing about what he does and how he is progressing.
However, don't go into too much detail. You don’t need to make decisions for him, write a dissertation with him, constantly push him to do something, and only do what to listen to him.
Ideally, this is when a man takes 20 percent of your attention. Less is probably not very good. Does he take more of your attention? Drive him away from your thoughts, otherwise the love will evaporate in a couple of months or even faster.
Example. A girl in communication with her boyfriend talks only about him. How is he doing. What projects does he have? She goes very deep into his life. She searches for information on the Internet for him. She runs around as a courier helping his project. She writes some reports, diplomas, etc. for him. She cooks for him, cleans his laundry.
They don't talk about her at all. He doesn’t really know either her, or her desires, or her life (and she doesn’t have a special life, except for the interests of a young man). She begins to go with him where her man goes. Engaged in the same sports, hobbies, etc.
She takes care of him. Whether he has dressed and will not catch a cold? And did her beloved eat, would he die of hunger? Have his socks and underpants been ironed?
The result of such dissolution in a man's life is usually natural. He finds himself another woman.
Again, I'm not trying to tell you that you should never do anything from the list above. It's great if you listen to a man. It's great if you know what he's doing. It's great if you sometimes help him or cook deliciously.
The only question is, how much does it take your attention and in what form does care take place? If a man absorbs 10-30 percent of your attention (30% is not in the first year of family life), if you take care of him as a strong man, and not a child, then everything is fine. If you confuse a man and a small child, then I feel sorry for you. About what attention and care is for men, and how to behave correctly in order to constantly arouse interest in a partner, I wrote in the first book. How to fall in love with a man for life? or Never run after a man, let him run after you!”.
In summary, do not immerse yourself completely in the life of a man. Here, as usual, there are two extremes. The first is when a woman practically does not know the life of her beloved from the inside. The second extreme, which I am talking about, is when a woman is completely immersed in the life of her companion. This is an analogue of a mother's care for a small child who cannot do anything without a mother. But I will repeat the idea that I have already said more than once. Mothers rarely get married, and if they do, they are often abandoned. (Although anything can happen).
Third. Respect yourself.
A man cannot be in love with a woman he does not respect. This you already, I hope, understood. And even if he was in love before the wedding, then as he loses respect, love and desire are lost.
In this article I will describe the multiple necessary actions that will allow you to respect yourself more.
— Never run after a man.
Never chase a man, even if you're wrong(I'm not saying don't ask for forgiveness, I'm saying don't run after a man). And in general, is a woman not right? A woman is always right, a man is always wrong. So no need to run 
their circumstances.
Let's assume you're actually wrong. You can call after some time and apologize, or send an SMS message (short, not 2 sheets). Well, it's enough. This is something of an overload. Running after a man with an apology - this should not be.
No need to come up with any nonsense that the “little boy” is ill or his car has broken down or there are big troubles at work, so he needs to call himself.
There are no exceptions (more precisely, the bar is very high) for this rule. A man is a man. He's sick, let him heal. Trouble at work, path solves trouble. At this moment, calling him is obviously running into rudeness. If he gets bored, he will call.
If a man called, and then stops calling, then he does not respect you. Send him somewhere else. Maybe this will somehow correct his behavior. If not, then send it even further, and even further, that you are embarrassed (:yes:) . It still won't make any sense.
Fourth. Respect the woman in you.
Somehow lately it has become fashionable to be more and more feminist person. And this, in fact, is trying to behave in a way that deeply contradicts the instincts of a woman invested over millions of years.
But male instincts tell a man to fall in love and love women, not feminist women who behave like men. And if a woman behaves like a woman, then it is much easier for a man to fall in love with her for life than with something feminist.
What exactly do I mean?
— Instinct tells a woman not to sleep with the first man she comes across in the first few meetings..
Now I'm not talking about morality and so on. things. Let's talk about the instincts that largely govern our behavior with you. For many, many centuries in a row, sex for women carried much more risks than for men. Pregnancy, the need to feed a child, as a result of temporary helplessness, etc., all this led to the fact that a woman and her relatives evaluated a man for a much longer time before having sex with him. It's not moral, it's instinct.
Men are also much more respectful, much more likely to marry, and much more likely to remain in love with those women who do not sleep with men on their first date. There are exceptions, but they are either rare and should not be taken as a basis.
Refusing intimate relationships in the very first meetings with males is a natural behavior for a woman. But lately it has become fashionable to reject it and even be ashamed of it. But remember that instincts govern our behavior. Instincts tell a man that women who are inaccessible at first meetings should be valued more. It is the instincts that prompt further behavior, such as marriage, love for life and the preservation of the family.
Don't try to think that the defenses have made all this instinctive behavior irrelevant. Everything works the same as it did thousands of years ago. After all, in the average man, instincts work harder than brains. And your task is to use this, and not complain that men are “stupid, imperfect, wrong” and that their brains are so bad.
— Instinct tells a woman to be weaker than a man.
Femininity is when a woman is weaker than her man. This is an axiom. Women who are weaker than their men, attract them for many years, can easily retain male love and attraction.
This point is often misunderstood or disputed. Therefore, the statement will be for a paragraph, and the comments for several paragraphs.
A weak woman does not mean at all that you need to indulge a man in everything, always give in to him, completely immerse yourself in his life, not have your own interests and hobbies, etc. The last thing I would like you to do is to understand this point as something like that.
On the contrary, in almost every paragraph of this article I talk about not allowing a man this and that, not allowing him to do this, not immersing himself in a man’s life, you need to respect yourself, send him, etc.
To be weaker than a man is only to allow a man to decide for himself and achieve success for himself, mostly in the outer life and partly in the inner life of a family or just a couple.
This is too broad a topic. I can only suggest a criterion for whether you are behaving correctly in this area. If you consciously try to be weaker than a man, and from this he takes on more and more responsibility and decides more in life, then you are doing everything right.
If you become weaker, and nothing happens to a man, then most likely you are doing something wrong or have not worked out the image of parental relationships (read about this in the book by A. Guy). And 
just don't tell me that men don't want to do anything. It is not true. Young men want to do a lot, but they can't do anything. Men in the prime of life can do a lot, but they don’t want anything anymore. But men, under the right guidance of a woman, still do a lot and almost with the belief that they themselves wanted it..
In summary, do not try to be stronger than your man in masculine matters and at the same time be strong in feminine matters. That is, recognize a woman in yourself and defend your women's true rights.
- Instinct tells a woman that a man should treat her well, and a woman may not always treat a man well.
Endure, fall in love - this saying is more about women whom their husbands treated well, and then the women fell in love with them.
A man should always treat a woman well- this is an axiom of love for life. A woman can treat a man either well or moderately well., then even quite moderately well and everything can go more or less normally.
How to get a man to treat you well?
The answer to this question is more for a series of articles than for a few paragraphs, but I will write briefly.
First, don't date men who obviously don't treat you well..
This seems to be an obvious rule. But, nevertheless, girls often try to date young people who, for whatever reason, treat a particular girl with disrespect.
A couple of examples of what it means to be disrespectful and respectful.
- A man who respects his woman is sincerely glad to see her, i.e. smiles, greets, hugs when meeting, helps to take off his coat, etc. A man who does not respect his woman twists his face when she appears.
- A man who respects his woman, tries to meet her, takes the initiative in scheduling the next meeting, calls, writes, etc. A man who does not respect his woman does not make dates himself, rarely calls, etc.
- A man who respects his woman, tries to make her laugh, help her (for example, when it is not necessary, he climbs with his advice), tries to do something else pleasant for her (to the best of his understanding and upbringing). A man who does not respect a woman expects to be pleased, but does nothing himself.
Even if at the stage of the first meetings, falling in love, etc., a man treats you badly, then it is unlikely that in the future it will be possible to radically change his relationship. This is understandable. It is much easier to correct something than to radically change.
Therefore, if a man already at the first meeting treats a woman disrespectfully, then they will not succeed. The exceptions are women who skillfully own the secrets of influencing men and usually relatively young men, whose behavior is more amenable to correction.
Secondly, if you started dating, then do not allow disrespectful behavior towards yourself.
What it is? Stop any rudeness towards you. Do not allow rude jokes to yourself, do not allow swearing at you and obscenities in your presence. Also, do not allow any other manifestations of disrespect. These may be late for a date, constant failure to fulfill elementary promises, failure to fulfill the rules of courtesy elementary for his circle (open the door in front of you, etc.).
Here I can not give unequivocal recommendations. What is absolutely normal for one circle of people (swearing, for example, when communicating with a woman), for another circle is a clear manifestation of disrespect for a woman, after which you need to leave immediately.
How to stop rudeness? There aren't too many options.
You can say that some of his behavior is unpleasant for you. The man himself will not guess, do not even hope. Of course, it is necessary to say not along the way, but to allocate at least 10 minutes for a conversation. Try to give understandable analogies for a man. For example, it is as unpleasant for you as this and that would be unpleasant for him.
The second option is you can leave. Leave, of course, in the most general sense of the word. Say that this behavior is unacceptable for you and hang up the phone. You can go home. Etc.
There, according to the situation, it is necessary to see whether reconciliation is possible and necessary at all. Did the man understand? Is he ready to do something so that his behavior is not repeated in the future.
The third option is gradual parenting, out of the context of specific situations in your relationship.
In the first case, I talked about your reaction to some specific, boorish, behavior of a man. Such conversations are usually quite conflicting, because men do not like criticism.
However, if in the process of communication, watching movies, etc. tell your man what such behavior is rude to you, but this is- unpleasant, but such Nice, it's a gradual learning.
Third, do not provoke rude behavior.
In the presence of some women, the vast majority of men are transformed and begin to behave as correctly as possible. In the presence of other women, the same men often turn into the likeness of animals.
Develop in yourself those qualities of a woman that stimulate correct behavior and do not provoke rudeness. A few examples to make it clear what we are talking about.
- Do not get drunk, especially if you lose control of your behavior,
- Do not flirt or cheat with other males,
Don't spend a man's money without his explicit consent. Be independent in money, at least until it comes to family,
- Do not tell others what was meant only for you,
Don't be pushy, don't call first, don't agree to have sex on the first date, etc.
Do not laugh at too “dirty” jokes, rudeness towards someone, do not speak rudely about strangers, painful failures of other people.
The implementation of these and other rules outlined in this article will definitely lead to much more respect, love, etc. for you.
Fifth. Instinct tells a woman that it is very desirable that a man be monogamous or, in other words, not cheat.
How to do to reduce the likelihood of cheating is a long conversation. However, the simplest thing to do is to say that monogamy with a partner is important to you.
The second simple rule is to practice monogamy yourself.
And here we are not even talking about treason in the truest sense of the word. We are talking about flirting with other men (especially in the presence of a man), communicating with "friends" who are the woman's former lovers (or at least wanted to sleep with her), etc. If the conversation turns to other girls (acquaintances, in films), then do not justify their betrayals.
Sixth. Keep the qualities that a man admired when you met.
As far as I have noticed, men's tastes change very slowly. Usually, those qualities of character and features of appearance that he liked when you met him, he may like him in 20-40 years without much change.
Remember what your loved one liked when you met. Try to restore these character traits, appearance features, etc. If you met recently, then just remember or better write down what your man likes and try to keep it in later life.
I don't know what exactly your partner likes, because men have slightly different taste in women. For example, this could be:
- your laughter, i.e. the ability to laugh for any reason, maybe not even very hard to tease and make fun of your loved one,
your sincerity. It's when you say, without fear, what you need, what you don't like, what delights you. And yet you do it despite the risk of resentment, without any thought of manipulation or anything. Pretty rare quality.
Your appearance. It is clear that appearance changes with age. But this process can be quite strongly delayed and even reversed up to a certain age. You can partially compensate for changes in appearance with sports, diet, good clothes, cosmetic procedures, etc. (We are not talking about lipsticks, varnishes, etc. things)
Seventh. Don't do things one way.
An important rule, especially for poorly educated men. Forget advice “Bring your favorite coffee to bed”, “Give phone, slippers, socks” or something else for him if he is badly brought up or selfish by nature.
You will never wait for such responses in your address. Rather, it is possible that in a couple of years you will only do what to bring a phone, slippers, coffee and do a dozen more similar things, and in return you will receive nothing, only discontent and abuse. If you stop doing something, you will receive sincere indignation in response.
About some kind of love in response to your similar "exploits" is out of the question. Forget about this crazy idea, throw out the magazine where you read this and delete the bookmark on the site where there are such articles.
Therefore, for poorly educated men, the answer is the same from the very beginning: "you need you and carry".
If a man is average or well brought up, then you can act a little differently. In this case, he is not a complete egoist, and is also ready to do something for you, more or less, depending on the circumstances.
Then, of course, you can do something for him or even do a lot. But do not hope too much that such actions can save love or strengthen it. Such actions should be natural when both partners are moderately selfish and want to give each other some pleasure.
Do not be afraid to demand response from your loved one. They don't have to be the same as yours. It is not necessary to calculate with ugly pettiness who did what to whom.
Nevertheless, some balance must be observed according to the rough rule: "You are for me, and I am for you." Don't be shy about it. In the joint life of a man and a woman, there is also some kind of exchange. It is clear that it can be very thin, uneven in some period of time, not always equal, etc.
However, if a woman does more for a man than he does for her, then the man has a well-founded opinion that he is a real “Star” and that his meager attempts in your direction are simply so valuable that they exceed your numerous, but invaluable services. .
Do you want to grow a "Star" from your favorite? Go ahead - it's not very difficult. Do you want a man to love and respect you? Then you don't need to grow a Star out of it. (As well as from myself).
Eighth. Praise a man, but do not underestimate your dignity.
It is useful and necessary to praise a man, although it is not so easy. I wrote in detail about how to praise a man in the first part of the book “How to make a man fall in love with you for life, or never run after a man, let him run after you.” If you remember a little, then you need to praise specific things, not general ones (not “you are smart”, but “you solved this difficult task well”), praise for certain actions, and not in advance, do not overpraise, etc.
But if applied to the topic of this article, then you need to praise a man, while not belittling your own dignity.
Praise: “You are a smart man, since you could do ...” is quite possible. Praise in the form: “You are a smart man, and I am a stupid woman ...” is absolutely not suitable. If you talk about yourself like that from time to time, then he will believe in it after a while. (Men are very gullible) Soon he will think that he is dating a stupid woman and that he needs to look somewhere for a smart woman who would truly appreciate his genius, because a stupid woman is not capable of this.
So, the first rule of this paragraph: Forget about the man's praise against the background of opposing yourself in a derogatory way.
The second rule is probably already clear to you. Don't forget to praise yourself in front of your partner. If you do not periodically praise your beloved, then the man will also praise you either rarely or very rarely. The exception is wise men, whom everyone has heard of, but no one has personally seen them.
That is, praise yourself more often. Praise yourself for a variety of reasons. Look for things to praise yourself for. Even what you say about yourself in praise is not entirely true, then the man will get used to it after a while and will assume that you are the way you talk about yourself. After all, I repeat, men are very gullible to the words of their beloved woman.
So, to keep a man in love, his desire and respect are interdependent tasks. It is clear that if there has never been a love, then no tricks can help (and can help). But if there was love, then use these tips and the man will be yours.
And a little afterword. Putting this advice into practice requires, first, knowing what to do. This knowledge is presented in this article and my books on the psychology of men on the website "Sunshine Hands". Secondly, they require minimal self-confidence. If self-confidence is not enough, then you may not be able to put the advice into practice. I wrote a book on developing confidence "How to Build Self-Confidence in 3 Months". Who cares, buy on the website "Sunshine Hands", study and develop confidence.
Sincerely, Rashid Kirranov.
1 871 0 Hello! From this article, you will learn how to become a beloved woman for your man, as well as what rules you should follow in order to become the best mother for your child.How to become happy and loved: from internal confidence to external attractiveness
Love is important to every person to varying degrees. The desire to be important, needed and necessary for someone is an integral part of self-acceptance and self-respect.
To find the answer to such an important question: how to become loved, you must first determine for yourself the criteria for love and happiness.
To get started, ask yourself two questions: Do you love yourself?" and " For what specifically?". What qualities do you think a woman should have to be loved? To be smart, educated, slim and fit, kind and affectionate, caring, strong, and sexy? Maybe she should be able to cook well, keep the house clean and tidy, sing and dance beautifully, always have time for everything?
Evaluate yourself on the feminine qualities that are important to you. Make a specific list of those criteria by which you feel that you do not reach the required minimum of attractiveness. Having decided on your own unattractive (in your opinion) qualities, start working on yourself.
How to start changing - consider below.
For clarity, let's look at an example:
You are embarrassed by the lack of grooming. So start taking care of yourself. Change your thinking. Understand that taking care of yourself does not mean exhausting you with diets, exorbitant physical exertion, spending fabulous sums on salon procedures.
Take care of yourself is:
- Let yourself sleep! With regular healthy eight-hour sleep, all metabolic processes in the body are adjusted and accelerated. The skin is saturated with oxygen and looks fresh. The mood rises, and the woman looks more attractive.
- Make a beautiful hairstyle! Today! Tomorrow! Every day! If it doesn’t work out on your own, go to the hairdresser’s, let the specialist teach you how to style your hair. With a regular haircut and coloring in the salon, the hair will always be in order. Buy good skin care products. They smell fragrant and make hair attractive.
- Moisturize your skin! Purchase some good quality face and body creams. After showering and washing, apply them on the body, arms, legs, face. Well nourished with nutrients, the skin is amazingly soft and smooth. As if glowing from within.
- Get a manicure! Once a week, set a time to trim your cuticles and apply nail polish. Take care of your hands. During the day they do a lot of work for you, be grateful to them, take care of them.
- Apply makeup! Lightweight and uncomplicated. Decorate, make up eyelashes and lips, skin tone. Your face is your calling card. Remember this always.
Taking care of yourself means... So one and only. Take care of yourself! Take care of your body. Buy yourself beautiful clothes! Not for anyone, but to pamper yourself. Feed yourself delicious food. Take up your favorite hobby. Start reading books and improve your education.
Improving daily, you will notice your attractiveness, and the question of how to become a beloved woman will gradually cease to torment you.
Having fallen in love with yourself and your body, starting to take care of it, you will be surprised how much you will become happier, stronger and more harmonious.
What kind of women do you love?
To find out how to become a girlfriend, you need to find out which ones. To do this, consider the main qualities that the representatives of the stronger sex consider the most significant when choosing a partner for a long-term relationship.
So, men love women:
- well-groomed. A woman should always be neat and smell good, no matter how long you've been together (1 week or 50 years).
- Athletic and fit. A tight body is a sexy body.
- Optimistic and cheerful. Forever aching, with a heap of problems, no one needs grumpy aunts. For a modern man, this is an extra burden. Relationships should be fun, not stressful.
- Attentive and kind. Evil gossip always scare men away. Aggression and hostility make a woman unattractive and unsexual.
- Hooked on. Having hobbies and interests. Happy doing their own thing. Knowing how to value their personal time.
- Respecting partner's personal space. Understanding that a man has his own hobbies, problems and responsibilities, which it is not at all necessary to share with a woman.
- Respect yourself, your point of view, your life. It's hard to love someone you don't respect.
- Striving for continuous development. For men, the main criterion for growth is career advancement and the accumulation of wealth. Naturally, a purposeful person needs a worthy developing partner. For women, it can be a career, getting additional education, improving culinary skills and much more.
- Unobtrusive. The constant pressure from the woman (endless calls and messages) causes a desire to hide and avoid contact.
- Respectful of their femininity. Allowing a man to feel strong, reliable and courageous next to a woman. Able to accept help from a partner. Requiring exceptionally good attitude.
- Satisfied with themselves. In most cases, a man treats a woman the same way she treats herself.
- Monogamous. A man must be sure of your fidelity.
- Grateful, generous with praise and approval, but only on merit.
- Knowing how to lead a life, cherishing family values.
- Having a good good sense of humor.
What to do to become loved by your man
How to become a girlfriend for your man?
First of all, you need to find out what feminine qualities are important for your partner.
If attractive appearance is of paramount importance - take care of yourself. Determine for yourself once and for all whether you are ready all your life for the sake of this man to restrict food, exercise, allocate a considerable amount of time to improve your appearance. Not ready - immediately abandon the idea. Since you stop caring for yourself, you will lose attractiveness for your partner.
Is personal space important to men? Excellent! How much time can you carve out for yourself? For your interesting activities, friends, for sports, to improve your appearance, but for anything? Forgive your man for his one-man hobbies and come up with your own. Which will make you happy.
If you really love your man and want reciprocity, be sincere. Be interested in his affairs, be attentive and friendly, often praise and approve of his actions. Find common interests. Always remain attractive, interesting and desirable for him. Dress up more often, do beautiful makeup, wear beautiful underwear. Make every effort so that the man admires you and wants to spend as much time as possible together.
For many women, their own happiness is identified with having a strong love relationship with a man. After the conclusion of the marriage union, the question becomes relevant: how to become a beloved wife and keep this status for many years?
The formation of a family and the registration of relationships for most men is possible only with a beloved woman. If the marriage took place, do not doubt the love of your partner. Enjoy the happy moments of family life.
In order for the state of love and interest not to be lost over time, a woman should always remember the priority qualities that initially attracted your man to you. Every day of living together, a woman needs to work on relationships. Above oneself. Not only to demand, but also to give. The principle of working on oneself should be the same as before marriage.
In order not to ask over time the question of how to become beloved for your husband, you do not have to stop being her. After years lived together, a woman should remain the same as she was able to fall in love with him.
All wives want their husband to earn more over time, increase his income and family capital. So men also want a woman to improve. After marriage, every wife expects fidelity and honesty from her husband. In the registry office, you "acquire" your particular man and expect that this is how he will always be. The same thing happens on the male side. A man acquires his specific woman (young, slim, beautiful, well-groomed). And when, after the time spent together, the wife stops taking care of herself, caring for and dressing up, becomes overweight, she ceases to be that particular woman. Don't you think that this is also a kind of deception? They promised themselves the one that the guy fell in love with, but in fact, they turned out to be far from ideal.
Every day try to be the best woman for your best man.
How to be a loving mother to your child
To become a beloved mother for your child, to build a trusting and respectful relationship, you must: love him, respect and trust him.
Rules for good mothers, regardless of the age of their child:
- Be attentive to your child. Take an interest in his business.
- Don't talk down to your child. A small person is also a person and needs acceptance and respect.
- Spend time together doing things that are interesting to you.
- Start . For example, once a week organize a movie together, a trip to the cinema, or something else. The main thing is that both of you want to do this and there is no desire to postpone the event until later.
- Don't criticize! And never compare yourself to other children. Your child is unique and there is no one else like it. Comparison with others is inappropriate and offensive. You don't like being compared for the worse.
- Do not categorically forbid. Always justify your refusals.
- Don't fool your child. Children are no less intelligent than adults. Get caught in a lie - do not expect trust.
- Trust your child yourself. It is rare that sincere non-reciprocal trust arises.
- Don't over-demand. The child doesn't owe you anything. You gave birth to him for yourself, not for him. And don't expect him to thank you for it.
- Love your child. Is always. Every day tell him about it, hug and kiss. Mom's love for children is the most important, doubts about this should never arise.
And finally! To feel loved and happy, remember more often about those who really love you, just the way you are. About parents, grandparents! Love them and remind them of your feelings for them. Mutual pleasant emotional moments will fill your life with joy and self-confidence.
Useful articles:
To love and be loved is the dream of every woman. They want to meet a man who will give love, and they will surround him with their love and care. Unfortunately, not everyone is lucky enough to meet her quickly. Despite attempts to fulfill their dream and a great desire, some of the fair sex do not know how to be desired by the opposite sex. This is sad, but not terrible, because any woman and at any age is capable of becoming desirable. The main thing is to understand that this is not a sentence and everything depends on you, and not on men.
How to become desirable for a man
To do this, you do not need to have a model appearance and figure, follow your every movement, look or word. It does not matter in the matter of conquering the opposite sex. You can be a recognized beauty with perfect facial features, but still be lonely. To behave in accordance with all the rules of etiquette and the charter of noble maidens and be alone, only occasionally changing partners, until the next one melts into a foggy distance.
It may seem strange, but in fact, few people like to live with an ideal person who cannot be reached. Such people make you feel not the best way. For this reason, most would prefer to have nothing to do with such self-esteem perfection than to try to match, breaking their lives with these fruitless attempts. After all, ideals do not exist and never existed. All people are too different for it to appear.
The behavior of such impeccable-looking women and their appearance are frightening, because men feel less significant next to them. They do not want to be weak and become a shadow of such a woman. Of course, they admire her beauty and article from the outside, but they are not ready to be around and build relationships, as they are sure in advance of losing.
If there are men next to them, then only those who have reached too great heights, and then, because their status and money easily compensate for the dignity of their companion, emphasizing their success. But even they, having decided to connect their lives with the one they like, pay attention not to her appearance, but to her intellect, interests, how she behaves. As they themselves tell girls who want to conquer them with their youth and beauty, that, in their opinion, female beauty is a capital that loses value over time, while their money only increases over time.
